quote:

So I'm really good friends with a coworker, but yesterday he told me that he wants to sleep with me. He says he would never actually do it because "he loves his wife and kid" (they have a 1yo), but that he thinks of me sexually. He also knows that I'm engaged to "a great guy" (his words) and he doesn't want to get in the way of that.

I would be lying if I said I didn't find him attractive. But mostly in a 'yes he is good looking' way, like I'm attracted to Chris Pratt or Zac Efron or Emma Stone.

I love my fiancé. I like being friends with this coworker, but I would never get involved in someone else's marriage / family.

So I'm left with three questions 1. Am I a horrible person 2. Can I still be friends with this guy 3. Should I uninvite this guy and his wife from my wedding? I don't want his wife to be suspicious

TL;DR what the hell do I do

100 degrees Calcium posted:

100 degrees Calcium posted:

My married coworker [32M] says he wants to have sex with me [23F]

Ride The Gravitron posted:

poo poo I'm 28 and that be my answer

Nazzadan posted:

Me [F] 23 Him [M] 26 of 1 year I don't know what to do.
or
My[23F] vag is gigantic

quote:

I [26F] told my BF [24M] of 1 year about my cheating history. Did I kill the relationship?

I'll make this as short as I can. Let's call my bf Cal.

Cal is a good-hearted, driven, and caring man. He swept me off my feet and I've been infatuated ever since. I love this man. Except for a couple fights we've never had any issues.

About a month ago, he asked me about my brother, who was recently cheated on, and how he has been holding up. One thing led to another and we were on the topic of cheating.

Cal said he hopes he figures out what's best for him, and that he personally has no sympathy for cheaters. I told him I can understand how and why "it" could happen. He was surprised by that, and asked how come I feel that way.

My history came out. I cheated on my last two serious relationships. The relationships were in rough places, each lasting a little over 2 years. Someone came along and made me feel alive again. I enjoyed their desire and attention which I wasn't receiving from my relationship. Combined with drugs and alcohol, I cheated.

Cal was alarmed by this, said I just played the victim card and instead of addressing the issue found comfort in other men. I explained it so horribly to him, and I understand how he feels that way. He raised his voice and I could sense his frustration with me and my explanation. Cheating on him isn't something I imagine I would do. Of course I felt horrible. That was a part of my past. An ugly part. I'm not proud of it.

A few days later we went to a show together. He talked to me about his boundaries, and that he is sorry if he came off condescending. He wanted to carry on and I do too. At the show, I made a passing remark about one of the dancers. I said "I would definitely marry him". It was silly, but not meant to be serious.

I saw Cal's face twist, and he walked away. I got angry and yelled at him for taking offense to a stupid remark. He said sorry, his emotions flared and before he said something awful he wanted to walk away and cool off. He apologized again later and said he isn't the insecure type, but lately his gut has been screaming. That night was a total mood kill for me. It was just a silly joke and he walked off without saying a thing. This isn't something that has ever happened before.

Cal has never been the insecure type. I hang out with my friends, party without him, go to concerts, etc. We have established trust and he has never shown signs of insecurity. We openly talk about the insecurities we do have and at times he does over-communicate, which can be annoying, but it's with good intentions.

But ever since our talk I've sensed something different about him. He loves me but I can tell I've made a confident man worrisome. Our confident connection leaped right from my hands. My fun-loving, carefree guy now seems like he's 50ft up on a wall and looking down. He picks his words as if he's walking on eggshells. Things are just.. different. The most unfortunate part about all of this is another guy in my friend circle has grabbed my attention. I feel horrible but I feel like unwanted feelings are starting to develop.

Did this relationship die by my own hand? Is this salvageable? We communicate very well and have talked it over. But things still haven't been the same. It has been about a month now.

tl;dr: I told my BF about my cheating past and now he seems insecure and worrisome. Is it possible I killed our connection by exposing my checkered past?

kloa posted:

It's not like length = girth.

Bet she won't be happy until that dick hits her cervix on each stroke

54 40 or gently caress posted:

And then she will not be happy. Hoo boy, will she deserve that

Dial-a-Dog posted:

I'm imagining this girl awkwardly performing and failing at really basic magic tricks to an audience that's been instructed to just politely clap and agree that whatever card she pulls was their card no matter what and it's great. They should keep the ruse on until she's on her death bed and then let her know. In the meantime, they should tell her to get a real job though

Gluten Freeman posted:

"when relationships get too hard i immediately give up and look for the next person to gently caress. i told my bf this and now our relationship is too hard so i think im gonna gently caress my friend"

cock hero flux posted:

hotdog down a hallway

quote:

Husband (56M) allowed my son (18M) to throw some crazed drug fueled sex-party at our house while I was away. Not even sure what to do right now.

So my husband and I have had a strained relationship, especially in relation to our son, Eddie. My husband has ALWAYS been very 'loose' with Eddie, allowing him to stay out all night sometimes, letting him hang out with bad people, he very lightly chastised him when he found eddie with pot. Even when we were younger, my husband let him watch Old School when he was like 7 years old. He got him GTA and video games at a young age too. He has always been the cool dad. My husband has always encouraged him to be reckless and take risks and be outside all day. I remember when we first caught eddie drinking in the park at like 16, I wasn't FURIOUS but I was still like "what the hell" and my husband tried to play along but i could tell he was like, proud a tiny bit.

