|
Internet Wizard posted:I had a roommate get blackout drunk and come stumbling back to the room at around 2200 one Saturday night. Took him about 20 minutes to finish flailing around the room trying to get undressed enough to go to bed, ended up getting stuck between his desk and the wall for about 5 minutes at one point. this exact same scenario played out in front of me back in my barracks days, down to the words uttered in the morning. minus the gay navy lingo, of course. this was also the same roommate that i came home to one saturday morning from the bars, only to find him sitting at his desk staring at a piece of dashboard trim in front of him. from his brand new car that he bought earlier that night and promptly rolled 3 times. he hadn't bothered to get insurance yet. i laughed in his face he later ended up marrying the first sergeant's daughter
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 02:51
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 16, 2024 08:04 |
|
|
Here's my dumb idiot story from a civ. The news station I work for lost all their file photos in a poo poo storm with the IT department, so we're in the process of putting everything back together. The other day i was driving past the local reserve armory and thought 'oh hey, we don't have a picture of that'. Cue me pulling over in the parking lot, getting out, and taking pictures of the outside of the base for a few minutes, and then getting back in my car. It's right about then that three dudes in camo come boiling out from inside the office looking Very Concerned that someone is taking pictures of the office. I obligingly get back out of my car and explain that, yes, I am a member of the media, here are my credentials, no, I am not a terrorist. Eventually the XO comes out and starts chatting with me about how 'these sort of times' mean that the military needs to be vigilant about This Sort of Thing and 'just call us first next time'. I drive off with my camera unmolested, at least.
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 05:26
|
|
|
Just some morons trying to feel important.
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 05:33
|
|
|
Next time tell the reserve idiots to suck dicks.
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 05:55
|
|
|
Casimir Radon posted:They can't go anywhere without something dumb happening. See: Guy wakes up in a ditch with no pants on. That's just good clean fun Also Mike-o posted:Next time tell the reserve idiots to suck dicks.
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 06:00
|
|
|
What if it's not their weekend to suck dicks?
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 06:04
|
|
|
Wild T posted:What if it's not their weekend to suck dicks? if it's the weekend before then it's already ruined because they're dreading the dick sucking thats gonna happen that weekend
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 06:12
|
|
|
iyaayas01 posted:That's just good clean fun
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 06:33
|
|
|
Casimir Radon posted:It kind of seems like there was a beat up by Hawaiins story at some point too. But it's gotten to the point I can't tell if I dreamed it or not. 
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 06:59
|
|
|
I was Jody for a marine while I was in hawaii. Dude walked in on us after we were finished, told me to leave, then fingerbanged her and tasted it when I was gone.
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 07:10
|
|
|
holy poo poo im losing it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BMCFRElyaCc
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 08:31
|
|
|
Nostalgia4Butts posted:holy poo poo im losing it 250k. What a loving retard.
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 08:38
|
|
|
ded posted:I was Jody for a marine while I was in hawaii. Dude walked in on us after we were finished, told me to leave, then fingerbanged her and tasted it when I was gone. Technically I think that counts as a three way.
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 08:39
|
|
|
Nostalgia4Butts posted:holy poo poo im losing it Spot the guy who got a sweet deal on his mustang with 25% APR
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 08:59
|
|
|
Nostalgia4Butts posted:holy poo poo im losing it 
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 09:21
|
|
|
Also the girl who was airing all her grievances on Facebook after not getting the job she wanted, found out more about that. Apparently she was saying stuff like "Am I overqualified?!". As it turns out the ASVAB requirement for paralegal is 58, she couldn't swing that. So no. They did just let her reenlist again, for 6 more years.
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 09:42
|
|
|
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 14:41
|
|
|
 https://wikileaks.org/trident-safety/ holy poo poo this guy is hosed quote:quote:Opsec Wizard Edit: Laugh at this idiot via the link. Somebody fucked around with this message at 00:42 on May 21, 2015 |
|
#
?
May 19, 2015 14:42
|
|
|
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad posted:
Jesus
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 11:10
|
|
|
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad posted:
that expiry date is wrong
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 11:17
|
|
|
Has he scheduled his sex change yet?
