TRUMP: holy FUCK its november 8th - The Something Awful Forums

Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > TRUMP: holy FUCK its november 8th

«‹›14088 »

Pavlov: Oct 21, 2012; I've long been fascinated with how the alt-right develops elaborate and obscure dog whistles to try to communicate their meaning without having to say it out loud
Stepan Andreyevich Bandera being the most prominent example of that

Dahbadu posted:

I wasn't watching, but random guess, I bet the audience laughed/chuckled at his casual light racism.

Edit:

Yeah, of course they laughed.

Look on the bright side, if it was my father, he would have done it in an offensive accent as well.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:21

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 11, 2024 11:00

Mitt Romney: Nov 9, 2005; dumb and bad

JHomer722 posted:

Jeb!'s conviction that treating hispanics like people will win him support among Republicans would be funny if it weren't so sad.

I think he's assuming he will win the nomination (a likely outcome) and that he's already working on the general election. Having +10 net favorable among Hispanics will benefit him greatly in the general.

If I recall correctly, at this time in 2007 no one even thought Obama had a chance at winning the nomination. A lot's going to change until 2016 and Trump isn't going to be on top by then.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:22

Pohl: Jan 28, 2005; In the future, please post shit with the sole purpose of antagonizing the person running this site. Thank you.

Dahbadu posted:

What's even crazier than Trump is that his publicly stated views, for the most part, are actually less crazy than what your standard Republican candidate thinks. Trump just sounds crazier than other Republicans, because not everything he says is couched behind dog whistles or whatever. I guess that's more sad than crazy, but there you go.

This is real and it will never stop cracking me up.
What scares me is that we are in a cycle where a Populist has this much impact with the electorate.
Trumps not scary scary, but someone else in the future may capture this energy, and they could be scary.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:23

Mr Ice Cream Glove: Apr 22, 2007

"When people you elect go to Washington they become impotent"

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:23

Devor: Nov 30, 2004; Lurking more.

Alter Ego posted:

Why on earth is Trump even running as a Republican? He could run just as easily as an Independent who just really loving hates Mexicans.

Welcome to the Republican Party

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:24

Pohl: Jan 28, 2005; In the future, please post shit with the sole purpose of antagonizing the person running this site. Thank you.

Devor posted:

Welcome to the Republican Party

gotta be on the ballot, man.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:27

Dahbadu: Aug 22, 2004; Reddit has helpfully advised me that I look like a "15 year old fortnite boi"

TEAYCHES posted:

same reason sanders is running as a democrat. independents get shut out by the nature of the two party political infrastructure

To add to your point, identity politics is very powerful. Running as an Independent would also result in the fear machine being pointed at him.

But really, he probably views himself as a Republican. He really is in touch with the base. In one of my first posts about Trump (like the day that he announced when almost everyone was calling him a joke) I argued that he was the Republican id made form, he didn't talk like a politician (which I felt would be really beneficial and it's turning out I was right), and to take him seriously.

Dahbadu fucked around with this message at 01:30 on Aug 26, 2015

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:28

Mr Ice Cream Glove: Apr 22, 2007

"I told CNN that if they don't pay 10 million to him in charity, he won't go to debate"

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:30

The X-man cometh: Nov 1, 2009

Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:

"I love the bible"

Listen, I love the bible, I respect it. It's great, but honestly, not the best book of all time. I wrote The Art of the Deal, after all. And this Jesus guy, what a loser. 20 pieces of silver? None of my disciples would betray me for anything less than 200 million pieces of gold.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:31

Dahn: Sep 4, 2004

Please make CNN pay 10 million to charity.

If this happens, I will so unironically vote for trump.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:31

Montasque: Jul 18, 2003; Living in a hateful world sending me straight to Heaven

How Donald Trump�s name wound up on a plane flying over the Mexican border

http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/post-politics/wp/2015/08/25/how-donald-trumps-name-wound-up-on-a-plane-flying-over-the-mexican-border/

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:33

Donovan Trip: Jan 6, 2007

"Go back to Univision"

Confirmed http://www.nbcnews.com/news/latino/donald-trump-anchor-jorge-ramos-go-back-univision-n416011

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:40

blue squares: Sep 28, 2007

Mitt Romney posted:

If I recall correctly, at this time in 2007 no one even thought Obama had a chance at winning the nomination. A lot's going to change until 2016 and Trump isn't going to be on top by then.

Jeb Bush is not Barack Obama.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:52

Gyges: Aug 4, 2004; NOW NO ONE
RECOGNIZE HULK

echronorian posted:

"Go back to Univision"

Confirmed http://www.nbcnews.com/news/latino/donald-trump-anchor-jorge-ramos-go-back-univision-n416011

Man, I kind of want every Trump press conference to include a section where Trump explains to Ramos what Hispanics really want.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 01:52

Dahn: Sep 4, 2004

echronorian posted:

"Go back to Univision"

Confirmed http://www.nbcnews.com/news/latino/donald-trump-anchor-jorge-ramos-go-back-univision-n416011

Alpha Male Donald Trump. Go back to Univision.

And....your done.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:00

Joementum: May 23, 2004; jesus christ

Abraham Trump's Gettysburg Address

quote:

Thanks. What an incredible crowd. They tell me this is the biggest crowd in the history of the North.

A while back some founders got together. And I mean they were good people but they really didn�t know anything about building a country. C�mon, you know, let�s face facts. Franklin with his little glasses and Washington with those horrible dentures � it was a nightmare. They didn�t know what the hell they were doing.

So then everyone comes to me and they say, �Please help us we�re in this terrible mess.� And believe me I knew this was gonna happen because our leaders were a total disaster who didn�t have a clue how to negotiate. Not the first clue, OK. It�s crazy. And I knew em all. Millard Filmore? The guy was a trainwreck. Franklin Pierce? A complete moron. Moron. And then James Buchanan they say dressed up like a woman if you can even believe it. I could tell you stories.

I mean they�re useless but I did business with �em because I�m a businessman. It�s what I do. I traded cotton. I traded tobacco. I built the biggest plantations in the world. In fact I�ll tell you a story. Jefferson Davis came to me and begged me � begged me to live on a beautiful plantation that I had built in Mississippi. And it was beautiful, everything top notch and luxurious. I mean not the slave cabins �cause they�re built for slaves. But everything was great and he�s pleading with me and what am I gonna say, �No�? So I sold it to him for an unbelievable profit. Largest profit ever made on a plantation sale. Hundreds of dollars in profit all pre-Confederate, which two centuries from now will be worth around $10 billion if maybe I decide to leave any to my kids. Who knows. We�ll see. And I say that not to brag just to give you an idea what�s what.

And by the way the slaves love me. Love me. The food portions. The amount of sleep. They�re nuts about me. If they end up freed when this is all over I will win the slave vote.

Anyway our politicians are the worst, they�re total failures and they didn�t let the South go bye bye and so I pick up the paper today and I read Salmon Chase may run against me in �64! This idiot is in my own cabinet. And I like my cabinet, most of them have terrible beards but they�re OK. They follow orders. First of all what kind of name is Salmon? Should be a harpooneer on a whaling ship with a name like that. So I thought to myself, Salmon Chase, isn�t he the guy who night and day pleaded for a job with me after I kicked his rear end at the convention in 1860? It was. I even found his telegraph number, give it a try see if it works. Dot dot dash dash dash dot dash dot dot dot dash.

And I can just hear the papers: �Abraham�s attacking again. He�s saying terrible things.� No. I say what I say because I�m honest. And I�m actually doing my job. Not like those nitwits in Washington. I mean I�m out here opening a cemetery for Christ sake! And as I look at this place I�m thinking, �How could there have been so many casualties?� There�s rocks and orchards all around, if I had the time I�d develop the property, but you can�t tell me that if you call yourself a soldier and you hear a shell or something coming you couldn�t have found a place to hide. And incidentally, so what, now Meade is some kind of a great general because he defeated Pickett�s charge? You�re up on a ridge with all your cannons and everything and the other army is walking right toward you. I mean they�re literally walking. Who couldn�t win that!

The point is I�m up all hours saving the Union and then here we are in this cemetery and I�m supposed to do what? Honor the dead? They�re dead. They�re losers. How are we in debt to them? I hate to tell you, but I like the guys who didn�t die. I�ll honor some of them.

And speaking of honoring, they want me to wrap up so they can honor me at a dinner. I�m so in demand it�s insanity half the time. All I�m telling you is if you�re living everything is for you.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:02

Patter Song: Mar 26, 2010; Hereby it is manifest that during the time men live without a common power to keep them all in awe, they are in that condition which is called war; and such a war as is of every man against every man.; Fun Shoe

Alter Ego posted:

Why on earth is Trump even running as a Republican? He could run just as easily as an Independent who just really loving hates Mexicans.

Because he wants to be President.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:08

Dahbadu: Aug 22, 2004; Reddit has helpfully advised me that I look like a "15 year old fortnite boi"

Dahn posted:

Alpha Male Donald Trump. Go back to Univision.

And....your done.

That exchange really did work out well for Trump. And if it keeps getting coverage like this, it will probably end up increasing/solidifying his popularity among GOP voters even more.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:08

Raskolnikov38: Mar 3, 2007; We were somewhere around Manila when the drugs began to take hold

Joementum posted:

Abraham Trump's Gettysburg Address

Kudos to the author for nailing salmon chase perfectly

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:10

Xenophon: Jun 28, 2003; by FactsAreUseless; Grimey Drawer

Joementum posted:

Abraham Trump's Gettysburg Address

this stone cold rules

I'm still wrapping my head around "WE WANT DEAL"

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:12

Mr Ice Cream Glove: Apr 22, 2007

In least shocking news: Jindal, Cruz and Carson have signed National Organization for Marriage pledge

quote:

The National Organization for Marriage (NOM) today identified four Republican presidential candidates they have dubbed "Marriage Champions" for having pledged to the American people that they will take several specific actions as president to restore marriage to the law and protect people of faith from discrimination because of their support for traditional marriage. NOM said that Sen. Ted, Cruz, Sen. Rick Santorum, Gov. Bobby Jindal and Dr. Ben Carson have emerged as the top candidates for marriage supporters.

�

1. Support a federal constitutional amendment that protects marriage as the union of one man and one woman.

2. Work to overturn the US Supreme Court's Obergefell decision that illegitimately imposed same-sex 'marriage' on every state in the nation, including nominating to the U.S. Supreme Court and federal bench judges who are committed to restraint and applying the original meaning of the Constitution, and appointing an attorney general similarly committed.

3. Conduct a review of actions taken by the Obama Administration that have undermined marriage and work to restore our policies to be consistent with the proper understanding of marriage as the union of one man and one woman. Consistent with this, prevent the promotion of a redefined version of marriage in public schools and other government entities.

4. Support the First Amendment Defense Act and other legislation that recognizes the right of organizations and individuals to act in the public square consistent with their belief that marriage is the union of one man and one woman without fear of retaliation from the government.

5. Direct the Department of Justice to investigate, document and publicize cases of Americans who have been harassed or threatened for exercising key civil rights to organize, to speak, to donate or to vote for marriage and to propose new protections, if needed.

"NOM has invited every candidate for president to sign our pledge, and we encourage those who have not yet signed to do so as soon as possible," Brown said. "We will not support a candidate for president who has not pledged to the American people to take specific actions in support of restoring marriage to our law and protecting people from government discrimination over their beliefs that marriage is the union of one man and one woman." - See more at: http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/cruz-carson-and-jindal-pledge-end-promotion-gay-marriage-public-schools#sthash.Isz6tD2h.dpuf

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:17

Dahn: Sep 4, 2004

Ramos was owned by Trump, hard.

Do you want a fukin job, vote for Trump.

Do you want to stand in a line for a hand out, vote for whatever weak sauce candidate the democrats put up.

I have a bigger heart then you do.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:20

Shinjobi: Jul 10, 2008; Gravy Boat 2k

Marriage Champion sounds like some DBZ-level poo poo. :ssj:

:ssj:

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:20

Lastgirl: Sep 7, 1997; Good Morning!
Sunday Morning!

drone strike illegal border immigrants

problem solved

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:23

Joementum: May 23, 2004; jesus christ

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:23

Grand Theft Autobot: Feb 28, 2008; I'm something of a fucking idiot myself

echronorian posted:

"Go back to Univision"

Confirmed http://www.nbcnews.com/news/latino/donald-trump-anchor-jorge-ramos-go-back-univision-n416011

To be fair, the guy works for Univision.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:27

Joementum: May 23, 2004; jesus christ

Quote of the night, "I think about them myself." ~ Donald Trump, when asked if he writes his own tweets.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:27

Donovan Trip: Jan 6, 2007

Grand Theft Autobot posted:

To be fair, the guy works for Univision.

Oh this is easy for him to spin to his audience but the media matters crowd is making GBS threads their pants with rage right now, those are the things I come around for

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:28

Samurai Sanders: Nov 4, 2003; Pillbug

Joementum posted:

Quote of the night, "I think about them myself." ~ Donald Trump, when asked if he writes his own tweets.

That's an oddly cagey answer, just because of the preposition choice.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:29

Silly Burrito: Nov 27, 2007; SET A COURSE FOR
THE FLAVOR QUADRANT

Pohl posted:

This is real and it will never stop cracking me up.
What scares me is that we are in a cycle where a Populist has this much impact with the electorate.
Trumps not scary scary, but someone else in the future may capture this energy, and they could be scary.

