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Jun 11, 2024 20:20
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- PHIZ KALIFA
- Dec 21, 2011
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#mood
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Without pubics y'all are just Terrified Asexual Fuckmeats and will be chowed on by hounds
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May 8, 2017 06:23
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- Anony Mouse
- Jan 30, 2005
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A name means nothing on the battlefield. After a week, no one has a name.
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Lipstick Apathy
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Boyfriend [23M] said something kind of off-putting to me[21F]? How to express that it made me uncomfortable without sounding too "sensitive" and "triggered"?
quote:Hey all,
So my boyfriend is sort of a self-proclaimed alpha, as you will. Sometimes he'll say "I ain't no beta" when something 'threatens his masculinity' I guess. It's very strange because he doesn't really have the gym bro tough typical alpha-male personality going on, he's actually a very very sweet person.
A few hours ago, a close male friend of mine messaged me asking about a big surprise he planned for this girl he just started dating. It was a very sweet and thoughtful surprise, and my boyfriend saw me messaging him and asked what we were talking about. I told him about my friend's surprise and how I was helping him plan out some of the specifics of it and my boyfriend said "Wow, this guy sounds really beta LOL". I said Umm not really, he's just being sweet and caring. My boyfriend asked if my friend was like him, and I said well yeah sort of I guess? You guys are both very large in size and are sometimes sentimental. My boyfriend then says "Welll I aint no beta LOL so nah we're not alike" and at this point i didn't really know what to say so I remained quiet. A few minutes later, my boyfriend then says I BANG YOU and I was like um okay? Where did that come from LOL and he says idk and starts talking about something irrelevant. He says the I BANG YOU thing again so I ask him about it and he says oh yeah I bang you because I'm alpha.
Is it wrong of me to feel kind of turned off by this? Something about this just makes me cringe. I don't know how tobring this up to him as I kind of just went along with the conversation since it diverted to a different topic, I feel like if I bring this up and say "Hey what you said earlier bugged me a bit" He would just say "LOL it's just a joke man, dont be so sensitive" or "Oh sorry I guess I shouldn't joke, can't trigger you".
tl;dr: Bf told me he bangs me because he's alpha, I don't know how to tell him that this makes me feel kinda weird and turned off without me potentially being too oversensitive.
Edit:
My (25F) friends (29F) boyfriend (23M) duped me into thinking it was 'okay' to sleep with him because the girlfriend wanted us to 'try out' for a threesome in the future. I slept with him, and I found out that he was lying, and now I have no clue what to do.
quote:I feel so dumb. So, so loving dumb and angry and upset inside, I literally cannot believe this.
One of my friends, not a particularly good friend but still a friend I've known for 4 years, has this boyfriend. He is a very sexy man, I wont deny it, he always has been, kind of hunky and I think Italian or something. I saw him at a party, I hadn't seen him or his girlfriend for like 8 months, and he right away came up to me and started flirting with me and stuff. He had definitely been working out a lot since the last I saw him, he was shirtless at the party. He was flirty, then he sort of left and went to the otherside of the party.
Near the end of the party he came up to me and we were both super drunk, it was like 4am. He came up and said he had a proposition, and he showed me 'texts' from Sadie, his GF. The texts were about a threesome, and it was basically this
"Hey babe i just saw kate at the party"
"oh hey! you know, she would be a perfect contender for our threesome. Ask her if she would be interested. I want you to try out with her that night before we do it though so its not weird when we are first together"
And he agreed. It was a lot more than that, but whatever. I saw those texts and just giggled and thought it was funny. It was 4am, but I still tried calling Sadie to be like YOU WANNA THREESOME, THATS SO AWESOME. i didnt even comprehend the idea that these texts could possibly be fake.
I asked the boyfriend, he said they have had an open relationship for a while. We both got flirty, I was feeling him up a bit all drunk and poo poo. We then just went to the bedroom and had sex, but not only that, we had like, really really ridiculously good sex. I feel like ive only had sex with kind of ugly nerdy fat or super skinny guys so to have this hunk dark tall handsome guy take me away was like pure bliss.
I left the party in the morning, having basically slept in his arms. He must have passed out. I woke up, he woke up, and I was like "okay, I'm gonna call sadie and see when she would want to meet up, im super excited" and suddenly he got SUPER SERIOUS and told me I cant do that, he kept on stuttering his words and poo poo. I was like ummm... what is going on. I kept trying to get the truth but he made these lame rear end excuses, then he just came forward with the truth. He made up those text messages, he typed them to himself and deleted the duplicates. He was on molly, and he desperately wanted someone to gently caress, and I seemed to flirt with him so he made up that excuse without thinking of the consequences.
