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I ride bikes all day
Sep 10, 2007

I shitposted in the same thread for 2 years and all I got was this red text av. Ask me about my autism!



College Slice

Donkringel posted:

How did he do that? D6 good research pretender high magic scales?

Some other nations helped pay the costs as well, if I recall correctly.

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Tagichatn
Jun 7, 2009

Ramc posted:

Oceania is very good at blitzing its UW neighbors because cheap satyrs

I barely build any since I had plenty of cash to make centaurs. Guess I didn't need them for Pelagia at least!

Cathode Raymond
Dec 30, 2015

My antenna is telling me that you're probably wrong about this.
Soiled Meat

twig1919 posted:

Didn't nuclearmonkee play a game where he cast burden of time on year 1 as R'leh? That sounds like a pretty funny troll strat.

Is this in an lp somewhere?

Corbeau
Sep 13, 2010

Jack of All Trades
Pretty sure the meme is turn 14 BoT, and it's been done by multiple people since. It's probably the main reason water nations are banned in most games.
That said, I've also seen it rushed by a land nation for very good reasons (like being a non-blood nation in LA).

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves
Lets talk about some of our favorite u-water units, the obscure little guys who don't appear in games that much because u-water is shite.



Fuckin' Shark Warriors. They are Sharks with Spears. That's rad. Downside: Their gear will literally rust away from the turn you build them, amazing game design illwinter.

Donkringel
Apr 22, 2008

Gridlocked posted:

Downside: Their gear will literally rust away from the turn you build them, amazing game design illwinter.

Wait what the gently caress?

Cythereal
Nov 8, 2009

I love the potoo,
and the potoo loves you.

Donkringel posted:

Wait what the gently caress?

Taking a wild guess here, armor that in the game files has a tag as metal (I've seen LPs mention battle spells that rust armor) is set to rust away when underwater. Shark soldiers wear metal armor. Shark soldiers are recruited underwater. You can see the problem.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

Cythereal posted:

Taking a wild guess here, armor that in the game files has a tag as metal (I've seen LPs mention battle spells that rust armor) is set to rust away when underwater. Shark soldiers wear metal armor. Shark soldiers are recruited underwater. You can see the problem.

Got it one.

goatface
Dec 5, 2007

I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.


Grimey Drawer
I thought they'd taken the ferrous tag off those, but I guess it was only for a few other things.

MagicBoots
Mar 29, 2010

How about we pump the atmosphere full of methane?
You put me on Cargo handling optimization?! I am the premier defense specialist in the entirety of the UN!
Don't you dare pull my funding!
You can't cut back on funding!
You will regret this!

goatface posted:

I thought they'd taken the ferrous tag off those, but I guess it was only for a few other things.

R'lyeh slave princes also have the rusting armor problem. UW nations in general do not seem to have been very well thought out.

funktopus
Jan 11, 2009
I mean, I don't want them to go all Toady on it and program in all the physical properties for every metal, but distinguishing between metals that rust and metals that don't would be nice.

goatface
Dec 5, 2007

I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.


Grimey Drawer
There is a "ferrous" flag that can be put on (or taken off) armour, or it can be made of bronze, or "meteorite". Armours are defined things rather than just stats of the unit.

They've just left a bunch of underwater things in the same armour type as a bunch of on-land stuff and for some reason can't be arsed to do a quick search of aquatic or amphibious and swap the armour out.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

goatface posted:

There is a "ferrous" flag that can be put on (or taken off) armour, or it can be made of bronze, or "meteorite". Armours are defined things rather than just stats of the unit.

They've just left a bunch of underwater things in the same armour type as a bunch of on-land stuff and for some reason can't be arsed to do a quick search of aquatic or amphibious and swap the armour out.

Apparently if the units in question are garrisoned in a fortress they get their gear repaired constantly though this costs a bit extra resource every turn. Once they move outside a province with a fort however....

Lord Koth
Jan 8, 2012

What happened is that the "metal armor/weapons rust underwater" thing was only added in a patch early last year, as prior to that the rusting mechanic only existed as the aftereffect of certain spells. Illwinter just didn't bother to go through all the equipment the various UW races used when they did so and modify those that this screwed over. And they're pretty slow in regards to major patches, so they only just tweaked the tags on some, not all, of the UW equipment adversely affected in a very recent patch.

Tagichatn
Jun 7, 2009

Turn 16


Not too many messages this turn.


