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Keru
Aug 2, 2004

'n suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us 'n the sky was full of what looked like 'uge bats, all swooping 'n screeching 'n divin' around the ute.

Aleph Null posted:

Is this real? What, did it take him a day to write it?
This guy. He's got his finger on the pulse of the American Dream.

In stores now!

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MS6FO50/

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ImpAtom
May 24, 2007


Chuck Tingle is the one shining spot of light in this dark and terrible world.

Bloody Hedgehog
Dec 12, 2003

💥💥🤯💥💥
Gotta nuke something

Aleph Null posted:

Is this real? What, did it take him a day to write it?

At this point I think Tingle just has a large collection of pre-written stories, and when he needs one he just loads it up in Word and Ctrl+H replaces the names.

Mogomra
Nov 5, 2005

simply having a wonderful time

Bloody Hedgehog posted:

At this point I think Tingle just has a large collection of pre-written stories, and when he needs one he just loads it up in Word and Ctrl+H replaces the names.

To be honest, that's pretty smart.

Kwyndig
Sep 23, 2006

Heeeeeey


Yeah, he's probably got a bunch of Trump scandal stories pre-written just waiting for the details, because you know there will be more scandals.

Bloody Hedgehog
Dec 12, 2003

💥💥🤯💥💥
Gotta nuke something
Tromp Conquered In The Butt By His Secret Love-Affair With Phil Clinton

dumb.
Apr 11, 2014

-=💀=-

Bloody Hedgehog posted:

At this point I think Tingle just has a large collection of pre-written stories, and when he needs one he just loads it up in Word and Ctrl+H replaces the names.

I dunno, the Look Inside samples from that one look pretty specifically written:

Chard
Aug 24, 2010




Tinglers are the reason I get out of bed each morning.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Aren't his books like 5 pages long or something? It's not too difficult to churn that out in an hour or so.

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.

ImpAtom posted:

Aren't his books like 5 pages long or something? It's not too difficult to churn that out in an hour or so.

It would take GRRM 8 months to get that much churned out.

New Leaf
Jul 24, 2013

Dragon Balls? Are they tasty?

Solice Kirsk posted:

It would take GRRM 8 months to get that much churned out.

But what if its football season? :ohdear:

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.

New Leaf posted:

But what if its football season? :ohdear:

24 months. Its a vicious cycle. #breakthewheel

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

"I've just arrived from the United States and I'm looking to do something hosed up" is one of the best sentences I've ever seen.

Rick_Hunter
Jan 5, 2004

My guys are still fighting the hard fight!
(weapons, shields and drones are still online!)

FactsAreUseless posted:

"I've just arrived from the United States and I'm looking to do something hosed up" is one of the best sentences I've ever seen.

Need to make this the new STDH thread title.

Stoatbringer
Sep 15, 2004

naw, you love it you little ho-bot :roboluv:

I get all my daily news updates from Tingle publications.

RoboRodent
Sep 19, 2012

I can't wait for Trump to insult Chuck Tingle on Twitter.

Railing Kill
Nov 14, 2008

You are the first crack in the sheer face of god. From you it will spread.

Kwyndig posted:

Yeah, he's probably got a bunch of Trump scandal stories pre-written just waiting for the details, because you know there will be more scandals.

Gotta pre-write that doomsday title now, for when Trump cleanses the Earth in nuclear fire.

DONALD TROMP rear end BLASTED BY SEXY RUSSIAN ATOMIC DINGLE
BY THE LATE CHUCK TINGLE (RIP)

Random Stranger
Nov 27, 2009



Railing Kill posted:

Gotta pre-write that doomsday title now, for when Trump cleanses the Earth in nuclear fire.

DONALD TROMP rear end BLASTED BY SEXY RUSSIAN ATOMIC DINGLE
BY THE LATE CHUCK TINGLE (RIP)

Uh, THE LATE HUGO NOMINATED CHUCK TINGLE (RIP). Please use his full title.

Railing Kill
Nov 14, 2008

You are the first crack in the sheer face of god. From you it will spread.

Random Stranger posted:

Uh, THE LATE HUGO NOMINATED CHUCK TINGLE (RIP). Please use his full title.

Damnit! I'm so sorry. Forgive me, Hugo Nominated Chuck Tingle, wherever you are!

Other gems we have to look forward to for the next 4* years:

DONALD TROMP "BANG-COCK" BUTT POUNDED BY SEVEN SEXY THAI BANKERS (WHO ARE SECRETLY CHINESE)

DUNALD TRAMP POUNDED IN THE BUTT BY SPECIAL SENATE INVESTIGATIVE COMMITTEE ON PRESIDENTIAL ETHICS AND FOREIGN RELATIONS

DERNLD TRIMP KILLS A HOOKER IN THE OVAL OFFICE AND SNORTS COKE OUT OF A GAY STRIPPER'S rear end CRACK

*(Assuming Trump doesn't get impeached in two years)

Android Apocalypse
Apr 28, 2009

The future is
AUTOMATED
and you are
OBSOLETE

Illegal Hen

Railing Kill posted:

Gotta pre-write that doomsday title now, for when Trump cleanses the Earth in nuclear fire.

