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Coolness Averted
Feb 20, 2007

oh don't worry, I can't smell asparagus piss, it's in my DNA

GO HOGG WILD!
🐗🐗🐗🐗🐗

notZaar posted:

Just stand around in the same room as them.

Is there an app for that?

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Lutha Mahtin
Oct 10, 2010

Your brokebrain sin is absolved...go and shitpost no more!

DreamShipWrecked posted:

We honestly are just looking for more people to hit bars with or whatever without picking up "bar people", I am just surprised at the outpouring of sexual response. I guess I just am delusional and innocent and thought that a app focused more on friendships would be not as bad

meetup.com? people make groups on there for different hobbies and stuff. or you could join a local civic organization or something

Wicker Man
Sep 5, 2007

Just like Columbus...


Clapping Larry

Lutha Mahtin posted:

meetup.com? people make groups on there for different hobbies and stuff. or you could join a local civic organization or something

Sounds boring, no hot chicks would go to that.

Kazvall
Mar 20, 2009

Groovelord Neato posted:

the penis is evil the gun is good.

zardoz... the.. wizard.. of oz.... ?!

Shumagorath
Jun 6, 2001

quote:

My self-summary
Also polyamorous and consider myself pansexual, more than bisexual.

Polyamorous means I partake in multiple relationships at a time. Some are serious, some are not.

I'll sometimes reply slow, so be patient with me.

----

Hello! My name is <withheld> and I'm not entirely sure what my intent is, back on this site, last time my experiences were dull at best.

I'd describe myself as sex and kink positive, a feminist, and I love having discussions about such things. You know, respectfully.

In my spare time I'm a pretty dedicated gamer; my favourite hobby being LARPing. I play multiple across <withheld>. I love board games, making things with my hands, and strong drinks.

Aside from that, Pokemon is like, my favourite thing. I have a pokemon tattoo, I'll let you guess of what and where.

What I知 doing with my life
Burlesque performer, trying to find ways to sell the crafts I produce. Basically at multiple crossroads.

I知 really good at
Writing is my main queen, but costuming is up there. Special effects make up, baking, crafting, pinterest inspired home decor.

The first things people usually notice about me
I'm very upbeat and enjoy being happy above much else. I'm a super extrovert and in love with attention and meeting/experiencing new people.

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books:

Currently devouring anything occult based I can get my hands on.

Music:

Nicki Minaj is the love of my life.

Tegan and Sara, Imagine Dragons, Porcelain Black, Woodkid, Kesha, Lady Gaga, Emilie Autumn, Mumford and Sons, Ani Defranco, Black Lab, Angel Haze.

Movies/shows:

Star Trek(New and Old), Sherlock, Doctor Who, American Horror Story, Venture Brothers, Young Justice, Justice League, Flash Point Paradox, Fight Club, Ninth Gate.

Food:

Sushi, Pizza, tea, bubbletea, lattes. I loving love chai lattes. Bagels, olives, chocolate, ice cream.

The six things I could never do without
Lattes
Thigh high socks
Bright colours
Summer dresses
Spaaace. Not like stars and poo poo, though that's cool, I mean like personal space.
Copious amounts of headphones.

On a typical Friday night I am
Frantically last minute packing for larp, out dancing, or on tumblr.

You should message me if
If you're into LARPing, or other kinds of Roleplay games.

If you wanna talk hot steamy feminism

If you want my 3DS friend code

If you like all these things AND sushi and/or pizza.

ALSO if you have more to say than just "hey" or "Whats up" or "You're sexy".

facebook jihad
Dec 18, 2007

by R. Guyovich
Am I a prude or is it weird that people would first start describing themselves as 'sex and kink positive'? Doesn't really seem like the first thing I'd want to be primarily known for.

Shumagorath
Jun 6, 2001


"It's unacceptable that you can do math!"

toggle
Nov 7, 2005


grow up lady

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


i'll never understand the "not here for hookups" on an app where ur solely judged on your appearance.

dogstile
May 1, 2012

fucking clocks
how do they work?

Exactly what I expected. Although I also expected dyed hair.

Yawgmoth
Sep 10, 2003

This post is cursed!

Shumagorath posted:



"It's unacceptable that you can do math!"
I don't want to be with someone who has basic pattern recognition skills.

Lufiron
Nov 24, 2005

Groovelord Neato posted:

i'll never understand the "not here for hookups" on an app where ur solely judged on your appearance.

they've been hooking up for so long, they're now desperate but have no idea on how to meet people outside of that method

Shumagorath
Jun 6, 2001

dogstile posted:

Exactly what I expected. Although I also expected dyed hair.
At least one other pic had dyed hair and one was some really good cosplay.

Turkey Farts
Jan 4, 2013

I goddamn hate Vermont

Lufiron
Nov 24, 2005
I used to live in vergennes

wet it up dude

cmndstab
May 20, 2006

Huge Internet Celebrity!

dogstile posted:

Exactly what I expected. Although I also expected dyed hair.

Her hair is two completely different colours here so you're probably right about her dying it.

