Mirthless posted:

i don't understand the people who decide to do the swinging/hotwife thing when they have vanilla sex lives

"we've never done anal or sex in x,y,z position or anything past the lightest bondage but I'm gonna let another guy gently caress my wife when I'm out of the country and see what happens"




lol, it was so foul it turned him into a ghost

she should probably see a doctor because unless he's a virgin who's terrified of vaginas i really doubt she's as fine down there as she thinks she is. it's a health problem that happens to a lot of people and maybe she's just used to it or something, but I can't imagine he'd make that kind of reaction on purpose unless it was really loving bad.

Mirthless posted:

i don't understand the people who decide to do the swinging/hotwife thing when they have vanilla sex lives

"we've never done anal or sex in x,y,z position or anything past the lightest bondage but I'm gonna let another guy gently caress my wife when I'm out of the country and see what happens"

Mirthless posted:

i don't understand the people who decide to do the swinging/hotwife thing when they have vanilla sex lives

"we've never done anal or sex in x,y,z position or anything past the lightest bondage but I'm gonna let another guy gently caress my wife when I'm out of the country and see what happens"




lol, it was so foul it turned him into a ghost

she should probably see a doctor because unless he's a virgin who's terrified of vaginas i really doubt she's as fine down there as she thinks she is. it's a health problem that happens to a lot of people and maybe she's just used to it or something, but I can't imagine he'd make that kind of reaction on purpose unless it was really loving bad.

scrubs season six posted:

Seems like Florida and Texas are the two states where you're absolutely guaranteed to not be prosecuted for making a date with this guy and then shooting him dead in self defense.

Just sayin

quote:

Me [23 M] with my boyfriend [24 M] 2.5 years, will not cut his hair, clip toenails, or see doctor without me asking him repeatedly. It is ruining our relationship.[new]

I love my boyfriend to the moon and back, and he is one of my best friends. I have had long term relationships before, but this one really does feel different. I want us to work out our issues; this is not a '"should we break up" post.

My boyfriend Ted and I have been together for about 2.5 years. We have lived together for about a year. Early in the relationship I noticed he had really long toe nails at times (we are talking 2-2.5 inches OVER the nail bed). It didn't really bother me, and he was wearing his socks 90% of the time. After living together I also noticed he didn't seem too concerned about cutting his hair, or brushing it. We moved to a new city 6 months ago, and while he was looking for jobs he still wasn't bothered to brush his hair. This kind of bothered me, which I communicated to him in a polite way. He also refused to brush his hair for date nights, or things like that. He also got very angry at me every time I brought it up. I feel like these are basic things that at 24 year old man should know how to do, or care about. I know I shouldn't be stressing out about his problems, but I really cannot help it.

Another thing I should mention is his recurring sickness. Once every 5-6 weeks he get symptoms of dizziness, nausea and headache. While visiting my family this summer the symptoms prevented him from spending as much time with my family as they (and I) would have hoped. He refuses to book an appointment with his doctor, or even google his symptoms. He is now most likely getting fired from his job for taking too many sick days (4 days in 4 months). He storms out of the room when I tell him to at least try and figure out what this could be, or if there are any ideas online on how to relieve his symptoms.

Sorry for the length! I guess there was more to this issue than I had thought.

The, almost, final thing is his lack of drivers license. For most of our relationship I have been asking him to get a drivers license as I cannot drive in this country (I am from the US). He said when he was 18 he had a very scary and stressful driving lesson, and is not ready to drive again... Now at a time when it very be extremely helpful to have a driver for the household he seems to refuse, with no end in sight.
He can get very mean in fights, and is prone to calling me selfish, and blames me for mistakes he has made (like him coming home late, or being rude to me).
I just don't know how to talk to him about these things anymore. The stress of feeling like Im responsible for his hygiene and health is killing me. He is losing me and doesn't seem bothered by it.

tl;dr: Boyfriend refuses to take care of himself, and some other stuff. Love him to death, but it's making me feel like I am his caretaker.

EDIT: He handles all of the bills, groceries about half the cleaning. The living situation itself is fair and normal (I feel like I am living with an adult).

Regulation Size posted:

I love the good posts. This one and "guy with genetic disorder who can't smell and lost all of his friends and is an unemployed drop out who was nixed from the army and his lovely parents hate his guts" are tops and I'm glad.

La Brea Carpet posted:

The toenail thing just grossed me out.

Also, maybe if he drank gallons of water every day he wouldn't be dizzy. Worked for the other guy.

Pick posted:

wait which one was that?

Ride The Gravitron posted:

The police won't do anything about this complete psychopath (FL) (self.legaladvice)

submitted 14 hours ago by tippedthescaffold

Okay so, I'm not sure what to do about this situation.

There is this guy (I have never met him in person) who has been sending crazy messages over facebook to my friends and I for about a year or so. By that I mean just about everyone I know, I've posted screenshots of it and TONS of people come in saying "this guy harasses me too, who the hell is he?". Social media is weird. Anyways, at first, he was just one of those people who rambled on about weird things (think r/creepypms style posts) and we all thought it was funny and just ignored it and laughed at the messages. Recently, he's been sending us things that are completely over the top, I've called the police three times as have others and they have done nothing. He's made about 20 fake facebooks to send these harassing messages. Here's a list of things he's done: (Should I add a trigger warning of some sort here? Animal abuse, sexual harassment, self harm, rape, manipulation, etc)

sent photos of him mutilating animals (one of a snake cut into pieces, one of him stomping on a snake, a snake in a blender, a tarantula with its legs ripped off)
talked about raping girls and having sex with underage girls
threatening to kill, torture, rape me/whoever he is messaging at the time
videos of him having sex, putting needles through girls' skin, masturbating
photos of his wrists slit/blood all over his body were sent to my roommate. she called the police, he went to a mental hospital for three days, that's all that happened.
telling people he will do x if they do not do y. for example: he told ANOTHER friend of mine that if she didn't meet up with him for a date he'd kill one of his pets. She didn't do it, he made a fake facebook and sent her photos of the animal dead.

He lives in Florida, I now live in Texas. Just tonight my roommate saw messages from him for the first time in a while telling her he'd kill another one of his snakes then proceeding to send photos of it dead. We called the police department where he lives right after the first message was sent and they told us they'd "get back to us". I'm assuming that again, they will just bakeract him for three days and that will be it. Is there any way I can get them to comply or arrest him? Isn't animal abuse a felony?

La Brea Carpet posted:

The toenail thing just grossed me out.

Antivehicular posted:

I'm sure this makes me a shallow bitch Stacy, but "toenails 2 inches beyond nail bed, won't clip unless nagged to death and maybe not then" is completely a breakup offense for me. Seriously, how does that dude even wear shoes? Holy poo poo.

Pvt.Scott posted:

Socks and 'stocks, yo.

La Brea Carpet posted:

The toenail thing just grossed me out.

Also, maybe if he drank gallons of water every day he wouldn't be dizzy. Worked for the other guy.

Antivehicular posted:

I'm sure this makes me a shallow bitch Stacy, but "toenails 2 inches beyond nail bed, won't clip unless nagged to death and maybe not then" is completely a breakup offense for me. Seriously, how does that dude even wear shoes? Holy poo poo.

Barudak posted:

Now maybe im not hip to what the kids are up to these days but isnt the point of hotwifery just a more pleasant way to say cuckoldry fetish? I thought the whole point of that was to have your spouse be more fulfilled sexually with someone else as the ultimate humiliation? Like if not, what exactly was this dudes gameplan?

Antivehicular posted:

I'm sure this makes me a shallow bitch Stacy, but "toenails 2 inches beyond nail bed, won't clip unless nagged to death and maybe not then" is completely a breakup offense for me. Seriously, how does that dude even wear shoes? Holy poo poo.

Ride The Gravitron posted:

My (27M) Real Dad (60s?) found out about my wedding and is insisting in going.

u/ErikkVEVO2h

So when I was about 18 I cut contact from my dad due to the fact how horrible he was to me. He made my childhood miserable however I met my current SO (26F) who I'm soon to get married to at 19. I lived in an apartment to finish off school both of which I had to pay with the money I saved prior to moving out. It wasn't easy but I got through and now have a decent job. Time and time again my dad knowing that I have a really high paying job will ask for money. Here's where it gets complicated, when I first met my SO she asked to meet my family so I told her my mom died and that I'm not sure she wants to meet my dad. I didn't feel comfortable exposing her and even myself to him but given we were 3 months within our relationship she insists on meeting him. So I put an ad on a website trying to "purchase" a guy to be my father and would pay him to go to dinner with me and my SO. So the dinner went well and a couple more time I paid this guy to be there for me and pretend to be my dad. Well eventually me and him become extremely close and he becomes my father figure and knows it. Background about him is his wife cheated on him and left him while also having no kids although he always wanted them. He became my rock and I became his. He practically was my father.

Now the problem is my bio dad heard I have no idea from who I'm getting married and he knows the place/time and wants to be there. However I rather have my paid dad (even though he hasn't been paid for 6 years) be there just because he was there for me more than my bio dad. My fear is that my bio dad might show up at the wedding or my house and everything will go crashing down. What should I do Reddit?

TL;DR - Dad I paid money to be my dad has become my father figure and now my bio dad wants to come to my wedding as well and insists on going.

zakharov posted:

How do these losers manage to get married

My husband [M/22] says that I [F/21] should look good purely for his satisfaction. I have no right to feel good about it. What do you think about this ?

Pick posted:

sell the movie options

Mirthless posted:

the hotwife fetish is a cuckold fetish without the humiliation angle, with the male partner often being the dominant one in the scenario. for a cuckold fetish, the partner being cuckolded is usually always submissive.

Pvt.Scott posted:

Hotwifing sounds like hotswapping electronics to me. Dangerous.

quote:

My[27f] husband[27m] and I wanted to make a sex tape, I told him about one I made previously, he found the old one now things in our marriage are falling apart.

I was told this was the more approrpiate subreddit so I am posting here.

My husband and I have been married for only over a year and now things are looking really badly. My husband recently was gifted a really nice camera for his birthday and with it he really wanted to make a sex tape.

On the topic I suggested that we bring some extra lights in our bedroom for better lighting, he asked me in a joking manner if I was a porn director. I told him I made one in the past. After looking at his face I realized how much I just hosed up. He stopped dead still and asked me in a solemn voice was it with Mark (fake name).

Mark was a guy I dated in the past, he was the first guy that I thought I loved. With him I did a lot of stuff I wasn’t comfortable with but I did because I wanted his love and attention. He used me for a long time till I decided to cut him off. I have told my husband about him and he really doesn’t like him.

I told my husband it was him, but it didn’t matter that I wanted to create new memories with him. My husband told me that he felt sick and was done. He ended up leaving the house and left his phone at home. He came back home later in the night, I made him his favorite dinner but he already ate out.

We finally did talk about it. He says that he is angry that this guy Mark has put so much distance between us. He said that he wanted to make a sex tape and thought it would be a new experience we could share together, but the fact that Mark already made one with me ruined it. And he hates that there is a video like that of me on his computer, and the he probably showed it to all of his friends.

My husband cooled off after talking to me, and I thought things got better. But then he got really angry and cold. He found my old lap top that was broken and recovered the hard drive, and found the video I made with Mark. The thing that makes the video especially damaging was that in the video I am a lot more vocal than I am with my husband, and I am doing things in there that I don’t do with my husband.

Since then he has given me the silent treatment. I have tried doing things to get him to open up and talk to me, but now it feels like my marriage is falling apart. Before all of this we were talking about starting a family together, but now I don’t know where we are. My husband comes home from work and will just go somewhere and not answer my text or calls. What do I do?

tl;dr- i made a sex tape in the past with an ex, husband found out about tape, now he has been giving me the silent treatment help.

quote:

Me[29M] with my fiancee [28F] of one year (2 year dating), she found a sex tape of me and my ex from 5 years ago that was deleated but came back after a disc recovery. I Fear that it made my fiancee mentally ill.

So after a doing a disc recovery on my computer, old files, as old as from 2005 surfaced without me noticing due tho wierd folder names being created automatically. In one there was a five year old video of me and my ex having sex, somthing I had deleted after we broke up.

My fiancee found it and was very upset and hurt by it. I apologized profusely and assured here that I did not know about it, something she eventually believed but it made little difference. Nor any reassuaranced that we have no contact, I have not had any feelings for anybody else since we met and that I love her and only her.

She says that it's all she can think about and she was in hysterics the first few days. She drank/drinks alot (something she never does) She would cry and scream and lie on the floor (she is very pedantic about cleanliness and this would normally be unthinkable to her) and she would cry for hours on end. She threw the engagement ring on the floor, but reluctantly accepted it again a few days later. She barley eats and she has extreme moodswings altering between telling me how filthy, sick and disgusting I am to what a wonderful person I am after all.

She sometimes is unresponsive to my talking to her and just starts to talk nonsens like: "Hey that cloud is really beautiful. Look at that pretty cloud" and when I do look at the indeed pretty cloud, she just repeats the same thing over and over no matter what I say.

She is Japanese and moved from Japan to my country to live with me here (we met in Japan). She has had a hard time to adapt to life here but trying really hard and keeping alot of things inside which are now comming out all at once. She has a mother who imho has some issues with her mental health, being extremelly pedantic and obsessive about what she considers to be "dirty" things. She also has a sister who has a mental disorder and I am wondering if maybe she had some latent mental problem that surfaced due to what happened.

I will find her sitting on the floor very often or even sleeping on it. She has started to leave a mess around herself. She talks about having thoughts about destroying stuff in our apartment, but claims that she never would. This is something she has said before this happened when I started to notice that she was feeling a lot of stress from living here. She has no close friends here and no close relationship with her family and feels very lonely in many ways.

She has acted very wierd ever since the incident. Since she was drinking alot I first assumed it was the alcohol, but I have started to suspect that the shock triggered some latent mental unhealth in her. Or maybe

I wish I knew what to do to help her feel better. I am thinking that maybe she needs to go home for a while to her country and spend time with friends and family and the world that she knows. But I am scared that she never will come back if she leaves. But what I feel is irrelevant, I want to do whatever I can for this girl to make her feel happy again.

Does anybody have any suggestion as to what I should do?

tl;dr: My fiancee found a five year old sex tape with me and my ex. She is inconsolable, maye have triggered mental issues. What is the best thing I can do for her?

UPDATE: She is no longer in freak-out mode and is acting rationally again, eating, drinking and sleeping in a normal way. We have talked alot about other underlying issues and about her feeling isolated. We met a Japanese girl who, while beeing quite younger than her, at least was someone for her to talk with. She has also been meeting some of her friends and she said she was able to talk a little bit about our/her problems. We've been discussing different ways for her to be more independent here and have more of her own life, rather than just being dependent on me. She is more open to therapy now. Your many good advice were very helpful and I want to thank you all for all support, without you guys I had been left with my own crappy ideas and words, you really made a difference!

quote:

Me [19M], my sister [21F] found a video of our mom [45F] she thinks its of her cheating, but I think it might not be. We can't agree what to do with it.

My sister found this video on my mom's laptop. I think she was using her laptop for some school stuff and she must have gone snooping through her personal files.

She found this video, its from a few years ago according to the date of the file. Its definitely our mom in the video, and it looks to be in some hotel room. There's definitely a man in the video, but he's holding the camera and we don't see his face or hear his voice. I don't want to go into any detail but its basically a striptease/sex tape filmed by the man, so while our mom is clearly identifiable, I can't tell exactly who the man is.

I first got angry at my sister for showing it to me, I told her this is gross, I don't want to see that. She told me she thinks it could mean our mom is cheating on our dad and we should at least present the information to our dad.

I told her its very likely its him in the photo (you can see the man's hands in a few shots), I think its my dad, she seems to think its not him.

I told her if we show it to them and it is him, not only will we be embarrassed, but they would be mad at her for snooping. She was like "why do you care? I'm the one who did the snooping, so only I'll get in trouble. I'll cover you if they try to get mad at you."

I told her there has to be a more sensitive way of approaching the situation, instead of just bombarding our parents with "hey we saw your sex tape which could either be with you or mom's secret lover", and we should consider the fallout. However she seems pretty adamant that she just wants to show them, she thinks its the safest option; since if she was cheating, she gets exposed, but if it was just dad, then no harm done.

We can't agree on what to do, and I have a feeling she might show it to them regardless of what I feel, but if I push hard enough I might convince her of an alternative solution. Any ideas on what we should do?

tl;dr: Sister found a sex tape involving our mom on the computer; guy's face is not visible. I think its dad, sister thinks its another man and she's cheating. She wants to confront them with the evidence, but I think we'd be in trouble if we do and we should find a more sensitive solution to what's going on (if anything is going on).

quote:

An update, things don't go so well. Original: Me [19M], my sister [21F] found a video of our mom [45F] she thinks its of her cheating, but I think it might not be. We can't agree what to do with it.

Yeah, things didn't go so well unfortunately.

I kept arguing with my sister. I told her if she's so certain they're cheating, the least we could do is ask dad first if he knows about the tape but not mention that we've seen it. She was determined that it was cheating, based on the hands and the feet, she was like "those definitely aren't dads".

I told her she was creepy as gently caress, if that was them in the video, and God knows how many times she's watched it, she was basically watching a video of our mother naked and loving our dad's dick. Even if it wasn't our dad's dick, its still loving gross. She didn't care. I told her if I couldn't stop her, she should at least leave me out of it, i want nothing to do with it.

She went nuclear, she went and told them everything, and embarrassed the gently caress out of herself. Turned out her little detective work was way off, it was dad in the video.

Our dad was angry but mostly bewildered, but he just laughed it off and got over it.

Our mom however didn't take it so well. She had a panic attack, she went nuts. She was like "what the hell is wrong with you kids?" I tried to stay out of it but my sister dragged me into it and named me as her accomplice even though I had warned her against it. Our mom was so hurt and upset, not only that her daughter would so brazely accuse her of cheating, but that her children had watched an explicit sex tape of her. She was really traumatized, she couldn't take it any more.

She got up and left to her parents house where she's been there for a whole day to recuperate. She only called our dad to speak to, she won't speak to us. Our dad told us to just give it time until she's feeling better.

TLDR: nobody was cheating, but my sister hosed up my parents relationship. Mom is crying now and has gone to stay with her parents, won't talk to my sister or me.

Tiny Deer posted:

Goddamn that woman is a menace. I mean yeah, yeah, card games are silly, the boyfriend sounds like a gently caress up, but even I know Magic cards are worth some pretty crazy amounts of money. Enough money, depending on the cards, that maybe we're going to see a follow up post on legaladvice.

'You wronged me, ergo I will get revenge' is not a relationship strategy that generally pans out well.

I'm just always baffled by people who stay in relationships where they clearly just hate their partner. I understand staying for love or affection or security, but I swear some of these people stay out of spite because they know they make their hated partner miserable.

Or, you know, societal pressure to salvage any relationship that's not outright physically abusive, take your pick.

Also Jesus lady $150???? You date a guy with binders of Magic cards and you don't even know from his screeching every time you even look at them too hard that they're VALUABLE, AMY, DON'T loving TOUCH MY CARDS!

MAKE NO BABBYS posted:

...are random collections really THAT valuable? I have like four binders full from the late 90s/early 00s

Gaunab posted:

MAKE NO BABBYS posted:

...are random collections really THAT valuable? I have like four binders full from the late 90s/early 00s

zakharov posted:

Spanking is one of those things that infuriates me because people just won't see reason on it

"Well everyone in my family was spanked and we turned out fine!"

and now we know more about how "physical discipline" fucks up a child's mind, and no you didn't turn out fine because you're expressing a desire to assault your children

Gaunab posted:

A comedy of errors

Gaunab posted:

2 year dating
deleated
wierd
somthing
assured here
reassuranced
alot
She barley eats
moodswings
nonsens
comming out
extremelly
unhealth
have any suggestion
maye
beeing
many good advice

quote:

She would cry and scream and lie on the floor (she is very pedantic about cleanliness and this would normally be unthinkable to her)

Themata posted:

tells me they must wear shoes in the house?? Disgusting.

Lonely Virgil posted:

Japanese people wear slippers in the house, but not outside shoes or designated toilet shoes.