I got furious honestly. He tricked me into betraying my friend. I went downstairs and just cried and cooked eggs at the hosts house and complained to these random girls and they were sympathetic. After like 2 hours I went upstairs to go yell at him more... and I FIND HIM GETTING A HANDJOB FROM SOME RANDOM GIRL. I was just so disgusted. A year and a half relationship with Sadie, and he cheats on her twice in one day at a party.
Anyways, Idk what the gently caress to do now. Im home and i just feel sick and guilty. Not sure what to do. I know I gotta tell Sadie but my excuse is going to sound so horrible. Ugh, what do i do?
tl;dr: Guy tricked me into thinking it was okay to sleep with him and that his Gf wouldnt get mad, but it wasnt okay. Not sure what to do. 
Reddit comments are as expected:
quote:It honestly sounds like you're just trying to justify making a mistake. No matter what he said if she was your friend you should have cleared it with her first. You made a huge mistake and you can apologize to her and explain what happened but you have to be prepared to accept the consequences if your actions. quote:You should feel dumb. You hosed this dude on his word without even speaking directly to his girlfriend, who happens to be your friend. All of this comes across like you trying to shift the majority of the blame on to him for being deceitful when you were wilfully ignorant because you were attracted to him. Anony Mouse fucked around with this message at 06:54 on May 8, 2017
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May 8, 2017 06:43
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- Fartbox
- Apr 27, 2017
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What's happening? Dri fu an only two? what is this?
Is this an avatar? I don't know rm dunk
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Do your balls seriously stink so bad you need deodorant on them?
Man check your diet or health or something that aint right
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May 8, 2017 07:12
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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Hmm, men are bad.
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May 8, 2017 07:15
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- CharlestheHammer
- Jun 26, 2011
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YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!
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Lol of course you would take that angle.
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May 8, 2017 07:43
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- Improbable Lobster
- Jan 6, 2012
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"From each according to his ability" said Ares. It sounded like a quotation.
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Buglord
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Balls are good
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May 8, 2017 07:55
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- NomChompsky
- Sep 17, 2008
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Whoa touting out the old "men are bad" about gay men who gently caress someone over? This makes you some kinda CIS LORD GENDER TYRANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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May 8, 2017 08:42
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- GRINDCORE MEGGIDO
- Feb 28, 1985
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Better hope mother doesn't bring her shiv home.
quote:
Log in / Register
r/relationshipsRelationships
My (22F) mother (40F) has been in jail now for half a year and I have started a sexual relationship with her boyfriend (32M). This feels so loving dirty and bad, but I feel like feelings are developing and its tearing me apart.
u/keninmanboy
My mom is in jail, she will be for another year and a half. Her boyfriend, who moved in with us literally 4 weeks before she went to jail, was just the sweetest guy. He said we can split the rent between me and him, and we can be like roommates just until she comes back. At first I thought it was weird, but then i realized it was an offer to me, i wouldnt be able to afford rent without him.
So we lived together for a few months. But the thing is, he is hot. He is a rugged, muscular, hairy, sexy greek man. I knew this when I first saw him but living with him was completely different, he walked around the apartment with only his boxers on, he worked out in the living room with his underwear on (apparently near-nudity is more common in greece lol) and I could see his... you know what through his ridiculous bulge. I dont think his intentions were to tempt me, but jesus loving christ, every day I started thinking about how much I wanted him. I was a virgin, by the way, not 100% relevant but probably a bit.
Then one day, he was walking by in only his underwear and he kind of squished near me in the kitchen and our bodies got REAL close to each other and we just kind of stopped and stared at each other, and then he said "look, i cant do this, you know why" and I just said "yeah, yeah I know" but we still ended up making out. I just pulled his pants down and he slid it in, pretty much right then and there. It blew me away. It was like months of sexual tension released inside of me when he came.
Its been a week since then. I have butterflies in my stomach from nervousness and also from him in general. Every night he comes and we have sex pretty much all day, we barely even talk about anything else.
Until just now, maybe 3 hours ago. He said he has been fighting with my mom, and my heart just dropped, I barely even thought of her. He hadnt been seeing her, he said this before we had sex. Me and my mom... we really do not get along. She is an on and off pill addict, which is why she went to jail. But now, this whole situation. I feel like I am honestly kind of in love with this man. I can feel it. We have been roommates and such good friends for the past few months and now we are having sex and it is the greatest week of my life. He is so handsome and hunky and just beautiful to look at, but also extremely humble and sweet, he wouldnt ever hurt a fly, he is always thinking about other people. I literally feel amazing in his arms.
