s.i.r.e. posted:

As someone who enjoys stupid action films, tons of CGI and stupid plots Jurassic World is a turd. Jurassic Park films have likeable characters and Jurassic World only has one, so you have 2 hours of dumb characters doing dumb poo poo but you don't care for any of them and everyone except Chris Pratt should have been eaten 5 minutes into the film. They should have also cut an hour out of it to make it thing watchable.

Super No Vacancy posted:

good star wars movie

oddium posted:

i've watched jurassic park a lot and everything up until right after the trex scene is super good. from after the trex escape onward...

oddium posted:

i've watched jurassic park a lot and everything up until right after the trex scene is super good. from after the trex escape onward...

Intel&Sebastian posted:

I will not sit here and let you speak about Samuel L Jacksons arms' scene like this

TheScott2K posted:

I didn't like how that one lady got eaten. She was just doing her job and was planning a wedding. Bryce Dallas Howard's character should be in prison in the sequel.

Guy Goodbody posted:

It was kinda hosed up that the only really gruesome death in the movie happened to that lady. The cowards and corrupt people who caused all the mess got off with quick and painless deaths, the lady who was a bit of a bridezilla and wouldn't let her fiance have a bachelor party got a 30 second long sequence where she died horribly. Combine that with businesswoman's arc about how she can't be happy unless she settles for whatever man will have her and pops out some kids, I think it's fair to call Jurassic World Problematic

Guy Goodbody posted:

It was kinda hosed up that the only really gruesome death in the movie happened to that lady. The cowards and corrupt people who caused all the mess got off with quick and painless deaths, the lady who was a bit of a bridezilla and wouldn't let her fiance have a bachelor party got a 30 second long sequence where she died horribly. Combine that with businesswoman's arc about how she can't be happy unless she settles for whatever man will have her and pops out some kids, I think it's fair to call Jurassic World Problematic

eonwe posted:

i havent followed this since like, the announced it

what good poo poo have i missed

eonwe posted:

i havent followed this since like, the announced it

what good poo poo have i missed

eonwe posted:

i see. are these leaks or whatever im hearing about possibly real or probably not

i may just ignore this stuff until the nintendo direct

eonwe posted:

i see. are these leaks or whatever im hearing about possibly real or probably not

i may just ignore this stuff until the nintendo direct

quote:

I spent the entire first act of the script thinking I had it figured out. I knew where it was going. Problem was, every time I thought I had it figured out, something happened that seemed to change the entire premise of the movie.
The script starts at a Little League game somewhere in America, an idyllic scene that quickly goes bad when pterosaurs attack the kids and their parents. It’s a cool scene, and I couldn’t help but immediately anticipate what might lay ahead. Dinosaurs in America. All-out warfare on home soil. This should be fun. In a series of television clips, we learn that this is the first attack on North American ground following months of this sort of thing in Central America and Mexico. The UN has created a task force to exterminate the dinosaurs. Awesome, I thought. A bad-rear end heavily-armed United Nations task force versus the dinosaurs. Bring it on! But then the script throws its first major curve ball, introducing Nick Harris, an unemployed soldier of fortune. Nick’s the lead in the movie. Not Alan Grant. Not Ian Malcolm. Despite all the rumors to the contrary, those characters are not back for this film. Instead, we meet Nick as he watches those same reports on TV that we are. He’s approached by an ex-commander of his and offered a meeting about a job. He’s warned that the guy he’d be working for is a little bit strange...

... which brings us to John Hammond. It’s a great cameo role for Richard Attenborough, and he’s said several times that he is looking forward to it. In the script’s single wittiest scene, we catch up with the eccentric ex-billionaire who is now the most-sued man in history according to the Guiness Book Of World Records. He’s been declared incompetent by his heirs and his company has been taken over by other corporations. Technically, Jurassic Park isn’t even his problem anymore, but he still feels responsible for the dinosaurs and the damage they do. Hammond’s got a big idea: breed some new dinosaurs that can’t reproduce and introduce them into the wild population. A Judas strain that will kill off the dinosaurs within one generation. Easy enough, except the UN has outlawed any breeding of new dinosaurs by anyone and they’ve prohibited the sale, mining, or possession of amber worldwide. Hammond’s got scientists ready and waiting to go, but he needs genetic material to work with. As soon as Hammond mentions where that material might come from, I thought for sure that I was ahead of the script again. Oh, of course! The shaving cream can that Nedry stole. He’s going to hire this guy to put together a team of mercenaries, and they’re going to spend the whole film on Isla Nublar getting picked off one-by-one while trying to find the samples.
After all, the first three films are all pretty much carbon copies of each other, excuses to turn people loose on the island. I almost set the script down at that point, disappointed that they’d do something so predictable again after all this talk about how they were going to turn things upside down. Page sixteen, and I was sure I knew the rest of the script without even reading it.
But I was wrong... again.

