/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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ThePeavstenator: Dec 18, 2012; Establish the Buns

Pvt.Scott posted:

My personal trainer told me about the time she got kicked out of Planet fitness. They told her to leave because she was "intimidating" the other clients with her presence.

E: and grunting too loud. She doesn't make a lot of noise, really.

planet fitness horror stories are like the poe's law fat-acceptance tumblr posts except real

it would be more funny and less sad if they weren't also one of the largest and most affordable gym franchises in the US

# ? Feb 25, 2017 00:01

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# ? May 14, 2024 00:22

MF_James: May 8, 2008; I CANNOT HANDLE BEING CALLED OUT ON MY DUMBASS OPINIONS ABOUT ANTI-VIRUS AND SECURITY. I REALLY LIKE TO THINK THAT I KNOW THINGS HERE

INSTEAD I AM GOING TO WHINE ABOUT IT IN OTHER THREADS SO MY OPINION CAN FEEL VALIDATED IN AN ECHO CHAMBER I LIKE

ThePeavstenator posted:

planet fitness horror stories are like the poe's law fat-acceptance tumblr posts except real

it would be more funny and less sad if they weren't also one of the largest and most affordable gym franchises in the US

You get a 2-person membership for $20, if you're just looking to maintain weight/lose some weight, it's not a bad gym, but if you're looking to LIFT BRO, it's not the gym for you.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 00:06

ThePeavstenator: Dec 18, 2012; Establish the Buns

MF_James posted:

You get a 2-person membership for $20, if you're just looking to maintain weight/lose some weight, it's not a bad gym, but if you're looking to LIFT BRO, it's not the gym for you.

the gym bro caricature is real but they're usually not the ripped guys and are much rarer than most people think

a vast majority of people (especially the really fit/ripped people) show up to the gym with headphones in, do their workout, and then leave

# ? Feb 25, 2017 00:22

Psycho Society: Oct 21, 2010

You don't need to be an acolyte of broses (bro Moses) to know Planet Fitness is lame and bad for anyone who's not a spin class going tai chi instructor

# ? Feb 25, 2017 00:33

I Was The Fury: Oct 19, 2012; Always stop to smell the flowers, just in case they're weeds

Psycho Society posted:

You don't need to be an acolyte of broses (bro Moses) to know Planet Fitness is lame and bad for anyone who's not a spin class going tai chi instructor

I dunno it was pretty nice to only pay $10/mo when my workout regimen consisted of "cardio then some weight on the machine things to stay in shape"

I wouldn't have gone there if my goal was to make zick gaince or whatever, and ill agree with you in that i don't think it's only geared towards people who make fitness into a major component of their life.

E: oh I misread. I mean I disagree with you. I do not think PF is only good for people who make fitness a major component of their life.

I Was The Fury fucked around with this message at 00:59 on Feb 25, 2017

# ? Feb 25, 2017 00:54

Psycho Society: Oct 21, 2010

I'll be honest I'd probably go there if they had one in my town, as gently caress going to a gym that charges ~60 a month.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:05

MF_James: May 8, 2008; I CANNOT HANDLE BEING CALLED OUT ON MY DUMBASS OPINIONS ABOUT ANTI-VIRUS AND SECURITY. I REALLY LIKE TO THINK THAT I KNOW THINGS HERE

INSTEAD I AM GOING TO WHINE ABOUT IT IN OTHER THREADS SO MY OPINION CAN FEEL VALIDATED IN AN ECHO CHAMBER I LIKE

ThePeavstenator posted:

the gym bro caricature is real but they're usually not the ripped guys and are much rarer than most people think

a vast majority of people (especially the really fit/ripped people) show up to the gym with headphones in, do their workout, and then leave

Oh I know, I have been to 10 or so different gyms in the last 8 years or so, just saying, if you REALLY want to lift, you do not planet fitness, but if you're more casual then you can.

