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Panfilo
Aug 27, 2011

EXISTENCE IS PAIN😬
:stonk: :barf:

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Tinestram
Jan 13, 2006

Excalibur? More like "Needle"

Grimey Drawer
Nooner: :therapy:

Gynovore
Jun 17, 2009

Forget your RoboCoX or your StickyCoX or your EvilCoX, MY CoX has Blinking Bewbs!

WHY IS THIS GAME DEAD?!

Nooner posted:

(awful, awful things)

Jeezus, dude, do you actually enjoy being probated?

I'm guessing your mommy called you a "horrible monster" as a kid, so seeing it on your screen gives you a woody nowadays. Or something.

quidditch it and quit it
Oct 11, 2012


What the actual gently caress. I read the comics thread, and that's just blown it out of the water. I've seen some poo poo, but what the gently caress...

Mycroft Holmes
Mar 26, 2010

by Azathoth
welcome to fluffy ponies, everyone. it gets worse. much worse.

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

I had just managed to forget the last time I'd been exposed to fluffy ponies, and now I get to feel vaguely filthy inside all over again :negative: .

Can we get some kind of palate cleanser in here, please? Are there any new submissions lined up, loquacius?

limp_cheese
Sep 10, 2007


Nothing to see here. Move along.

It doesn't matter what hosed up poo poo I see on the internet. There is always more, and it is always worse.

I still remember a time when I thought goatse was the worst thing ever. Now I expect to see it in every photoshop thread and I don't even bat an eye.

soy
Jul 7, 2003

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Reminds me of the time I had to scrape a rotten raccoon corpse out of my crawl space wherein the guts had completely opened up and the liver and poo poo was all just blehhh rhghg god I feel loving sick thinking about it. It smelled so horrid that I had to put it in like 6 trash bags and you could smell the trash bin from down the street even then. I'll never get an animal murder boner now. :(

I. M. Gei
Jun 26, 2005

CHIEFS

BITCH



Nooner posted:

hwo often do u jerk it to fwuffy ponys raccoon guy

7 YEARS LATER EDIT TO REMOVE THE HORRIBLE poo poo THAT WAS HERE CUZ I NEVER WANNA SEE IT

This makes me legit sad.

Mycroft Holmes posted:

welcome to fluffy ponies, everyone. it gets worse. much worse.

Oh good, there's more. :cry:

I. M. Gei fucked around with this message at 21:02 on Apr 17, 2024

limp_cheese
Sep 10, 2007


Nothing to see here. Move along.

Dr. Gitmo Moneyson posted:

Oh good, there's more. :cry:


limp_cheese posted:

There is always more, and it is always worse.

sugar free jazz
Mar 5, 2008

Yoooo welcome back nooner (:

Viva Miriya
Jan 9, 2007

Mycroft Holmes posted:

welcome to fluffy ponies, everyone. it gets worse. much worse.

There's a Mario winans song that says just how I feel on poo poo like this.

Altared State
Jan 14, 2006

I think I was born to burn
How have people never seen that before?

Viva Miriya
Jan 9, 2007

We Know Catheters posted:

How have people never seen that before?

gently caress you mean

Sjs00
Jun 29, 2013

Yeah Baby Yeah !
just lol if you haven't chopped of the weggies of a fwuffy pony

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.
So can someone link to Electric Retard and get it all over with so we can move past the stupid gross web comic derail where we all act shocked at MSPaint drawings?

Hopper
Dec 28, 2004

BOOING! BOOING!
Grimey Drawer

We Know Catheters posted:

How have people never seen that before?

By doing the only thing that keeps you sane: never loving google weird terms/things that come up in SA threads and are either tagged as NWS or only mentioned in passing and then have several others go "oh god now don't google that" or "now I can't unseen this".

Motherfucker
Jul 16, 2011

I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.
Fluffy Ponies are truly some darkness from the grease trap of the human condition.

Altared State
Jan 14, 2006

I think I was born to burn
I don't understand it. People getting off on mutilating fake creatures.

Rumda
Nov 4, 2009

Moth Lesbian Comrade
Jesus even the know. your meme description is a cespit.

