Lockback posted:

I don't even know about this one. If you feel like skipping the content you get the gist from the title.

My(27F) boyfriends(27M) bestfriend(27M) ate my betta fish

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

fish eating one is bizarre, good thing her dog was with her


No self-awareness on this one:
Not sure what my [m34] neighbor [f 20] is up to for the past few months. Been showing her self in the most minimalistic of clothing either in her back yard / pool and also notice her quite often in her room/home (when no is around) walking bare. What is she trying to get at?

fruit on the bottom posted:

I don't see the issue. She doesn't want to see Richard, it doesn't sound like Joe is really fighting to save that relationship. Everyone's happy, including Richard who got a free sushi dinner.

Pick posted:

Also I would laugh in my husband's face if he went high to get a massage and accidentally got jerked off by an elderly Korean and cried

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

fish eating one is bizarre, good thing her dog was with her


No self-awareness on this one:
Not sure what my [m34] neighbor [f 20] is up to for the past few months. Been showing her self in the most minimalistic of clothing either in her back yard / pool and also notice her quite often in her room/home (when no is around) walking bare. What is she trying to get at?

Bamabalacha posted:

For real, I would either assume they massively fudged some details or I would laugh and laugh and laugh and never stop.

Dienes posted:

She wears bathing suits in her pool! She's clearly showing off for me. When I look in her bedroom window, sometimes she is naked! This can only be a sign she wants me.

quote:

So I am a single mom of 2 twin boys that well call Luther and Donovan (3). My husband died of cancer 4 months after they were born after being diagnosed for 48 hours. It was obviously a huge shock but luckily I have amazing family and friends that all rallied together and took care of me and my boys. I still see a therapist but the years are passing and can feel the pain fading more and more with each year.

My husband and i were very smart with our money and waited about 10 years before trying for our boys and when he died I received a considerable sum of money in the form of life insurance and such. I also am a trained RN and went back to work about a year after he died and I felt like I could be away from Luther and Donovan. However, going back to work meant placing them into a daycare program. At first it was great but then it wasn't. To spare the details I had one of my boys come home with a cut lip and black eye and magically no one saw how it happened. Granted boys can be boys but that's a fairly large injury for no one to see happen.

So I decided to hire a nanny. I went through a nanny service in my city and was paired with a couple but never really felt the "click" with anyone till I met Tabitha (24). Tabitha and I were instant connection from the moment we met. What's even more is the cnnection she instantly had with my twins, even Luther who is EXTREMELY shy. They all just instantly fell in love and I was so beyond grateful. I come home to a clean house, happy kids, and dinner. I more then make up in compensation to Tabitha in hopes that she'll stay with us for the years to come.

But now my problem is this. Tabitha is stunningly beautiful. I mean the first moment I met her my jaw almost touched the ground. She is the kind of natural beauty that is almost sickening because it's just so unfair that a human can look that good without even trying. Her beauty was obviously never an issue for me at all since she also happens to be an amazing person and nanny for my family.

My husband and I moved into our neighborhood about our 5th year of marriage so these are all families I know very well. Some of them actually were a huge support during the time of his death. Most of the families are young husbands and wives and a few them have nannies as well. They schedule play dates on an app called Meetup and go to parks and fun activities with all the kids. I told Tabitha about it right away and she was extremely excited to be out and about with other adults and to let the twins socialize with other kids. So the first event came and went and I of course asked Tabitha how it went. She seemed a little.... Guarded as she told, "Fine." And didn't go into many more details. I just shrugged it off and honestly didn't think much about it.

About a week later I got a notification for another meetup and told Tabitha about it. She got really really nervous and asked if she had to go. I said of course not but what was the problem? She burst into tears and said that the last play date she went to was awful. She said that the moms refused to even look at her or talk to her and when she asked a simple question of them snapped at her and said, "obviously there's no brains in that pretty body, huh?" She was stunned and decided to take the boys to the park playground since she obviously wasn't welcomed. I guess that the husband of one of these moms chased her down as she was leaving and told her that it was just petty jealously and that he would talk to these women for her since they obviously did not know her and any friend of our family was welcome in the neighborhood. Then he asked for her phone number to schedule more up coming play dates that would be without the drama. Tabitha said that he was really being nice and did not pick up a creepy vibe at all.

Then I guess the texts started. I know this father personally as they are next door neighbors and I just can't believe that he would do this but Tabitha even showed me her phone and it was....sickening to say the least. There's texts asking for nudes, texts saying that he watches her from his wondows, texts that say he's falling in love with her, even a text saying he would pay her $1000 just to smell her hair?!?! What the actual gently caress???? Not only that but hen she started recieving texts from other phone numbers, numbers I don't even have in my phone claiming to be from other fathers in the neighborhood that are "secret admirers" and saying lewd and disgusting things to her.

I literally have no idea what to do. I am not about to give up the nanny that has been nothing short of amazing with my children, that much I know. I know I could probably go to the police for the messages but what can they do? She's not a minor and they never acted upon anything but some of these messages are really unnerving. Should I raise hell in my neighborhood and risk getting blacklisted? Not that I obviously want friends like that any way but I know it will cause a huge up roar. Or should i even consider moving? I just don't know what to do

tl;dr: My wonderful nanny has been getting creeped on by my neighbors and I don't know what to do.

