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Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

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echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
lol so my wife had her age on facebook set wrong so on tinder she was 102 and I fixed it and HOLY poo poo now she could get laid every hour of the day if she wanted. jesus. which is good for me because she wasn't finding so much action and its not cool when its unbalanced extramarital boning

one woman tho shes full on cheating on her hubby with about a thousand dudes per second do I wanna get on board

PLUS one sexy accented british chick who is interested in me being her dom but lives 3 hour drive away



shits about to get real

also tomozza is one year gently caress a versary with my main lady

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

echinopsis posted:

one woman tho shes full on cheating on her hubby with about a thousand dudes per second do I wanna get on board

:yeah:

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
she said she was 39 but when i met her turns out she's 44 but i don't care that she lied and honestly the older the better. she's fit as hell too. she does sleep with her kids mates tho. will that make me a bad person


also lol i must be the only person not gagging at the bit who she has shown interest in but isn't diving in, in the casual sex world of power dynamics where one often wants it more than the other i actually have the upper hand here lol. i think she's not used to it.

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
at a party last night met a woman in a poly/open couple who must have been doing this for ages. when she was leaving we had a thing where both looking at each other saying "nice to meet you, looking forward to
meeting you again", but with that total body language of "and i'm desperate to choke on your cock", and im so intrigued coz she looks at least 55+ #winning

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

echinopsis posted:

she said she was 39 but when i met her turns out she's 44 but i don't care that she lied and honestly the older the better

:yeah:

echinopsis posted:

she does sleep with her kids mates tho

:yikes:

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

please tell me she had her kid at age 14

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
mate do ya maths. her eldest is like 20

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
yeah she sleeps with dudes less than half her age. gently caress she's a fantasy come true for them

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

thats really hosed up if her son knows them

also, her ELDEST is 20, are any of the friends of a younger child? :stonk:

maybe she's bipolar acting out in a manic phase or something, id stay away

Trig Discipline
Jun 3, 2008

Please leave the room if you think this might offend you.
Grimey Drawer
itt a bunch of goons find out echi is loving their mom

SeaGoatSupreme
Dec 26, 2009
Ask me about fixed-gear bikes (aka "fixies")
Just wanted to pop in to add ER nurses and yoga instructors to the "loves to choke on dick" list of professions. Keep doin' the lords work echi, gently caress those moms

e: also paramedics
e2: also retail drones

Is this poo poo universal? I'm having a hard time thinking of a recent partner that didn't like the gggkkk

SeaGoatSupreme fucked around with this message at 23:33 on Jun 25, 2017

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo

echinopsis posted:

lol so my wife had her age on facebook set wrong so on tinder she was 102 and I fixed it and HOLY poo poo now she could get laid every hour of the day if she wanted. jesus. which is good for me because she wasn't finding so much action and its not cool when its unbalanced extramarital boning

one woman tho shes full on cheating on her hubby with about a thousand dudes per second do I wanna get on board

PLUS one sexy accented british chick who is interested in me being her dom but lives 3 hour drive away



shits about to get real

also tomozza is one year gently caress a versary with my main lady

It's cool you guys share your stds together.

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy

mishaq posted:

thats really hosed up if her son knows them

also, her ELDEST is 20, are any of the friends of a younger child? :stonk:

maybe she's bipolar acting out in a manic phase or something, id stay away

maybe 22 i can't remember exactly but she did gently caress
a 19 year old lol

she's a total fox tho

Trig Discipline posted:

itt a bunch of goons find out echi is loving their mom

:smugmrgw:

Burt Sexual posted:

It's cool you guys share your stds together.

jealousy looks gross on you dude

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo

echinopsis posted:

maybe 22 i can't remember exactly but she did gently caress
a 19 year old lol

she's a total fox tho


:smugmrgw:


jealousy looks gross on you dude

Unlike yours, My dick is unqtipped.

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
Just broke up with main gf.. I think this is a good thing. Well, she kinda got sick of the situation, where ultimately my wife could pull the plug and that happened today and I was like "sooner or later you're going to have had enough" and she was like "I think that's now"

as far as break up goes.. well, we never had a fight or said anything mean to each other.. and no one blames the other person.. and I had some of the best times and sex of my life with her. Great person. wow. big loss, but I think perhaps it was clouding my life a bit. lesson is that you can get too connected I think. thought I would be sadder

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo

echinopsis posted:

Just broke up with main gf.. I think this is a good thing. Well, she kinda got sick of the situation, where ultimately my wife could pull the plug and that happened today and I was like "sooner or later you're going to have had enough" and she was like "I think that's now"

as far as break up goes.. well, we never had a fight or said anything mean to each other.. and no one blames the other person.. and I had some of the best times and sex of my life with her. Great person. wow. big loss, but I think perhaps it was clouding my life a bit. lesson is that you can get too connected I think. thought I would be sadder

Wow didn't see that coming, sorry man.