Trump is Greg Stillson.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:31

A GIANT PARSNIP: Apr 13, 2010; Too much fuckin' eggnog

His twitter account rapidly firing off messages at 2:30 AM is definitely him, but I can also see him saying a trolling quip about Jeb! or whoever and telling some staffer near him to go put that quip into a tweet.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:33

Third World Reagan: May 19, 2008; Imagine four 'mechs waiting in a queue. Time works the same way.

here you go joe, another for your feed

https://twitter.com/trumpasanime

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:34

Jonked: Feb 15, 2005

It's funny how scared people are getting about Trump, when it's obvious how this is going to go down. You guys even said it in this thread: the only thing that can derail Trump is showing weakness. Well, what do you think is going to happen in Iowa? If he gets the most delegates, he's fine. He comes in second, he hurting. He loses in Iowa, NH? He is done. Trump the loser, back to being a reality TV joke. He's on top now because name recognition put him at the top of the polls, and because topping the polls made him the front runner, and the frontrunner can't be a joke. But Trump's magic doesn't work when he's not being taken serious. No one like a loud mouth loser.

But wait, you say. Why do I think he's losing Iowa? Jesus pay attention - his ground game is pouching Perry's rejects, his endorsements are kkk grand wizards, and half the people in the polls are 'voting' for him because he's the only name they recognize. His support is as soft as his booze-soaked dick, and it's not going to survive the marathon session of the Iowa caucus. It's one thing to say "I'm voting for Trump" to a voice on the phone - saying it to your neighbors face, after arguing over everyone's choice for an hour, as a serious citizen of the US? Trump loses to Walker, JEB!, and Carson.

If Trump loses Iowa he's a loser, and America hates a loser.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:35

Third World Reagan: May 19, 2008; Imagine four 'mechs waiting in a queue. Time works the same way.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ooeaHyoiLE

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:35

Anal Papist: Jun 2, 2011

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w87StHeTQR4

Where does this joker think he is a Bernie Sanders rally?

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:36

Devor: Nov 30, 2004; Lurking more.

Third World Reggin posted:

here you go joe, another for your feed

https://twitter.com/trumpasanime

I wanted Trump as a mime

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:36

A GIANT PARSNIP: Apr 13, 2010; Too much fuckin' eggnog

Jonked posted:

It's funny how scared people are getting about Trump, when it's obvious how this is going to go down. You guys even said it in this thread: the only thing that can derail Trump is showing weakness. Well, what do you think I'd going to happen in Iowa? If he gets the most delegates, he's fine. He comes in second, he hurting. He loses in Iowa, NH? He is done. Trump the loser, back to being a reality TV joke. He's on top now because name recognition put him at the top of the polls, and because topping the polls made him the front runner, and the frontrunner can't be a joke. But Trump's magic doesn't work when he's not being taken serious. No one like a loud mouth loser.

But wait, you say. Why do I think he's losing Iowa? Jesus pay attention - his ground game is pouching Perry's rejects, his endorsements are kkk grand wizards, and half the people in the polls are 'voting' for him because he's the only name they recognize. His support is as soft as his booze-soaked dick, and it's not going to survive the marathon session of the Iowa caucus. It's one thing to say "I'm voting for Trump" to a voice on the phone - saying it to your neighbors face, after arguing over everyone's choice for an hour, as a serious citizen of the US? Trump loses to Walker, JEB!, and Carson.

If Trump loses Iowa he's a loser, and America hates a loser.

If he pulls off a win in IA or NH he can crow about coming in and stealing a state from the "real" politicians. Hell, if IA and NH go to different candidates and he pulls a strong second in both he can still crow about how well he's doing.

But yeah if someone sweeps IA and NH and Trump doesn't have a strong showing he's just gonna quit.

And if he wins both IA and NH he's literally going to troll some of the other candidates to death.

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:39

Joementum: May 23, 2004; jesus christ

We're back to pretending Trump is going to win Iowa?

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:40

kitten emergency: Jan 13, 2008; get meow this wack-ass crystal prison

Joementum posted:

We're back to pretending Trump is going to win Iowa?

goons are really bad at political analysis

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:43

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 11, 2024 11:00

Oil!: Nov 5, 2008; Der's e'rl in dem der hills!; Ham Wrangler

Third World Reggin posted:

here you go joe, another for your feed

https://twitter.com/trumpasanime

# ? Aug 26, 2015 02:43

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > TRUMP: holy FUCK its november 8th

«‹›14088 »

Powered by: vBulletin Version 2.2.9 (SABB-v2.24.05)
Copyright ©2000, 2001, Jelsoft Enterprises Limited.
Copyright ©2024, Jeffrey of YOSPOS