Really quick update: on the phone with realtor who is going to come tomorrow to get the selling process started. Thanks guys.

quote:

I live in a calm residential neighborhood. There's a large tree in front of my house that kids like to sit under. A couple of my neighbors (13, f) are sitting under the tree. My sister calls me into the living room because an unfamiliar older man is hanging out the window of his car chatting with them.

Strange, but it seemed like they knew him so I ignored it. She called me back when the conversation had escalated to a sexual nature. He was talking to the girls about dating older men, convincing them it wasn’t so bad. Asked their age. They said 13. He explained he had a 14 year old girlfriend but waited until she was 18 to have sex so it was okay.

It was a little creepy so I figured I’d just go outside so he knows people are around. I pretend I'm grabbing something from the car and catch his eye. He smiles. I walk over, greet him and the girls and ask how it's going. He says he's "blessed, and highly favored" with an overly chipper tone. I obviously looked concerned because he directed the girls to "tell her who I am so she won't be worried."

One says, "he's uncle Ed." He claims he’s the girls’ neighbor, lives on the corner and asks if I've seen him around walking a baby down the street. Nope. He adds that he knows their parents, and I can talk to them if I'm concerned. But they seem to know each other so I've done my part. I say, "I don't need to speak with their parents. I just wanted to make sure everything was alright. The conversation seemed a little adult to be having with these young ladies so I thought I'd check in."

He dropped the happy tone and called me rude for coming out and “attacking him”. He says “as an adult, [I] should have pulled him aside. We’re just talking, no adult conversation. They’re fine. They don’t need you coming out here.”

I asked if he, as an adult, normally discussed his sex life with 13 year olds. He denied that ever happened. I said I've been listening for several minutes. I heard you.

"Okay, then-then you need to list out everything I said then." He started to stutter.

No, I don't. You know what you said. We both know.

He grew louder and angry so my sister joined me outside. She reaffirmed that she also heard and felt it wasn’t appropriate. He sends the girls back home to the corner. My sister adds, "you said you have children. You don't think it'd be weird if a grown man was talking to them the way you are?"

He immediately insults her: calls her a "little girl" and says to return to the house and let the adults speak. (Funny. She is older than me.) My sister, while hesitant with conflict, is quick to argue. Sigh. So she starts arguing with the man, telling him that she's grown and he should act like he is too. They're now yelling at each other which is loving pointless. So I try to deescalate and say, sir, you apparently know the girls. Why don't head back home too."

Nope. He rants about how he can stay wherever he wants, yells other profanities, insults us both. Sister yells back. gently caress this. I have to simultaneously calm my sister and get this creep away from our house. (Not to mention, my sister needed to go to work and he was blocking our driveway.) I ask my sister to hand me her phone so I can copy down his plates and let the police resolve this. He says, "sure, and I'll get a paper and copy yours down too."

“Dude, I live here. What's there to report?”

I'm trying to get my sister to hand me her phone but she's too engaged in a verbal battle. I'm like, Sally, please, just give me the phone. So then he mocks me, "yeah, Sally, give her the phone, loving four-eyes." (We both wear glasses. I remind you that this is a grown rear end man with 3rd grade insults.) They continue going back and forth. He insults her hair. She insults his hair. He insults her car. She insults his. He calls us names. She calls him names. I'm just trying to wrangle the phone away. I go towards the front of his car to copy his plates and he accelerates forward towards me. I go for the back plates, he says "and where are you going?" and speeds his car in reverse, threatening to hit me.

I was loving done. I'm not getting ran over for this poo poo. I snatch the phone and call the cops. He zooms away as I read the dispatcher his plate number. Jesus Christ.

I don't know what they told the mother. But about 10 minutes later she knocked on my door with the girls. She thanked me for stepping in “because most people won't”. She said she knows it "may have looked weird" but he really is a "friend." I asked her if he normally has adult conversations with her kids. She said, "oh no, he works at the daycare so he was just talking to them about other kids there."

I disengaged. I no longer wanted anything to do with this mess. I was too emotionally exhausted to try to convince her. If she was fine with it, there was nothing I could do.

Instead, I tried to decompress by talking with friends. Only, I see from my living room that the girls are going around to my neighbors complaining that we called the police for no reason.

I've lived in this neighborhood for the majority of my life and feel I have a good reputation here. My neighbors have celebrated important life events with me. Gave gifts for my graduations. We exchange food and plants. So I'd really hate for my reputation to be sullied due to this.

However, I really want nothing more to do with this. But because we all live in this small neighborhood, I'm wondering if I should acknowledge it further? If the man really does live near, I'll probably see him again. Is it even worth explaining my "side" to the neighbors? Or further engaging the girls' parents? Is it worth apologizing to the man for the sake of cohabitation? Should I just put it all behind us? I have no idea where to go from here.

