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hyperhazard posted:Not to mention, what was she menstruating out of? Her urethra? If the hymen pops up and down when you press it with your finger the vagina is not sealed and needs to be reprocessed
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# ? Jul 15, 2016 22:03 |
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# ? May 13, 2024 10:28 |
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I've never come across a vagina that didn't have the tamper-evident seal already broken.
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# ? Jul 15, 2016 22:07 |
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CannedMacabre posted:I've never come across a vagina that didn't have the tamper-evident seal already broken. Good on you. You have to get the sealed ones hot or bang them on hard surfaces, and either way it's a pain in the dick
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# ? Jul 15, 2016 22:26 |
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CannedMacabre posted:I've never come across a vagina that didn't have the tamper-evident seal already broken. grrrrrooooooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnn
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 00:25 |
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I read some book in high school Spanish class that said something like, women in ye olden Spain who weren't virgins would take a pin and poke themselves in the vagina to bleed on their wedding night because to prove they were virgins the white bedsheets had to have blood on them, and they would hang these bloody bedsheets outside the window the day after the wedding. I have no idea whether this is true or not, but it sounds weird Oh and lots of people who say Jews have sex through a hole in a bedsheet. Thin Privilege has a new favorite as of 01:22 on Jul 16, 2016 |
# ? Jul 16, 2016 01:19 |
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TheKennedys posted:I have a really similar quasi-memory about fracturing my nose riding a bike when I was a kid; I told it as absolute truth for 15-20 years, and I had the "bump" in my nose to verify it in my mind (even before I actually did shatter my nose years later), but now that I'm older I start wondering how true the story actually is, or if I even broke it the first time at all. Since I have a real "broke my nose standing still in a meeting room" story now I've stopped telling it, but I'll probably always wonder about it. For as long as I can remember, I've had this childhood memory: I was playing outside, messed around w a sewer grate, the thing fell and four fingers on my left hand got chopped off clean. A couple of years ago, I was talking to some friends, one of those conversations about scars and accidents, so I started telling that story. Halfway through I realised that I still have all of my fingers and that poo poo definitely never happened what the gently caress did you make me believe all my life, brain
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 01:30 |
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Thin Privilege posted:Oh and lots of people who say Jews have sex through a hole in a bedsheet. it's all just a mistranslation. They use the same holes as everybody else
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 01:39 |
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Thin Privilege posted:I read some book in high school Spanish class that said something like, women in ye olden Spain who weren't virgins would take a pin and poke themselves in the vagina to bleed on their wedding night because to prove they were virgins the white bedsheets had to have blood on them, and they would hang these bloody bedsheets outside the window the day after the wedding. I have no idea whether this is true or not, but it sounds weird Anyway, back to some lovely NAR. quote:Jurassic Farce Literally rolling.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 01:39 |
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It's just a bit different since, as we know, Jewish boys have their penises cut off on their 13th birthday.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 01:39 |
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GOTTA STAY FAI posted:Good on you. You have to get the sealed ones hot or bang them on hard surfaces, and either way it's a pain in the dick Please, if it were possible to get a woman hot I'm sure I would have managed it by now.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 02:09 |
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hyperhazard posted:
He was on extacy. They all were
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 02:22 |
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the chaos engine posted:For as long as I can remember, I've had this childhood memory: I was playing outside, messed around w a sewer grate, the thing fell and four fingers on my left hand got chopped off clean. That is as terrifying as it is impressive. Brains are something else.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 03:12 |
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Redcordial posted:Also a friend of mine was racially abused today whilst commuting home, by a man in a suit and tie no less. He had shoved an elderly Chinese lady to the ground, and proceeded to knock into my friend to then let out a racial tirade.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 04:01 |
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Thin Privilege posted:My (least) favorite one was told by I think actually elise but maybe I'm wrong about who it was that posted it. It went along the lines of, "I had this little old lady patient and was trying to get a catheter into her but I couldn't find the hole, then I noticed that there was an intact hymen. I asked her if she was sexually active and she said "yes when I first had sex with my husband it hurt but I thought it was supposed to hurt." Apparently she had been having sex through her urethra for 40 years and didn't know it." I mean, come on. That's loving literally physically impossible. It's been discussed in medical journals, so idk. 50 years on, twice the documented cases.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 04:51 |
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He said the magic word Australia, so that's entirely plausible.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 05:06 |
