/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

«‹›6020 »

flick my Mr. Bean: Nov 18, 2014

I got a "haha we're all friends in my classroom no really it's one big family they know it's a joke" vibe from it.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:31

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 15, 2024 19:08

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

I get that vibe from it too but it's totally inappropriate regardless. Teachers are not there to be your friends. They can be great awesome people and great teachers that you admire/respect/whatever but they're not there to be your friend and this was totally crossing the line in an already questionable relationship dynamic.

e: Really it would go a lot better for that guy if he just said "yeah I def got carried away with all this" instead of trying to keep playing it off like it's not a big deal and everyone else is just being an oversensitive dick. Like maybe your wife doesn't need therapy duder maybe you just need to admit fault in this situation you have created.

Moridin920 fucked around with this message at 21:34 on Mar 30, 2017

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:32

new phone who dis: May 24, 2007; by VideoGames; Morbid Hound

Yeah. Man who spends all day around juveniles regresses to their level when things become too friendly and lax. Now his life will be ruined because of his butt.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:33

Who What Now: Sep 10, 2006; by Azathoth

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

Wait you mean all the goons PMing me picture of their asses want to have sex? I,...don't know what to say fellas

Just say "yes". :wink:

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:34

boner confessor: Apr 25, 2013; by R. Guyovich

reminds me of this guy

https://www.si.com/more-sports/2017/03/21/high-school-football-coach-spokane-penis-hot-dog-bun-suspension

quote:

A Spokane, Wash., high school has suspended its football coach amid allegations that he exposed himself to players by putting his penis in a hot dog bun.

Jim Sharkey, 50, is also a fitness and leadership teacher at Ferris High School. A player came forward last summer alleging that Sharkey exposed himself to players at an August leadership camp. Sharkey was grilling when he placed his exposed penis in a hot dog bun, turned around and said �You think that is a big dog�take a look at this,� according to school records obtained by The Spokesman-Review.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:36

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

heeeey here's a thing that isn't that one moron's weird obsession with having the internet validate him showing children his rear end

Me [28f] with my SIL [31f]. I just found out she's been using me to give dangerous advice she's unqualified to give.

quote:

I'm a registered dietitian and exercise physiologist. When I met my SIL I was still in undergrad and we connected over our mutual love of fitness. As I graduated, earned my credentials, and went through grad school I just got used to people asking advice about nutrition and generally didn't mind giving it to family and friends. My SIL was no exception.

At first she would just ask for new exercise programs to change up her routine or recipe/ meal suggestions. I honestly enjoyed helping and we would often work out and cook together. I really thought we were close friends.
There are a few diet related health issues that run through my husband's family and I regularly spend time with those affected to help them with their diet. I do this because I love these people and I know they otherwise wouldn't seek out help from professionals.

I just found out, though, that my SIL has been asking these family members about the advice I give them in order to repeat the information to others. Much of the advice is simple stuff that is pretty universal, but some of it is very very specific for that person. My diet prescriptions take into account blood work, drug interactions, etc. so giving that same prescription to someone else can be harmful. While I was following up on this it also came to light that SIL has been taking the advice and help I give to her, along with BS internet quackery, and touting herself as a nutritionist and a "healthy eating expert". She went so far as to make a separate Facebook for her nutritionist persona and blocked me so I wouldn't see it. Several family members are active on this profile and support her in her endeavor.

I'm incredibly angry and hurt. I did not read her as the kind of person who would do this. What she's doing is dangerous and, in my state, illegal. I also feel incredibly betrayed by my in laws who saw how hard I worked through school to earn my licence and get to where I am today. They know how important qualification is so their support of SIL's sham is killing me.

I have not confronted her yet and I'm not sure how far I want to take this. Do I start with her or the rest of the family first? I do think it's important for her to make some sort of announcement on the Facebook to let her "clients" know to find an actual professional to treat their issues. Is that reasonable to demand when I confront her? I don't want to push the legality or liability angle too much, but I do want to make it clear that if she continues I will report her. How do I structure all of this to sound less aggressive? I'm really angry right now so I'm having trouble trying to script out what needs to be said without it sounding hurtful.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:37

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

Wow SIL sounds like a loving idiot and I doubt there's anything that can be said that will make her stop what she is doing or not cause some huge family drama meltdown.

I'd just stop giving advice to anyone in the family until that situation ends. A bit non-confrontational maybe but :shrug:

quote:

There are a few diet related health issues that run through my husband's family and I regularly spend time with those affected to help them with their diet. I do this because I love these people and I know they otherwise wouldn't seek out help from professionals.