A proclamation from Nazca! Pretty funny if true.

We got 14 sea lions, hooray! They’re ok but I’m summoning them to help in the Atlantis war since I don’t have much use for nature gems in combat.






Pretty cool event, we like water gems and the armor is pretty good. Some earth gems and a bad event. 40 unrest is a lot but our army in that province is better used to take back our lost land province rather than patrolling. I’ll bump up the pd to 10 but our order will reduce unrest naturally.




Siege of Pelagia is progressing but we don’t know how fast exactly. We may not even need to storm the castle, Pelagia is losing candles like crazy here. They went from 6 last turn to 2 this turn, thanks to my prophet preaching and my god just being here. I think my dominion score is higher than Pelagia. If he loses all of his dominion, then *poof* he’s gone. We can take the cap without a fight even.

Also I’m curious what happened with Marignon and Abysia last turn. Pissbitch was in this province and now she’s not and Abysia took the adjacent indie province. What I hope happened is a bump and their pretender died but who knows.


Ok so not much to do here. My capricorn is summoning more sea lions, the other one is researching. My forts are building more centaurs and cataphracts. I think I can afford to make some land incursions actually but I don’t know exactly what Atlantis is doing. I still only have a single amphibious scout but I’m making another one. I’ll keep sieging Pelagia but I think a domkill strategy would be faster and easier.

Tune in next turn for another boring turn! Something interesting will happen eventually, right?

PurpleXVI
Oct 30, 2011

Spewing insults, pissing off all your neighbors, betraying your allies, backing out of treaties and accords, and generally screwing over the global environment?
ALL PART OF MY BRILLIANT STRATEGY!
So wait, if someone borrowed Nazca's password to send a message, did they also waste his turn for him? :v:

Decrepus
May 21, 2008

In the end, his dominion did not touch a single poster.


PurpleXVI posted:

So wait, if someone borrowed Nazca's password to send a message, did they also waste his turn for him? :v:

It's possible they logged in, had the turn download, wrote the message, and resubmit the turn in its entirety. They probably did that but with the pw they could do anything they wanted.

How are u
May 19, 2005

by Azathoth
Note that if you log into somebody else's turn (whether they forgot to put a password, said their password in irc, or whatever) and gently caress their poo poo up i.e. change army orders, mage scripting, tear down their forts, etc. and you are caught then you will never play another game again because that's Grade-A Cheating and a hugely dumb and unfun thing to do.

Tagichatn
Jun 7, 2009

Turn 17


Not a lot of messages again. More sea lions, failed site search.


There was a battle in Anphalia, that farmland province that indies took from us. Took it back, no problem. Not even a single casualty as you can see.


An unexpected event! A single earth gem? Well that’s ok I guess. Then our scout was discovered and killed, we’ll have a harder time seeing what Marignon is up to now. Siege continues in Pelagia.

Our domkill strategy might not work here. Pelagia gained a few candles in their cap so maybe they have guys preaching now. Well, we’ll build some temples nearby anyway, Pelagia’s scales suck so I want their dominion out asap anyway. I guess I forgot to take a screenshot of this, sorry! At least a battle is more exciting than domkill, right?


No exciting new strategies unfortunate. Our aquatic scout moves overland to where I assume Atlantis’ capital is. We are building more scouts to get a better idea of the situation on land although planning for that might be premature. Our forts are all building more fighting units and capricorns. I’d really love a nature 5 one but it’s a 2.5% chance unfortunately. Our cap is actually building a bunch of regular satyrs. They’re crap so why am I doing this? Well they are stealthy and we have a stealthy commander so my plan is to have several armies invade Atlantis’ territory before our NAP runs out.. With luck, I can cut off his capital although I don’t actually know where it is yet.

Tune in next turn for a sneak peak at graphs! Well, I got the sneak peek, I think I forgot to save the link to them

Cathode Raymond
Dec 30, 2015

My antenna is telling me that you're probably wrong about this.
Soiled Meat
Are sea lions the water equivalent of wolves?

PurpleXVI
Oct 30, 2011

Spewing insults, pissing off all your neighbors, betraying your allies, backing out of treaties and accords, and generally screwing over the global environment?
ALL PART OF MY BRILLIANT STRATEGY!
Got any big "global" maps yet so we can have an idea of how much of the oceans you own?

goatface
Dec 5, 2007

I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.


