NFL News/Views Week 12: JIMMY CLAUSEN LIBERATION STATION

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > NFL News/Views Week 12: JIMMY CLAUSEN LIBERATION STATION

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Intruder: Mar 5, 2003; I got a taste for blown saves

Cruel and Unusual posted:

ESPN did a useful thing and named the emergency quarterback for each team. I wonder who the best one would be.

http://espn.go.com/nfl/story/_/page/32for32x151125/emergency-quarterbacks-all-32-nfl-teams-wednesday-preview

For the Texans I have to believe it's Cecil Shorts now

# ? Nov 26, 2015 02:12

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# ? Jun 7, 2024 10:22

Suspect Bucket: Jan 15, 2012; SHRIMPDOR WAS A MAN
I mean, HE WAS A SHRIMP MAN
er, maybe also A DRAGON
or possibly
A MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL TEAM
BUT HE WAS STILL
SHRIMPDOR

Cactus Jack posted:

Chargers
@Titans
Colts
Falcons
@Saints
@Texans

The Jags have the easiest remaining schedule in the league and are probably going to be 7-9 or 8-8 this season. That will best my 6-10 prediction and I'm not sure how to feel about this.

I would be loving thrilled with 8-8. Dancing in the god drat streets.

.500 MOTHERFUCKERS WHAT NOW

Intruder posted:

For the Texans I have to believe it's Cecil Shorts now

My love for the halfback pass is without end.

Suspect Bucket fucked around with this message at 03:04 on Nov 26, 2015

# ? Nov 26, 2015 02:59

Volkerball: Oct 15, 2009; by FactsAreUseless

NC-17 posted:

Does Starr even know who Favre is?

Pretty sure they went to high school together.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 03:17

Pops Mgee: Aug 20, 2009; People all over the world,
Join Hands,
Start the Love Train!

NC-17 posted:

Does Starr even know who Favre is?

He doesn't remember who Lombardi is so probably not. :smith:

# ? Nov 26, 2015 03:20

Blowjob Overtime: Apr 6, 2008; Steeeeriiiiiiiiike twooooooo!

Ribsauce posted:

The Jags guy melting down over Gerhart failing to get in the end zone 4 times in a row was probably the highlight of the season.

Is the melt down directed at Gerhart, and if so, is there a gif? That dude was a caste football idol when he was backing up AP, and I bet there are plenty of opinions over there now about him actually being good tying his lack of production to "other" members of the team.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 03:28

FINGERBLASTER69: Nov 15, 2014

Goetta posted:

It bothers me to no end that the NFL used to have radio highlight packages synced with video after each game online and now they just show the stupid NFL Network highlight reel with a bunch of random studio guys who didnt watch the game shouting random poo poo

I hate this poo poo. They are absolutely terrible. I'm watching a highlight and one of them just starts blurting out nouns. HOT SAUCE!! VANILLA!! GUAVA!! PEPPER!! or they start arguing abut DA U while the highlight is running. The Gameday crew is so trash.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 03:40

Lime Tonics: Nov 7, 2015; by FactsAreUseless

Now is a good time to buy 49ers tickets at least since,

49ers tickets selling for less than parking passes,

http://www.sfgate.com/sports/article/49ers-tickets-selling-for-less-than-parking-passes-6657243.php

Best part of the story, "That decline is not surprising given the exodus of talent and on-the-field struggles. But the loss of value has led to some serious frustration from fans. Last month owner Jed York was ripped on Twitter after he sent out an offer of free tickets, with one commenter saying "I can't give my seats away either."

# ? Nov 26, 2015 03:47

Suspect Bucket: Jan 15, 2012; SHRIMPDOR WAS A MAN
I mean, HE WAS A SHRIMP MAN
er, maybe also A DRAGON
or possibly
A MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL TEAM
BUT HE WAS STILL
SHRIMPDOR

Lime Tonics posted:

Now is a good time to buy 49ers tickets at least since,

49ers tickets selling for less than parking passes,

http://www.sfgate.com/sports/article/49ers-tickets-selling-for-less-than-parking-passes-6657243.php

Best part of the story, "That decline is not surprising given the exodus of talent and on-the-field struggles. But the loss of value has led to some serious frustration from fans. Last month owner Jed York was ripped on Twitter after he sent out an offer of free tickets, with one commenter saying "I can't give my seats away either."

