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Feb 9, 2016 05:09
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Abbey Rain does stuff for Mormon Girlz. That's what I know. So the cultural resources director of one of the state parks was talking to one of my classes last summer about some of the digs he'd done when he was younger. One of them was on some Mormon farmsteads. Basically they dug up a poo poo ton of booze and opiate bottles. The university funding the project had a mostly if not all Mormon leadership that insisted that the final report call these "beverage bottles" because they had no real way of know what was in there. Then he said something along the lined of "Mormon intellectuals, that's a good joke!" Pretty cool guy.
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Feb 9, 2016 05:23
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EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:So it's Scientology with tax-exempt status And a state. I was going to mention the single's ward. There's literally a separate church service for single adults, and they can/will transfer you to it. Edit: V That is seriously loving true.
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Feb 9, 2016 05:28
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KirbyKhan posted:How nostalgic are you for Mormon butts? not at all the crazy was truly crazy
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Feb 9, 2016 05:29
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KirbyKhan posted:How nostalgic are you for Mormon butts? I had a high school class mate who had to go to Peru and pay for his living costs during his mission by working a potato field. Rich Mormons always go to places like Europe, where it's like, how is that not just a 2 year vacation. But who the gently caress cares what Moromons do anyway.
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Feb 9, 2016 06:34
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Larry Parrish posted:I had a high school class mate who had to go to Peru and pay for his living costs during his mission by working a potato field. Rich Mormons always go to places like Europe, where it's like, how is that not just a 2 year vacation. But who the gently caress cares what Moromons do anyway. I thought missionaries were explicitly forbidden from having jobs and were expected to live off the "generosity" of the local Mormons?
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Feb 9, 2016 08:32
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Larry Parrish posted:I had a high school class mate who had to go to Peru and pay for his living costs during his mission by working a potato field. Rich Mormons always go to places like Europe, where it's like, how is that not just a 2 year vacation. But who the gently caress cares what Moromons do anyway. That explains the Christmas presents of the Mormon missionaries here in Belgium. I was doing a documentary on them and they were talking about the gifts their relatives back home got. One of their mother's got a brand new Chevy Camaro. I saw a couple in Indonesia. I thought they'd get some leeway in their costume but nope, they were walking around in clean pressed suits in the middle of the day in an impoverished neighborhood.
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Feb 9, 2016 08:55
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ManMythLegend posted:I thought missionaries were explicitly forbidden from having jobs and were expected to live off the "generosity" of the local Mormons? They're also not supposed to drink, but, well...
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Feb 9, 2016 08:58
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Larry Parrish posted:I had a high school class mate who had to go to Peru and pay for his living costs during his mission by working a potato field. Rich Mormons always go to places like Europe, where it's like, how is that not just a 2 year vacation. But who the gently caress cares what Moromons do anyway. The official line is that they all pay the same amount in and it goes into a central pool for everyone to use. Then all the kids go to a central training facility and get divvied out at 'random' by the folks working there who, you guessed it, "pray about it" so their decisions are final and immutable. Really this works out about how you'd think it would, with the heavy hitters in Utah pulling strings to get their kid the cushiest possible mission while someone else's kid gets to to freezing rear end Russia and get kidnapped*. I used to invite them over to my place in Germany a lot to feed them, generally they're pretty nice kids. They occasionally made a pass to *My wife bought a Mormon DVD that's supposed to be the story of this, which was directed by a guy who used to be a missionary in her area when she was a teenager. He also plays the lead role, and manages to do terribly at both jobs. His costar does slightly better but the movie still sucked balls. The 'true' story portrayed also changes it to where the heroic young missionaries pray and convert their kidnapper to the LDS church, when in reality he was a former member who dumped them when the church said they wouldn't pay up. They also portray how the church pressured the kid's rich daddy into not paying the ransom, only they show it as the kid's father heroically overcoming a crisis of faith (by leaving his son in the hands of kidnappers because he "prayed about it"). Mormons have their own film industry and it's loving awful.