I wish GOOD gyms were only like 30-40 a month, most gyms here that have a decent selection and are large enough to accommodate people are around 80-120 a month. Nice thing is my work pays for half of the membership.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:07

Nazzadan: Jun 22, 2016

What the hell is going on between me [29M] and my friend [30F]?

quote:

Let me just preface this by saying I can't read women's signals. Even if I do pick up on them, I always second guess myself. Sorry for the wall of text.
So I met my friend maybe 5 years ago. She was dating a guy, and I started seeing a friend of hers a few months after that. We always got along great, and although there were a few times I found myself attracted to her I never gave it much thought because we were both in relationships with other people.
Fast forward a few years, she's engaged and my relationship with my girlfriend ends. I was dumped and I took it pretty hard. Self destructed a bit and became pretty reclusive. I quit going out, spent a lot of time alone, etc.
It's been about a year since my ex left me and during this time I had little contact with my friend other than the occasional Facebook comment. After the first few months, I was a little hurt because it seemed my friend had sort of "chosen" my ex over me. I knew they had hung out a bit, and I thought at some point she would at least check in with me since I had been dumped and all, but it never happened. After a while, I sort of wrote off the friendship. It's also worth noting that during this year I had heard her relationship with her boyfriend/fiance may have ended, and this would later be confirmed.
So about two weeks ago, I get invited to her birthday party via Facebook. I wanted to go but was on the fence since I didn't want to see my ex. The day of the party my friend texts me and asks if I'm going to be there. I explain the ex situation, and she says she doesn't know if my ex will be there and she really hopes I come. I tell her I might. I have a friend recon the party and my ex isn't there so I decide to head on over.
My friend is real happy to see me (and I her) and she comes over and gives me a big hug. The odd part was instead of resting her head flat against my chest like most people do when they hug (keep in my mind I am quite tall and she is fairly short) she is looking directly up at me almost like she wanted a kiss, but I dunno. Probably just an excited hug.
A little later at the party, she grabs me by the arm and takes me outside for some privacy. Wants to know what I've been up to, where I've been hiding, and asks why I never called her. I point out that she never called me either. She says she really missed me and hugs me again. We're interrupted by a couple people coming outside, who pick up that they may have been interrupting us and my friend makes a joke about how we we're going to make-out and she was gonna blow me and then immediately reassures the other people and me that she was just kidding. I thought it was obvious she was kidding and didn't think anything of it, but found it odd that she need to make sure everyone knew she was kidding.
Later into the party, a bunch of us go swimming and we're talking like friends and this is were I get the real news that her relationship was over and she tells me she was kinda seeing some other guy, but wasn't so sure about it him because "he told me he had always been in love with me". I give her the 'yeesh' face and she just kind silently agrees. She leaves the pool, and I swim with friends for the rest of the party and don't see her until she is about to leave. We say our goodbyes, she gives me a hug and a kiss on the cheek says she loves me. I tell her I love her too and say we should hang out again soon. She agrees. Now as far as I remember we have never told each other we love each other (as friends) and she's never kissed me on the cheek, but keep in mind this is the first time I've been around her without her being in a relationship. Maybe she's just like that when single? We text a bit through the rest of the night because, she was worried about one of her roommates that hadn't been home yet (she ended up being ok). For the first couple days after the party I start thinking she may be into me, but I dismiss it because A) I haven't seen her for a year and she's sort of seeing someone B) she's still good friends with my ex which is often complicated territory and C) I have a tendency to fall for any girl that laughs at my jokes and shows me attention like she did.
Two weeks go by with no contact. She went out of town for a week and I didn't even know she had gotten back, but she called me up last night and invited me and some of our other friends over to hang out and drink with her and her roommate (Me, her, her roommate [26F], and our friends both [29M]).
We are just hanging out, everyone's having a good time and everyone gets kind of drunk. She has been kind of touching me on the arm occasionally through night, which I notice but kind of dismiss as drunkenness. Then she asks us guys if and who we are loving anyone and it kinda goes into the awkward conversation where we all explain that all of us guys aren't getting any. She talks about how we're all young and should be having as much safe sex as we can while we can. We all agree, but point out that it takes two to tango and it's easier for cute girls to just get some than it is for nerdy dudes.
The night continues, and she eventually brings up a game of 'Truth or Dare'. The guys kind of groan at the prospect and reluctantly agree. We play for a little while, but it mostly just turns into everyone getting dared to make out with each other. All the dudes have had a short make out with both girls by the end, and one guy even got to feel my friend's breasts. At one point she gives me another long intimate hug, that frankly I didn't know how to respond to since were all hanging in the kitchen at this point. It was a little awkward since everyone else was standing around and I just held her until she broke away. A kind of immature night, but fun.
At this point it's about 4:30 am. My friend expresses that she is tired and kind of wanders off to bed. Us guys chat with the roommate for a bit, and then make our way to the door. As I'm about to leave my friend comes out grabs me by the arm and tell's me to come watch Bob's Burgers with her for a bit. I agree and think I'm going to get some action. So we're just laying in her bed side-by-side laughing at the show and chatting a bit, and I suppose I should have just jumped her bones right then and there but I didn't (I'm an idiot). I kind of figured she would make some move to be honest since she grabbed me and pulled me back there but maybe she figured she lead the horse to water... So we watch an episode or two, and both start to drift off. She rolls on her side facing away from me (dammit) to get comfy. So I sort of spoon up to her and throw my arm over her with my hand on her stomach. Zero reaction. She doesn't lean into me, say anything, or even make a noise. But she doesn't react negatively either and she isn't asleep because she mentions the episode being over or something like that at one point. After a bit I move my hand to her leg. Zilch. I resign to myself that it's not gonna happen and we drift off.
We wake up a few hours later. Things don't seem weird. She gets ready for work while I just lay in bed. She's says I can stay if I want, but I decide to head to my own bed. We walk out chatting like usual she gives me a quick hug and tells me she's gonna try and go swimming after work and invites me.
So what the hell is going on between me and my friend? Is she into me? Was she looking for just a one night hook-up? Did I blow it? Is she trying to parlay a FWB situation? Should I just call her and ask her direct or see where things go? Why am I an idiot that didn't make better moves?
tl;dr: Friends for years. See each other for the first time in a year, both single for the first time since we've known each other. I pick up some signs, maybe. She literally invites me into her bed one night but gives nothing back when I snuggle on her. What gives?

I loving hate this dude

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:10

Play: Apr 25, 2006; Strong stroll for a mangy stray

Nazzadan posted:

What the hell is going on between me [29M] and my friend [30F]?

I loving hate this dude

Yeah jesus christ just go in for a kiss and if she kisses you back then you're good to go. If she doesn't, which seems pretty unlikely after all of those massive signals, then just apologize and say you misread the situation and that you just like her a lot and thought there might be something there. Nothing to lose, everything to gain

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:16

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

Nazzadan posted:

What the hell is going on between me [29M] and my friend [30F]?

I loving hate this dude

I can't google this one, please post the link, I need to see the comments.

I NEED TO SEE THEM!

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:18

Psycho Society: Oct 21, 2010

Nazzadan posted:

What the hell is going on between me [29M] and my friend [30F]?

I loving hate this dude

Someone cut off this guy's balls and give them to someone who can use them, because he sure as hell isn't going to

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:18

Nazzadan: Jun 22, 2016

WampaLord posted:

I can't google this one, please post the link, I need to see the comments.

I NEED TO SEE THEM!

https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/2asyty/what_the_hell_is_going_on_between_me_29m_and_my/

Here ya go

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:25

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

That's not quite as bad as the dude listening to "his crush" masturbate in their shared tent and then, the next morning, hearing her ask "did you hear anything last night"?