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Aphrodite posted:He said the magic word Australia, so that's entirely plausible. I believe the
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 05:27 |
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Thin Privilege posted:My (least) favorite one was told by I think actually elise but maybe I'm wrong about who it was that posted it. It went along the lines of, "I had this little old lady patient and was trying to get a catheter into her but I couldn't find the hole, then I noticed that there was an intact hymen. I asked her if she was sexually active and she said "yes when I first had sex with my husband it hurt but I thought it was supposed to hurt." Apparently she had been having sex through her urethra for 40 years and didn't know it." I mean, come on. That's loving literally physically impossible. One I remember hearing is about is "gerbilling" (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gerbilling). I imagine it's related to gay panic stuff in general, but this is another one my dad swore to have seen.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 05:40 |
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Australianquote:This troper goes to an Australian public school - year 10 this year, actually. Anyway, most years, the way the house captains are announced is by just having the principal call out their names and having them walk up to the front all normal-like. This year, we did something different. They started up like they were going to do the normal thing, then two of the house captains came up onto the stage in black clothes and shades and announced a mission - 'jailbreak' one of the other senior students. Cue a vaguely All Your Colours Combined sequence ... then some dude runs in with a fake bomb, plants it on the door to the assembly hall staff room. Everyone ducks. No explosion noise. The dude kicks the door open. The 'captive' walks out. Through all this the Mission Impossible theme is playing. It was stupid and awesome at the same time. Raekuul quote:The following is crossposted from Crowning Moment Of Heartwarming. Raekuul is completely uninvolved. Socking quote:This Troper (I shall use first person from now on, it's easier) as a sixth-grader was a total outcast and disconnected freaky-tall girl - and, come to think of it, I still am. xD But anyway, this status easily landed some pretty stupid rumors; I mostly shrugged them all off, except for one - 'Hey, (Troper), is it true you punched a teacher in third grade?' I got this one from a girl I didn't know. I asked the girl who she heard it from, and actually tracked the trail back to its origin - but that wasn't the C Mo A. The guy who started the rumor was talking to a friend of his. This friend was a total wimp, and so when I loomed ominously over the boy his buddy didn't even try to tell him I was there. He was turned away from me, and I disguised my voice. This insanity ensued... Determinator quote:This troper, who recently got home after curing acute appendicitis, apparently walked around with said appendicitis for four years, as the symptoms began showing four years ago when this troper was thirteen years old. Most who do not treat acute appendicitis is likely to die within in a matter of days or weeks untreated. This troper, Made Of Iron? gently caress no, this troper is GODDAMN IMMORTAL!. As icing on the cake, this troper has never broken a single bone in his body, rarely if ever gets infected by diseases and has a pain threshhold over 9000. This troper thinks a lot of it is related to his status as a Determinator worthy of Bro' Kamina himself. To compensate for it, he's the living embodiment of the Afraid Of Needles trope. Pencil quote:When this troper was at her old school, bad things happened, with a very specific aim. These things included being followed home by one particular group of boys, as well as them following her mum and sister around. They also included knives, once, when she was on her own. This kid, surrounded by his mates, pulled out a penknife on her. She gave him eye contact and simply informed him of the fact that he was never going to use it (whilst secretly panicking and preparing the flight option of the fight-flight-freeze decision), and that if he went now she'd never mention it again (hah). Her judgement was correct; he and his mates walked off looking a bit sheepish (a slightly different kind of sheepish to the JW, it has to be said). Her interactions with a different but, at the same time, very similar group of boys (you know what I mean, right?) resulted in her stabbing the leader in the head with a sharp pencil, making him cry in front of all of his friends. It was very satisfying, and him and his mates left her and her friends well alone after that.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 07:36 |
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The appendicitis troper tale is hilarious, largely because it crosses the line from just "situation extremely unlikely to ever occur" to "literally impossible." I also like how he says he "rarely if ever catches diseases" after saying he suffered from appendicitis for 4 years.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 07:43 |
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Ytlaya posted:The appendicitis troper tale is hilarious, largely because it crosses the line from just "situation extremely unlikely to ever occur" to "literally impossible." I also like how he says he "rarely if ever catches diseases" after saying he suffered from appendicitis for 4 years. The fact that he's saying he had an "acute" illness for four years is making me irrationally annoyed
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 12:09 |
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Xen Tricks posted:The fact that he's saying he had an "acute" illness for four years is making me irrationally annoyed Saying he "cured" acute appendicitis is what's doing it for me.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 12:10 |
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Khazar-khum posted:(a slightly different kind of sheepish to the JW, it has to be said). Her interactions with a different but, at the same time, very similar group of boys (you know what I mean, right?)