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Feb 9, 2016 11:51
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Wild T posted:Mormons have their own film industry and it's loving awful. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QTYEtttwU18 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46PXaJxzuDE
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Feb 9, 2016 13:32
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Also they still think that black people all are descendants of Cain. That God made them darker so we could tell they are violent by nature, which is why black people couldn't join until the 80s and they were forced to or possibly face loss of tax status.
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Feb 9, 2016 13:36
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My theory: They know it's all a sham. Behind the closed doors they laugh at the religious jokes and enjoy their tax-free society within a society that gives most of them a better chance at getting ahead in life (true or not), AND the rest of society is so weirded out that there's never any questions asked. The mission trips are to let young men get their rocks off with 3rd world prostitutes (or discover they're gay) so those issues don't come up down the road.
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Feb 9, 2016 13:47
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Zeris posted:My theory: They know it's all a sham. Behind the closed doors they laugh at the religious jokes and enjoy their tax-free society within a society that gives most of them a better chance at getting ahead in life (true or not), AND the rest of society is so weirded out that there's never any questions asked. The mission trips are to let young men get their rocks off with 3rd world prostitutes (or discover they're gay) so those issues don't come up down the road. The higher ups are definitely sure it's a scam, but I'd say very few outside of the big cathedral in SLC know it's a scam. Mormons are notoriously easy to scam, case in point Manti Teo
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Feb 9, 2016 13:53
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Lol. Just remembered that Mormon teens are suppsoed to go to some kind of gay church thing at 5 in the morning. Suddenely makes perfect sense why the Mormons in my unit were never bothered about coming into work insanely early or random unit PT sessions.
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Feb 9, 2016 14:03
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My brother converted to Mormonism - or as everyone in my family calls it - the Cult My Brother/Son Joined. Shits like passive-aggression the religion. You know how the worst people about alcohol are former alcoholics and also how obnoxious religious converts are? Well imagine a perineal gently caress up joining a religion in his 30's that hates fun. Also my dad semi-jokes about putting "don't loving baptize after I die" into his will.
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Feb 9, 2016 14:25
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Nostalgia4Infinity posted:My brother converted to Mormonism - or as everyone in my family calls it - the Cult My Brother/Son Joined. Shits like passive-aggression the religion. You know how the worst people about alcohol are former alcoholics and also how obnoxious religious converts are? Well imagine a perineal gently caress up joining a religion in his 30's that hates fun. One of my brother's friends converted after marrying a Mormon, just because it means he gets a free house when her grandmother dies. But he's half black and claims all he ever does at church after services is manual labor and Home Depot/REI/Wal mart runs for church supplies
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Feb 9, 2016 14:38
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Nostalgia4Infinity posted:Well imagine a perineal gently caress Sounds painful
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Feb 9, 2016 14:48
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Booblord Zagats posted:Also they still think that black people all are descendants of Cain. That God made them darker so we could tell they are violent by nature, which is why black people couldn't join until the 80s and they were forced to or possibly face loss of tax status. It's amazing how their prophet (church president) has a miraculous vision whenever the law is going to gently caress them. Same thing happened with polygamy, banning it was one of the conditions of statehood. God's got great timing, I guess.  Nostalgia4Infinity posted:Also my dad semi-jokes about putting "don't loving baptize after I die" into his will. This was a Big Deal in the news when it got out. And I knew a lot of people who genuinely didn't see why anyone would have a problem with it (many people also don't have a problem with the polygamist settlements, either).
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Feb 9, 2016 16:35
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If a man wants to put up with the bullshit of multiple women he should be entitled to it.
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Feb 9, 2016 16:50
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Godholio posted:It's amazing how their prophet (church president) has a miraculous vision whenever the law is going to gently caress them. Same thing happened with polygamy, banning it was one of the conditions of statehood. God's got great timing, I guess. It was probably when they started baptizing jews who died in the holocaust.
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Feb 9, 2016 16:51
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Mormons are kind of interesting to me because my mom was dumb enough to get into the Jehovahs Witnesses before I was born. I was in that dumb poo poo until I was 11. There's a lot of similarities, especially the sudden "revelations" from God to their leaders when it was convenient (or the world failed to come to an end like they've predicted 3-4 times since the early 1900s).