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:28

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

Nazzadan posted:

https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/2asyty/what_the_hell_is_going_on_between_me_29m_and_my/

Here ya go

Ah dammit, there's only 10. I was hoping for tons just calling this guy a clueless idiot.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:28

Gumbel2Gumbel: Apr 28, 2010

I generally need to be hit over the head with a box of condoms to notice when a girl is flirting with me, but she is standing on his lawn with a sign protesting the fact he is not loving her

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:29

Cough Drop The Beat: Jan 22, 2012; by Lowtax

Nazzadan posted:

What the hell is going on between me [29M] and my friend [30F]?

I loving hate this dude

I want to stab this moron in his goddamn face over the internet. Jesus loving Christ. How dense can one person be? Just kiss her, feel her up, give her an intimate massage, anything rather than sitting there like an idiot robot. I almost feel bad for the girl because she did literally everything short of forcing him down right there. :smugjones:

Reminds me of a really old post with the most pathetic story about a camping trip where dude's female friend was repeatedly masturbating in the tent right next to him and he's all like "I dunno, do you think she's into me guys?"

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:35

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

To be fair, after a point the girl should just go "Hey, I like you, want to make out?"

E: VVV I'm just trying to help her in this weird hypothetical.

WampaLord fucked around with this message at 01:44 on Feb 25, 2017

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:42

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

WampaLord posted:

To be fair, after a point the girl should just go "Hey, I like you, want to make out?"

Yeah this is the actual solution and clearly what the guy needs.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:43

Cough Drop The Beat: Jan 22, 2012; by Lowtax

WampaLord posted:

To be fair, after a point the girl should just go "Hey, I like you, want to make out?"

Plenty of women and men alike enjoy being romanced and aren't really into asking "Wanna j-j-jam it in?"

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:48

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Oy vey! It's like my first failed encounter in high school (posted in the last thread?) but somehow more dense and painful.

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

Plenty of women and men alike enjoy being romanced and aren't really into asking "Wanna j-j-jam it in?"

More often this has to do with fear of rejection or embarrassment. Nobody wants to fire the first shot.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:48

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

Plenty of women and men alike enjoy being romanced and aren't really into asking "Wanna j-j-jam it in?"

Sure but after a point a reasonable person has to realize this dude is not picking up what she's putting down and either give up or escalate.

He is entirely in the wrong, but if she wants that dick enough, she has to drop all subtlety.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 01:50

lazorexplosion: Mar 19, 2016

This telephone company keeps sending me letters about me owing them money and stuff? And then they called me and we like 'we're going to cut your service off if you don't pay your bills'?? Did they want me to pay these bills? Help me reddit I'm bad at reading these signs.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 02:12

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

Nazzadan posted:

Yeah he's a scumbag but she really needs someone to grab her by the shoulders and yell in her face that she is being used and needs to grow a spine

How is he a scumbag? He set pretty clear lines and has stuck to them. Their relationship is never gonna be exclusive and they are both free to date around, he also established that he doesn't want to hear about her side pieces and he won't tell her about his, which is exactly what he's doing.

It's all on her to break up if it's making her miserable imo.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 02:45

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

ArbitraryC posted:

How is he a scumbag? He set pretty clear lines and has stuck to them. Their relationship is never gonna be exclusive and they are both free to date around, he also established that he doesn't want to hear about her side pieces and he won't tell her about his, which is exactly what he's doing.

It's all on her to break up if it's making her miserable imo.

He's supposed to fall in love with her, you moron!

# ? Feb 25, 2017 02:49

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

ArbitraryC posted:

How is he a scumbag? He set pretty clear lines and has stuck to them. Their relationship is never gonna be exclusive and they are both free to date around, he also established that he doesn't want to hear about her side pieces and he won't tell her about his, which is exactly what he's doing.

It's all on her to break up if it's making her miserable imo.

