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Mexican Deathgasm posted:Yeah goons, stop putting in effort to try to provide original, funny content directly related to the thread topic. Just complain instead like super cool forums poster Neo_Crimson. Shrimp and scallops 
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Sep 16, 2015 14:50
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OutsideAngel posted:These fast food "trip reports" just lack any sort of novelty or interest. Eating two pieces of lovely fried chicken plus some cheese food and bacon and yellow sauce is something I see people do every day. Problem is that cash crab did one, and we got half a page of praise that followed, so there will be more. It's too hyperbolic to be funny, so it comes across as the writer just being sort of pathetic. Cheaply made food sure is gross, but we're not talking about poison here.
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Sep 16, 2015 15:09
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Yeah, let's get some actual abominations in here. Like following a simply sara recipe, now that would warrant the spontaneous sterilization (or diabetes). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4zw99VsoMA
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Sep 16, 2015 15:19
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I should have quoted the post I was responding to. It would have helped put what I was trying to say in context. I'm not criticizing the hyperbolic trip reports. Cash crab said she had a dull pain near her ovaries after eating that greasy chicken mess and the other guy had his leg fall asleep after eating a bowl of gross slop. And I was thinking, yeah you're going to feel bad after eating that poo poo. I tried one of those Diablo hamburgers from Carl's a few months ago and while it tasted ok and was made from ingredients that people eat everyday, it upset my stomach and made me feel lethargic for the next four hours. If you can eat this stuff on a regular basis and not get horrible heartburn then I guess you've got a stronger constitution than I do.
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Sep 16, 2015 15:58
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Tiggum posted:So, none? Because if eating that causes you cramps, gastrointestinal distress, whatever other bullshit people claim fast food does to them, you are actually suffering from a serious medical issue. That food that ordinary people eat every day didn't do that to you. I have actual digestive problems, and even I would be able to knock out a Famous Bowl without issue. I actually want to try. I like fast food. Maybe this EXPLAINS the digestive problems. Or maybe just cuz I'm Scottish 
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Sep 16, 2015 15:58
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No one is suicidal enough to make a Simply Sara recipe.
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Sep 16, 2015 16:01
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Sodium Chloride posted:No one is suicidal enough to make a Simply Sara recipe. We're goons. There's someone among us weak and suicidal enough to do it.
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Sep 16, 2015 16:02
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Goons getting mad about people making fun of their regular diet foods ITT.
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Sep 16, 2015 16:11
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What was the pasta salad calorie count? It's been years, but that feels like something that someone would remember. Also fast food crew
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Sep 16, 2015 17:09
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zandert33 posted:It's too hyperbolic to be funny, so it comes across as the writer just being sort of pathetic. This is what I meant. Trip reports are fine, but people make it seem like it's some harrowing experience complete with fancy prose describing it all. Just tone it down a notch, it sounds really overwrought and pretentious.
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Sep 16, 2015 17:24
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Neo_Crimson posted:This is what I meant. Trip reports are fine, but people make it seem like it's some harrowing experience complete with fancy prose describing it all. Just tone it down a notch, it sounds really overwrought and pretentious. It's a style of humor and you either don't like it or don't get it. It's okay though. It's okay.
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Sep 16, 2015 17:59
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if you find these trip reports funny, god's sake, listen to some loving jokes at some point in your life
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Sep 16, 2015 19:04
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i ate at mcdonalds once and my flesh started to slough off, my arms reduced to a mess of meat and bone just from holding that fetid "burger" in my hand and then i literally died
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Sep 16, 2015 19:13
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FlyinPingu posted:i ate at mcdonalds once and my flesh started to slough off, my arms reduced to a mess of meat and bone just from holding that fetid "burger" in my hand 
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Sep 16, 2015 19:18
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I went to McDonald's and got a burger. It looked smashed as hell, but it tasted alright. Fries were a little salty. Welp that's my new improved trip report for whiny thread babies, hope you liked it.
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Sep 16, 2015 19:22
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Neo_Crimson posted:This is what I meant. Trip reports are fine, but people make it seem like it's some harrowing experience complete with fancy prose describing it all. Just tone it down a notch, it sounds really overwrought and pretentious. If you take dumb joke posts this seriously, you might not be cut out for PYF.