Anyways, what the gently caress do I do? This is so so weird. I dont know how to tell this to my mom.
tl;dr: Im sleeping with my moms boyfriend
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May 8, 2017 08:54
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- Rough Lobster
- May 27, 2009
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Don't be such a squid, bro
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Do your balls seriously stink so bad you need deodorant on them?
Man check your diet or health or something that aint right
It's entirely possible that he has some kinda fungal infection on his nut bag. Athlete's scrote.
Stinky sack guy you should probably go to the doctor and get some anti fungal medication. If you're poor just nuke your nuts with UV outside for a few hours and then blast them with steam to scald and kill any hangers on. Good luck and myself and many others in this thread wish you a speedy recovery.
Be sure to hit the taint too it's probably in bad condition.
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May 8, 2017 09:13
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- wak
- May 8, 2017
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D U C K F A L E S .
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Pillbug
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Today in Redditors Need Help With Everything:
Me [22M] with my ExGf [21F] of two 2 years. We broke up yesterday but she kept my video game platform with games included. How can I ask for them back.Breakups (self.relationships)
quote:submitted 8 months ago by great_white_wolf
So my ex gf just broke up with me yesterday and I'll spare you the details since that isn't relevant. You can crack a joke if you want but I just want some general advise as whats the best course of action.
Heres the issue. About a month or so ago I lend her my Nintendo DS with all my games and honestly I am a Pokémon fan and have been dying for this new Pokémon game releasing in 2 months. So now she decided to break up with me and didn't even bother giving me my poo poo back. I don't want to have to spend a good 250dlls for the DS plus game. How can I approach the situation to recover what is rightfully mine? or should I just let things be the way they are.
Mind you the break up wasn't dramatic with screaming and what not, so its not like we cant see each other again since we didn't end up on a bad note, on the contrary we talked like normal people and she decided to end it.
tl;dr: GF kept my Nintendo DS after break up. How can I recover it or should I even attempt to?
Because asking for your stuff back is "insensitive" sorry, "incensitive".
OP posted:No my friend. Its not that i am weak or have no spine. Me being an incensitive prick is what got me broken up with in the first place. Was only exploring my options since i am done hurting her feelings. OP posted:Yes I know thanks for your opinion guys. This is in fact the most conventional way of handling getting your stuff back, simply asking for them. I guess i thought there was another more subtle way since im done being branded as an "incensitive rear end in a top hat" but no matter. it is what it is
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May 8, 2017 09:28
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- blarzgh
- Apr 14, 2009
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SNITCHIN' RANDY
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Grimey Drawer
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quote:
My (25F) friends (29F) boyfriend (23M) duped me into thinking it was 'okay' to sleep with him because the girlfriend wanted us to 'try out' for a threesome in the future.
Quote:
My (22F) mother (40F) has been in jail now for half a year and I have started a sexual relationship with her boyfriend (32M).
You can clearly tell the male authors of these posts were jacking themselves off furiously while writing them.
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May 8, 2017 12:58
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- PHIZ KALIFA
- Dec 21, 2011
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#mood
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I thought the ethnicities were interesting details to include.
thats a thing white women do a lot. like i knew this one woman who spent a week bragging about her mixed race boyfriend, only to find out that he was freckle-alabaster white with a massive mop of frizzy red hair. dude had so much privilege that he actually refused a race-based scholarship he otherwise would have been eminently qualified for. He brought in a family photo album so the leaders of the black student union would let them hang out in their lounge.
also he was a pagan poly LARPer STEM jackass so like just goes to show you how farcical white culture is
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May 8, 2017 14:13
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- PHIZ KALIFA
- Dec 21, 2011
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#mood
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well if pins are on the table, moxibustion ur taint to correct the chi flow through ur boipussy so you don't got Stank Hairs growing sideways and giving Tom Green a humor-tumor.
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May 8, 2017 16:27
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- Pvt.Scott
- Feb 16, 2007
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What God wants, God gets, God help us all
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I actually prefer supergluing my scrote to my thighs to keep both of my hands available for the ball shave. Pain-free instant skin bonding is the way to go. When you're done, just walk briskly for an invigorating shock followed by an endorphin rush.
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May 8, 2017 16:39
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- Buzkashi
- Feb 4, 2003
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College Slice
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My[18F] boyfriend [23M] of 4 months has serious mommy issues and I don't know what to do.Relationships
quote:
Okay so down to the basics:
I am an 18 year old girl who recently started dating, hands down the best boyfriend I could ever ask for. He's caring and understanding and accepts me and all my faults. I could not ask for someone better. We always talk and work out problems as soon as they arise and I really cannot think of one bad moment.