Motherfucker
Jul 16, 2011

I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.

We Know Catheters posted:

I don't understand it. People getting off on mutilating fake creatures.

I'm pretty sure it started out as an ironic jab at the my little pony fan-base but slowly the faux fur and foam and wire slid off revealing that at its core is a demon summoned by the pent up evil in the hearts of a disturbingly huge group of people who unironically want to torture small helpless subhuman yet clearly sentient animals to death.

Ziv Zulander
Mar 24, 2017

ZZ for short


Motherfucker posted:

I'm pretty sure it started out as an ironic jab at the my little pony fan-base but slowly the faux fur and foam and wire slid off revealing that at its core is a demon summoned by the pent up evil in the hearts of a disturbingly huge group of people who unironically want to torture small helpless subhuman yet clearly sentient animals to death.

In other words, the internet

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

SatansOnion posted:

Can we get some kind of palate cleanser in here, please? Are there any new submissions lined up, loquacius?

Sorry, been busy this weekend

quote:

Hi

I sent in a confession a while back about my upcoming Castlevania themed haunted house I was making with my lottery winnings.

Good news and bad news.

Bad news is Netflix and Konami found out and sent various letters to my home. I about poo poo my pants and figured I had lost my investment.

Good news is they like the idea, but don't like me personally profiting off their IP. Especially with that new show drumming up interest in a pretty dormant property.

So, Halloween 2017 will be the opening of "Castlemania, presented by Netflix and Konami". The only Castlevania themed haunted attraction in the world.

It's a loving headache (I have to remove a bunch of poo poo, put in some poo poo, and change stuff to match their specific character design sheets). But they also sent a team of pros to help my guys out, and I got the opportunity to work with artists and musicians to make my place even better.

I pay them a fee (and trust me, it's a big fee) for the Castlevania name, music, etc. But I've done the math, if I can get at least 30 people on average a night from September 15th through November 4th I'll still make a massive profit.

No Google hits for this attraction just yet. Either you're pullin' our leg, or you need to get on that poo poo

quote:

I'm in the closet and I'm also the chairman of my local Republican Party.

Oh yeah, I'm also married and have a child on the way in about 7 weeks.

I grew up being taught that gay is not okay, and was convinced that sex just was gross in general and I wasn't supposed to enjoy it. It was just for procreation. That's how I married and got her pregnant.

I ended up looking up something called Apartmenr Wrestling, where fit guys roll around on their undies and filmed it. That kind of unlocked things for me.

I masturbated for the first time ever, at age 34, to one of these videos. It was amazing and I instantly realized I had wasted my life trying to fit a square peg in a round hole.

I know this is a cliche "lol republican turns out to be a closet case" but in my case, it's true. I don't know what to do.

hehe peg in round hole heh

Nissin Cup Nudist
Sep 3, 2011

Sleep with one eye open

We're off to Gritty Gritty land




Republican Goon, if you have any sort of moral decency please switch parties. Preferably 20 years ago, but its never too late

TNO
Jul 9, 2006

I drank all your Kool-Aid.
GOP goon, be a force for positive change inside the party.

kalel
Jun 19, 2012

Nissin Cup Nudist posted:

Republican Goon, if you have any sort of moral decency please switch parties. Preferably 20 years ago, but its never too late


TNO posted:

GOP goon, be a force for positive change inside the party.

How about neither of these things and instead ghost your family and friends and make a new life for yourself in Mexico, because you honestly have no other options besides grinning and bearing it until you inevitably cheat or violently snap

kalel
Jun 19, 2012

Also there's no way castlemania goon is telling the truth, Konami would never do something mutually profitable with someone infringing on their copyright

Streak
May 16, 2004

by Nyc_Tattoo
just go to an anti-gay conversion retreat thing, your party has been touting them for years

Panfilo
Aug 27, 2011

EXISTENCE IS PAIN😬
The only thing Konami goon is getting is a lifetime of hard labor in the pachinko mines.