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Sep 16, 2015 19:40
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Crust First posted:I went to McDonald's and got a burger. It looked smashed as hell, but it tasted alright. Fries were a little salty. The last time I went to a mcdonalds a woman sauntered in, kicked the door to the men's washroom and screamed "I'M HUNGRY, WHO WANTS THEIR DICK SUCKED?!" The cashier couldn't leave his post and do anything about it because a homeless man was at the counter begging him to suck his dick out back inbetween calling him a "loving human being." Burger sucked but I couldn't blame the guy for it.
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Sep 16, 2015 19:42
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Some people just have to be pedantic fuckers. BRB, gas station microwave burrito trip report in the style of the Revelations of St. John the Apostle as translated by Charles Dickens and Michael Bay in the works. e. Or J.R.R. Tolkien and Laurell K. Hamilton, or Hunter S. Thompson and a small collection of Norwegian power metal songwriters. I haven't made my mind up yet. rndmnmbr has a new favorite as of 19:52 on Sep 16, 2015 |
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Sep 16, 2015 19:46
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With enough practice those trip reports will be written in an engaging manner and people will stop bitchingrndmnmbr posted:BRB, gas station microwave burrito trip report in the style of the Revelations of St. John the Apostle This would probably be pretty good fyi DJ Fuckboy Supreme has a new favorite as of 20:30 on Sep 16, 2015 |
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Sep 16, 2015 20:27
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Neo_Crimson posted:This is what I meant. Trip reports are fine, but people make it seem like it's some harrowing experience complete with fancy prose describing it all. Just tone it down a notch, it sounds really overwrought and pretentious. Why don't you post some content then.
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Sep 16, 2015 20:33
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And when I opened the seal on the green chile and bean burrito with "New Fresh Flavor!", the voice of the fourth beast did say "Come and see!" And I looked, and beheld a white tortilla, and he who sat on the tortilla was named Gastrointestinal Discomfort, and diarrhea followed after. And power was given unto it over the fourth part of my bowels, to kill with flatulence, and gall-bladder discomfort, and anal leakage, and fire from my hole. And lo, there was thunder made upon my throne, and a earthquake followed, and a third of the bowl became browned as a sackcloth of hair, and my anus leaked blood.
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Sep 16, 2015 20:41
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rndmnmbr posted:And when I opened the seal on the green chile and bean burrito with "New Fresh Flavor!", the voice of the fourth beast did say "Come and see!" And I looked, and beheld a white tortilla, and he who sat on the tortilla was named Gastrointestinal Discomfort, and diarrhea followed after. And power was given unto it over the fourth part of my bowels, to kill with flatulence, and gall-bladder discomfort, and anal leakage, and fire from my hole. And lo, there was thunder made upon my throne, and a earthquake followed, and a third of the bowl became browned as a sackcloth of hair, and my anus leaked blood. 
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Sep 16, 2015 20:48
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rndmnmbr posted:And when I opened the seal on the green chile and bean burrito with "New Fresh Flavor!", the voice of the fourth beast did say "Come and see!" And I looked, and beheld a white tortilla, and he who sat on the tortilla was named Gastrointestinal Discomfort, and diarrhea followed after. And power was given unto it over the fourth part of my bowels, to kill with flatulence, and gall-bladder discomfort, and anal leakage, and fire from my hole. And lo, there was thunder made upon my throne, and a earthquake followed, and a third of the bowl became browned as a sackcloth of hair, and my anus leaked blood. Amazing, amazing More please
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Sep 16, 2015 20:52
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I'm sure it's been posted before in this mess of a thread, but I just randomly thought of these old videos and figured they should be posted. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIu3FHvmHh0 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtvaX5rNEA4 It's somebody following some Sandra Lee recipes to the letter and explaining why they're stupid
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Sep 16, 2015 21:08
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Oh my goodness I miss Sandra Lee. I think there used to be a thread dedicated entirely to her here in PYF. I used to get really drunk and watch her videos for hours on end. It's like I was there in her kitchen with her, drinking all-liquor cocktail after all-liquor cocktail.  fake edit: "aquorium" real edit: no bake love cake! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OOSAgsfeppU LITERALLY A BIRD has a new favorite as of 21:19 on Sep 16, 2015 |
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Sep 16, 2015 21:10
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For some reason I was watching the Simply Sara videos a few weeks ago. Apparently she took like a year off for health problems. I can only assume it was a minor heart attack or diabetes.
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Sep 16, 2015 21:28
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Wanamingo posted:I'm sure it's been posted before in this mess of a thread, but I just randomly thought of these old videos and figured they should be posted. In a similar vein, Eater has started a series of Real Chefs Cook Dumb Recipes: Hugh Acheson Made Nachos From Kris Jenner's Cookbook So You Don't Have To Hugh Acheson Takes a Fantastic Voyage, Cooks Coolio's 'Pimp My Shrimp' The Trump Family's Strawberry Dumplings Recipe Made by Real Chef Ilan Hall
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Sep 16, 2015 21:28
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http://www.amazon.com/Spam-Teriyaki-Flavored-12oz-Pack/dp/B00JDWVQX6/ref=sr_1_1?rps=1&ie=UTF8&qid=1442436225&sr=8-1&keywords=teriyaki+spam description in url
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Sep 16, 2015 21:51
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TBH, ,my leg was really numb. Probably because I was sitting on a rock, and had it tucked under me.
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Sep 16, 2015 22:00
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Plinkey posted:For some reason I was watching the Simply Sara videos a few weeks ago. Apparently she took like a year off for health problems. I can only assume it was a minor heart attack or diabetes. Pneumonia. She had to be put on one of those weird inverted rotating beds so she didn't drown on her own fluids. Surely it had nothing to do with her weight. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYxTbPhmTL0
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Sep 17, 2015 01:28
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The White Dragon posted:http://www.amazon.com/Spam-Teriyaki-Flavored-12oz-Pack/dp/B00JDWVQX6/ref=sr_1_1?rps=1&ie=UTF8&qid=1442436225&sr=8-1&keywords=teriyaki+spam It's...not terrible.
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Sep 17, 2015 01:42
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Cavenagh posted:In a similar vein, Eater has started a series of Real Chefs Cook Dumb Recipes: "If you're ever going to memorialise someone who was brutally murdered, I think it's through their nachos" Amazing.
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Sep 17, 2015 03:00
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rndmnmbr posted:And when I opened the seal on the green chile and bean burrito with "New Fresh Flavor!", the voice of the fourth beast did say "Come and see!" And I looked, and beheld a white tortilla, and he who sat on the tortilla was named Gastrointestinal Discomfort, and diarrhea followed after. And power was given unto it over the fourth part of my bowels, to kill with flatulence, and gall-bladder discomfort, and anal leakage, and fire from my hole. And lo, there was thunder made upon my throne, and a earthquake followed, and a third of the bowl became browned as a sackcloth of hair, and my anus leaked blood. 
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Sep 17, 2015 03:04
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rndmnmbr posted:Some people just have to be pedantic fuckers. Here I was, just reading this thread and chuckling or grimacing now and again like any goon... but. Really? Of all the threads I would have imagined, I would have never thought it would be this one to mention that disgusting creature... I mean, Laurell K. Hamilton??? Are you ready for this poo poo? Are you ready for 200+ pages of how she hosed that slutty were-burrito and how it loved how she ate it bite by gory bite and eventually begged her to eat it forever while no actual plot happens and then WHOA HELLO the book is already over? Stay tuned for the next installation of how she magically fucks the were-burritos' brother, the were-burger!!! Trap sprung. I don't even give a gently caress because that woman is poo poo, she is a shittastic author and everyone should loving know. She is the personification of the worst food item of this thread. Shiny corn-laden slop wife material, gonna raise some dead guys to serve the appetizers, then gently caress everything in range, nothing is safe, not even the garnish. Especially not the garnish, it would submissively beg her to gently caress and cuck it.
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Sep 17, 2015 03:58
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Yolo Swaggins Esq posted:"If you're ever going to memorialise someone who was brutally murdered, I think it's through their nachos" No love for "The other glove is in the driveway"
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Sep 17, 2015 04:15
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empty sea posted:Here I was, just reading this thread and chuckling or grimacing now and again like any goon... but. Now we're talking.
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Sep 17, 2015 04:15
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empty sea posted:Here I was, just reading this thread and chuckling or grimacing now and again like any goon... but. So beany, burrito, so beany and cheesy... (A food based paraphrase of why I stopped the Anita Blake books (which were awesome when they first started)).
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Sep 17, 2015 04:17
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TRIP REPORT Results: I made this and ate it and regret it
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Sep 17, 2015 04:34
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RJWaters2 posted:TRIP REPORT Probably 'cause of the olives, olives are gross
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Sep 17, 2015 04:41
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RJWaters2 posted:TRIP REPORT Perfect.
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Sep 17, 2015 04:41
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