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All these open relationships on reddit... whales swapping whales, blubbery love for everyone except the bf
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 10:40 |
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# ? May 14, 2024 19:06 |
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remigious posted:I wish that breaking up was more socially acceptable in our culture. So many people's lives would be vastly improved. Breaking up should be celebrated, not stigmatized! I mean, it's sad of course, but ultimately for the best. I think this thread is the celebration of breaking up; a glorious festival of mundane horrors that sing the praises of breaking up as a concept, lifestyle choice and even religion (in the sense that a religion is a belief system that offers salvation from damnation). Moon Atari fucked around with this message at 14:40 on Jan 14, 2017 |
# ? Jan 14, 2017 14:37 |
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Another entry in the age gap files.quote:I(30f) got caught putting a gps in my boyfriend (51m) car because he doesn't tell me where he is. Got caught, and wants to end relationship. We have 3 kids "No, I'm not having sex with her. Just taking her to dinner and staying at her house in the middle of the night. What's your problem?"
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 15:13 |
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Bonster posted:Another entry in the age gap files. They met when she was 18, which would make him 39.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 15:16 |
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People are pointing out that it sounds an awful lot like she and her kids are not the only family he has. She owns the house and pays for pretty much everything, he chips in now and then and has dinner once a week at 8:30, and is almost never home.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 15:19 |
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WampaLord posted:They met when she was 18, which would make him 39. And now he met another 18 year old
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 15:26 |
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How do these guys keep up with having multiple family? Hell, my mom was only raising me and my sister and she would still get our names confused, imagine having like 10 secret kids you're trying to hid from family #3. Slipping up by calling Timmy Billy and the whole house of cards comes falling down.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 15:56 |
Lonely Virgil posted:How do these guys keep up with having multiple family? Hell, my mom was only raising me and my sister and she would still get our names confused, imagine having like 10 secret kids you're trying to hid from family #3. Slipping up by calling Timmy Billy and the whole house of cards comes falling down. Give them the same names.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 16:13 |
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How to make my weird friendzone experience suck less? u/yeahimbeingabitch5y Hello you wonderful folks of r/relationships, I'm another member of the dreaded friendzone however it seems to be a bit more developed than the usual friendzone. Background: She is my best friend of many years and we’ve always been very close. She openly just calls me her brother and has told me she has no romantic feelings for me. I’m accepting of this and harbor no resentment towards her for not being attracted to me and hold nothing against her dating other guys. This is all typical friendzone stuff but she’s oddly clingy to me as well. She hates it when I talk to other girls and show them more attention. If I’m out spending time with a female friend I’ll get texts asking “do you miss me?” or “do you love me?” If I mention another girl she’ll always ask “yes, but I’m cuter right?” or “But you love me more, right?” Whenever we walk together anywhere at several points she’ll hold my hand and will keep grabbing on no matter how often I try to break it. If we’re just by ourselves or with a group of friends, she’ll constantly hug me throughout the night and constantly kiss me on the cheeks without warning at random intervals. When she was dating her last boyfriend she specifically told me “I think I’d be more upset if I saw a girl all over you than if I saw a girl all over my boyfriend.” Mindfuck, amirite? So despite this really weird arrangement, I know I’m in the friendzone and I’m okay with being here because I really do love having her as a friend and spending time goofing around with her. But I’ll see her flirting with other guys or getting very chummy with her ex boyfriend and I’ll get upset/jealous (never vocal, but sucks nonetheless). So is there any way to make these feelings subside or numb them without having to lose one of my closest friends? I realize this probably makes me sound rather pathetic so that's why I'm coming to you outrageously, gorgeous people. Thanks folks Also, please let me know if more details are necessary or if things need to be clarified. Tl;dr How do I stop being so emo despite my really weird friendzone experience?
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:07 |
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quote:I’m accepting of this and harbor no resentment towards her for not being attracted to me and hold nothing against her dating other guys. How christlike
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:11 |
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My [43M] alcoholic BIL [44M] tried to force himself on his wife[38F] and my sons [18M,17M] helped their aunt by restraining him. Now my wife[40F] wants to punish our sons for "assaulting" their uncle. u/loudloudloud121m Hey there. I feel like I've done everything in my powers to convince my wife that she is wrong in this but she doesn't budge. And it sucks that our kids have to pay for this. Fair warning, this is long. To make a long story short, my BIL is an alcoholic. Ana (my wife) is practically the only family member of his family that still talks to him. He has long ago abandoned his wife and his daughters and now lives with some other woman who I can only guess also shares his habit of drinking. He now spends most of his days drinking or stalking and harassing his daughter and his ex-wife, begging them to take him back. Before his behavior worsened, I didn't mind him at all. Ana would deal with him almost every time. He used to stop by the house, he'd spend some time with my wife, she would usually give him some money and he'd be on his way. Now with his behavior escalating (the whole stalking and harassing), I asked my wife not have him around the house to which she agreed. She would see him again but it's usually outside. I've talked with Ana about this, that maybe it's time he gets some help and that maybe it will be for the best they cut contact for a while until he gets better. To which she replied that she can't, she feels responsible for him and can't abandon her brother. I didn't want to cause a huge scene over this, it's her brother after all and I couldn't force her to cut him out so I just reiterated to her that I don't want him around the house. I didn't want our kids to be exposed to his behavior. We have three, our sons that I have mentioned and our daughter [15F]. They are amazing kids and I can't be thankful enough to Ana for how she raised them. She was a SAHM in the beginning but now works full-time. My sons get on extremely well with their cousins (BIL's daughters). They practically grew up together because my BIL's wife would often come to our house and my wife would help her with them. Now here is the issue. A few days ago it was one of the cousin's 15th birthday and me, my wife and our two sons were there. It was a nice party and we had a good time. Until I heard a commotion in the kitchen. I went there and I saw my sons restraining their uncle while their aunt looked a bit shaken up. My sons explained that they came into the kitchen and they saw their uncle trying to force himself on their aunt (later she'd explain he tried to kiss her) and had his arms around her which from where my sons were standing looked like he was choking her. So they just restrained him. My oldest son pulled his arms away from her, while my younger son grabbed him from the back. They didn't punch him, slapped him or anything like that. They just removed him from their aunt. My wife came into the room shortly after me and her brother told her that he wanted to pay a visit to his daughter and spend the day with his family and that her sons assaulted him while he was talking to his wife. He also said that this isn't the first time they did this. He was obviously under the influence of alcohol but my wife wasn't interested in this. Ana almost immediately told our sons to get in the car and wait there. She took her brother outside, they talked for a bit, came back in, talked with her SIL and she said to me that she will be taking the boys home. I followed her shortly after that in my car and once I entered our home, all Hell broke loose. My wife was arguing with our oldest son and she was pissed. I honestly never saw her so angry before. She told him he must be out of his mind to assault his uncle like that. She also told him that as of now most of his privileges (like his car, phone, his gaming stuff) are taken away. Also, my wife forbid my son from appearing in this local boxing tournament that he has waited for about a year now. When my son said that he is 18 now and she can't tell him what he can and can't do, my wife told him that if he indeed goes to said tournament, he can kiss his college fund goodbye. I tried to intervene but my wife just said in a very angry tone to stay out of this. I've never seen my son look so defeated. He just screamed at my wife to go to Hell and stormed into his room. Mind you this is the first time he yells at his mom like that. I had a very lengthy argument with my wife over this. I told her that this is wrong, that our sons did what was right, they saw someone in need and helped them. Just like we've raised them. But my wife was adamant that they attacked him unprovoked and this needs to stop. Apparently, Mark (our oldest) slapped his uncle once while he was talking to his daughters outside of school a few months ago. I never heard of such a thing from Mark (and we do share a lot) so this is all on my BIL word that this happened. I bet if I call my nieces (I don't know if this is the right term, English isn't my first language so correct me if I am wrong here) and ask them, they will confirm that nothing like this has ever happened. I also know my son pretty well. Mark is not violent, he is boxing but it's for completely different reasons. Ana said that this is also my fault. Apparently, me trying to normalize our son's behavior is part of the problem. She also said that what she is doing is right and that if I was doing the same, we wouldn't have been in this situation. She also said that she will find a fitting punishment of our other son. I saw that we are getting nowhere so I've once again told her that what she is doing isn't right, that she needs to reconsider her behavior otherwise she risks alienating her son which I am sure she loves deeply. I left the house shortly after our argument, I tried to talk for a bit with my son who didn't felt like talking at all before I left but I promised him I will help him with this. I am currently on a work related trip on the other side of the country and I don't know what to actually do. I know I promised my son I will fix this but I don't know how. I love my wife but this thing with her brother needs to end. She takes his word for everything and she doesn't even see that this hurts her family. I don't know what else can I do to show her that her brother is a lost cause who doesn't want to get help and just keeps crawling back to her whenever he needs money. This whole thing makes me resort to something I absolutely detest, ultimatums. But I don't want to go ahead with this because I don't know how she would react to it. I absolutely do not want to lose my wife, not over her alcoholic brother and his lovely behavior and I don't know what to do. I think I can get to my wife the usual way. By talking to her but I don't know what to say and how to make her see that what she is doing is wrong. I guess my point is, what would you do/say if you were in my position? How would you handle this? I can definitely use some outside perspective on this and I will be forever grateful to you if you help me. tl;dr My BIL is an alcoholic who spends most of his days drinking and harassing his family. During a birthday part of one of his daughters, my BIL showed up drunk and he tried to force himself on his wife. My sons saw that and they helped their aunt by restraining their uncle and now my wife wants to punish our sons for assaulting their uncle and already caused a sh*t storm with our oldest by taking away his privileges. He also allegedly attacked his uncle a few months ago but I doubt that this is true. My wife doesn't want to see that her brother's behavior is toxic and it causes problems in our marriage and she doesn't think that what she is doing wrong.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:22 |
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this isn't friendzone this is on the hook zone
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:23 |
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Bonster posted:People are pointing out that it sounds an awful lot like she and her kids are not the only family he has. She owns the house and pays for pretty much everything, he chips in now and then and has dinner once a week at 8:30, and is almost never home. drat, this dude seriously has it made in the shade. Im genuinely amazed at how little this woman expects from her partner who she has been with for 13 years and has multiple children with and how the guy couldnt even be bothered to come up with a story that wasnt "I drove another woman home then slept at her place". Lady do no alarm bells go off in your head that your boyfriend appears to be carefully managing his life such that he cant be arrested for tax fraud or bigamy charges? How many families do you all think he currently has, family requires at least one child? Im setting the over under at 2.5.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:28 |
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Bonster posted:Another entry in the age gap files. Holy poo poo. This sounds exactly like what my ex was worried about me doing to her . Only we were the same age and neither of us have kids or were ever married. She did background checks on me in all the states surrounding were I've ever lived to see if I had a marriage license anywhere. She would also grab my phone out of my hands and go through all of my text messages and randomly text my friends from my phone saying poo poo like "I'm hanging out with my super awesome girlfriend! Yay!" We didn't work out.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:30 |
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bone app the teeth posted:this isn't friendzone this is on the hook zone Yes, this is actually cruel and very inappropriate.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:35 |
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Ride The Gravitron posted:My [43M] alcoholic BIL [44M] tried to force himself on his wife[38F] and my sons [18M,17M] helped their aunt by restraining him. Now my wife[40F] wants to punish our sons for "assaulting" their uncle. the wife and uncle. Also, what is with stories where the poster says 'Please forgive me, English isn't my first language!' but proceed to write much better than all the assumed natives who write poo poo like 'Alot of people don't see how the relationship is effected by my boyfriend and I?'
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:37 |
Sammus posted:Holy poo poo. This sounds exactly like what my ex was worried about me doing to her . Only we were the same age and neither of us have kids or were ever married. She did background checks on me in all the states surrounding were I've ever lived to see if I had a marriage license anywhere. She would also grab my phone out of my hands and go through all of my text messages and randomly text my friends from my phone saying poo poo like "I'm hanging out with my super awesome girlfriend! Yay!" Actually that sounds nothing like your story at all unless you were also cheating on your girlfriend and spending no time with her.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:38 |
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Clocks posted:Actually that sounds nothing like your story at all unless you were also cheating on your girlfriend and spending no time with her. I was not, I was just referring to the trust issue, and the fact that my ex even said once that she was worried I had another family somewhere. Probably should have included that detail originally though.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:41 |
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quote:My [18M] sister [24F] got all pissed off at me because I asked her son [2M] to pass my beer to meNon-Romantic
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:44 |
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Wtf
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:50 |
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bone app the teeth posted:this isn't friendzone this is on the hook zone This dude needs to just leave her. If hed like he can do a "put up or shut up", but honestly somebody this annoying isnt worth trying to have a relationship with so just move on.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 17:55 |
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Bonster posted:Another entry in the age gap files. Jesus, this is why I'm against age gaps in relationships on principle and gently caress your grandparents' allegedly happy marriage or how your one friend dated a guy ten years older than her (she was 28) and it all worked out. That man essentially groomed and broke a human being so thoroughly she is willing to eat any amount of poo poo he feeds her. She's never had another adult relationship before, why wouldn't she have believed everything he told her at the beginning about how relationships were supposed to work? Any older person who seeks out and dates teenagers is honestly probably a predator looking for someone who's too naive to recognize their garbage. This obviously is more socially sanctioned for older man/younger woman, but any combination of genders in that situation is Bad News. Ugh I'm sorry that story just makes me so angry and sad, one person neutering another's life and ambitions for their comfort is my trigger I guess.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 18:09 |
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Play posted:Something a bit different, from a new story. Sorry about the crappy formatting, wasn't me Now I'm going to be the last person to defend child rape but because things like this get anti-feminists in a twist I'm going to remind you that women get shorter jail sentences because society sees women as inherently harmless caretakers. Courts don't take them seriously, and you should blame them instead of women. xtal fucked around with this message at 18:36 on Jan 14, 2017 |
# ? Jan 14, 2017 18:26 |
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Guys please need advice [28F] I tried to play hard to get and it backfired, now he [34M] is not calling me or texting me?? u/anongirl443222d I took advice from my stupid friends and they told me that if you make him work for your affection, it always ends up in a better relationship that's guaranteed to turn long term.. when he puts in effort to make u open to him.... or so they said I tried this with this guy I met recently at a convention (related to my work) and we had a few dates and I really liked him, but I tried to do it as my friends said and acted like I wasn't sooo interested (even though I was falling deep inside), and played down his advances towards me... he didn't push too hard and was very polite & a gentleman... anyway its been almost a week now since our last date and he hasnt texted me or called me... i texted once saying Hi and what he's up to... but no reply , and I have no idea how else to get in touch with him... did I drive him away from my silly move?? I really want him back... atleast, want to talk with him so I can be more clear about my feelings.... I regret this so much, he was so wonderful! TL:DR - tried to be a smart rear end and played hard to get, drove him away possibly
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 18:33 |
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sounds like he dodged a massive drama bullet to me
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 18:36 |
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Dude made the right choice. In the modern era hard to get means either not interested or drama ridden.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 18:51 |
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God, she's 28. Isn't that a bit old for this kind of thing?
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 19:06 |
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well thats why shes single
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 19:07 |
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Ride The Gravitron posted:Guys please need advice [28F] I tried to play hard to get and it backfired, now he [34M] is not calling me or texting me?? Also if you listen to your friends for that dumb of a suggestion it does not bode well for other decision making
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 19:08 |
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54 40 or gently caress posted:How christlike tbh read the rest of the post and he kind of is that girl is an emotional vampire and he should immediately "you're hung up on me, and I don't want to date you, but you're also not allowed to date" is one of the most bizarre things you hear about again and again and again, I just don't understand it
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 19:09 |
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Ride The Gravitron posted:My [43M] alcoholic BIL [44M] tried to force himself on his wife[38F] and my sons [18M,17M] helped their aunt by restraining him. Now my wife[40F] wants to punish our sons for "assaulting" their uncle. This dude and his kids sound awesome and his wife is being a lovely enabler. An ultimatum or an intervention of sorts with the family that's cut the brother in law out is absolutely appropriate here. On another note I really, really wish all of the open relationship posts had a rule that you have to post pictures.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 19:44 |
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54 40 or gently caress posted:How christlike Christ was a pretty sassy bitch, laying verbal smackdowns on the fools who called him out on the street, cursing trees and flipping loving tables and whipping bitches.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 19:50 |
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I am serious, it is really terrible to keep a guy on the hook and prevent him from having relationships if you do not have any intention of having a relationship with him yourself
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 20:37 |
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Mirthless posted:tbh read the rest of the post and he kind of is Definitely, guy obviously has some serious self esteem issues and needs to have some drat dignity though. No argument that she sucks. I just thought that line was funny
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 20:43 |
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Pick posted:I am serious, it is really terrible to keep a guy on the hook and prevent him from having relationships if you do not have any intention of having a relationship with him yourself Yeeuup, I had a "friendship" like that fall apart less than a year ago. We were best friends and did everything together and she would constantly viciously tear down her boyfriend to me and yet would stay with him because she knew she could wrap him around his finger and get him to do anything for her...which she could also do to me. And she'd string me along but never actually do anything, and get pissy/weird when I would pursue other girls. It took a lot of distance and time to realize what an awful, lovely person she is.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 21:05 |
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Pick posted:I am serious, it is really terrible to keep a guy on the hook and prevent him from having relationships if you do not have any intention of having a relationship with him yourself Yeah, for all that the friend zone is mostly just where nice guys imagine they live, there are still people out there who actually string people along. I think (this is me personally) that it's tempting to deny that behavior exists at all just because we fear it might galvanize creeps to think that their stalking is fine, she's totally leading me on by telling me we will never have sex but still tolerating me because she feels bad about it! Of course the correct answer to being led on is "lol fuckk u bitch" and then having sex with all the sexy local singles in your area because who the gently caress has time for that poo poo? But emotional attachment is a heck of a drug I don't really hate all men I just pretend on the internet.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 21:27 |
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The corect response is, unironically,, to tell the woman that he wants to open up their relationship.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 21:33 |
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Barudak posted:The corect response is, unironically,, to tell the woman that he wants to open up their relationship. have a kid
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 21:37 |
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Barudak posted:The corect response is, unironically,, to tell the woman that he wants to open up their relationship. Holy poo poo.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 21:37 |
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# ? May 14, 2024 19:06 |
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Me [30F] with my co worker [55?F] 6 months. Co worker called me fat and I am having trouble moving on. (non romantic)quote:I work for a fairly decent sized law firm. I get along with almost everyone there and I am well liked. I even just got a raise after 6 months of being there because I am a good worker and don't cause drama. which is why when I reported my evil co worker to HR I have many mixed feelings. Seething with insulin insensitivity.
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# ? Jan 14, 2017 22:12 |