/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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Cough Drop The Beat: Jan 22, 2012; by Lowtax

Pick posted:

Me [28/F] with my husband [30 M] married 5 years; together 7, Fed up of husband's stinginess when grocery shopping or eating out

This girl and her cheap rear end in a top hat husband could do all their grocery shopping at Whole Foods for the next year and it wouldn't impact them at all. They make 180k combined! It's comical that dude cares so much.

Basically, :murder:

# ? Jan 25, 2017 13:24

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# ? May 14, 2024 11:21

TheScott2K: Oct 26, 2003; I'm just saying, there's a nonzero chance Trump has a really toad penis.

Honestly if you're making 180k combined at that age and don't have kids yet, be cheap as gently caress and put as much away as you can. A lot of spending becomes non optional down the road. That way they could retire way earlier.

Source: I set a bunch of money on fire eating out and shopping at whole foods in my 20s and that poo poo adds up

# ? Jan 25, 2017 14:28

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Nothing wrong with frugality, dude just needs to pick a few things to splurge on. Like chocolate. His wife seems to like good quality chocolate. Get some good stuff, not sour-milky ameritrash

# ? Jan 25, 2017 14:43

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

Pvt.Scott posted:

Nothing wrong with frugality

People always say this, but yes, there is something wrong with frugality when it gets to this level. Money is a tool to live life with, not score points to accumulate and never touch.

Paying an extra $1/lb for strawberries isn't going to put them in the poor house. Let her indulge in this, she's not dipping into the 401k for grocery money or anything.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 14:47

Mirthless: Mar 27, 2011; by the sex ghost

WampaLord posted:

People always say this, but yes, there is something wrong with frugality when it gets to this level. Money is a tool to live life with, not score points to accumulate and never touch.

Paying an extra $1/lb for strawberries isn't going to put them in the poor house. Let her indulge in this, she's not dipping into the 401k for grocery money or anything.

Yeah, if you have 180k/yr coming in you are really past the point where it makes sense to bargain hunt for groceries and he needs to get over this behavior for himself just as much as he does for his clearly fed up wife

Some people never learn how to spend money, and they're the ones who end up dying rich, bitter, and alone. Frugality's good but don't take it too far.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 14:53

Larry Parrish: Jul 9, 2012; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

I'm still waiting for the post about the hobby-obsessed boyfriend who's always in the garage, covered in wood dust, reeking like woodstain and varnish, selling cabinets on Etsy after work

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:02

Mirthless: Mar 27, 2011; by the sex ghost

Larry Parrish posted:

I'm still waiting for the post about the hobby-obsessed boyfriend who's always in the garage, covered in wood dust, reeking like woodstain and varnish, selling cabinets on Etsy after work

you'll never see that post b/c i'm pretty sure the scent of sawdust and varnish is an aphrodisiac

seriously though these posts are never about the husband who can't tear himself away from his workbench, it's always the weird anime goon who can't stop spending their rent money on rare figures]

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:05

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

Mirthless posted:

seriously though these posts are never about the husband who can't tear himself away from his workbench, it's always the weird anime goon who can't stop spending their rent money on rare figures]

Those wives are happily having affairs and thus don't need to post.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:09

Cough Drop The Beat: Jan 22, 2012; by Lowtax

Pvt.Scott posted:

Nothing wrong with frugality, dude just needs to pick a few things to splurge on. Like chocolate. His wife seems to like good quality chocolate. Get some good stuff, not sour-milky ameritrash

There's absolutely nothing wrong with clipping some coupons and shopping at Kroger and Aldi over Whole Foods, but a couple making combined 180k should be buying all the fresh strawberries and chocolate they want without really caring ever. Her husband is a terribly inconsiderate dickhead.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:18

well why not: Feb 10, 2009

It's a bit suspicious to be so frugal on 90k, let alone double that. Dude might need therapy but I feel like that's more salvageable than most of the posts we lol at.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:21

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

It's not how much you make, it's how much you keep. Being frugal is always good.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:30

shame on an IGA: Apr 8, 2005

Moridin920 posted:

to expand on this,

On Reddit or similar sites I have literally seen people sit down and work out how many 'miles' of dick a girl has taken based on average number of times loving with a bf and average dick size and average number of strokes they've pulled out of their rear end like:

Girl who had 1 bf, dated for 2 years loving 2x a week:
8 fucks a month, 6 inches, 40 strokes per orgasm - 160 feet per month or 1920ft per year. 3840 total feet of dick taken. NOT SLUT

Girl who is "promiscuous" and has had 10 boyfriends over the course of 4 years at 3-4x fucks a week:
4 x 6 inch x 40 strokes = 960 ft/mo or 11520/yr = 46,080 feet of dick taken = 8.7 miles. HIGH MILEAGE PUSSY - SLUT!

Thus LOGICALLY you see how a girl who has had many boyfriends is not an ideal partner nor is a girl who is too old an ideal partner because LOOSE PUSSY.

people are loving stupid

The fact they use 40 strokes per sexual encounter as an average really explains everything, dont it

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:30

TheScott2K: Oct 26, 2003; I'm just saying, there's a nonzero chance Trump has a really toad penis.

Mirthless posted:

you'll never see that post b/c i'm pretty sure the scent of sawdust and varnish is an aphrodisiac

seriously though these posts are never about the husband who can't tear himself away from his workbench, it's always the weird anime goon who can't stop spending their rent money on rare figures]

Kinda tells you something about the worthlessness of most people's "hobbies." Amassing junk isn't a hobby, it's a compulsion. You're not learning anything or growing in any way by doing it. A man who spends all his free time in a wood shop will emerge with furniture to give his wife, each piece better-assembled than the one before. There is a primal instinct to reward that. A goober excitedly opening an eBay box with a thing in it that's going on a shelf has none of that.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:31

Andrast: Apr 21, 2010

Leon Einstein posted:

It's not how much you make, it's how much you keep. Being frugal is always good.

Except when being frugal makes you or your partner unhappy.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:32

Bubblyblubber: Nov 17, 2014

shame on an IGA posted:

The fact they use 40 strokes per sexual encounter as an average really explains everything, dont it

Yeah, who even has the time for 40 strokes these days? Bunch of layabouts.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:34

Cough Drop The Beat: Jan 22, 2012; by Lowtax

Andrast posted:

Except when being frugal makes you or your partner unhappy.

Exactly. If that girl's husband wants to be an emotionless robot and look at their financial situation as "Beep boop, cannot contribute $3 towards strawberries for wifely unit, must stay on stringent regulations and object strongly", then he better be happy with heading to divorce. Being an unyielding cheap jerk who never listens to your spouse is not a smart idea.

Cough Drop The Beat fucked around with this message at 16:02 on Jan 25, 2017

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:38

Spooooon!!!: Apr 4, 2013

To continue shoe chat, the first time I met my GF's parents I did not understand the shoes off in the house thing, because none of my friends gave a poo poo. Well, her family is very traditional (and Asian). I made the mistake of ignoring the hints she dropped at taking them off the first time we went to their house, and her mom not only made me get up and take them off, she smacked me in the rear end with a slipper on the way to do it and yelled at me in Chinese. I like her mom. That's my story thank you for reading. :downs:

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:41

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

Andrast posted:

Except when being frugal makes you or your partner unhappy.

Yeah, I think he crosses the line into miserly.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:48

tater_salad: Sep 15, 2007

There's frugality, then there is being cheap. This guy is being cheap.

When I buy something I always check where the best deal is.. I just bought a camera body and wanted it before I go on a trip friday. First I looked around for the best priced body that had the features I wanted
I looked at 3-4 sites to get the best deal when looking at shipping and taxes, I saved myself about $50 on taxes and shipping, then also cashed in some gift cards for amazon that were "Free money" for doing health surveys at work. That's frugal.

Wanting to get into photography and buying a $20 digital camera is being cheap.

Sticking to a block of Costco cheddar cheese as the only cheese you can use when you are pulling 180k a year combined, is cheap.
Buying a better cheese or one you want to actually when the store may have a sale, or has a special on cheese that has to be used in the week is frugal.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:50

Mirthless: Mar 27, 2011; by the sex ghost

Leon Einstein posted:

It's not how much you make, it's how much you keep. Being frugal is always good.

You can't take it with you, dude

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:52

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

shame on an IGA posted:

The fact they use 40 strokes per sexual encounter as an average really explains everything, dont it

It's all about efficiency. If you can't masturbate to completion in under 10 strokes, have you even been trying to hone your technique all these years? The extra 30 stroke are for the ladies. :corrupt:

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:55

54 40 or fuck: Jan 4, 2012; No Yanda's allowed

Spooooon!!! posted:

To continue shoe chat, the first time I met my GF's parents I did not understand the shoes off in the house thing, because none of my friends gave a poo poo. Well, her family is very traditional (and Asian). I made the mistake of ignoring the hints she dropped at taking them off the first time we went to their house, and her mom not only made me get up and take them off, she smacked me in the rear end with a slipper on the way to do it and yelled at me in Chinese. I like her mom. That's my story thank you for reading.

Sounds like you were welcomed into the family pretty quickly

# ? Jan 25, 2017 15:59

Afriscipio: Jun 3, 2013

tater_salad posted:

There's frugality, then there is being cheap. This guy is being cheap.

There could also be some crazy debt to pay off that she's not aware of.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 16:45

Andrast: Apr 21, 2010

Afriscipio posted:

There could also be some crazy debt to pay off that she's not aware of.

Then that guy would be cheap AND a :murder:

candidate for not telling his wife about the debt.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 16:47

Batterypowered7: Aug 8, 2009; The mist that chills you keeps me warm.

Mirthless posted:

You can't take it with you, dude

Well of course you don't take your money with you; it's in the bank. You take your debit card with you.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 16:51

the bitcoin of weed: Nov 1, 2014

Afriscipio posted:

There could also be some crazy debt to pay off that she's not aware of.

child support to dozens of illegitimate children

# ? Jan 25, 2017 16:51

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Fullhouse posted:

child support to dozens of illegitimate children

Who he has to support after betting their home, cars, and life insurance policies that he couldnt get them pregnant in one shot.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:04

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

i long for the days of cum chat in this, the dark age of 'these are the times when my family wears shoes'

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:04

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Pick posted:

How do I [29f] get my bf [31m] of ~10 months to stop using my expensive skin care products?

this pisses me off more than cheap husband because he's literally stealing from his gf. good skin products are expensive as hell and this dweeb won't even buy his own.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:09

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

i long for the days of cum chat in this, the dark age of 'these are the times when my family wears shoes'

1. at a picnic
2. waterslide
3. grandpa's funeral
4. airport security (got arrested)

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:10

zakharov: Nov 30, 2002; Tater Love

On mobile, can't post it, but the top 2 threads right now are both about cat centered conflicts.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:12

Demon Of The Fall: May 1, 2004; Nap Ghost

maybe the wife is fat/getting fat and the money part is the husband's way of deflecting why he doesn't want her to buy stuff

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:13

Mirthless: Mar 27, 2011; by the sex ghost

zakharov posted:

On mobile, can't post it, but the top 2 threads right now are both about cat centered conflicts.

Oooh

Me [26 F] with my husband [37 M] of two years, he's angry that I answered I would divorce him if he gave me an ultimatum between him and my cat.

quote:

Long story short, I have a cat, I've had her since before he and I ever even met. She is my best little buddy. I love animals, especially cats, always have, always will. I work in veterinary medicine. When we got together, and he said he wasn't a cat person, I made it extremely clear I always wanted to have a cat.

My cat is great. She is a model cat. Seriously. She never scratches anything except her scratch post. She never has accidents. She is healthy. I brush her twice a week and trim her nails once a week. I scoop her box every day. She literally does nothing wrong except for walk around being a cat I guess.

When he moved in with me, he made a list of what he was worried about living with a cat. I met all his demands: she no longer sleeps in bed with me (us now). She is not allowed on the "nice" couch. She is indoor only but I keep her up on her flea medication. I keep her litter box spotless. The cost of keeping her all comes out of my individual "fun money" portion of our finances. I no longer even kiss her, because he thought it was gross, and he insists I always wash my hands after petting her before I touch him. Note he is not allergic to the cat in any way.

Tonight, he got irritated because she was meowing at a bird or a bug or something outside the window. He was agitated already from work, and said, "I want to get rid of the cat." I said I would never be able to get rid of her. He then turned to me, and demanded to know, "If it were get rid of the cat or divorce, what would you choose?" And I honestly said if that was the case, I would probably have to divorce him.

He is insanely upset now. I understand that was probably hurtful to hear, but in my opinion, play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Also, it's not like I got the cat after we got together and he didn't know what he was getting into. It's also not like she's a bad cat in any way, or that I haven't compromised a great deal on her already. Additionally, I think he is being unreasonable and selfish, because the distress it would cause me to get rid of my cat would honestly make me resent him to the point of ruining our relationship anyway. I simply could not give up such a big part of myself and my life for him without feeling resentful. And the final reason I think he's being unreasonable is because there has been a number of times he has told me (without me asking, mind you) that if I asked him to give up or change x/y/z minor thing (much more minor than a beloved pet) about himself, he would break up with me for trying to change or control him.

Am I being unreasonable? He is very hurt, and while I understand to an extent, I don't think it's crazy to say at a certain point, "This is who I am and I can't change that for you." I hate hurting his feelings, but I don't know what to say without sounding condescending or further digging myself into a hole. And at the end of the day, I won't get rid of my cat for him. I would leave if he asked that of me, not least because it would mean certain things about him and our relationship that I could no longer justify staying. Help reddit, how do I navigate this one?

tl;dr: Husband [37 M] is not a cat person. He demanded to know if I [26 F] would choose him or my cat. I said the cat, and now I'm in big trouble. Help.

Me [26F] with my boyfriend [29M] of two years - he suddenly announced he hates my cat and wants him gone - I'm considering going with the cat

quote:

Hey there, using a throwaway because boyfriend knows my reddit username. Sorry if this is all over the place but I'm very upset.

I have been together with my boyfriend for 2 years and we moved in together 6 months ago. He is the love of my life, or I thought so, and I gave up so much to be with him here. I've had my cat for 5 years, not to sound like a crazy cat lady but I'm not close to my family and I only have maybe 2 friends who don't live in close proximity, so my cat is my "family", or has been at least my stable point in those years I had him. He knew we were a package and while we were not exactly pressured to move in together (despite being long distance), he asked me to move in with him. Boyfriend met my cat beforehand multiple times and he seemed to love him, and I must say, I have never seen my cat connect with any person like he did with my boyfriend. He used to cuddle me but since my boyfriend is nearby all the time, he completely ditched me! As far as I was concerned, it was a perfect match and I couldn't have been happier with how well the two most important people in my life got along. My boyfriend loved him so much that at some point he tried to convince me to get a second kitten as his own so my cat has company, but in the end we decided against it for multiple reasons.
Our flat is not too big and divided into rooms in a very poor way, which means we have no real way of closing the cat out of the bedroom. This hasn't been a problem until a couple days ago. My cat ate something he shouldn't have and has had an upset stomach since, so he has been complaining more than usual (but otherwise he sleeps about 20 hours a day so I wouldn't say he is a bother... either way a visit to the vet is due today). I'm a light sleeper so I wake up probably twice a night to the cat just walking around but my boyfriend never did until the cat became restless a few days ago.

He has never had a pet of his own before but he is a big animal lover. Unfortunately in light of our latest talk I realised that he is one of those people who love other people's animals/kids because he only has to deal with them for a limited time but otherwise absolutely hate the responsibility and the ugly parts that come with actually owning one. In retrospect I witnessed this about a year ago when we looked after his sister's dog for about 3 months. He claims he is a dog person (this was one of his defenses for why he hates my cat??) but after a week or two he was annoyed with the dog too even though it's a very good doggo.

So yesterday he sat me down and told me out of the blue, without much explanation that he hates my cat because he is annoying, stinky and he doesn't feel safe around him or leaving him in the flat. I think this is a bunch of bullshit and related to my cat being unwell and needing more attention in the past few days, because otherwise he is very low maintenance. But to address his new-found concerns:

annoying: he will do "cat" things for maybe 30 minutes a day. Running around before pooping, meowing for attention and food, etc. He's also worried that the meowing and running around bothers our neighbours and they will report us to the building management.

stinky: I do my best to keep his litter and the area clean, unfortunately the past week I didn't sweep in the kitchen every time he went to the toilet. I'm working two jobs and was just exhausted this past week. I always tried to do anything related to the cat on my own and not expecting help from him because even at the start I knew that essentially this is my pet I need to take care of. So he complained that there was some fine litter on the floor and how he now has to walk around knee deep in cat piss.

not safe: my cat has NEVER bit, scratched or attacked my boyfriend in any form. He will nibble me if I ignore him too long and he needs something but nothing vicious. He admitted that he has no reason to feel unsafe but he does because it's a cat.

the flat: technically my cat shouldn't be in this flat so this is a valid point. We got the blessing of the girl who normally lives in the flat and her mother who rents the flat to us, but the flat is owned by her husband. He wrote the lease and it very clearly says "no pets allowed", although we were advised to just bring him in anyway. But I do realise this leaves us no legal standpoint if it comes to defending having the cat in the flat. Unfortunately we didn't really have a choice at that time other than moving the cat in. He also complains because my cat lightly scratched the sofa before I taught him not to. It's barely noticeable but I already offered to replace it when we move out, should it be a problem.

So yeah. He told me he hates the cat and wishes he was gone. He also told me he won't throw out either of us and won't ask me to get rid of him, but he wants nothing to do with him from now on (he couldn't explain what he had to do so far apart from my cat wanting to sit in his lap every morning, something he refused to let him do in the past days). Honestly, I don't want to keep the cat somewhere where I know someone hates him, and not because I think my boyfriend would treat him badly. This incident was very eye-opening for me, because now I also think I can't stay with someone I won't be able to have more pets with. My options are either moving my cat to my ex (who very much loves him, we got the cat together) but I know I'd be heartbroken without him, I already am. Or I just break up with my boyfriend over this and move out with my cat after I figure out where we should go next. But I have no idea, I feel like it would be crazy to leave an otherwise good relationship over "just a cat", but my heart is breaking if I think about having to give him and possible future pets up.

To get ahead of an obvious suggestion: I moved here to be with him from another country and the flat market here is CRAZY, so I can't really just move out and find a flat on my own around here. We have been looking for a flat for the better part of those two years before we got this one, and on my own, as a foreigner, with a cat, I stand no chance.

tl;dr: My cat became sick and restless and my boyfriend announced out of the blue that he always hated him and wants him gone. He doesn't want to kick out either of us but I'm considering leaving with the cat.

Demon Of The Fall posted:

maybe the wife is fat/getting fat and the money part is the husband's way of deflecting why he doesn't want her to buy stuff

Explain why he won't buy her strawberries, a junky snack so healthy even diabetics can eat them by the fistfull

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:14

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

My [30M] wife [31F] of 3 years hurt me physically during sex, I'm worried, to get out of "after sex cleanup" [NSFW]

quote:

Backstory

My wife and I have been together for 7 years. Dated for four, married three. Our relationship has been pretty strong for the most part. She was sick during the second year we were dating and it was a hard time for the both of us but we stuck it out and I feel we grew closer because of it.

Our sex life has been great up until the start of this year. We've both gained weight since we were married (about fifty pounds each) and we weren't the thinnest people when we got married, either. But despite that we both went into the marriage and started our relationship agreeing that sex would be a very important part of it. We both had just ended sexless relationships when we began dating, so a passionate sex life was important to the both of us.

But I'm not writing this to talk about our lack of sex, necessarily. While it's something we've both talked about and are working on improving our sex life, I don't blame her for her low libido. She's on anti-anxiety, hormone and thyroid medication, coupled with being overweight I understand perfectly why she's going through what she's going through, and I'm trying to be as supportive as possible.

None the less, we've had sex maybe once a month in the past nine months, and it's starting to get to me. I would like to note, that one of her chief complaints concerning intimacy is the "cleanup" afterwards. She often uses it as an excuse to not want to be intimate, or will complain during the process of getting out of bed, having to go to the bathroom and wash up. This will be relevant later.

The day of and the arrangement

We've been renovating all week so we've both been exhausted at night. You can imagine how neither of us would be up for intimacy. Well, last night in bed Jane was complaining that her feet and back were bothering her. I knew where this was going, whenever she complains about a sore back or achy feet in bed she's about to ask for a massage.

I'm usually giving her 3-4 20-30 minute massages every week. This is typical and has persisted throughout our relationship. I don't really expect anything in return (I used to hope for some kind of reciprocation, or that it would lead to further intimacy, but anything of the sort has become less and less frequent) but last night I was in a bit of a mood.

So I headed off her plea for a massage by suggesting that I give her a back massage, and afterward I would rub her feet. But, I would only do that if while rubbing her feet she give me a handjob. She was a little concerned about the logistics (we made it work) but the prospect of a back massage AND a foot massage was too tempting. She accepted my offer and we began.

I broke out the oil and gave her a solid 30 minute back massage (okay it was only 25 minutes[I timed it] but goddamnit, still). I was exhausted, my hands were already in pain after painting and hammering and everything, but then I laid down next to her and we started the footrub/handjob portion of the deal.

I swear I rubbed her feet for another 20-30 minutes. I didn't time it this time but it felt just as long as the massage. She was very attentive to me as well. Finally I couldn't take it anymore and asked her to make me cum. This is where the argument started.

The argument and the beginning of the end

She didn't want to, she said, because that would be the end of her foot massage. I argued that I'd been massaging her for nearly an hour, I was tired and wanted to go to bed. It was at this point she said okay and withdrew her hand from pleasing me. By this she obviously meant that she's rather not finish me at all if her footrub wasn't going to continue. I was at a loss.

I told her to wait a minute and said that I'd continue rubbing her feet while she finished me. She argued that she didn't have a "big finish" to her massage like I would enjoy, so she didn't want to make me cum. I was at a loss for words, at first.
I offered to finger or perform cunnilingus on her so she could experience an orgasm as well. She denied that, and said seemed to resign herself to finishing me.

I asked if there was anything else she'd like me to do, and she said no, just keep rubbing her feet.

I continued to rub her feet but she seemed distracted in her dealings with me. She began to pick at a bug bite on my leg, pull on my hair, etc. This bothered me because it caused me pain and was not arousing. I stopped rubbing her feet and she told me to not stop. I said that wasn't the deal, she was supposed to give me a handjob in exchange for the footrub.

She seemed resigned to her task again and began playing with my scrotum (something she had been doing before) and I resumed rubbing her feet.

But then the kicker happened. She took my scrotum between her index finger and thumb and squeezed, causing that all too familiar pain.

That was that. The moment was ruined. The arguing, the picking at my legs and finally the injury to my scrotum killed the mood for me and I was done.

The rest of the night and today

She was happy as a clam and fell right asleep. I sat up for a bit just stewing and reflecting on what had just happened. It occurred to me that she may have just not wanted to get out of bed, and was trying to find a way to get out of it.

We've never even remotely discussed scrotum pain as a form of sexual gratification on either of our parts, and I had to coach her when we first got together about "ball play" concerning gentleness and preventing unwanted, painful interruptions to intimacy. Just trying to head off anyone who might say "she was just trying something to see if you liked it" - no, she knows that injury to the scrotum is a bad thing.

The more I thought about it, the more upset I got. I couldn't sleep next to her knowing she'd rather hurt me in one of the most intimate ways possible than get out of bed and wash off her hand. Hell, I could have brought her a warm, wet cloth if she had just said she didn't want to clean up. I was so mad, I was up for hours afterward and ended up sleeping on the couch.

Now I don't know for sure that she did it on purpose, but it just seemed so deliberate. So methodical that I can't see how it was an accident. The timing as well, right after I had said I was ready to be done. It just seems... like too much of a coincidence.

As I was getting out of bed she woke up and asked if I was coming back to bed. I told her no, I was going out to the living room to stay up for a while.

She paused, seeing that I was gathering pillows and a blanket, then asked if I was mad at her. I told her I was upset. Then she said something that gave me pause.

"You know I didn't hurt you on purpose, right?"

I froze. I hadn't said ANYTHING about her hurting me on purpose. Sure, she could have gathered that that was what I was thinking, but to just come right out and have that be the first thing she said... I don't know. It just struck me as, again, too much of a coincidence.

I told her I never said that, and left.

This morning she brought it up again and reiterated that she hadn't hurt me on purpose, and didn't understand why I was upset with her.

I don't know what to do or think. I am so upset just thinking that she would do that to me, that she would hurt me like that. I don't know, am I overreacting? Am I reading too much into this?

tl;dr My wife pinched my scrotum ending our sexual encounter last night (due to the pain) and I'm worried she did it because she was too tired and figured she could get out of having to clean up the "mess".

redditors who divide their fuckin' posts into chapters deserve to get their nuts crushed imo but still wow

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:15

Demon Of The Fall: May 1, 2004; Nap Ghost

Mirthless posted:

Explain why he won't buy her strawberries, a junky snack so healthy even diabetics can eat them by the fistfull

he has to be consistent or it will give up the overall gameplan of keeping his wife from eating

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:15

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

That fat wife whining about cleanup sounds as bad as the fat guy timing his massages.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:21

Mirthless: Mar 27, 2011; by the sex ghost

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

My [30M] wife [31F] of 3 years hurt me physically during sex, I'm worried, to get out of "after sex cleanup" [NSFW]

redditors who divide their fuckin' posts into chapters deserve to get their nuts crushed imo but still wow

He's right, she did it on purpose, lol

This bedroom is very dead and I feel bad for them both. It sounds like medication ruined her libido, he resents her for it and she resents him for wanting sex. They need to do something about this because I'm pretty sure "deliberately hurting my partner's genitals to get out of sex" is not a paradigm for their relationship that is going to last very long

Leon Einstein posted:

That fat wife whining about cleanup sounds as bad as the fat guy timing his massages.

my wife has a chronic pain problem that necessitates regular massages, as someone who spends an hour a day or more on this sort of thing you just kind of figure out how much time it takes for your hands and arms to start to ache

An hour long foot massage is a hell of a foot massage

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:23

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Im on nut crushed dudes side here but dude dont write like a jackass

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:25

Ouhei: Oct 23, 2008; Cat Army

Mirthless posted:

Oooh

Me [26 F] with my husband [37 M] of two years, he's angry that I answered I would divorce him if he gave me an ultimatum between him and my cat.

Me [26F] with my boyfriend [29M] of two years - he suddenly announced he hates my cat and wants him gone - I'm considering going with the cat

Both of these guys blow and both women should prioritize their cats over them.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:28

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# ? May 14, 2024 11:21

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

Barudak posted:

Im on nut crushed dudes side here but dude dont write like a jackass

Yea that post could have been one paragraph, way too much background and pointless details.

# ? Jan 25, 2017 17:28

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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