Barudak posted:

Im going to gloss over how goddamn stupid they are to have that as a business plan to hone in on how $22,000 isnt anywhere near enough money to buy purses that actually might appreciate in value so they werent even doing that part "right"

quote:

NSFW 33 points 78 comments submitted 9 months ago by ikikiki13 to r/relationships

My girlfriend and I have been together for a year and a half now. Our relationship isn't a super sexual relationship if we are being honest, however when it comes to special occasions my girlfriend is usually up for a good bit.

For my birthday, she actually got one of her friends that I found really attractive to give me a double blow job. And it has been probably one of the highlights of my life lol. The thing is her birthday is coming up, and well it was her turn. And she told me she wanted to do a threesome with another dude.

Now, I don't have a full problem with that, however she was like lets do it with John. And I know that John has a big dick, plus I don't want to deal with seeing John knowing that he has slept with my girlfriend. So I asked my girlfriend to get a guy off Tinder.

The problem is, that my girlfriend specifically wants a guy with a big dick. And not just oh he is an inch bigger than you , but like significantly bigger. And to me it really makes me insecure. Ideally the other guy would be my size or smaller than me, but she is really pushing to get a guy with a 8 inch dick. When I told her that I was uncomfortable with it, she brings up that I got with her hot friend, so its only fair. She said she didn't make me choose from unattractive women.

I still just really don't want to do this. I legitimately feel like if it goes down, I won't even be able to keep an erection, and I'll just end up watching them have sex while I feel like poo poo. I really don't want to do this. But my girlfriend keeps psuhing for it.

tl;dr-girlfriend and I had a threesome with two girls, now she wants to do one with two dudes

quote:

I still just really don't want to do this. I legitimately feel like if it goes down, I won't even be able to keep an erection, and I'll just end up watching them have sex while I feel like poo poo. I really don't want to do this. But my girlfriend keeps psuhing for it.

WampaLord posted:

Threesomes ruin relationships, this is known.

Bubblyblubber posted:

Searching threesomes is like shooting fish in a barrel, this is the last one.

My[26m] girlfriend[25f] wants a threesome but wants it with a guy with a big dick, I feel really uncomfortable by this. Relationships

Pick posted:

I always like these ones that feel karmic

Oh, so it's okay when you get X, but if I...

Mirthless posted:

you know who else gets stitches? people who get mangled in horrible accidents by drunk drivers. she could have been saving somebody's life.

Moridin920 posted:

turnabout is fair play

Bubblyblubber posted:

Creepo threesome stories, get them while they're hot!

I overheard my roommate [F24] and her boyfriend having an imaginary threesome with me [F/23]


I wonder if, much like open relationships, threesomes are always more trouble and drama than they're worth.

Barudak posted:

Threesomes are a thing you do when you are young, have no responsibilities, and willing to destroy a relationship to try something out. Other things in this category include becoming a professional streamer, writing a screenplay, and starting an underground dog fighting ring.

Moridin920 posted:

lol at this chain of comments:

quote:

This is my first marriage, his second. Prior to this, we were both in long term relationships involving kids that we helped raise. Nobody (I think) gets married thinking they'll eventually get divorced so I get that he invested himself into parenting his ex-wifes children. I did the same with my ex-fiance's kids so I get it. They have been divorced now almost 15 years. The children are all grown up and have their own children. He maintains a relationship with them and that's fine by me but I have a serious problem with the way he is handling things.
We had an event to go to this past Saturday that we had planned, at his request, since April. The day comes and he conveniently falls asleep before departure time. I tried to wake him twice and he carried on sleeping so I went alone. That was fine by me because it was an outdoor event and it was very hot so it was better that he skipped it if he wasn't already feeling up to it. Monday he mentioned to me that his ex-stepchild and her family were in town this week and wanted to meet up. I have made it abundantly clear that I have no interest in anything to do with her (she cyber stalks me) so I didn't dignify it with a response. I had to hold my tongue otherwise there would have been yet another fight over this person. Yesterday he asked me again about it and this time I said I'd pass but thanks for the invite. To that, he started bargaining with me. He would spend time with me doing whatever I wanted if only I went to lunch with him, this girl and her family. I again declined.
This morning, Tuesday, comes and I felt badly for declining something that was important to him so I texted and asked where lunch was going to be and what time. I'd make the sacrifice for an hour. He told me that if I wanted to go I'd have to take the rest of the day off from work and drive with him to another county to meet with them. Not meeting up during our lunch break at a nearby place or even something in the county where we live. Oh no, I would have to use vacation hours and drive 50-60 miles and for what? What role would I play there? I replied that taking time off from work and going to another county to have lunch with him and his ex-stepfamily was not appealing to me. He couldnt wake the gently caress up to attend the thing we planned on going to months in advance but managed to have this all worked out! I was furious! It was a family reunion basically and what the gently caress would I be doing there other than looking like a cuckqueen? Hell the gently caress no.
His response was that he was sorry he offended me again and asked me to forgive him. I told him that he would be offended too if I told him I'd taken the day off to go to another town to spend time with the kids of the man I used to gently caress and I had no forgiveness for him. (This topic is a dead horse. He keeps re-offending and asking for forgiveness.) Have you ever seen a dog reunite with it's original owners? He acts the same way. Happy to see me because I take care of him but over the moon for them and that poo poo sucks.
When we met, the condition I had was no pre-existing kids. I wanted to be with someone who wanted natural kids that we could have together or not have kids at all. He was told this upfront, even before the first date! I had a long-term relationship end and lost two kids I loved in the process so I didnt want to go through that again. He said he agreed. He wanted kids of his own. A friend told me that I'd have to provide him with a kid of his own but sex takes place once a month if I'm lucky so at our ages natural born kids probably wont happen. I tried to initiate a conversation about adoption and his response was "That would be nice." and it never came up again. We had a miscarriage in 2013 and his comment was "I'm sorry about your miscarriage." and something about how nature takes care of pregnancies that arent healthy. We had a court wedding and on the way to the appointment all he talked about how his first marriage failed. We could only get married on the day we chose because I did the premarital course (online) for both of us. If I hadn't done it we would have had to wait 3 days beyond the date we chose. He knew this and still couldn't be bothered.
Yes I know, I deserve to have my rear end beat with the red flags. It loving hurts me to think that this guy who said he'd wanted to build a family with me is so hung up on his ex-wife's children that he doesn't see the clock ticking. Well, he doesn't see or doesn't care. I am barreling down on 40 and he's approaching mid-50's. The women in my family have kids late - some in their mid-40's even - but I don't want to be looking into primary schools when I should be preparing for retirement. I am hurt and I am angry. I'm angry at him for what he continues to do and at myself for allowing it and for letting my child-bearing/raising years pass me by.
He's been avoiding me since I got home but I know we will eventually have to deal with each other and I don't know how to act. It's been 4 years of this nonsense and I am ready to pack a bag, take my two dogs, and leave. At least then I could find someone who could focus on us and our future. Or, I could be happily alone. I've gotten conflicting advice from two trusted friends so I'm asking ... What would Reddit do?
tl;dr Husband obsessed with ex stepfamily but been divorced over a decade. Keeps disregarding my feelings about it. Being #2 is hard. Pun intended.

quote:

"When we met, the condition I had was no pre-existing kids. I wanted to be with someone who wanted natural kids that we could have together or not have kids at all."
This is beyond bizarre. You expected him to just forget about his kids that he raised? You are upset that he planned to spend more than one hour having lunch with his kids and grandkids?
"It was a family reunion basically and what the gently caress would I be doing there"
Acting like you give a poo poo about your husband and his family that he loves. You know, instead of trying to sever their relationship and make everything all about you. Marriage is about combining families, not cutting out and replacing family members.

quote:

Me [18 F] with my autistic boyfriend [22 M] of 2 months, he posted nudes on craigslist and I'm lost.Infidelity


We were friends for a long time before he confessed he had feelings for me. He was also a genuinely sweet guy that just wanted to help me through life. He took me out to expensive dinners and purchased clothes for me. For Valentines he took me to an extremely nice place and bought a lot of gifts for me, I searched the prices online and it was a little over $400.

Currently he's teaching me how to drive, budgeting and purchasing my first car, filing the FAFSA, and paying for all my college applications. Through his networking, I've landed a job on an upscale part of town and may have an internship. He's also a vet technician and provides free checkups and medical products for my pets (flea and worm treatments for two cats and a dog). All of his generosity would cost me hundreds of dollars and would simply be impossible if he wasn't providing it for me.

My parents are going through a divorce. Things are rough and they couldn't give less than a poo poo about helping me with these milestones. I have tried talking it with them but haven't gotten anything changed or done in the past 3 years. This is the closest I've ever gotten to independence and if I let him go I'm terrified of being back at square one. Not knowing how to drive, sitting locked in my room, miserable and stuck at a lovely retail job.

Why I mentioned he's on the Asperger's spectrum: he honestly doesn't understand the consequences of his actions. He loaned his colleague $200 and he never paid him back. He ended up short on rent and had a complete panic attack. Fortunately we were able to get that resolved but it makes me wonder about his financial decisions. He is constantly trying to find the good in people and believes in helping literally every person he meets. If he sees a stranger walking at midnight he'll give him a ride. He doesn't understand how dangerous this is.

Recently my sister and I were looking to purchase a car on craigslist. She wasn't taking it seriously and started laughing at the sex? section. She was laughing at the ads while showing me the worst of them. One of the pictures she showed me was the lower half of my boyfriend. The ad was abouse giving oral, but it was coded with several acronyms along with his kik. I distinctly remember he wrote "can't host" and "IDC if u r relationship just b discreet". It had been active for 20 days, roughly half the time we've been together.

I'm so hurt and confused. Why would he go through the trouble of doing all this for me, only to turn around and cheat? He's constantly telling me how much he loves and adores me. If I tell him I just want to be friends he will not help me.

tl;dr: My boyfriend posted nude photos of himself asking to pleasure women. I rely on him for transportation and other life changing things, but I don't want to see him again.

quote:

It was a family reunion basically and what the gently caress would I be doing there other than looking like a cuckqueen? Hell the gently caress no.

Psycho Society posted:

40 days

Bubblyblubber posted:

I wonder if, much like open relationships, threesomes are always more trouble and drama than they're worth.

Psycho Society posted:

If you want to gently caress lots of people it's easy: don't be in a relationship

Bubblyblubber posted:

Oh yes, it begins as Don't Drink and Drive, then soon enough it's going to be Don't Think and Speak and before you know it it's going to be Don't Reddit and Live.

On that note:

Should I let my gf have a one-night stand?


Errbody is awful, yo

Bubblyblubber posted:

Searching threesomes is like shooting fish in a barrel, this is the last one.

My[26m] girlfriend[25f] wants a threesome but wants it with a guy with a big dick, I feel really uncomfortable by this. Relationships

Ouhei posted:

Of course they do. For all the bullshit people like to spread about how humans aren't built for monogamy, it sure as hell feels like the vast majority of people cannot handle anything outside of it.

Ouhei posted:

Of course they do. For all the bullshit people like to spread about how humans aren't built for monogamy, it sure as hell feels like the vast majority of people cannot handle anything outside of it.

Pvt.Scott posted:

Until you get past a certain value of drunk, driving while tired, having an intense conversation, texting or otherwise highly distracted/inhibited is just as dangerous. BAC is easy to measure and prove, so that's an obvious, and good, enforcement point.

Stop driving drunk. Stop driving while yawning up a storm. Stop having deep conversations about life altering decisions or angry arguments. Stop updating your Twitter or whatever. Bunch of shitlords.

quote:

Basically my only interests include drinking and gambling. I literally go to work, come home, drink, and hope to win money on horses or whatever. I don't feel like making friends, I ignore the phone when it rings, I have no opinion on anything and everything I look at makes me sick. I know people on all kinds of ends of the spectrum from crusty punks and hitchikers and then people my age that are going to university to become doctors and I can't help but think that they are all morons and that whatever their ideology is, I know better. I don't want to relate to anybody as I have no interests, and my entire view towards other people is just "get away from me"
tldr: Is there something wrong with me?

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I feel the same way :/

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dont blame you

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K.

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waiting....

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K

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am going 2 teach u a lesson

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K.

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k means

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K

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naughty boy

Mirthless posted:

severe phimosis is treated with circumcision, though

look it up my man

It's not the first thing they should be trying but it sounds like he's pretty far past the point of simple stretching exercises and hydrocortisone

Pvt.Scott posted:

Until you get past a certain value of drunk, driving while tired, having an intense conversation, texting or otherwise highly distracted/inhibited is just as dangerous. BAC is easy to measure and prove, so that's an obvious, and good, enforcement point.

Stop driving drunk. Stop driving while yawning up a storm. Stop having deep conversations about life altering decisions or angry arguments. Stop updating your Twitter or whatever. Bunch of shitlords.

quote:

Here's a few things (alot) that has perplexed me:
1) Doesn't act spontaneous, laugh wholeheartedly or do anything outside the box.
2) Never held my hand (got better with that after he read he should do that)
3) Eats very limited but strange foods (he will fry beef cubes, pour marinara sauce on it and get mad that I won't eat it)
4) Doesn't ask for outcomes info. For example if I go to the doctor for something, doesn't ask how my sons team did in their basketball tournament, how an important meeting went at work etc.
5) Is very handsome but prefers to dress bummy. Would wear a sweatshirt and sneakers to a 5 star restaurant if I let him. Likes to wear shirts with obnoxious sayings.
6) Obsessed with Superman and Marvel movies.
7) Always complaining about something physical (this hurts that hurts)
8) Walks like a duck
9) Has told me he sometimes wears two pairs of pants at one time...wtf?
10) Listens to the same music on his ipod over and over and over.
11) Misplaces things...all the time.
12) Will tap stuff on other stuff.
13) Has told me my hair looks orange or my face looks red (after I blushed)and didn't see how that could be offensive. (I am IRISH!)
14) Will take me to a very expensive restaurant and not say much of anything. (No romantic talk, saying how beautiful I am, how he's so glad to be with me etc.)
15) Refuses to make me breakfast but will take me out for breakfast.
16) Says he doesn't understand why I need to hear nice things "all the time".
17) I could tell him I have a lot on my mind and he won't ask what.
18) Is repetitive sexually. Very little passion yet acts like he enjoys it.
19) I was throwing the football with my son and went to throw it to him and he acted like I was about to throw a bomb at him! He actually ducked and shook his head no.

Pick posted:

Psycho Society posted:

8) walks like a duck

Straight White Shark posted:

9) quacks incessantly