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Jun 11, 2024 19:22
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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I wasn't offering an opinion on the story, just information about what criteria are used.
After reading your post, the thought of having to deal with that at the office made me too naseuous to not post.
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May 10, 2017 16:47
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- Pelvic Floor Wax
- Jul 21, 2007
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Drug coverage can vary by province, and if the treatment plan is for oral chemo, it might be covered only through individual drug insurance plans. Not everyone is on those, and out of pocket can cost up to $8,000/month for drugs. Even if you have coverage, you're wading through deductibles, percent of prescription not covered, etc. Lost of plans cover 80%, but with a $8,000/month drug, that's still $1,600 out of pocket.
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May 10, 2017 17:00
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- Blue Train
- Jun 17, 2012
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Drug coverage can vary by province, and if the treatment plan is for oral chemo, it might be covered only through individual drug insurance plans. Not everyone is on those, and out of pocket can cost up to $8,000/month for drugs. Even if you have coverage, you're wading through deductibles, percent of prescription not covered, etc. Lost of plans cover 80%, but with a $8,000/month drug, that's still $1,600 out of pocket.
drat that's rough
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May 10, 2017 17:01
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- Bubblyblubber
- Nov 17, 2014
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A Tale Of Two Fake As gently caress Strawmen
On the red corner, we have Triggered Tammy!
My (24F) best friend (24F) who is your typical tumblrite was having a bad day and been in a bad way for a few months, my bf (25M) complimented her because she seemed down, she exploded on him in public, how do I approach letting her know this was not freaking appropriate/what do I do?
quote:
376 points 124 comments submitted 1 year ago by explodeouttanowhere to r/relationships
Let me describe my best friend of 9 years, short, a bit more flesh on her than is healthy, cropped hair with blue/green streaks, nose piercing. She doesn't work, lives at her parents and spends days upon days on tumblr. Recently her long distance bf broke up with her and she has basically turned into a 'feminazi' I believe it's called. Her entire fb/tumblr is full of hate for males. I've done my best to ignore this even though at times she's sort of been pushy for me to break it off with my bf for some reason or other, saying things like we need to stick together and you don't need him. Of course I don't but I chose him because he's a wonderful person.
Anyway, my bf as I've said is fantastic, he's a kind charming sweet guy, my best friend called him a 'beta male' and it took so much not to lose my poo poo. The other day the three of us were at the mall getting lunch, she was there with her mother, my bf and I who work a couple streets away from each other decided to meet her for lunch, it was more my idea as I know how she's been very passive aggressive towards him, but he was hungry and wanted to go pick up the new justice league comic after eating, so he came too.
Anyway, best friend is texting me letting know her mom is on her rear end for not attempting to get a job again, she seems to view her mom as being terrible for this, when in reality mom wanting her daughter to get a job and provide income for herself is good parenting, she just wants her daughter to work for her own cash.
Anyway we meet up in the food court and my best friend is steaming mad, I can tell she's more than annoyed at seeing my bf, he brushes it off. This is the first time he's seen her hair since she dyed it from it's previous red, he says 'Alice (not her real name) your hair looks really cool and you look nice today' intending it as a compliment, I think he thought it might cheer her up a bit, given that her bad mood was pretty palpable.
She explodes into some loud freakin rant about why the gently caress is he talking to her and she doesn't need him to loving make her feel nice and that he should know his boundaries. Cue bf and my shocked faces. She then just loving starts yelling some poo poo about me being with him out of pity and how he's loving terrible in bed and that a girl like me deserves way better (I am an average looking woman, I'd get a 5.5 or maybe a 6.5 if I was on rateme so I dunno what was up with her) (he's not bad in bed either, but she and I have never really talked about my sex life) and keep in mind, this is in the middle of the food court at a mall with A LOT of people around. My bf just gets really clammy and I can tell he's utterly loving humiliated, he just says yeah I'll head back now and walks off, I'm in shock, as my bf is walking off, I'm still there in shock while some people are outright laughing at him or just looking really mortified, 'best friend' starts realizing holy poo poo, what the gently caress happened? I storm off, she's blown up my phone all weekend, I've talked to my bf about it and let him know none of what she said was true, however that doesn't change the fact he's still really humiliated, a couple co workers of his were at the food court as well.