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 14:19 |
hyperhazard posted:I mean, virgins aren't more likely to bleed than non-virgins, unless they have a medical condition. I know the STDH thread isn't the place to go into it, but I'd love to know why the bleeding = virgin myth became a thing. I think it's because clumsy, unlubricated sex can result in pain and tearing of the hymen that results in bleeding. Ostensibly a woman is supposed to remain a virgin until her wedding day and the guy banging her probably isn't the smoothest operator in the village/castle/tribe, so he'd make a mess of things so consistently that eventually it becomes "common knowledge" that losing your virginity is bloody and painful and that you're supposed to be tearing the poor girl to shreds with your dick.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 14:35 |
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Tropers seem bizarrely obsessed with pencils. I swear every other story from there has someone getting stabbed with one.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 14:44 |
Telemaze posted:Tropers seem bizarrely obsessed with pencils. I swear every other story from there has someone getting stabbed with one. Most tropers who tell these stories are schoolkids or their time in school had the stories they tell to try and seem badass. Pencils and pens are the only weapons they have available.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 15:08 |
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Xen Tricks posted:The fact that he's saying he had an "acute" illness for four years is making me irrationally annoyed
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 16:53 |
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Knifequote:The second involves a mugger on the NYC subway late at night. The guy pulled a knife on me, and stabbed my right shoulder when I refused to hand over my wallet by saying, "I have no intention of giving you my money. It's bad enough I pay taxes!" I clamped down on the pain long enough to pull the knife out of my shoulder, give the guy a Kubrick Stare over the tops of my glasses, and ask, "Did it ever occur to you that I might be left-handed?" I then drove the knife into his shoulder, broke the blade off, and got off at the next stop to get my shoulder stitched and report the incident to the NYPD. Poker quote:This troper witnessed something that clearly shows that Reality Is Unrealistic. You see, there is a bully/loser that is always playing poker for money during lunch. He and his group of bullies try to occasionally force someone to play with them, so they can basically steal his money.(4 guys playing poker for money against one. Since they share the money they win from the person they force to play, they always end up winning.) One day, a new guy transfered to this trooper's high school. The bullies invited him to play. He accepted. This trooper felt sorry for the new guy. He wasn't very tall, and wasn't very strong either. Then, at the first hand...He bet twenty dollars. Then, that guy laughed and raised the bet to sixty dollars. IN HIGH SCHOOL. DURING LUNCH. The bullies(and everyone watching the game) stared at him for a couple of seconds. The bullies figured he was bluffing. He wasn't. Then he LAUGHED. An Evil Laugh. This troper asked his friend if the transfer student was called Akagi. Before he could answer, the transfer student decided to give them a chance to get their money back. In Black Jack 21. They lost. Then he laughed histerically, took their money and walked away saying that they didn't know what real gambling was like. I swear, if they ever make a Western adaptation of Akagi, they should hire that guy to play Akagi. I'm dead serious. Yale quote:This troper's father was a hippy during the Vietnam War, and he not only lay down on the ground in front of the White House when there were policemen on horses there, but he got arrested, escaped the police van with a bunch of his hippy friends when it got a flat tire, took over a college building, got kicked out of Yale for said college building incident, managed to get out of the draft by saying he was a CO, and got back into Yale all in the same time frame. Conference quote:First, after his parents were unable to go to a Parent-Teacher's meeting, he had to go, and endure a "conference" by a "Psychologist" who claimed that Anime and Videogames were EVIIIILLLLL! Except that he commited the typical mistake of only putting the typical bad examples: Grand Theft Auto on the videogames and Urotsukidoji in the case of anime, and mixing up terms like calling an Otaku a Hikkikomori.. At the end, when people start throwing questions at the presenter, including several who praised the "objectiveness" of the conference, said troper raised up from his chair and asked him: "Excuse me, sir, have you played any videogames or watched any anime?". Said "psychologist" just replied with a simple "No, but I don't need to either play or watch them to know they corrupt our youth". And the troper came back by telling him: "Go play Harvest Moon and tell me about it". Needless to say, the director stepped in and told the psychologist to get out of his school, because he lied and he didn't wanted the school to get corrupted by the influence of liars. Later on, he found out the director of the school actually used to play that same game.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 21:40 |
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I know they're just nerd fantasy. But every single time, they manage to piss me off. Every. Single. Time.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 22:00 |
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Khazar-khum posted:Knife This story owns.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 22:04 |
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flosofl posted:I know they're just nerd fantasy. But every single time, they manage to piss me off. Every. Single. Time. My sighs got louder and my eyes rolled farther into my head with each one. I don't know why this particular group was so incredibly irritating.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 22:08 |
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knife posted:I clamped down on the pain long enough to pull the knife out of my shoulder, give the guy a Kubrick Stare over the tops of my glasses, and ask, "Did it ever occur to you that I might be purely a figment of some sad person's imagination?" and then I disappeared because I don't exist.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 22:10 |
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You see he broke off the knife in the mugger's shoulder because he knew the mugger might be left handed too.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 22:15 |
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quote:Except that he commited the typical mistake of only putting the typical bad examples: Grand Theft Auto on the videogames and Urotsukidoji in the case of anime, and mixing up terms like calling an Otaku a Hikkikomori. In what hosed up idiot nerd word is some obscure horror hentai the "typical bad example" of an anime? Also no western psychologist has ever used the term hikikomori ever, once.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 22:49 |
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Troper tales are my secret pleasure. The best (worst) are the anime ones, where they refer to a character from their favorite anime and/or use anime culture words, which I often have no idea what means. Like the poker story, I have no idea of who Akagi is.quote:This troper witnessed something that clearly shows that Reality Is Unrealistic. You see, there is a bully/loser that is always playing poker for money during lunch. He and his group of bullies try to occasionally force someone to play with them, so they can basically steal his money.(4 guys playing poker for money against one. Since they share the money they win from the person they force to play, they always end up winning.) One day, a new guy transfered to this trooper's high school. The bullies invited him to play. He accepted. This trooper felt sorry for the new guy. He wasn't very tall, and wasn't very strong either. Then, at the first hand...He bet twenty dollars. Then, that guy laughed and raised the bet to sixty dollars. IN HIGH SCHOOL. DURING LUNCH. The bullies(and everyone watching the game) stared at him for a couple of seconds. The bullies figured he was bluffing. He wasn't. Then he LAUGHED. An Evil Laugh. This troper asked his friend if the transfer student was called Akagi. Before he could answer, the transfer student decided to give them a chance to get their money back. In Black Jack 21. They lost. Then he laughed histerically, took their money and walked away saying that they didn't know what real gambling was like. I swear, if they ever make a Western adaptation of Akagi, they should hire that guy to play Akagi. I'm dead serious. or the the conference story, I don't know what a Hikkikomori is or how it differs from an otaku. Yet somehow this makes the stories better in my broken brain.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 22:54 |
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Atreiden posted:Troper tales are my secret pleasure. The best (worst) are the anime ones, where they refer to a character from their favorite anime and/or use anime culture words, which I often have no idea what means. Like the poker story, I have no idea of who Akagi is. I love that because he doesn't even name drop the series, even for things I know random names referenced don't usually make sense. Also Otaku is an idiot anime nerd that occasionally goes outside, hikikomori is an idiot anime nerd that is terrified of the outside world and hasn't left their room in literal years, also known as NEET. Weird people online fetishize it and the ideal of being an entirely broken hermit person. Why, who knows Xen Tricks has a new favorite as of 23:09 on Jul 16, 2016 |
# ? Jul 16, 2016 23:06 |
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Atreiden posted:Troper tales are my secret pleasure. The best (worst) are the anime ones, where they refer to a character from their favorite anime and/or use anime culture words, which I often have no idea what means. Like the poker story, I have no idea of who Akagi is. Akagi is a gambling manga. As expected, it's completely irrelevant to the story but he mentioned it because tropers can't have a single conversation without referencing something.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 23:27 |
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Tunicate posted:You see he broke off the knife in the mugger's shoulder because he knew the mugger might be left handed too. I like how if you imagine that story actually happening, the mugger just sort of jabbed the troper with the knife and then stood there listening while the troper said "Have you considered that I might be left-handed" and then stabbed them.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 23:27 |
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Xen Tricks posted:I love that because he doesn't even name drop the series, even for things I know random names referenced don't usually make sense. No, NEET stands for "not in employment, education, or training" and is someone who is--wait for it--not in employment, education or training. There's overlap between the two groups (in that hikikomori are almost certainly NEET), but they're not the same thing.
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# ? Jul 16, 2016 23:40 |
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Hikikomori basically just means shut-in, but to the extent that you never go outside, and have parents (or other caretakers) who provide for you but otherwise pretend you don't exist. It's an appealing livelihood to a very certain kind of person.
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# ? Jul 17, 2016 00:13 |
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# ? May 13, 2024 10:28 |
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Weatherman posted:No, NEET stands for "not in employment, education, or training" and is someone who is--wait for it--not in employment, education or training. There's overlap between the two groups (in that hikikomori are almost certainly NEET), but they're not the same thing. Yeah it's not technically the same thing but psychological usage of the term and fat man child usage of the term mean two different things. Most people mentioning NEET in this sort of context consider it pretty much a synonym for hikikomori
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# ? Jul 17, 2016 00:32 |