I will legit pay attention to 49ers games now just so I can watch Blaine Gabbert and not give a single poo poo. I will cheer if this train reaches the moon, or hell. Either way, I will be entertained.

I'm sorry you have to pay Everbank prices, 9'ers fans. I feel for you, cheap football tickets suucckk :jerkbag:

Suspect Bucket fucked around with this message at 04:00 on Nov 26, 2015

# ? Nov 26, 2015 03:51

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

Lime Tonics posted:

Now is a good time to buy 49ers tickets at least since,

49ers tickets selling for less than parking passes,

http://www.sfgate.com/sports/article/49ers-tickets-selling-for-less-than-parking-passes-6657243.php

Best part of the story, "That decline is not surprising given the exodus of talent and on-the-field struggles. But the loss of value has led to some serious frustration from fans. Last month owner Jed York was ripped on Twitter after he sent out an offer of free tickets, with one commenter saying "I can't give my seats away either."

$12,000 per seat SBLs.

My fiancee's family and I got 5 in the nosebleeds. $2,000 each.

loving Jed York man.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 03:56

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

Lol the falcons

# ? Nov 26, 2015 03:58

Suspect Bucket: Jan 15, 2012; SHRIMPDOR WAS A MAN
I mean, HE WAS A SHRIMP MAN
er, maybe also A DRAGON
or possibly
A MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL TEAM
BUT HE WAS STILL
SHRIMPDOR

Wait hold on

SFgate posted:

Blaine Gabbert, only attendee to Blaine Gabbert presser, has lots of questions for Blaine Gabbert

quote:

Blaine Gabbert can be a one man show, and as he found Wednesday during his press conference, Blaine Gabbert can also be a one man audience.
Gabbert showed up to his press conference on time only to meet a surprisingly empty room. Rather than leave the room, the quarterback sat himself down in the front row seat of the audience. Blaine Gabbert doesn't give up. Blaine Gabbert is sure they'll be arriving any moment now.

Blaine Gabbert I love you from a safe distance across the country

http://www.sfgate.com/sports/article/Blaine-Gabbert-presser-6657881.php

Suspect Bucket fucked around with this message at 04:08 on Nov 26, 2015

# ? Nov 26, 2015 04:03

Vhak lord of hate: Jun 6, 2008; I AM DRINK THE BLOOD OF JESUS

I'll be the one to ask the questions today," Gabbert said while sitting in a chair in the empty media room. The press conference was left off the team's media schedule, CSN Bay Area reports.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 04:07

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

I hope Gabbert hangs around for a 12 year career so I can keep thinking "Whoah there muthafucka" and giggle quietly to myself.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 04:17

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

Eifert Posting posted:

I hope Gabbert hangs around for a 12 year career so I can keep thinking "Whoah there muthafucka" and giggle quietly to myself.

My fiancee is already sick of me saying that like 10 times a game and we're only 2 games into it.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 04:27

Slowpoke!: Feb 12, 2008; ANIME IS FOR ADULTS

News: 13 Panthers and 10 Patriots lead the way in fan Pro Bowl voting. Other 30 NFL teams have 15.

Views: Really?

http://espn.go.com/nfl/story/_/id/14223502/tom-brady-new-england-patriots-leads-all-players-pro-bowl-fan-balloting

# ? Nov 26, 2015 04:28

Chris James 2: Aug 9, 2012

Slowpoke! posted:

News: 13 Panthers and 10 Patriots lead the way in fan Pro Bowl voting. Other 30 NFL teams have 15.

Views: Really?

http://espn.go.com/nfl/story/_/id/14223502/tom-brady-new-england-patriots-leads-all-players-pro-bowl-fan-balloting

I will not complain because Joe Webb is one of the people leading

# ? Nov 26, 2015 04:33

Ribsauce: Jul 29, 2006; Blacks in the back.

DrKennethNoisewater posted:

Is the melt down directed at Gerhart, and if so, is there a gif? That dude was a caste football idol when he was backing up AP, and I bet there are plenty of opinions over there now about him actually being good tying his lack of production to "other" members of the team.

