Microsoft: ~*spooky thread*~ post if you dare

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > Microsoft: ~*spooky thread*~ post if you dare

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Lysidas: Jul 26, 2002; John Diefenbaker is a madman who thinks he's John Diefenbaker.; Pillbug

Dodoman posted:

that;s what you get for using loving windows in 2016 idiots

# ? Mar 24, 2016 20:37

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 7, 2024 08:58

Siljmonster: Dec 16, 2005; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

https://twitter.com/TayandYou/status/712785189609410560?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

# ? Mar 24, 2016 20:49

theflyingexecutive: Apr 22, 2007

screencap these you nobs

# ? Mar 24, 2016 20:50

Siljmonster: Dec 16, 2005; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

theflyingexecutive posted:

screencap these you nobs

# ? Mar 24, 2016 20:52

program666: Aug 22, 2013; A giant carnivorous dinosaur

windows 10 impressions:
- wow mouse wheel finally works on hover :bravo:

microsoft
- vpn hangs on "disconnecting" and the only way to recover is rebooting the loving machine LOL - this happens every time I disconnect from the vpn
- also now I have to open a whole windows to connect/disconnect from vpn which is less practical than what we had in win 7
- all those new menus that are just awful versions of the control panel's windows that are never completely useful and I have to open the true version 100% of the time

sorry microsoft I try to be fair but the way you guys do things is a loving joke

program666 fucked around with this message at 20:58 on Mar 24, 2016

# ? Mar 24, 2016 20:55

DOG AT THE DOOR: Aug 29, 2007; bwha

Siljmonster posted:

not a one off either

there's about 10 more i didn't screencap

# ? Mar 24, 2016 21:16

akadajet: Sep 14, 2003

PleasureKevin posted:

the karaoke computer decided to update in the middle of karaoke night

then it hosed up

people were pretty mad

microsoft is garbage they can't even account for the one place people actually still use their products: work stuff

is this your job? to keep that computer up?

# ? Mar 24, 2016 21:22

flakeloaf: Feb 26, 2003; Still better than android clock

and i'm sure the songs on that ancient vista laptop that makes a business go are all properly licensed and respectful of copyright

# ? Mar 24, 2016 21:32

Celexi: Nov 25, 2006; Slava Ukraini!

PleasureKevin posted:

the karaoke computer decided to update in the middle of karaoke night

then it hosed up

people were pretty mad

microsoft is garbage they can't even account for the one place people actually still use their products: work stuff

that laptop is like 10 years old lmao

# ? Mar 24, 2016 21:41

Valeyard: Mar 30, 2012; Grimey Drawer

when i move my cursor why does it not look smooth !!!!!!!

# ? Mar 24, 2016 22:19

AWWNAW: Dec 30, 2008

umm satya needs to come to grips with the fact that Tay should be put in charge of MS?

# ? Mar 24, 2016 22:30

Wheany: Mar 17, 2006; Spinya^{ha^{ha^haha}ha}ha_{ha_{ha_haha}ha}ha!; Doctor Rope

flakeloaf posted:

and i'm sure the songs on that ancient vista laptop that makes a business go are all properly licensed and respectful of copyright

why wouldn't they be? :confused:

# ? Mar 24, 2016 22:32

Chris Knight: Jun 5, 2002; me @ ur posts; Fun Shoe

yay I finally got win 7 at work

# ? Mar 24, 2016 22:38

BangersInMyKnickers: Nov 3, 2004; I have a thing for courageous dongles

and only one year after maintstream support finished! good job, local IT

# ? Mar 24, 2016 22:42

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

AWWNAW posted:

umm satya needs to come to grips with the fact that Tay should be put in charge of MS?

how could tay run for vp and run MS?