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 11:28
|
|
|
Caconym posted:Too much detail is probably opsec? To be fair, the norwegian navy have had a bad habit of lighting that class of vessel on fire. I just wish they would set fire to Valkyrien next
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 13:38
|
|
|
So how bad are things going to be for submariners now that the Irish Terrorist Robot hosed them over? I'm guessing there will be massive amounts of bullshit, but maybe cooler heads will prevail.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 13:45
|
|
|
Frosted Flake posted:So how bad are things going to be for submariners now that the Irish Terrorist Robot hosed them over? When it comes to subs, there is no such thing as 'cooler heads'
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 16:01
|
|
|
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad posted:
 My rear end in a top hat instinctively puckered reading that. He's gonna get the hate-gently caress the NSA wishes they could give to Snowden. e:  also seems strangely appropriate
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 18:09
|
|
|
fjelltorsk posted:To be fair, the norwegian navy have had a bad habit of lighting that class of vessel on fire. I just wish they would set fire to Valkyrien next The "Disposable grill"-class earned its nickname with style and honor. 
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 18:20
|
|
|
Frosted Flake posted:So how bad are things going to be for submariners now that the Irish Terrorist Robot hosed them over? Probably further restriction of personal owned electronics, particularly while in port. Maybe some more stringent security measures for areas containing classified materials and the like. I doubt they'll really beef up security all that much. Just further restrictions of liberties.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 19:48
|
|
|
Wild T posted:When ALLIED STRIKE was a thing, without fail every year one of the JTACs would get shmammered and piss in someone's bunk. Once or twice while someone was sleeping in it. I've sat and pondered the fact that I've been so drunk I've been on the verge of hospitalization, but never walked over to someone else's bunk and pissed into it. I really feel like I've been doing something wrong all my life. Hahaha whats with the military and people pissing in each others bunks this happened at my barracks aswell (during my compulsory military service). This dude was so drunk after the first night of leave during basic training, he came staggering into the room (god knows how he got past the gate guards) and just without even stopping to think, he walked over to his empty bunk, dropped his pants to his anckles and pissed right into his own it while rubbing his face and moaning. He then tried to get into it, but upon noticing it was wet, he shuffled over to the neighbouring bunk (pants still around his anckles) and started cursing at the poor guy lying there, blaming him for pissing in his bed. He was then tossed out of the room along with his pisstained mattress. They found him the next day, lying under the stairs, pants still around anckles, and piss stained mattress jammed halfway out of the hallway window.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 20:07
|
|
|
Guest2553 posted:
Christ, are sub control rooms not considered a scif? Or are they, but with literally no enforcement of device policy?
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 20:26
|
|
|
Kawasaki Nun posted:Probably further restriction of personal owned electronics, particularly while in port. Maybe some more stringent security measures for areas containing classified materials and the like. I doubt they'll really beef up security all that much. Just further restrictions of liberties. how good is the cell phone service on a sub? i wasn't serious until i actually typed it out because the obvious answer is that there is no cell service on a sub but maybe?
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 20:33
|
|
|
A Man With A Plan posted:Christ, are sub control rooms not considered a scif? Or are they, but with literally no enforcement of device policy? Depends on what charts are on the plotter. No joke.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 21:04
|
|
|
Cole posted:how good is the cell phone service on a sub? Maybe if you get into port and have a phone? These days internet access on a ship is a huge deal since with email Facebook and Skype you can connect to home a little bit. It's a small thing but a very big small thing.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 21:13
|
|
|
Cole posted:how good is the cell phone service on a sub? Cell service isn't much of an issue when you can take pictures or video of entire manuals then upload it later or whatever this guy did.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 21:23
|
|
|
ded posted:Depends on what charts are on the plotter. No joke. That's hilarious, in a kind of bureaucratic way
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 21:45
|
|
|
A Man With A Plan posted:Christ, are sub control rooms not considered a scif? Or are they, but with literally no enforcement of device policy? According to him, the latter.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 22:09
|
|
|
A Man With A Plan posted:That's hilarious, in a kind of bureaucratic way
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 23:28
|
|
|
The fuckups everyone hates aren't going to flame out hilariously anymore. They're just going to leak a bunch of stuff, get locked up, and become heroes to other losers who couldn't even muster up the effort to get off the couch and go to the recruitment office.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 23:34
|
|
|
But it's so easy to post "Snowden is an American hero" on reddit.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2015 23:42
|
|
|
Tunicate posted:According to him, the latter. Having anything with a microphone or camera on it anywhere other than berthing / the mess decks was a huge deal on my boat. People weren't frisked or anything but you could get hosed pretty good if you got caught with one, particularly if you were actually using it.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2015 01:42
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 16, 2024 08:04 |
|
|
A Man With A Plan posted:That's hilarious, in a kind of bureaucratic way Fart Sandwiches posted:Literally "please don't look in that direction if your aren't cleared" Well they do put a curtain up around the plot table when they have the special ones out. And everyone on the boat has a minimum of a secret + codeword clearance. This is for LA class boats I don't know about others, but I would guess the layout is pretty much the same since on Virginia boats they even shoved sonar into control 
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2015 02:34
|
|