It wasn't a guy in the crowd. When the Jags and Bills played in England they had 3 commentary options. The third was called "fantasy" so I assumed it was about fantasy football and did not click it at first. I was wrong. It was basically a play by play guy and a fan of each team in the booth (I think they were fans) and it was incredible. I don't know where they found these guys but they were funny as poo poo. They ran Gerhart 4 times in a row from the one and the Jags fan just got more and more outraged. It was so awesome.

Honestly, I'd rewatch the game just to laugh at those guys again. I have no idea who they were but they were instantly the best commentary team in the business, dead serious. I just tried to find an article about them but I can't.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 04:36

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

It was Brad Evans, one of their head fantasy guys and a Yahoo! blogger for each team. It was magical.

One guy just kept calling out a Jags DB repeatedly every time they threw his way because he was getting loving destroyed.

I miss that broadcast :sigh:

# ? Nov 26, 2015 04:38

Ribsauce: Jul 29, 2006; Blacks in the back.

I don't understand how yahoo! could throw 4 random guys in a booth and they are instantly better than any team the actual networks have. I get it was a different style (awesome instead of boring), but they were incredible. It sounded like they had been doing it for years.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 04:40

Happy Noodle Boy: Jul 3, 2002

Eifert Posting posted:

I hope Gabbert hangs around for a 12 year career so I can keep thinking "Whoah there muthafucka" and giggle quietly to myself.

You gotta link it every time, man

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjDeRBwO_7U

# ? Nov 26, 2015 04:44

Magicpants: Sep 15, 2011; Certified Poster

Michael Oher is the leading offensive tackle which pretty much proves the Pro Bowl is just a name recognition contest

e: lolololololololololol the entire offensive line is Panthers and Patriots

Magicpants fucked around with this message at 04:52 on Nov 26, 2015

# ? Nov 26, 2015 04:50

The Big Jesus: Oct 29, 2007; #essereFerrari

Ribsauce posted:

I don't understand how yahoo! could throw 4 random guys in a booth and they are instantly better than any team the actual networks have. I get it was a different style (awesome instead of boring), but they were incredible. It sounded like they had been doing it for years.

Uh yeah it's easy instead of saying the same loving cliches for three hours they say what the fans are actually thinking.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 04:55

shiksa: Nov 9, 2009; i went to one of these wrestling shows and it was... honestly? frickin boring. i wanna see ricky! i want to see his gold chains and respect for the ftw lifestyle

Magicpants posted:

Michael Oher is the leading offensive tackle which pretty much proves the Pro Bowl is just a name recognition contest

e: lolololololololololol the entire offensive line is Panthers and Patriots

if joe webb wasn't proof enough, god drat.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 05:05

Paint Crop Pro: Mar 22, 2007; Find someone who values you like Rick Spielman values 7th round picks.

shiksa posted:

if joe webb wasn't proof enough, god drat.

Joe Webb rocks tyvm. :colbert:

# ? Nov 26, 2015 05:09

achillesforever6: Apr 23, 2012; psst you wanna do a communism?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qnkVBIEf-M
Carl phoning it in this week

# ? Nov 26, 2015 05:11

whypick1: Dec 18, 2009; Just another jackass on the Internet

OxySnake posted:

Joe Webb rocks tyvm.

Yep, he's the best.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 05:12

shiksa: Nov 9, 2009; i went to one of these wrestling shows and it was... honestly? frickin boring. i wanna see ricky! i want to see his gold chains and respect for the ftw lifestyle

OxySnake posted:

Joe Webb rocks tyvm.

hey man, i was on the unleash joe webb train until joe webb was actually unleashed.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 05:19

Chris James 2: Aug 9, 2012

shiksa posted:

hey man, i was on the unleash joe webb train until joe webb was actually unleashed.

All the more reason to get back on the train

It's for the Pro Bowl, the game we know we definitely won't watch. Who cares what others will be forced to see

# ? Nov 26, 2015 05:20

Chichevache: Feb 17, 2010; One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

Spoeank posted:

My fiancee is already sick of me saying that like 10 times a game and we're only 2 games into it.