My guess is the girls appreciated the mature attention. We all wanted to grow up quickly, right? I regret stepping in but when I was their age I wished someone would step in when older men got too personal. Clearly I was wrong.

tl;dr: I inquired about a strange guy talking to my young neighbors. It escalated into a verbal altercation with him threatening to hit me with his car and refusing to leave my house. Now I'm being blamed for calling the police "for nothing". How do I go about cohabiting with these people?

UPDATE

I've contacted the mother. Waiting for her to respond so we can talk but I've detailed her what I shared here.

To everyone who offered advice and support: thank you. I greatly appreciate all of your opinions, stories and suggestions. I will update when I can.

To the "prove to me this happened" people: No. I have much more poo poo to deal with than trying to convince your dumb rear end.

To the "OMG Why Didn't You Do Exactly This I'm So Angry" people: gently caress off. Maybe you're trying to be helpful. BUT THINK: this was a very heated situation. Surely I could've done something different. Hindsight is 20/20. It must be nice to judge from your comfy outsider perspective when you had no involvement. I can't change the past. But again, thanks to those contributing to steps moving forward.

Blue Train posted:

If the girls and their parents are all saying it's fine I'm kind of inclined to say maybe she misheard something?

Blue Train posted:

If the girls and their parents are all saying it's fine I'm kind of inclined to say maybe she misheard something? I certainly wouldn't be able to hear a conversation being had from a car in the street from inside my house, even with the windows open

CharlestheHammer posted:

Yeah that's the problem and how most of these problems become a thing.

Parents are actually terrible at figuring pedophilles are.

quote:

Strange, but it seemed like they knew him so I ignored it. She called me back when the conversation had escalated to a sexual nature. He was talking to the girls about dating older men, convincing them it wasn’t so bad. Asked their age. They said 13. He explained he had a 14 year old girlfriend but waited until she was 18 to have sex so it was okay.

It was a little creepy so I figured I’d just go outside so he knows people are around. I pretend I'm grabbing something from the car and catch his eye. He smiles. I walk over, greet him and the girls and ask how it's going. He says he's "blessed, and highly favored" with an overly chipper tone. I obviously looked concerned because he directed the girls to "tell her who I am so she won't be worried."

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

just a simple misunderstanding where I as a totally cool dude was was having a fine, normal conversation with a couple of underage girls and what are you writing down GET THE gently caress AWAY I'LL MURDER YOU BITCH

quote:

Instead, I tried to decompress by talking with friends. Only, I see from my living room that the girls are going around to my neighbors complaining that we called the police for no reason.

Lockback posted:

How did she know they were doing this?

Lockback posted:

How did she know they were doing this?

CharlestheHammer posted:

Yeah that's the problem and how most of these problems become a thing.

Parents are actually terrible at figuring pedophilles are.

Lockback posted:

I [27] received a happy ending at one of the most well reviewed/well known spas in Manhattan the day my wife [23] went out of town. I really need input on how to deal with what feels like irreparable damage to our relationship.

Blue Train posted:

If the girls and their parents are all saying it's fine I'm kind of inclined to say maybe she misheard something? I certainly wouldn't be able to hear a conversation being had from a car in the street from inside my house, even with the windows open

CharlestheHammer posted:

I assumed she asked about it later.

She wasn't streaming that post live,

Tiny Deer posted:

The fact that the thirteen year olds are dumb is in no way evidence this guy isn't a major creep.

His OWN WORDS describe his fourteen year old girlfriend so it's probably safe to assume he's up to some creepy poo poo talking about sex with thirteen year old girls when he thought there was no one around to see him.

Grem posted:

In fact probably the easiest accomplishment I've achieved in my life has been not being accused as a pedophile. It's not that hard, do appropriate things with the appropriate aged people. Don't have weird rear end conversations under the neighborhood kissing tree with minors and you're golden.

Tiny Deer posted:

The fact that the thirteen year olds are dumb is in no way evidence this guy isn't a major creep.

His OWN WORDS describe his fourteen year old girlfriend so it's probably safe to assume he's up to some creepy poo poo talking about sex with thirteen year old girls when he thought there was no one around to see him.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

the reason there's always these stories coming out of pedophiles eventually getting caught after raping hundreds of kids over the course of decades without anyone doing anything is because most of them are at least as subtle as this dude, and, well, probably the dozen people who tried to report them for loving children previously were just jelly of his well-groomed barely-legal girlfriend

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

this dude is the exact level of subtlety it takes for pedos to get away with raping hundreds of kids over the course of like decades with nobody lifting a finger until after his victims are all growed up

Lockback posted:

Nope, she was asking advice IF she should talk to the neighbors or not, so she hasn't spoken to anybody.

blarzgh posted:

I don't understand how anybody is reading any of these stories without 100% skepticism. Like even people under oath, in trial lie their asses off and change their stories to try to support whatever narrative they're pushing.

Its best to assume that whatever you're reading is almost certain false to a degree that, had you been there yourself, you would say, "thats not how it happened."

We like to laugh at these because of the picture they paint, not the reality they purport to convey. There is literally no point in trying to parse out what parts are true and what parts are fake.

WampaLord posted:

Dude also talked like a youth pastor, which is a giant with all his bullshit about "I feel blessed and highly favored."

Blue Train posted:

CharlestheHammer posted:

That post seems to be aimed at you so uh?