Like they betrayed the trust, stop doing this until they stop enabling SIL's dumb poo poo.

Or like just give them super basic advice and answer yes/no questions but don't go into any further detail at all about any kind of diet or exercise planning.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:38

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

ahahahahaha

Boyfriend (29M) extremely critical of many of my (27f) choices, saying I am privileged and not "woke" enough to see it

quote:

My BF has been changing lately, and not in a good way. I don't know what exactly triggered it but it's just... disappointing.

He was an average, mostly liberal to moderate-leaning person. Now he is a bleeding heart liberal and extremely strident about a multitude of issues. That in itself has bothered me- I am liberal myself but things aren't so cut and dry, and you can't be enraged 24/7. That doesn't help anything.

But lately he has been criticizing me constantly for my first world privilege. For example, I like to get manicures and pedicures occasionally when I'm in the mood, or if I'm stressed. He viciously attacked me about it, telling me the women who work there are "basically slaves" and how symbolically horrendous it is to have someone literally wait on me hand and foot. Okay- I can see that. It's not a great look. So I gave into that one. Then the next thing was me shopping at Whole Foods. He says everything is overpriced (and yeah it is) and only the wealthiest of Americans would dream of paying $30 for a strawberry cake, not even on my birthday (I happen to like that particular cake.) Okay, fine. Yeah, it's kind of an expensive cake. Then one day I was complaining about how cold they keep our office- full blast air conditioning in March? come on guys- and he lays into me about how stuck up it is to complain about air conditioning when most of the world is laboring in the sun. Okay.. yeah I guess that is true.

Then it's about how vain I am. Okay- I like to keep in shape, I like to keep my hair long, I like to put on makeup and moisturizers and serums, I like to buy nice clothes and jewelry - all with the money I earn by my own self. I am not in debt. I am not a shopaholic. I just like to spend on myself because it is literally my own money. He says my vanity is very telling of my status in the world. Okay, yeah? So what am I supposed to do with this information now? Wear a potato sack to work every day? Hope bugs swarm my face so I'm not as attractive?

Finally- he pointed out that my foundations are slightly paler than my actual skin tone. It's like a BB/CC cream, so yes it's a little lighter than I should wear. He said that this is akin to skin-lightening culture and trying to keep white people fashion and trends up on a pedestal. I'M A loving PALE ASIAN PERSON. I absolutely know what culture he is talking about- where being paler is considered "better" and more attractive than darker toned people. But that is NOT why I wear BB cream. It has sunscreen, yall. It's easy to use and it works. I am not trying to be whiter. I am literally a pale, pale person.

I don't think I can take this anymore. I realize I might sound like a truly spoiled, entitled bitch in this post, with my manicures and Whole Foods but... I don't know if there is a way to make this better for him.

This is a him problem is it not? There's no way to repair this is there? I am considering maybe I am just such a deluded idiot that I can't tell how privileged I am- but I don't think so. I recognize my privilege. I'm not even white, first of all. I have in fact faced racism and sexism. (He also says that I am the most privileged Asian though, since I am East Asian and pale and educated here in the States.)

I know I am privileged in many ways. But am I supposed to feel guilty about that forever? I don't know what he expects me to do. He doesn't seem to have any answers either, just criticizes me for not being "woke." He- the most privileged of us all- the White American Male.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:40

flick my Mr. Bean: Nov 18, 2014

Moridin920 posted:

I get that vibe from it too but it's totally inappropriate regardless. Teachers are not there to be your friends. They can be great awesome people and great teachers that you admire/respect/whatever but they're not there to be your friend and this was totally crossing the line in an already questionable relationship dynamic.

Probably should have been clearer in my post but yeah I agree with this.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:42

boner confessor: Apr 25, 2013; by R. Guyovich

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

ahahahahaha

Boyfriend (29M) extremely critical of many of my (27f) choices, saying I am privileged and not "woke" enough to see it

imo dude needs to admit he's engaging in sexual colonialism and dump his asian gf

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:43

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

ahahahahaha

Boyfriend (29M) extremely critical of many of my (27f) choices, saying I am privileged and not "woke" enough to see it

as a leftist, this guy really irritates the gently caress out of me

everyone is a unique individual and has their own understanding of what it means to suffer and it's loving useless to go "you can't complain about X because someone in the world has it worse!!" Shut up rear end in a top hat there's no reason to blast the AC either what a waste of electricity.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:44

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

It's better to skip the mani/pedis along with everyone else and drive the Vietnamese proprietors into poverty.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:47

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

That dude is why trump won.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:46

La Brea Carpet: Nov 22, 2007; I have no mouth and I must post

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

ahahahahaha

Boyfriend (29M) extremely critical of many of my (27f) choices, saying I am privileged and not "woke" enough to see it

From the comments

quote:

[�]DinahMyte77 [score hidden] 51 minutes ago
He sounds like a joy to be around. /s
Does he hold himself to these same standards?

[�]throwawayacount937[S] [score hidden] 47 minutes ago*
I mean, just talking about how he's going to donate books to women's prisons and reading the NY Times every day to stay educated and buy from locally owned stores. Like he's trying to "change" but... god. Whatever. I think I'm just over it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTMow_7H47Q

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:49

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

quote:

reading the NY Times every day to stay educated

lol

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:49

flick my Mr. Bean: Nov 18, 2014

Billions wish they could have access to even basic education and this privileged bastard is reading the new york times every day?

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:53

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

La Brea Carpet posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTMow_7H47Q

This is gold

# ? Mar 30, 2017 21:56

timefly: Apr 29, 2008

Pvt.Scott posted:

Did the old warhorse finally pop off? I've been avoiding news almost entirely for a good while.

And/or my memory has gotten kinda lovely for medical reasons.

Late but "queen mum" means the Queen's mother, who died years ago. It doesn't refer to the actual Queen if that's what you thought

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

ahahahahaha

Boyfriend (29M) extremely critical of many of my (27f) choices, saying I am privileged and not "woke" enough to see it

When will people get it through their heads that privilege isn't inherently something you should feel guilty for

It's nice to be privileged, you should use it to help others, I thought that was the point of "check your privilege"

timefly fucked around with this message at 22:22 on Mar 30, 2017

# ? Mar 30, 2017 22:04

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

Beetle breeding is alright. i liked it better when she was cooperating with park services to reintroduce endangered butterflies to massachusetts but the grant money got redirected to loving solar road bullshit. she fell to breeding fighting beetles for dancing money but got burned out pretty quick. there was some twitter drama last year and someone accused her of releasing predatory mantises into the sales floor at Beetlecon so poo poo's just been fuckin haywire since then. i think someone threw a container of ladybugs at my window. either that or a robin sitting on my rain gutter puked.

anyway haha I found this post just by the hilarious title alone:

My [30M] wife [34F] ran afoul of Yakuza beetle warriors & now all the teppanyaki chefs in town constantly cut my tires every time I want teppanyaki. What should I do?

the post isn't important so don't bother googling it. That hilarious title is hilarious enough that it warrants discussion on its own merit. I mean obviously this dude shouldn't go on some kind of rampage because, rampages are never good. but what SHOULD he do, do you think?

# ? Mar 30, 2017 22:12

christmas boots: Oct 15, 2012; To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out; Biscuit Hider

I did not think there would be so much drama in the beetle breeding business

# ? Mar 30, 2017 22:16

the bitcoin of weed: Nov 1, 2014

why is there a Beetlecon

# ? Mar 30, 2017 22:18

purple death ray: Jul 28, 2007; me omw 2 steal ur girl

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

Beetle breeding is alright. i liked it better when she was cooperating with park services to reintroduce endangered butterflies to massachusetts but the grant money got redirected to loving solar road bullshit. she fell to breeding fighting beetles for dancing money but got burned out pretty quick. there was some twitter drama last year and someone accused her of releasing predatory mantises into the sales floor at Beetlecon so poo poo's just been fuckin haywire since then. i think someone threw a container of ladybugs at my window. either that or a robin sitting on my rain gutter puked.

anyway haha I found this post just by the hilarious title alone:

My [30M] wife [34F] ran afoul of Yakuza beetle warriors & now all the teppanyaki chefs in town constantly cut my tires every time I want teppanyaki. What should I do?

the post isn't important so don't bother googling it. That hilarious title is hilarious enough that it warrants discussion on its own merit. I mean obviously this dude shouldn't go on some kind of rampage because, rampages are never good. but what SHOULD he do, do you think?