Nick Harris does indeed got to Isla Nublar, but he goes alone. He does indeed track down the shaving cream can that Nedry stole, but that’s a mere five pages later. And as soon as he finds it, he’s attacked not only by excavaraptors (think trapdoor spiders), but also by security rangers who work for Grendel Corporation, the mysterious Swiss holding company that took over Jurassic Park from Hammond. Seems they want those genetic samples for their own purposes... whatever those may be. Nick has to get off the island, evading his pursuers, human or otherwise. He manages to make it back to the mainland just long enough to hide the shaving cream can before the security team catches up with him and gasses him into unconsciousness.

All of that happens by page 39, at which point I realized I had no idea where this thing was going, and I quit trying to guess. It kept confounding my expectations. It certainly didn’t feel like it was just another rehash of the same formula. When Nick wakes up, he’s in the tower of a medieval castle in the Alps. Seriously. That’s the precise moment when the entire enterprise goes so over-the-top loony that you’ll either go along with it for the entire insane ride or reject it roundly as a big bag of ludicrous. Nick is introduced to Adrien Joyce, the major domo henchman of Baron von Drax, CEO of the Grendel Corporation. Joyce isn’t a moustache-twirling bad guy bent on torturing Nick into revealing where he hid the shaving cream can. Instead, he offers Nick a job, and in order to explain the job to him, he has to take him on a tour of the entire castle, which turns out to be a fairly sophisticated genetics lab where Grendel Corporation has been breeding some dinosaurs of their own design, cross-breeds that never existed in any era of nature with all sorts of custom modifications.

I want to tread lightly on what happens over the course of the rest of the film on the off chance that Mary Parent or someone at Universal is seriously going to make this thing. There’s the eight-year-old-boy side of me that thinks that a DIRTY DOZEN-style mercenary team of hyper-smart dinosaurs in body armor killing drug dealers and rescuing kidnapped children will be impossible to resist. And then there’s the side of me that says... WHAT THE gently caress ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! Nick is put in charge of training these five dinosaurs, X1 through X5, and the first thing he does is name them. “Any soldier worth his pay has a name to answer to, not a number,” he says. So we are introduced to Achilles, Hector, Perseus, Orestes, and Spartacus, each of them a specially created deinonychus, which is sort of like a miniature T-rex. They have super-sensitive smell and hearing, incredible strength and speed and pack-hunting instincts, and they have modified forelegs, lengthened and topped with more dextrous fingers, as well as dog DNA for increased obedience and human DNA so they can solve problems well. All of this is topped off with a drug-regulating implant that can dose them with adrenaline or serotonin as the situation demands.
And go ahead. Look at the calendar. We’re a long, long way from April 1st right now.

By the end of the film, there are set pieces that are much, much bigger than anything we’ve seen in the other films, and much crazier. They’re all well-written, and there’s a glee to the bloodletting that you have to admire. There’s also a blatant set-up for a JURASSIC PARK 5 that is just too good for the studio to pass up. That is, of course, if they actually decide to make this one.

eonwe posted:

i havent followed this since like, the announced it

what good poo poo have i missed

Stux posted:

Bombadilillo posted:

Bringing it back to video games, I have wanted a Far Cry style open world set in overrun Jurassic Park 10 years later. I got Far Cry Primal which was a thing, but full Jurassic Park would be great.

Bombadilillo posted:

She has been 100% on Switch so far, including breaking...everything about it.

quote:

Gamble also shot down plans for a version of Andromeda on Nintendo’s hybrid console, the Switch.

“Yeah, not right now, no,” he said. “We’re not planning on it. If the Switch launches and everyone’s just yammering for Mass Effect, who knows.

“We never want to close doors like that.”

greatn posted:

Would this work better with the Turok franchise?

Rexroom posted:

In news that is not based on rumors, Bioware confirmed in an interview that they're not doing the Switch. As of yet, anyway.

TheScott2K posted:

Because, you know, it can't run Andromeda.

Brother Entropy posted:

the cool part about jurassic park was the early stuff where everyone actually reacts to 'holy poo poo we found out how to clone dinosaurs' with amazement and awe, it did a good job of humanizing the characters and helped put the adults on equal footing with the kids in what they were seeing and experiencing

jurassic world didn't have that stuff so it just came off like a mediocre action movie

Macaluso posted:

Whole lot of bad opinions about the awesome dinosaur movie ITT

greatn posted:

Would this work better with the Turok franchise?

RBA Starblade posted:

I like how the bad guy's plot is to sell dinosaurs to the military. War dogs are still a thing why would anyone give a poo poo about that.

s.i.r.e. posted:

Yeah, yours.

RBA Starblade posted:

I like how the bad guy's plot is to sell dinosaurs to the military. War dogs are still a thing why would anyone give a poo poo about that.

greatn posted:

Would this work better with the Turok franchise?