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divabot posted:the keyboard has been drinking This is beautiful and now I have a new excuse. I'm already on whiskey and cigarettes, too bad I can't sing.
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Feb 18, 2016 15:32
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Segmentation Fault posted:A customer came in. I had a coworker who told me about a customer who walked in and straight up admitted to going to a porn site and infecting his computer real bad. His wife was out on a business trip so he paid extra to have a rush job done so he could get it fixed and looking like nothing ever happened. He was terrified of what hi wife would've done to him had she known he was looking at porn. He was back six months later.
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Feb 18, 2016 15:53
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A branch's main line got forwarded to someone's cell phone. That relationship banker is having a bad day.Renegret posted:I had a coworker who told me about a customer who walked in and straight up admitted to going to a porn site and infecting his computer real bad. His wife was out on a business trip so he paid extra to have a rush job done so he could get it fixed and looking like nothing ever happened. He was terrified of what hi wife would've done to him had she known he was looking at porn. This dude needs to find a healthier relationship.
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Feb 18, 2016 16:05
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Wibla posted:The generation that grew up with DOS and early Windows has some advantages over both younger and older people in my experience. Kids these days generally don't give a gently caress about how stuff works, they just want their games to work. Back in the early 90s you had to be somewhat computer literate to get poo poo working. Especially games. Now? Install steam, done. Honestly I never had to gently caress around with that stuff to get it working as a kid. You just had to stick the disk in the drive and type in the command printed on the disk to run or install it. Probably because my parents didn't cheap out on our computers, so no need to fuss around with boot disks to compensate for hardware issues.  I'd say if anything the like late 70s-mid 80s non-DOS home computers is where you really had to be computer literate to just play the game, especially when the system didn't have a disk drive.
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Feb 18, 2016 16:07
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Okay fishmech.
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Feb 18, 2016 16:41
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KillHour posted:This dude needs to find a healthier relationship. Seriously- who the gently caress marries someone with that much of a problem with pornography that you can't even look at it when they are gone? That just reeks of mistrust and self image issues.
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Feb 18, 2016 16:41
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Just Offscreen posted:Seriously- who the gently caress marries someone with that much of a problem with pornography that you can't even look at it when they are gone? That just reeks of mistrust and self image issues. Some people aren't cool with pornography, for whatever reason. That's fine. What's not fine is being in a relationship where you feel like you're going to get in trouble for watching pornography and deciding to hide it.
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Feb 18, 2016 17:01
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Some people think watching porn is tantamount to cheating.
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Feb 18, 2016 17:17
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I loved our customers when I was computer janitoring who admitted to getting viruses due to porn. I have them a (discreet) list of porn sites that would most likely NOT infect your computer, and not to click on the ads. Ever. Most of them only came back to buy new computers.
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Feb 18, 2016 17:21
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spankmeister posted:Some people think watching porn is tantamount to cheating. Which is fine. If both parties agree on the matter. If not, hiding the fact that you're doing something your spouse considers cheating is not healthy.
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Feb 18, 2016 17:23
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A  came inPay raise, 28 paid holidays AND 10 days of vacation AND 10 sick days, 100% of insurance paid by employer (and it's good insurance). I... I am gleeful. Especially since I'm just the T1 helldesk guy for the main office of a nonprofit, and going from temp to full employee.
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Feb 18, 2016 17:29
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FireSight posted:A Sounds awesome, congrats!
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Feb 18, 2016 17:42
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A month of holidays. Does talk like a pirate day count or something? Owner's brother in-law's birthday? Holiday.
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Feb 18, 2016 17:42
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Boogalo posted:A month of holidays. Does talk like a pirate day count or something? Owner's brother in-law's birthday? Holiday. Non-profit that works with schools. So if schools are closed for holidays? We close too. Week and a half off in July, week and a half off at Christmas, if it's a 3 day weekend (monday or friday off) we extend it to 4 days.
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Feb 18, 2016 17:53
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fishmech posted:Honestly I never had to gently caress around with that stuff to get it working as a kid. You just had to stick the disk in the drive and type in the command printed on the disk to run or install it. Probably because my parents didn't cheap out on our computers, so no need to fuss around with boot disks to compensate for hardware issues. Hey now, back then we had to configure the port addresses for our kickin' rad SoundBlaster and we drat well enjoyed it!
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Feb 18, 2016 18:04
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Segmentation Fault posted:A customer came in. We had a repeat customer who was a very old man who would constantly gently caress up his computer via porn tube sites. Not viruses, but stuff like one time he set his desktop to a thumbnail from a video and stuff like that.
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Feb 18, 2016 18:07
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fishmech posted:Honestly I never had to gently caress around with that stuff to get it working as a kid. You just had to stick the disk in the drive and type in the command printed on the disk to run or install it. Probably because my parents didn't cheap out on our computers, so no need to fuss around with boot disks to compensate for hardware issues. drat, I guess you got off light then I started out with an IBM PS/2 model 30 back in 1989, along with a Toshiba T1000SE. I was 6 years old and could barely read/write. My old man promised me that I could use the computer if I learned how to read and write properly. He has admitted to regretting that decision later  I still remember loving around with sound drivers in DOS 6.22 to get a Mediavision sound card with a SCSI CDROM running properly while still leaving me with enough memory to run games. Ugh.
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Feb 18, 2016 18:15
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I got my god-son a Raspberry pi 2 and a book on Python for Kids for his 7th birthday. Told him if he could show me that he completed all the exercises in the book, I'd help him install Minecraft and Youtube and he'd have his own little computer. It took him about a week, and he asked for more projects when he finished the book.
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Feb 18, 2016 18:23
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Antioch posted:I got my god-son a Raspberry pi 2 and a book on Python for Kids for his 7th birthday. Told him if he could show me that he completed all the exercises in the book, I'd help him install Minecraft and Youtube and he'd have his own little computer. 
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Feb 18, 2016 18:27
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Antioch posted:I got my god-son a Raspberry pi 2 and a book on Python for Kids for his 7th birthday. Told him if he could show me that he completed all the exercises in the book, I'd help him install Minecraft and Youtube and he'd have his own little computer. gently caress yes you are the best godparent. I've built a few side projects for my son, 3, with the rPi. One was a stoplight that he could play with his cars, and he thought it was the coolest thing that I built it. I'm trying to ingrain an engineers mindset with him (Don't worry, whatever happens we can fix it or build something new!) and can't wait for when he can start doing projects of his own.
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Feb 18, 2016 18:29
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FireSight posted:A Sounds like we work in the same building. Looking forward to that FTE status bump.
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Feb 18, 2016 20:57
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A customer was really mean to a customer service rep, and now his manager is demanding we "trace the call" like we're CSI or something. What are they even going to do with that information? Don't they know who they were talking to? It was a customer.
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Feb 18, 2016 23:26
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Antioch posted:I got my god-son a Raspberry pi 2 and a book on Python for Kids for his 7th birthday. Told him if he could show me that he completed all the exercises in the book, I'd help him install Minecraft and Youtube and he'd have his own little computer. This is awesome. My son is getting into Minecraft and is wanting to do modding, but he really has no clue. His solution is to ask me to do it for him, but 1: I'm not a programmer and 2: and trying not to drink. I would think about a book on Java programming for kids, but that sounds like child abuse. He also wants a computer and I am thinking about getting something cheap we can install Linux on and then he can do Minecraft there. How are other folks introducing there kids to tech?
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Feb 18, 2016 23:55
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Rude customers? You don't say! A couple days ago, I had a incompetent rear end in a top hat call to tell me the internet was out. I love when they start with that, is it a wifi password, loose cable, unpluged modem, broken computer, anything, all I get is the internet is out. I start troubleshooting and all I can see is the modem is online and devices are connected (the customer even insisted everything was connected) when suddenly the customer just went bat poo poo crazy and started demanding that I fix the outage in his area within the next hour or else. There was no outage reported, I attempted do some more troubleshooting, I explain the policy of outages, and offer to send a technician. The customer got even more pissed off and started demanding my address and employee ID and other poo poo so that he could report me to the FCC. Every single step I offered for further troubleshooting was met only with "you are lieing to me." After 10 minutes of listening to this jackass my manager finally accepted the call. . . two minutes later my manger sent me a message "it's all good, he just have to power cycle the modem." Best part was the customer swore that they worked for the same ISP, in the same department, as a manager, so I am totally getting fired over the call. . . My manager confirmed he is not a manager or even an agent in my department
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Feb 19, 2016 00:05
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Ghostlight posted:I wish I were still naive enough to believe that one day someone could invent a non-lovely printer. My Laserwriter 2100TN is still doing just fine.
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Feb 19, 2016 01:03
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Antioch posted:I got my god-son a Raspberry pi 2 and a book on Python for Kids for his 7th birthday. Told him if he could show me that he completed all the exercises in the book, I'd help him install Minecraft and Youtube and he'd have his own little computer. Just wait until he asks you about Bitcoin mining
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Feb 19, 2016 01:10
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KillHour posted:A customer was really mean to a customer service rep, and now his manager is demanding we "trace the call" like we're CSI or something. What are they even going to do with that information? Don't they know who they were talking to? It was a customer. Just call your local contact inside the PD for your city and use the favor he owes you for just this one last favor, after this you will both be square.
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Feb 19, 2016 03:44
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Alighieri posted:Just call your local contact inside the PD for your city and use the favor he owes you for just this one last favor, after this you will both be square. This assumes I give a poo poo. I'm saving that favor for when I need to find the corrupt politician that killed my future daughter and/or wife.
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Feb 19, 2016 05:14
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Antioch posted:I got my god-son a Raspberry pi 2 and a book on Python for Kids for his 7th birthday. Told him if he could show me that he completed all the exercises in the book, I'd help him install Minecraft and Youtube and he'd have his own little computer. this rules, you rule
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Feb 19, 2016 05:55
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KillHour posted:A customer was really mean to a customer service rep, and now his manager is demanding we "trace the call" like we're CSI or something. We have a site with some really, really cheap and lovely security cameras. Like the loving cheapest goddamn poo poo they could find. A manager once called me into his office and showed me some footage from said cameras and asked if there was any way I could "enhance" it. I couldn't think of a way to make a CSI reference without coming across like an rear end, but I really wanted to.
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Feb 19, 2016 05:59
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KiqkclCJsZs
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Feb 19, 2016 06:28
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Wibla posted:drat, I guess you got off light then I'm just jealous that kids today actually seem to get respect from their elders for computer skills. When I went to college I specifically avoided IT because I got poo poo on so much as a teenager even by adults that I simply could not understand how people could fix computers for a living and not go crazy from being disparaged and poo poo on all the time. My earliest memory of this was when I was 12 and a neighbor offered me $20 to get some program running. It didn't have enough memory and I'd had to deal with this with games before so I knew exactly what to do, open up CONFIG.SYS and move some things into the high memory area and it was working. I was then informed that since I only spent 5 minutes on the computer, I had not earned the $20 and needed to do other chores as well so I would learn the value of money. This happened so often, I'd be rich if I had a dollar for every time I heard some variant of, "but you were only in there for 10 minutes! You should become/talk to/must take advice from my lawyer." And then of course since I had only spent a few minutes, I must have done a shoddy job and therefore subsequent problems must be my fault. I actually ended up writing a fake scanner in QBASIC and taking a book with me whenever I got deputized into fixing someone's computer, just to waste time so I wouldn't get this.
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Feb 19, 2016 06:43
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You should have typed format c: just so he would learn the value of keeping his word.
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Feb 19, 2016 07:41
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Had 2 tickets that took up big chunks of my day. 1) My T1 and I go through every step in the knowledge base for this error and nothing works. The KB for this product is actually quite good and on the money, but this issue won't clear up and it is dragging on and on. Typically I'd just escalate to the T3 for some ideas or for them to takeover, but the T3* that is on is a worthless moron** who I've posted about before and I hate them oh so much. So I remote in and we work our way down the troubleshooting list. Nope, nope, nope, uh something. Okay progress, finally we do something that causes the error code to change to something else. Great, now we can try the steps in the KB for that one. Nope, nope, nope. This is the error from hell. I tell the T1 to inform the client this thing is hosed up and we're going to have to bounce it to the product's support team because nothing works. I then remember something and tell him to hold off for a sec. Early in the process for this I thought I had the answer since someone the prior day had an error with a similar name but with way different solution, it was like FileError7 while ours was like ConnError7. When the error code changed to something else, it changed to the error code they had the prior day. I run the fix that was mentioned for FileError7, which is not in the product's KB, and it works! I then thanked my memory and added it to our internal wiki in case it pops up again. 2) This one had no documentation. The computer wouldn't let anything install, it would throw up some "already installing" error. Tried a bunch of different fixes and still same error. I'm dealing with the first ticket during this, so I'm just offering suggestions since it should be something they can fix on their own I thought. Also, we have dumb dumb T3 problem, so we can't just ask a question or escalate to them. Once I finished up ticket 1, I remote into ticket 2 and attempt to install one of the programs that has to go on this thing to see what it is doing. It succeeds. I have done nothing since I connected and I ask the T1 if he's done anything and he says "Nope". This guy isn't modest or dumb so I believe him. As far as I know he said he was doing a fix, restarting, testing, doing another fix, and so on until I remote in. I guess I just have magic hands?  * - On a happy note, the most senior T3 is sick of him too and is actively working on getting him fired. ** - Today he was telling someone to run a checkdisk because a major external website was down, even when he was shown a site that tracks outages. 
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Feb 19, 2016 08:07
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J posted:We have a site with some really, really cheap and lovely security cameras. Like the loving cheapest goddamn poo poo they could find. A manager once called me into his office and showed me some footage from said cameras and asked if there was any way I could "enhance" it. I couldn't think of a way to make a CSI reference without coming across like an rear end, but I really wanted to. You have no idea how often I heard this when I was doing physical security sales. The sound of disappointment in people's voices was the worst and/or best part, depending on how much of a dick they are.
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Feb 19, 2016 13:58
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it's blade runner you dicks 
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Feb 19, 2016 16:56
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Antioch posted:I got my god-son a Raspberry pi 2 and a book on Python for Kids for his 7th birthday. Told him if he could show me that he completed all the exercises in the book, I'd help him install Minecraft and Youtube and he'd have his own little computer. SubjectVerbObject posted:How are other folks introducing there kids to tech?  This might call for a separate thread?
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Feb 19, 2016 17:04
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There's a ticket in the queue labeled "Smishing Incident." Someone in the fraud department has their S+...
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Feb 19, 2016 17:10
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Smish Mith
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Feb 19, 2016 17:12
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KillHour posted:A customer was really mean to a customer service rep, and now his manager is demanding we "trace the call" like we're CSI or something. What are they even going to do with that information? Don't they know who they were talking to? It was a customer. Don't you do call logging and call recording? Or do you not have your own PBX?
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