/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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Beachcomber: May 21, 2007; Another day in paradise.; Slippery Tilde

Breath play isn't Safe or Sane, regardless of Consent

# ? Sep 21, 2017 08:40

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# ? Jun 12, 2024 05:36

Beachcomber: May 21, 2007; Another day in paradise.; Slippery Tilde

Inescapable Duck posted:

Tyrantrum. It's a baby T-Rex. The grown up one gets a feather ruff and crown.

Actually this one is Tyrunt. Tyrantrum is the big one. This is important information.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 08:47

Darkhold: Feb 19, 2011; No Heart❤️
No Soul👻
No Service🙅

Smirking_Serpent posted:

My [66M] wife [64F] took away our grandson [3M] toy because she thought a Pokemon is scary for him. It's caused a fight between my daughter [28F] and wife and my wife is refusing to apologise.

Curious if she was always a hag or if she's starting to get a bit senile.

Anyway he needs to man up and stand up for his daughter.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 09:21

Fil5000: Jun 23, 2003; HOLD ON GUYS I'M POSTING ABOUT INTERNET ROBOTS

I don't even know how this is a question at all, taking away a toy the kid obviously adores because he carries it everywhere with him is Disney villain level lovely behaviour. That's ingoring the insults directed at the daughter which is it's own lovely thing.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 09:59

feedmegin: Jul 30, 2008

ArbitraryC posted:

I was hoping the update included her calling the cops on him but sadly only empty promises.

As an aside why do people do long spiels about how they were snooping but totally not snooping, like I get it whatever you sensed something was off, saw an opportunity to confirm it, and took it. I'm not gonna fault you for that, but like "i was reading their texts because maybe someone was dying" is hilariously bad as an excuse. Just say "I don't trust them anymore and wanted validation before I left".

Also though, um, how does someone literally committing a crime and banging a child not know to lock their phone? I mean, it's good he didn't, but wow, what a moron.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 10:19

Rat Patrol: Feb 15, 2008; kill kill kill kill
kill me now

Because it's not real. Not trying to be a killjoy, I wanted to check to see if there had been any more updates to that story at any point and found a post from the op claiming to have made it up to entertain themselves because the subforum was too full of boring true stories.

quote:

...I decided to make up a crazy story for fun, because I like to write stories but I usually never post them anywhere. I tried to think of the worst thing that you could possibly discover about your S.O., and how you would have to deal with that. And then I wrote the story, about discovering your husband has been hooking up with a teenage girl, and posted it. I didn't expect much to happen but it got over 500 votes and 400 comments. It just totally blew up which I wasn't expecting. I later posted an update which got more than 1300 upvotes. I'm sure I'll get some poo poo for making up a fake story and some people in this thread will attack me, but I don't feel bad for what I did. People were entertained, got invested in the story, and debated in the comments. That's what people come on Reddit to experience. Who cares if it was made up?

The good news is, there's not a kid being taken advantage of

# ? Sep 21, 2017 11:33

venus de lmao: Apr 30, 2007; Call me "pixeltits"

Improbable Lobster posted:

Plenty of people with autism manage not to be complete pieces of poo poo

Thanks for this, the reason I don't tell people about my diagnosis is that I've spent my whole life figuring out how to not be a fuckin oblivious weirdo and it's not worth trying to explain to people.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 12:49

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

lemon-lyme disease posted:

I admit that I have most of these games and was intending to work my way through them. I play pok�mon wrong though so it takes forever.

My husband (26) choked me (f26) in a play fight. Please help!

Okay. I'm stumped. Love the username though.

