/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Me 40m with my 30f wife. "You know your over your ex when you can honestly say, you hope they have a good life" .... Really?Breakups
18 points 79 comments submitted 3 years ago by Infinity425 to r/relationships

Who is the genius who actually decided this ? Did he meet my wife? Do people actually believe this ? Lets assume for arguments sake that I am a good human being. The best kind. Caring, compassionate, faithful, hard working, and honest. After a 2 year marriage my wife suddenly decided she doesn't want to be married anymore. This was after I supported her and her son as she struggled through nursing school. She just decided she didn't have it in her to be a wife, and said she really never loved me. It has been 9 months since our separation.

I went through a hell darker than I would ever have imagined a human being could endure getting over her. It forced me to look at myself, and who I was, what i was, what I did or didn't do right. I became a person, a stronger person who I didn't think I had inside of me. Through darkness comes an unstoppable inner strength. Life is now beginning to become good, things are falling into place. I am not with anyone but I have realized I don't NEED another person for my own happiness. I love life, I surround myself with good people, and stay away from the "not good people". I donate my time a few nights a week to the less fortunate (and I keep that to myself). I am physically in the best condition of my life (yes a divorce does that, I am addicted to heath and the gym, that's not a bad thing I guess) Life is good. But I HATE this girl with every molecule of my body. I will HATE this girl until my life is over. We are not truly over them until what??? I cant explain in words my feelings towards her. I have tried, but cant come up with anything that is strong enough to explain it. I am not going to say I want her to die. BUT I want her to have a miserable life with every breath she takes. I want her to know what karma is. I want her to fail in each and everything she tries. I hope when she does die (of natural causes of course) that its not painless. Is this horrible of me? Is it wrong ? Is it cruel ? And am I an rear end in a top hat? Well if you think I am, then all I can say is...This is the pain I went through for 9 months of my life, this is the blackness I endured because she didn't "feel like trying". This hate for this human being, the things I just said here in this rant, are the best way I can explain how she made me feel after she dumped me like a used piece of crap. Life is good.....but I have one small piece of hate I will always hold for her.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 02:58

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# ? May 30, 2024 11:17

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

Admiral Ray posted:

I dunno which part you're talkin' about here 'cause I didn't see him say anything about being sexually assaulted in this story.

uh the guy mentioned his bro hit him... not sure why you had to take it to a rapey place

# ? Sep 4, 2017 02:59

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

Admiral Ray posted:

Stop talking to this piece of poo poo. Leave him. If this is all it takes for his suppressed thoughts about you to come out then when he's actually stressed out who the gently caress knows what will happen?

What a pathetic joke, he can't even own up to this. and never look back.

There's an update:

[UPDATE] My boyfriend[25M] insulted me[25F] horribly during a fight, I don't know what to do next

quote:

First of all, thanks to everyone who took the time to give me advice, I truly appreciate it. I was still in a bad place emotionally when I wrote the post, and you guys helped get me out of it.

James and I had been together for four years, so I figured I'd at least let him plead his case. I allowed him to come back to the apartment for an hour or two so we could talk things over and so he could at least try to explain his actions(I let him know beforehand that even if I understood his reasons, I wouldn't necessarily forgive them). He more or less told me exactly what some of the commenters where speculating, that he was just projecting his issues onto me, and trying to make me feel as awful as he did. He said he knew exactly what my insecurities are and knew how to use them most effectively. He said that he was anxious about losing the job he had worked so hard for, and that since legal work is hard to come by he would potentially be out of a job for months, if not longer. He confided in me that despite what he had been saying about the work being challenging and fulfilling, he was actually overwhelmed and felt constantly belittled by his more experienced coworkers and was bottling it up to seem tough. He also said that he was jealous of me, since I'm doing well in my job and am treated with respect by my coworkers, some of who are my friends outside of work too, and that he felt like he was wasting his life at a job he doesn't like full of people who don't respect or believe in him. He said that he wasn't trying to rationalize his actions or defend them, but this was just to help me understand where he was mentally when he exploded at me.

He tried to convince me that he doesn't actually believe the things he said to me, that he's proud of how I've come out of my shell and made more friends, and how he never thought I was pathetic, just reserved(I'm not sure if I believe this just yet, but hearing it made me feel better). When I asked about the "pity gently caress" comment, he looked like he was about to cry, and told me that it was the most hurtful thing he could think of to say to me at the time. He reminded me that he has always been the one seeking me out; he's the one who asked me out, he's the one who asked to get a place together, he was the first one to bring up marriage, etc.

His explanations made me feel a little better, but I knew they weren't enough. I told him that we should spend at least a month apart, and that I would not be financially supporting him, and he finds another job and he'll have to stay at his parent's house until then. I also told that lashing out at me, or anyone else, in times of stress is unacceptable, and for me to even consider taking him back, he should see a counselor to identify the cause of his issues and address them. And, since his mother knows he screwed up somehow but doesn't know the specifics, I also requested one more thing: that he tell his mother everything, word for word, that he said to me. He agreed to all of my terms and said he'd do "whatever it takes" to let me know he's truly remorseful. And I did receive a call from his mother later that night, telling me that she was ashamed of how her son could behave in such a way, how she chewed him out for me, etc. later that night, so at least it seems like he is following my guidelines. Before anyone asks, he was not thrown out of his parent's house or anything despite his mom being DEFCON 1-level pissed, so he definitely has somewhere to stay for the upcoming month(s).

We spoke again yesterday, just asking how each other's day went and him asking how I felt, which was nice. He hasn't been fired yet but told me that his layoff is "basically confirmed"(he didn't elaborate any further) and has begun the job hunt. He also said that he has already booked an appointment with a counselor and will continue to book them until he and the counselor feel like his anger management issue(s) have been tackled.

Tl;dr I let him try to explain himself and set up my boundaries, and let him know what he said is absolutely unacceptable. He agreed to all of my requests and addressed them ASAP, but we are still spending some time apart.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:00

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

Pick posted:

My boyfriend[25M] insulted me[25F] horribly during a fight, I don't know what to do nextDating
667 points 281 comments submitted 1 year ago by heartbrokenthrway to r/relationships

James and I met in college sophomore year and became fast friends, but only started dating exclusively after we graduated, four years ago. Until now, James has been the light of my life- he's so energetic and sincere, and always tries to make me laugh and takes such good care of me. I'm very introverted and lost all of my friends shortly after undergrad graduation as they moved away, so James made sure to help me step out of my shell and become more forthright- it didn't really work, but I appreciated the thought, and I made a few friends. We never really seriously fought about anything; we've had little spats a few times, but those we over within minutes. When we first started dating, he introduced me to his family as soon as I was comfortable with it, and they accepted me and then some. His mother is always giving me sweaters, or cooking meals for us, or doing something else ridiculously nice. We moved in together a year and a half ago, after he completed law school and I was done with my Master's. We're both gainfully employed and make good money(he is a lawyer, I am a chemist), so we don't have any financial issues. We have been discussing getting married soon and having children within the next 5-7 years, something we were both very excited about. I thought everything was perfect.

This past Friday, James seemed tense. We usually go out on Fridays, so I asked him what was wrong and if he wanted to stay in tonight. He made a 'hmm' noise that I interpreted as affirmative. I wanted to give him space, so I went into our room to draw in my sketchbook and listen to music. After about two hours, I went back to check on him and see if he needed anything, and to find out what was bugging him. He looked visibly more agitated than before, and had a beer in hand and a few empty bottles to his side.

When I went to ask him what was wrong he looked at me for a second, then launched into a tirade. He said that he was tired of seeing how pathetic I was, how it was a Friday night and I was in my pj's wasting time like a child, how I was too incompetent and weird to make even a single friend without help. He said he felt like he was wasting his life spending it with me, how he wanted more excitement and fun and deserved more out of life. He said that dating me was a mistake, but he knew that I was 'safe' since no one else would want such a weird girl(he is my first boyfriend), and how I am a "pity gently caress [he] got attached to". I was completely devastated, I couldn't even defend myself, or say anything at all. After he was done he looked away from me, obviously not going to apologize. I gathered my essentials and left our apartment as quickly as possible, and went to a hotel near my workplace. I'd never felt so awful in my entire life. That day I could do was cry, try to calm down, fail, cry some more, and sleep.

The next day I woke up just past noon to see that I had over 20 missed calls and dozens of texts from James. He said that on Friday, one of the HR guys let it slip that he would be let go soon, which is why he was so on edge in the first place. Law work is hard to find where we are, so he was lucky to get the job in the first place, especially right out of school. He was drowning his sorrows in beer and making himself more and more angry and scared, and he finally couldn't handle it by the time I came by to see him. He said that he didn't mean a word of it, that I'm not weird or incompetent or anything like that, that he didn't even really know what he was saying. How he got blind drunk after I left and woke up in a panic after realizing what he had done. He apologized over and over again in his texts, and while reading them he called my phone again.

I picked up and he apologized to me more, saying how he loves me so much and is disgusted with himself for saying what he said. He sounded genuine and I could hear the tears in his voice, but I didn't want to see him yet. He said he'd stay with his parents so I could come back to the apartment. I'm back home and I have time to think about everything, but I don't know what to do, not at all. I love James more than anything, but what he said was so vicious and touched upon all of insecurities. I do think he's genuinely remorseful, but I'm unsure if I should give him a second chance. I want to, but that is my heart talking, not my head. I need to be logical about this.

lmfao she proves the bf's claim she has no friends right when she has to go sleep in a hotel

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:00

YeahTubaMike: Mar 24, 2005; *hic* Gotta finish thish . . .; Doctor Rope

Pick posted:

When I went to ask him what was wrong he looked at me for a second, then launched into a tirade. He said that he was tired of seeing how pathetic I was, how it was a Friday night and I was in my pj's wasting time like a child, how I was too incompetent and weird to make even a single friend without help. He said he felt like he was wasting his life spending it with me, how he wanted more excitement and fun and deserved more out of life. He said that dating me was a mistake, but he knew that I was 'safe' since no one else would want such a weird girl(he is my first boyfriend), and how I am a "pity gently caress [he] got attached to". I was completely devastated, I couldn't even defend myself, or say anything at all. After he was done he looked away from me, obviously not going to apologize.

this is incredibly cruel

:murder:

Absurd Alhazred posted:

[UPDATE]

WHY THE gently caress

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:00

Proteus Jones: Feb 28, 2013

maskenfreiheit posted:

lmfao she proves the bf's claim she has no friends right when she has to go sleep in a hotel

Eh, personally I'd never drag a friend into a fight like that. I'd probably book a hotel as well.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:02

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

maskenfreiheit posted:

uh the guy mentioned his bro hit him... not sure why you had to take it to a rapey place

Oh I skipped over that. I went and found the comments on that post and one of them was basically like "You were sexually assaulted", so that's where that came from.

And yeah him getting punched in the stomach is bad but the guy is still in the closet.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:03

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

Absurd Alhazred posted:

There's an update:

[UPDATE] My boyfriend[25M] insulted me[25F] horribly during a fight, I don't know what to do next

Bad move, he'll do the same poo poo again. People that automatically attack others because they're feeling like poo poo don't change. That's part of who they are.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:05

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

Admiral Ray posted:

Oh I skipped over that. I went and found the comments on that post and one of them was basically like "You were sexually assaulted", so that's where that came from.

And yeah him getting punched in the stomach is bad but the guy is still in the closet.

i think the problem is most guys don't understand the kinsey scale

a 1 or 2 on the kinsey scale is basically "i'm not gay but the guy sucking my dick is"

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:05

Barudak: May 7, 2007

While it was a Reality Check, neither player was anywhere near the puck and have assigned 2 minutes in the penalty box to player 25, James

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:06

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

maskenfreiheit posted:

i think the problem is most guys don't understand the kinsey scale

a 1 or 2 on the kinsey scale is basically "i'm not gay but the guy sucking my dick is"

True. I guess if he is open enough that brojobs can be a legit real thing then that's pretty neat, but goddamn that he wasn't wondering about the status of his relationship with his best friend of decades after they hosed. The friend did act way outta line by hitting him, and at this point he's gonna lose that relationship.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:07

dudeness: Mar 5, 2010; Cat Army; Fallen Rib

Pick posted:

Me [26F] and my husband of 4 years [34M] disappointed in him after having a baby. I can't take care of both of them

He works from home on the computer. His job requires he takes a lot of breaks since it's a lot of clicking. But even if he has 4 hours of work it takes him all day. He is barely finished when i go to bed. Then he stays up all night to finish and as he says " I have poo poo to do". He always has stuff to do. When he is finally done he needs a break, so he plays Fifa. Then he ends up going to bed around 5 in the morning. Which results in him sleeping all day. And he can't break the cycle.

On break, sprained fingat

dudeness fucked around with this message at 03:13 on Sep 4, 2017

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:08

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

Pick posted:

How to deal with a GF who dislikes sports?

But the latest issue involved baseball. A few weeks ago I chose to stay at home and watch a baseball game where my favorite pitcher for my favorite team was in the process of throwing a no-hitter instead of going to an impromptu dinner with her and her friend. I tried to explain the historical significance of the event, how cool it would be to me to see the whole thing, how I wasn't even hungry because we had been to a happy hour just previously where we had eaten at, etc. None of this appeased her. She said it was "crazy" to choose to watch a game on TV instead of going to dinner with a friend and said (paraphrasing) "how am I supposed to explain to her that you're not here because you're watching a stupid baseball game?"

Girlfriend should have compared this to WoW to properly convey how big of a shut-in dork he's being. "But honey, I can't have dinner with your friends, I'm in the middle of an epic raid and how could you ask me to miss this? I've already cut my raiding down to once every single Saturday and Sunday, why isn't that enough for yoooooou?"

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:12

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

My dad [45M] cheated on my mom [40F] and is bribing me [15F] not to tell my mom, what should I do?

quote:

I heard my dad laughing, so I walked in his room. I caught him in bed with a woman who is not my mom. After she left, he told me that he will buy me an Xbox One if I agree not to tell my mom.

What should I do? I fell guilty about not telling mom, but I always wanted an Xbox One and I don't want my family to split. I have a 12 year sister who would be affected deeply if mom divorces us. This would traumatize her.

What should I do?

TL;DR : Caught dad in bed with another woman (not my mom) and he will buy me an Xbox One if I don't tell mom. What should I do?

Imagine putting your kid in this position.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:15

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

Absurd Alhazred posted:

My dad [45M] cheated on my mom [40F] and is bribing me [15F] not to tell my mom, what should I do?

Imagine putting your kid in this position.

Blackmail your dad, kid. It's too bad you didn't get pictures 'cause then you'd be riding easy street for decades.

Also if your dad is loving dumb enough to do this poo poo with you kids being around then your mom probably already knows but is ignoring it.

Admiral Ray fucked around with this message at 03:20 on Sep 4, 2017

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:17

TOOT BOOT: May 25, 2010

I know teenagers are stupid but selling out your own mom for a $300 xbox is pretty cold.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:19

Barudak: May 7, 2007

TOOT BOOT posted:

I know teenagers are stupid but selling out your own mom for a $300 xbox is pretty cold.

Yeah, he should hold out for the 500 Xbox One X at minimum

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:20

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

corn on the cop posted:

I [25M] had a blowout with my best friend [25M] last night after he confessed that he was in love with me. I'm straight except for stuff I've done with him and he's gay.

i'm totally not gay and had no idea my best friend was into me over ten years despite numerous blowjobs and full-on-loving

Why are ~~girls~~ guys so hard to figure out?

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:21

Barudak: May 7, 2007

She should help her dad estimate what the alimony payments will be then charge about 50% of that

Barudak fucked around with this message at 03:26 on Sep 4, 2017

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:21

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

TOOT BOOT posted:

I know teenagers are stupid but selling out your own mom for a $300 xbox is pretty cold.

She seems to be concerned about her mother leaving them and how it will affect her 12-year-old sister, too.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:22

13Pandora13: Nov 5, 2008; I've got tiiits that swingle dangle dingle

Absurd Alhazred posted:

My dad [45M] cheated on my mom [40F] and is bribing me [15F] not to tell my mom, what should I do?

Imagine putting your kid in this position.

The obvious answer is to get the xBox, then tell mom anyway. And tell mom about the deal so dad gets extra hosed in court.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:24

The Lone Badger: Sep 24, 2007

ZearothK posted:

I am starting to believe all those blowjob stories were written one-handed.

The good side is that if the goon ever gets really mad at the 14 years old kid he's going to have his rear end handed to him. A half hour walk is like two kilometers for an average person walking at average speed, my 75 years old grandma does them, and is perfectly comfortable unless you got a lot of sun, rain or snow dropping on your head.

30 minutes to and from. Or 15 minutes one way. About a kilometer and a half (or a 'mile' as Americans call it.)

That's in the range where even if you have a car it's barely worth using it.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:42

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

And he could easily split the difference by biking to school, assuming he got over his :airquote:

bad cardio :airquote:

.

I'm usually sympathetic to people wanting/needing cars because American public transit is a joke in most places and our towns are often laid out terribly for walking, but if OP can manage it without dying, so can their gooncousin.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:48

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

Haifisch posted:

And he could easily split the difference by biking to school, assuming he got over his bad cardio .

The practicality and safety of that really depends on where in Mass they are.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:50

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

Are there that many places you could safely walk 30 minutes but biking that same distance would be too dangerous?

I doubt OP's living on the edge and taking a super-dangerous route to school.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:53

13Pandora13: Nov 5, 2008; I've got tiiits that swingle dangle dingle

Haifisch posted:

Are there that many places you could safely walk 30 minutes but biking that same distance would be too dangerous?

I doubt OP's living on the edge and taking a super-dangerous route to school.

In the US? Most places, especially at the asscrack of dawn when school starts. You can walk on sidewalks/in lawns, you have to bike on the street and we drive like goddamn maniacs.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 03:56

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

Reasonable odds wherever they are there isn't even a sidewalk. Or shoulder. You'd have to have a death wish to bike in suburbia

# ? Sep 4, 2017 04:59

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Yeah, there are a couple sidewalks in my neighborhood once the road gets within two blocks of the major road/high school/stoplight combo, which was probably required by a state, county or city statute. The rest of the neighborhood? People walking dogs or their kids in strollers, children playing and riding bikes in the street. The 1 1/2 lane streets with blind corners (due to overgrown foliage on private property) and cars parked on both sides that people drive 40 mph on.

Sidewalks are scattered randomly through most American towns, almost like urban planners just threw darts at a board and called it good. Housing developers usually aren't required to build them, so almost all of them don't.

E: it's me. I'm the 30-something goon yelling at baby boomers to slow down so they don't murder children in my neighborhood

# ? Sep 4, 2017 05:37

Modus Pwnens: Dec 29, 2004

Suburban US drivers actively try to murder bicyclists. I'm not joking or exaggerating.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 05:57

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

Modus Pwnens posted:

Suburban US drivers actively try to murder bicyclists. I'm not joking or exaggerating.

Can confirm

They do it to pedestrians too but it's way easier to get out of the way

# ? Sep 4, 2017 06:04

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Modus Pwnens posted:

Suburban US drivers actively try to murder bicyclists. I'm not joking or exaggerating.

This is true, and one of the places I volunteered, one of my fellow volunteers was almost killed because a driver absolutely just hit him out of sheer absurd psychopathy. Almost killed the guy.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 07:32

Telephones: Apr 28, 2013

Pick posted:

TBH men of that period seemed to have way more reasonable standards. gently caress.

If you ever look at the art of famously beautiful princesses, even discounting that they were painted to be flattering, sometimes you're like "oh they look like normal people".

Woooow, crazy!

I think you mean disgusting. I'll take a model, thanks, just sex, hold the love and the touching too.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 07:44

precision: May 7, 2006; by VideoGames

how is the thread title not "Depressed roommate sleeping in cat piss" now

# ? Sep 4, 2017 08:04

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

precision posted:

how is the thread title not "Depressed roommate sleeping in cat piss" now

take it to e/n

# ? Sep 4, 2017 08:04

Danaru: Jun 5, 2012; 何 ??

Landlords turned off my water, electricity, smashed through my wall with a hammer and gave me 3 days to move out because I had 2 guests in my house.

quote:

I think it's important to point out that I live in London. They own the house but they are not registered as landlords no one knows they are renting which I didn't know until recently. My house used to be part of their house but they built an extension and turned it into two separate properties so I have no door number I'm just in a house next door. The fuse box is in their house and they control everything.

So I found a 1 bedroom house for �600 a month on Gumtree which is as cheap as a room in a house so I went for it. My dad (who was staying at his house in spain while he renovated his new house here, he sold our house so I had to find somewhere to live) went to meet with the landlords and take a look at it while I was at work.

I moved in the next day (in March), the landlords are an Albanian couple and ask for 2 weeks deposit 2 weeks rent (�600) to move in. I asked for a contract or something in writing but they refused. This was unacceptable to me but my dad agreed seeing as I had no other options, he was leaving the country the next day and had all of my things in his car. I wasn't happy and said I really need this in writing but they said "we won't give you anything in writing, you can take a picture of our ID and pay rent in cash" I was pissed off but had no choice.

A few months later I have my friend come over for a few hours to play games (I borrowed a PS4 and finally had my own place so I was really happy about this). The landlords went nuts. They told me I can't have guests because it costs them more money for two people to use a kettle or shower(?). I said that's ridiculous there's nothing about this in the contract because there is no contract and 1 person coming over for a few hours 1 day a week isn't bothering them, we don't use the kettle and they don't shower here.

They installed security cameras outside my door to "catch me" having my friend over. Later they came to me with the "evidence" and said I need to pay more money for my friend to be here or move out. They said it's now �700 a month and they want a copy of my friends passport and will class my friend as living here. I said my friend won't come round anymore but they refused the idea and said I have to do this or move out. I had nowhere else to go and my dad told me to pay it to keep them happy so I did.

I asked my friend not to come anymore, for 3 weeks there was no one at my house. I went to the landlords (I paid fortnightly) and told them they can see from the cameras no one has been here so can I just pay the normal rent now. They said no, it's always going to be �700 now or I can move out.

My friend starts coming round again since I'm paying for it. A few weeks later he has his dads funeral and tells me his two brothers are coming over from Ireland for it with no space for them to stay. I have a whole house to myself and I checked with a police officer before because my landlords are crazy - I am allowed to have guests to stay for a short time and since my friend is classed as living here, he is allowed to have his family stay round for a few days. So I agree, I wanted to do what I could do to help.

The landlords go crazy and tell me I have 3 days to move out because I have 3 guests in my house (it was a Thursday). I have to be out on Sunday at 3pm or else. I said I gave 2 weeks deposit so they need to give me notice but they tell me they won't give my deposit back and I have 3 days or else.

I try to talk to them but they shut the door and won't answer my calls. I try my best to move but it's impossible and Sunday comes around. 3pm they knock on my door, I say I'm sorry I told you I can't leave in 3 days I have nowhere to go I need actual notice. They go back to their house and turn off my water and electricity. They come to my house with 5 "builders" and start to kick off my door.

I call the police. The police arrive and almost arrest the landlords and make them switch my water and electricity back on. They tell them to give me notice or a section 21 and tell me that my landlords are insane. They leave.

The next day the landlords turn off the water and electricity again. I can't shower, wash my clothes, flush the toilet or wash my dishes. The male landlord then smashes through my wall with a hammer telling me to get out. I wake up to this man inside my house flailing his arm around through my wall with a hammer. I call the police again. Same story. The landlords print out a section 21 online and they sign it saying I have to leave 14th September.

A few days later they tell me they're going on holiday for a month and switch off the electricity (not the water) again the day before my birthday then leave the country. I pay to stay in a hotel because I can't cook or see in the dark or charge my phone etc.
All of the food in my fridge went bad, I can't charge my phone for work because it dies at night and I end up being late for work everyday because I'd wake up with my phone dead from full charge and no alarm (almost got fired but I have an amazing boss who understood my situation, I ended up staying up most nights not sleeping to make it to work but I'm not late anymore I got an alarm clock), I have to pay for takeaways everyday because I can't cook or store anything in my fridge. I have to pay for a gym to shower because I can wash my hair at home but I can't dry it. It's costing me so much money I can barely save up to move out.

Today there's still no electricity. They're back from holiday but told me it's broken and can't help me so all the police could do was ask them to get an electrician. I have 11 days to move out and some money saved up (doing the best I can) but could really use more time if I don't want to borrow money.

I know I brought this on myself because I agreed to not having anything in writing but I felt like I had no choice at the time. Is there anything I can do legally? This all seems so wrong..

TL;DR My landlords gave me 3 days to move out because I had 2 guests round. Turned off my electricity and water, gave me 3 days to move out and smashed through my wall with a hammer. I have no contract, just a verbal one. Can I do anything legally?

Edit: you guys are awesome, thank you for all of your advice. Even if I don't have to leave here I want to because 1) they are insane and 2) they'll probably just shut off my water if I stay here and try to win a legal battle and it's bad enough as it is without electricity right now. But it's costing me so much to live without electricity (takeaway food and washing clothes) that I could use a bit more time to save up more money. Also, if anyone knows any private places for rent without crazy landlords please hit me up! 😊

"Is this a red flag" I ask as my landlord tries to Jason Voorhees his way through my wall screaming angrily

# ? Sep 4, 2017 12:38

venus de lmao: Apr 30, 2007; Call me "pixeltits"

are people actually encouraging him to try and stay because he's legally within his rights to do so? I mean sure but this reads like People's Exhibit A in a murder trial.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 12:55

Fil5000: Jun 23, 2003; HOLD ON GUYS I'M POSTING ABOUT INTERNET ROBOTS

They might be telling him to stay because they're amazed he found somewhere for �700 a month in London. "So what if you could have been hammered to death, you're REALLY near the tube!"

# ? Sep 4, 2017 13:08

Danaru: Jun 5, 2012; 何 ??

Bertrand Hustle posted:

are people actually encouraging him to try and stay because he's legally within his rights to do so? I mean sure but this reads like People's Exhibit A in a murder trial.

Most of the comments were a mix between "Get out before they kill you" and "never ever listen to your father again what the gently caress", so pretty drat good by Reddit standards

# ? Sep 4, 2017 13:14

HazCat: May 4, 2009

Murder them and claim their house for your own. Arseholes like that aren't the type to have family or coworkers who care enough to come looking if they go missing. Just make them vanish and enjoy your new house.

# ? Sep 4, 2017 13:38

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# ? May 30, 2024 11:17

venus de lmao: Apr 30, 2007; Call me "pixeltits"

Fil5000 posted:

They might be telling him to stay because they're amazed he found somewhere for £700 a month in London. "So what if you could have been hammered to death, you're REALLY near the tube!"

My landlord is an actual lich but bay windows

# ? Sep 4, 2017 13:47

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