KoRMaK
Jul 31, 2012



echinopsis posted:

Just broke up with main gf.. I think this is a good thing. Well, she kinda got sick of the situation, where ultimately my wife could pull the plug and that happened today and I was like "sooner or later you're going to have had enough" and she was like "I think that's now"

as far as break up goes.. well, we never had a fight or said anything mean to each other.. and no one blames the other person.. and I had some of the best times and sex of my life with her. Great person. wow. big loss, but I think perhaps it was clouding my life a bit. lesson is that you can get too connected I think. thought I would be sadder

you might be, as time goes on and you see something out in public that reminds you of how she made you feel

James Baud
May 24, 2015

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

KoRMaK posted:

you might be, as time goes on and you see something out in public that reminds you of how she made you feel

Stay away from the small appliances aisle!

Death Bot
Mar 4, 2007

Binary killing machines, turning 1 into 0 since 0011000100111001 0011011100110110

James Baud posted:

Stay away from the small appliances aisle!

Toasters? Yes
Microwaves? Yup
Stand mixers? You better believe it

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
yeah already know those feelings, we talked about everything, look outside and see grass? oh yep fertiliser chat

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy

Burt Sexual posted:

Wow didn't see that coming, sorry man.

oh just to be clear i mean the main gf that isn't my actual wife

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

echinopsis posted:

Well, she kinda got sick of the situation, where ultimately my wife could pull the plug

what exactly does this mean

sometimes while you're out with your side piece your wife sometimes gets jealous/lonely/whatever and ends your scheduled encounters early purposefully?

or like, she calls you because of some mundane husband duties and it's just an interruption

Trig Discipline
Jun 3, 2008

Please leave the room if you think this might offend you.
Grimey Drawer
i assumed it was code for something to do with anal beads

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy

mishaq posted:

what exactly does this mean

sometimes while you're out with your side piece your wife sometimes gets jealous/lonely/whatever and ends your scheduled encounters early purposefully?

This, kind of

more though like, plans arranged, and then cancelled at last minute. although what you described did happen.

putrid aidsman
Apr 13, 2017

by Lowtax

echinopsis posted:

This, kind of

more though like, plans arranged, and then cancelled at last minute. although what you described did happen.

Sounds cool

yeah actually they will
Aug 18, 2012

Moist von Lipwig
Oct 28, 2006

by FactsAreUseless
Tortured By Flan
lmao

cda
Jan 2, 2010

by Hand Knit

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

ZombieJesus
Feb 26, 2005

He died for your sins, he rose for your BRAINS
I just had a tinder date last night, and you can add "saddle maker" to your list of occupations that like to deep throat

Moist von Lipwig
Oct 28, 2006

by FactsAreUseless
Tortured By Flan
Well that would make them a horse person so that tracks.

PIZZA.BAT
Nov 12, 2016


:cheers:


PokeJoe
Aug 24, 2004

hail cgatan


echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
lol u guys

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
holy poo poo my friends i've just come
outside for a quick joint

this evening is insane

little munchkin
Aug 15, 2010

echinopsis posted:

holy poo poo my friends i've just come
outside for a quick joint

this evening is insane

nice dude. can't wait to hear about the sex you had

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
thats why you come to this thread

anyway backstory - she lives 3 hours away, we matched because she was in town for work.. and maybe comes over here once a month. anyway we had been chatting for a while and I found out shes quite into dom/sub, like properly, where one dude IS her dom and controls the evening, he tells her exactly what to do, and if she doesnt he punishes her etc etc. anyway its a new world for me, don't know if I am completely into that myself, but regardless she has a dom and they're not exclusive, so he lets her sleep with someone else, but not in a proper dom/sub way

and so we met in the bar, went back to her room. I am so god drat attracted to her. we were both SUPER nervous, and both had that feeling like the other person was super attractive and feeling lucky to meet the other one.

she's also super honest and open, our communication is really really good, and she's super respectful of the open relationship and the boundaries and making sure its all happy for my wife

and she has a totally hot english accent

the sex was incredible. down for fuckin everything god and not only that but loves everything. its probably the dom/sub thing but turns out people who work for the ministry of education also love completely choking and gagging on cock

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang



echinopsis posted:

holy poo poo my friends i've just come

nice

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Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

echinopsis posted:

holy poo poo my friends i've just come

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