I think he should go on a rampage

# ? Mar 30, 2017 22:19

MF_James: May 8, 2008; I CANNOT HANDLE BEING CALLED OUT ON MY DUMBASS OPINIONS ABOUT ANTI-VIRUS AND SECURITY. I REALLY LIKE TO THINK THAT I KNOW THINGS HERE

INSTEAD I AM GOING TO WHINE ABOUT IT IN OTHER THREADS SO MY OPINION CAN FEEL VALIDATED IN AN ECHO CHAMBER I LIKE

I had a friend that bred something like 300 preying mantis' and released them into a park near his house, they are not native to the area, quickly took over, and are still there to this day... oddly though they didn't really spread out to neighboring areas.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 22:22

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

Beetle breeding is alright. i liked it better when she was cooperating with park services to reintroduce endangered butterflies to massachusetts but the grant money got redirected to loving solar road bullshit. she fell to breeding fighting beetles for dancing money but got burned out pretty quick. there was some twitter drama last year and someone accused her of releasing predatory mantises into the sales floor at Beetlecon so poo poo's just been fuckin haywire since then. i think someone threw a container of ladybugs at my window. either that or a robin sitting on my rain gutter puked.

anyway haha I found this post just by the hilarious title alone:

My [30M] wife [34F] ran afoul of Yakuza beetle warriors & now all the teppanyaki chefs in town constantly cut my tires every time I want teppanyaki. What should I do?

the post isn't important so don't bother googling it. That hilarious title is hilarious enough that it warrants discussion on its own merit. I mean obviously this dude shouldn't go on some kind of rampage because, rampages are never good. but what SHOULD he do, do you think?

Please buy her an account and have her post a thread about her experiences and related drama around tje shadowy world of beetle breeding.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 22:36

Lonely Virgil: Oct 9, 2012

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

ahahahahaha

Boyfriend (29M) extremely critical of many of my (27f) choices, saying I am privileged and not "woke" enough to see it

murder this man and give his wealth to the poor.

I bet he dresses in lumberjack chic and has a greasy manbun.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 22:59

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

hey previous poster whom i'm not gonna quote: Beetlecon happens so folks can show off unique morphs and the physical prowress of their (now often patented) beetle lineage. also so beetle breeders can meet and gently caress, theyre the only internet subculture with no dedicated dating app, so much like insects themselves they frequently save up all their sexhaving for that one glorious weekend in Boise.

MF_James posted:

I had a friend that bred something like 300 preying mantis' and released them into a park near his house, they are not native to the area, quickly took over, and are still there to this day... oddly though they didn't really spread out to neighboring areas.

the exotic pet trade is basically 100% low-grade Captain Planet villains. i'm glad your friend is about to get his doorstep shat on when you PM me his address later.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 23:07

MF_James: May 8, 2008; I CANNOT HANDLE BEING CALLED OUT ON MY DUMBASS OPINIONS ABOUT ANTI-VIRUS AND SECURITY. I REALLY LIKE TO THINK THAT I KNOW THINGS HERE

INSTEAD I AM GOING TO WHINE ABOUT IT IN OTHER THREADS SO MY OPINION CAN FEEL VALIDATED IN AN ECHO CHAMBER I LIKE

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

hey previous poster whom i'm not gonna quote: Beetlecon happens so folks can show off unique morphs and the physical prowress of their (now often patented) beetle lineage. also so beetle breeders can meet and gently caress, theyre the only internet subculture with no dedicated dating app, so much like insects themselves they frequently save up all their sexhaving for that one glorious weekend in Boise.

the exotic pet trade is basically 100% low-grade Captain Planet villains. i'm glad your friend is about to get his doorstep shat on when you PM me his address later.

oh he wasn't in the pet trade, just did it for funsies.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 23:09

christmas boots: Oct 15, 2012; To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out; Biscuit Hider

I really hope you nerds use your beetles as an excuse to flirt with each other, like normal people do with dogs.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 23:09

Panfilo: Aug 27, 2011; EXISTENCE IS PAIN😬

You guys have the gooniest taste in women I swear to god.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 23:16

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

MF_James posted:

oh he wasn't in the pet trade, just did it for funsies.

please inform him that ecocide is neither fun, nor cool, nor a dank meme stash. i mean i would also tell him if. . . certain things were PMd. into my inbox.

edit: mods ignore this post.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 23:22

MF_James: May 8, 2008; I CANNOT HANDLE BEING CALLED OUT ON MY DUMBASS OPINIONS ABOUT ANTI-VIRUS AND SECURITY. I REALLY LIKE TO THINK THAT I KNOW THINGS HERE

INSTEAD I AM GOING TO WHINE ABOUT IT IN OTHER THREADS SO MY OPINION CAN FEEL VALIDATED IN AN ECHO CHAMBER I LIKE

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

please inform him that ecocide is neither fun, nor cool, nor a dank meme stash. i mean i would also tell him if. . . certain things were PMd. into my inbox.

edit: mods ignore this post.

yeah I wouldn't tell you anyway, but we were 16 at the time so uhh gently caress like 15-16 years ago, pretty sure he wouldn't do that now, he's more of a fish guy anyway at this point.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 23:23

Shadin: Jun 28, 2009

MF_James posted:

yeah I wouldn't tell you anyway, but we were 16 at the time so uhh gently caress like 15-16 years ago, pretty sure he wouldn't do that now, he's more of a fish guy anyway at this point.