Owlbear Camus
Jan 3, 2013

Maybe this guy that flies is just sort of passing through, you know?





do not my friends become addicted to tinder

computer parts
Nov 18, 2010

PLEASE CLAP

quote:

My self-summary

Hi, I'm Megan Love. That's All You Need To Know. Any Other Questions Talk To Me.

What I知 doing with my life

Currently Trying To Pursue Music.

I知 really good at

Singing I Would Like To Say. As Well As Being An Over All Philanthropist.

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food

Currently I Am Reading The 50 Shades Series. Haha I Know I'm Late.

The six things I could never do without

Music
Family
Friends
Religion
Love
My Well Being

I spend a lot of time thinking about

The Next Step I Should Take To Be More Successful Than Where I Stand Now. As Well As Constantly Up Doing My Last Step.

On a typical Friday night I am

At A Friends House, Or Maby Even At The Grocery Store.

You should message me if

You Are Actually Trying To Get To Know Me , I Don't Bite!

Why is every word capitalized

CuddleCryptid
Jan 11, 2013

Things could be going better

It's a code worded into an anagram, that works out to read I-A-M-V-E-R-Y-D-U-L-L

dogstile
May 1, 2012

fucking clocks
how do they work?

cmndstab posted:

Her hair is two completely different colours here so you're probably right about her dying it.

Sorry ugly things blind me.

Shumagorath
Jun 6, 2001
FYI Neato was right however many months ago he said everyone needs to get on Bumble. Tinder has degenerated from an app with an honest purpose into a narcissistic extension of Instagram where in a few months you will probably get unmatched if you don't SuperLike someone. Too bad it's iOS-only as far as I know but at least it's not some silly Winklevoss experiment like Hinge.

computer parts
Nov 18, 2010

PLEASE CLAP

Shumagorath posted:

FYI Neato was right however many months ago he said everyone needs to get on Bumble. Tinder has degenerated from an app with an honest purpose into a narcissistic extension of Instagram where in a few months you will probably get unmatched if you don't SuperLike someone.

Instead of Bumble where you get unmatched if the girl doesn't message you in 24 hours.

Shumagorath
Jun 6, 2001
Works great for me so far, but yeah I know it doesn't completely eliminate match collection or cold feet. Also when the bots hit this service it's going to be way worse than Tinder ever was, and the only way to fix it is going to require an uncomfortable amount of Facebook access.

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


computer parts posted:

Instead of Bumble where you get unmatched if the girl doesn't message you in 24 hours.

you can extend one for a day though. that usually gets the cold feet ones to message.

man i hated hinge.

Business Gorillas
Mar 11, 2009

:harambe:



i think i found it:

quote:

*****DISCLAIMER*****
I AM CURRENTLY SEEING SOMEONE. I do not check this at all anymore. However, I'm keeping it. Just in case.

Do not just message me "hey what's up?" or "How are you?" I am not into small talk. It's BORING! Talk to me about something in my profile or don't talk to me at all. I am interested in all different types of people, so don't be afraid to message me. You miss out on all of the chances you didn't take.

Right now I am just strictly looking for friends. If it eventually developed into a relationship great, if not also great.

I'm a single mom of 2 beautiful little girls. My oldest is 4 and my youngest just turned 2 in May. Do you have any kids? Let's have a play date!!

I have limb girdle muscular dystrophy 2i. (http://www.lgmd2i.com)

I message some people first, but never people without kids. So if you don't have kids and you are interested message me first.

Not that it really matters, but hopefully it stops some idiots from messaging me. I have hpv. Don't just message me for sex. (http://www.webmd.com/sexual-conditions/hpv-symptoms-tests)

What I知 doing with my life
My kiddos are my responsibility and will always come before me, so first and foremost I'm raising them :).

I work at an adult store.
I知 really good at
Being a mom, puzzles, reading people, board games, being honest, throwing sexual innuendos into everything. Using the Annie champion on league of legends!

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books - any Nicholas Spark's book is good in my eyes. I don't read much.

Movies - War movies are my absolute favorite. I also love romantic comedies, and any action movie. Scary movies are good, as long as I have someone to cuddle up next to. I hate any movie with Will Ferrell

Shows - I am watching New Girl on Netflix right now. It is the greatest show I have ever seen. I watch a wide range of shows. The good wife. Masterchef. Orange is the new black. Love all doctor shows, lawyer shows, and food competition shows.

Music - I listen to EVERYTHING. I have 60s, 90s, 2000s, metal, pop, rock, and country in my shuffle list.

Food - I'm a simple girl. I like burgers, pizza. And chicken. I do not like bacon or mushrooms.

The six things I could never do without
1. My kids
2. My dog
3. Coca-Cola
4. 420
5. Netflix or Hulu
6. Nature

I spend a lot of time thinking about

My kids and how to better my life for them. The next park I'm going to visit.

On a typical Friday night I am

I'm a single mom. I'm usually home with my kids. We also frequently go to the park. We love nature. Join us on on a walk? On the off chance I don't have them. I would be up for anything!

