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Stoatbringer
Sep 15, 2004

naw, you love it you little ho-bot :roboluv:

Volume posted:

The Bible is free online, and more beneficial.

Which is the right one, though? There are so many to choose from!

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Aleph Null
Jun 10, 2008

You look very stressed
Tortured By Flan

Stoatbringer posted:

Which is the right one, though? There are so many to choose from!

King James, you heathen!

Scrotum Modem
Sep 12, 2014

Stoatbringer posted:

Which is the right one, though? There are so many to choose from!

happyhippy
Feb 21, 2005

Playing games, watching movies, owning goons. 'sup
Pillbug

Volume posted:

"the average college student at a public school spends about $1,200 a year on textbooks," a cost that has increased by 82% over the last decade alone. The Bible is free online, and more beneficial.

I would pay good money to see the Bible replace engineering and medical classes in the US.
I so want to see someone trying to build a skyscraper using the same methods as Noah did his ark.
And bird's blood being used to treat stuff.

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
As I said God created an mature earth. He also made mature adults. At a day old Adam was a man of years. 
It seems so weird how people fail to realise that the earths age physically does not represent the age by scientist. 
Because the physical age was not the age it took to create it.

TacticalUrbanHomo
Aug 17, 2011

by Lowtax

Volume posted:

As I said God created an mature earth. He also made mature adults. At a day old Adam was a man of years. 
It seems so weird how people fail to realise that the earths age physically does not represent the age by scientist. 
Because the physical age was not the age it took to create it.

ah yes, last thursdayism

alternatively, the "god is a liar" hypothesis.

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
Sen. Ted Cruz’s father says LGBT activists will move to legalize pedophilia. 
I don't think they will have to fight too hard if at all. The moral marriage has been thrown away by the not so supreme court. The "boundary of right and wrong" concerning marriage has been breached. Just look at the Roe v. Wade decision and where it is now (Planned Parenthood, abortionists who have absolutely NO BOUNDARIES). 
This is the future of marriage. 
Jesus come quickly.

Aleph Null
Jun 10, 2008

You look very stressed
Tortured By Flan

Volume posted:

Jesus come quickly.

He's a selfish lover?

zimboe
Aug 3, 2012

FIRST EBOLA GOON AVOID ALL POSTS SPEWING EBLOA SHIT POSTS EVERWHERE
I'm literally retarded
Just a single niggling point about Easter-

Rabbits don't lay eggs.

The ony hairy warm-blooded oviparous animal that even distantly resembles a rabbit is the platypus.

So I think there must have been a serious historical error here- all this time we should have been celebrating the Easter Platypus.

Please correct your greeting cards.

Jimbone Tallshanks
Dec 16, 2005

You can't pull rank on murder.

Counterpoint:

zimboe
Aug 3, 2012

FIRST EBOLA GOON AVOID ALL POSTS SPEWING EBLOA SHIT POSTS EVERWHERE
I'm literally retarded

Awww, cute little hedgie.
But platypusses are softer.

budgieinspector
Mar 24, 2006

According to my research,
these would appear to be
Budgerigars.

zimboe posted:

Awww, cute little hedgie.
But platypusses are softer.

Right up until you reach the spur.

Anyway: Christian Couple Sue for Right to Keep Their Kids Uneducated as They Await Rapture

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
That is not the logic I'm using at all, Yoda. The Bible clearly distinguished between the sun and stars. The Sun is not a name for our star like Lassie is the name of a dog. According to the Bible, the sun is different from the stars, had a different beginning, and will endure forever. Stars, on the other hand, will fall from the heavens in the future.

old beast lunatic
Nov 3, 2004

by Hand Knit
Just wanted to share this inspirational little nugget of joy from my facebook wall with the thread. God bless.

RabbitWizard
Oct 21, 2008

Muldoon
Wtf? Of course he got off the cross, they took him off and put him in a cave. And hundreds of years later he created your father, already knowing that he will shoot your mom some day. 66% of you won't quote this, But remember what the bible say's " The Lord is a jealous and vengeful God; the Lord is vengeful and strong in wrath."

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

InterFaced posted:

Just wanted to share this inspirational little nugget of joy from my facebook wall with the thread. God bless.



yo that little girl had a mental breakdown while watching her dad murder suicide on her mom

quote:

On Monday, the Texas Supreme Court will hear arguments over whether Christian parents of homeschooled children have to follow basic educational standards or if they're allowed to keep their kids blissfully free of knowledge as they wait to be whisked off to heaven.

$5 says they'll give the parents the okay.

NeoHentaiMaster
Jul 13, 2004
More well adjusted then you'd think.

InterFaced posted:

Just wanted to share this inspirational little nugget of joy from my facebook wall with the thread. God bless.



I didn't believe until I read a story about one of the most horrific things imaginable happening to a young girl.

old beast lunatic
Nov 3, 2004

by Hand Knit
I am glad jesus was behind the couch with that little girl otherwise that situation might have been pretty bad.

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
Former prime minister Tony Abbott was the subject of "bigotry at its most shameful" over his Catholic beliefs, Attorney-General George Brandis claims.

Senator Brandis made the comments while addressing a roundtable on religious freedom at the Australian Human Rights Commission in Sydney.

He said Australia has an "inconsistent" approach to religious tolerance, expressing concerns at what he claimed were growing levels of anti-Catholicism in Australia.

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

Jimbone Tallshanks
Dec 16, 2005

You can't pull rank on murder.


It's real: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fq6lG4GeEMI

Last time was Hercules, Superman, and Duck Dynasty guy but this time they've got Sabrina the Teenage Witch and Black Ghostbuster.

A Stupid Baby
Dec 31, 2002

lip up fatty

Uh didn't you hear "human being" has been reclaimed by gbs as not a slur

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

Data Graham
Dec 28, 2009

📈📊🍪😋



I always wondered why a proverb wasn't to a verb what a pronoun is to a noun

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme

sluggo is mad
Jan 14, 2012

Buglord
my father was a southern baptist pastor ama

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

As witnessed in the Bible in Genesis 19:1-11, homosexuals are predatory, continually on the search for their next sexual experience. Homosexuals are characterized by morbid, unhealthy, sexual desire (which the Bible calls lasciviousness). Homosexuals are prone to multiple sex partners, because homosexuality is rooted in sex-addiction. I heard a homosexual say that “sex is sex, whether male or female.” May I say, sex with the same sex is a horrible sin, and a form of mental illness caused by spiritual rebellion against God and His holy Word. Romans 1:28 teaches that homosexuality is a form of sex addiction, whereas God gives a person over to their wicked fleshly lusts which war against men's souls (1st Peter 2:11). All of the empty homosexual closets across America are as vampires who've come from the dead to seduce the living.

The Bible says that those who live in pleasure are DEAD while their ALIVE (1st Timothy 5:6). Galatians 2:20 wonderfully teaches that Christians are ALIVE in Christ, or better said, Christ is alive in us. Galatians 2:20, “I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.” The spirit of lust and Satan is at work in homosexuals, seeking their next victim. Many are pederasts!

Ride The Gravitron fucked around with this message at 19:41 on Nov 8, 2015

A Stupid Baby
Dec 31, 2002

lip up fatty
I drove to Oklahoma and back this morning and saw a billboard somewhere in there that said "Reclaim America for Jesus". Based on my 5 hours in Oklahoma that is like asking the army to reclaim Ft. Bragg

Sleeveless
Dec 25, 2014

by Pragmatica
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xRegUuydEUg

glowstick party tonight
Oct 4, 2003

by zen death robot

Aleph Null posted:

He's a selfish lover?

He's a shellfish lover, that's why they had to throw out the Leviticus laws

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
Atheists, have you ever thought why you weren't born 3000 years ago?
Now questions like this are so deep that not many men can think on this topic, because it's close to God knowledge.

By question is, with all the billions of people that were born over the past 3000 years, why werent you born between then and when you were born?
The only option that makes sense is that God Himself personally setup what time you were to be born.

Now like I said, this question is so hard to comprehend that it's hard to put into words, but I hope you get the drift. :)

So anyway, why weren't you born 3000 years ago?

glowstick party tonight
Oct 4, 2003

by zen death robot

Volume posted:

Atheists, have you ever thought why you weren't born 3000 years ago?
Now questions like this are so deep that not many men can think on this topic, because it's close to God knowledge.

By question is, with all the billions of people that were born over the past 3000 years, why werent you born between then and when you were born?
The only option that makes sense is that God Himself personally setup what time you were to be born.

Now like I said, this question is so hard to comprehend that it's hard to put into words, but I hope you get the drift. :)

So anyway, why weren't you born 3000 years ago?

My mutations were too stylish for 3000 years ago but God was eventually ready for my freaky code

Mathlete
Nov 30, 2005

It's hip to be a squared square.
Assign a number to everyone who ever has or ever will be born. Write the numbers on strips of paper and put them in a big bag.

How likely is it that your number would be picked first? Not very likely!

Chances of your number being drawn are much better after there are only a few hundred thousand strips left. So actually that guy is wrong. Also the world is probably going to end very soon.

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
I agree ...... demons can mimic the likeness of a deceased person for all sorts of reasons. They have fun scaring people in old houses but the #1 reason they "haunt", imho, is to discredit the Bible on its teaching about Heaven and Hell.

My dear parents were unbelievers as far as I know {there's always hope a person may have quietly called out to Jesus at the end}. After my Mom died, my grieving Dad swore emphatically that she would sometimes be standing in the living room, smiling, surrounded by a beautiful glowing light. He told everyone who'd listen that it was no illusion .... that her spirit was really there. He was certain she had come back to comfort him. As an unbeliever at the time I was skeptical but kept an open mind.

A few months later I was saved and learned what paranormal apparitions really are. I had a talk with my Dad -- gently telling him it wasn't my Mother he had seen but a cruel deception by Satan meant to confuse him. I explained that God does not allow the dead to visit the living, and that their eternal destiny is in God's hands depending on if they had faith in Christ or not.

With tears streaming down his face, my sweet Dad heard the Gospel.....all because a demon decided to mess with him. I can't say for sure if he eventually gave his life to Christ at some point but a couple of times when I popped by his house I "caught" him listening to preaching on Christian TV or radio.

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme
warlord jesus

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
The media's portrayal of Taylor Swift as a Christian is a big farce! Her younger brother is a student at the University of Notre Dame, a Catholic research university. Catholicism is a Satanic cult! Although rumors circulate on the internet of Swift's Christian background, Taylor herself refuses to acknowledge that she is a Christian.

Pastor Jerry Falwell (1933-2007) once said that we don't have to lift the sewer cap to know what's in the sewer. He's correct! But the reason I expose things such as this horrible video by Taylor Swift is because the media have painted a rosy picture of Miss Swift as a good innocent girl compared to bad girl Miley Cyrus. The truth is that they're all “Pawns In The Game” of the Illuminati's agenda to destroy America's youth, turning them into Communist sympathizers, liberals and sex-perverted Satanists. Parents need to speak out and denounce the immoral, Satanic, ungodly music and videos of Taylor Swift. Truly, we are living in the “perilous times” of the Last Days as foretold in 2nd Timothy 3:1-5 in the New Testamen

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
The only diversity school needs is the Bible

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Kanthulhu
Apr 8, 2009
NO ONE SPOIL GAME OF THRONES FOR ME!

IF SOMEONE TELLS ME THAT OBERYN MARTELL AND THE MOUNTAIN DIE THIS SEASON, I'M GOING TO BE PISSED.

BUT NOT HALF AS PISSED AS I'D BE IF SOMEONE WERE TO SPOIL VARYS KILLING A LANISTER!!!


(Dany shits in a field)

Volume posted:

The only diversity school needs is the Bible

The bible indeed represents a wide diversity of bullshit.

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