Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Scathach
Apr 4, 2011

You know that thing where you sleep on your arm funny and when you wake up it's all numb? Yeah that's my whole world right now.


33. Remove labels off glassware etc. rub with Peanut butter!

Alcohol, dipshits!

That entire list is balls.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

A HUNGRY MOUTH
Nov 3, 2006

date of birth: 02/05/88
manufacturer: mazda
model/year: 2008 mazda6
sexuality: straight, bi-curious
peircings: pusspuss



Nap Ghost

Scathach posted:

That entire list is balls.

It's like "Hints from Heloise," if Heloise suffered massive brain damage and then tried to teach a third-grade chemistry lesson. I especially liked the "wow we drink this stuff?!" comment on Kool-Aid mix being a weak acid.

The static from the dryer sheet attracts the food :psyduck:

Hirayuki
Mar 28, 2010


Scathach posted:

33. Remove labels off glassware etc. rub with Peanut butter!

Alcohol, dipshits!
Or, if you grew up in my family, lighter fluid. :black101:

3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010

I just leave the labels on because I'm Finnish :effort: The Iittala sticker will come off on its own in about five years if you machine-wash.

GnarlyCharlie4u
Sep 23, 2007

I have an unhealthy obsession with motorcycles.

Proof

Tiggum posted:

Do you suffer from some sort of debilitating illness that has left you with the muscle strength of a newborn kitten?

I like to cook. Also, I have forearms like Popeye.

Humboldt Squid
Jan 21, 2006

GnarlyCharlie4u posted:

This. You really need a whisk and forearms like Popeye to make whipped cream.
Also, a dispenser and some nitrous make life much easier.

Lifehack: Whisk your own whipped cream to get popeye muscles

Lifehack: Eat whipped cream for stealth muscles

Wanamingo
Feb 22, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

Humboldt Squid posted:

Lifehack: Whisk your own whipped cream to get popeye muscles

Lifehack: Eat whipped cream for stealth muscles



Checks out

FutonForensic
Nov 11, 2012

weekdays at 7:00 PM EST: Chopped!
weekdays at 7:30 PM EST: R I P P E D

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

What if you got stung by a bee on your dick, do you still smash it with a meat tenderizer? For how long? Until it stops hurting or until you end up with dick schnitzel?

Marius Pontmercy
Apr 2, 2007

Liberte
Egalite
Beyonce
The mayo killing lice trick doesn't tell you that you have to sleep with mayo in your hair for a week. I was very allergic to the chemical that's in the over-the-counter stuff and had to go that route. Just...use conditioner. It's not worth smelling like egg salad over.

EXAKT Science
Aug 14, 2012

8 on the Kinsey scale

Eponine posted:

The mayo killing lice trick doesn't tell you that you have to sleep with mayo in your hair for a week. I was very allergic to the chemical that's in the over-the-counter stuff and had to go that route. Just...use conditioner. It's not worth smelling like egg salad over.

Or olive oil

3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010

Life hack: don't get lice :smugmrgw:

Philippe
Aug 9, 2013

(she/her)
No no no. Life hack: shave off all your hair to prevent head lice.

Master Twig
Oct 25, 2007

I want to branch out and I'm going to stick with it.
There was the one a few pages back about leaving an article of clothing on the ground to attract your lost dog. It may sound like a dumb thing, but when my brother-in-laws dog ran off during a hunting trip, we got her back using that trick.

Filox
Oct 4, 2014

Grimey Drawer

Tasteful Dickpic posted:

No no no. Life hack: shave off all your hair to prevent head lice.

I went to school with a boy whose parents obviously didn't give a rat's rear end. In sixth grade, when the school nurse sent him home due to a head full of lice, he came in two or three days later with his whole head shaved, including eyebrows. His poo poo parents couldn't be assed to go buy the lice shampoo, poor bastard.

I think they had to take some parenting classes to keep their kids after the administration found out why he'd become a cue ball.

quote:

29. A Slinky will hold toast and CD's!

If I see this in someone's house, I'm defriending them in real life.

Grey Fox
Jan 5, 2004

Check out these essential tips for cooking with cheese:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PT4KosVQR3Q

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfxpwbWBNuU

Warbird
May 23, 2012

America's Favorite Dumbass

Pam on a bike chain is excellent if you have an enemy that is fond of biking. It is a light lubricant, but I don't want to think of what that would do to a chain and spokes.

Winter Stormer
Oct 17, 2012

Picnic Princess posted:

What if you got stung by a bee on your dick, do you still smash it with a meat tenderizer? For how long? Until it stops hurting or until you end up with dick schnitzel?


They're talking about this stuff. It's basically salt and sugar. I've heard people say it makes ant bites feel better but haven't ever tested it.

Wanamingo
Feb 22, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

Winter Stormer posted:


They're talking about this stuff. It's basically salt and sugar. I've heard people say it makes ant bites feel better but haven't ever tested it.

I'm curious how they define unseasoned if it's mostly just salt and sugar.

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

Adding sugar to meat instead of just hitting it with a mallet a few times? No wonder everyone is so fat these days.

3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010

Picnic Princess posted:

Adding sugar to meat instead of just hitting it with a mallet a few times? No wonder everyone is so fat these days.

It's great if you don't like the taste of meat but like the taste of sugar.

Sleeveless
Dec 25, 2014

by Pragmatica
The actual active ingredient in most meat tenderizers is bromelain, the enzyme in pineapples that completely wrecks your mouth if you eat too much at once. The sugar and salt are mostly just a base for it.

