Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

This is probably the most specific fetish of all time. Where does it end? Like, is that cashier at Whole Foods getting a little tingle when I use my card before the transaction finishes?

"23F non/smoker looking for strong, dominant card slider. Safety phrase:. 'You'll have to slide it again, these things never work right.'"

quote:

Well Reddit, I'm pretty mortified about posting this, but I'm so utterly confused by this incident that I need some fresh perspectives. Sorry for the length.
So anyway - Jake and I have been close friends for about three years. We met working at the same coffee shop in college and remained in the same city. We don't hang out as often as we used to anymore, but it's still great catching up and hitting the bars with each other every once in a while. Our relationship is completely platonic. Jake is gay.
Six months ago Jake and I went out for a night on the town. He offered me his couch to crash on for the night so I could sober up before driving home in the morning. I thanked him for the offer and I crashed.
Eight a.m. arrives and I get a frantic call from my friend who's crying incomprehensibly over the phone. I'm pretty concerned so I shoot Jake (who hasn't woken up yet) a quick text saying that I needed to rush out of his apartment, but thanks again for letting me stay over. I hop in my car, drive over to my friend Hannah's place. It turns out that she has had a messy fight with her boyfriend and they've just broken up, so I just hang out with Hannah for a bit and comfort her.
Then I go to the bathroom after feeling "off." It turns out my period's come a week early, and my underwear had a bit of blood on it. Enough to be noticeable, but not an awful amount. I sheepishly tell Hannah what just happened, she laughs and hands me a tampon. I assume that my period has just started and after checking around Hannah's floor, where we had been sitting, to make sure there weren't any stains, I go right back to comforting her.
So maybe it should have occurred to me to ask, "Jake, did I leave any stains on your couch?" at this point. It didn't, because I was too focused on Hannah. But LUCKILY for me, about an hour later Jake sends me a stunning barrage of texts calling me disrespectful and disgusting for bleeding on his couch and not telling him. I obviously had no idea. So what do I do? Take responsibility for bleeding, offer to clean the couch or pay for its cleaning or even to replace the entire couch itself, apologize, and tell him I just hadn't realized I had bled on it because I hadn't even anticipated my period coming early. Jake never responds.
This is where it, to me, just gets bizarre. Jake tells a bevy of our mutual friends that he wants to end our friendship with me because of "my disrespectful actions." He shows them the texts he sent me. According to my mutual friends, what they told him upon seeing the texts was something like "Jake, we actually can't believe you would send that to her. You sound insane in these texts, and she obviously didn't do it on purpose. You are being an rear end in a top hat." Jake apparently got huffy with them and said, "really? You think I'm being irrational here?" I think, maybe my girlfriends are being overly sympathetic because they're women. I want to understand why Jake would be so upset. I tell my boyfriend and his friends what happened. They are also all aghast and think Jake is crazy.
Again, Jake never responded to my apology. I sent him 10 apologetic texts, telling him I was also open to having a conversation and hearing him out about what upset him, and how I could be a better friend to him, until I decided I need to let him have his space. I ask our mutual friends, "Maybe Jake has wanted to end his friendship with me all along, and just needed a reason why? Maybe he doesn't think I'm a good friend or something?" Hannah and another girl told me, "Jake called you one of his best friends literally three days before this incident happened when we were hanging out with him. And then he told us he was excited to see you and that you were an awesome girl." So maybe I can rule that theory out lol.
It has literally been SIX months Reddit. I find this whole thing absolutely bizarre. Jake, for the first two months, completely ignored me when he saw me in person. Then, for two months after that, would hug me and say hi every time he saw me in person. Tbh I was so weirded out by this that I didn't even pull him aside to ask what gives, so I was friendly and cordial back though kind of unnerved. Then, last month, Jake removed me from all social media. But still says hi to me when he sees me in person and seems friendly.
Honestly, I don't even know what I'm asking here. I guess my questions are this: 1) does anyone know what exactly would compel Jake to act like this, given that he has no history of treating me like this during our friendship? 2) did I actually gently caress up really badly? Should I have taken more steps to rectify the situation? Maybe Jake really loving loved that couch and I committed a mortal sin there. 3) Just...what? I told Jake I was open to having a conversation with him and said I was sorry. Then offered him money to clean OR replace his Ikea couch. I honestly don't understand his actions after this entire incident.
So I'm sad. Sad about the end of the friendship, but also just...confused. This was so inexplicable. I keep racking my head for times I was a bad friend that would justify Jake's behavior - I'm sure I have been, I'm not perfect and I recognize that and would like to work on it - but am I still right by saying this was completely out of nowhere? Tbh though, after this, I'm not trying to be friends again. I just want some insight from other people, since Jake refuses to have a conversation with me.
tl;dr: Accidentally had my period on my friend's couch. He freaked out, I apologized, he's acting weird. Can someone help me understand his behavior? And did I actually do something really wrong?

Gaunab posted:

Shut the gently caress up about healsluts and overwatch


Do you guys think I'm just being insecure

Lockback posted:

Here is a good case against a Hillary presidency, what with her bleeding all over priceless heirlooms and whatnot.


My [24 F] close friend of three years [24 M] ended our friendship because of my period

quote:

Then offered him money to clean OR replace his Ikea couch.

Troposphere posted:

I was looking through the mei tag on tumblr because I main her and she is good and I saw a pic of someone sticking an icicle up her vag

I just had to share that because it is haunting me and now you guys get to have that mental image too

icicles do not belong there

Gaunab posted:

Shut the gently caress up about healsluts and overwatch

quote:

My GF and I have been dating 7 months long distance relationship (We do visit each other off and on(. I knew she used to like MMOs but it was never this bad. Since the release of Overwatch things have completely changed.

I have dizziness issues so I can not play with her and she is spending 8+ hours per day playing the game. Any excess free time it seems she spends watching streams of the game, talking to people about it while on call with me while hearing 25% of what I say. I have brought it up with her and she assures me it was just because of the Overwatch hype but it has been going on for two weeks and I am growing to resent the game.

Our time together consists of mostly being on discord call at 3 am after all of the people she plays with has gone to sleep and she is so tired she passes out within 5 minutes. I wake up before her in the morning and am waiting for her while reading the news/whatever but for her first thing out of bed she is launching Overwatch playing with AI or randoms. Then she gets ready for work, gets home, has a meal and am playing with her friends.

I feel more and more pushed out of the relationship like I do not hold any weight whatsoever. She gets very lovey dovey when she is not playing in the five or so minutes before she passes out which just pulls me back in.

I feel a bit stuck to be honest. I do care deeply for her and it seems like she does as well for me but our relationship is not progressing. It is going backwards if anything. I don't want to say something radical like let's break up and later grow to regret it but every single day I constantly stalk discord to see if she is still playing. I've tried talking to her on call while she is playing, leaving messages so she can respond in between games. She is just so engrossed in the game there is no time for that. I just end up sitting there waiting for her to reply until I give up and jump in bed. Tossing and turning unable to sleep. Checking discord on mobile every half hour because maybe she is done and we can sleep together like we have done every night since we started dating

tl;dr: GF spends 8+ hours playing Overwatch. Confidence going down, feel like I hold no weight whatsoever to her. Considering breaking up but do not want to do anything radical that I may grow to regret.

Dial-a-Dog posted:

Me [24 M] with my girlfriend [21 F] falling apart due to Overwatch

Guy should explore healslutting his girlfriend

Troposphere posted:

she should date me instead

HardDiskD posted:

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

Updated from flirting gf-chest toucher:

Updat: My girlfriend [22F] flirts with guys and I'm [28M] at my limit. Now on lockdown

loquacius posted:

So wait is your Overwatch avatar and gang tag not necessarily related to your main character, and if not what is it, just like the one you like the best or what

loquacius posted:

So wait is your Overwatch avatar and gang tag not necessarily related to your main character, and if not what is it, just like the one you like the best or what

loquacius posted:

Also video games can be a better hobby than most w/r/t spending time with your S/O, because if they want to do something with you you can say "ok gimme ten minutes" and then be ready to go, whereas if your hobby is, eg, that you're in a community bowling league or something that's not an option

but the thing is you have to, y'know, be willing to do that

quote:

Being A Healslut While In A Relationship; Cheating?

22 yr old female, bi here. I have weirdly found this community since a friend of mine kept joking about me being the group healslut in our overwatch games, as I only ever played Mercy. I googled healslut and found this. I have played healer in every online game i've played since I started playing online games while I was 14. I always found comfort in keeping the group alive and would often get a weird thrill since the OW launch where my friends would often humorously go "I love you," "gently caress me," etc when I ressed them and feel huge guilt when it was clear i'd ruined things for people by playing badly. I think this means I have always silently been into this kind of thing.

Anyways, I have been playing a lot with that friend who introduced the healslut community to me (even though he thinks that I too find it a joke). Whenever he jokes about me being his healslut, getting a collar with his name on it, or him protecting me, I find myself very turned on. Occasionally flirting with this individual (though under the backup of "it's justa joke brah)

The thing is, I am in a committed relationship. Is this considered cheating? I don't want to be unfaithful but, at the same time this isn't something I can really help having a reaction to.

loquacius posted:

Also video games can be a better hobby than most w/r/t spending time with your S/O, because if they want to do something with you you can say "ok gimme ten minutes" and then be ready to go

P-Mack posted:

But the bowling league thing helps you make friends and stuff, and people with friends who participate in the local community are usually way more fun than people who just play video games all day.

And theres basically no limit on how much time you can spend gaming, so it can really gently caress up people with addictive personalities or a depression spiral, more so than bowling or canoeing or something with practical constraints on it will.

Naerasa posted:

hahahaha just kidding they're two hours deep in the middle of an eight hour raid

quote:

well, i have a bf, we are going out for 3 months, i love him very much, but i don't like his smell at all. it reminds me of garbage. when i hugged him in bed, from behind, i snuggled my face up his neck and i immediately turned away, turns out the really hideous smell comes from a little bump he has there.
i asked him about that, he said he have had this bump for over 8 years now, and that he even went to a doctor to check out it wasn't cancer (it wasn't, just "fat"). he said that no one ever told him that is smells bad (girlfriends, other people, ever).

anyway, this matter really damages our intimacy, every time i meet him i have this worry, about how bad he is going to smell this time. the smell does spread (even when avoiding getting close to his neck), or maybe i don't like his natural odor as well, i don't know.

i don't want to be pushy with him, about that, i don't want to make him do a surgery to take off the bump. i am attracted to him but the smell really ruins it. one time he came hugging kissing and that, and i smelled that, so i stopped everything and told him. he got into a really bad mood, saying he feels i am not attraced to him, and that i could keep that information until later.

i don't know what to do. i love him... i really do. and i AM attracted to him physically. (but, the kissing is bad as well, we rarely kiss)
i would like some advice.

(p.s: i liked the odor & kissing my ex bf, but the relationship sucked. i don't want to let this kind of things change that much... but turns out it does change. i am frustrated).

tl;dr: Mandatory summary/question!

i love my bf, but i don't like his smell. what to do?

quote:

it doesn't look like something you could squeeze. the skin looks the same actually, it's something inside that changes the surface (about 1/4 of tennis ball)

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

There is some sort of genetic thing where people smell like rotten fish/garbage, I forgot what it's called

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

Me [23 F] in a relationship with [36 M], love him but doesn't like his smell

Pretty sure this is a cyst, I've been told they smell bad which just thinking about it makes my skin crawl.

loquacius posted:

So wait is your Overwatch avatar and gang tag not necessarily related to your main character, and if not what is it, just like the one you like the best or what

HardDiskD posted:

Is it just me that's weirded out by the age difference?

Leon Einstein posted:

Goddamn, get some self respect. There are reasons guys in their upper 30s can't or won't date women their own age. None are good.

My (26M) girlfriend (27F) thinks she has body dysmorphia... she's just overweight. I don't know what to do. posted:

Been with Stephanie (name changed for privacy) for a little over 3 years. More or less relationship is good, she tends to be way overdramatic when we fight (which isn't often) but I can usually talk her down and things work out.

When Stephanie and I first started dating she mentioned a few times in kind of a mysterious (I thought it was attention-seeking, still do) way that she had some kind of mental illness or mental health struggle. Eventually (probably two or three months in) she came out and told me in a really serious conversation that she has body dysmorphia and thinks she's obese and hates herself for it.

Now let me be clear, I love her the way she is, wouldn't change a thing, I don't mind her weight whatsoever. But even when she said it initially, I almost thought it was a joke. Stephanie is obese. I'm not good at guessing weight and she's never told me her weight, but I know she's 5'4 and a size 22 in pants (US). She's by all standards obese. I don't mind it at all. I'm attracted to her, I think she's beautiful, I would never ask her to change a thing.

It didn't come up again for a while but last fall she took a psychology course for her college degree and they talked about mental illness and it came back up. She came in one night almost happy? in a weird way, saying that she understands everything that's wrong with her because they talked about BD in class and it all makes sense. She has never been diagnosed by a medical professional and can't see a doctor for lack of health insurance.

Ever since then, she talks about it a lot. I'm not one to poke at people just to poke, so I just let it be. But she talks about it all the time. She blames arguments we have on her BD. She uses it as an excuse to eat poorly and not take care of herself, because she is straight up convinced that she is smaller than she is and that the person she sees in the mirror is a dysmorphic situation. She is part of an online BD support group and talks openly to me about how she's met people who finally understand her, and she gives them advice and guidance based on her "struggle" with BD. She's pointed to actresses like Mindy Kalling and compared the actress's body to her "actual" body (vs. BD body) and says it's nice to see herself represented on screen. No offense intended to my girlfriend, but that's not her body type. She is much bigger than that.

I'm getting to the point where I don't know what to do. She uses it as an excuse for all her behavior. I honestly don't know if she truly thinks she has BD or if she just uses it to justify herself. When we first moved in together, she would cover all the sizes on the tags of her clothes with Sharpie so I wouldn't see them. She's since stopped doing that (or only does it when she remembers), but it made me think she might be aware of her size and just tries to pretend she has BD so no one can talk to her about it.

I know this is a weird situation. I'd like to get her or us into counseling but she doesn't have insurance and goes to a community college that doesn't offer student mental health services. I'm not sure what to do.

TL;DR Girlfriend uses body dysmorphia as an excuse for everything, but she's not dysmorphic, she's just overweight.

Leon Einstein posted:

My wife is 6 years younger than me. Am I the creepy old guy?

Jack Trades posted:

Your age / 2 + 7 is still the rule of thumb I think?