I don't think he's a scumbag but I would take steps to end things in that situation, it sucks but she's not going to help herself for a long time. I've been on either side of that one and it's not particularly fun for me in either case. Recognizing a partner is suffering because of the relationship but not so much that they're actually muster the activation energy required to end it is a pretty cool thing to do, IMO. I don't want to keep an arrangement with someone if I think I'm hurting them.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 02:52

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

I don't think he's a scumbag but I would take steps to end things in that situation, it sucks but she's not going to help herself for a long time. I've been on either side of that one and it's not particularly fun for me in either case. Recognizing a partner is suffering because of the relationship but not so much that they're actually muster the activation energy required to end it is a pretty cool thing to do, IMO. I don't want to keep an arrangement with someone if I think I'm hurting them.

That's fair I guess but I would say most people, particularly in the age range, do not operate the same way and she's gonna have to learn that lesson sooner or later for herself. I saw that poo poo happen a ton in college and while I felt bad for a couple of my friends that were the ones who wanted more I didn't really think the other person was doing anything inherently wrong either.

I would not personally do what he's doing because I'm not really a fan of casual relationships but it's hard to fault the guy for basically getting exactly what he wants when he was very upfront and clear about it. Breaking up with her for her is probably the most moral choice here but it certainly doesn't make him a bad person for not doing so.

ArbitraryC fucked around with this message at 02:58 on Feb 25, 2017

# ? Feb 25, 2017 02:56

Psycho Society: Oct 21, 2010

ArbitraryC posted:

How is he a scumbag? He set pretty clear lines and has stuck to them. Their relationship is never gonna be exclusive and they are both free to date around, he also established that he doesn't want to hear about her side pieces and he won't tell her about his, which is exactly what he's doing.

It's all on her to break up if it's making her miserable imo.

Yeah they were never dating exclusively and people are pretending like he's her boyfriend. He's not her boyfriend.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 02:56

Hot Stunt: Oct 2, 2009

BF's bowel issues ruining our relationship [26 M, 25 F, ~6 month relationship]

quote:

Sorry for the somewhat long post.

I have been going out with "Brad" for about six months now. I would love to say that our relationship is great but lately things are becoming strained. It involves his bowels so I don't really feel like airing this all out to my family or whatever for fear he would be made fun of.

Brad has a bowel disease which he says that he is taking medicine for. However, even with the medicine the effects of the disease are seriously hampering the relationship. For example, I don't want to let him use my bathroom because whenever he does it becomes literally unusable for a day due to the extreme smell. It sounds kind of funny on paper but when you can't even go in your own bathroom for fear of burning your eyebrows off it's not so funny. He also farts copiously when we are together and they don't exactly smell like roses either. To be fair he does make an effort to leave the area to dust the crops but sometimes he can't anticipate it (according to him). Whenever he sleeps over he also farts during the night. He can't help it but sometimes it even wakes me up because it's quite loud or due to the smell.

During sex is probably the worst part of things. He just cannot control his farts and they are also really smelly. The smell totally ruins the mood for me, particularly during blowjobs since I am so close to the epicenter. The alternative is for him to leave the room to fart but that really breaks up the pace and it's always totally transparent that that is what's happening. In fairness, he cannot help this part and it's probably due to me fixating on it more than anything. Whenever we get a "clean" sex session it's some of the best in my life and we both really enjoy it.

At first I tried to put up with it because he was just as embarrassed as I was. Now, though, things are starting to get tense. I am sort of reluctant to give bj's now for fear that I'll get an rear end-blast in the face while down there. He says that although his problems are indeed a problem he is doing all he can and can't be blamed for his disease. He lists some of the steps he has taken as buying candles for my bathroom, leaving the area to fart, and avoiding certain types of food that aggravate the issues.

I don't want to shame him for his condition but it really is impacting the relationship. Are there others who have had issues like this? We are so great together in so many other ways that I hate that the relationship is suffering over this issue. What should I do?

tl;dr: Bf's out-of-control bowels are negatively impacting the enjoyment of several parts of our relationship. What should I do?

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:02

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

Hot Stunt posted:

BF's bowel issues ruining our relationship [26 M, 25 F, ~6 month relationship]

i want to believe this is the untold story of that dude who was making his girlfriend wear a buttplug all the time

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:07

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

It wouldn't be r/relationships without mystery odors:

I (30M) need to talk to my partner (27F) about smellRelationships
submitted 12 hours ago by mushroomyakuza

quote:

So this is, uh, tricky.
My girlfriend and I have been together for 10 months. We've been, generally speaking, very happy. We are in love and planning on moving in together soon. Our sex life has its ups and downs due to several factors, one of which I'll get to right now.
Lately around my girlfriend, I've noticed this almost imperceptible smell. It's almost like a taste. It's hard to explain. If I lean in and consciously try to smell her, it's not usually there. However, sometimes when she leans close, or we finish kissing, I notice it. It's unpleasant. It's really hard for me to identify what kind of smell it is. I'm not sure if it's body odour. She's not someone who sweats a lot, so I'm struggling to attribute it to that. Something about it almost reminds me of the smell babies have - except, less pleasant. Once I thought it was her breath and I attempted to tell her this. She got very uppity and offended, sulked about it, then brushed her teeth. However, the smell was still there.
Recently I've noticed it more and more. People say smell and pheromones play big role in physical attraction. How can I go about telling my girlfriend that I keep smelling this odd aroma around her and that I find it unattractive / unpleasant? I don't want to upset or hurt her, but I can hardly imagine a way for me telling her this to not be.
I'd considered not mentioning it at all and just buying her perfume, but I'm not sure this will clear up the problem or if she'll simply not use it. Buying female deodrant would likely have the same outcomes, though I imagine she'd be more suspicious of that, particularly if I bought both.
r/relationships, I need your help. Any and all advice is much appreciated. Thanks.
TL;DR: I don't know how to tell my girlfriend her natural smell is unpleasant lately and it is making me less attracted to her.

Does this woman not wear deodorant on the reg? 'cause, uh, that's probably your problem, buddy.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:08

PleasingFungus: Oct 10, 2012; idiot asshole bitch who should fuck off

If anyone was curious, the "just discovered my wife has a dick" story from a few pages ago had an update. (it's from a few years ago):

quote:

UPDATE: thanks to everyone for your advice. I met with her today for the first time since she left and we spoke in length. She apologised, and explained her reasoning behind not telling me. She said that she knew she loved me as soon as we met and she wanted me to be the one she would marry, but she thought that I would reject her if I knew she was a man. She said she had always considered herself as a woman and didn't want her being born a man to get in the way of us being together.

I cried, she cried, but ultimately we talked it out.

In the end we both got exhausted from shouting, taking, crying, that we just embraced each other, she was very upset and distraught so I held her in my arms and comforted her.

After a few minutes she lifted her head and I turned to look at her, and at this point our eyes met. We had never been this close before, we weren't even allowed to kiss before we were married (because of our religion) and for a moment I forgot all about the problems, and before I knew what was happening we were kissing. To be honest I was so caught up in the moment with the fact that this was the first kiss I had ever had, with a woman that I loved, I didn't stop to think about anything else.

I guess you could say I got a little carried away, for a brief moment I was caught up in the passion, I still regarded her as the same person I fell in love with, I still loved her and fancied her as a woman, and she ended up performing oral sex on me.

I was very overwhelmed, this was the first time I had ever done anything sexual, I guess I wasn't really thinking straight. To be honest, I don't think I regret it.

Needless to say, I'm still very confused by all this, she left for work and I have just been sat in the garden all day trying to think this through. I do love her, very much, but I don't know if this could work.

The thing is, I do love her, very much, I can't imagine live without her. I have never met anyone that I get on with as we'll as her and I don't believe I will ever meet anyone like her again. I'm also very worried about my church and parents finding out this happened, they certainly would disown me if I decided to stay with her.

I guess for now this is all I can tell you, I still haven't made up my mind. Any input will be greatly appreciated, thanks.

TL:DR: we met to talk and she explained herself, we hugged and one thing lead to another, we kissed and more. Still confused about what to do.

They're Catholic, apparently. (Not Orthodox Jews, sorry!)

Comments seemed pretty united in denouncing the wife as a liar. I'm personally torn: I mean, she did keep some very important information from him for a year, but she never actually lied to him (as far as we know), and her reasons are... understandable.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:39

PleasingFungus: Oct 10, 2012; idiot asshole bitch who should fuck off

it seems a bit hard to believe that even extremely Catholic families would forbid kissing before marriage. like, i mean: really?

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:40

Incoherence: May 22, 2004; POYO AND TEAR

Nazzadan posted:

What the hell is going on between me [29M] and my friend [30F]?

I loving hate this dude

quote:

At this point it's about 4:30 am. My friend expresses that she is tired and kind of wanders off to bed. Us guys chat with the roommate for a bit, and then make our way to the door. As I'm about to leave my friend comes out grabs me by the arm and tell's me to come watch Bob's Burgers with her for a bit. I agree and think I'm going to get some action. So we're just laying in her bed side-by-side laughing at the show and chatting a bit, and I suppose I should have just jumped her bones right then and there but I didn't (I'm an idiot). I kind of figured she would make some move to be honest since she grabbed me and pulled me back there but maybe she figured she lead the horse to water... So we watch an episode or two, and both start to drift off. She rolls on her side facing away from me (dammit) to get comfy. So I sort of spoon up to her and throw my arm over her with my hand on her stomach. Zero reaction. She doesn't lean into me, say anything, or even make a noise. But she doesn't react negatively either and she isn't asleep because she mentions the episode being over or something like that at one point. After a bit I move my hand to her leg. Zilch. I resign to myself that it's not gonna happen and we drift off.

So he's not 100% clueless, I guess? Only about 97% clueless.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:42

Barudak: May 7, 2007

PleasingFungus posted:

it seems a bit hard to believe that even extremely Catholic families would forbid kissing before marriage. like, i mean: really?

If they live in Ohio it could happen.

But seriously itd be unheard of to have no kissing prior to marriage for a Catholic and lying about that is like the ur idea of annulment and prototypically theyd have to do pre marriage counseling through their church where "I am a man" may have come up.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:45

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

PleasingFungus posted:

it seems a bit hard to believe that even extremely Catholic families would forbid kissing before marriage. like, i mean: really?

It's not hard to believe at all.

E: Haha, guess I earned this av from arguing that PewDiePie is a racist, thanks rear end in a top hat.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:45

54 40 or fuck: Jan 4, 2012; No Yanda's allowed

I don't find it at all hard to believe. Purity Ball's are a thing and it's not exactly far fetched for religion to be madly controlling, especially over women.
That all sounds like a really difficult and upsetting situation all around. Wonder how it ultimately played out.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:45

Bubblyblubber: Nov 17, 2014

In a way, your wife springing a surprise dick on you is better than other more common surprises like cc or student or gambling debts. At least the surprise dick stops loving you for a while after it cums.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:46

Nazzadan: Jun 22, 2016

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

I don't think he's a scumbag but I would take steps to end things in that situation, it sucks but she's not going to help herself for a long time. I've been on either side of that one and it's not particularly fun for me in either case. Recognizing a partner is suffering because of the relationship but not so much that they're actually muster the activation energy required to end it is a pretty cool thing to do, IMO. I don't want to keep an arrangement with someone if I think I'm hurting them.

Yeah, this is why he's a scumbag. He actively sees her miserable that they are not together, and just continues business as usual slammin her. He lacks empathy and is super robot-y overall

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:54

Punkin Spunkin: Jan 1, 2010

Me [20 M] with my girlfriend [19 F] of almost a year. She's half-black, I'm white: How do I talk about the future when I'm not sure I want non-white children?

quote:

u/Benis_Mangler358d
I can assure you that this post will get downvoted to hell for being 'racist' or some other garbage, but I have a few legitimate questions regarding relationships that I just simply have to ask, because everybody around me is either single, alone, or hooks up using Tinder and doesn't actually confront relationship issues.

So, I met this girl. She's not the most beautiful possible choice, but she's cute and cuddly and sweet and healthy and I love her with everything I've got. She's absolutely amazing and has a personality that I consider one-of-a-kind, the type of girl who you meet and realize that despite other things, you could stay with her forever and be happy doing so. She makes me happy and helped me out of a dark place in life just simply by coming into my life when nobody else really seemed to show any interested in me. I took a chance, asked her out, and here we are almost a year later and planning to stick it out for the long term.

However, she is the first 'normal' girlfriend I've ever had. My first one was emotionally abusive and used me as nothing more than emotional support and a way to 'piss off daddy', so to speak. Within a week of going to college, she had found a 'cuddle buddy' and I broke up before allowing myself to get cucked by the latest 'shiney new thing' in her life. gently caress that.

My second girl, well, I'm pretty sure I was the other guy, she was 'technically single', but refused to put our thing on facebook, said she wasn't looking for a relationship, and then went out with another guy the day after she dumped me before finals week of freshman year first semester. So, I don't really regret that so much, at least she had a shred of decency about it.

The problem is that these two previous relationships have left me utterly incapable of actually judging how to view relationships I have. I have a very deep issue with trusting people. Having mild anxiety (diagnosed, not just some Tumblr-tier garbage) and severe depression on and off for years will do that to you. The fact is, I take a very long while to open up to people and I really have closed myself off to the wider world in some ways. I am cripplingly lonely and sometimes I feel like I'm just on a different wavelength than everybody else, even my current girlfriend.

I don't have a savior complex with her at all, I accept her for who she is and don't rely on her for any sort of happiness, because that's just unhealthy. We're extremely well balanced and get along perfectly. We've never fought, never have 'ups and downs' or any of that, it's far more a long, gentle feeling of contentment. I don't really know whether this is supposed to be how a relationship feels, because for her it's her first and she's all excited and happy. So I don't know whether I have become emotionally castrated due to depression or whether it's just a 'new vs experienced' thing.

The second major issue is that I want kids that look like me. And by that, I mean white children. I'm sure some of you will think this is awful and racist, but I can't change the fact I feel that way. It's a nagging problem in the back of mind, one I can't express to her at all, one that bothers me every time I talk about the future with her. She makes me so happy, but I am afraid of having to confront the reality that I have this subconcious preset desire that I haven't been able to change. Trust me, I can no more change the way I feel than change the fact that I am a straight man. It's just a part of me. But unfortunately it's a part of me that I cannot shake.

Does this make me a racist? Does it make me a terrible person? Sometimes I think I'm just awful and selfish, despite that this girl means the world to me and I would gladly dedicate my life to being her partner in this world. I feel like I'm unworthy, undeserving, and a terrible person for feeling the way I do about potential children of ours, as well as for not showing the same passion that she shows for our relationship.

tl;dr: I want children that look like me, but I really love a girl who doesn't. What do.

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:56

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# ? May 14, 2024 00:22

Cough Drop The Beat: Jan 22, 2012; by Lowtax

PleasingFungus posted:

it seems a bit hard to believe that even extremely Catholic families would forbid kissing before marriage. like, i mean: really?

It's very believable if they live in some tiny sheltered backwards rear end town in the Midwest or the like. Any religion could be taken to utterly ridiculous extremes in an environment like that.

I'm glad that the dude is took it somewhat positively, even if he seems terribly confused and rightfully so.

Cough Drop The Beat fucked around with this message at 04:00 on Feb 25, 2017

# ? Feb 25, 2017 03:58

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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