PostNouveau
Sep 3, 2011

VY till I die
Grimey Drawer
Tell your wife and then break up with her. It's the honest thing to do, and it's kinda like ripping the band-aid off all at once rather than dragging her slowly through your relationship disintegrating.

Bust Rodd
Oct 21, 2008

by VideoGames
Raising your child inside of a lie that is slowly killing you just teaches them to never be honest with themselves about their own needs. Even if you think you could bear it for your lifetime, why bring a baby into a family that is based entirely on secrecy and restraint?

vortmax
Sep 24, 2008

In meteorology, vorticity often refers to a measurement of the spin of horizontally flowing air about a vertical axis.
The obvious answer is for gay GOP goon to get a cheap burner phone, install Grindr, and have tons of sex. Just say you're married and exploring, and they'll be all over you.

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.

vortmax posted:

The obvious answer is for gay GOP goon to get a cheap burner phone, install Grindr, and have tons of sex. Just say you're married and exploring, and they'll be all over you.

According to my roommate, this is like a gay dinner bell.

PostNouveau
Sep 3, 2011

VY till I die
Grimey Drawer

vortmax posted:

The obvious answer is for gay GOP goon to get a cheap burner phone, install Grindr, and have tons of sex. Just say you're married and exploring, and they'll be all over you.

This is, like, exactly the slo-mo marriage disintegration that would devastate the wife and kid. Just break it off and then get on Grindr and poo poo.

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Solice Kirsk posted:

According to my roommate, this is like a gay dinner bell.

Oddly enough I think I've heard lesbians hate hearing that

the gay dinner bell is a lesbian stink bomb

Clockwerk
Apr 6, 2005


There's just no pleasing everybody

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.

loquacius posted:

Oddly enough I think I've heard lesbians hate hearing that

the gay dinner bell is a lesbian stink bomb

That's because they know that women change their mind all the time and are fickle. Lesbians are actually the most misogynistic people in the world. They should respect women more.

TehRedWheelbarrow
Mar 16, 2011



Fan of Britches

Solice Kirsk posted:

That's because they know that women change their mind all the time and are fickle. Lesbians are actually the most misogynistic people in the world. They should respect women more.

Neutrino
Mar 8, 2006

Fallen Rib

Mr. Unlucky posted:

legalize all drugs

gently caress the cartels and nerd dipshit scammers

You have to understand that all laws were put in place for very good reasons - to put brown people in jail.

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loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

quote:

I found out recently one of my exes had passed away three years ago. She left behind a 6 year old daughter :( .

We only dated a couple of months, but during that time she showed more proactive interest in me than my current wife in the last six years. She also gave the best blowjobs of any person I've ever met. The thought that those epic blow jobs are no more is devastating.

Also she married a woman after breaking up with me so I'm the last penis she's ever experienced in her life.

I wanted to say something about how you need to stop fixating on someone you dated for two months several years ago, but I've never had an ex die so I shouldn't judge :shrug:

Sorry for your loss I guess

The following confession contains a lot of what I'm guessing are Twitch references

quote:

The reason most Jackbox Party box streams require Twitch logins as manditory option because I used to be not logged into twitch and sneak into any streamer's quiplash and Drawful games and keep using Goatse and "Donald Trump's penis" as Drawful and Quiplash anwsers respectively. I managed to convince a streamer that Johm Scarce did the quiplashing once. Also no I wasn't aware of Trumpbangsthings from Internet Comment Etiquette on youtube at the time. NO I DID NOT INVADE THE DRAWFUL TORUNEY PYSCHEDELICEYEBALL SET UP I FORGOT ABOUT IT AND I LOVED HIS LPS TOO MUCH TO BE A DICK TO HIM

Also I'm pretty sure the real reason the people who did the Masters spinoff of Legend of Dungeons where you would watch the persons twitch and spawn monsters into the persons game stopped updating it is because I kept using a certain Star Wars ep 7 spoiler as the names of a sea of high level monsters on the first floor. I used Britbong's twitter account as the promotion above the spoiler.

my twitch name is REDACTED

Removed the twitch name because either this is a sockpuppet confession or it violates anonymity

Sorry if that ruined the joke

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