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Dexo posted:Hillary's gotta walk out to Takeover if she's gonna put Trump on the Summer Jam screen like that. Hillary is seated in a high back chair, swirling a single malt, neet, while watching a montage reel projected on the wall across from her of all the poo poo republicans have said about her and her family over the decades. Every hour they bring in some college republican they've rounded up wearing only white boxers and a black hood with the likeness of Limbaugh screen printed on it. They stand him there to the side of the flickering screen and hand her the gold plated glock that use to belong to Qaddafi and quickly leave the room. The young man finally breaks his silence by asking where he is when all the sudden they hear a chain of shots ring out barely masking the wail of a mother who has just lost her only child screaming "WHO'S THE FIRST DOG NOW MOTHER FUCKER" followed only by a rapid succession of high pitched clicks as the gun has no more bullets to fire into the heap of now dead flesh on the floor. They know to wait 5 minutes before entering the room, and before them is Hillary, still sitting in the high back chair, slowly swirling her glass, staring intently at the flashes of color before her. The reel stops, the projection goes to white, she swallows the last bit if liquid fire and walks out on stage where she hears a song from her youth... 5 to 1 by The Doors made hip again for the younger audience. She pauses, the corner of her mouth raises to a smile, and then walks out into the bright lights of the convention. A Winner is Jew fucked around with this message at 19:19 on Jul 28, 2016 |
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Jul 28, 2016 19:14
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Man, if our politics took place in the wrestling reality, they might actually be a little more functional, tbh
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Jul 28, 2016 19:21
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A Winner is Jew posted:Hillary is seated in a high back chair, swirling a single malt, neet, while watching a montage reel projected on the wall across from her of all the poo poo republicans have said about her and her family over the decades. Every hour they bring in some college republican they've rounded up wearing only white boxers and a black hood with the likeness of Limbaugh screen printed on it. They stand him there to the side of the flickering screen and hand her the gold plated glock that use to belong to Qaddafi and quickly leave the room. The young man finally breaks his silence by asking where he is when all the sudden they hear a chain of shots ring out barely masking the wail of a mother who has just lost her only child screaming "WHO'S THE FIRST DOG NOW MOTHER FUCKER" followed only by a rapid succession of high pitched clicks as the gun has no more bullets to fire into the heap of now dead flesh on the floor. They know to wait 5 minutes before entering the room, and before them is Hillary, still sitting in the high back chair, slowly swirling her glass, staring intently at the flashes of color before her. The reel stops, the projection goes to white, she swallows the last bit if liquid fire and walks out on stage where she hears a song from her youth... 5 to 1 by The Doors made hip again for the younger audience. She pauses, the corner of her mouth raises to a smile, and then walks out into the bright lights of the convention. this is an actual thing that you wrote
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Jul 28, 2016 19:23
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8-Bit Scholar posted:this is an actual thing that you wrote It's called humor. Something you wouldn't know the first loving thing about.
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Jul 28, 2016 19:25
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Remember that if elected, it will be the DoJ of President Clinton likely investigating the Title IX failings/coverup of Baylor University and former President/Chancellor Kenneth Starr. Yes, that Ken Starr.
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Jul 28, 2016 19:29
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go3 posted:Remember that if elected, it will be the DoJ of President Clinton likely investigating the Title IX failings/coverup of Baylor University and former President/Chancellor Kenneth Starr. Yes, that Ken Starr. oh poo poo good point
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Jul 28, 2016 19:32
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go3 posted:Remember that if elected, it will be the DoJ of President Clinton likely investigating the Title IX failings/coverup of Baylor University and former President/Chancellor Kenneth Starr. Yes, that Ken Starr. The Purge: Election Year. 
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Jul 28, 2016 19:34
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go3 posted:Remember that if elected, it will be the DoJ of President Clinton likely investigating the Title IX failings/coverup of Baylor University and former President/Chancellor Kenneth Starr. Yes, that Ken Starr. May death come swiftly to her enemies!
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Jul 28, 2016 19:34
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https://twitter.com/politico/status/758731017456791556
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Jul 28, 2016 19:36
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Typo posted:I read kyle's book and holy poo poo he's self-congratulatory as gently caress like at one point he's all like "so yeah my squad is trying to get a kill with every weapon we got issued" and I was like wtf does this guy think this is COD irl?  Anybody who claimed they shot victims of a natural disaster on American soil should have been immediately discounted as a psychopath and shunned every time he appeared outside of his home but..
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Jul 28, 2016 19:36
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https://twitter.com/mollyesque/status/758487079663702016 Is Tim Kaine even real
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Jul 28, 2016 19:38
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John Popper for Secretary of Outdoor Music Festivals.
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Jul 28, 2016 19:39
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Ok this part in particular has 100% won me over: quote:"Some of the things he says about me, my response is, quote, yawn, close quote but this is a -- it's a dangerous race," Kaine said, turning serious. "It's an existential choice for the country about, do you want to bring torture back? In Virginia we care a lot about religious liberty. Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, people should be able to worship the way they want or not and they shouldn’t be preferred or punished." So perfect.
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Jul 28, 2016 19:40
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seiferguy posted:https://twitter.com/mollyesque/status/758487079663702016 He literally sounds like what the Onion makes Joe Biden out to be.
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Jul 28, 2016 19:40
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SpaceDrake posted:Man, if our politics took place in the wrestling reality, they might actually be a little more functional, tbh After watching his last speech Obama's finisher would clearly the be the BURRRRRNIIIIIING HAAAMMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jfsmKdh5YAk
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Jul 28, 2016 19:41
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Dexo posted:He literally sounds like what the Onion makes Joe Biden out to be.
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Jul 28, 2016 19:43
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yNwdhK5UKec
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Jul 28, 2016 19:45
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John Oliver on Tim Kaine. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R4jYBKg-7_8
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Jul 28, 2016 19:45
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Trabisnikof posted:Ok this part in particular has 100% won me over: I was a fan of quote:"But look, basic civics, 50 states. You have to give a guy a break who's only into politics the last few months and not that well-informed," Its such a golly gee dagger
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Jul 28, 2016 19:47
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I want maximum hilarity from the Trump bashing in Hillary's speech tonight -- if her speech is one minute longer than The Donald's and has a minute's more applause, that would be great because you know it would enrage him after that commercial he put out after his speech. The even better response would be something akin to 'and just so The Donald knows, it isn't how long you speak for, it's the words you say.' The perfect response would be for her to come out to all the music and wave at the crowd and take five or 10 minutes absorbing the applause at the podium, have a picture of Trump come up on the main screen, have her look at it and say 'this guy?!', cackle and laugh and walk away from the podium shaking her head, waving to the crowd as a soaring orchestral score plays her off...
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Jul 28, 2016 19:49
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His line about Muslims this week and Mormons next week has to be an intentional bullhorn pointed at Utah. I don't know what's more hilarious, that Trump could lose Utah to Johnson or that Georgia is inching towards battleground status. e: A Winner is Jew posted:John Oliver on Tim Kaine. Odds that John Olvier has already invited him on to his show with the stipulation that he has to do a harmonica solo for him? Evil Fluffy fucked around with this message at 19:57 on Jul 28, 2016 |
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Jul 28, 2016 19:52
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Christ https://twitter.com/IsaacDovere/status/758723081628254210
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Jul 28, 2016 19:59
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Evil Fluffy posted:Odds that John Olvier has already invited him on to his show with the stipulation that he has to do a harmonica solo for him? If there is any justice in the world, he'll do it. And immediately after Hillary says 'we need this man for president' and switches titles with him.
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Jul 28, 2016 19:59
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Stupid loving idiotic children. Won't have to look for the crying baby tonight because it'll be right up there front and centre. Hopefully they get moved somehow.
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Jul 28, 2016 20:01
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When's that “fart-in” scheduled again
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Jul 28, 2016 20:01
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Showing up early just helps the DNC officials filter out the normal Bernie delegates from the crazies.
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Jul 28, 2016 20:03
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It's insane just how blind the Bernie Bros (at the convention) are to their own antics now. It's a objective fact that anything they do tonight will have no effect other than giving conservatives something to laugh at and diminish whatever point they at one point wanted to make. And yet they still do it. Hmm. e: don't be surprised to see them throw poo poo at Hillary/on the stage.
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Jul 28, 2016 20:04
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I hope none of them are using fart powder for their shart-in, cause that stuff will straight up make you poo poo your pants.
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Jul 28, 2016 20:05
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Why can't they just pull their loving credentials already?
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Jul 28, 2016 20:05
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I would be genuinely surprised if the DNC just sits back and lets this happen
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Jul 28, 2016 20:07
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BetterToRuleInHell posted:e: don't be surprised to see them throw poo poo at Hillary/on the stage. The electrical arcs from the Secret Service tazers would probably short out the entire arena if they tried something like that. It's been awhile since we've seen those guys in action, I'm kind of curious to see what it would be like...
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Jul 28, 2016 20:10
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They can, and should, pull the credentials of anyone who follows through on this. After last night no one is on their side anymore. Keeping a few hundred dumbasses from bitching on the internet is not worth potentially marring Hillary's biggest speech of the election.
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Jul 28, 2016 20:10
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Shimrra Jamaane posted:Why can't they just pull their loving credentials already? Because that looks way worse and actually gets news time. Supression and all of that. If they just let them boo, and Hillary handles it well it's nullified. Outside of the usual suspects anyway. And she has to know and have preparations for the booing.
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Jul 28, 2016 20:10
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Mel Mudkiper posted:I would be genuinely surprised if the DNC just sits back and lets this happen
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Jul 28, 2016 20:11
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Dexo posted:Because that looks way worse and actually gets news time. Supression and all of that. They could always just reseat them.
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Jul 28, 2016 20:11
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Mel Mudkiper posted:I would be genuinely surprised if the DNC just sits back and lets this happen Hilarity would be if the DNC sent out that message just to round those cocks up and give them the boot. They're just protestors now, they belong outside with all the rest of the protestors.
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Jul 28, 2016 20:11
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Dexo posted:Because that looks way worse and actually gets news time. Supression and all of that. She's going to give them the mom stare. Not the "clean your room" mom stare, the "you just knocked up your prom date" mom stare.
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Jul 28, 2016 20:12
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What happened to Nina Turner? I vaguely remember A THING.
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Jul 28, 2016 20:12
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Casimir Radon posted:They may send in Sanders to to talk them down, but I doubt they'll listen to him. Just have Sanders sit front row center, then they would have to poop themselves right next to their (former) hero.
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Jul 28, 2016 20:14
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Casimir Radon posted:They may send in Sanders to to talk them down, but I doubt they'll listen to him. Have Bernie come out with her and just sit in a chair in front of the podium just off camera and glare at them the whole speech.
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Jul 28, 2016 20:14
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