A lot of people don't realize how serious the strength difference between men and women typically is, even if it's just from sheer bulk and density differences. Good job finding that out play-choking your wife while taking her to the mat like the jobber she is, buddy! You should probably save that sorta thing for your homoerotic wrasslin' sessions with your bestie Steve.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 12:55

Bubblyblubber: Nov 17, 2014

Pvt.Scott posted:

A lot of people don't realize how serious the strength difference between men and women typically is, even if it's just from sheer bulk and density differences. Good job finding that out play-choking your wife while taking her to the mat like the jobber she is, buddy! You should probably save that sorta thing for your homoerotic wrasslin' sessions with your bestie Steve.

God created Adam and Eve, not The Undertaker and Steve.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 13:02

Palpek: Dec 27, 2008; Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.

He just wanted to gently stroke her hair.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 13:04

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

My girlfriend [24f] has hardly spoken to me [24,m] in 4 months

quote:

We�ve been together for exactly two years now, our anniversary was Sept. 15th. Although we have hardly spoken to each other over the past 4 months. It started back in June. We just didn�t talk for a few days (it happens, we don�t live together and just get busy).One of us will text/call the other and everything is fine.

This time though I texted her and got no response. A few days turned into a week. Than 2. and 3. Now a month. My texts went from �Hey, love I hope you have a good day.� to �please, if you are mad, just tell me. I hope you are okay.�

My attempting to contact her went from just a few texts a week to multiple times a day because I was genuinely worried that something had happened.

Towards the tail-end of July I decided I�m just going to go to her house (I didn�t do this sooner, cause her dad and I don�t exactly get along. He doesn�t hate me by any means, but her mom wishes I were dead.) No one was home so I checked with the neighbor. This is where it got weird. She flat out lied to my face about not knowing them. I know she knows them and I know she knows me.

I finally got a response from her a few days later on August 1st. She yelled at me over the phone for 10 minutes about how I got her in trouble and to leave her alone. That her phone was broken and that is why we have had no contact (completely plausible, I�ve watched her break 3 phones, 2 tablets and my 3ds over the course of our relationship, not maliciously or anything. Just clumsy). A week later she asked me to meet her for coffee. She looked me in the eye while crying her eyes out that she was sorry and needed to be a better girlfriend. We made plans to do something that weekend.

�. And turned around and hasn�t spoken to me sense.

This is something that has happened periodically over the course of our 5 year long relationship (2 dating, 3 friends). She will just go completely radio silent for a week, maybe 2. No reason ever given. She completely bails on dates. We will make plans to do something, say get coffee around 2. I�m at starbucks at 2. She is nowhere to be seen or heard from for the rest of the day. No reason ever given. I gave up asking for one years ago.

It�s so frustrating, because when we are together she is the sweetest most wonderful person I know, so It�s not like she is a abusive girlfriend. I can usually forgive her when she vanishes for a week, because I know she still cares� but I don�t know what to do anymore.

EDIT: a common question is if she has a mental illness. She does have depression and is in therapy for it. I've gone with her several times, and over the past 5 years, every time she has gotten depressed is when she wants to spend the most time together, so I don't think her depression has anything to do with this.

TL;DR: girlfriend and I have hardly spoken in four months. She isn�t abusive or anything. Just goes radio silent every so often, except this time she did it for 4 months.

Doesn't seem like this has ever really been a relationship, but I think it's over either way.

Edit:

I [25F] have been exclusively dating SO [30M] for a month. We had a conversation about a threesome and I am now very confused.

quote:

Hello Reddit:

Background: I have actually known of SO for a few years since we used to live in the same city while going to school. Never talked much but was a familiar face. Now my best friend works at the bar he frequents and that's where we re-connected. Both just got out of a long relationship early this summer.

First few dates were electric. Sex is mindblowing. (I had very low libido until a month ago. Apologies to all my previous boyfriends.) He just had a fun summer with a lot of threesomes and casual sex. Didn't bother me, since we were exclusively having sex, this is new, fun, and no strong feelings, so whatever... After about two weeks, he told me 'there was something different about me and he has completely stopped thinking of other girls and trying to get with them'. My dumb rear end believes it.

Everything has been pretty much great until last night. We talked about threesomes (which I've never done before) and I said that if I were to partake, exclusivity is off the table. I don't know that i could have threesomes with a guy I would want to date or potentially catch feelings for and watch him bang another girl in front of me. I told him I wouldn't know how I would feel about him afterwards. Maybe it wouldn't bother me, or maybe it would and I wouldn't catch feelings. I'm open to it but who knows. I've never done it before.

He was SO OFFENDED. He tells me that he can't believe that I could just turn off my feeling like that. That he opened up to me and was emotionally available to me when he has never been for anyone else. He acted like I just threw years of love down the drain.

I'm just confused because this does not seem like a big deal to me. It was a really casual conversation and ITS ONLY BEEN A MONTH. It's nothing serious. He doesn't even ever want to settle down so it's not like he's wasting his time finding someone. He doesn't want anyone long term.

Anyway, plot twist, come to find out from my bartender friend today that he was in some sex circle of friends at the restaurant where he works and they all trade partners, are in open relationships, and have deadlines for sending nudes of who they're sleeping with to each other in a group chat. They're super close and hang out all the time. Not sure of all the details here but a lot of his "funny friend stories" are adding up in a new light. Also not sure if he's still in it or not. Visiting him at work is also uncomfortable.
He also keeps in constant communication with his friend who he's had sex/threesomes with on several occasions. Again, he swears he's exclusive and so what's the big deal since they're really great friends.

He's into sex on a level unbeknownst to me. I'm just living a simple life trying to get some good sex from one person at a time and now I feel like I'm involved in a freaking sex circus. He's living in a whole other world of relationships and now I dont know how I feel about it.

My inkling is to abort mission and RUN. Am I being dramatic? Should I go with it? I just don't even know where to start forming an opinion about this. I also don't know if I trust him anymore.

What do I want? Nice guy, good sex, fun dates. Potential for seriousness. So I just want something easy, trustworthy, and not complicated. Maybe that's too much to ask.

Any insight is very much appreciated. Cheers.

EDIT: thank you guys so much for the insight. I haven't had a chance yet to read/reply to all comments yet but have skimmed some and I definitely have some more clarity on the situation. I talked to a mutual friend about this today and got some more insight from SO's perspective on the relationship so will post updates soon. Will be speaking with SO soon as well since I haven't talked to him since this happened. Thanks fam.

tl;dr: Threesome conversation with SO may have just ruined our simple budding romance. I feel like an alien on SO's sex planet and not sure how to proceed.

Absurd Alhazred fucked around with this message at 13:22 on Sep 21, 2017

# ? Sep 21, 2017 13:14

Hot Stunt: Oct 2, 2009

Tonight my [31M] wife [29F] of 6 years gave me an ultimatum. The resulting fight was probably enough to end our marriage, but is this the end? Really need outside perspectives.

quote:

To start, I apologize if this is the wrong place to post this kind of thing. I'm still pretty wound up about this situation, so please don't let my venting lead you to believe that it's always been this way. I promise our marriage really was happy before all of this.

2 years after our daughter was born, my wife and I moved back to our hometown to be closer to our parents. Shortly after that, my wife got it in her head that I needed facial hair and in general more body hair. I'm not really sure what prompted it, she just said she'd "like to see what I'd look like with a beard" and (until tonight) never really expressed more than that. I told her then she better buy me a novelty beard because it wasn't going to happen any other way.

Background: I don't grow much facial hair outside of small awkward patches that I shave immediately. I can't even grow stubble, and naturally I just don't have much body hair. I've grown "normally" in every other way: I'm above average height, I have a deep voice, full head of hair, in good shape, etc.. just no facial hair/minimal body hair. Doctor says it's genetic and just the way it is. It's never really bothered me, and TBH I actually really like this about myself.