# ? Mar 24, 2016 22:46

theflyingexecutive: Apr 22, 2007

Siljmonster posted:

embedded tweets won't work if they're deleted

# ? Mar 24, 2016 22:51

Bobby Digital: Sep 4, 2009

# ? Mar 24, 2016 22:55

SO DEMANDING: Dec 27, 2003

PleasureKevin posted:

i'm not sure if it was updating to 10 or not, but why else would there be a windows vista update in 2016

it isn't, only win7 and win8 get the free upgrade

that's just a piece of poo poo os on a piece of poo poo laptop being a lovely pile of poo poo

# ? Mar 24, 2016 23:03

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

Bobby Digital posted:

hahah christ is that one real

i dont look up stuff, ill take your word for it

# ? Mar 25, 2016 02:19

Valeyard: Mar 30, 2012; Grimey Drawer

Yo I put my laptop to sleep but I can still hear the Facebook messenger beeps coming from it, wtf, how do I ACTUALLY put it to sleep?

# ? Mar 25, 2016 02:22

Just-In-Timeberlake: Aug 18, 2003

Valeyard posted:

Yo I put my laptop to sleep but I can still hear the Facebook messenger beeps coming from it, wtf, how do I ACTUALLY put it to sleep?

use a hammer

# ? Mar 25, 2016 02:24

anthonypants: May 6, 2007; by Nyc_Tattoo; Dinosaur Gum

Valeyard posted:

Yo I put my laptop to sleep but I can still hear the Facebook messenger beeps coming from it, wtf, how do I ACTUALLY put it to sleep?

you can go into the power options and tell it to disable wake timers or try this in a powershell window [System.Windows.Forms.Application]::SetSuspendState([System.Windows.Forms.PowerState]::Suspend, $true, $true);

# ? Mar 25, 2016 02:53

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

Valeyard posted:

Yo I put my laptop to sleep but I can still hear the Facebook messenger beeps coming from it, wtf, how do I ACTUALLY put it to sleep?

put it in a shopping bag and hang it outside your window

# ? Mar 25, 2016 02:57

theultimo: Aug 2, 2004; An RSS feed bot who makes questionable purchasing decisions.; Pillbug

Valeyard posted:

Yo I put my laptop to sleep but I can still hear the Facebook messenger beeps coming from it, wtf, how do I ACTUALLY put it to sleep?

unplug ANY device attached

make sure power on lan and power on when power options change are disabled

stop Windows update from hijacking your PC when asleep

disable cortana - it wakes when it thinks hey cortana is said

# ? Mar 25, 2016 03:05

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

say "cortana unplug all devices"

then say "cortana shut down windows update"

then "cortana i want u"

# ? Mar 25, 2016 03:22

kitten emergency: Jan 13, 2008; get meow this wack-ass crystal prison

"cortana, do you and Tay want to hang out later and talk about hitler?"

# ? Mar 25, 2016 04:32

Hugh G. Rectum: Mar 1, 2011

anthonypants posted:

you can go into the power options and tell it to disable wake timers or try this in a powershell window [System.Windows.Forms.Application]::SetSuspendState([System.Windows.Forms.PowerState]::Suspend, $true, $true);

what the gently caress is this garbage syntax, that's worse than obj-c.

# ? Mar 25, 2016 04:52

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

Sudo Echo posted:

what the gently caress is this garbage syntax, that's worse than obj-c.

welcome to powershell

# ? Mar 25, 2016 04:53

pseudorandom name: May 6, 2007

tbf, most of that garbage comes from calling arbitrary CLR methods

# ? Mar 25, 2016 04:55

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

thats literally all powershell is good for though

# ? Mar 25, 2016 05:00

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

well i guess sharepoint admin isn't technically part of the clr but its still got all that crazy namespace poo poo that makes objc look pretty

# ? Mar 25, 2016 05:00

Beeftweeter: Jun 28, 2005; OFFICIAL #1 GNOME FAN

anthonypants posted:

you can go into the power options and tell it to disable wake timers or try this in a powershell window [System.Windows.Forms.Application]::SetSuspendState([System.Windows.Forms.PowerState]::Suspend, $true, $true);

lol

so much easier than using system preferences

# ? Mar 25, 2016 05:26