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Lunchmeat Larry posted:your mum's anus is so insatiably hungry for monster cock, average-sized men call it the Judging Eye Your mum's so filthy, Cnaiur thought he was loving a hole in the ground.
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Jan 25, 2017 15:16
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your mum’s holes are so nasty, her favourite dildo was repurposed as a terrifying weapon, the Heron Spear
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Jan 25, 2017 16:19
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Your mum's so ugly that Eliazarous only hosed her because of his cataracts.
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Jan 25, 2017 17:13
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I was pacing the halls of Atrithau contemplating the knowledge of pure meaning when my senses were assaulted by a hideous Mark. Whirling I saw a velour-robed Schoolman. Impossible! As I summoned my wards the man said, "Yo momma made a pit of her womb so deep they call her Mom-Uirokas." Desperately I focused on the simple truth of the geometric point. But the sorcerer's chapped lips chuckled "Yo momma so stupid she thinks skin-spy can cover up her herpes" and I was confronted with the knowledge that my disgrace was anticipated in ancient counsels where men's honor was bound to the grace of their mothers. My world pitched as the nimil-chained wizard cried "Aurang left yo momma's house so ashamed and hosed up he ran up to me saying, 'who am I? what do you see??'" And I wept as I accepted the busting of my soul.
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Jan 25, 2017 17:45
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Strom Cuzewon posted:Your mum's so ugly that Eliazarous only hosed her because of his cataracts.
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Jan 25, 2017 17:57
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Deep within the halls of Ishual I oversaw the birth of the latest Candidate. From the scents and issues of the pregnancy I had determined the sex of the boy. But when the child slid from the whale-mother it was at a time unanticipated by the evidence, and beneath the natal filth he wore a robe of thick cloth. Improbably, the child spoke. "Look here," he burbled, "buncha nerds so cloistered they think a clitoris is a property of the soul's will to become self-moving. Hey! You! You spend twenty years studying how passions move peeled-up faces?" And I saw in his bloodied face the words 'and yo cock so little they call you the Death of Girth.' I fell into the Probability Trance to explore the causal origins of this event, but everywhere I turned I saw a man with nimil-jeweled teeth hooting "They say an Anasurimbor will come at the end of the world, so I guess the Second Apocalypse goes down after three pumps". And I felt the Absolute escape me forever.
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Jan 25, 2017 17:59
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...drat
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Jan 25, 2017 18:02
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Lunchmeat Larry posted:rumour has it that the most fearless Mandate scholars face one final Dream of Seswatha that none have ever experienced without succumbing to madness and clawing out their own eyes in their sleep; the very night you were conceived You should rename your dick The Absolute because you're always trying to grasp it. Also Mom-Uroikos 
Strom Cuzewon fucked around with this message at 18:23 on Jan 25, 2017 |
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Jan 25, 2017 18:20
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Cardiac posted:I too am upset that a fantasy series doesn't reflect real life. Everything reflects real life. In this case, Bakker's whack brain.
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Jan 25, 2017 21:50
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yuh mamma so fat she a breaker of horses
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Jan 26, 2017 00:24
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General Battuta posted:I was pacing the halls of Atrithau contemplating the knowledge of pure meaning when my senses were assaulted by a hideous Mark. Whirling I saw a velour-robed Schoolman. Impossible! As I summoned my wards the man said, "Yo momma made a pit of her womb so deep they call her Mom-Uirokas." Desperately I focused on the simple truth of the geometric point. But the sorcerer's chapped lips chuckled "Yo momma so stupid she thinks skin-spy can cover up her herpes" and I was confronted with the knowledge that my disgrace was anticipated in ancient counsels where men's honor was bound to the grace of their mothers. My world pitched as the nimil-chained wizard cried "Aurang left yo momma's house so ashamed and hosed up he ran up to me saying, 'who am I? what do you see??'" And I wept as I accepted the busting of my soul. General Battuta posted:Deep within the halls of Ishual I oversaw the birth of the latest Candidate. From the scents and issues of the pregnancy I had determined the sex of the boy. But when the child slid from the whale-mother it was at a time unanticipated by the evidence, and beneath the natal filth he wore a robe of thick cloth. Improbably, the child spoke. "Look here," he burbled, "buncha nerds so cloistered they think a clitoris is a property of the soul's will to become self-moving. Hey! You! You spend twenty years studying how passions move peeled-up faces?" And I saw in his bloodied face the words 'and yo cock so little they call you the Death of Girth.' I fell into the Probability Trance to explore the causal origins of this event, but everywhere I turned I saw a man with nimil-jeweled teeth hooting "They say an Anasurimbor will come at the end of the world, so I guess the Second Apocalypse goes down after three pumps". And I felt the Absolute escape me forever. Can you please ghostwrite the rest of Bakker's books like this
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Jan 26, 2017 04:12
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Your momma so ugly even Swirling Death would not Go Down on her. She so repulsive Sranc prefer to just cuddle.