You should message me if

Here are some interests of mine. Feel free to use these as talking points.

Nature
Kids
Family
420 Friendly
Tattoos
Piercings
Singing
The BDSM lifestyle
Floggers
Movies
Music
Binge watching Netflix starting at 9 pm lol
Kids
Dogs
The acoustic guitar
4 wheeling
League of legends

STD-ridden dildo salesman and mother of two at 27 with muscular dystrophy keeps okcupid open to see if she can trade up from the person who tolerates her computer games and multiple diseases.

Business Gorillas
Mar 11, 2009

:harambe:



i dont understand people who put the "DONT loving BOTHER ME WITH SMALLTALK" on their stuff.

are these people actively looking for dates that divulge personal history and information at will to total strangers on the internet?

Lufiron
Nov 24, 2005
so I signed up for bumble to try and get some out there poo poo to laugh at and immediately got bombarded with likes and messages from bots. I deleted the account and uninstalled

shits already been taken over guys, sorry

CuddleCryptid
Jan 11, 2013

Things could be going better

Business Gorillas posted:

i dont understand people who put the "DONT loving BOTHER ME WITH SMALLTALK" on their stuff.

are these people actively looking for dates that divulge personal history and information at will to total strangers on the internet?

I can kind of see why because there are lots of people who just chat and chat and chat without sealing the deal and going on a real date, but still expecting people to open up with how their dad used to beat them or whatever just kills it too.

Several time I was taking to someone for like five minutes and they brought up that they were a year clean from drugs or that they were sexually assaulted or some poo poo. How do you continue casual conversation after that?

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


Lufiron posted:

so I signed up for bumble to try and get some out there poo poo to laugh at and immediately got bombarded with likes and messages from bots. I deleted the account and uninstalled

shits already been taken over guys, sorry

have only matched with real people still.

FedEx Mercury
Jan 7, 2004

Me bad posting? That's unpossible!
Lipstick Apathy
There's a Bumble app on Android but nobody is using it, I'm guessing it's not what you are talking about.

Medium Cool
Dec 27, 2006

Yr sister is a beauty when she's naked
Grimey Drawer

notZaar posted:

There's a Bumble app on Android but nobody is using it, I'm guessing it's not what you are talking about.

The android app is some pointless photo sharing thing.

im cute
Sep 21, 2009

Business Gorillas posted:

I'm a simple girl. I like burgers, pizza. And chicken. I do not like bacon or mushrooms.

At first I thought "who the gently caress likes chicken but not mushrooms?" but then I realized she meant fried chicken exclusively and now I know it's not meant to be.

DreamShipWrecked posted:

I can kind of see why because there are lots of people who just chat and chat and chat without sealing the deal and going on a real date, but still expecting people to open up with how their dad used to beat them or whatever just kills it too.

Several time I was taking to someone for like five minutes and they brought up that they were a year clean from drugs or that they were sexually assaulted or some poo poo. How do you continue casual conversation after that?

Some people have so little going on that there isn't much of a buffer of anecdotes and stories to fill the interesting-but-not-harrowing stratum between "small talk" and "divulging dark disgusting personal secrets". They may also lack the social graces or be too self-absorbed to talk about current events.

im cute fucked around with this message at 22:38 on Oct 5, 2015

YeahTubaMike
Mar 24, 2005

*hic* Gotta finish thish . . .
Doctor Rope

Business Gorillas posted:

i dont understand people who put the "DONT loving BOTHER ME WITH SMALLTALK" on their stuff.

are these people actively looking for dates that divulge personal history and information at will to total strangers on the internet?

getting messages that just say "Hey" or "How r u" is really annoying and bothersome, like, at least put in a minimal amount of effort to ask me about something on my profile or tell me a little bit about yourself

Owlbear Camus
Jan 3, 2013

Maybe this guy that flies is just sort of passing through, you know?



i like to break the ice with a picture of my erect penis

Lufiron
Nov 24, 2005

Otisburg posted:

i like to break the ice with a picture of my erect penis

what macro lens do you use on your camera

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008

:mediocre:

Ratjaculation
Aug 3, 2007

:parrot::parrot::parrot:



unsolicited dick pics are the funniest thing

Business Gorillas
Mar 11, 2009

:harambe:



YeahTubaMike posted:

getting messages that just say "Hey" or "How r u" is really annoying and bothersome, like, at least put in a minimal amount of effort to ask me about something on my profile or tell me a little bit about yourself

Maybe we have different definitions of small talk since what you're describing is exactly what I define small talk to be

Ratjaculation
Aug 3, 2007

:parrot::parrot::parrot:



Business Gorillas posted:

Maybe we have different definitions of small talk since what you're describing is exactly what I define small talk to be

To him small talk is the ladies talking about his weiner

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FedEx Mercury
Jan 7, 2004

Me bad posting? That's unpossible!
Lipstick Apathy

YeahTubaMike posted:

getting messages that just say "Hey" or "How r u" is really annoying and bothersome, like, at least put in a minimal amount of effort to ask me about something on my profile or tell me a little bit about yourself

This is why I don't message anybody

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