just got a job as a retard masturbator

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > just got a job as a retard masturbator

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white mans burping: Feb 24, 2015

why isnt this thread godlmine

# ? Jun 30, 2015 10:35

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 14, 2024 13:54

Woof Blitzer: Dec 29, 2012; [-]

The OP works from home.

# ? Jun 30, 2015 10:39

EasternBronze: Jul 19, 2011; I registered for the Selective Service! I'm also racist as fuck!

Don't forget to ignore me!

Voted five, thread delivers.

At the same time though... :stonklol:

# ? Jun 30, 2015 10:55

haris pilton: Sep 4, 2014

Hey op, if you think you got it bad try giving blowjobs to hobos.
I HATE my job.
my job blows.

# ? Jun 30, 2015 10:58

Hypha: Sep 13, 2008

Have my 5 alone, OP.

# ? Jun 30, 2015 11:10

Cactus Ghost: Dec 20, 2003; you can actually inflate your scrote pretty safely with sterile saline, syringes, needles, and aseptic technique. its a niche kink iirc

the saline just slowly gets absorbed into your blood but in the meantime you got a big round smooth distended nutsack

Slugnoid posted:

:iamafag:

# ? Jun 30, 2015 19:47

The Protagonist: Jun 29, 2009; The average is 5.5? I thought it was 4. This is very unsettling.

a good ressurection

# ? Jun 30, 2015 19:50

let it mellow: Jun 1, 2000; Dinosaur Gum

powerofrecall posted:

so you work from home op?

# ? Jun 30, 2015 19:57

Cursed Lumberjack: Nov 14, 2006; A rather unfortunate logger indeed.

haris pilton posted:

Hey op, if you think you got it bad try giving blowjobs to hobos.
I HATE my job.
my job blows.

at least you get lots of experience for when you're an aging man on a fixed income in an old house and need to be handy

# ? Jun 30, 2015 20:12

LethalGeek: Nov 4, 2009

People bitch about mods probating idiots but never bring up legit issues like this thread not being gold mined. Get it together mods :colbert:

# ? Jun 30, 2015 23:39

ClothHat: Mar 2, 2005; ASK ME ABOUT MY LOVE OF THE LUMPEN-GOBLITARIAT
protip: trust no links I post

Code Jockey posted:

lmao that's right, this thread

# ? Jun 30, 2015 23:55

RaySmuckles: Oct 14, 2009; Grimey Drawer

powerofrecall posted:

so you work from home op?

# ? Jul 1, 2015 00:04

tangy yet delightful: Sep 13, 2005

LethalGeek posted:

People bitch about mods probating idiots but never bring up legit issues like this thread not being gold mined. Get it together mods

Worse than the holocaust.

# ? Jul 1, 2015 00:30

Vincent Van Goatse: Nov 8, 2006; Enjoy every sandwich.; Smellrose

LethalGeek posted:

People bitch about mods probating idiots but never bring up legit issues like this thread not being gold mined. Get it together mods

this

close thread or goldmine

# ? Jul 1, 2015 00:41

Frog Act: Feb 10, 2012

this thread gave me platinum but i know it wasn't me who made it great.

# ? Jul 1, 2015 00:43

Cursed Lumberjack: Nov 14, 2006; A rather unfortunate logger indeed.

Frog Act posted:

this thread gave me platinum but i know it wasn't me who made it great.

go have a wank, ,you deserve it after all this

# ? Jul 1, 2015 00:46

Glorgnole: Oct 23, 2012

powerofrecall posted:

so you work from home op?

# ? Jul 1, 2015 01:07

Commie NedFlanders: Mar 8, 2014

powerofrecall posted:

so you work from home op?

# ? Jul 1, 2015 01:26

Phobophilia: Apr 26, 2008; by Hand Knit

i knew someone would make this thread hilarious but and im glad i wasnt wrong

# ? Jul 1, 2015 01:39

EugeneJ: Feb 5, 2012; by FactsAreUseless

How has this not been goldmined

# ? Jul 1, 2015 01:42

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

can someone tell me waht firstposter sir john feelgood said it most certainly was not the burn that 3rd post was but perhaps we could have him edit in something based on our choosing that could rival it though more likely just a retroactive posting of the third post

# ? Jul 1, 2015 02:37

Rhizoids: Jul 4, 2009; by Ralp

s-so... uh.. o-op. d-d... dyou, uh work f-form h-heh. fro-from home?
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA :owned:

:iwned:
SICK BURN

# ? Jul 1, 2015 02:48

Hobohemian: Sep 30, 2005; by XyloJW

Rhizoids posted:

s-so... uh.. o-op. d-d... dyou, uh work f-form h-heh. fro-from home?
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA :iwned:
SICK BURN

Maybe you can see if he takes clients incall.

# ? Jul 1, 2015 02:56

Waterbed Wendy: Jan 29, 2009

powerofrecall posted:

so you work from home op?

# ? Jul 1, 2015 02:59

Rhizoids: Jul 4, 2009; by Ralp

Hobohemian posted:

Maybe you can see if he takes clients incall.

Lol u got me bro

# ? Jul 1, 2015 03:00

supernatural blonde: Mar 15, 2005; Lipstick Apathy

Frog Act posted:

http://i.imgur.com/CvzCTV1.gifv

What is the context here? I'm scared :ohdear:

# ? Jul 1, 2015 03:02

let it mellow: Jun 1, 2000; Dinosaur Gum

Rhizoids posted:

s-so... uh.. o-op. d-d... dyou, uh work f-form h-heh. fro-from home?
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA :iwned:
SICK BURN

retard sensitivity itt

# ? Jul 1, 2015 03:29

let it mellow: Jun 1, 2000; Dinosaur Gum

gold mine or bust!

# ? Jul 1, 2015 03:30

Burt Sexual: Jan 26, 2006; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS; Switchblade Switcharoo

Gold before more retards masturbate.

# ? Jul 1, 2015 03:38

whip: Apr 9, 2007; by Lowtax

There is a guy with memory issues that can't remember hiring a sex worker on there. What the gently caress. :lol:

# ? Jul 1, 2015 03:40

Cursed Lumberjack: Nov 14, 2006; A rather unfortunate logger indeed.

whip posted:

There is a guy with memory issues that can't remember hiring a sex worker on there. What the gently caress.

nah hes just faking to get a two for one deal

# ? Jul 1, 2015 04:48

satanic splash-back: Jan 28, 2009

Code Jockey posted:

lmao that's right, this thread

# ? Jul 1, 2015 04:51

i was reloading: Aug 15, 2015; by zen death robot

powerofrecall posted:

so you work from home op?

# ? Jul 1, 2015 04:58

white mans burping: Feb 24, 2015

Hobohemian posted:

Maybe you can see if he takes clients incall.

# ? Jul 1, 2015 05:11

Antifa Spacemarine: Jan 11, 2011; Tzeentch can suck it.

Why don't they just euthanize these miserable fuckers?

# ? Jul 1, 2015 05:21

WAMPA_STOMPA: Oct 21, 2010

Shaman Ooglaboogla posted:

Why don't they just euthanize these miserable fuckers?

--hitler

# ? Jul 1, 2015 05:43

RISCy Business: Jun 17, 2015; bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork; Fun Shoe