I don't know what to do, how do I help my bf get past this, what do I do about my so called 'best friend'
TL;DR tumblrite best friend is on a man hating spree, was having a bad day, lost her poo poo and humiliated my bf in public when he complimented her thinking it might help with her having a bad day, what do I do?
And on the blue corner, Jesus loving Christ Steve, what is your damage?
Husband (m29) reveals a shocking opinion on rape which results in big argument. How can I (f30) work past this?
quote:219 points 415 comments submitted 4 years ago by triggerthrow1 to r/relationships
m29, f30 married 2 yrs, going out 2 yrs before.
I've just had a very intense argument with my husband of 2 years. My heart is pounding as I write this.
Basically there was an article in today's paper. The article was about a man who came home early to find his wife in bed with a neighbour. So the man goes back out, gets a couple of his friends/neighbours and they drag the couple out. They beat the man up. The husband takes his wife outside on the street where a crowd has gathered, and in the words of the article "had public sex with her" as all and sundry watched and she cried. In between the raping, he also took the time to slap her around.
Now, I was as horrified as I'm sure many of you are. I conveyed this to my hubby and was shocked at his reply. He basically was of the opinion that the husband did nothing wrong. He had a right to punish his wife for cheating on him. He said that because the wife publicly humiliated him he had a right to do the same. He did not even agree that it was rape, because they are married. The one thing he concedes is that he shouldn't have hit her.
Note, we live in a non-western culture that is institutionally sexist and concepts such as marital-rape have not sunk in here. My husband is a product of being raised in this culture while I have had the privilege of studying overseas. My husband has also been cheated on and it really affected him. But common sense and basic human empathy should make it clear that the husband in the story was wrong wrong wrong. I'm shocked and horrified by my husband's opinion and it's really starting to change how I look at him. We argued for a long while, and then he basically shut down because I was "overreacting" - I started crying and shaking because it really struck a nerve with me.
I don't want to have another argument but I really can't be content to think that my husband really thinks this way. Do I bring it up again? What can I do to change his mind? If he doesn't change his mind, wtf does that mean for us?
TLDR: We read newspaper article describing incident with violence and rape and husband thinks there's nothing wrong. I'm horrified and shocked. What can I do?
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May 10, 2017 17:11
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- Pvt.Scott
- Feb 16, 2007
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What God wants, God gets, God help us all
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I know when the husband walks in on me and leaves I just hang around to see what'll happen next
The wife and her lover might not have noticed him if the husband didn't say anything and went out to round up the posse before having the confrontation.
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May 10, 2017 17:35
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- dudeness
- Mar 5, 2010
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 Cat Army
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Fallen Rib
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[38F]. Winning husband. Is this a gambling problem?
quote:Despite the title of this, it has nothing to do with winning my husband back, or cheating. I'm 38, with a 21-year-old daughter and 15-year-old son, and married. We live in Yorkshire, England. My husband has recently had several small wins, first on the National Lottery (once!), then a few times on the slot machines. Now he's taken it a step further by going out playing poker several times a week, and taking our son to casinos and gambling arcades in the next big city down the road. I think it's what kicked off this 'interest'. I don't like it one bit, and have told him this explicitly, but he insists "It's all in a good game, bit of fun".
I never really gambled, but have no issues with others doing it.
I was furious when I overheard him on the phone to a friend admitting he'd pretended our son was 19 to get into a gambling arcade that bans under-18s - he got him to pretend to be 19!
My son and his dad have always had a good father-son bond, but this takes it too far, it's more like they're best mates than father and son!
Now our son's spending all his time thinking about gambling when not at school, and my husband's encouraging it. FFS, they even go online gambling together!
I don't know what to do for the best, divorce seems like a cheap way out, and this seems way out-of-character for my husband, is it a midlife crisis, or a new hobby?
We're less intimate than we used to be, which saddens me; he plays poker online in bed and even sent a photo of himself posing in his pants with poker chips to a man in Canada online; he claimed it was "a joke email".
What should I do about this, and his increased obsession with gambling?
I'll be honest, I think this is a phase, but if so, how should I handle this situation, ride it out, or get counselling?
I'm already worried about the financial impact of their 'hobby'.
My apologies if this is long, but I need help!
tl;dr: Husband obsessed with gambling, could it become an addiction?
quote:
I did try and discuss the gambling, but he insisted "There's nothing wrong with gambling. You need to chill, babe.".
Even worse... when he sent the man in Canada the picture of himself posing in his pants with poker chips, he'd arranged to meet him online, and the Canadian is coming to our house on Monday, which shocks me, he told me it this morning, he told me "Like it or lump it, he's coming, wear your hoochie clothes for him."
My husband's not thick, but not a genius, average intelligence, really.
quote:What should I do now that his Internet friend (the man in Canada) is coming to our house - he gave him our address and phone number? He told me the Canadian guy is coming this Monday.
No updates after that, i can only guess Canadian Man killed them and is wearing their skin as hoochie clothes.
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May 10, 2017 17:43
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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[38F]. Winning husband. Is this a gambling problem?
Somebody was promised to gently caress that Canada man, and he collected.
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May 10, 2017 17:53
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- Nancy
- Nov 23, 2005
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Young Orc
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Me [24 M] with my friend [20 M] 1 yr, friend was hypnotized by a man he met on Scruff, scared
quote:
One of my best friends just texted me and said he met a guy on Scruff and they decided to skype. The man was a hypnotherapist who said that he worked at my university (I can't find one that does). The text conversation went like this:
Friend: "Wtf I was just hypnotised"
Me: "Is that good or bad?"
Friend: I'm not sure. Master lives in T-town"
Me: "Do you need anything? And who is Master?"
Friend: "I must trust, submit and obey master"
Me: "Are you OK?"
Friend: "I'm good. Master is helping me focus with school."
Me: "Are you sure you are OK?"
Friend: "Yeah, I'm good"
Me: "Ok...so what is going on? What is it for? Who did it?
Friend: "I just got hypnotized by some guy who was on Scruff. Wtf. He is a professor."
Me: "Like actually hypnotized, or figuratively"
Friend: "Actually"
Me: "What did he do? Did he make you do anything?"
Friend: "I don't remember. I just got hypnotized. But I do remember that he's helping me do good in school. Helping me focus."
Me: "Please be careful, this sounds potentially really exploitative."
Friend: "Literally wtf just happened. Yah, for some reason I want to see him. Wtf. Why?"
Me: "Can I call you?"
Friend: "Yah, I gave him my phone number Wtffff IDK why. He hypnotized me."
I talked to him on the phone and told him to talk to his friends and that I didn't like what happened and I was worried...and to call me if he ever communicates with that guy. Then I said I trusted his judgement but that I was just really worried. I don't know what to do. I really care about my friend, I don't know where to go for help.
tl;dr: My friend got hypnotized by guy on a sex hookup app, I'm really scared and I don't know what to do. I signed up for the app and said I was looking for a hypnotist to try to find the guy. I'm so scared, please help...
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May 10, 2017 17:57
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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Just like Hugh did, right??
I never thought Hugh loved me.
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May 10, 2017 17:59
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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Me [24 M] with my friend [20 M] 1 yr, friend was hypnotized by a man he met on Scruff, scared
How do you get to be 24 years old and not realize everyone is laughing at you, always.
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May 10, 2017 17:59
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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How do you get to be 24 years old and not realize everyone is laughing at you, always.
I feel bad for incredibly stupid people
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May 10, 2017 18:01
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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Drug coverage can vary by province, and if the treatment plan is for oral chemo, it might be covered only through individual drug insurance plans. Not everyone is on those, and out of pocket can cost up to $8,000/month for drugs. Even if you have coverage, you're wading through deductibles, percent of prescription not covered, etc. Lost of plans cover 80%, but with a $8,000/month drug, that's still $1,600 out of pocket.
Still not enough money to be worth flipping out and nearly killing your wife over.
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May 10, 2017 18:11
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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What's a wife killing amount of money? For future reference.
1,000 drop shipped Dog Heelys
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May 10, 2017 18:26
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- Brainworm
- Mar 23, 2007
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...one of these--
As he hath spices of them all, not all,
For I dare so far free him--made him fear'd...
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Nap Ghost
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Even if he changed his mind about hating me and wanted to get together I would definitely want to set some ground rules.
This is the moment I decided to send every Pick post to my infant daughter's GMail account so that when she's fifteen we can review them the same way an Engineering class watches videos of a bridge collapse.
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May 10, 2017 18:35
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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What's a wife killing amount of money? For future reference.
If I recall correctly, the state department of transportation put a human life at $88,000, and I guess that would be an average, so maybe if this were a really substandard wife it could be less than that, but actually she seems like a pretty good wife (clearly literate, job-holding, hygienic.) Chemo is about six cycles, each less than a month but we'll round to a month, so using the aforementioned "bad health care" scenario of $1,600/mo, even rounded up for additional expenses to $2,000 per month, that's maxing at $12,000? Like get the gently caress out of here!
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May 10, 2017 18:46
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- christmas boots
- Oct 15, 2012
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To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
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Biscuit Hider
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What's a wife killing amount of money? For future reference.
We all deserve death if you think about it kinda
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May 10, 2017 18:49
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- Milotic
- Mar 4, 2009
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9CL apologist
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Slippery Tilde
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Me (31M) and my fiancé (29F) are getting married and decided not babies at the reception. My family is very upset over my nephew (1M) not being invited. How can I deal with them without making things worse?
quote:u/IntentionallyLost1
My lovely future wife and I are finally going to tie the knot this summer. We decided, due to limited seating at the reception, to implement a no baby policy. Many of our invitees have young babies and most have been understanding in our request, although some were upset.
My sister and her husband have a 1 year old son, Brad. Now, we love this little guy and he is even our ring bearer during the ceremony. Originally, she had said that husband's brother and his SO would watch him during the reception. However, when I brought it up again recently, she said she no longer felt comfortable with that arrangements because Brad cried last time he was with them and if he wasn't allowed to come, then she wouldn't go either.
Now this obviously upset me and my fiancé, and it was left as that for a couple of weeks now. Today I spoke with my dad, and he told me that my two sisters and mom have all been talking very negatively about our wedding and are all extremely upset that I would exclude a member of our family from the wedding.
The truth is I would be happy to have him invited to the reception, but it would feel hypocritical to say no babies to everyone and then allow only one. I also feel as though all three (sisters & mom) are not being very fair to us. I feel as though this is our day and our request is not unreasonable. I would like some outside perspective since I do not know how to deal with my family about this without becoming angry and further straining the relationship.
Tl;dr: No babies allowed at our wedding. My mom and sisters are super upset my nephew isn't invited. Do not know how to deal with them.
It's their wedding, but it's a bit weird asking him to the ceremony to be the ringbeater but not the reception.
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May 10, 2017 18:50
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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Maybe she was a pretty mediocre wife, driving the value down.
There's no way she's a lowest quartile wife. Like have you SEEN some of these wives.
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May 10, 2017 18:51
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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You cannot convince me that wife is worth less than an economy sedan.
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May 10, 2017 18:54
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- Blue Train
- Jun 17, 2012
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If I recall correctly, the state department of transportation put a human life at $88,000, and I guess that would be an average, so maybe if this were a really substandard wife it could be less than that, but actually she seems like a pretty good wife (clearly literate, job-holding, hygienic.) Chemo is about six cycles, each less than a month but we'll round to a month, so using the aforementioned "bad health care" scenario of $1,600/mo, even rounded up for additional expenses to $2,000 per month, that's maxing at $12,000? Like get the gently caress out of here!
You forgot the currency conversion tho
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May 10, 2017 18:55
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- christmas boots
- Oct 15, 2012
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To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
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Biscuit Hider
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Economy Sedans don't ask me why I slept at the office instead of coming home last night.
MAYBE THIS CONVERSATION SHOULD BE A CLUE CHRISTINE
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May 10, 2017 18:55
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- WampaLord
- Jan 14, 2010
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There's no way she's a lowest quartile wife. Like have you SEEN some of these wives.
We gotta start creating some futures for wives that bankers can slice up into AAA investments.
Someone get Wall Street on the phone.