DONALD TROMP rear end BLASTED BY SEXY RUSSIAN ATOMIC DINGLE
BY THE LATE CHUCK TINGLE (RIP)

Please. Trump isn't going to have Tingle killed.
He's not Hillary Clinton.

Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

by FactsAreUseless

Tenchi Muyo gets me wet posted:

Please. Trump isn't going to have Tingle killed.

Nah, he'd probably just pee on him.

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.

Wheat Loaf posted:

Nah, he'd probably just pee on him.

Pumped In The Rump By Pissedent Trump

dordreff
Jul 16, 2013

Wheat Loaf posted:

Nah, he'd probably just pee on him.

proving love is real for all who piss

Woebin
Feb 6, 2006

dordreff posted:

proving love is real for all who piss

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

RoboRodent posted:

I can't wait for Trump to insult Chuck Tingle on Twitter.

I think even Donald can puzzle out how that'll work for him

But he's yet to disappoint in dismal failure selling himself so

Say Nothing
Mar 5, 2013

by FactsAreUseless

oldpainless
Oct 30, 2009

This 📆 post brought to you by RAID💥: SHADOW LEGENDS👥.
RAID💥: SHADOW LEGENDS 👥 - It's for your phone📲TM™ #ad📢

Are all those Chuck tingle books real?

Subjunctive
Sep 12, 2006

✨sparkle and shine✨

oldpainless posted:

Are all those Chuck tingle books real?

Yes, oldpoundless, but they're each very short.

I brought my Drake
Jul 10, 2014

These high-G injections have some serious side effects after pulling so many jumps.

Tingle's grammar is spot on. :allears:

Rysithusiku
Nov 10, 2013

Witness the assless man and despair!
All futures point to a world of filled holes.
To quote some wise goon, "Chuck Tingle is the greatest writer in American history that I will never read."

Pigsfeet on Rye
Oct 22, 2008

I'm meat on the hoof



Aleph Null posted:

Is this real? What, did it take him a day to write it?
This guy. He's got his finger stuck right up the butt of the American Dream.


FTFY

RareAcumen
Dec 28, 2012





Jamesman
Nov 19, 2004

"First off, let me start by saying curly light blond hair does not suit Hyomin at all. Furthermore,"
Fun Shoe

Literally didn't even know this movie was even made, let alone out yet. Great marketing.

PittTheElder
Feb 13, 2012

:geno: Yes, it's like a lava lamp.

I saw previews for it in theatre, and man did it ever look terrible.

The Bloop
Jul 5, 2004

by Fluffdaddy

PittTheElder posted:

I saw previews for it in theatre, and man did it ever look terrible.

It pretty much was.

Admittedly, I don't really care about the games, but a friend of mine really wanted to see it and is a pissbaby about going to the movies alone so I went with him.

Bunni-kat
May 25, 2010

Service Desk B-b-bunny...
How can-ca-caaaaan I
help-p-p-p you?

Phimosissy posted:

It pretty much was.

Admittedly, I don't really care about the games, but a friend of mine really wanted to see it and is a pissbaby about going to the movies alone so I went with him.

poo poo. I've got a friend who loves Asscred, and he wants to see the movie, but also hates going alone. Maybe I can get drunk first.

Woodburger
Dec 5, 2004

...Like a thousand other commanders on a thousand other battlefields, I wait for the dawn.

Avenging_Mikon posted:

poo poo. I've got a friend who loves Asscred, and he wants to see the movie, but also hates going alone. Maybe I can get drunk first.

Get drunk during and start an MST3K style riff fest

The MSJ
May 17, 2010

Jamesman posted:

Literally didn't even know this movie was even made, let alone out yet. Great marketing.

It also came out a week after Rogue One.

Coq au Nandos
Nov 7, 2006

I think I would say to my daughters if they were to ask me this question... A shitpost is the greatest gift that you can give someone, the ultimate gift of giving and don't give it to someone lightly, that's what I would say.

Phimosissy posted:

It pretty much was.

Admittedly, I don't really care about the games, but a friend of mine really wanted to see it and is a pissbaby about going to the movies alone so I went with him.

You're friends with Donald Trump?

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Vietnamwees
May 8, 2008

by Fluffdaddy

Coq au Nandos posted:

You're friends with Donald Trump?

This guy.



This guy gets it.

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