Grimey Drawer

Cathode Raymond posted:

Are sea lions the water equivalent of wolves?

No, those are sea dogs. Sea lions are the equivalent of lions.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves
I guess the fun part about u-water is there is a lot of space for summons experimentation cause its not been done that much yet?

I quite like the look of the Kraken:



Conj 3 - so not super early but 3 water gems from a W3 mage per Size 6 with 60 HP unit and 4 weapons. Decent strength and ok attack skill.

I also really like the Cave Crab:



Conj 3 same as the Kraken but only needs 2 earth gems and 1E1W paths which depending on your race maybe easier. Size 4 with 54 HP, 22 protection and better strength, attack and defense than the Kraken. Sadly can only be summoned IN cave provinces which are few and far between.

Cerebral Bore
Apr 21, 2010


Fun Shoe
One thing that I think would help fix underwater nations is to remove the 1 province a turn limit on underwater movement. If underwater nations could get an advantage in strategic mobility rather than being hosed over by not getting anywhere in any reasonable timeframe I think they would be much more competitive.

Tagichatn
Jun 7, 2009

PurpleXVI posted:

Got any big "global" maps yet so we can have an idea of how much of the oceans you own?

Sorry, I forgot to take screenshots of the larger map. I'll look through and see if I can stitch some together. If not, maybe I can find an empty map and MS paint it up. It's really not a very good map though imo. Corbeau maps are my jam now

Also crabs are good but they have abysmal magic resistance. There are actually a few spells and abilities that specifically target animals but I doubt anyone would use those just for a few crabs. Either way, this map has no underwater cave provinces.

Kraken are cool but in practice, their large size and low defensive stats mean they get surrounded and killed easily. They still take down a bunch of dudes but it's not worth it imo.

ousire
Dec 11, 2013

Now, Red! Seal the deal with a catchy one-liner!
the more I hear about underwater nations the more it seems like the developers went out of their way to dick them over. Was underwater super overpowered in the early days of Dominions and it got nerfed to oblivion? Or is this just another case of Dominions Brand "Balancing"?

Tagichatn
Jun 7, 2009

The problem with underwater nations being good is that it's really hard to invade them as a land nation. Most of your spells won't work underwater and your troops are going to be poor amphibians which gives you pretty hefty penalties to several stats. If they were good, they'd be too annoying to deal with. That's even with the numerous ways of loving over underwater nations while underwater nations have much fewer options for going on land.

MagicBoots
Mar 29, 2010

How about we pump the atmosphere full of methane?
You put me on Cargo handling optimization?! I am the premier defense specialist in the entirety of the UN!
Don't you dare pull my funding!
You can't cut back on funding!
You will regret this!

The problem with krakens is that they can't go on land, they are also a little fragile so they need some buffing. A lot of the somewhat good UW units have no easy path to land so even when you do manage to make landfall you're doing it with garbage. And since UW provinces have poor income you can't even go for a quantity vs quality strategy.

goatface
Dec 5, 2007

I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.


Grimey Drawer
Also coastal recruitment is cancer.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves
The best UW nations are the undead nations :colbert: skeletons are always good.

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Can thrones even spawn in underwater provinces though? It seems to me that even if there was an underwater player who was really difficult to uproot with poor land units, you could still win the game by just ignoring them.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

vyelkin posted:

Can thrones even spawn in underwater provinces though? It seems to me that even if there was an underwater player who was really difficult to uproot with poor land units, you could still win the game by just ignoring them.

Yes. And there are even some U-Water themed thrones to go with them, though most thrones can spawn anywhere.

Edit: Hmmm I thought there were anyway, according to the mod viewer the ones I thought were u-w only (like the Throne of Water itself) are able to spawn anywhere.

Gridlocked fucked around with this message at 23:48 on May 4, 2017

Tagichatn
Jun 7, 2009

vyelkin posted:

Can thrones even spawn in underwater provinces though? It seems to me that even if there was an underwater player who was really difficult to uproot with poor land units, you could still win the game by just ignoring them.

As Gridlocked said, they can spawn underwater but this map has no UW thrones. Bad news for us, it would've been nice to have an easy throne!