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Feb 9, 2016 16:58
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Mike-o posted:Mormons are kind of interesting to me because my mom was dumb enough to get into the Jehovahs Witnesses before I was born. I was in that dumb poo poo until I was 11. There's a lot of similarities, especially the sudden "revelations" from God to their leaders when it was convenient (or the world failed to come to an end like they've predicted 3-4 times since the early 1900s). I always liked how the Popes handled this kinda poo poo from 1800 on "God was loving with us"
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Feb 9, 2016 17:00
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God is a dumb rear end in a top hat.
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Feb 9, 2016 17:04
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Booblord Zagats posted:I always liked how the Popes handled this kinda poo poo from 1800 on "God was loving with us" Catholics have an easy out. If the pope makes a policy decision, God makes it be true in Heaven as well.
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Feb 9, 2016 17:09
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Mike-o posted:God is a dumb rear end in a top hat.
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Feb 9, 2016 17:13
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Cojawfee posted:It was probably when they started baptizing jews who died in the holocaust. I didn't know this was a thing so I looked it up. Holy poo poo it's really a thing. What the gently caress, Mormons?
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Feb 9, 2016 17:13
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I've always imagined that if God is real, he'll handle the super churchy folks the same way a celebrity handles crazy fans
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Feb 9, 2016 17:14
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Pesticide20 posted:I didn't know this was a thing so I looked it up. Holy poo poo it's really a thing. What the gently caress, Mormons? They baptize dead celebrities, and victims of tragedies. It's really disgusting.
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Feb 9, 2016 17:16
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Godholio posted:They're also not supposed to drink, but, well... The saying is to never take a single Mormon fishing, because he'll drink all your beer.
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Feb 9, 2016 17:22
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Mike-o posted:God is a dumb rear end in a top hat. God is what happens when Ralp is made moderator of the universe.
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Feb 9, 2016 17:38
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Is Ralp the child toucher or mega obese one, or is it both
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Feb 9, 2016 17:42
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maffew buildings posted:Is Ralp the child toucher or mega obese one, or is it both Neither
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Feb 9, 2016 17:48
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maffew buildings posted:Is Ralp the child toucher or mega obese one, or is it both The child toucher was Aatrek. He was deleted from all the websites he contributes to.
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Feb 9, 2016 17:55
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Cojawfee posted:Catholics have an easy out. If the pope makes a policy decision, God makes it be true in Heaven as well. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=maqUW3QIByo&t=64s
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Feb 9, 2016 18:01
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Booblord Zagats posted:Also they still think that black people all are descendants of Cain. That God made them darker so we could tell they are violent by nature, which is why black people couldn't join until the 80s and they were forced to or possibly face loss of tax status. Nah, all of Cain's descendants died in the flood. Block people now are descendants of Ham, who was turned black because he's a filthy thief that tried to steal Noah's sacred clothes when Noah got turnt up one night. Black peoples could join before the 80s but they couldn't hold the priesthood which excluded them from ever doing anything that mattered in the church.
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Feb 9, 2016 18:09
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EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QTYEtttwU18
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Feb 9, 2016 18:15
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Nostalgia4Infinity posted:Neither So...would?
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Feb 9, 2016 18:18
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Don't Mormons have bunkers full of genealogy records for reasons? That Mission must be serious business if it was enough for Mitt Romney to avoid going to Vietnam..
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Feb 9, 2016 18:42
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I think Mitt Romney has gotten enough flak. Do you know how hard it was for him to go to Stanford and survive off only a trust fund?
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Feb 9, 2016 18:46
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Pesticide20 posted:I didn't know this was a thing so I looked it up. Holy poo poo it's really a thing. What the gently caress, Mormons? It's actually quite nice, from inside their world view. If you aren't saved by Jesus, you're going to hell. "But what about all those nice people before Christ, or who were somewhere else?" For most non-universalist Christians, the answer is, "too bad, your fault for being born some other place or time." The Mormons are baptizing whoever they can so they can have the option of not going to hell. (even though they're dead, they have a choice to accept or not accept the baptism - I guess it's something they ask at HEPS)
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Feb 9, 2016 19:19
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