So he's escalated to piranha?

# ? Mar 30, 2017 23:29

MF_James: May 8, 2008; I CANNOT HANDLE BEING CALLED OUT ON MY DUMBASS OPINIONS ABOUT ANTI-VIRUS AND SECURITY. I REALLY LIKE TO THINK THAT I KNOW THINGS HERE

INSTEAD I AM GOING TO WHINE ABOUT IT IN OTHER THREADS SO MY OPINION CAN FEEL VALIDATED IN AN ECHO CHAMBER I LIKE

Shadin posted:

So he's escalated to piranha?

He does have piranhas but has not, and is not planning on, releasing them. They are salt water guys so would not survive around here for very long anyway.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 23:32

Who What Now: Sep 10, 2006; by Azathoth

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

hey previous poster whom i'm not gonna quote: Beetlecon happens so folks can show off unique morphs and the physical prowress of their (now often patented) beetle lineage.

Why the gently caress aren't the super-beetle fights televised or at least up on YouTube?

# ? Mar 30, 2017 23:40

Gumbel2Gumbel: Apr 28, 2010

MF_James posted:

He does have piranhas but has not, and is not planning on, releasing them. They are salt water guys so would not survive around here for very long anyway.

They're freshwater fish

# ? Mar 30, 2017 23:42

La Brea Carpet: Nov 22, 2007; I have no mouth and I must post

Posting this one for the comment below

Me (38M) how to deal with what just happened

quote:

First let me apologize for grammar mistakes, being a foreigner it�s always hard. I ( 38M) moved to the USA 9 years ago to graduate program, met American girl (29F) and decided to stay here. We started dating a year before finishing university, but never taught it will turn into something serious.

Just when we were supposed to graduate she was diagnosed with Cancer and that is when things turn serious as I seriously step up to be there for her. I moved in with her to be there for her to deal with her illness; drive her to appointments, cook, pay bills etc. Her parents and brother and sister adored me, same as rest of her family which was very important for me as mine own was far away. We also moved to her city where I basically didn�t know anyone, so all my acquaintances were her friends. She was not employed, as we wanted for her to focus on her health.

Her parents helps us and are just warm and nice people.

After an 18 long and hard months she was finally in remission and things turn back to normal. She basically starts mentioning marriage so I propose and we become engaged. We barely had any issues, barely fights and things were just perfect. She started working as well and I got promoted and start earning good money.

Everything changed 12 months later as I start feeling down and ill all the time. Went for checkup and it turns out I had cancer too. You can imagine, I was devastated but I have so many things to loose, so I was determined to fight. She was very quiet once I told her about my illness which is understandable as she was still dealing with trauma from her own illness. We discuss chemotherapy and everything else I need to do. One day after work I enter the apartment and right away notice something is strange. Her staff was gone and just very short later stating that she can�t deal with another illness at this moment. She says, she changed phone number and ask me not to contact her family or friends. She wishes me good luck and asks for respect that she wants to move with her life.

I totally get that she can�t deal with my illness, but such a cold break up when we had zero issues in relationship and alienating me from her family and mutual friends and living me with zero support system, sound so hard and cruel for me that I don�t even know where to turn. I have stable job and boss who understand my situation and my financial existence is not in any danger but idea that I need to deal with this all alone is making me lose my mind. I learned I am not strong enough I taught I was. I had unrealistic expectations that she will suddenly open our door and walk in and things between us will work out, because I still love her so much, but how to move forward, accept reality, what in a hack I am supposed to do. I know this is more venting then anything so I apologize for that.

tl;dr: Summary, should I move forward somehow or still try to reach her?

quote:

I know this probably won't help, but she used you. When it came time to her to pay back the kindness you showed her, she couldn't do it. That's how a lot of women are built. They see the right now, and not the bigger picture. Not all women mind you.

Now, if I were you, the first thing I would do is let all her friends and family know. Every single one of them. I'd tell them that since you won't be able to see them very much due to her actions, that you wanted the chance to let them know how much you appreciate their kindness towards you. I wouldn't lie about the situation between you two, just let people draw their own conclusions.

Just my .02, probably not the best advice but I can be a spiteful person sometimes.