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Squashy Nipples posted:National Treasure Ben Stern lectures on ordering Coffee and KFC SUGAR...IT'S CANDY! I mean, at least he KNOWS he is insane in talking about this. Can you image if he ever tried a S'mores Frappuccino?
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Jul 8, 2017 19:55
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Squashy Nipples posted:I'm getting really loving sick of Howard's "Sheep and Wolves" rap. No, owning a gun does not make you a wolf. It's a loving moronic oversimplification of an incredibly complicated issue. That song is one hundred thousand percent about Warren Beatty and anyone who pretends otherwise is playing into her little game. Or one of the 500 people she's told 'the real truth' to over the years would have blurted it. Even if it isn't about him, whoever it's written about - contrary to the main lyric, the song IS about him, it's all anyone talks about when they discuss the song, so what's so vain about knowing a fairly successful pop artist was so sprung on you that she had to write a butthurt song about it when she got dumped?
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Jul 8, 2017 20:19
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Bonzo posted:My cousin's husband is a long time functioning alcoholic who uses hard drugs from time to time. He's only 46 but has been told he has the liver of a 75 year old man. He's go other poo poo wrong with him but they have a hard time treating him because his body is so worn out. I've known a few people like that in my time as well. It's pretty sad. Of course Artie looks so old at this point that it's little wonder he's starting to fall apart. If he's set up for long-term antibiotics he's really got some issues, however. I can't imagine how severe the infection is. Ether Frenzy posted:That song is one hundred thousand percent about Warren Beatty and anyone who pretends otherwise is playing into her little game. Or one of the 500 people she's told 'the real truth' to over the years would have blurted it. On the bright side, it is a good song. At least she made the best of that rejection and anger and at least made it a classic.
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Jul 8, 2017 23:18
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Mad Doctor Cthulhu posted:At this point he probably had a nose infection that spread, and in treating him for that doctors opened a junkie's Pandora box. Somebody posted a recent photo about 10 pages back showing his nose looking all hosed up but I can't find it.
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Jul 9, 2017 01:33
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He looks catastrophically bad in most of the scenes he's in in Chasing, that HBO sitcom, and yet somehow his nose is the most noticeable giant bloated monstrosity.
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Jul 9, 2017 01:35
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i feel bad for artie, its really all caught up to him
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Jul 9, 2017 01:41
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I love listening to old bits, especially with Gary, where someone says one random word and Howard keys in on it and turns it into a merciless beating for the next hour. Howard mentions Gary had a new home theater setup and Gary said "yea it has 8 seats and 3 stools" and that was all she wrote.
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Jul 9, 2017 01:55
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Crotch Bat posted:I love listening to old bits, especially with Gary, where someone says one random word and Howard keys in on it and turns it into a merciless beating for the next hour. Howard mentions Gary had a new home theater setup and Gary said "yea it has 8 seats and 3 stools" and that was all she wrote. Reesees
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Jul 9, 2017 02:09
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That Gary impression is all it takes to bust on him. It doesn't matter what he says. Gary - "I'm gonna be talking at the United Nations" Howard - "Hey boff, Ah'm gonna be talking about vinyl at the United Nations. I hope I don't get bored". Poor Gary.
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Jul 9, 2017 02:15
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BiggerBoat posted:Somebody posted a recent photo about 10 pages back showing his nose looking all hosed up but I can't find it. Oh geez, I wonder if he's going to have the middle part of his nose removed and just end up looking even more like a pig. I would normally laugh but the more I think about it the more horrifying it is. Skip My Posts posted:i feel bad for artie, its really all caught up to him If he's really unlucky this is only the beginning. It's horrible to go out like this, but if he hangs out and slowly degrades over time...loving hell. I kinda hope it's not too late for him for turn things around or this is finally the thing that allows him to either get clean or get his poo poo together because if this is it he might hang on and it would just get worse.
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Jul 9, 2017 04:58
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Lol if Jackie outlives Artie
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Jul 9, 2017 05:00
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5/15/07, Howard is talking about how out of touch Oprah is and starts talking about college kids eating "Roman" noodles. He says it at least twice
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Jul 9, 2017 08:11
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euphronius posted:Lol if Jackie outlives Artie Its pretty much a certainty at this point isnt it?
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Jul 9, 2017 09:21
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Ether Frenzy posted:5/15/07, Howard is talking about how out of touch Oprah is and starts talking about college kids eating "Roman" noodles. He says it at least twice Remember when they had the football pool and a chicken was a contestant... the chicken was named Sanders but Howard always read it as "Saunders," not getting that the chicken was named after Colonel Sanders from KFC. Nobody correct him and it was like nails on a chalk board every time.
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Jul 9, 2017 09:33
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Lorette.