So one reason we click so well is because we had similar problems growing up and parental situations. We both lived with our moms after our parents divorced (they were both ugly) and they had to raise two kids. The difference is (although my mom was not fantastic) my mom was a mom. She cared for me how she should, never burdened me with our financial issues, did her best to hide any troubles so my sister and I could be care free growing up and his did the exact opposite. He has told me stories that make my blood boil.
His mother constantly broke down and told them they were a few bills away from being homeless. When his parents were divorcing she never stopped crying and was a mess, she never put them first and when she finally got a boyfriend she would spend weeks with him on end and leave him to take care of his brother (he was about 11 when they got together). Now that she knows she's done wrong she's trying to do better. She gives him money now and then since her boyfriend is loaded and texts him cute things every now and then. He tells me she is trying to "patch up" their relationship after all those years and he is accepting of it but I can tell he's still hurt.
Anyway, he's told me from the bat he has abandonment issues, (His dad left them for one of his college students when he was around 7 and life has been down hill from there.) but things have gotten to a new point. So he told me he had in the past skimmed through porn including "mommy and son" out of curiousity and what not and although I told him I was in no way into anything like that he said he was not interested anyway. Soon after he did ask to call me mommy like two or three times while doing more vulnerable acts on him and I don't know....it seemed...not sexual? Like more of a nurture than desire need was fulfilled.
Fast forward to last week, he had a bad day at work and out of nowhere he broke down. Of course I consoled him while he cried and next thing I know I'm cradling him like a mother would. He was curled up on me (there is a drastic size distance between us) and crying. Of course that did not necessarily bother me but I found it strange.
It really hit me that there was an issue though yesterday. He was trying to nap but couldn't and asked me to lay down with him. That was completely fine, I do the same. I found myself sneaking away from him like a mother leaving her child when he was sleeping and 5 minutes later he was calling for me. When I came back he started to cry, something about pent up stress and anxiety that never gets released because he has always had to push it down inside, he always had to be strong for everyone else. That broke my heart. Long story short I was cradling him again. His head was on my chest and legs were over mine as i ran my fingers through his hair. Then he asked me if he could suck on my nipple. In the moment, I thought it was a little weird but everything really made sense.He has serious mommy issues. Soon he wanted to be called a "good boy" and wanted me to tell him "good things."
This is serious. I knew things with him and his parents were strained but not to this extent and I don't know how to help him or what to do. I do not know if I should encourage the behavior or push him to go to therapy ( but he does not have the time) or have him talk to his mom. Does he want a mommy figure? Is it only gonna get worse?
TL;DR- my boyfriend has serious mommy issues and I do not know what to do, what he's looking for, and if it's going to get worse from here.
-just screaming-
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May 8, 2017 16:55
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- Pvt.Scott
- Feb 16, 2007
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What God wants, God gets, God help us all
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Pinning your scrote to the counter? Goddamn you people are sick.
I just burn the hair off with a blow torch and then scrape with a wire brush. It much faster.
Pfft. I bet you're one of those luddites that uses a straight razor and a lather brush for an "authentic" experience. Get with the times, grandpa.
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May 8, 2017 17:04
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- wak
- May 8, 2017
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D U C K F A L E S .
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Pillbug
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Me [28 M] with my Sister[26 F] whom I've been close to all my life. Found out something very disturbing today.Personal issues (self.relationships)
quote:submitted 1 year ago by DistressedBrother22
Throwaway because our mutual friends use Reddit. She does not.
My sister and I have been best friends since we were little. We've been pretty much inseparable for as long as I can remember. Our parents always said they were thrilled that we got along so well. We almost always had dogs as well. German Shepherds. This is important later.
My sister (Samantha) and I live together. We have a small home in the Midwest. Neither of us are in a relationship with anyone so it works out very well. We have a large group of friends but we are still each others best friend. We have two German Shepherds, Willie and Bullit.
Recently Sammy's computer bit the dust. We've ordered a new computer but it's not ready yet so she's been using mine. I mainly use my computer for gaming or tablet drawing and she usually used hers for writing.
Here's where things get weird though. I keep all my game changes and mod in a main folder and each game has their own folder. I got the urge to play Deus Ex again so I went through my Deus Ex folder and saw a folder I don't remember naming. I opened it up and it was full of text documents. I opened one of the documents and it was a short story.
I know Reddit knows about MLP and bronies. But I discovered there's another spin-off of the franchise called Fluffy Ponies. According to their wiki, they're bio toys made by a company to capitalize on MLP. The disturbing thing is that there's a huge following of people who write or draw these things suffering horrible abuse. And my sister is one of them.
