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VagueRant
May 24, 2012
As an audiobook listener, I have ONLY just discovered that Detritus's weapon is written as the "piecemaker".

The only other one I know I missed was "gilt by association".

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Flipswitch
Mar 30, 2010


The best bit about re-reading Discworld book is playing spot the joke you missed previously. I'm on another burner through the Watch series and am thoroughly enjoying it despite being the 4th or 5th time I've read them all now.

VagueRant
May 24, 2012

SeanBeansShako posted:

Obviously I quite like the character Jackrum.
Okay, now that I have finished that book I can finally ask - that scary horror-movie face is meant to be Jackrum?! Why does it look like a nightmare monster that will eat me while laughing?

Gravitas Shortfall
Jul 17, 2007

Utility is seven-eighths Proximity.


VagueRant posted:

Okay, now that I have finished that book I can finally ask - that scary horror-movie face is meant to be Jackrum?! Why does it look like a nightmare monster that will eat me while laughing?

Monsterous Regiment posted:

The fire gleamed off Jackrum’s triumphal face. In the red glow his little dark eyes were like holes in space, his grinning mouth the gateway to a hell, his bulk some monster from the Abyss.
Poor old soldier, her father and his friends had sung, while frost formed on the window panes, poor old soldier! If ever I ‘list for a soldier again … the devil shall be my sergeant!
In the firelight the grin of Sergeant Jackrum was a crescent of blood, his coat the colour of a battlefield sky. ‘You are my little lads,’ he roared. ‘And I will look after you.’

VagueRant
May 24, 2012
Hah, that is the exact part that made me put a question mark when I described him as great. (The rest of the book answered the question that he was, indeed, great.)

Even so, the render looks far more evil than it should...to me at least.

SeanBeansShako
Nov 20, 2009

Now the Drums beat up again,
For all true Soldier Gentlemen.

VagueRant posted:

Okay, now that I have finished that book I can finally ask - that scary horror-movie face is meant to be Jackrum?! Why does it look like a nightmare monster that will eat me while laughing?

I got it from some female 3D modeling art students blog where she basically was practicing anatomy and during that she did a few Discworld characters. I assume she just skimmed through the book.

Also, yes I am using some of that quote above when I no longer need to link to that thread.

Liquid Communism
Mar 9, 2004

коммунизм хранится в яичках

sebmojo posted:

This is me too, though I got probated for saying that earlier in the thread, haha. Poor bugger just wasn't very good at writing in the latter stages of his illness :smith:

Less that and more that Pterry's writing style included exhaustive iterative revision. He couldn't do that anymore, and it shows in his later books, as they are a lot less polished.

Skippy McPants posted:

It was and excellent book! Pin and Tulip were some of Prachett's best heavies, with up there with Teatime and Carcer. Otto was an excellent addition to his menagerie of humanized monsters, and the dwarfs were good as they always are. The book covered civic and social bureaucracy, which was one of Prachett's strong suits (I maintain that the Vimes' rumination of the knife-edge operation of Ankh-Morpork in Night Watch is one of the best things he's ever written.)

William De Worde just wasn't a terribly... broad character. He like fancy words and hates his daddy, and that's about it. He was fine as the lead in a one-off, but he didn't really have enough arc to support multiple books. None of Moist's terminal thrill-hounding, Vimes' over-boiled cynicism or Tiffany's determination to fix every. single. thing.

The New Firm are even better if you're familiar with where they come from.

Gaiman's Neverwhere, to be precise, in the form of Mssrs. Croupe and Vandemar.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wIRE3Zuyyy4

Liquid Communism fucked around with this message at 21:54 on Aug 3, 2015

Bilirubin
Feb 16, 2014

The sanctioned action is to CHUG


Decided it was time to read another of these after a break. I went to the store to pick up the next in the Watch series, Jingo, but they were out so I got Reaper Man instead (I have read Mort). Wish me luck.

no broccoli please
Apr 20, 2007

no broccoli please you are nice here is a Nathaniel Hawthorne avatar
Reaper Man has been my favourite out of the 15 I've read so far, and where the title quote comes from. You won't be disappointed. Plus there are wizard shenanigans, which is fun too.

