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I doubt he had narcolepsy. It was more like he was lazy as gently caress and never managed his time so he was always tired.
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Nov 24, 2015 09:11
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Name one person who didn't lie on all their paperwork coming into the military and I'll show you a fool.
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Nov 25, 2015 15:17
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i lied like hell on mine
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Nov 25, 2015 16:14
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I didn't lie because I just never brought stuff up like my recruiter told me. That scar on my stomach is from getting my appendix out. Which is true, so I didn't lie. I just didn't tell them that I also had intestinal surgery as a kid, and that they took my appendix at the same time.
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Nov 25, 2015 16:20
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"I never did drugs before" - 6 weeks after doing mushrooms in a barn and screaming as I tripped balls and thought some of the tobacco hung up to dry was an Alligator. When I felt braver I kept yelling "Go bulldogs!" at it instead
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Nov 25, 2015 16:23
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The only thing I lied on is that I had taken ADHD medication when I was a kid. I wasn't on it actively at the time and aside from that I was in p. good health.
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Nov 25, 2015 18:05
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"I never did drugs." Failed the piss test at MEPS. Did a letter of "I'm sorry". "I never did drugs" It worked that time. I went to MEPS six times before shipping out.
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Nov 25, 2015 18:20
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Couldn't get enough of the old doc staring at your rear end in a top hat eh?
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Nov 25, 2015 18:22
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MurderBot posted:Couldn't get enough of the old doc staring at your rear end in a top hat eh? Yeah it was him looking at my butthole that I couldn't get enough of...
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Nov 25, 2015 18:23
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That and a few others. I really liked the underwear duck walk.
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Nov 25, 2015 18:24
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i will never forget you, small old asian man who cupped my balls
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Nov 25, 2015 18:28
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MurderBot posted:The only thing I lied on is that I had taken ADHD medication when I was a kid. I wasn't on it actively at the time and aside from that I was in p. good health. I didn't lie about ADHD meds because I had close to 15 years of on and off history with them at that point and probably would have been found out. They waived it and it's never been an issue.
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Nov 25, 2015 18:28
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I smoked weed the day before going to see my recruiter and we did as much paperwork as we could and he told me to just come back once a week and pee in a cup til I was clean. Mr. Cole have you ever done drugs? Nope.
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Nov 25, 2015 18:31
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My recruiter paid my vehicle violation (no insurance) after a cop weaves through traffic crazy like to pull me over for "suspected uninsured". So I got stereotyped as gently caress.
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Nov 25, 2015 20:06
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Cole posted:I smoked weed the day before going to see my recruiter and we did as much paperwork as we could and he told me to just come back once a week and pee in a cup til I was clean. Post-911-enlistment.bat
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Nov 25, 2015 20:16
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Wow, I didn't expect people to actually say what lies they put on government documents. Let's move on to what you put on your SF86s.
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Nov 25, 2015 21:56
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Cojawfee posted:Wow, I didn't expect people to actually say what lies they put on government documents. Let's move on to what you put on your SF86s. What do I care? I got a letter two weeks ago saying the Chinese already have my SF-86.
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Nov 25, 2015 22:07
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A few months ago I was an idiot. I had finished up with a hacksaw and thought it would be funny to use it to flip off one of my coworker's hat. Instead I ended up smacking her in the face, luckily she was wearing her Oakley's when this happened.
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Nov 25, 2015 22:08
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EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:What do I care? I got a letter two weeks ago saying the Chinese already have my SF-86. Yeah but you get three years of some company telling you that the chinese version of you got a credit card.
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Nov 25, 2015 22:26
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I would be tempted to fly over and murder the Chinese version of me. It's not like anything of value would be lost.
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Nov 25, 2015 22:46
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They would be more efficient
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Nov 25, 2015 23:11
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Soulex posted:They would be more efficient You're thinking of the Japanese. You've seen the China.jpg thread, right?
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Nov 25, 2015 23:20
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It's possible I have mixed up my Asian stereotypes yes
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Nov 25, 2015 23:34
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All I know is that a country where it's acceptable to steal credit cards and poo poo on the street is a garbage country.
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Nov 25, 2015 23:41
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gently caress those Chinese assholes. 8 months after I got hired and I still haven't started working because my security clearance hasn't come in yet. I hope Chinese me dies of radiation sickness.
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Nov 26, 2015 02:57
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LostCosmonaut posted:gently caress those Chinese assholes. 8 months after I got hired and I still haven't started working because my security clearance hasn't come in yet. I hope Chinese me dies of radiation sickness. You still getting paid though?
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Nov 26, 2015 03:49
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Fart Sandwiches posted:You still getting paid though? Lol nope Sitting at home doing nothing (had a part time job but it was seasonal), and the grace period just ran out on my loans. 
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Nov 26, 2015 15:00
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EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:What do I care? I got a letter two weeks ago saying the Chinese already have my SF-86. OPM should hang.
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Nov 26, 2015 16:40
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MrYenko posted:OPM should hang.
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Nov 26, 2015 16:58
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LostCosmonaut posted:gently caress those Chinese assholes. 8 months after I got hired and I still haven't started working because my security clearance hasn't come in yet. I hope Chinese me dies of radiation sickness. Were you submitted? My interim took less than 1 day, and my full adjudication took less than two months, this summer.
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Nov 26, 2015 17:49
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There was a stretch at the beginning of the summer where if your SF86 went in during then, they basically put you on a complete hold until a month or so ago.
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Nov 26, 2015 21:49
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Internet Wizard posted:There was a stretch at the beginning of the summer where if your SF86 went in during then, they basically put you on a complete hold until a month or so ago. I'm pretty sure that's what happened to me, I ended up having to resubmit my SF-86 in September.
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Nov 27, 2015 00:17
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EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:All I know is that a country where it's acceptable to steal credit cards and poo poo on the street is a garbage country. But enough about San Francisco.
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Nov 27, 2015 12:47
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ElMaligno posted:But enough about San Francisco. 
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Nov 27, 2015 19:33
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Specialist killed while trying to retrieve phone in highway
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Dec 3, 2015 16:44
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Seven six two....millimeter......full. metal. jaFuck wait I dropped my cellphone....
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Dec 3, 2015 17:14
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Jesus Christ people are dumb
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Dec 3, 2015 18:07
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he should be posthumously stripped of his driver medal
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Dec 3, 2015 18:09
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No, just award it to the lady driving the truck
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Dec 3, 2015 18:10
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| # ? Jun 6, 2024 22:23 |
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Another hero killed in the line of duty.
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Dec 3, 2015 18:20
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