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May 10, 2017 18:55
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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I went back and read the post. She's a six-figure wife. This guy's bonkers.
Yeah, like the closing costs on a wife like that are more than some Canadian chemo. Dude's clearly an idiot.
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May 10, 2017 18:56
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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Me (31M) and my fiancé (29F) are getting married and decided not babies at the reception. My family is very upset over my nephew (1M) not being invited. How can I deal with them without making things worse?
It's their wedding, but it's a bit weird asking him to the ceremony to be the ringbeater but not the reception.
Makes sense, the kid is a recovering alcoholic and he doesnt need more temptation.
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May 10, 2017 18:57
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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You forgot the currency conversion tho
My god, you're right, that's $8,750! Even worse!
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May 10, 2017 18:58
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- Milotic
- Mar 4, 2009
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9CL apologist
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Slippery Tilde
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Great username
Me [17F] with my Rabbi [60sM] I think he crossed a line/boundary and I am not sure how to proceed.
quote:u/jewcrew_throwaway
I began seeking conversion to Judaism about a year ago and quickly found my current congregation and met my Rabbi. I have now been officially working with him for about eight months and the studying portion of my conversion is already complete, the only thing left are a few rituals that are mostly a formality.
The Rabbi in question is the senior Rabbi (we'll call him Rabbi R), and there is only one other at my congregation who is the junior Rabbi. [40s/M] It is worth noting the senior Rabbi is the interim Rabbi for my congregation which means he is only the senior Rabbi for a few years until they find a permanent replacement.
Anyway, I recently celebrated a special occasion and Rabbi R wanted to take me out to lunch to celebrate. We have formed a close bond during the past 8 months as a conversion requires lots of close study with a Rabbi- so this didn't seem out of the ordinary to me. At lunch we begin talking about his wife, and I ask him what the secret is to a long and happy marriage. He quickly launches into talking about how compromise is important, etc. He then says "Well, I'm not sure how personal you want me to get." I, thinking he's going to tell me a sweet or heartwarming story or something of the like, say "Oh sure, go ahead."
Boy, did I regret that.
He then launches into a long-winded, detailed speech and description of their sex life, talking about how he has a voracious sexual appetite and she does not, she leaves him unsatisfied, and how now they only have an agreement that they only have sex when she wants it, etc etc. He then goes on to tell me more things of that nature, and how is wife told him a few years ago that if he "needed to go outside of the marriage to have his needs met she wouldn't care as long as he was discreet" He said he'd never done this because he hadn't found anyone with whom he had a "deep enough connection". At this point I thought it couldn't get any worse, and was I wrong.
He then goes on to say how much he's going to miss me when I leave in the fall (heading off to college), and that "if he was fifty years younger we would probably be attracted to each other" and that he "thinks about that a lot". GROSS!
This entire time I'm just nodding my head and acting like I'm not repulsed and freaked out by what is happening, and try to change the subject multiple times. He ignores me and continues talking about his sex life. I eventually excuse myself to go to the bathroom to text my friend about what was happening, and when I come back he says he hopes he didn't "scandalize" me and how he has only ever told three or four people about this problem in his life. What possessed him to talk about this with his seventeen year old conversion student and not a friend or a therapist loving baffles me.
I played it cool until we left, but now I'm at a complete loss. I suppose I could say something to the junior rabbi about it, but I don't know how I would get him alone without Rabbi R knowing. I do trust the junior Rabbi and felt like I've always had a very safe and appropriate relationship with him, albeit not nearly as close as with Rabbi R. I don't think the junior Rabbi and I have ever been alone together. I am extremely reluctant to say something about what happened because I did agree to let him "get personal" with me and because I absolutely hate being a whistle blower in this situation. I am very angry that I was even put in this position and I'm extremely uncomfortable. I want to finish my conversion because I have worked really hard to get where I am, and if I switched to another Rabbi I would have to start over which could take another year.
I have no idea where to go from here, any insight would be appreciated.
tl;dr: My Rabbi got really sexual with me, an underage conversion student, and I'm not sure how to move on from here.
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May 10, 2017 19:02
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Jun 11, 2024 19:22
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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i guarantee his wife did not say that
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May 10, 2017 19:04
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May 10, 2017 16:45