I have always been the overbearing mom to Eddie, or at least he views me that way, I tried and I tried to restrict him to some things but my husband always allowed me when I wasn't looking, and I just became a non authority to him at a certain point. My husband grew up in 1970s NYC and just had a VERY free childhood, like out on the streets doing cocaine and getting into fights in dive bars kind of growing up.

I distinctly remember when Eddie was 15, I didn't want him going over his friends house because the friends parents were crazy people, and then I caught my husband ALLOWING him to go after 11pm when I was asleep. Last year, when I was going away on a business trip, my son asked me if he could take a trip down to Philly for some college party and I said no, and I told my husband not to allow him... and instead my husband allowed him to go the second I left. He was 17 years old!

So basically, I had another business trip this time. I left for 2 days, said I was leaving for 3, but I ended up finishing early and I was suspect about stuff so I decided to not tell them I was coming home early.
I came home to an absolute disaster. My house wasn't 'wrecked' persay, nothing was broken, but there was maybe 100 beers laying around, the tables were dirty with ash and weed, there was a plate with some kind of powder drug on it, there was a half naked girl on the couch with an actual naked guy who was like 25 years old. I told them to get the gently caress out, i was fuming. I went upstairs and found my son in bed naked with a girl, and two people naked on the floor in his bedroom.

I woke him up and just started yelling, I told everyone to get the gently caress out of my house as soon as possible, I was so loving mad I thought my head was going to explode. Suddenly, 4 other people, half naked, ran out of MY BEDROOM, they looked about 28 years old. I went into my bedroom, found a plate of more powder drugs on the floor and cum on my bedsheet.
So of course, naturally I called my husband and I was just yelling and screaming, and he said he was staying over his friends house and that he LET MY SON HAVE A PARTY IN THE HOUSE and that it wasn't a big deal. I am just... fuming. This is beyond infuriating. I dont mind if my son has a few friends over, but he must have had 100, and the drugs and the sex that must have been going on here? I don't care if he has sex with a girl, but having all these naked people everywhere? I dont mind if he smokes pot occasionally, but coke (well idk if he did it, but the people here did).

I am just so loving mad. My son I am mad at especially, but my husband... how can he let this happen. He allowed my son to throw a party with no oversight, and it clearly got out of hand. I am honestly so loving impossibly mad at my husband, this is like a turning point in how 'loose' he treats our son. My son gets alright grades at his college, he drinks and parties a lot but i can let that slide, but cocaine and having what seems like a loving orgy at his parents house, with his fathers permission... i just cant do it. This is intolerable.

I argued with my son, he had basically nothing to say. I dont know what he would even say, but he was very sorry and he started cleaning everything as soon as possible. I'm obviously mad at him, but im glad he was cleaning before i even told him too, he is responsible and i think he would have cleaned everything before he thought i came home at least... but still, this is hosed up. Also who the hell are his friends? I always took my son as kind of a semi loser, but it seemed like these people were like models or at least in the popular crowd in nyc. A lot of these people seemed almost unnaturally attractive, most of my sons friends always seemed greasy and nerdy.

I am more mad at my husband, who has yet to come home and keeps reassuring me its not a big deal. What the hell do i do? My son is older now, but this is such a clear break of boundaries... it hurts that they dont listen to me for anything and that i am always painted as the crazy boundary mom. Maybe banning throwing crazy cocaine orgies in your parents makes me some kind of helicopter mom?? yeah, i dont think so.

tl;dr: Husband has always allowed my son to do whatever he wants with no boundaries, directly against my wishes. I left for a business trip, I come home and the house looks like there was some form of a cocaine orgy going on here, called my husband only to find out that he allowed it to happen.

Gluten Freeman posted:

"when relationships get too hard i immediately give up and look for the next person to gently caress. i told my bf this and now our relationship is too hard so i think im gonna gently caress my friend"

La Brea Carpet posted:

Here's the plot of an 80s teen movie from the perspective of the mother

Barudak posted:

I wonder if shell ever put two and two together or if she cheated on math in school when it got hard.

Khorne posted:

The couple sounds like an r/relationships post waiting to happen. Ignoring which parent I agree with, they both need to be on the same page. All she talks about is them being on different pages and neither one trying to talk the other into being on the same page. The dad does try to support her decisions so he doesn't seem like a jerk or anything, and he also seems to have boundaries for his son just not the same restrictive boundaries she does.

I highly doubt there were mountains of cocaine laying around downstairs and upstairs.

Andrast posted:

At least It sounds like the son had a great party

Subjunctive posted:

Done and waiting on cache or whatever.

Gluten Freeman posted:

The most unfortunate part about all of this is another guy in my friend circle has grabbed my attention. I feel horrible but I feel like unwanted feelings are starting to develop.