ConfusedUs
Feb 24, 2004

Bees?
You want fucking bees?
Here you go!
ROLL INITIATIVE!!





A friend of mine posted this on Facebook and it is amazing

http://i.imgur.com/5BH6WYw.jpg

I think my favorite is Vimes in pajamas with a dragon.

MikeJF
Dec 20, 2003




ConfusedUs posted:

A friend of mine posted this on Facebook and it is amazing

http://i.imgur.com/5BH6WYw.jpg

I think my favorite is Vimes in pajamas with a dragon.

That's awesome.

Though it reminds me that it always kinda bugged me that despite being so accurate most of the time, Kidby always gives the Watch sandals. Mainly because Vimes had a thing about his boots.

toasterwarrior
Nov 11, 2011

MikeJF posted:

That's awesome.

Though it reminds me that it always kinda bugged me that despite being so accurate most of the time, Kidby always gives the Watch sandals. Mainly because Vimes had a thing about his boots.

In fairness, Guards! Guards! did distinctly described the Watch as wearing sandals. Probably got new boots once Vetinari was convinced they would be an important part of A-M society at the end of that book.

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

MikeJF posted:

That's awesome.

Though it reminds me that it always kinda bugged me that despite being so accurate most of the time, Kidby always gives the Watch sandals. Mainly because Vimes had a thing about his boots.
They also wear sandals.

SeanBeansShako
Nov 20, 2009

Now the Drums beat up again,
For all true Soldier Gentlemen.
Oh my god I want all of them. All of them.

Kind of sad Polly or De Worde aren't there :smith:. Or the New Firm.

SeanBeansShako fucked around with this message at 16:58 on Aug 8, 2015

ConfusedUs
Feb 24, 2004

Bees?
You want fucking bees?
Here you go!
ROLL INITIATIVE!!





SeanBeansShako posted:

Oh my god I want all of them. All of them.

Kind of sad Polly or De Worde aren't there :smith:. Or the New Firm.

http://shop.microartstudio.com/discworld-miniatures-c-48.html

Snowmankilla
Dec 6, 2000

True, true


I am going to go broke.

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Agnes who? What? Nuts? What are you even talking about, that's not a real character.

MikeJF
Dec 20, 2003




toasterwarrior posted:

In fairness, Guards! Guards! did distinctly described the Watch as wearing sandals. Probably got new boots once Vetinari was convinced they would be an important part of A-M society at the end of that book.

Ah, okay, fair point.

ConfusedUs
Feb 24, 2004

Bees?
You want fucking bees?
Here you go!
ROLL INITIATIVE!!





Snowmankilla posted:

I am going to go broke.

I really would like to make a chess set out of these, but we're talking 32 figurines at 8-12 euros each. So it's not happening.

But man, I gotta have Vimes as the Queen for the A-M side.

stevey666
Feb 25, 2007
drat, I really want a Vetinari and a Vimesy. But they come unpainted :(.

Ika
Dec 30, 2004
Pure insanity

ConfusedUs posted:

I really would like to make a chess set out of these, but we're talking 32 figurines at 8-12 euros each. So it's not happening.

But man, I gotta have Vimes as the Queen for the A-M side.

The A-M side would have the patrician as the king and 15 pawns.

VagueRant
May 24, 2012
Here's my disagreeable rankings of the Discworld books so far for no particular reason:

Best of the best: Jingo, Night Watch, Monstrous Regiment
Great: Mort, Going Postal, Guards! Guards!
Good: The Truth, Small Gods, the rest of the Death series, almost the rest of the Watch series
Less good: Snuff. :smith:

And now I'm starting Equal Rites. Oh dear, it's got that very Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy silliness that was in Guards! Guards! and probably the earlier books, hopefully it too will pull through that. Also a female narrator, which is super unusual - though it cuts to a man for Death.

immediate edit: nah, had to bump up Guards! Guards!

Khizan
Jul 30, 2013


I thought Monstrous Regiment ended on a pretty weak note. I did not like the "OH EVERYBODY IN THE COMMAND IS A WOMAN" twist. Jackrum as a woman was good, I could buy one of the high command, but all of them? Meh.

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Khizan posted:

I thought Monstrous Regiment ended on a pretty weak note. I did not like the "OH EVERYBODY IN THE COMMAND IS A WOMAN" twist. Jackrum as a woman was good, I could buy one of the high command, but all of them? Meh.
It was one third, including the highest-ranking general.

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

I remember way too many details about these books.

rejutka
May 28, 2004

by zen death robot

Ika posted:

The A-M side would have the patrician as the king and 15 pawns.

Plus the other five you didn't notice.

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

"Huh gee I wonder how we could make a Discworld version of chess," he said, walking past a hardcover copy of Thud on his bookshelf.

Flipswitch
Mar 30, 2010


VagueRant posted:

Here's my disagreeable rankings of the Discworld books so far for no particular reason:

Best of the best: Jingo, Night Watch, Monstrous Regiment
Great: Mort, Going Postal, Guards! Guards!
Good: The Truth, Small Gods, the rest of the Death series, almost the rest of the Watch series
Less good: Snuff. :smith:

And now I'm starting Equal Rites. Oh dear, it's got that very Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy silliness that was in Guards! Guards! and probably the earlier books, hopefully it too will pull through that. Also a female narrator, which is super unusual - though it cuts to a man for Death.

immediate edit: nah, had to bump up Guards! Guards!
Man I dunno, I kinda think Feet of Clay needs to be up in the Great section at least. I absolutely love that book.

WORDS IN THE HEART CAN NOT BE TAKEN. :unsmith:

YggiDee
Sep 12, 2007

WASP CREW

FactsAreUseless posted:

"Huh gee I wonder how we could make a Discworld version of chess," he said, walking past a hardcover copy of Thud on his bookshelf.

To be fair it's already a thing.

Segway Rave
Dec 25, 2011

this is stanley barton he is the brother of the king and feels sad alot because other people don't like him much they say hes boring and not fun
There was another type in some book (men at arms, maybe? something with assassins) that was just chess but with two extra rows on each side that only an assassin piece could move through.

The Sin of Onan
Oct 11, 2012

And below,
watched by eyes of steel
we dreamt

ConfusedUs posted:

A friend of mine posted this on Facebook and it is amazing

http://i.imgur.com/5BH6WYw.jpg

I think my favorite is Vimes in pajamas with a dragon.

Man. Does anyone else kind of want to get Cohen and make him the general for a Chaos army? If I could be bothered playing/spending money on Warhammer these days, I would totally do that.

Pidmon
Mar 18, 2009

NO ONE risks painful injury on your GREEN SLIME GHOST POGO RIDE.

No one but YOU.

FactsAreUseless posted:

Agnes who? What? Nuts? What are you even talking about, that's not a real character.

She could easily have two, one as a witch-turned-dhampir and one as the female lead in phantom of the opera. :(

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

They have Cheery!

...

Needs a Formal Cheery, though--like from The Fifth Elephant (iirc), sequined axe cozy and all

VagueRant
May 24, 2012
Ranking talk got me looking up quotes from the Watch books. (Tragically formatted for TV Tropes)

quote:

Colon: Hright! This, men, is your truncheon, also nomenclatured your night stick or baton of office. Hand you will look after hit! You will eat with hit, you will sleep with hit, you —
Cuddy: 'Scuse me.
Colon: Who said that?
Cuddy: Down here. It's me, Lance-Constable Cuddy.
Colon: Yes, pilgrim?
Cuddy: How do we eat with it, sergeant?
Colon: What?
Cuddy: Well, do we use it as a knife or a fork or cut in half for chopsticks or what?
Colon: What are you talking about?
Angua: Excuse me, sergeant?
Colon: What is it, Lance-Constable Angua?
Angua: How exactly do we sleep with it, sir?
Colon: Well, I... I meant... Corporal Nobbs, stop that sniggering right now!

Trin Tragula
Apr 22, 2005

Let's have it properly, shall we? That whole scene deserves it; the narratorial interjections are pure artistry.

quote:

'Hright,' said Sergeant Colon, 'this, men, is your truncheon, also nomenclatured your night stick or baton of office.' He paused while he tried to remember his army days, and brightened up. 'Hand you will look after hit,' he shouted. 'You will eat with hit, you will sleep with hit, you—'
' 'Scuse me.'
'Who said that?'
'Down here. It's me, Lance-Constable Cuddy.'
'Yes, pilgrim?'
'How do we eat with it, sergeant?'
Sergeant Colon's wound-up machismo wound down. He was suspicious of Lance-Constable Cuddy. He strongly suspected Lance-Constable Cuddy was a trouble-maker.
'What?'
'Well, do we use it as a knife or a fork or cut in half for chopsticks or what?'
'What are you talking about?'
'Excuse me, sergeant?'
'What is it, Lance-Constable Angua?'
'How exactly do we sleep with it, sir?'
'Well, I . . . I meant . . . Corporal Nobbs, stop that sniggering right now!' Colon adjusted his breastplate and decided to strike out in a new direction.
'Now, hwat we have 'ere is a puppet, mommet or heffigy' – indicating a vaguely humanoid shape made of leather and stuffed with straw, mounted on a stake -'called by the hnickname of Harthur, weapons training, for the use hof. Forward, Lance-Constable Angua. Tell me, Lance-Constable, do you think you could kill a man?'
'How long will I have?'

There was a pause while they picked up Corporal Nobbs and patted him on the back until he settled down.
'Very well,' said Sergeant Colon, 'what you must do now is take your truncheon like so, and on the command one, proceed smartly to Harthur and on the command two, tap him smartly upon the bonce. Hwun . . . two . . .' The truncheon bounced off Arthur's helmet.
'Very good, only one thing wrong. Anyone tell me what it was?'
They shook their heads.
'From behind,' said Sergeant Colon. 'You hit 'em from behind. No sense in risking trouble, is there? Now you have a go, Lance-Constable Cuddy.'
'But sarge—'
'Do it.'
They watched.
'Perhaps we could fetch him a chair?' said Angua, after an embarrassing fifteen seconds.
Detritus sniggered.
'Him too little to be a guard,' he said.
Lance-Constable Cuddy stopped jumping up and down.
'Sorry, sergeant,' he said, 'this isn't how dwarfs do it, see?'
'It's how guards do it,' said Sergeant Colon. 'All right, Lance-Constable Detritus – don't salute – you give it a try.'
Detritus held the truncheon between what must technically be called thumb and forefinger, and smashed it over Arthur's helmet. He stared reflectively at the truncheon's stump. Then he bunched up his, for want of a better word, fist, and hammered Arthur over what was briefly its head until the stake was driven three feet into the ground.
'Now the dwarf, he can have a go,' he said.
There was another embarrassed five seconds. Sergeant Colon cleared his throat. 'Well, yes, I think we can consider him thoroughly apprehended,' he said. 'Make a note, Corporal Nobbs. Lance-Constable Detritus – don't salute! - deducted one dollar for loss of truncheon. And you're supposed to be able to ask 'em questions afterwards.'
He looked at the remains of Arthur.
'I think around about now is a good time to demonstrate the fine points of harchery,' he said.

I could read that all day, and indeed I have.

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Trin Tragula posted:

Let's have it properly, shall we? That whole scene deserves it; the narratorial interjections are pure artistry.


I could read that all day, and indeed I have.
You should learn to read faster.

VagueRant
May 24, 2012

Trin Tragula posted:

Let's have it properly, shall we? That whole scene deserves it; the narratorial interjections are pure artistry.
You're not wrong there!

Some other random lines I saw, some that are again tragically mis-formatted. I hope it's not too many to quote, I can edit or whatever.

quote:

"A person like you thinks that there are good men and bad men...There are, always and only, bad men - but some of them are on different sides."