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Jan 26, 2017 23:32
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r. scott bakker posted:It’s been a mad couple of months, but the final draft of The Unholy Consult is out the door. Now I can only wring my hands while pretending to crack my knuckles… My seventeen year old self stands agog.
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Mar 13, 2017 17:26
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holy poo poo I forgot this thread existed. I've been sick this week and reskimming the books. I started quoting every funny post I read, but it just got ridiculous. I'll just say thanks for chance to laugh at something while lying in bed slowly dying from the flu. Strom Cuzewon posted:He was very persuasive. edit: Just came across an extreme example.. in WLW ithrates, kelmomas, maithenet are having their big discussion and its like "I see your true meaning when you say that [CSI explaination mode] "But we are all dunyain so we can all see inside eachother [plot explaination mode] It's like - why don't you fuckers all shut up then and just stare at each others face to talk to each other. Why are you explaining all your moves like a comic book villain? But yeah, I get that the author has to do that to keep it interesting and engaging. Modest Mouse cover band posted:So I finished book one of this, and man I had trouble getting into it. I really had to push myself forward and it took me a few weeks to finish (where I could usually burn through something like this in a night or a weekend). Is book 2 better? I kept waiting for like a climax in the book, and I'm still not sure if there was one. Maybe the Consult reveal? I had a really hard time at first. honestly, I only got through the first book because 1) I skim read a lot and 2) I was basically locked up with books 1 and 2 and nothing to do. The Vosgian Beast posted:Jason Alexander as Achamian Libluini posted:but also in the end destroyed those stupid Nonmen-fuckers after said giant removed the gag from her mouth so she could use sorcery.[/spoiler] She still has the anagogic necklace on though, right? Is she just ultra-rad and can power through it, or is she basically gonna get one spell off and be hosed ( like aka when captured ). Libluini posted:poo poo like this and Sorweel masturbating to Serwa and Moenghus Jr. loving is in all his books. Nevvy Z posted:It just seemed to come up so randomly. I love how brutally graphic every description is though. "it smelled of roast lamb and feces" or whatever, and was just like... nope. nope. nope. He does a good ( disgusting ) job of reminding us just how bad people's hygiene is, especially during aka/esmets grand tour in 2nd book. I feel like its a constant reminder of "drat these guy's balls must smell horrible". savinhill posted:Just got past the part where Saubon and his crew climb up on that redoubt or whatever it was and go down fighting an endless swarm of Sranc, so fuckin metal that scene was, wish it could be memorialized in a Frazzetta painting yeah that is heavy metal as gently caress. the other one for me is Cnaiur's speech before that final fight with Conphas' army. Strom Cuzewon posted:The white luck warrior can see himself in the future and the past, which is why he moves with that Unnerving Grace - he sees himself do something, and then he does it. The white luck warrior is described as a sister to the lead yatwer priestess Pnafaurmi or w/e. I took that to mean WLW was sent by Yatwer. But the WLW is then later described as working for some death cult god, and then later as being sent by the 4 horned god? Or is is that -WLW is yatwer's dude -Common legend says the death cult that Esmi talked to sends a perfect assassin, but its really just WLW. -Kelmomas thinks WLW is from Ajokli, but is wrong Strom Cuzewon posted:The outside is some combination afterlife and spirit realm - it's where souls and gods reside. It exists in some way outside of time, which is how prophecy is able to exist and how WLW can do his thing. One of the major mysteries is how exactly the outside relates to the inside - whether gods cause humans or humans cause god. It seems to me that all of reality is one living entity ( for lack of a better term ). The different parts are fragmented and war against each other, but ultimately everything in Earwa is the same point/entity. This comes both from Kel's explanation to Aka, as well Kel's looking through all the campfire scene with Proyas. I'm sure there are other examples as well - I think someone else pointed out stuff the nonmen said. Strom Cuzewon posted:The zero/infinite thing is a weird spin on omniscience and the "can god make a rock so heavy he can't lift it?" because if the God is infinite and all knowing, then he's unable to be surprised, unable to experience the panoply of human emotions that depend on not knowing. More disturbing, if the god sees all then, like the WLW, it has no will, he does what he will do (oh hello Muad'Dib, didn't see you there). Seems to me this is all about "first mover" arguments. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unmoved_mover It is worth noting that Aristotle talks here about it being "indivisible". Effectively, god is everywhere, and therefor nowhere. I think this meshes with -the logos, which is all about being the first mover ( the absolute ) -noGod ( everything therefore nothing ) -everything being a single point -constant references to fragmentation For a while I personally believed that we are all just nerves endings for a greater being. ( which gives purpose to human suffering, among other things ). Viewing the world through the POV of a nerve, you never can understand what the whole body sees. Death is the experience of the sum of your life being sent back to the main entity to be processed. Which jives with concepts such as souls rising, silver thread, and life after death ( where you have no worry, no fear, part of god, etc ). In earwa This concept of people as nerves also ties in with the way experiences are literally consumed and harvested by the ciphrang. poo poo I forgot what Kellus says about Heaven and God, but when talking about Prophets job is not to bring information from the god, but to gather it for him. Maybe heaven/hell is a mind/body split. Some experiences are just consumed for the raw tactile experience, whereas some experiences are greater than that and judged to be "thoughts" so they go to heaven. edit: Aristotle breaks substace into 1) "the sensible, which is subdivided into the perishable, which belongs to physics" [ This is what Hell consumes ] "and the eternal, which belongs to "another science."" [ This is what Heaven consumes] So basically demons are gods are the same - just feeding on different substance. For some reason being consumed by the gods is better ( or at least people believe it is ) The Inchori want to burn out the final nerves and starve the demons or something. Basically make the entity numb and unaware of their presence. i dunno like a cancer inside the main being. poo poo that is why they are constantly loving everything too. Cancer/virus injecting their DNA into all the other cells. poo poo aren't they even described as cancerous early in the books? The nonmen are burned out cells/synapses - old and worn out and only the most powerful experiences can get through. the Cancer has also rendered them unable to reproduce.. Oh wait, and the inchori have already been through the rest of the body killing off all the other nerves right? But there was this last little patch they missed. Ok, so God is some dude on life support. I know I'm rambling, it is the fever. of the flavor. The no-god is basically the entity waking up, or gaining too much consciousness in earwa. Which probably is short for earwax, and this is all just some hoos down in hoosville dr. suess poo poo I don't know. Strom Cuzewon posted:The WLW goes catatonic because Kellhus has somehow found a way to break free of prophecy, to exist outside his visions. WLW can't kill him, because he can only see the false future where he's killed him. Ditto the no-god, because he (may) destroy the outside by murdering the world the gods can't see him - if you're infinite, you can't conceive your end. That bugged me a bit because making time flexible like that just seems to introduce unnecessary weirdness. But maybe its more just that Yatwer has imperfect understanding, right? Blind to the no-god? Not that we have like splitting timelines and poo poo. kcroy fucked around with this message at 05:35 on Mar 17, 2017 |
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Mar 16, 2017 19:34
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^^^ Yeah, I do remember that the 100 gods are blind to the NoGod. I like your humans as nerves/parts of a body analogy and reading your post made me realize that I can't remember certain stuff from the Great Ordeal, so I'm gonna have to reread that very soon, or, more likely, listen to the audiobook. Maybe I'll just do another relisten to the whole series, be a little closer that way to understanding all of this before the finale comes out.
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Mar 16, 2017 20:32
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General Battuta posted:I was pacing the halls of Atrithau contemplating the knowledge of pure meaning when my senses were assaulted by a hideous Mark. Whirling I saw a velour-robed Schoolman. Impossible! As I summoned my wards the man said, "Yo momma made a pit of her womb so deep they call her Mom-Uirokas." Desperately I focused on the simple truth of the geometric point. But the sorcerer's chapped lips chuckled "Yo momma so stupid she thinks skin-spy can cover up her herpes" and I was confronted with the knowledge that my disgrace was anticipated in ancient counsels where men's honor was bound to the grace of their mothers. My world pitched as the nimil-chained wizard cried "Aurang left yo momma's house so ashamed and hosed up he ran up to me saying, 'who am I? what do you see??'" And I wept as I accepted the busting of my soul. This poo poo is golden. Kuiperdolin posted:The No-God appears in a whirlwind and Bakker does this thing where the POV obliquely describes an Inchoroi technological device he does not understand (like the elevator in Golgoterrath or the Heron Spear which is apparently not a spear but some kind of beam weapon). Lunchmeat Larry posted:it's a really big rape helicopter. The Inchoroi have those. or this. of course they have rape-copters. This is now my soundtrack for when the no-god wakes and is cruising around in his rape copter. The fact that its by the Revolting Cocks just makes it extra theme appropriate. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pk5du6e2q5E semi-cranky no-god waking up and just wants everyone to STFU I wanna tremble your earbballs open your trembling earballs were gonna make it all work out Were gonna have a moment of silence now world ends. Poldarn posted:I'm pretty sure Kelhus has calculated things so the last human soldier spears the last sranc in the chest just outside the gates of Golgotterath so Kelhus can hate-gently caress Aurang or something. I hope we get to see someone finally kick kellhus right in the nuts savinhill posted:^^^ Yeah, I do remember that the 100 gods are blind to the NoGod. I like your humans as nerves/parts of a body analogy and reading your post made me realize that I can't remember certain stuff from the Great Ordeal, so I'm gonna have to reread that very soon, or, more likely, listen to the audiobook. Maybe I'll just do another relisten to the whole series, be a little closer that way to understanding all of this before the finale comes out. Thanks. let me know if anything sticks out that might reinforce my theory ( or go against it ). How are the audio books? I was trying to find the early descriptions of aurax / aurang...  So much black seed...
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Mar 17, 2017 05:25
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I won't lie, Bakkers cosmology and metaphysics definitely made a lot more sense when I re-read the series not long after having done an absolutely ludicrous amount of mushrooms.
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Mar 17, 2017 05:45
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R Scott Bakker & The Prince of Nothing: Instead of crimson the dead are smeared black with... seed
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Mar 17, 2017 05:52
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Kuiperdolin posted:The No-God appears in a whirlwind and Bakker does this thing where the POV obliquely describes an Inchoroi technological device he does not understand (like the elevator in Golgoterrath or the Heron Spear which is apparently not a spear but some kind of beam weapon). Personally I am like 90% joking when I talk about the No-God being a helicopter, but I totally didn't realize about the goddamn elevator 
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Mar 19, 2017 04:26
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Someone post the elevator, I don't remember that
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Mar 19, 2017 04:28
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quote:He fell to his right elbow, so sudden was the vertigo. They floated, he realized. The ancient amputees had been arrayed across a platform of some kind—one rendered of the same unearthly metal as the Ark. Soggomant, foul and impenetrable. He saw golden reliefs through the scuffs in the offal beneath him, warring figures, leering and inhuman.
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Mar 20, 2017 02:02
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Did he have a stroke while writing that or did I have one while reading it
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Mar 20, 2017 02:35
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Never realized the Shield of Sil is a stylized vagina before.
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Mar 20, 2017 02:53
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Lunchmeat Larry posted:Did he have a stroke while writing that or did I have one while reading it It's Akka have a magic induced nightmare about a guy being tortured by by a gestalt conciousness inhabiting a dozen torsos hooked up to alien life support, he's definitely aiming for that fever-dream aesthetic. He overshoots it by quite a margin.
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Mar 20, 2017 23:49
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Number Ten Cocks posted:Never realized the Shield of Sil is a stylized vagina before. I picture it like this, but maybe with some dual helix DNA thing going on..  I can maybe do a uterus, but how do you get a vagina? ms paint ples. For some reason I always think of Trogdor... S's and Consummate V's... http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail58.html
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Mar 21, 2017 00:35
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I have to say, the audiobooks have some real charm. The first trilogy was fantastically narrated. The second set of books aren't quite as great, but they have their own flavor that's grown on me. Hearing Sarl shout "The slog of slogs!" over and over cracks me up each time.
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Mar 21, 2017 18:18
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Yeah the first trilogy especially has a fantastic narrator. The voices he gives each character are spot on, Cnaiur may be the highlight for me. Does a great job of parsing all the jumbled fantasy Middle Eastern names into something a lot more comprehensible too. Second series guy is somewhat inconsistent with pronounciatoons (Kelmomas' name gets pronounced about three different ways) but improves as it goes imo.
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Mar 21, 2017 22:24
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GreyjoyBastard posted:Still TGO spoilers:I rather wonder if mass sacrifice by way of Inchoroi nuke was a necessary step in Kellhus becoming untethered from prophecy like the No-God. Twice now we've had it all-but-stated that the process of activating the original No-God involved the destruction of the souls of human prisoners - and as a bonus, we know this through the Mandate, which means the knowledge is floating around outside the Consult. Interesting - I hadn't thought about that. It seems like the dead they are using in those vignettes are trapped between life and hell somehow, right? It seems like Saubon is trapped that way when he dies from the nuke.
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Mar 24, 2017 22:16
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kcroy posted:Interesting - I hadn't thought about that. It seems like the dead they are using in those vignettes are trapped between life and hell somehow, right? It seems like Saubon is trapped that way when he dies from the nuke. To throw a spanner in the works: Saubon flashes back the Plains of Mengedda. During the battle he sees his own corpse, and when he dies he sees it from his corpse's perspective. I dont have the books to hand, but i think its the exact same scene. "the soul that encounters him goes no further" which implies the No God has him. Im half convinces the Consult are trying to build their own afterlife, so Saubon is probably in for an unpleasant eternity.
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Mar 24, 2017 22:53
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Strom Cuzewon posted:To throw a spanner in the works: Saubon flashes back the Plains of Mengedda. During the battle he sees his own corpse, and when he dies he sees it from his corpse's perspective. I dont have the books to hand, but i think its the exact same scene. Yeah that was what I was referring to - thanks for reminding me about those deaths going directly towards the No God. Interesting to think about them creating their own afterlife.
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Mar 30, 2017 02:43
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General Battuta posted:Deep within the halls of Ishual I oversaw the birth of the latest Candidate. From the scents and issues of the pregnancy I had determined the sex of the boy. But when the child slid from the whale-mother it was at a time unanticipated by the evidence, and beneath the natal filth he wore a robe of thick cloth. Improbably, the child spoke. "Look here," he burbled, "buncha nerds so cloistered they think a clitoris is a property of the soul's will to become self-moving. Hey! You! You spend twenty years studying how passions move peeled-up faces?" And I saw in his bloodied face the words 'and yo cock so little they call you the Death of Girth.' I fell into the Probability Trance to explore the causal origins of this event, but everywhere I turned I saw a man with nimil-jeweled teeth hooting "They say an Anasurimbor will come at the end of the world, so I guess the Second Apocalypse goes down after three pumps". And I felt the Absolute escape me forever. This is pretty amazing.
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Apr 2, 2017 17:15
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So I just finished the first trilogy and felt a little underwhelmed by the confrontation with Moenghus. The motivations of the consult have sort of been revealed and Kellhus claims Moenghus would inevitably eventually share them. But I'm not clear on how they know damnation is inevitable for them. And also for all sorcerers apparently? But then oughtn't the Cishaurum be ok since theirs doesn't leave the Mark? That stuff is all pretty unclear to me.
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Apr 6, 2017 19:57
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Fuzzy Mammal posted:So I just finished the first trilogy and felt a little underwhelmed by the confrontation with Moenghus. The motivations of the consult have sort of been revealed and Kellhus claims Moenghus would inevitably eventually share them. But I'm not clear on how they know damnation is inevitable for them. And also for all sorcerers apparently? But then oughtn't the Cishaurum be ok since theirs doesn't leave the Mark? The second trilogy introduces someone with an ability who can see damnation. It's not clear how much sorcery is necessary to drat someone regardless of any other deeds they might perform, but there's no doubt that those who take it up as a career are doomed. The Cishaurim are also damned. The crime is altering creation through sorcery. Their blindness just lest them make the new reality more perfectly match the old reality on a human perceptible level, so that the Few who are able to see the underlying reality can't spot the change made. But the change and crime still happened.
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Apr 6, 2017 20:08
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^^^^ I love the discussion of prophets vs sorcerers that I think Esme has. One speaks his words, the other sings with his voice. Which perfectly leaves room for the Cishaurim and Kellhus (if he isn't a fraud) to escape damnation. Fuzzy Mammal posted:So I just finished the first trilogy and felt a little underwhelmed by the confrontation with Moenghus. The motivations of the consult have sort of been revealed and Kellhus claims Moenghus would inevitably eventually share them. But I'm not clear on how they know damnation is inevitable for them. And also for all sorcerers apparently? But then oughtn't the Cishaurum be ok since theirs doesn't leave the Mark? The certainty of damnation for the Consult does kind of come out of nowhere - I dont think I could tell you how Kellhus manages to figure it out, or how he deduces the workings of the Cishaurim. There's the short story The False Sun that purports to flesh it out a bit, but it doesn't tell you anything more than Kellhus does: Consult know they're damned, think murdering the world will avoid it. As to the rest - it's supposed to be unclear. The Tusk teaches that sorcerers are damned, and the hideousness of the mark supports that. The Kianine don't believe that the Cishaurim are damned (the prophet Fane was the first Cishaurim, and they have all the semi-religious stuff about Water-Bearers), but there's nothing to suggest that they're right. The second tetrology deals a lot more with damnation, and sort of answers some of your questions (and raises more questions to your answers). Hopefully The Unholy Consult will make everything clear, or else the Malazan thread will make fun of me (again) Strom Cuzewon fucked around with this message at 20:16 on Apr 6, 2017 |
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Apr 6, 2017 20:10
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Strom Cuzewon posted:^^^^ I love the discussion of prophets vs sorcerers that I think Esme has. One speaks his words, the other sings with his voice. Which perfectly leaves room for the Cishaurim and Kellhus (if he isn't a fraud) to escape damnation. Doesn't he read it from the face/actions/etc when Aurang (?) takes over esmenet in TWP? going off memory, but something like Aurang: "we are a race of lovers" Kullus: (sadly/knowingly ) And for that you are damned
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Apr 7, 2017 23:43
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I just finished the first trilogy and am enjoying the story, but goddamn if reading this poo poo doesn't make my grasp of vocabulary feel woefully inadequate. I've never had to look up more words when reading a series as I have for this. I also feel like I'm not smart enough to grasp all the concepts and stuff going on but I will keep going!
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Apr 9, 2017 05:10
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I liked Idiocracy
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May 1, 2017 03:36
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I gently caress Sranc
Amuys fucked around with this message at 19:53 on May 1, 2017 |
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May 1, 2017 19:50
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R. Scott Bakker posted:Shaeönanra stood blinking, cursing. “How?” he cried, holding an arm out to the hoary majesty of Aurang. “How can you fools not see how small this makes us?”
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May 1, 2017 19:53
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ARCs of the unholy consult have been sent out. Here is one review of the next book: http://thewertzone.blogspot.co.uk/2017/05/the-unholy-consult-by-r-scott-bakker.htmlquote:The novel will be published on 6 July 2017 in the UK and on 11 July in the USA. kcroy fucked around with this message at 10:50 on May 11, 2017 |
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May 11, 2017 10:46
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