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chuggo is BACK posted:I've heard a couple of swearing chants. Surprising to me, because I thought MLS was a family-friendly environment. I'm not mad, just surprised is all. Noted edgy fedora connoisseurs, the Portland Timbers, have a bunch of poo poo chants they think makes them sound cooler if they really emphasize the profanity.
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# ? May 18, 2024 18:43 |
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well Jozy fit the 300lb part of that equation
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Chas McGill posted:well Jozy fit the 300lb part of that equation He's also partial to 7 foot longs
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Bogan Krkic posted:Sundy
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chuggo is BACK posted:I've heard a couple of swearing chants. Surprising to me, because I thought MLS was a family-friendly environment. I'm not mad, just surprised is all. ahahahahahhahaa
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Let's do this again, because if a cute girl in glasses says so, I feel like it has to be true. Now that the 'perfect deal' Sunderland boss Gus Poyet struck to grab Jermain Defoe in exchange for Jozy Altidore has had a couple of months to take root, we can go to the math and see just how much of a 'different club' they've blossomed into... ahem. Just to remind, the Black Cats scored one goal every 66.8 minutes when the US striker was on the field in Premier League play, or 1.34 goals per 90 minutes of action with Altidore. They were even considerably more "prolific" if we include cup play minutes, but we will stayed settled on the Prem from this angle. After Defoe scored a couple of goals in his first four games, those who will not see danced around my Sunderland math to further proclaim Altidore the poorest excuse ever for a player and the team was now free to shine and so on. Since then, Defoe has gone six games without a goal and the Sunderland game on the ball has regressed even further from the curious shambles of the Jozy era. In eight league games since the swap, Sunderland are 1-4-3, with but five goals scored (or 0.63 per 90 minutes). They have scored just once in the last 588 minutes of play, and that strike did not come from any of their forwards. Speaking of Steven Fletcher and Connor Wickham, they have combined for all of one goal in those eight games (and none in the three cup games over this span). In those eight games, Sunderland created five chances or fewer four times. They managed 76 shot attempts, with 29 of them coming from at least 24 (and up to nearly 40) yards from goal. The tactically clueless or unwilling midfielders and wingers have failed to bust 45% possession in four of those games, making it no surprise that the teams leading assist man this season is a newcomer left back that has missed 10 games to injury. No surprise, either, that he (Patrick van Aanholt) is Dutch... but I digress from that artery of discussion. Across all competitions, the Black Cats have been shut out six times in 11 games - including home games against Fulham, QPR and Aston Villa. They were also shut out at League One Bradford City after having bumbled their way to the FA Cup sweet 16. The forward stable has barely even looked like scoring since January ended. Poyet actually positioned Fletcher out wide in a live game, because apparently that counted as a solution idea. Hell, the manager managed to enact a system that has worked to generously grant savior Defoe (who, mind you, spent years upon years scoring once every 196 minutes of EPL play before arriving at Sunderland)) a whopping sum of 21.5 non-defensive touches per game. And Defoe has created only two chances for teammates in eight games. Altidore did that once every 77 minutes of EPL time. The American also easily wins the aerial comparison (4.73 air duel wins per 90 minutes to Defoe's 0.13). You may say, gosh, that is a dumb comparison, but Poyet has often used Defoe as the No. 9 lone striker. Oh, they are a different club alright. There is dumb, and then there is dumberer. It sure looks as though Toronto FC and MLS swindled Sunderland harder than I had originally estimated. While so many want to believe that Altidore was the main problem with Sunderland, the statistical needle sure leans toward my consistent view that his tenure there was more a case of Sunderland being the main problem with Altidore. Meanwhile, Poyet was fiiiiiiinally axed this week and the Black Cats are reportedly in talks with Dutch guy Dick Advocaat. Will wonders never cease?
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I don't think there are any cute girls in glasses on BigSoccer so hell, I'm not sure what to think of Josmer.
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runoverbobby posted:I don't think there are any cute girls in glasses on BigSoccer so hell, I'm not sure what to think of Josmer. My money's on the poster they were referencing being some fat Timbers fan with a Zooey Deschanel avatar. (her sister Emily is better-looking, but that's not important)
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Troy Queef posted:My money's on the poster they were referencing being some fat Timbers fan with a Zooey Deschanel avatar.
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Troy Queef posted:My money's on the poster they were referencing being some fat Timbers fan with a Zooey Deschanel avatar. I dunno, they are both very attractive but my money is on zooey
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If you'd like to read a future Grantland writer screed about Jozy's performance in these categories; Tough touches, Total Turnovers, Aerial Duels, Hold-Up Plays, and Pressure Valve Plays With some humorous quotes like "C'mon Jozy... unleash the Kraken on these fools already" and "Still, it remains readily apparent that he is probably the biggest team player on Sunderland, and that he needs to dial that typically admirable trait back a few notches if he ever expects to score in their shirt." Then click here http://www.noshortcorners.com/2014/12/wonder-twins-activate-form-of-stat-nerd.html
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![]() What more could you ask of your strikers than that they help you keep a clean sheet?
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Jozy isn't a world beater or even a good player but holy poo poo Sunderland is terrible and was definitely hurting him more than the other way around, let's not lose sight of how terrible Sunderland is for all involved.
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Parody Threads posted:Jozy isn't a world beater or even a good player but holy poo poo Sunderland is terrible and was definitely hurting him more than the other way around, let's not lose sight of how terrible Sunderland is for all involved. a team with a terrible forward who kept falling down
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Greg, I'm one of the biggest Jozy defenders out there, but how does one counter the argument that Jozy's off the ball movement leaves something to be desired? At times I find myself frustrated by his positioning, especially in the offensive third. Maybe this accounts for his low number or touches going towards goal, or his lack of touches in the box. But like you said in a previous post, this Blunderland team doesn't bother attempting through balls, as their game plan seems to be sky it down field and hope for the best.
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chuggo is BACK posted:Greg, I'm one of the biggest Jozy defenders out there, but how does one counter the argument that Jozy's off the ball movement leaves something to be desired? At times I find myself frustrated by his positioning, especially in the offensive third. Maybe this accounts for his low number or touches going towards goal, or his lack of touches in the box. But like you said in a previous post, this Blunderland team doesn't bother attempting through balls, as their game plan seems to be sky it down field and hope for the best. Blunderland B'land Bland ![]()
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Bobby Digital posted:Blunderland BBB... brapbrapbrap
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Troy Queef posted:(her sister Emily is better-looking, but that's not important) I disagree I think it's very important that people recognize Emily as the better looking one.
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chuggo is BACK posted:Greg, I'm one of the biggest Jozy defenders out there, but how does one counter the argument that Jozy's off the ball movement leaves something to be desired? At times I find myself frustrated by his positioning, especially in the offensive third. Maybe this accounts for his low number or touches going towards goal, or his lack of touches in the box. But like you said in a previous post, this Blunderland team doesn't bother attempting through balls, as their game plan seems to be sky it down field and hope for the best. gregs instagram has been pretty busy ![]()
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advanced statsman posted:gregs instagram has been pretty busy greg finally touched a boob!
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Shrapnig posted:BBB... My god, this conspiracy goes all the way to slightly above the relegation zone.
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advanced statsman posted:gregs instagram has been pretty busy Meanwhile Im gay Modedit: That isn't funny idiot (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST) Somebody fucked around with this message at 21:49 on Mar 26, 2015 |
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![]() http://gfycat.com/FormalMarriedCarpenterant
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Showed a good turn of pace to catch that guy and make the tactical foul. Things are looking up.
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Parity warning posted:
Thats some top shelf ref abuse there.
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Parity warning posted:
I loved his surprise at being sent off for that
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Is Jozy suspended today then?
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Looks like he will be playing, this will hopefully be entertaining to see with my own two eyes at Toyota Park
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Defoe scores an amazing goal to drag Sunderland out of relegation and win the derby, is cheered heartily by the home faithful. Jozy falls over a lot as Toronto lose again to a bottom tier MLS squad, fails to score against a garbage back line of random rookies and 100 year old Jeff Larentowitz.
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Please tell me there's some Jozyfan posts out there explaining exactly why Defoe is bad.
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Coohoolin posted:Please tell me there's some Jozyfan posts out there explaining exactly why Defoe is bad. ![]() ![]() ![]()
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Bobby Digital posted:Blunderland A coincidence I assure you
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lol they're still going on about a friendly from three years ago
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Coohoolin posted:Please tell me there's some Jozyfan posts out there explaining exactly why Defoe is bad. http://www.noshortcorners.com/2015/01/black-cats-adorable.html
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Yo this is some hot fire right here. Greg spitting the truth unfiltered. So glad I don't have to watch anymore Sunderland games in order to catch a rare glimpse of Altidore. That sh*t painful to watch.
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chuggo is BACK posted:Yo this is some hot fire right here. Greg spitting the truth unfiltered. So glad I don't have to watch anymore Sunderland games in order to catch a rare glimpse of Altidore. That sh*t painful to watch. Jozy is a fat fraud haha.
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chuggo is BACK posted:Yo this is some hot fire right here. Greg spitting the truth unfiltered. So glad I don't have to watch anymore Sunderland games in order to catch a rare glimpse of Altidore. That sh*t painful to watch. I'm glad Greg found a place to express his love for Jozy without being ridiculed.
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Jozy was on the pitch for 90 minutes against a team that's bad even by MLS standards and he managed one (1) shot on goal. Also he fell down and threw his arms in the air. The commentators also commended his "hold-up play" when he did nothing of the sort and I got mad.
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*holds up LA Galaxy scarf and wario tifo* Hold up, plaaaayyyyy Yeah that Jozy he be lookin real soft He don't plaaayy For the s'land where the wheels fell off Hold up, plaaayyyy In mls he actin real bold Take a seeeaaattt Hope ya ready for the next episode HeyyyeyyyeEYEYyyyEYYYY.... .... He won't score today!
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# ? May 18, 2024 18:43 |
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I am still so happy that Portland didn't buy him. So, so happy.
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