This is the saddest post since nrr died. :smith:

# ? Nov 26, 2015 05:31

BlindSite: Feb 8, 2009

shiksa posted:

if joe webb wasn't proof enough, god drat.

Joe Webb has been playing pretty well as a special teamer, he plays on all units I think as a gunner and blocker and seems to be pretty willing to do the dirty work. Its not every day the team activates it's 3rd QB to run down the field and wreck dudes on ST unless they do it well.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 06:01

Brannock: Feb 9, 2006; by exmarx; Fallen Rib

http://espn.go.com/nfl/story/_/id/14220145/green-bay-packers-bart-starr-ready-emotional-homecoming

quote:

Bart Starr often falls asleep while watching his Green Bay Packers on TV, but on Sunday, for the first time in a long time, he remained engaged for their entire victory over the Vikings. He made a few comments about this touchdown or that one, and he even once identified Aaron Rodgers by name.

Starr has been surging in recent weeks, driving hard toward the established goal of a halftime appearance at Thursday night's Packers-Bears game at Lambeau Field for the unveiling of Brett Favre's retired No. 4. He's on schedule to fly Wednesday morning from his Birmingham, Alabama, home to Green Bay to finish the job, and this comes as no surprise to those close to him, those who watched the Packers legend survive two strokes, a heart attack and four seizures in September 2014, and then a life-threatening bronchial infection three months ago.

Though Starr's wife of 61 years, Cherry, said her 81-year-old husband doesn't remember specifics of his career and doesn't connect with old clips from his glory days, Starr's trainer, Brian Burns, said Tuesday his most resilient client can now recite a few basic facts he didn't know last month.

"I ask him what his number was, and he says, 'Fifteen,'" Burns said. "I ask him who he played for, and he says, 'Vince Lombardi.' I ask him what position he played, and he says, 'Quarterback.' One time he said, 'Linebacker,' and we got a good laugh over that. But he's made incredible progress. He is really coming back."

Starr is going back to Lambeau for what is likely the last time, and Cherry said she hopes the cheering of the sellout crowd "brings back memories for Bart, even if it's just for that moment." But here's the funny thing, said her son Bart Jr.: Bart Sr. would be the last Hall of Famer on the planet to want to take attention away from the official man of the hour, Favre.

"He never talks about himself," Bart Jr. said Tuesday. "He has no ego, and he wouldn't ever view this as having anything to do with him. He just wants to be part of an evening honoring Brett Favre."

But it's not that simple. Favre is a beloved Green Bay figure who deserves credit for delaying his ceremony a year to give Starr a chance to attend it, but Starr is the icon who bonded with Packers fans like no other quarterback. It's less about the five championships he won or the heroic touchdown he scored in the 1967 Ice Bowl than it is about the dignified way he carried himself. The way he forever opened his door to strangers who showed up at his home unannounced wanting an autograph or a photo or just a few minutes of his time.

"We've gotten over 1,000 pieces of mail or emails in the last two weeks from people all over the country," Cherry said. "They write to Bart things like, 'We're pulling for you,' or, 'I'll be at the game wearing your jersey.'" One young boy from California wrote to say he couldn't wait to join his family of Packers fans at Lambeau to see a quarterback who had retired decades before the boy was born.

Starr wasn't always a sure thing to make this trip to Green Bay. He suffered significant brain damage 16 months ago, and doctors didn't know if he'd ever make it out of the hospital. Three rehab sessions a week with Burns at his Cahaba Fitness facility in Birmingham got Starr in a position to return to Lambeau, until a bronchial infection landed him back in the hospital in late August.

"I remember sitting on his hospital bed thinking to myself, 'No way. He's worked too hard to let something like this stop him,'" Bart Jr. said. "With what he'd already demonstrated in coming back from the strokes and seizures and heart attack, I knew he could transcend this. And once he got back to rehab, I said, 'OK, he is so determined to do this.' To watch his relentless pursuit of the goal we'd set for him has been remarkable."

Out of the hospital and back in rehab, Burns said it took a week, maybe two, for Starr to "turn that switch back on and get that twinkle back in his eye." Starr had undergone two stem-cell treatments in Mexico in an attempt to speed his recovery, but it was what his son called "his indefatigable spirit" that fueled this final drive to Lambeau.