On the Piecemaker:

quote:

“I hope you keep that thing maintained,” said Nobby. “Them things were a bugger for metal fatigue. Especially on the safety catch.”
“What are a safety catch?” said Detritus.
Everything went quiet.

quote:

Boffo: Have- have you got an appointment?
Carrot: I don't know. Have we got an appointment?
Nobby: I've got an iron ball with spikes on.
Carrot: That's a morningstar, Nobby.
Nobby: Is it?
Carrot: Yes. An appointment is an engagement between to see someone, while a morningstar is a large lump of metal used for viciously crushing skulls. It's important not to confuse the two, isn't it, Mr- ?
Boffo: Boffo, sir. But-
Carrot: So if you could perhaps run along and tell Dr Whiteface that we've got an iron ball with spi- What am I saying? I mean, without an appointment to see him? Please? Thank you.

quote:

Vimes: Then it's something we're not seeing, drat it! People are dead, Captain! Mrs. Easy's dead!
Carrot: Who, sir?
Vimes: You've never heard of her?
Carrot: Can't say that I have, sir. What did she use to do?
Vimes: Do? Nothing, I suppose. She just brought up nine kids in a couple of rooms you couldn't stretch out in and she sewed shirts for a tuppence an hour, every hour the bloody gods sent, and all she did was work and keep to herself and she is dead, Captain. And so's her grandson. Aged fourteen months. Because her granddaughter took them some grub from the palace! A bit of a treat for them! And d'you know what? Mildred thought I was going to arrest her for theft! At the drat funeral, for gods' sake! It's murder now. Not assassination, not politics, it's murder.
:smith:

quote:

Vimes: 'I've given that viewpoint a lot of thought, sir, and reached the following conclusion: arseholes to the lot of 'em, sir.'
The Patrician's hand covered his mouth for a moment.

quote:

Vetinari: Commander, I always used to consider that you had a definite anti-authoritarian streak in you.
Vimes: Sir?
Vetinari: It seems that you have managed to retain this even though you are authority.
Vimes: Sir?
Vetinari: That's practically Zen.

quote:

Prince Cadram: Well, Mr Samuel, when I raise my hand, the men behind me will cut you d-
71-Hour Ahmed: I will cut down the first man that moves.
Prince Cadram: Then the second man that moves will kill you, traitor!
Captain Carrot: (Drawing sword) They'll have to move very fast.
Commander Vimes: Any volunteers to be the third man? Anyone?

quote:

He wanted to go home. He wanted it so much that he trembled at the thought. But if the price of that was selling good men to the night, if the price was filling those graves, if the price was not fighting with every trick he knew... Then it was too high. History finds a way? Well, it would have to come up with something good, because it was up against Sam Vimes now.

There's so many Night Watch quotes beyond that. God, Vimes is so loving good.

Ccs
Feb 25, 2011


Has anyone read "The Long Earth" series by Terry Pratchett and Stephen Baxter? The premise is basically humans suddenly discover they can step into alternate parallel worlds without any humans in them, so they start colonizing these places and exploring and building new societies. But I just can't adjust to the premise that instead of corporations mining these worlds for resources and making humans very comfortable, a huge amount of the population decides to settle these new worlds like old-school pioneers; farming and making stuff like candles and tools from scratch.

C'mon, there's no way people are going to give up modern comforts to live like that. Why would they?

It would kill real estate prices though. I could build a nice house on Earth-2 in the middle of New York City and commute every day to Earth-1 NYC in one step.

withak
Jan 15, 2003


Fun Shoe
Well at one point departing to join the pioneer lifestyle became non-optional

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idonotlikepeas
May 29, 2010

This reasoning is possible for forums user idonotlikepeas!
For pretty much the same reasons they gave up creature comforts in the land grabs that happened in reality: because of the ability to own whatever the gently caress land they want and have whatever kind of government they want, combined with the lure of potentially cool poo poo out there.

The long game would end up with everyone having modern stuff anyway, though, because the technology to build all that infrastructure already exists. It just has to be gradually set up on the new earths.

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