Also here is the map:


Oceania in light green, Atlantis in light blue and Pelagia in pink. If you're thinking Pelagia is in a bad position, you're right! There's basically nothing that can save Pelagia at this point. My economy is so overpowering he can't fight me on his own and I have NAP with Atlantis. No land nation is going to give a poo poo about helping an UW nation so yeah, Pelagia is done for. Atlantis is probably aware of this and should be preparing for a war with me.

koolkevz666
Aug 22, 2015

Tagichatn posted:

As Gridlocked said, they can spawn underwater but this map has no UW thrones. Bad news for us, it would've been nice to have an easy throne!

Also here is the map:


Oceania in light green, Atlantis in light blue and Pelagia in pink. If you're thinking Pelagia is in a bad position, you're right! There's basically nothing that can save Pelagia at this point. My economy is so overpowering he can't fight me on his own and I have NAP with Atlantis. No land nation is going to give a poo poo about helping an UW nation so yeah, Pelagia is done for. Atlantis is probably aware of this and should be preparing for a war with me.

You must stop Atlantis from expanding purely so their territory remains in the shape of a fish.

Tagichatn
Jun 7, 2009

I actually left a corridor for him to attack Pelagia like an actual good ally that isn't planning on backstabbing someone but he didn't take it. If Pelagia had been a tough opponent, I would've wanted the help but so far there's been little resistance. Maybe Atlantis was counting on Pelagia to put up a good fight while he expanded on land, I dunno.

How are u
May 19, 2005

by Azathoth

Tagichatn posted:

I actually left a corridor for him to attack Pelagia like an actual good ally that isn't planning on backstabbing someone but he didn't take it. If Pelagia had been a tough opponent, I would've wanted the help but so far there's been little resistance. Maybe Atlantis was counting on Pelagia to put up a good fight while he expanded on land, I dunno.

That's almost 100% certainly what he was hoping for. Unfortunately Pelagia took a huge poo poo on himself and now Atlantis has to face a much larger you on his own.

Corbeau
Sep 13, 2010

Jack of All Trades
This is probably around the time that I, as Vanarus, started getting diplo messages from Atlantis...

Tagichatn
Jun 7, 2009

Corbeau posted:

This is probably around the time that I, as Vanarus, started getting diplo messages from Atlantis...

Hah! I assume you told him to pound sand?

Turn 18


Another boring turn, sorry!


More sea lions and we easily take a province from indies. Atlantis doesn’t seem to be moving down so I’m taking the indies to the east of Pelagia.


You can see the situation here.


Atlantis’ holdings are here. Worryingly close to our cap but some new information has come to light!

Another player grabbed a throne or site or something that lets him view score graphs. Turns out Marignon is running away with the game. They have the most provinces, roughly tied with Asphodel and way more income than anyone else, like almost twice as much. Yours truly is a distant second in income but followed closely by Pan. The good news is that we have quite a bit more income and provinces than Atlantis so we should be in good shape for the upcoming war. edit: Unfortunately I didn't save the link to the graphs, I believe it was Abysia who had the site.


The first 40 satyrs are done and awaiting a commander, I’m not sure how many of these stealth armies I’m going to make but at least two.


Another army is done and ready to go attack that adjacent throne. Marignon is also moving that way and I’m assuming they will attack it. The army has 10 knights of the chalice which are really beastly, I don’t have any chaff to absorb hits so hopefully centaur’s defence will avoid some of the lance charges.

Every fort is building more dudes and we have a siren building a lab in the fort that was missing one. All of our commanders require a lab, some require a temple so I’m probably going to prioritize those labs in the future. I built a few amphibious scouts from the that one before it got a lab so it wasn’t wasting a ton of commander build turns at least.


The army that took Grandfather is moving on another indie province. I’m surprised Atlantis isn’t even pretending to be interested, he hasn’t taken those adjacent provinces and I don’t think he ever even fought Pelagia. That’s fine, we had no trouble with Pelagia so it’s more provinces for us. Still, I have no idea when Pelagia’s fort will fall. I do have a mage building temples nearby so maybe we will be able to do the domkill eventually.

Join us next turn for our first throne battle!

PurpleXVI
Oct 30, 2011

Spewing insults, pissing off all your neighbors, betraying your allies, backing out of treaties and accords, and generally screwing over the global environment?
ALL PART OF MY BRILLIANT STRATEGY!
Am I remembering wrong or doesn't Marignon have some okay aquatic/amphibious units?

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goatface
Dec 5, 2007

I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.


Grimey Drawer
Marignon is Spanish Inquisition/conquistadors. They sail rather than swim.

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