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  • Locked thread
raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless

LethalGeek posted:

I'm a huge slut and never caught this crap. Are you all really barebacking strangers because if so LOL

It's not a stranger if you're going for the second round.

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Jim Barris
Aug 13, 2009
I'm pretty sure the clap does come with symptoms cause I distinctly remember pissing fire when I caught it.

JakeP
Apr 27, 2003

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Lipstick Apathy
Do we post okcupid stories itt? Just moved to a new city, and don't know anybody so I have been pofing and okcing a bunch. Anyway I started talking to a pretty hot girl and we decided to meet up pretty quickly. I guess it should have a huge red flag that under "I spend a Lot of Time Thinking About" was listed Feminism and Athiesm. I mean I am an athiest too, but its not something I go around bragging about, and whats to think about not believing in stuff? The other red flag should have been that she invited me to her place for the first date after like 10 minutes of talking, and after asking me if "I am not just looking for a hookup?"

Anyway I get there, and she is wasted. I thought just drunk at the time, but it would later come up that she takes xanex and klonopin recreationally, so she was probably pilled out too. We were talking and it was fine, and all of a sudden she started talking about feminism, and literally burst into tears, like full on crying, with snot dripping and poo poo. I think I laughed? It was surreal, she got over it though. She seemed to try to pick political fights and stuff like that I think, but I was pretty careful about saying anything triggering, so it was mostly fine. I think at one point I mentioned that I like to cook, and she god defensive like I was suggesting women should cook or something (I imagine she was barely listening to me because of how drunk/high she was but the word cooking triggered her). Eventually we started making out and she shut up.

Anyway I ended up going over there the next night because she called me at 11pm and asked me to come over, and the sex was good the night before, so I ended up going over there, despite knowing better. She wasn't wasted yet when I got there, but she was getting started. At some point she started arguing that Casey Anthony (the woman who murdered her baby and got away with it) wouldn't have gotten media attention if she was a guy, and trying to explain how she wasn't a villain like she was portrayed. She actually didn't even know most of the facts, just wanted to spout feminist rhetoric. Then she brought up Redit, and basically accused me of being a redditor, and she hates redditors. I don't read reddit, and I explained this, and she started getting really mad about the Fappening, and accused me of probably spending hours looking at the pictures. I guess this was all I could take, because it was just getting too ridiculous. I actually never checked out the fappening pics because its not 1998 and I don't jerk of to jpegs, but I told her that yes I jerked off to the fappening pics 1000's of times, and that if the women didn't want me to they shouldn't have posted them to the cloud (I don't believe this, but I knew it would get a reaction out of her). She kicked me out.


Online dating is the worst

damn horror queefs
Oct 14, 2005

say hello
say hello to the man in the elevator
wet it up

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

The Hague
tryna get me
for these glutes

I barebacked a girl right after meeting up for dinner a month ago

shes my girlfriend now so I guess its okay

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

The Hague
tryna get me
for these glutes

JakeP posted:

Do we post okcupid stories itt? Just moved to a new city, and don't know anybody so I have been pofing and okcing a bunch. Anyway I started talking to a pretty hot girl and we decided to meet up pretty quickly. I guess it should have a huge red flag that under "I spend a Lot of Time Thinking About" was listed Feminism and Athiesm. I mean I am an athiest too, but its not something I go around bragging about, and whats to think about not believing in stuff? The other red flag should have been that she invited me to her place for the first date after like 10 minutes of talking, and after asking me if "I am not just looking for a hookup?"

Anyway I get there, and she is wasted. I thought just drunk at the time, but it would later come up that she takes xanex and klonopin recreationally, so she was probably pilled out too. We were talking and it was fine, and all of a sudden she started talking about feminism, and literally burst into tears, like full on crying, with snot dripping and poo poo. I think I laughed? It was surreal, she got over it though. She seemed to try to pick political fights and stuff like that I think, but I was pretty careful about saying anything triggering, so it was mostly fine. I think at one point I mentioned that I like to cook, and she god defensive like I was suggesting women should cook or something (I imagine she was barely listening to me because of how drunk/high she was but the word cooking triggered her). Eventually we started making out and she shut up.

Anyway I ended up going over there the next night because she called me at 11pm and asked me to come over, and the sex was good the night before, so I ended up going over there, despite knowing better. She wasn't wasted yet when I got there, but she was getting started. At some point she started arguing that Casey Anthony (the woman who murdered her baby and got away with it) wouldn't have gotten media attention if she was a guy, and trying to explain how she wasn't a villain like she was portrayed. She actually didn't even know most of the facts, just wanted to spout feminist rhetoric. Then she brought up Redit, and basically accused me of being a redditor, and she hates redditors. I don't read reddit, and I explained this, and she started getting really mad about the Fappening, and accused me of probably spending hours looking at the pictures. I guess this was all I could take, because it was just getting too ridiculous. I actually never checked out the fappening pics because its not 1998 and I don't jerk of to jpegs, but I told her that yes I jerked off to the fappening pics 1000's of times, and that if the women didn't want me to they shouldn't have posted them to the cloud (I don't believe this, but I knew it would get a reaction out of her). She kicked me out.


Online dating is the worst

Why didn't you just agree and gently caress her regardless

JakeP
Apr 27, 2003

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Lipstick Apathy

LeoMarr posted:

Why didn't you just agree and gently caress her regardless

my eyes started to hurt from how hard I was rolling them

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

The Hague
tryna get me
for these glutes

JakeP posted:

my eyes started to hurt from how hard I was rolling them

well yeah tbh I can't really blame you


Once a girl knows the 8 words you will be good

Feed me, gently caress me, Shut the gently caress up

She failed to shut the gently caress up which killed the other 4 important words.

JakeP
Apr 27, 2003

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Lipstick Apathy
omg lol she just texted me

Flo Cytometer
Apr 20, 2015

by Ralp
its just another dog dick [page 1/10]

toggle
Nov 7, 2005

JakeP posted:

omg lol she just texted me

~you gave her that good dick~

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

The Hague
tryna get me
for these glutes

JakeP posted:

omg lol she just texted me

post results

Lawman 0
Aug 17, 2010

JakeP posted:

omg lol she just texted me

:munch:

Shirley Crabtree
Aug 8, 2012
Gonna be a long day off work, after I've been to the gym this morning I have 2 dates today one daytime and one evening. I tried to get them booked in on different days but it just wasn't happening. Daytime date is the most promising as far as potential girlfriend material goes, evening date will likely result in a shag. There will be very little changeover period between the two. Good times.

JakeP
Apr 27, 2003

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Lipstick Apathy

LeoMarr posted:

post results

I didn't get kicked out this time, but man she is still intolerable and obnoxious.

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Aug 1, 1981

Jim Barris posted:

I'm pretty sure the clap does come with symptoms cause I distinctly remember pissing fire when I caught it.

It can be symptomless but my pee gets cloudy, it burns to pee, I need to pee even when I don't have much pee left in me, and my balls get tight and uncomfortable.

Boywhiz88
Sep 11, 2005

floating 26" off da ground. BURR!

JakeP posted:

I didn't get kicked out this time, but man she is still intolerable and obnoxious.



Wet it up

Breetai
Nov 6, 2005

🥄Mah spoon is too big!🍌

:psypop:

Tumble
Jun 24, 2003
I'm not thinking of anything!

She answered right and that's a badass answer. I'd ask her out.

vyst
Aug 25, 2009



Tumble posted:

She answered right and that's a badass answer. I'd ask her out.

Leon Einstein
Feb 6, 2012
I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

Jim Barris posted:

I'm pretty sure the clap does come with symptoms cause I distinctly remember pissing fire when I caught it.

Chlamydia isn't the clap, noob.

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

The Hague
tryna get me
for these glutes

JakeP posted:

I didn't get kicked out this time, but man she is still intolerable and obnoxious.

Yeah she probably has daddy issues and gets away from them by being hosed by people who hate her

so keep tapping the well till the well runs dry.

JakeP
Apr 27, 2003

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Lipstick Apathy
Thanks for advice SA OKC thread!

Lawman 0
Aug 17, 2010

how far are you guys willing to drive for a date?
(I live in the middle of nowhere)

Tumble
Jun 24, 2003
I'm not thinking of anything!

Lawman 0 posted:

how far are you guys willing to drive for a date?
(I live in the middle of nowhere)

Depends how much game you got, and how promising the date seems (have you messaged back and forth a few times with a tinge of chemistry?)

I'll drive up to 45 minutes to an hour away, but I make sure it's an area with a few places to hop around to if the date goes well (and keep hotel money available), and also stuff to entertain me if it goes poorly.

InFlames235
Jan 13, 2004

LIKE THE WAVES IN THE OCEAN I WILL DIG IN YOUR FAT AND SEARCH FOR YOUR CLITORIS, BUT I WON'T SLAM WHALE

Lawman 0 posted:

how far are you guys willing to drive for a date?
(I live in the middle of nowhere)

I live in San Fran and have an afternoon coffee date today with someone in Berkeley. Probably overall 30 - 45 mins to get there and that's where I'd max it out.

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

The Hague
tryna get me
for these glutes

InFlames235 posted:

I live in San Fran and have an afternoon coffee date today with someone in Berkeley. Probably overall 30 - 45 mins to get there and that's where I'd max it out.

Wanna go have coffe inflames235?

InFlames235
Jan 13, 2004

LIKE THE WAVES IN THE OCEAN I WILL DIG IN YOUR FAT AND SEARCH FOR YOUR CLITORIS, BUT I WON'T SLAM WHALE

LeoMarr posted:

Wanna go have coffe inflames235?

Sure baybee :allears:

Yermaw Zahoor
Feb 24, 2009

Lawman 0 posted:

how far are you guys willing to drive for a date?
(I live in the middle of nowhere)

Just don't drive across state lines :v:

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

The Hague
tryna get me
for these glutes

InFlames235 posted:

Sure baybee :allears:

cool I live on 6th aswell

vyst
Aug 25, 2009



Lawman 0 posted:

how far are you guys willing to drive for a date?
(I live in the middle of nowhere)

As far as it takes to get laid

LadyPictureShow
Nov 18, 2005

Success!



I tend to get a lot of messages from non-native English speakers and guys that *clearly* didn't bother to read anything in my profile. It's nothing offensive really, but when a dude's got two kids and lists himself as being very serious about Islam...

quote:

Hey there
You are an interesting and beautiful girl, for real.
It seems that we are like 2 different souls in 2 separate bodies :)
I just thought it a nice ice breaker!!!
What do you think avout grabbing some iced coffee

I mean, I get what dude was going for, but everybody is a different soul in a separate body...

I also had a guy send me multiple messages in French, even after I told him I didn't speak French. Google translate tells me he was trying to ask me out to dinner.

LadyPictureShow fucked around with this message at 22:05 on Jun 14, 2015

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

The Hague
tryna get me
for these glutes

i wet my athletic supporter for foreigners

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


Do these women from the Philippines really think I'm gonna fly em and over and get em a green card.

damn horror queefs
Oct 14, 2005

say hello
say hello to the man in the elevator
page 69

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

The Hague
tryna get me
for these glutes

Groovelord Neato posted:

Do these women from the Philippines really think I'm gonna fly em and over and get em a green card.

oh so im not the only one who gets these

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

The Hague
tryna get me
for these glutes

y self-summary
My name is Hypatia. I am a self-employedseamstress born and raised in the Bay Area. My friends are nerds, punks, artists, Burners. I value art, good company, self-expression, and intellect. I am a nerd, a Burner, artistically inclined, decently intelligent and introspective. I attend Burning Man (where I work with Lamplighters, Gate, and DPW), participate in Dickens Fair, go to anime conventions. I play Magic, LARP, and draft clothing patterns. I occasionally go rock climbing, at Mission Cliffs-- looking for climbing buddies. I'm also poly and in a long-term relationship.

larp/gamer/con-goer/fetish/goth/ren fair/dickens/burning man/comic book/tech people.

I want to have more adventures.

I am awkward, empathetic, and passionate.
What I’m doing with my life
I am a seamstress/costume designer.

The skills. I want them all.

Thinking of moving to Thailand for a spell.
I’m really good at
Making awesome clothes, fashion design, and fairly good at math. I generally consider myself somewhat resourceful.

I'm good at defying the odds and making ends meet.
The first things people usually notice about me
People tend to comment first on my abnormally colored hair.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
All of these lists are outdated and need to be updated, but I'm lazy and the lists would all be stupid-long if they were all-encompassing.

Fyodor Dostoyevsky; Neil Gaiman; Oscar Wilde; Garth Nix; Oh, The Glory Of It All by Sean Wilsey; Aldous Huxley; It's Kind Of A Funny Story by Ned Vizzini; This Is Burning Man by Brian Doherty; Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglass Adams, Lewis Carroll, J.R. Dobbs, Watership Down by Richard Adams, Song of Ice and Fire aka Game of Thrones by George R. R. Martin. Currently reading Contact by Carl Sagan. And many, many more.

Trainspotting, Pi, Lover, Battle Royale, Hot Fuzz, Kondom des Grauens/The Killer Condom, Breakfast Club, Hackers, Fight Club, Gran Torino, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Shaun Of The Dead, Amelie, Paprika, District B-13, Visitor Q, and Donnie Darko.

I like foreign movies, zombie/horror films, noir... I dislike modern comedy movies, romantic comedies/dramas, and college/high-school humor movies.

Walking Dead, Simpsons, Breaking Bad, Lie to Me, Project Runway, American Greed, Doctor Who, Battlestar Galactica, Firefly, Castle, Star Trek.

I listen to just about everything except for modern rap, country, and ska. My musical tastes are pretty varied, and oftentimes erratic, usually depending on whim, and my current mental/emotional state.

Bush, Ace of Base, Tool, Bit Shifter, She Wants Revenge, The Birthday Massacre, The Scissor Sisters, Weird Al Yankovic, Tom Lehrer, Snow Patrol, Doctor Demento, Incubus, Pendulum, Dresden Dolls, Nightwish, Vermillion Lies, Venetian Snares, Beats Antique, The Vitamin String Quartet, Rammstein, The Section Quartet, Queens of the Stone Age, Apocalyptica, Clint Mansell, PDQ Bach, Lonely Island, Richard Cheese, Louis Armstrong, Skinny Puppy, Queen, Bauhaus, Voltaire, Seymour Bits, Paul Anka, ZZ Top, Johnny Cash, Mindless Self Indulgence, Muse, Jonathan Coulton, MC Chris, Richard Cheese, E.S. Posthumus, Depeche Mode, Jem, and Flight of The Conchords.

As far as manga/comic books go, I am fond of: Transmetropolitan, Preacher, Scrooge McDuck, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, Girl Genius, Akira, Azumanga Daioh, Chobits, Cowboy Bebop, Nana, Revolutionary Girl Utena, Optic Nerve, Ubu Bubu, and Princess Ai.

Online comics:
Ctrl+Alt+Del, Questionable Content, xkcd, John and John, Collar 6, The Adventures of Dr. McNinja, Overcompensating, This Is Indexed, Least I Could Do, Penny Arcade, VG Cats, Girl Genius, Sinfest, 8-Bit Theater, Better Days, Sluggy Freelance, Cyanide and Happiness, Neurotically Yours, and Kawaii Not.

I play Magic: The Gathering, and I LARP; neither as often as I'd like. Truth be told, I play Dominion far more often than either of those. I played World of Warcraft for a little bit, but got bored and abandoned it. I always appreciate finding more people to play tabletops/Magic/etc with. I used to play Ragnarok Online obsessively. For those who don't know, it's a MMORPG. I love Red versus Blue, and one of my favorite animes is Elfen Lied.

I don't play video games much anymore, but back in the day, I was an oldschool video game nerd. I frequently watch AVGN a.k.a. the Angry Video Game Nerd. The newest game console I have is the PS1. I enjoy old-school Legend of Zelda, all of the Mario games, most of the old-school Megaman games, and of course, Final Fantasy, although I never played any past Final Fantasy IX. As far as new-gen games, I like: Portal, Left For Dead, Resident Evil, Super Smash Brothers, Grand Theft Auto, and the Halo series.

I am a sucker for good food. I love fettuccine alfredo, Eritrean, Indian, Senegalese food, lamb, chocolate soufflé, boiled carrots, creamed corn, anything with pesto, any kind of potatoes, and generally anything that's really, really bad for me. I like spices, not spicy. I like sushi, but hate cooked seafood.

I AM ALWAYS OPEN TO NEW SUGGESTIONS FOR ANY OF THE SUB-CATEGORIES LISTED ABOVE.
The six things I could never do without
1. The Internet
2. My crafts
3. Social interaction
4. Love
5. Challenge/adversity
6. Music

In no real order.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Travelling, creative upcycling, camping, how much I hate politicians, polyamory, how to make a better pillow fort, why the gently caress Dave hates me so much, whether or not I watch too much Netflix.
On a typical Friday night I am
You know, some of us don't work 9-to-5 at an office, so Friday has no special significance to us.

Hanging out with people watching movies, used to LARP every other Friday, listening to music and browsing the web, inebriation.

Occasionally go to Death Guild on Mondays at the DNA Lounge, and occasion Fridays at the Cat Club.

Occasionally go to the poly munch at Wicked Grounds-- every month, third Monday.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I legitimately enjoy Nickelback.

I am hopelessly addicted to smoking.
They’re looking for
All who like bi women
Ages 21–36
Near me
For new friends, short-term dating
You should message me if
I'm always happy to hear from new people.

You are a slightly off-kilter soul, a nerd, a gamer, a punk, an eclectic person, a non-crazy weirdo.

You actually READ my profile, instead of just looking at a/s/l.

You want to teach me things or have adventures.

Yawgmoth
Sep 10, 2003

This post is cursed!

LeoMarr posted:

I legitimately enjoy Nickelback.
Deal breaker.

JakeP
Apr 27, 2003

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Lipstick Apathy
Sup plebs OK cupid just informed me that I am elite tier hotness

quote:

We just detected that you’re now among the most attractive people on OkCupid.

We learned this from clicks to your profile and reactions to you in Quickmatch. Did you get a new haircut or something? Well, it’s working!

To celebrate, we’ve adjusted your OkCupid experience:

You’ll see more attractive people in your results.

This won’t affect your match percentages, which are still based purely on your answers and desired match’s answers. But we’ll recommend more attractive people to you. You’ll also appear more often to other attractive people.

Sign in to see your newly-shuffled matches. Have fun, and don’t let this go to your head.


:smug:

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raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
I think everyone gets a slightly reshuffled version of that when they hit some mark of not using the site for X time or whatever.

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