Starr began walking greater distances with less aid from his support network. He put aside his oversized exercise ball in favor of a football he would throw to Burns from 10-15 yards away.

"He used to toss it to me underhanded," the trainer said. "Now he throws it with that same over-the-top motion he had, spirals -- he puts [it] on the money all the time. We could do it 10 times in a row and he gets me in the chest every time. He's got a little of his swagger back, and I get emotional about it. The first time he could tell me his name and that he played for the Packers, I stopped the session because I started losing it a bit. I'm pretty sure I'll lose it when he walks on that field Thursday night."

Burns won't be the only one. He had Starr practice holding up his hand and waving to the Lambeau fans, but muscle memory should take care of that. When Starr's executive assistant, Leigh Ann Nelson, recently held up a copy of David Maraniss' biography of Lombardi, "When Pride Still Mattered," and asked him to name the man on the cover who he'd failed to identify for more than a year, Starr responded, "That's Coach Lombardi. Why do you ask?" Starr is scheduled Wednesday morning to board a jet provided by Century Insurance (he served on its board for 34 years) and to travel with Cherry, Bart Jr., Burns, Nelson, longtime family friend Brady Thames and others to the Wisconsin town he helped Lombardi put on the global map.

"It's a beautiful end to a beautiful story," Bart Jr. said.

It's a homecoming story like no other. Rain and snow are in the Thanksgiving-night forecast for Green Bay, but those who watched Starr conquer far worse at the Ice Bowl can expect a steady downpour of halftime tears.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 06:41

OperaMouse: Oct 30, 2010

Intruder posted:

For the Texans I have to believe it's Cecil Shorts now

Wouldn't the Texans have a JJ Watt wildcat package by now?

# ? Nov 26, 2015 06:47

Chromatic: Jan 21, 2005; You guys ready to hear a satanic song?

Starr loving owns.

Standing O or raze Lambeau to the loving ground.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 06:49

a neat cape: Feb 22, 2007; Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

Chargers news:

-Mike McCoy walked out of a press conference today because he's a giant baby who wouldn't answer if Javontee Herndon would still be the Chargers primary return specialist.
-Punt Return update: 10 games, total net punt return yards: 1
-Malcom Floyd practiced today, two weeks after tearing the labrum in his right shoulder. It's his last year, and he said he doesn't want to go out like that. Malcom Floyd is one of my favorite Chargers ever and I can't wait until they retire his number.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 07:20

Coldforge: Oct 29, 2002; I knew it would be bad.
I didn't know it would be so stupid.

Happy Noodle Boy posted:

You gotta link it every time, man

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjDeRBwO_7U

Why does the commentator call them the Texans? They're clearly wearing Falcons uniforms.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 07:36

shiksa: Nov 9, 2009; i went to one of these wrestling shows and it was... honestly? frickin boring. i wanna see ricky! i want to see his gold chains and respect for the ftw lifestyle

Brannock posted:

http://espn.go.com/nfl/story/_/id/14220145/green-bay-packers-bart-starr-ready-emotional-homecoming

oh god, he couldn't remember his number or position? probably unfair to call this a bloodsport, it's obviously a brainsport because that's what's sacrificed.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 07:49

a neat cape: Feb 22, 2007; Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

shiksa posted:

oh god, he couldn't remember his number or position? probably unfair to call this a bloodsport, it's obviously a brainsport because that's what's sacrificed.

Maybe it's because he's like 90

# ? Nov 26, 2015 07:53

poly and open-minded: Nov 22, 2006; In BOD we trust

And had two strokes

# ? Nov 26, 2015 08:42

Chichevache: Feb 17, 2010; One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

Arctic Baldwin posted:

And had two strokes

Ugh. I can never watch football again. This stupid loving sport.

See you in the GDT tomorrow.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 08:48

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# ? Jun 7, 2024 10:22

Popy: Feb 19, 2008

Happy Farve day.

# ? Nov 26, 2015 10:06

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > NFL News/Views Week 12: JIMMY CLAUSEN LIBERATION STATION

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