The opening up my internet browser and searched history and started opening things related to fluffies. They have a main website that is full of drawings and stories of horrific abuse. Killing them, turning them into food while alive, ripping off limbs, torture, it's awful. And Sammy contributes to this site!
I've known her all my life and I never saw this side of her. We shared a room back at home and now we share a house and I never, ever, ever suspected something like this. Throughout our entire lives, we've had animals, mainly German Shepherds. They've never acted like they were abuse or anything by her. There was never any mysterious injuries and the dogs always loved her. They never acted afraid of her so I'm fairly certain she's never abused them.
Sammy is asleep on the couch right now and Willie and Bullit are sleeping on the floor right next to her. It's obvious that they love her and are not afraid of her.
But Reddit, I feel sick to my stomach. I've always been an animal lover too. I know these fluffy things aren't real but the fact that she wrote gratuitously violent stories about torturing them is extremely disturbing to me. I feel like I know longer really know who she is as a person.
I confided in her closest female friend who also is a writer and loves to write fan-fiction. She knew Samantha wrote these things because she writes stories about it too. When she saw how I reacted, she said that it was a harmless power fantasy. But she swore she wouldn't mention to Sammy that I know because I want to be the one to confront her about it.
I'm worried for my dogs safety now. What should I do Reddit? I could move out but apartments nearby do not allow pets over 30lbs. That would mean the dogs were left behind with her.
What should I do Reddit? Has anyone else had something like this happen? Do any of you participate in this fandom or know someone who does? Are they good people otherwise?
Thank you in advance for the help.
tl;dr: Found out my sister writes animal abuse fiction short stories. Feel like I don't know who she is anymore.
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May 8, 2017 17:19
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- FormerPoster
- Aug 5, 2004
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Hair Elf
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My[18F] boyfriend [23M] of 4 months has serious mommy issues and I don't know what to do.Relationships
-just screaming-
When the first thing you can say about why you're with someone is that 'he accepts me for all my faults', this is a sign that you don't have high enough self-esteem to be in a relationship.
Me [28 M] with my Sister[26 F] whom I've been close to all my life. Found out something very disturbing today.Personal issues (self.relationships)
I don't know why it surprises me that this kind of thing exists, but it does.
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May 8, 2017 17:20
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Jun 11, 2024 20:20
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- Nazzadan
- Jun 22, 2016
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The mother(heh) of all age gap stories
I[23m] am talking to a [16f] with a 5 month old. Is it worth the time?
quote:Bit of clarification: we've been dating for just shy of 6 months. Not very long, I know... Also, the age of consent in my state is 16 with no age gap stipulation.
Its been extremely hard to bring myself to ask others about this because just from the title alone, people will instantly make a judgement. Obviously she was irresponsible at one point in time and she's quite a bit younger than me, but just hear me out. Just to put it out there, my parents started dating when my mother was 17 and my father 27. They've maintained a successful and happy marriage for over a quarter of a century and raised 3 kids.
Several months ago, I hit it off with a waffle house waitress (stick with me). I thought we were around the same age until she mentioned having a 5 month old child. She says she was in a relationship with a 19 year old guy who jumped ship when he found out she was pregnant. They didn't necessarily plan to have children, but after a certain amount of time, they stop using contraception. They were both stupid to do that but she felt like they were in a stable relationship.
I have stable work with great pay. I could easily provide for her and her child, but I'm afraid of being used. I also don't want to waste time and resources on someone who will just move on when she gets bored or finds something she likes better. She's still living at home and is still financially supported by her parents for the most part. She's not a party girl, a drinker or a drug addict.
I'm only 23, but I've had more than my fill of dating drama and I'm ready to settle down and build a life with someone.
Is our age gap going to present challenges that we won't be able to overcome?
Other than straight up having the conversaion, how can I tell if she's not ready to settle in the same way I am?
TL;DR 23/m dating 16/f with 5 month old. I'm ready to settle but I'm not sure if she is. I'm also afraid our age gap will cause too many issues
edit I'll check out any additional responses in the morning. For now, I'm going to take a good hard look at the current state of things and try to figure out what's best for both of us. Thanks to everyone who took the time to help me out. Maybe it'll work out, maybe it won't, but I'm going to be as careful as I can while I try to figure out the right move.
I haven't actually had a serious talk with her yet. I wanted to sort of get external opinions on the situation. While most of the feedback has suggested that I not pursue this, I'm going to figure it out for sure in the near future.
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May 8, 2017 17:25
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May 8, 2017 05:06
. Women have it so easy!
