A Wizard of Goatse posted:

My girlfriend just naturally eat healthy and exercises while I'd have to put actual work in it's not faaaaair

quote:

My best friend from college, Hannah, has been dating her boyfriend Ray for about three years. We generally bring our boyfriends with us to events/hangouts, so I know him pretty well. Recently she confided that he told her he's intending to propose within the next few months. I don't think Ray is anywhere remotely ready for marriage, though. Reasons being:

• He is incredibly irresponsible with money. No impulse control. If he wants a toy (new iPhone/better TV/upgraded gaming system) he'll just buy it, whether or not he has the money for it. Now, surprise surprise, he's in credit card debt.
  
• He's 27 and still lives with his parents. Undoubtedly connected to the whole fiscal irresponsibility thing.
  
• He has failed classes in community college because he just doesn't go to them or put forth any academic effort. Sometimes Hannah writes his essays for him.
  
• Pretty much his only hobby is gaming. There's nothing wrong with gaming, I know, I enjoy it in moderation too, but to me having your life revolve around it screams "escapism."
  
• His sense of humor is pretty immature/physical. Farts, penises, etc.
  
• He whines/sulks if something happens that he doesn't like.
  

So, I mean...it's not like he's Satan. He's not abusive or mean. I have talked with Hannah in the past about the importance of financial responsibility in a life partner, so you avoid the type of person who would spend your house downpayment on a sports car, and she agrees in theory, but brushes it off as a minor concern. (Edit: have never said anything negative/questioning about Ray to her--this exchange was a while ago and in general terms.)

I mean...it's her life to live, and love is blind. Is this just her mistake (or non-mistake, because hey, maybe he'll grow up) to make?

tl;dr: Best friend's boyfriend is a manchild. Should I try to reality-check her before he pops the Q?

Absurd Alhazred posted:

In honor of the page number, here's the first result when you search for "Satan" in r/relationships:

My [23F] best friend [23F] may be about to marry a manchild. Should I say anything?

maskenfreiheit posted:

OP just wants him for herself

Absurd Alhazred posted:

In honor of the page number, here's the first result when you search for "Satan" in r/relationships:

My [23F] best friend [23F] may be about to marry a manchild. Should I say anything?

quote:

He's not abusive or mean.

Absurd Alhazred posted:

In honor of the page number, here's the first result when you search for "Satan" in r/relationships:

My [23F] best friend [23F] may be about to marry a manchild. Should I say anything?

quote:

u/Moneypitz
My wife and I have been married for 2 years now and have been together 5. We met through mutual friends and it was a whirlwind of passion and romance from the start. I used to be a playboy before her and she changed me into a good guy. I'll admit, a few weeks into our relationship I cheated on her, but she forgave me and we continued forward. We have been through so much and I do love her, but God drat I feel like I hosed up somewhere along the road here. Looking back on everything I'm kicking myself.

She's always been very controlling since the beginning and doesn't let me have any female friends, and hates my entire family. All of my friends hate her and she doesn't have anyone but her family. She's very competitive with her younger sister so she rushed everything so she could "beat her sister". She pressured me to propose,I had to make it super romantic, our wedding was 30k and it was all on credit because she wanted the best, I had to buy her a brand new vehicle and I bought myself a new one too because she wanted us to look rich. She doesn't believe in working and being a wife so she has been out home since we've been married. She pressured us to get pregnant so now we have a newborn and I love him, but she has put on at least 60 pounds since we got married and she looks so...gross. I'm really sorry, I know. But her mother and older sisters are all morbidly obese and now I'm starting to see a pattern. She went from thin and athletic to humongous and not giving a poo poo about her appearance.

When I bought the vehicles, I had a great job and could afford rent plus car payments, credit card payments, student loan payments, and spoiling her like she wanted. I lost that job after a year and now we've been evicted from our apartment, are living with her parents in her old childhood room, I've had to ask my mom for help to pay my car payments, I work in a poo poo job that barely pays anything, and on top of that, every day my wife tells me that I'm not a man. Her sister is successful, beautiful, and living the total opposite of our lives. My wife hates it. I hate it. I feel like I'm drowning. I can't afford any payments, I can't afford to feed my own baby, my wife refuses to work, her family looks down on me, and on top of that, my YOUNGER brother is doing a million times better than me and I can't bear to face him anymore. He hates my wife too and warned me not to marry her because in his words "she's the devil". Here I am, almost late 20s with a kid and a wife, over 100k in debt with a job that pays poo poo, living in a small bedroom in my in-laws house. My credit is loving horrible, I won't be able to buy a house because of the eviction on my record plus my credit, I won't be able to rent another apartment either. I can't get rid of my cars now because how will I get another one with my lovely credit? I can't even afford to save up for a loving beater car, and my wife will hate me even more if she has to drive a crappy car.

I guess I just needed to vent, but does anyone have any advice for me? Is there anything I can do? Please help me, I feel so depressed and disgusting and like a failure. Please please, any advice could help me. Even tough love.

Tldr: wife and I have 100k+ in debt, she doesn't work, I work a lovely job, she hates me, I feel like a loser. Help.

quote:

I have been with my bf since we were in highschool and he was always a lovable dork. After we graduated I began working retail full time at a high end electronics store and now I'm the manager and I am happy to have a job I enjoy and make decent money at. Meanwhile bf, who I'll just call Bill, went to college and graduated with a useless degree he still hasn't found a job with years after graduating. After he graduated he did nothing and sat around his parents home watching anime and playing video games all day.

I knew he had no sense of motivation and when I told him that I could not be with him he begged me to give him a second chance. I only did after he managed to get a job at a local fast food place and seemed to have a mature. Last March he asked me to move in with him in our own place and I said yes. We took a one year lease on a studio apartment with low enough rent that we could still have fun and put most of our paychecks in savings. We had only been at our new place for a few months when Bill told me that he was laid off. He promised to get another job.

Suddenly he was back to his old behavior and on top of it he refused to do any chores and would pout when I didn't get breakfast or dinner ready for him before I went to work. Plus if I made something he didn't like he would just sigh and push his food around his plate. It got worse after he dropped the ball that he had not been saving his money like he told me but had been spending it all on games and a new laptop ( that he said was a gift from his parents) and that he couldn't pay his bills. When I got mad he began crying and said that he would look for another job. He did go to a few interviews and nothing came from it.

It all came to a head when I ran into an old coworker of his and found out that he was fired from his job for calling in too much and not doing any work when he did show up. During his shifts he would just mess around on his phone and hide from customers. Finally the manager fired him after she found him on his phone with customers waiting to order.

I was livid when I got home to confront him and he began crying and blaming me. He said that I was pushing him too much and that he shouldn't have to work at a fast food place since he is "educated". He said that the only reason I climbed up the ranks at my job was because I'm " lucky" not because I worked hard. This got me so angry and I told him that if he wants to act like a manchild then he would have to act like one without me. I left home to cool off and when I got back he was still on the bed and was asking how I could be so cruel to him.

I'll admit that I lost my cool and told him that wanting him to pay his half of the bills and do chores around the house is not being cruel. He just ignored me and said how I was just like his parents and that once he finds a job he will prove to us all that he isn't a failure. I told him that I'm done with him and that I'm leaving when the lease expires in April. He called me some names and left to stay with his parents.

Now he won't speak to me except for texting me asking for an apology and telling me that he has no life without me. his parents contacted me and offered to pay for his half of the rent until April and apologized to me multiple times. Apparently the only reason he wanted to move in with me was because they were fed up with him and wanted him to take some responsibility.

Now he won't stop blasting me on social media and is telling people that I'm emotionally abusive and that I destroyed his self esteem. I removed myself from all forms of social media but I'm afraid that he will ruin my reputation and everything I have worked for. I don't know how to deal with this, he will not let me go.

Tl;Dr Bf lied to me and acted like a child and I left him. Now he is telling people on social media that I was emotionally abusing him.

Bubblyblubber posted:

"devil" also returns some slightly too perfect gold.

My wife (23F) and I (27M) are drowning in debt and have been evicted from our apartment. We also have a newborn. I don't know what to do anymore and feel like I made a huge mistake. I am begging for any advice or tough love.

Bubblyblubber posted:

"devil" also returns some slightly too perfect gold.

My wife (23F) and I (27M) are drowning in debt and have been evicted from our apartment. We also have a newborn. I don't know what to do anymore and feel like I made a huge mistake. I am begging for any advice or tough love.

quote:

She's always been very controlling since the beginning and doesn't let me have any female friends, and hates my entire family.

Admiral Ray posted:

You idiot you shoulda seen this miles away but I guess losing your spine made you lose your eyesight too.

quote:

I'll admit, a few weeks into our relationship I cheated on her, but she forgave me and we continued forward.

WampaLord posted:

To be fair, he did give her a reason to not trust him around female friends:

WampaLord posted:

To be fair, he did give her a reason to not trust him around female friends:

quote:

She pressured us to get pregnant so now we have a newborn and I love him, but she has put on at least 60 pounds since we got married and she looks so...gross. I'm really sorry, I know. But her mother and older sisters are all morbidly obese and now I'm starting to see a pattern. She went from thin and athletic to humongous and not giving a poo poo about her appearance.

maskenfreiheit posted:

I did a search for "manchild" and oh boy:

My (25f) boyfriend (25m) is upset after I called him a manchild during a fight about him refusing to act like an adult and now he is telling people that I emotionally abused him

quote:

He just ignored me and said how I was just like his parents and that once he finds a job he will prove to us all that he isn't a failure.

maskenfreiheit posted:

I did a search for "manchild" and oh boy:

My (25f) boyfriend (25m) is upset after I called him a manchild during a fight about him refusing to act like an adult and now he is telling people that I emotionally abused him

WampaLord posted:

To be fair, he did give her a reason to not trust him around female friends:

quote:

Basically, my boyfriend and I were playing around on Snapchat filters (the kind that alter your face), and he took a picture of me with the devil filter on--the one with the fiery eyes and the devil horns and black background. Because it looked so hilariously scary, we cracked up about it for a good while and I decided to send it to my parents for fun. My boyfriend is very close with my family, and often comes over for dinner, drinks, and such. Last year he even came with us on a month-long vacation. In the message I said something like "look at this photo [bf] took of me."

So I was stunned when I got a sudden, ANGRY phone call from my dad, in which he basically yelled at me for thirty straight minutes about how my boyfriend was a disgusting human being, does he think this kind of stuff is funny, he has cursed me for life, etc. He believes that by photographing me as a demon (signifying death) he's brought death to me and something bad is gonna happen to me. He says that seeing that picture made him feel scared/disturbed/angry for me the whole day, that he deleted it immediately from his phone, and that he's trying to erase the image from his brain. He was angry at me for letting it happen, but mostly at my boyfriend for taking it.

I'm Japanese-American btw, and so is my boyfriend. My family has never been religious but not atheist... it's weird, in Japan most people are not religious but believe in the existence of nature spirits, demons, quite a bit of superstition, etc. and I had ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA he believed in something like this this strongly until now. It just has never come up.

I was so stunned all I could do was apologize and say we had absolutely no idea that it could mean something like that and we were just having fun with some filters, and it seems like he's forgiven me for the most part, but he WILL NOT talk to or acknowledge my boyfriend. It's been THREE WEEKS. I finished my Master's thesis recently so my family suggested going out to celebrate, and last night when I suggested that my boyfriend could come too, my dad shut me down and said he didn't wanna see him ever again. It sucks even more that I'm living at home right now, until the end of summer, which would usually mean my boyfriend coming over often to hang out with my family. My dad refuses to let him into our house.

I do not know what to do. I've already apologized, he's already apologized (through my mom, since my dad refuses to see/talk to him). It's also very difficult for me to understand why my dad is so angry because to me his anger is incredibly loving ridiculous. It's a SNAPCHAT FILTER. What the hell do I do?

quote:

Me and my gf, let's call her Cara, have been dating for 4 months. I met her family maybe a month ago. They all are completely normal, and Cara is completely normal. Her family is not that crazy about me and probably thinks that I'm a loser compared to Cara but they're polite enough, and her parents let her make her own decisions.

Now the exception to their normality is Cara's little brother, let's call him Liam. Liam is 16 and insists on everyone calling him by his Satanic/Wiccan name. He does not like me at all and is either a Satanist or is Wiccan. Neither Cara nor her parents are willing to specify exactly what Liam is doing or practicing.

I was obviously surprised at Liam's religious preferences, but I love Cara, and I'm willing to tolerate him. The line, however, is when Liam's religious practices interfere with me. Liam constantly makes implicit threats about calling on demons and doing blood rituals with pork blood...I don't even know. The things he says and threatens to do are so ridiculous that I sometimes think he's messing with me. I try to bring Liam up with Cara and she's always like, "Why do you obsess over him so much? What's wrong with you? He's just being a kid." And I complain about him doing rituals with summoning whatever to attack me and she's like "Haha like do you seriously believe that?"

I've tolerated this for several weeks now, but every time I see Liam, he gets more and more eccentric. He's started saying things to me like, "you're going to die soon", "You will die a painful death", and some weird poo poo about summoning demons to "sodomize my soul". This wouldn't concern me usually because I don't stay at Cara's house, but I am actually worried that Liam is mentally unstable and will attack me when he realizes that his summoning and death rituals to kill me don't work.

quote:

My sister calls me a dork, dweeb, runt and annoying. She tells me to leave gently caress off sometimes, especially when she is with her friends. I introduced my girlfriend to my family and my sister warned her not to play with my emotions or else.

I am confused, why would my sister be mean to me but then, act all protective of me? I am confused I thought she hated me. Does anyone else have sisters because this is weird.

tl;dr: My sister is confusing me

maskenfreiheit posted:

My [14M] sister [16F] calls me annoying and names all the time. I introduced her to my girlfriend [14F] and she warned my girlfriend not to play with my emotions or else. I am confused I thought she hated me

quote:

I’m sorry this is kinda long, but this is a complicated situation and I wanted to cover as much as I could.

Background : My mother and I used to have a good relationship. My real father died when I was a baby and she has been a single mother for most of my life, and me being an only child, we were close. She sacrificed a lot for me. For a long time she has not had much of a personal life because she worked a lot to support us and when she wasn’t working, she was getting me to piano lessons and soccer practice, etc.

About a year ago, she put herself out there and tried to date again. It wasn’t long before she was seeing someone, which was not at all surprising because she’s beautiful and takes great care of herself; she still looks like she’s in her late 20s/early 30s. She told me his name was Richard (changed of course), this wealthy German man who had “swept her off her feet”. I was initially really excited for her because she seemed really smitten and was already dropping the big L word. After I actually met him, I found out he was very smug and elitist, which my mom seemed blissfully unaware of.

Unfortunately his pretentiousness was not the only problem. This pattern of him making incredibly inappropriate comments began whenever we were alone together. Whenever my mom wasn’t around it was like a switch was flipped, he would start watching me very closely and saying things like, “I can’t believe a pretty thing like you doesn’t have a boyfriend” “You’re welcome to come by any time to use my pool” (I hadn’t even mentioned it).

At first I thought I was reading too much into it, but the comments have escalated over time. He has underhandedly found ways to ask me if I’m a virgin and if I masturbate. He was also very touchy, finding excuses to touch my face and rub my shoulders (I’m cringing just remembering that). I’ve always been kind of awkward and had a lot of anxiety about confronting people, so I didn’t know how to respond. I reached my breaking point about a month and a half after meeting him. I finally told my mother, and even though I didn’t provide a lot of details (it was very hard to say them out loud), she was shocked and disappointed. She went to Richard and he apologized for being “too friendly”, and blamed it on cultural differences between Europe and America. I could just tell that she believed he was innocent. She said he wanted to apologize to me but that I didn’t have to see him again, and that she would stop seeing him if that’s what I wanted. But she looked so hopeful that it was only a misunderstanding, and she had already been so hurt, so I gave him another chance.

He apologized and I accepted. The inappropriateness stopped for the most part and even though I still didn’t like him, I tolerated him for my mom. But then after less than six months of dating, he proposed and she said yes. It seemed really soon to me, but I found out soon after that they were going so fast because she was pregnant. I’m pretty sure it was an accident, and that Richard talked her into keeping it. Either way, I was heartbroken. Even more so when I realized she wanted us to move in with him. I resented her a lot for not even asking me if I was okay all of it, especially after the problems I had had with him. I really wanted to tell her how unhappy I was with the whole thing, but even if it wasn’t for the pregnancy, I couldn’t have done it to her. She had given up so much for me and I felt like I owed it to her.

Problem : They’ve been married for three months now and we’ve been living with him for just as long. His creepy behavior towards me is back and honestly worse than before. It seems like whenever my mom isn’t around he’s making comments about my appearance, asking inappropriate questions, or invading my personal space, and I even have to lock the door when I shower because he’s “accidentally” walked in on me before. I try dodging his questions and I spend a lot of time locked in my room to avoid him as much as I can. On the rare occasion that I do end up alone with him, I’ll even tell him when I’m uncomfortable but that just seems to humor him. I have no idea what to do. My mother is having a difficult pregnancy because she’s older and that causes a lot more complications, so she’s tired all the time and kind out of it. I don’t even know how I would approach her. I have no close family locally to go to and I’m afraid if I go to my mom, this extra stress could cause her to lose the baby. But I feel unsafe constantly and I’ve been drinking a lot to cope with stress. I dread coming home.

Is there a way for me to bring this up to my mother without stressing her to death? Is there anything I can do to get Richard off my back? I really need some help here because I am out of ideas.

TLDR : My stepfather comes on to me but I feel like I can’t tell my mom because she is having a difficult pregnancy and I am afraid the extra stress will make it worse.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

hail Satan

My [24F] father [51M] refuses to talk to or even acknowledge my boyfriend of 5 years [25M] over a photo he took of me using a Snapchat filter.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Me [23M] with my gf's brother [16M], who performs Satanic/Wiccan rituals on me

maskenfreiheit posted:

My [17F] stepfather [50sM] acts very inappropriately toward me and I don’t know what to tell my pregnant mother [39f]

quote:

Is there anything I can do to get Richard off my back?

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

btw my Satanist name is Rock and Roll Sodomy

PetraCore posted:

Why do I feel like 'Richard' married the mom to get at the teenaged daughter?

maskenfreiheit posted:

My [14M] sister [16F] calls me annoying and names all the time. I introduced her to my girlfriend [14F] and she warned my girlfriend not to play with my emotions or else. I am confused I thought she hated me

maskenfreiheit posted:

I did a search for "manchild" and oh boy:

My (25f) boyfriend (25m) is upset after I called him a manchild during a fight about him refusing to act like an adult and now he is telling people that I emotionally abused him

quote:

I'm adopted, I'm white and half my family is puerto rican on my dads side. My grandmother is a very superstitious woman. She believes in heaven, hell, demons, monster etc. My girlfriend has a tattoo on her arm that's the devils symbol. It's a goat/devil head in the pentagram. Is it to much to ask her to just cover it up for one day, not even a day it's more for dinner.

tl;dr: is it alright to ask girlfriend to cover up a devil tattoo for dinner.

quote:

UPDATE: Cheers guys for the help. She said she had no problem covering up. She's going to wear a long sleeve t shirt

Pick posted:

Haifisch posted:

Today on 'you really had to ask the internet about this?'

My [24M] girlfriend [23F] is meeting my parents. My grandmother [99F] is a very superstitious woman. Is it alright to ask my girlfriend to wear a long sleeve shirt to cover up a devil symbol tattoo when we go to dinner

quote:

So long story short, girlfriend got ossified last night and in her drunken stupor she tripped a girl in the bar. Instead of apologizing my GF said "you get what you deserve c--t." The girl sprang up to have words wifh her and a guy she was wifh stepped between them. My GF scratched at the guys face and actually took a huge chunk of skin out of his cheek wifh her nails. He closed hand punched her right in the mouth, it's a miracle she didn't lose teeth. She went down in a heap. Bouncers came in, dragged us all out, cops were waiting, paramedics there shortly after. Me and the girl who was tripped talked the cops out of arresting either of them and promised we would of our seperate ways, by some miracle if worked. Both guy and my GF got checked out by the paramedics and we were released.

Girlfriend has a huge fat lip and is crazy hung over and in pain, but through all of it...she's morning and whining at me that I "didn't have her back" and I should have punched the guy. When she's been coherent enough she's actually screamed and cried at me and I'm sort of scared of her. The truth is she started all of if and I don't want to have her back when she was clearly in the wrong. The guy didn't do anything wrong and I can't imagine hitting someone blindside like it would have been.

I don't know what to do here, she's always full of drama when we go out (my friends call us Meegan and Andre it happens so often) but this is the first time it's gotten physical.
Any advice?

tl;dr: Girlfriend started a fight and got punched by a guy. She's mad I didn't punch the guy.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Absurd Alhazred posted:

my (23m) girlfriend (24f) of 1 year started a physical fight last night and ended up getting punched by a guy. Cops released everyone so no legal trouble but she's super upset I didn't punch the guy who hit her.


Gee, I don't know, maybe ?

Absurd Alhazred posted:

my (23m) girlfriend (24f) of 1 year started a physical fight last night and ended up getting punched by a guy. Cops released everyone so no legal trouble but she's super upset I didn't punch the guy who hit her.


Gee, I don't know, maybe ?

Absurd Alhazred posted:

my (23m) girlfriend (24f) of 1 year started a physical fight last night and ended up getting punched by a guy. Cops released everyone so no legal trouble but she's super upset I didn't punch the guy who hit her.


Gee, I don't know, maybe ?

LadyPictureShow posted:

Does anyone understand the 'our friends call us Meegan and Andre' reference? Am I just an old?

Motherfucker posted:

Girlfriend sounds like she's been drinking the 'just ignore it' koolaid.


They clearly need to loving stop this bullshit behavior before this autistic little turd grows into a manchild like the ones in this thread. He's not 'obsessed' with him, your loving family is inured to just how lovely this kid is, its like the growling snappy little dog nobody wants to train.

Absurd Alhazred posted:

my (23m) girlfriend (24f) of 1 year started a physical fight last night and ended up getting punched by a guy. Cops released everyone so no legal trouble but she's super upset I didn't punch the guy who hit her.


Gee, I don't know, maybe ?

lemon-lyme disease posted:

I think it's a reference to The League. That's why I said the thing about hats.



If it helps, I'm not that terribly far into my 30s.

e: That character dates another character's ex, her name is Meegan, it's a whole thing about how they get off on drama, I think? It's been awhile.