3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010

Sleeveless posted:

The actual active ingredient in most meat tenderizers is bromelain, the enzyme in pineapples that completely wrecks your mouth if you eat too much at once. The sugar and salt are mostly just a base for it.

Do they keep it from eating through the can?

InediblePenguin
Sep 27, 2004

I'm strong. And a giant penguin. Please don't eat me. No, really. Don't try.
Sugar and salt are tenderizers themselves. The sugar also helps to balance out the flavor of the salt so your meat isn't overwhelmed by how much goddamn salt you put on it when you shook the tenderizer on, AND it caramelizes when you cook the meat. It's not ideal to go flaffing sugar all over everything you loving eat but it does in fact serve a purpose in the meat tenderizer beyond "lol fat american fucks put sugar in their hamburgers" or something

Funxion
Nov 30, 2005

This man talks to empty chairs at conventions. Please help this man back to being an idol. Fight Alzheimers!

Jerry Cotton posted:

Do they keep it from eating through the can?

Only when they still used hydroflouric acid as main tenderizer.

Sponge Baathist
Jan 30, 2010

by FactsAreUseless

El Estrago Bonito posted:

Preparation H does tighten the skin it's applied to, so I could see it helping swelling. I had a friend who used to do fitness/body building photoshoots and rubbing your abs and biceps down with Prep H was a trick they used to make you look way more jacked.

I guess this explains why my grandpa always complained that it felt like his dick was shrinking

3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010

amityville anus posted:

I guess this explains why my grandpa always complained that it felt like his dick was shrinking

Did it put him off your rear end?

simplyhorribul
Jul 30, 2013
I wonder how many "Mix it all up"-bakers would gently caress this up too by turning it into butter. Well, it's already hosed, who the hell calls that sossy blob a whipped cream?

Lifehack; whole butter industry hates this simple trick!

simplyhorribul has a new favorite as of 15:53 on Dec 31, 2015

Samizdata
May 14, 2007

Jerry Cotton posted:

Life hack: don't get lice :smugmrgw:

Doesn't help much when you get them from covering the absent catcher during a baseball game, and the catcher's helmet apparently was full of them.

speshl guy
Dec 11, 2012

El Estrago Bonito posted:

Preparation H does tighten the skin it's applied to, so I could see it helping swelling. I had a friend who used to do fitness/body building photoshoots and rubbing your abs and biceps down with Prep H was a trick they used to make you look way more jacked.

I thought it just lubricated your butthole so turds can slide out without aggravating the hems. I guess ya learn something new every day!

Dogfish
Nov 4, 2009

speshl guy posted:

I thought it just lubricated your butthole so turds can slide out without aggravating the hems. I guess ya learn something new every day!

Believe it or not, the formula of Preparation H varies depending on where you live. They all contain some kind of astringent/anti-inflammatory, which will maybe shrink your haemorrhoids to some extent and will also help with puffy eyes or whatever Oprah uses it for. Some of them also have local anaesthetic in them to make your butt stop hurting.

LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011

PubicMice posted:

These are great Life Hacks, guys. Just really top notch.




This is a legit technique used in chemistry labs everywhere to control the flow of liquids.

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014

LeJackal posted:

This is a legit technique used in chemistry labs everywhere to control the flow of liquids.



Now I can pour hot water out of a plain mug without spilling any down the side!

Sponge Baathist
Jan 30, 2010

by FactsAreUseless

Jerry Cotton posted:

Did it put him off your rear end?

Grandma had real bad hemmoroids.

LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011

chitoryu12 posted:

Now I can pour hot water out of a plain mug without spilling any down the side!

You may not have glass stirring rods at home (I do.) but a butter knife works well enough.

aardvaard
Mar 4, 2013

you belong in the bog of eternal stench

#pigeonhax

quote:

[REQUEST] A way to get rid of pigeons. (self.lifehacks)
submitted by Bethesdia

Hey/r/lifehacks, I have been on this sub-reddit for a bit of time and I'm loving it! There's a lot of useful info here :).

Now, down to my problem. I live in a condo (an apartment with 2 floors), and we have 2 balconies, one bigger than the other (but I don't think that it matters). My father has tons of plants in the smaller balcony because he's quite the green thumb. Pigeons have been wandering around both balconies for a lot of time now and my dad gets mad at them and then brings the anger over to the family and overall into his personal life.

So what I am asking for is: Is there a life hack to keeping pigeons away without him having to get up every time, go the balcony and make really loud noises to keep them away? (after all, he is 57).

Thanks :)

quote:

theProfesional 1 point

You need to exercise your Second Amendment rights. This is real easy, go down to your local sporting shop and pick up a .22 caliber long-barrel handgun, perfect for target plinking. Except the targets you will be plinking are the pigeons on your dad's balcony. Once the pigeons are there, just sneak out really quiet and lock and load! You usually only have to shoot one or two, then leave them there for a week or two and the others will get the message real fast. If they start to come back after a while, just rinse and repeat. :)

https://www.reddit.com/r/lifehacks/comments/29vu50/request_a_way_to_get_rid_of_pigeons/ciozid9

walrusman
Aug 4, 2006

Try this one weird trick to get free room and board for five to seven years! Meet tons of interesting people!

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014

Why would he recommend a .22 handgun? A .22 rifle is much easier to shoot accurately, especially for a newbie.

Wanamingo
Feb 22, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

chitoryu12 posted:

Why would he recommend a .22 handgun? A .22 rifle is much easier to shoot accurately, especially for a newbie.

Yes, that's the part of his advice that I take issue with too.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Sodium Chloride
Jan 1, 2008

I think that trick would work to keep kids away from your house too!

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply