ArbitraryC posted:

Getting laid a couple times a year when you're single is actually perfectly average, this dude's only problem is he buys into the idea of a different fling every week when only a tiny amount of people live that kind of lifestyle.

Pick posted:

How do I [27/M] fix the friendship [27/F] after anti-feminist rant?[new]

by PossibleNeckbeard

"Feminism is cancer. They just keep telling me that she thinks I'm a sad sack of poo poo. I hate how feminists have an agenda against nerds."

she's very liberal, as am I, but I hope I didn't come across that I hated women or something. I don't hate women, I just sometimes feel persecuted by new feminists because I'm a nerd/beta.

Pick posted:

How do I [27/M] fix the friendship [27/F] after anti-feminist rant?[new]
submitted 31 minutes ago by PossibleNeckbeard

So I have this online friend since 2008, but as of recent were talking more often and she is giving me advice on how to possibly rekindle friendship / pursue a romantic relationship with an old friend / girl I like.

I've also been trying to get advice on reddit too. She is telling me to casually try talking to her, while the Internet is telling me to delete her number and never reach out again.

This morning, I got mad at the bad advice and I sent her (not the girl I like, but my online friend); "Feminism is cancer. They just keep telling me that she thinks I'm a sad sack of poo poo. I hate how feminists have an agenda against nerds."
I later apologized for the rant and said that I hope everything is cool. It's been a few hours and no response. I know she's very liberal, as am I, but I hope I didn't come across that I hated women or something. I don't hate women, I just sometimes feel persecuted by new feminists because I'm a nerd/beta.

She is a good friend, and she gives good advice and has been there, I hope she doesn't think I'm a misogynist.

TL;DR Went on an anti-feminist rant, later apologized, she still hasn't reached back out.

quote:

My boyfriend and I have been dating for more than 2 years now, and last weekend, we talked about when we expect to be engaged or married, etc.

He doesn't believe in marriage as a political construct. He's one of those "I-love-you-you-love-me-why-is-the-government-getting-involved" kind of people. He believes in the premise of, if we want to be together forever, we will be without a "contract". However, because I want to be married and refuse to live with anyone until after marriage, he is excited to do so and want to marry me as soon as possible.
Nevertheless, I am concerned that we are marrying for the wrong reasons.

Personally, I want to get married because I want to spend more time with him, wake up to his face everyday and be able to be physically intimate with him. I love him and can see a beautiful future together, given our communication and commitment remain the same.

Our relationship is great - we are on the same page on A LOT OF THINGS (where we see our future, dealbreakers, etc), we get along really well (and can sit for hours in the same room doing our own thing. The sex is mindblowing, and he feels the same way.

Between the two of us, I definitely bring more "issues". I am insecure & jealous. I have anxiety and depressive states. I am doing all that I can for my issues.

He has misophonia, can sometimes be impatient with me and he has the tendency to prioritize video games over, say, a picnic pre-planned with my friends. It's not that he doesn't go - his unhappiness just tends to be palpable in those cases. But he is funny, loving, affectionate, mostly patient, intelligent, a good listener and very understanding.

I'm not really sure what my question is tbh. I do want to marry him (I'm actually thinking of just eloping so we can skip the wedding and start our lives together) but I also question whether we're doing it for the right reasons.

Tl;dr Bf & I are talking about marriage and I'm unsure if we're doing it for the right reasons.

54 40 or gently caress posted:

Gonna have to take him behind the shed.

Lol I love the fact he mentioned he's a liberal

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

I (F/26) am not sure my boyfriend (M/31) and I will marry for the right reasons.

Pick posted:

How do I [27/M] fix the friendship [27/F] after anti-feminist rant?[new]
submitted 31 minutes ago by PossibleNeckbeard

So I have this online friend since 2008, but as of recent were talking more often and she is giving me advice on how to possibly rekindle friendship / pursue a romantic relationship with an old friend / girl I like.

I've also been trying to get advice on reddit too. She is telling me to casually try talking to her, while the Internet is telling me to delete her number and never reach out again.

This morning, I got mad at the bad advice and I sent her (not the girl I like, but my online friend); "Feminism is cancer. They just keep telling me that she thinks I'm a sad sack of poo poo. I hate how feminists have an agenda against nerds."
I later apologized for the rant and said that I hope everything is cool. It's been a few hours and no response. I know she's very liberal, as am I, but I hope I didn't come across that I hated women or something. I don't hate women, I just sometimes feel persecuted by new feminists because I'm a nerd/beta.

She is a good friend, and she gives good advice and has been there, I hope she doesn't think I'm a misogynist.

TL;DR Went on an anti-feminist rant, later apologized, she still hasn't reached back out.

chumbler posted:

I thought being a beta nerd was invisibility, not persecution.

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

I (F/26) am not sure my boyfriend (M/31) and I will marry for the right reasons.

Pick posted:

did you ever fill that opening in lybia?

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

I hope not one single woman (or man) on our entire planet dates this misogynistic clown or touches his dick for the remainder of his sad life.

Pick posted:

How do I [27/M] fix the friendship [27/F] after anti-feminist rant?[new]
submitted 31 minutes ago by PossibleNeckbeard

I don't hate women, I just sometimes feel persecuted by new feminists because I'm a nerd/beta.

subhuman filth posted:

I think it would be good if he found someone who loves him and who he loves back

Fullhouse posted:

there's a pretty good reason people move in together before getting married and I bet these two will figure out what that is very quickly!!

Grevling posted:

Wizard story: why don't the parents try talking to the OP before they immediately assume wand=penis and involve the cps? They could have come over and asked about the wand and wizard stuff and OP and her son could have just showed them. Now they've created a shitstorm and no matter how it turns out, everyone involved will always have this hanging over them.

quote:

2. How can we help her be more relieved when I actually -do- masturbate. (this is obviously not a priority for me. I cut down from a minimum of 2 times a day up to several before I met her. But I'm human and have urges that come from a not so perfect background)

subhuman filth posted:

Study abroad is pretty retarded

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

I hope not one single woman (or man) on our entire planet dates this misogynistic clown or touches his dick for the remainder of his sad life.

Play posted:

This is dumb. I was a foreign exchange student in high school and it completely changed my life for the better. I also changed jobs a few months ago and now work for a high school foreign exchange company. Foreign exchange is fantastic for creating well-rounded and thoughtful people and everyone should do it; if they did we'd probably have less underdeveloped manchildren lurking about everywhere (including r/relationships)

subhuman filth posted:

You spent a lot of your parents money to have sex with people you cant communicate with

subhuman filth posted:

You spent a lot of your parents money to have sex with people you cant communicate with

Pick posted:

How do I [27/M] fix the friendship [27/F] after anti-feminist rant?[new]
submitted 31 minutes ago by PossibleNeckbeard

So I have this online friend since 2008, but as of recent were talking more often and she is giving me advice on how to possibly rekindle friendship / pursue a romantic relationship with an old friend / girl I like.

I've also been trying to get advice on reddit too. She is telling me to casually try talking to her, while the Internet is telling me to delete her number and never reach out again.

This morning, I got mad at the bad advice and I sent her (not the girl I like, but my online friend); "Feminism is cancer. They just keep telling me that she thinks I'm a sad sack of poo poo. I hate how feminists have an agenda against nerds."
I later apologized for the rant and said that I hope everything is cool. It's been a few hours and no response. I know she's very liberal, as am I, but I hope I didn't come across that I hated women or something. I don't hate women, I just sometimes feel persecuted by new feminists because I'm a nerd/beta.

She is a good friend, and she gives good advice and has been there, I hope she doesn't think I'm a misogynist.

TL;DR Went on an anti-feminist rant, later apologized, she still hasn't reached back out.

subhuman filth posted:

You spent a lot of your parents money to have sex with people you cant communicate with

ArbitraryC posted:

That booty don't need explaining.

Grevling posted:

She's okay with pre-marital sex but not okay with living with him until they're married? Sbluh?

Play posted:

it's also possible to have sex.

Pick posted:

How do I [27/M] fix the friendship [27/F] after anti-feminist rant?[new]
submitted 31 minutes ago by PossibleNeckbeard

So I have this online friend since 2008, but as of recent were talking more often and she is giving me advice on how to possibly rekindle friendship / pursue a romantic relationship with an old friend / girl I like.

I've also been trying to get advice on reddit too. She is telling me to casually try talking to her, while the Internet is telling me to delete her number and never reach out again.

This morning, I got mad at the bad advice and I sent her (not the girl I like, but my online friend); "Feminism is cancer. They just keep telling me that she thinks I'm a sad sack of poo poo. I hate how feminists have an agenda against nerds."
I later apologized for the rant and said that I hope everything is cool. It's been a few hours and no response. I know she's very liberal, as am I, but I hope I didn't come across that I hated women or something. I don't hate women, I just sometimes feel persecuted by new feminists because I'm a nerd/beta.

She is a good friend, and she gives good advice and has been there, I hope she doesn't think I'm a misogynist.

TL;DR Went on an anti-feminist rant, later apologized, she still hasn't reached back out.

Lonely Virgil posted:

I thought betas were the ally cucks of feminism, if I'm remembering my internet social theories right.

quote:

My exGF/fiance and I are both Australians from a highly conservative Indian background. This is important because neither of us had any previous relationships/sexual partners until we met each other at university. She was studying pharmacy and I was in med school - we had the same basic science lectures where we met. Our relationship for the next 5 years was fantastic. We were each others firsts. We never argued. I put in 110% effort into being romantic, taking her out to all sorts of soppy things. We were that overly cutesy couple that would make you vomit with how well we were together. Our parents initially hated us dating but soon came round. We had a plan - 2016 was her final year in pharm school - we would get engaged after she would graduate and then marry at the end of 2017 when I finish med school.

However, early in 2016 something changed. My GF started talking about open relationships. She had been hanging out with friends who had introduced her to this concept. Her other friends talked about all the sexual + relationship experiences they had and how theyd grown from that and she wanted us to do the same. She was apparently happy with our sex life - we had sex every goddam day and I always aimed to please her. However, she said we could learn so much from this open relationship malarkey. I called shenanigans on it. I tried to read her blogs and websites on this crap but frankly I think the concept is disgusting. I am 100% happy to spend my whole life with exGF why the heck would I want to rub genitals with some other person? Makes no sense.

She was still adamant about the whole thing and it all spewed into a fight last February when she said she wasnt ready to get married. She knew I was the one for her and that we would end up married together and spend the rest of our lives together but she didnt want to waste her chance growing as a person - and she didnt want me controlling her growth/being abusive. She wanted to open the relationship up for a year and then close it when we married. I told her I wasnt in the business of being abusive so I opened it up fully by leaving.

It was the hardest thing I had ever done. I was depressed and broken for the next 3 months. My grades suffered. I lost a poo poo tonne of weight as I couldnt eat anymore (which ended up being a good thing for me but not a healthy way of doing it). I had to apply for special consideration for my exams and had to do a CBT course to help me through. My parents were really concerned at one point and almost wanted me committed to an involuntary mental health treatment plan. What really broke me as I heard from mutual friends that she went on a tinder date 3 weeks after I broke up. During those initial 3 weeks she just messaged me a couple times to apologies and pick up her things from my apartment and thats it. After having spent 5 years trying to please this woman I felt like I was useless trash.

Luckily I pulled through it all. I stupidly saw one of those sappy motivational quotes on FB which attributed a quote about physical fitness to socrates. I got into running and then bodyweight/gymantic routines/jailhouse workouts. Since June last year things have improved greatly. I am in the best constitution of my life. I have visible muscles now. I can run 25k, do all sorts of pullups/pushups/handstands. I am just getting into weight lifting. My fitness helped improve my medschool marks. I have been saving my money for once. For the first time in my life I have caught girls eyeing me out. I havent gone on a date yet but I have declined 2 from other girls/friends of friends as I didnt feel ready yet.

Last December was my exGFs graduation. She started talking to me on FB about it and invited me to it. I tried to keep the whole talk cordial/polite and in very safe territories (ie how was school/her family/work next year) because I didnt want to show her how weak she made me feel. She invited me over to coffees/dinners which I also declined. She tried to apologies about her behaviour and 'come clean' to me about her relationships in the past year but I told her I didnt want to hear it. Since then she has been trying to get me one on one to talk. She has been sending me all sorts of gifts - a watch for Christmas, cooked food whenever etc. Over the past 5 years all our friends have become mutual friends. After the split we tended to avoid going to the same gatherings and our friends helped with that. Recently though she has been going out of her way to get close to me. At an Australia day BBQ recently she made a public apology to me and asked for me to give her another chance. She said she was naive for not realising what she was losing. She was confused by the pressure of commitment and her time apart has fortified how much of a pillar I was in her life and how wrong she was. She knew 100% in her heart she wanted to be my wife. I was mortified by the whole thing and asked her to leave me alone.

Since that event my mutual friends have been split down the middle. A lot of them think we should get back together and have been encouraging me to give her another chance. Apparently she has been crying nonstop about that day. Apparently she delayed starting her new pharmacy job because of the stress of it all. Some of my friends remain silent and think I should do whatever is best for myself. Only 1 has said he thinks I shouldnt get back with her ever. This friend was my room-mate during my depressed months so he saw how much I suffered.

Now I am very much in the camp of just moving on. I am in my peak physical condition and mental health. When we were together I put in so much effort in our relationship. I would barely sleep more than 4-5 hours a night balancing study, work and trying to please her by doing all sorts of things - like cooking her a meal or going out. If putting 110% effort wasnt enough to convince her to stick with me and not go around loving random dicks on tinder then what the heck will she do when I am mid 40s and have a heart attack trying to keep my effort up. However I have a tendency to be stubborn in my ways. I wanted to ask you guys if I am making the right choice by declining her and if so how should I act with my friends?

tl;dr: ExGF broke up because she wanted an open relationship - now she wants me back and my friends thing we should get back together - I am not so sure.

EDIT 1: Hearing the comments here reaffirms what I wanted to do. I am definitely not taking her back again. She decided what she wanted and called me abusive for not kowtowing to her system. Im not interested in risking that sort of situation again. She can go get herself a more open minded guy if she wants this open relationships stuff. If any of my friends keep pushing for us to reconcile I will ask them to go date her if they are so concerned. I will be pruning those friends that arent willing to see my point of view. All of them know the circumstances around our breakup so it should be obvious to them why I would not want to take her back ever again. The good thing is even if I did get stupid and go against my instincts and take her back my mah and sister would literally kill me. My sister threatened to punch exgfs lights out when we first broke up and scared the hell out of my exgfs mum when she asked about us getting back together at another indian couple's wedding last November. I was doing some self reflection after I typed out this post - trying to figure out exactly why I rejected those 2 offers for dates. I still think of myself as worthless despite all my recent improvements. She really did a number on me. I think I will take up the offer to go on a hike with my friend's friend/coworker. I think by getting on with another girl I may learn to value myself a bit more. Even if things dont work out, at least I will be more prepared for the next time I find someone valuable.

EDIT 2: here is the FB meme that made me change my lifestyle. 1. Its pretty badass. I did most of the work unintentionally by being super depressed and not eating anything. I do not recommend this diet at all. A much better diet would involve low carbs and interval fasting. Once I started doing the basic routines at the bodyweightfitness wiki I could see my strength develop/progress. I highly recommend it to anyone. It took 6 months for me to shed 15kg and go from BMI~29 to BMI 25. When your body isnt a misshapen pear, its easy to get into fashion and taking care of yourself.

EDIT 3: Removed the URL to the fb image of socrates. Its basically a quote saying “No man has the right to be an amateur in the matter of physical training. It is a shame for a man to grow old without seeing the beauty and strength of which his body is capable.” Its got a picture of a statue of a muscular man shackled to a chain. Its pretty cool.

Tolkien minority posted:

An e/n (er sorry /relationships) success story

Me [24M] with my exGF/fiance [23F] 5 years/split 1 year, broke up because she wanted an open relationship - now she wants me back - friends say I should take her.

MF_James posted:

Hahah this story is 100% what should happen anytime someone suggests opening the relationship, good for him.

ArbitraryC posted:

"it's abusive and controlling for you to say you're uncomfortable with me banging other people", human garbage.

quote:

Bfs [26M] foot fetish has started to make him less attractive/desirable to me [26F] Is there any way to make it better?

Originally I was fine with him being into feet. I had no problem giving him footjobs or letting him touch/lick my feet. That was fine with me.

But with time, it seems like he's needed more "hardcore" scenarios. He needs to me to workout and have sweaty feet before he licks them. He wants to watch me step on things like eggs and ground beef (Such a waste of food!!) He steals my shoes and socks so he can smell them throughout the day.

It's gotten to the point where I flinch when I see him coming near me because he's going to want to touch my feet. He'll literally grab my feet whenever I'm not standing. It's hard to explain the feeling, but imagine your spouse grabbed at your genitals 20 times a day, but you get absolutely no pleasure from it. It's just one hard grab over and over. Soon, you get afraid and nervous when you see them coming. That's how I feel. I'm always on high alert. Even when I'm sleeping he'll lick my feet.

I don't know how to approach this with him because I have entertained most of his requests, so in his mind, everything is fine. I feel bad because it's like I'm taking away the kink he was brave enough to share. I don't want to shame or embarrass him, which seems inevitable. But I can't handle having a tongue or penis on my foot any more. And I dodge kisses because who the hell wants to kiss someone that just sucked on their sweaty gym foot?! My attraction to him to nose diving. I wish his kink stopped at footjobs, but it doesn't.

Idk. Obviously I need to talk to him. But how?

Tl;dr: foot fetish has started grossing me out. How can I tell him this without hurting him?

corn on the cop posted:

corn on the cop posted:

corn on the cop posted: