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Poll: Who Should Be Leader of HM Most Loyal Opposition? This poll is closed. |
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| Jeremy Corbyn |
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95 | 18.63% |
| Dennis Skinner |
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53 | 10.39% |
| Angus Robertson |
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20 | 3.92% |
| Tim Farron |
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9 | 1.76% |
| Paul Ukips |
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7 | 1.37% |
| Robot Lenin |
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105 | 20.59% |
| Tony Blair |
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28 | 5.49% |
| Pissflaps |
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193 | 37.84% |
| Total: | 510 votes | ||
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Pochoclo posted:"loving immigrants are the worst scum of the earth, right, my darling immigrant wife?" I've mentioned it before, but two of the most vehemently anti-immigration people I know were born in Nigeria and Bangladesh. I suppose this is what the Right means when they talk about wanting immigrants to assimilate.
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Mar 12, 2017 15:57
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| # ? May 23, 2024 23:25 |
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FYGM philosophy transcends all nationality and creed
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Mar 12, 2017 16:00
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Seaside Loafer posted:In my personal experience of being depressed and drinking to much I found people with the best of intentions trying to talk me out of it even more annoying than the source of the depression thus doubling up the situation. You could try just shutting the gently caress up and leaving her alone to work it out but obviously I know nothing about the situation and if she is regularly threatening to top her self then its a bit more serious. She says she'll kill herself while sat crying in the living room every day. She's drunk and SUPER loud talking incessantly and laughing out loud as loudly as possible at anything everyone says. If you put something on she's loudly asking questions through it all the time constantly. It's not like we're sitting her down and saying "So about this depression thing...". It's just not possible to leave her alone to sort it out. I'd genuinely love to be able to do that at this point. And I know as well that if she goes to some professionals she just says it's fine and that she needs new medication and nothing else about what she's doing.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:05
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Look for a new apartment.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:08
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BabyFur Denny posted:Look for a new apartment. "We're moving out so now you're homeless"
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Mar 12, 2017 16:12
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Seaside Loafer posted:In my personal experience of being depressed and drinking to much I found people with the best of intentions trying to talk me out of it even more annoying than the source of the depression thus doubling up the situation. You could try just shutting the gently caress up and leaving her alone to work it out but obviously I know nothing about the situation and if she is regularly threatening to top her self then its a bit more serious. Depends on the level of depression. At its worst the person is going to feel detached and listless. There's probably some chronic pain that only comes on when the depression is at its worst. Leaving such a person to stew in their own thoughts is not a good idea. If directly referring to her depression is annoying to her then try to talk around it? Mindfullness is very important. This is being aware of your mood changes and attempting to mitigate the worst of their effects. I will say that stopping her drinking is extremely important. People with depression often try to self medicate and it always ends up worse. Be annoying if you have to, she needs to get off the booze. Easier said than done I know. There's another person with self agency involved. It always fucks up the best laid plans.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:12
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How about a brisk walk? Will lift her spirits and help shift those extra pounds.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:15
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Taear posted:She says she'll kill herself while sat crying in the living room every day. She's drunk and SUPER loud talking incessantly and laughing out loud as loudly as possible at anything everyone says. If you put something on she's loudly asking questions through it all the time constantly.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:17
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BabyFur Denny posted:Look for a new apartment. She's really not an appropriate house mate, I thought she was sitting in her own area drinking. Even with social service intervention you are going to have to deal with strangers coming in and out of your house all the time. I would call your landlord and explain the situation, if she has a legal notice of eviction then the council have to rehome her - they always have a stock of priority housing set aside for this purpose. It sounds callous written in black and white but she's not your responsibility and you should not be the ones dealing with this. When you signed your tenancy you did not sign on to be a charity or mental health worker.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:18
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Taear posted:She says she'll kill herself while sat crying in the living room every day. She's drunk and SUPER loud talking incessantly and laughing out loud as loudly as possible at anything everyone says. If you put something on she's loudly asking questions through it all the time constantly. tell her to put up or shut up
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Mar 12, 2017 16:21
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learnincurve posted:She's really not an appropriate house mate, I thought she was sitting in her own area drinking. Even with social service intervention you are going to have to deal with strangers coming in and out of your house all the time. I would call your landlord and explain the situation, if she has a legal notice of eviction then the council have to rehome her - they always have a stock of priority housing set aside for this purpose. Unfortunately this isn't an option. She's a school friend, I've known her for about 20 years now and if I did that (or was part of that) a lot of people would stop talking to me. Of course they don't really understand how horrendous it is at the moment but that's how mental health stuff is I guess. It's a frustrating dead end.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:26
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WeAreTheRomans posted:Hey Breath Ray, check out the General Exercise megathread to get a start on not being a fat bloater. Just don't post as terribly in there as you usually do here. I think it's a diet thing for me I do tonnes of exercise.. but eat tonnes of food
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Mar 12, 2017 16:27
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JFairfax posted:tell her to put up or shut up 'Put up' what?
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Mar 12, 2017 16:30
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Taear posted:Unfortunately this isn't an option. She's a school friend, I've known her for about 20 years now and if I did that (or was part of that) a lot of people would stop talking to me.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:32
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Pissflaps posted:'Put up' what? Kill here self. Just a joke I reckon. Anyway if that guys friends stop talking to him for not living with a suicidal person then they aren't really his friends imo
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Mar 12, 2017 16:33
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Breath Ray posted:Kill here self. Just a joke I reckon. Anyway if that guys friends stop talking to him for not living with a suicidal person then they aren't really his friends imo If we all moved out she'd be homeless. Four of us live in the house, not just me and her.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:39
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I think the kindest thing you can do is find a single bedroom of your own and see if you can get some perspective from there. There's actually a really good thread about experiences with the mentally ill that you might useful if you want the link
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Mar 12, 2017 16:48
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jBrereton posted:People worked abroad in Europe before Brentry. Dunno if you've noticed but immigration to all First World countries has been getting progressively harder for decades now but especially since about ~2000. We are no longer in the 70s and more to the point neither are places like France or Belgium when it comes to their outside-of-EU immigration policies.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:49
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Taear posted:She says she'll kill herself while sat crying in the living room every day. She's drunk and SUPER loud talking incessantly and laughing out loud as loudly as possible at anything everyone says. If you put something on she's loudly asking questions through it all the time constantly. Taear posted:"We're moving out so now you're homeless" Taear posted:Unfortunately this isn't an option. She's a school friend, I've known her for about 20 years now and if I did that (or was part of that) a lot of people would stop talking to me. You're making a lot of excuses for her, and in a way this probably helps enable her behaviour because you're insulating her from the consequences of her actions. As I said before you and your housemates need to have a full and frank discussion with her, offer her help to make the appointment, offer her support to the appointment, but ultimately make clear that she can't continue the way she is. If she won't engage and isn't paying rent, then she needs to go.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:50
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She has to want to change, and having some consequences may promote that.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:51
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At the least I would echo that my experience with depression is that nothing changes unless you force it. Something needs to push her into acting to remedy her situation.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:52
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It could also be the medication that is making her feel suicidal thoughts. That's a fun side effect of some depression medications. It's a tough situation, a friend of mine was bi-polar and killed herself out of the blue and it's hard on everyone involved. Especially when her mother had done the same thing, her brothers and father especially just looked broken at her funeral. At least you know there's a problem, but it must be incredibly frustrating to not get much in the way of your friend taking steps to help themself.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:56
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Namtab posted:You're making a lot of excuses for her, and in a way this probably helps enable her behaviour because you're insulating her from the consequences of her actions. As I said before you and your housemates need to have a full and frank discussion with her, offer her help to make the appointment, offer her support to the appointment, but ultimately make clear that she can't continue the way she is. If she won't engage and isn't paying rent, then she needs to go. The government pays the rent for her now. I'm not insulating her. I'm moving out anyway in October. But then that leaves my other two housemates there with her. And means she definitely CAN'T pay the rent. What then? It's a problem that any threats of that kind don't just affect her, they affect the others too.
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Mar 12, 2017 16:57
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Taear posted:The government pays the rent for her now. You are insulating her. If she wasn't your childhood friend and you felt pressure from the rest of your friends to help then she'd be out on her rear end. That's what not insulating looks like. If she's constantly drunk and crying/laughing in the same day it sounds like her alcoholism is more of an issue than her bipolar disorder, and there isn't much medication can do for that. As much as it sucks, you can't force her to change and you aren't responsible for her. If you're becoming sick of this routine, get out. You might feel like staying is the best thing to do but it's not helping you and there's no evidence its helping her.
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Mar 12, 2017 17:05
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Talk to social services. If she has a medical diagnosis, no job, no way of paying the rent, no family support then social services will step in if you refer her. Adult social services don't have the same constraints as a GP, you can't walk into your housemates doctor and tell the truth of the situation but you can with social services. http://www.nhs.uk/NHSEngland/AboutNHSservices/mental-health-services-explained/Pages/mental-health-emergencies.aspx
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Mar 12, 2017 17:12
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Taear posted:The government pays the rent for her now. Please dont ask for advice on what to do with a severely mentally ill alcoholic if you intend to just make excuses for why you won't do anything you are advised to do.
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Mar 12, 2017 17:19
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If that page is using learning difficulties when they mean learning disabilities then I'm going to be annoyed
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Mar 12, 2017 17:20
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serious gaylord posted:Please dont ask for advice on what to do with a severely mentally ill alcoholic if you intend to just make excuses for why you won't do anything you are advised to do. "Move out" isn't an option. I've said how we've already done the other stuff OTHER THAN the social services. We're already past most of the stuff like speaking to the GP and etc. I was seeing if there was another step if the hospital she was referred to doesn't have anything to help them. That was all. And the answer was "go back to the GP". Just saying "Ok we're just going to leave you to it" and she kills herself, what then? Okay great she wouldn't do what was needed to help but that's not a good enough answer when someone you know has killed themselves, you know?
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Mar 12, 2017 17:21
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goddamnedtwisto posted:I've mentioned it before, but two of the most vehemently anti-immigration people I know were born in Nigeria and Bangladesh. I suppose this is what the Right means when they talk about wanting immigrants to assimilate. Any attempt to point out that the gentlemen of the British National Party probably wouldn't see a difference between them was met with disbelief because he had his A-levels and a job and something something Commonwealth. We also had a local BNP candidate who was born in Malaysia. I have no idea how that works, maybe they wanted the repatriation grant.
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Mar 12, 2017 17:25
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Your options remain either intervening more drastically or continuing as is. Intervention will effect change, but obviously the change is unpredictable when dealing with someone in a bad way. The risk that she goes through with it or that people end up thinking you're an rear end in a top hat is simply a part of intervening. You can continue to facilitate her current state if you would prefer but that carries risks too.
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Mar 12, 2017 17:25
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The most important thing is to ring emergency services in an emergency
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Mar 12, 2017 17:27
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Taear posted:"Move out" isn't an option. I've said how we've already done the other stuff OTHER THAN the social services. We're already past most of the stuff like speaking to the GP and etc. As previously posted by people far more knowledgeable about this than I, people in situations like these only modify behaviour if there are consequences. You are currently enabling her behaviour by allowing this to continue. 'Give up the drink or you have to move out' is harsh, and yes it may drive her further into the hole shes in. It also might get her to actually speak the truth to her GP and get some proper help. Alternatively you do nothing, and 6 months from now you're sat at her funeral wondering if maybe you'd pushed a bit more she'd still be alive.
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Mar 12, 2017 17:29
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Sorry to break it to you nantab but learning difficulties is the correct term now. We know that learning difficulties go hand in hand with other disabilities such as ASD and Down's syndrome, and an official diagnosis of "[disability] plus learning disabilities" is confusing.
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Mar 12, 2017 17:29
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Namtab posted:The most important thing is to ring emergency services in an emergency Wise words.
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Mar 12, 2017 17:29
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OwlFancier posted:Your options remain either intervening more drastically or continuing as is. Intervention will effect change, but obviously the change is unpredictable when dealing with someone in a bad way. The risk that she goes through with it or that people end up thinking you're an rear end in a top hat is simply a part of intervening. You can continue to facilitate her current state if you would prefer but that carries risks too. As I said - I'm not facilitating it. I'm not doing anything at all any more. But my housemate who IS trying to "help" has come to ask what to do. He's tried to take away her vodka. He pours it away. She just buys more. Yea I know that means she's not helping herself. And what I was seeing is if there's something else, something to take this out of our hands (his hands) when there's no parents in the picture. And the answer is no. Which I get. But making her homeless isn't an option because man I WOULD be an rear end in a top hat then.
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Mar 12, 2017 17:29
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Where does she get the money for it if shes not paying rent?
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Mar 12, 2017 17:34
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learnincurve posted:Sorry to break it to you nantab but learning difficulties is the correct term now. We know that learning difficulties go hand in hand with other disabilities such as ASD and Down's syndrome, and an official diagnosis of "[disability] plus learning disabilities" is confusing. No it isn't, it really isn't. Whoever told you that is wrong. Source: I am a registered learning disability nurse, trained in learning disabilities. This is my job.
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Mar 12, 2017 17:36
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serious gaylord posted:Where does she get the money for it if shes not paying rent? The government pays her rent, like I said. But it only pays it up to a certain amount - currently that leaves her £12 to pay per month. When she left work she had a share scheme that paid out £2000. She got that in January.
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Mar 12, 2017 17:38
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[X] learning disability, where x is either mild, moderate, severe, profound, other, or unspecified, with 4 extra subdiagnoses for behavioural impairment. Source: being a learning disability nurse, I work alongside learning disability psychiatrists. E: well technically it's still officially mental retardation, but nobody uses that.
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Mar 12, 2017 17:38
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| # ? May 23, 2024 23:25 |
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Taear posted:As I said - I'm not facilitating it. I'm not doing anything at all any more. But my housemate who IS trying to "help" has come to ask what to do. You have my sympathy, I've never had to deal with a proper alcoholic but she sounds like she's properly in the hole with that. If you're on vodka and cannot cope with it being poured away, you're an alcoholic.
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Mar 12, 2017 17:39
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