/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Zzulu posted:

i respekt her chocies

I would put my dick near that bear trap, but my penis would probably wisely wilt away at the last moment.

I know a fair deal of people with tats but they pick an artist or two and work out good pieces months in advance and save up for their poo poo and don't get terrible tattoos. I think tats and piercings are visually interesting and I always enjoy checking out someone's ink, especially if it's a piece that has personal meaning.

I have one small, boring, single color, simple geometric shape tattoo that I got as a personal reminder to not kill myself and to keep carrying on when poo poo looks hopeless. It is a green play button like on an electronic device, in this case a square with rounded edges and a right-facing isosceles triangle of negative space in the middle. It means "go play."

Will I ever get another tattoo? Not likely. I might eventually get the one I have recolored and maybe spruced up a bit with shading or something.

Uh, I've never played Overwatch and I'm reasonably sure that I haven't tasted cum. Probably. I can't ever be entirely sure of anything due to large drunken memory gaps.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 00:19

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# ? May 14, 2024 00:47

tsa: Feb 3, 2014

chitoryu12 posted:

Is that really overweight? I know someone who's 200 at her height and doesn't look bad at all. Or does she keep it all in her gut?

Ahahahahahahahahahhahhahahhahhahahhahah

# ? Jan 14, 2017 00:25

Nazzadan: Jun 22, 2016

Me [19 M] with my girlfriend [23 F] of almost 2 years just dropped the Abstinence bomb.

quote:

Hey guys,
I've hit a bit of a crossroad in my relationship.
A bit of backstory: amazing, fun, loving relationship. Sex is (now was) great, dates were great etc. I think we make a wonderful couple.
A few nights ago, with no prior warning, she now wants no sex til marriage (abstinence). She said that over the last few months, she has regretted sex even though she really enjoys it. She says she feels guilty, and that she has sinned, and wants to stop. I am not overly-religious, but she is, so I do not 100% understand the religious reasoning behind it all. She still wants to do other things like oral etc, but no PIV sex. I myself have a very high sex drive (being a young male) and see myself being quite effected by this. If not now, then maybe in the near future. Who knows.
I am not sure what to do. A part of me wants to stick it out because we get along so well, and every other part of the relationship is perfect, but the other part of me wants to move on and find someone I am more 'compatible' with.
I realise that every relationship is different and has its pros/cons, but I would love to hear stories from you guys who have been in a similar situation. What did you choose? Do you regret it?
tl;dr: GF dropped the A-Bomb mid relationship, struggling to know what to do.

She is either
A) trying to get him to propose
or
B) is now a born again Christian but missed the part where you aren't supposed to have ANY kind of sex

# ? Jan 14, 2017 00:30

tsa: Feb 3, 2014

54 40 or gently caress posted:

Depends on their fitness level honestly. You could be morbidly obese BMI wise but they could be totally jacked and just really muscular

No, you really can't, not 5'3 /200.

Particularly for women, bmi is basically always accurate outside of a handful of bodybuilders worldwide.

tsa fucked around with this message at 00:33 on Jan 14, 2017

# ? Jan 14, 2017 00:31

Nazzadan: Jun 22, 2016

I just googled 5'3 200lbs and got very sad

# ? Jan 14, 2017 00:35

Fat Shat Sings: Jan 24, 2016

maybe tattoos don't matter so much because we are all going to be rotted piles of mush 100 years from now and it doesn't matter if you make your skin a collage of neon colored dildos if that's what you feel like doing with your skin before it becomes a rotted pile of mush

hope this helps

# ? Jan 14, 2017 00:41

Nazzadan: Jun 22, 2016

Wow that was really deep

# ? Jan 14, 2017 00:45

Fat Shat Sings: Jan 24, 2016

your mother [??F] is really deep

# ? Jan 14, 2017 00:46

Nazzadan: Jun 22, 2016

Please don't assume my mother's gender.

Content:
My (f/24) BF (M/30) is trying to lose weight; I hate seeing him suffer, he hates it, but he keeps going on. 3.5 years

quote:

We've been together for 3 and a half years. He has always been heavy set. He has never tried to lose weight before. Suddenly 1 month ago he sat me down and said he wants to lose weight. I said I would support him of course and we talked about the life-style changes we can make together. Over the last month we did them together.
He has lost a grand total of one pound, not including water weight. I think partly cuz he isn't that overweight but also cuz he is older. He is trying so hard and he hates it so much. I can see it on his face. I don't even understand why he is doing this to himself. Why now? I ask him and he says he just wants to be healthy but he is pretty healthy: Normal stats from the doctor, no diseases, never gets sick.
I'm trying to be supportive. Thats what partners do. I feel like I want to give him an out though. I want to make him understand that I dont care and that I just want him to be happy and comfortable. He should understand this but that is the only reasons he could be doing this. It has to be due to physical attractiveness or something. I'm naturally skinny.
Other parts of his life are suffering. I think his job performance is suffering. He is tired more. I give more bjs instead of PIV. He used to pin me to the bed and have his way with me nightly but now we just have that slow sex or he tells me to give him a bj. I love cooking for him but it's not fun anymore. I can't cook him things that he loves or that taste good.
I feel trapped between a rock and a hard place. I want to support him. But I also want to really understand why he is doing this. I want to make sure he is doing it for the right reasons. I want to make him understand that he doesn't need to do this if he feels that way. Its just such a tough subject. I don't want to sound unsupportive.
tl;dr: bf is trying to lose weight. being a good gf and supporting him but he hates it is suffering in a lot of ways. I don't know how to communicate to him that it's okay for him to give up if he wants, but still be supportive.
EDIT: Guys, I'm not asking for diet advice ok?

I like that the comments are trying to help the idiot boyfriend lose more than 1 pound

# ? Jan 14, 2017 00:50

54 40 or fuck: Jan 4, 2012; No Yanda's allowed

He should go vegan, that fat will melt right off

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:00

Nazzadan: Jun 22, 2016

I [23M] am really into the thought of my GF [23F] dressing up for me during sex.

quote:

I'm really into the idea of my girlfriend dressing up as Velma (Yes, Velma) and I'm quite worried about being open about it to her.
I want to be able to be open and tell her, but first off it's quite an embarrassing thing to admit to unless she's open minded and adventurous, but she isn't really. I said I thought the idea of her wearing boots for me was quite sexy, but she said it was too weird for her and she's 'not going to wear them' during sex. She's simply not into anything adventurous, just plain PIV sex.
I understand that if something is too strange for her to enjoy that she shouldn't have to do it for me. The repercussion though is that I don't feel I can be open about the things I enjoy for fear of her thinking it's too weird.
I think it comes down to me being more open to experimentation than she is. It leads me to feel I can't communicate my desires towards her. I'm absolutely sure the Velma thing would be far too odd for her.
I guess my question is, how can I warm her to the idea of trying some new things, and make her less weirded out by these things I'd like to try?
tl;dr: Want to be able to be more open about what I want to try in bed, but GF is only into plain PIV with no kinks involved. Is there a way I can warm her to ideas? I don't feel it's as easy as being straight up about it.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:05

Mirthless: Mar 27, 2011; by the sex ghost

Nazzadan posted:

I [23M] am really into the thought of my GF [23F] dressing up for me during sex.

How boring is this chick if this guy thinks an orange sweater and glasses is too kinky for her?

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:10

Nazzadan: Jun 22, 2016

I now want my gf to dress in an orange sweater and thick glasses.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:13

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Nazzadan posted:

I [23M] am really into the thought of my GF [23F] dressing up for me during sex.

Just show up dressed as Snidely Whiplash and tell her to put on the goddamn sweater, you square.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:15

Zelder: Jan 4, 2012

Nazzadan posted:

I now want my gf to dress in an orange sweater and thick glasses.

same but also she's erotically feeding me scooby snacks

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:15

Nazzadan: Jun 22, 2016

Okay, this is quite the saga.
My [M34] Girlfriend [F26] of 6 years cheated on me in her parents house after a drunk night out.

quote:

This is a long story, but I just need to get it all out.
I've been dating my girlfriend for around 6 years. 2 weekends ago (Nov 29th), she cheated on me with a guy she had slept with before we meet. We have been having a few issues lately, but nothing out of the normal. We would fight about little things but nothing too crazy. I do have a temper and have said some really mean things to her. She had gained a lot of weight and I started to find her less and less attractive, but I Still loved her for who she is. We have a lot of things together, 2 cats, a whole apartment full of belongings, etc. We both have great jobs and make decent money. She is getting her master�s degree. However, we never see each other. I work 8am-5pm job, she works 1pm-10pm. We see each other 2 hours a day on average, she gets home at 10, we go to bed at 11, rinse/repeat. Our love life is okay. We have some kinky things we like to do and its fun. She has Fridays off, and I like to relax, unwind and have a drink at home on Fridays. She�s the type that needs all her friends and wants to go out to the bars. We're 7.5 years apart and I understand the bar life is fun, but I'm 34 and kind of over the bar scene. She usually goes out with her friends on Fridays and/or Saturdays. Her friends are mostly single, one of which takes medication for schizophrenia, bi-polar and is having an affair with a married man. She is a toxic friend that feeds her with bad advice.
Back in June, I had a slip up with a girl that I meet through a friend. She would come over on Fridays, we would drink and get a little too close. My girlfriend saw it and we broke up for about a month. It killed me. She moved out but eventually we get back together. Things go back to where they were and we never really worked hard on fixing anything.
So what happened was Saturday, Nov. 28th, she goes out to the local trendy bar where a band from Portland, Or. was playing. The drummer of this band is a guy she had a little fling with before I meet her and is actually an old high school friend of mine.
She leaves at 6pm to have dinner, and I don't hear from her until 1am. I say I'm sorry for our fight earlier that day, and that I will pay her tab, she says "I'm still mad at you". I text her about 6 more times over the course of a few hours asking if she�s okay, and I hear nothing from her. I FB her best friend she was with at 4:30am and she says she went over to her friend Emily�s house. I think, "Well, okay, she got passed out drunk" So I go to bed. I had been drinking that night as well and was pretty lit up. I was tired.
I'm awaken at 6am from her coming into our bedroom, she�s clearly super drunk and is putting on her night time clothes and then goes out in our living room and passes out in her chair. I instantly know something is wrong. I get up and she comes into bed and I end up sleeping in my chair because I had this weird feeling and was pissed she came home at 6am. She ends up puking in the bathroom sink and I'm awakened at 8am with her cell phone alarm going off and she is too passed out to even hear it or silence it. I go in our bedroom and turn it off, then I grab her phone and remove the battery because I want to look at her texts/fb messages later.
She wakes up around noon, and I wake up a little after and I ask her if she cheated on me. Without any sort of hesitation she says "Yes, I did!". I ask �with who?� and she says the drummer in the band. I nearly black out in sickness. I instantly start packing her poo poo up, etc. She has to be at work at 1pm. She is still drunk and hungover but not showing any sign of remorse or regret at this time.

So I start going through her Facebook messages and the drummer guy asked if he got her in hot water with her parents. OMG, she hosed him at her parents house. The thing is, her parents house is attached to our apartment (it�s like one huge house and the back is sectioned off as a standalone apartment). We are in the back area, and her parents are in the front. Apparently, she brought him home around 5 or 530am (its what ive been guessing, could have been eariler), they hosed, and her dad sees them leaving. She walks back over to our apartment naked with only her jacket on. I have video surveillance and I see she has no clothes on and is carrying her shoes, purse and cellphone. She left her skirt, bra, underwear, leggings and blouse over in her old bed room where they hosed. I'm just loving mortified. I go over and talk with her parents about everything, and they already knew (they know b/c she told them and her mom had to give her a ride back to the bar to pick up her car). I�m bawling. They hug me and we talk for about an hour.
Around 4:30pm she comes home (she went home sick from work) and one of her �good� friends is waiting for her in the car (I say good, because my GF has several different sets of friends, the drinking buddies, and the decent high school friends), and by this time I had calmed down and kind of accepted it. We are over. This is going to be hard, but I cannot forgive her. I help her pack her clothes and such out and she asks me if I still love her and if I ever want to see her again. I said "No, I hate you, you betrayed me on the lowest level. I never want to see you again." She starts crying. The reality of the situation kicks in and she is in instant regret. She goes out side where she cries for at least 5 minutes to her friend. They leave.
I block her on FB and GMail chat. I still have her phone, and she has no idea she even had it with her when she came home at 6am. She thought she lost it at the after party. She is Facebooking a few of her friends on how she hosed up, how she feels ashamed she did this, but it had to be done and it was her way out of our relationship. But then she says "we've had sex, but he's never hosed me". That killed me, still does. She lied to the guy and said she was single. I FB him and he sincerely apologizes and said he would never intentionally do that to anyone. I don�t blame him, except for taking advantage of a crazy super drunk girl. I'm just sick. I self-medicate and by around 7pm I unblock her and she instantly starts talking to me. She�s in hysterics and is begging for my forgiveness. We talk and talk.
So the next morning (Monday), I call in sick to work, we FB and she comes over and we snuggle. I am numb. She is bawling. I am bawling. Apologizing, begging me, doesn�t want me to leave her, doesn�t want us to break up, and wants to work on us. Tying everything to get some sort of forgiveness from me. I cave. I love this girl. We hang out all day, we talk about what happened. I ask way too many questions and know too much. But for the next week we are more snuggly and intimate than ever before.
For the past week and a half we have been back living together, and obviously things are weird and awkward. But I feel more close to her than I ever did before, but I am loving sickened still. I go from kind of forgetting about it to remembering it and getting upset. I cannot get this mental image out of my head. I had her go get a STD check the day after and it came back negative.
Last night we went to a couple�s counseling/thearpy and it was good. We identified some of our issues (like never seeing each other, drinking too much, etc.) I felt better but I still cannot get this gut wrenching feeling to go away.
I'm not sure if I can move past this, granted it hasn�t even been a 2 week. Anything I can do or work on to get over this? I�m worried I won�t ever get over this and it will be brought up in future fights and eventually it will end our relationship. Your thoughts and any advice are greatly appreciated!
Thank you for listening to my story.
EDIT: Spelling, couple minor details.
tl;dr: GF of 6 years brings old fling to her parents house after a long night of drinking. We make up but cannot get over it. Need help.

Update less than a month later

Me [34 M] with my GF [26 F] 6 years together. We both cheated. I'm lost in total dismal and despair. Infidelity

quote:

Backstory: Back in late November, my GF of ~6 years cheated on me with a guy she had slept with before we met. It was a crazy 5am drunk/drug fueled night after we had gotten in a fight the evening before. She hadn�t seen him in years and told him she was single. Earlier in the year (spring time), I had a 3 month affair with a close friends daughter (he's a lot older than me), totally under the radar. We never had sex (she wanted too), but we did everything else. It mostly happen in my house, sometimes even when my GF was there. I was always drinking. We both hosed up. I feel ashamed.
My GF never knew about the affair but had suspicions (it stopped because she caught both of us kissing), we broke up for a few weeks, but got back together. For about a month we were really working hard, but our relationship went back to being sour. She was going out to the bar a lot more and her single best friend moved back in town. After she had her one-night-stand I admitted to it all. Although I haven't told her everything (mostly just details of where things happened at), I feel like utter poo poo because of it.
We have a really great marriage/relationship/couples counseling with a wonderful therapist. She gets both of us. It has REALLY helped a lot. My GF and I are 100% on making our relationship work. She has begged for my forgiveness, and wants to get married, etc. We have both said that there�s no reason into making this work if we don�t plan on marriage. I feel the same. We both admit that our relationship had gone for the worse and we are doing so much more together and really making a lot of progress. And the weird part is, we are more close than we EVER have been. We still haven't had sex, because she is waiting to hear back from the Health Department (she did 2 STD checks), and I don't feel mentally ready for it yet. We both have stopped drinking and going out to bars, and are completely devoted to each other. It�s been honestly, amazing.
My problem is, even though I had a horrible and regretful 3 month affair, I still CANNOT for the life of me stop thinking about what she did. For a while, I can totally forget about it, feel so in love with her, then my brain kicks me in the rear end and says "Hey, remember that thing she did!�. I instantly get into my head (which she can tell), and I get internally upset and angry at her. I'm being a selfish hypocrite because I cheated even worse, where my cheating was physical AND mental and lasted for months. I had serious thoughts of ending my relationship over my cheating to be with this other girl. My GF has moved on, she doesn't ask me questions about my affair (she has, but it�s very rarely), whereas I'm constantly thinking about what she did. It's not fair to her.
Another thing that has been bothering me, is that she told me that she was so highly drunk that (and I quote) "I was drunk and pressured and only a little conscious". And "I wasn't able to make rational decisions. So in my mind it probably wasn't consensual." She told me this a little over a month after it happened. I asked her why she didn't tell me sooner and she responds with: "I didn't ever talk to you about this because I didn't know how to approach it without seeming blamey or something." So this was brought up at the last therapist session, and our therapist was the counties leading person in these drug type cases (she had thousands of cases), and everything my GF described of what she remembered from that night were point-to-point description with someone possibly drugging her. The counselor believes she was given a drug. The cheating was so out of character for her. But on the other hand, her best friend, who was at the after-party with her, doesn't think that anyone there would have done something like that, and I truly believe that she was just so drunk, and it was so late in the morning (the sex cheating happened after 5am, but they were kissing at the party) that she just mentally felt more drugged. She says she only remembers bits and pieces (like flashes of light and still shots) of the actual sex and even admitted to a friend on Facebook that it was not good. She said that she only remembers drinking one beer, and then (she doesn�t remember) having a sandwich there at the party. 3 hours with only 1 beer and eating usually would sober someone up.
I guess I just need to get this off my chest, and maybe ask for some advice on things I can do to get over it. I truly love her and want to spend the rest of my life together, but having this been so recent, I'm struggling to get over it. I was hoping after a month in a half I would have progressed further than I have.
Thank you.
tl;dr: Need help moving on and getting over our infidelity. We want to get married and I need some peace.

And the final update
I [M34] haven't had sex with GF [F27] in 5 years. + other issues

quote:

I hope this is posted in the right sub. If not, please let me know and I can move it.
Throwaway. I'm 34 she's 27. Long story short, the GF and I haven't had the most amazing relationship. We fight sometimes, over money, friends, the usual stuff. She spends a lot on clothes and I'm left to cover other expenses while she 'pays me back", which i usually never see the return.
We have not had PIV sex for 5 years (since early 2011). We have mutually masturbated each other and oral many times. So it's not a exactly a "dead bedroom" but its quickly becoming that now. She gained A LOT of weight in the first year of our relationship (she was 330 lbs. at her heaviest last year) and it really was a turn off for me, and we would try, and I couldn't keep my erection. She lost about 80 pounds last year and started to look much better. Then a year ago (March-May 2015), I had a 3 month affair with another woman, and then 6 months (November 30 2015) later, she had a one night stand with an old fling of hers after being incredibly drunk at a party. This has been a HUGE ordeal. We decided to try reconciliation, to try and make things work. We have done relationship counseling, bought gifts, went on small trips, etc. We spend more time together now that we ever have. We solved a lot of issues that plagued our relationship in the past.
It's been 6 months post her One-night-stand, and it's even more difficult to think about having sex with her. Our 'sexy times' are pretty much non existent now. We fight all the time, sometimes daily. We go on shopping sprees to make us feel better, or go out to dinner way to often. She has started to gain her weight back. I feel like I'm on a runaway train that going to crash and burn soon.
I want to be with her, we talk about marriage, kids, house, etc. Our feelings for each other are so toxic sometimes. I don't even know how to have sex again with her, every time I think about it, I get upset and I cannot get an erection with her anymore. I'm in a need of some serious advice.
TL;DR: Haven't had sex in 5 years with GF, infidelity issues, trying to see if it will work. Any advice.

I wanted to add some of his comments from the original thread because they were really funny and downvoted to oblivion, but I didn't want this to be any longer and I'm a bit lazy

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:20

Cumslut1895: Feb 18, 2015; by FactsAreUseless

Nazzadan posted:

I now want my gf to dress in an orange sweater and thick glasses.

I think you mean a blue sweater and thick glasses

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:22

54 40 or fuck: Jan 4, 2012; No Yanda's allowed

Mirthless posted:

How boring is this chick if this guy thinks an orange sweater and glasses is too kinky for her?

Forget the seater and glasses, she won't even wear boots.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:23

remigious: May 13, 2009; Destruction comes inevitably; Hell Gem

My tattoos make me feel like I have a sense of control over my body, and that is valuable to me. And touch ups are definitely a thing that helps.
I don't really care if other people don't like them.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:37

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

That entire long saga leaves me wondering why they are in a relationship anyway

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:39

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

inertia and the dull realization that any relationship they are one half of will always be a miserably dysfunctional one

they're gonna wind up getting married and playing the entirety of Tallahassee for their wedding music

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:42

remigious: May 13, 2009; Destruction comes inevitably; Hell Gem

I wish that breaking up was more socially acceptable in our culture. So many people's lives would be vastly improved. Breaking up should be celebrated, not stigmatized! I mean, it's sad of course, but ultimately for the best.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:47

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

remigious posted:

I wish that breaking up was more socially acceptable in our culture. So many people's lives would be vastly improved. Breaking up should be celebrated, not stigmatized! I mean, it's sad of course, but ultimately for the best.

There's a Star Trek episode where a couple go to a vacation planet and perform a little ceremony to break up, then they are free to meet people on vacation.

Real life should be like that.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:48

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Yeah, it's completely Alpha Couple. I'm going to hazard a guess there's also a certain degree of "we have to work hard for our love, and whoever initiates a breakup is the quitter and bad one, and I absolutely positively must not be the bad one!!" thinking going on, because that's basically guaranteed for gangrenous relationships on that level.

At least the dude recognizes that he's a hypocritical poo poo about the cheating thing. I would rather not be cheated on, obviously, but if I had to be, I'd way rather get cheated on with a single drunken hookup than a three-month thing with emotional involvement and poo poo.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 01:48

Barudak: May 7, 2007

WampaLord posted:

There's a Star Trek episode where a couple go to a vacation planet and perform a little ceremony to break up, then they are free to meet people on vacation.

Real life should be like that.

Isn't this typically called going to college in another state?

# ? Jan 14, 2017 02:02

P-Mack: Nov 10, 2007

Antivehicular posted:

I'd way rather get cheated on with a single drunken hookup than a three-month thing with emotional involvement and poo poo.

I'd rather it be getting spit roasted by Jersey Shore guidos. Just too over the top for me to get mad about.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 02:08

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

P-Mack posted:

I'd rather it be getting spit roasted by Jersey Shore guidos. Just too over the top for me to get mad about.

"Look, you were out of town for the week and it was the craziest goddamn Craigslist ad, I had to see if it was even real..."

# ? Jan 14, 2017 02:11

tater_salad: Sep 15, 2007

Bonzo posted:

Me (22M) with my GF (22F) of 2 years, she wants more piercings and tattoos, I'm not too crazy about them but she wants my support...I can't do it

loving nailed the she's on this
"Oh Jesus these folks better be like 22"

# ? Jan 14, 2017 02:11

Grem: Mar 29, 2004; It's how her species communicates

Nazzadan posted:

Okay, this is quite the saga.
My [M34] Girlfriend [F26] of 6 years cheated on me in her parents house after a drunk night out.

Update less than a month later

Me [34 M] with my GF [26 F] 6 years together. We both cheated. I'm lost in total dismal and despair. Infidelity

And the final update
I [M34] haven't had sex with GF [F27] in 5 years. + other issues

I wanted to add some of his comments from the original thread because they were really funny and downvoted to oblivion, but I didn't want this to be any longer and I'm a bit lazy

Wait what? While all this cheating was going on they weren't doing the ol' pee eye vee?

# ? Jan 14, 2017 02:12

Fat Shat Sings: Jan 24, 2016

Antivehicular posted:

Yeah, it's completely Alpha Couple. I'm going to hazard a guess there's also a certain degree of "we have to work hard for our love, and whoever initiates a breakup is the quitter and bad one, and I absolutely positively must not be the bad one!!" thinking going on, because that's basically guaranteed for gangrenous relationships on that level.

At least the dude recognizes that he's a hypocritical poo poo about the cheating thing. I would rather not be cheated on, obviously, but if I had to be, I'd way rather get cheated on with a single drunken hookup than a three-month thing with emotional involvement and poo poo.

People think that love is supposed to endure anything if its real so therefore a terrible relationship should be forever because true love conquers all. They don't understand the misery and constant doubt means they subconsciously know they aren't actually in love with that person and instead are in love with the idea of being in love.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 02:20

100 degrees Calcium: Jan 23, 2011

It doesn't help that breakups, even necessary ones, are painful experiences by their own right. People can weather it, but it's not surprising that they would avoid it.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 02:29

Play: Apr 25, 2006; Strong stroll for a mangy stray

Something a bit different, from a new story. Sorry about the crappy formatting, wasn't me

quote:

A middle school teacher who pleaded guilty to having a long-term sexual relationship with a 13-year-old boy was sentenced Friday to 10 years in prison.

Alexandria Vera, 24, a former Aldine ISD teacher, admitted to the relationship last year in exchange for a sentence decided by the judge with cap of 30 years in prison.

State District Judge Michael McSpadden said he does not believe Vera is a danger to other children, specifically not a classic pedophile, but that he needed to send a message to the community.

"We want our educators to teach our students," he said in court. "We want them to keep their hands off the students."

The former teacher was facing the possibility of life in prison after pleading guilty to aggravated sexual assault of a child.

The sentencing was complicated because the boy's family knew about the relationship and approved, the judge said. He said letters from the boy and his mother sought to put some of the responsibility on the eighth grade boy. The victim's mother worried that Vera might lose her job, the judge said.

In court, prosecutors outlined a string of deceptions from Vera, including moving the child and his father into her home and pretending to the outside world to date the father.

Prosecutor Denise Nichols said Vera had a pattern of manipulation to "groom" the child and his family so she could continue the illicit behavior.

"She has a history of straight-out deception," Nichols said.

Vera also paid cell phone bills, bought groceries for the family and attended holiday events with them as the boy's girlfriend.

Prosecutors hammered Vera for inappropriate behavior beginning in the classroom and extending to other students. She apparently let two eighth graders have sex at her home, prosecutors said in court.

The prosecutor also said Vera's 6-year-old daughter knew about the illicit relationship and for some time called the 13-year-old "dad."

While her possible punishment was capped at 30 years, she was eligible for probation, which her lawyer argued was appropriate.

Defense attorney Ricardo Rodriguez called only one witness Friday, a therapist who profiled Vera to outline her mental state.

"I think she was driven by being in love with him," said Karen Lawson, a mental health professional who works with sex offenders, including sex addicts.

Lawson said Vera's history of seeing domestic violence situations as she was growing up, coupled with a deep need for love, led her to a relationship with the young man who flattered and seemed to adore her.

"She's someone who has a big heart," Lawson said.

Vera has been free on $100,000 bail, but has had to wear a GPS ankle monitor, stay away from schools and have no contact with the teen who allegedly impregnated her. She later had an abortion, according to court records.

Vera had faced a punishment range of 25 years to life in prison if convicted of continuous sexual assault of a child, a felony with a heightened punishment, even for first offenders.

McSpadden read a pre-sentence investigation prepared by court officials and several letters from supporters, including the victim's mother.

Vera was arrested after officials with Child Protective Services were notified about a possible sexual relationship and found out during their investigation that Vera had gotten pregnant and had an abortion.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 03:01

54 40 or fuck: Jan 4, 2012; No Yanda's allowed

The absolute worst loving thing about those female rapist teachers is the amount of "where was she when I was 13" comments.
:siren:

SHES A RAPIST :siren:

The fact they even refer to it as a relationship is gross. She is a predator and should be ostracized

# ? Jan 14, 2017 03:04

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

Wow, that is hosed up on many levels.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 03:17

100 degrees Calcium: Jan 23, 2011

It's weird that they're like "eh, she's not a pedophile pedophile" before going on to recount what has got to be the most elaborate scheme a pedophile has ever engaged in to gently caress a child, including effectively indebting the child's parents?

Actually yeah, what the gently caress about those parents!? Obviously the teacher is the direct issue here, but are you going to tell me that the parents would allow and enable that poo poo and then just get away with it? That kid has been so poorly served by all the adults in his life, he's gonna grow up more hosed up than your average goon.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 03:34

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Christ, the family condoning it and trying to put the blame on the kid. Was this a poverty situation where the bribery was really enough to sway them, or are these people basically accomplices? Or both?

# ? Jan 14, 2017 03:38

La Brea Carpet: Nov 22, 2007; I have no mouth and I must post

Continuing tattoo chat

quote:

My (21f) sister (29f) doesn't want me to get anymore tattoos because of her wedding photos.Non-Romantic

My sister Taylor got engaged recently, and their wedding date is set to be in early September. She asked me to be a bridesmaid which I am obviously more than thrilled to do. I've had tattoos since I was 18 and although they are not Taylor's taste at all she's never said anything negative to me about them. Nothing aside from the usual, "that's big, how much," etc. She has two small tattoos: a flower on her foot and "trio" on her wrist (friend tattoo).

I have five tattoos right now: a traditional wolf piece on my left bicep that covers a good portion of my arm, and a small outlined rose with a 13 in middle (Friday the 13th) on my right forearm. In November I got my second bigger piece on my inner left arm, a traditional hummingbird, and over Christmas I got an elephant tattoo on my ribs. Today, per Friday the 13th tradition, my friend and I went to get tattoos. I chose a dagger dripping blood that says "13" on my shin. It's small and cute and I think it's badass.

Taylor commented a scared emoji face on the picture of the tattoo I put on Instagram, and texted me asking if I was getting anymore on my arms. She told me she liked my new one but I feel like she was just trying to play it off. Then she asked exactly what I had on my arms/where for the wedding pictures, and mentioned that her friend is freaking out because she has a half sleeve. She doesn't think it's a big deal but would like to hide them for some photos using "strategic manevuers."

I don't want to say I'm insulted because I'm totally not... I get that she isn't someone who's into big colorful tattoos, and maybe she doesn't want that showcased at her wedding or in the photos. But it also hurts a bit because they are a part of me.. aside from the Friday the 13th tattoos she knows my other 3 are family based, and the ones on my left arm are truly beautiful tattoos. I told her I would face different ways for her photos and hold off on getting anymore arm tattoos until after the wedding. I planned on getting more this year and I almost don't like feeling like I have to wait, or ask her permission to get them in another spot

I guess what I'm asking is, should I just honor her wishes and not get anymore on my arms until after September? Would it be out of line to get them in other places that I want even though they may show in her pictures too? I don't want to ruin her vision for her wedding day at all, but getting tattooed is something I enjoy/planned on doing this year. Am I wrong for being a little put off?

TL;DR Sister doesn't want me to get anymore arm tattoos for her wedding photos/wants to hide them. Not sure if I'm justified in feeling conflicted.

Wanna see that "traditional" wolf tattoo.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 03:39

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Are Friday the 13th tattoos a thing?

Normally I'm really skeptical of any brides who get really anal-retentive about how people look for wedding photos, but in this case I'm kind of leaning towards the sister. Those tats sound ghastly.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 03:42

100 degrees Calcium: Jan 23, 2011

God, that teacher story. My faith in humanity hasn't dipped this low since the one about the guy who raped his girlfriend when she cooked something he himself would not eat.

# ? Jan 14, 2017 03:42

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 14, 2024 00:47

Mirthless: Mar 27, 2011; by the sex ghost

La Brea Carpet posted:

Continuing tattoo chat

Wanna see that "traditional" wolf tattoo.

it's probably something similar to this:

traditional generally means it's done in a style similar to "Sailor Jerry" tattoos

Antivehicular posted:

Are Friday the 13th tattoos a thing?

Normally I'm really skeptical of any brides who get really anal-retentive about how people look for wedding photos, but in this case I'm kind of leaning towards the sister. Those tats sound ghastly.

many (most?) tattoo parlors will do Friday the 13th tattoo deals where you get a small tattoo, usually for $13.00

i don't have any tattoos btw

# ? Jan 14, 2017 03:53

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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