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Jul 9, 2017 09:38
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euphronius posted:Lol if Jackie outlives Artie Jackie was never a hard drug user. He boozed a lot, sure, but he's also been dry more or less since he left the show if I remember right. He also never ate like Artie either.
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Jul 9, 2017 14:14
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Crotch Bat posted:Jackie was never a hard drug user. He boozed a lot, sure, but he's also been dry more or less since he left the show if I remember right. He also never ate like Artie either. I'm pretty sure Jackie quit drinking after he left the show and now has pretty much become Jack LaLanne.
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Jul 9, 2017 15:09
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Norm reaching out to Artie https://twitter.com/normmacdonald/status/884684387106738181
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Jul 11, 2017 16:40
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Bonzo posted:Norm reaching out to Artie Ha, some people... https://twitter.com/Ms_MaryContrary/status/884780359979859968
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Jul 11, 2017 16:44
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Same people would say Norm didnt even care if he handled it exclusively in private
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Jul 11, 2017 17:02
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Bonzo posted:Norm reaching out to Artie drat. Norms offering to gently caress Artie for money
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Jul 11, 2017 17:16
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Cold gold makes you old well before your time!
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Jul 11, 2017 18:34
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See pot dont make you older and pot dont make you fat, it just makes you feel real friendly and you know thats where its at!
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Jul 11, 2017 21:19
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Moen faucets, nigga!
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Jul 11, 2017 22:44
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One of these days, this whole "saw a bunch of posts, thought Artie died" posts will be accurate 
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Jul 11, 2017 23:14
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I'm already working on my favorite memory plus mild insult to express the frustration of watching someone destroy themselves while refusing help for when he goes.
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Jul 12, 2017 00:22
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BobbyK posted:I'm already working on my favorite memory plus mild insult to express the frustration of watching someone destroy themselves while refusing help for when he goes. I'm thinking of going with the quote from Dusk Till Dawn "May you find the peace in death that you never had in life" Followed by "Waaaaa I'm dead Waaaaa"
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Jul 12, 2017 02:36
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I'm working on some joke involving eating meatballs in heaven with Grandma Caprio.
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Jul 12, 2017 02:48
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Listening to mid-90s stuff and whenever Howard says something with "mini" in it Fred and occasionally Jackie join in repeating it in sort of a high-pitched tone. Are they imitating Ratso?
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Jul 12, 2017 03:48
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Crotch Bat posted:Listening to mid-90s stuff and whenever Howard says something with "mini" in it Fred and occasionally Jackie join in repeating it in sort of a high-pitched tone. Are they imitating Ratso? It might be a Gina Man/Girl Girl impression. One of them used to say "mini dress" in a weird way (where it kind of sounds like mini dwess).
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Jul 12, 2017 06:21
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DeadBonesBrook posted:It might be a Gina Man/Girl Girl impression. One of them used to say "mini dress" in a weird way (where it kind of sounds like mini dwess). This is what they're doing. Also, there was a time whenever Tom Cruise would come up, they would chorus "Tom Frooze!" in that voice.
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Jul 12, 2017 10:18
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I think I have decided that Fred's Grillo impression may be myyyyy favvvvvorite. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TcsVlDtIASg
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Jul 12, 2017 12:57
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Fred used to play a Gina Man drop where it sounds like he was saying "mega cheese" and they would laugh hysterically every time. Anybody know what Gina man was trying to say or know what I'm talking about?
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Jul 12, 2017 16:51
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I think it was "Smegma-cheese"? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smegma
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Jul 12, 2017 16:56
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This is mother theresa speaking from the bed I ain't dead yet I got more feet to taste.
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Jul 12, 2017 17:25
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Howard imitating his parents is probably my favorite thing ever on the show. There's just a bottomless well of material to pull from and it's all hysterical.
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Jul 12, 2017 17:46
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How did Howard's sister turn out? Is she just as screwed up?
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Jul 12, 2017 18:02
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Crotch Bat posted:Howard imitating his parents is probably my favorite thing ever on the show. There's just a bottomless well of material to pull from and it's all hysterical. Howard this is Mom, the station did a horrible thing, Tim's assistant Jared took us to a concentration camp.
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Jul 12, 2017 18:08
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-Atom- posted:Howard this is Mom, the station did a horrible thing, Tim's assistant Jared took us to a concentration camp. Tim's assistant Jared put us on a rocket to the planet Krypton, where Superman is from, and we're here living under the tyranny of the red sun.
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Jul 12, 2017 18:19
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Bonzo posted:How did Howard's sister turn out? Is she just as screwed up? I believe she's relatively normal. Howard's also said she really dislikes attention, so that's why she's only been on like one time.
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Jul 12, 2017 18:21
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