Cumslut1895 posted:

Cheater woman should talk to a therapist. she obviously doesn't like how her relationships work.

quote:

My [59] daughter [27F] invited her ex[26F] and her current GF (20) to our NY dinner and it was awfull
u/Awkwarddinner9013h
My other daughter adviced me to post here. Apologies if I did something wrong.

My oldest daughter Ana has been dating this girl, Lena, for almost 6 months now. To be honest, Ana has dated quite a few girls we had our doubts about, but Lena, despite being very young, is a very very nice girl. My husband and I like her a lot and she seems to love Ana. That's all that matters, right?

Now, before Lena and Ana started dating, Ana was living together with Alice. They dated on and off for 2 years till Alice cheated on my daughter with a guy, they got back together, and she cheated again. Ana was heartbroken, suicidal and went to therapy, honestly, I thought I lost her but 3 months later she met Lena.

From what I knew, Alice and Ana have been staying friends, which I find quite weird but anyway. Alice and Ana regularly meet up to have a drink and text a lot. Appearently Alice has been talking bad about Lena for no reason. I heard one of Ana's friends talking about it on the phone, Ana seemed to shrugg it off. Alice has also been making remarks about wanting to have sex with Ana, but appearantly my daughter doesn't take it serious.

However, Alice is originally from Belgium, we are French. Alice and her boyfriend had just broken up and she was alone durng the holidays. Ana wanted to host a NY dinner yesterday , since she lives at our place, we would be there, she would invite some friends and Lena. Or so we thought.

To our suprise, only Alice and Lena showed up. Things between Ana and Lena have been very tense in the past 2 weeks before it so I got scared. And honestly, I have no words for what happend.

During the dinner, Alice kept making jokes like 'I don't get why Ana and I even broke up, ahaha', she mocked Lena's age, told her she looked 'very young'. My daughter Ana didn't respond. I tried to steer the conversation towards something else, it worked, for 5 minutes.

It got ugly after that. Lena had a difficult childhood but I didn't know the details. I asked Lena how her parents celebrated christmas, but Alice intervened with' Aren't her parents dead?' Lena calmly said yes and Alice continued to say to Ana 'Well, at least with me you had in-laws hahahah'. My husband took Ana aside and asked her to make Alice leave or he would.

While my husband was talking to Ana, Alice kept being mean, I told her several times to stop. Lena stayed quite until a certain moment where she asked Alice 'Weren't you the one who cheated on Ana?' to which Alice replied with 'Well, at least I'm not the one who was abused during her childhood'.

At that point Lena threw her glass of soda at Alice and Alice ran away. Ana followed Alice.

My husband and I comforted Lena. But later when Ana had returned and we went to sleep, I heard them arguing. Ana was yelling how rude Lena had been and how she should be glad she was at the house otherwise she would be having sex with another girl she met at a bar. She was saying that she wanted to beat Lena and that she wished Lena would be a cheater cause then she 'would love her again', and that Alice was much prettier than her and how rude Lena was to have talked about the abuse (to Ana). I could hear Lena cry.

Lena cried all night in the kitchen, according to my husband. This morning Ana left to see Alice. Right now, she's at a bar with a girl she met on Tinder. Lena is still here. We have been trying to comfort her, but it's difficult, she doesn't want to speak bad about Ana, in a few minutes my husband will drop her off at her place.

My question is, what do I do with Ana? Right now, I want to send her to a mental health institute cause the way she acted is unheard off. And how do we handle Lena? The poor girl is broken.

tl;dr: My idiot daughter invited her ex to a dinner, the ex started to be very mean towards her current SO, and so did my daughter, how do we handle this?

quote:

Hi, thanks for sharing.

Have you ever heard of Polyamory?

If Ana doesn't like to be monogamous, she can at least learn to live ethically and safely.

Dial-a-Dog posted:

I wish this story was from the perspective of Ana or Alice because I'm dying to know how you rationalize doing any of that

quote:

Is right that my gf [37 F] is angry I [41M] bought new trousers without telling her?

My trousers are all old and tatty so during my lunch break at work I popped out and bought some new casual trousers in the sale. They're nothing special, just some black/blue jeans. I put them in the cupboard along with all my other trousers when I got home and wore the black jeans the next day. A couple days later she asked if my trousers were new. I replied yes and that I got them during my lunch break.

She was unhappy I didn't inform her of new trousers immediately. I pointed out that she has got new clothes before without informing me so I didn't see a problem. This made her really angry. She accuses me of "hiding them" and yet they are in plain sight, in the cupboard with all my other trousers and I wore a pair the next day in front of her, so I wouldn't exactly call it hiding them.

However, she has called our relationship into question saying there is something wrong with it if I have to hide them.

I really don't get why it has to be such a big deal. We rarely have time to go shopping together as we have a lot to do outside of work so it doesn't strike me as wrong to go and get some. I also find it hypocritical of her to make a big deal of this when she gets clothes on her own and I don't make any fuss about it, or care. It's normal to me.

Is it right she's angry? Is her behaviour reasonable? Should I have done things differently?

tl;dr: My trousers are old and tatty so I bought some new ones without telling my gf. She's angry I didn't tell her the day I got them and just wore them. Is it right she's angry?

54 40 or gently caress posted:

He put them in the cupboard ?