Anyway, she just couldn't wrap her head around this. It's not like I hid this from her or anything, I've been clear about it for as long as we've been together. It wasn't something she had just learned about, almost 5 years into marriage. At first, she really didn't believe me, then she thought something was wrong with me. It had to have taken 6 months for her to really accept it. And she's not uneducated, she's an NP for fucks sake. Meanwhile the whole time I was growing more resentful and confused, how did I end up married to someone for 5 years that refused to understand a basic fact about me? We weren't having sex, which was initially her doing but later I started rejecting her more and more.

One morning before work I had a moment of clarity. This wasn't working, we stopped trying to make it work. Our daughter just turned 3, and while we did our best to keep our problems out of her life, we're not as good at separating these things as we thought we were. It was marriage counseling or divorce.

It really helped for awhile. My wife apologized, and while she still couldn't explain her beard fixation, she said she'd work to respect me more. I also promised to work harder on our marriage (I was all but checked out before), I agreed to more actively participate and enforce my boundaries. This all worked great for awhile.

And then my wife decided I had low testosterone. Why? Because 1) I had a vasectomy 3 years ago, after the birth of our daughter and 2) She lacks the ability to critically read sources on the internet. I told her we'd test it again (my doctor did a test both before and after the vasectomy, all normal) if and only if she'd promise to drop this whole topic, and just accept me for who I am.

As part of this agreement, she wanted to stop going to marriage counseling because she felt our counselor was "only understanding my side". I agreed, because why would we need counseling if she was finally going to drop it? After all that was the source of our problems. And if she brought it up again, I should just be able to enforce my boundaries and.... something. I honestly don't know what I was thinking.

Of course that test comes back normal, and surprisingly we were pretty good for a few months, it was the happiest I'd been in awhile. Until it ended about 3 months ago. At dinner one day she, out of fake concern for my health, told me that she just "heard" that testosterone boosters would help me be more energetic.

Now, I never complained about a lack of energy, our sex life was the best it's been since our daughter was born, nothing that would cause her to even think this. So I told her thanks but no thanks and left it at that. Over the next few months she'd keep bringing it up, and I started to "Gray Rock" the topic.

Then tonight, over a nice meal for my birthday (with our daughter luckily at my parents), she gave me an ultimatum. It was vital to our marriage that I "at least tried" and if I wanted to make our family work, I'd go to my doctor for a testosterone injection, and to top it all off that would be my birthday present.

Now all that old resentment came up. The loving nerve, if I at least tried? I told her she was destroying our family because she couldn't accept my body for some vague bullshit reasons she didn't even understand. I already did more than enough to try to accommodate her needs and I'm really just done with it.

She asked me again to consider trying. Naively, I asked if she meant for our marriage or to meet her impossible needs. She said the injections: she had a baby for me, she was on birth control for years, she changed her body for me. All I did was get a vasectomy, why can't I do more for her?

So I finally lost it, I let a year and a half of angst and garbage come out of my mouth, and most likely ended our marriage. Approximate quote, to show how ugly and final this was: "You've lost your god drat mind if you think any of this poo poo will work. If you were actually worth your loving education you'd stop reading bullshit blogs and listen to an actual, real, doctor when he tells you you're full of poo poo. I can't just inject some poo poo and be a better partner for you, and even if I could I loving wouldn't."

Then I left, and now I'm here at my parent's place with our daughter. Now that I write it all out I really don't know what to make of it. I really need some outside perspectives. This is over right? Where exactly did this go off the rails? What do I/we even do after this?

tl;dr: Genetically I can't really grow facial/body hair. In a short time my wife became fixated on it, then became obsessed with "fixing" it. Tonight, on my birthday, she gave me an ultimatum that turned into a huge fight. Is this really the end of it? Is there anything more to do, other than call a divorce lawyer?

# ? Sep 21, 2017 13:43

Nessa: Dec 15, 2008

lemon-lyme disease posted:

THANKS NOW I AM GOING TO HAVE NIGHTMARES.

But seriously. I knew there was a more T-rexy one than Charmander but couldn't recall the name. There's another one that might fit too. Bagon?

Wait, what IS that pok�mon?

It's Tyrunt and it's adorable.

That grandma is dumb. The kid's not going to get nightmares about the toy that he takes everywhere with him and acts like a security blanket.

Nessa fucked around with this message at 14:00 on Sep 21, 2017

# ? Sep 21, 2017 13:50

tactlessbastard: Feb 4, 2001; Godspeed, post; Fun Shoe

Nessa posted:

It's Tyrint and it's adorable.

It sure is! I think I'm going to get one for my daughters to fight over.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 13:55

Mirthless: Mar 27, 2011; by the sex ghost

Bertrand Hustle posted:

Thanks for this, the reason I don't tell people about my diagnosis is that I've spent my whole life figuring out how to not be a fuckin oblivious weirdo and it's not worth trying to explain to people.

(I mean, not here, obviously but outside of SA)

I never got a diagnosis formally but autism is a pretty good explanation for my absolutely bizarre behavior as a child and the extreme difficulty I had figuring out pretty basic social concepts. I think if I had been diagnosed it would have probably screwed me up pretty bad, tbh, the same way my EOBP diagnosis did - it's really easy to lean on a mental illness like a crutch and leverage it for sympathy when you don't want to do anything hard. As an adult I've figured out that it's better to just keep it to myself - people take me more seriously and give me more opportunities to learn and grow as a person when they don't think i'm fundamentally broken.

I advocate very heavily for holding the mentally ill accountable because most of us (even those of us with fairly severe impairments) are aware and capable enough to know that they need professional help, and it is entirely on us to seek that help and try to better ourselves.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 13:55

Outrail: Jan 4, 2009; www.sapphicrobotica.com

Hot Stunt posted:

Tonight my [31M] wife [29F] of 6 years gave me an ultimatum. The resulting fight was probably enough to end our marriage, but is this the end? Really need outside perspectives.

Lol?

Is NP nursing practitioner? This is like an architect demanding the engineer make a house out of sugar.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 13:58

Mirthless: Mar 27, 2011; by the sex ghost

Absurd Alhazred posted:

My girlfriend [24f] has hardly spoken to me [24,m] in 4 months

Doesn't seem like this has ever really been a relationship, but I think it's over either way.

Edit:

I [25F] have been exclusively dating SO [30M] for a month. We had a conversation about a threesome and I am now very confused.

quote:
and have deadlines for sending nudes of who they're sleeping with to each other in a group chat.

GROSS.

gently caress I hope she hasn't let this guy take any pictures of her

Outrail posted:

Lol?

Is NP nursing practitioner? This is like an architect demanding the engineer make a house out of sugar.

I have to wonder if there isn't more reasons she wants him to get testosterone treatment, but I think the most likely explanation is that she's the kind of person who listens to LOW T commercials on the radio and thinks they're legit

I do not blame her for wanting to be with somebody with body hair, but maybe she should have considered that before she got married to and had kids with this peachy boy (and if this was something that spontaneously developed mid-marriage, I wonder what brought it on? seems like a random thing to just start liking all of a sudden)

Mirthless fucked around with this message at 14:03 on Sep 21, 2017

# ? Sep 21, 2017 13:59

Darkhold: Feb 19, 2011; No Heart❤️
No Soul👻
No Service🙅

I guess that's the female equivalent of 'Surprise I got you a boob job for your birthday present.'

As for her being an NP everything I've heard about nurses is a huge percent of them are crazy into quack medicine for some reason. A few years ago I was in for an agonising neck spasm and when the doctor wasn't around the nurse (male in this case) ranted at me if I took any aspirin for it I'd be back in vomiting blood in no time because aspirin is super dangerous (yes I know it has some problems but jesus christ man I was in agony leave me alone with your anti-aspirin rant) and no it wasn't to do with anything I had been prescribed or any treatment I had at that point. Dude just didn't like it I guess.

Darkhold fucked around with this message at 14:10 on Sep 21, 2017

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:07

half coke half diet: Feb 3, 2006; I fight for all those men who have their nuts in a vice grip

Hot Stunt posted:

Tonight my [31M] wife [29F] of 6 years gave me an ultimatum. The resulting fight was probably enough to end our marriage, but is this the end? Really need outside perspectives.

That lady sounds like she is 3 bits short of a bitcoin. In other news, being a giant hairy gently caress myself I dont have this issue.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:09

tactlessbastard: Feb 4, 2001; Godspeed, post; Fun Shoe

Mirthless posted:

I have to wonder if there isn't more reasons she wants him to get testosterone treatment, but I think the most likely explanation is that she's the kind of person who listens to LOW T commercials on the radio and thinks they're legit

I hear a stupid series of commercials every day about 'my friend that couldn't take her wrap off during ladies day at the spa' and 'getting body back from baby' but I'd have to be pants on head crazy to march into the house and say, 'Now see here, Mrs. Bastard...'

I'm saying OP's wife...she's going nuts.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:09

Outrail: Jan 4, 2009; www.sapphicrobotica.com

Dude needs to throw that back in her face. A few testosterone injections won't kill him; 'I'll get testosterone injections because you want me to change my body for you, but you have to get liposuction, a boob job and full body laser hair removal because I'm really not attracted to your flabby, tiny titted spider haired body...Oh wait was that really insensitive?! Soz, it can be your birthday present!'

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:15

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

Get him a gym membership in return.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:17

Modus Pwnens: Dec 29, 2004

He should just get a furry costume and refuse to take it off, ever.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:20

Zzulu: May 15, 2009; (â°ËvËâ°)

I'm hairy as gently caress and I hate it

The hair on my torso hides my beautiful muscles and the hair on my face is completely pointless so I have to shave every drat morning

AND

now there's hair on my back and shoulders!! gently caress you genes!

gently caress YOU

YO poo poo

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:26

half coke half diet: Feb 3, 2006; I fight for all those men who have their nuts in a vice grip

Zzulu posted:

I'm hairy as gently caress and I hate it

The hair on my torso hides my beautiful muscles and the hair on my face is completely pointless so I have to shave every drat morning

AND

now there's hair on my back and shoulders!! gently caress you genes!

gently caress YOU

YO poo poo

Embrace the sweaty sweater, let it grow free and prosper

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:29

Fil5000: Jun 23, 2003; HOLD ON GUYS I'M POSTING ABOUT INTERNET ROBOTS

Zzulu posted:

I'm hairy as gently caress and I hate it

The hair on my torso hides my beautiful muscles and the hair on my face is completely pointless so I have to shave every drat morning

AND

now there's hair on my back and shoulders!! gently caress you genes!

gently caress YOU

YO poo poo

Have you got the nose hair yet? Because that's the real pisser.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:29

Ouhei: Oct 23, 2008; Cat Army

Holy hell that woman is insane. You don't have to be a NP to understand that some people don't have facial/body hair, like that poo poo is extremely common knowledge. The boob job comparison is pretty spot on with the added bonus of testosterone shots can have plenty of other side effects. It would be insane for a man to suggest his wife have to get a boob job to save their marriage and this is just as insane. Maybe the counselor was only seeing his side because her's is just wrong? Having a baby isn't changing her body for him, wtf?

There's so much crazy packed in that story.

Body hair loving blows anyways, I can grow a decent beard but my chest hair is spotty and dumb so I shave it and I have like 7 back hairs that I plan to laser the poo poo out of at some point.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:46

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

I feel sorry for goons who aren't either smooth as baby seals or covered in a thick tangle of luscious body hair. What does it feel like to half-rear end your own body? Shameful. That's how it should feel.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:50

Clark Nova: Jul 18, 2004

Zzulu posted:

I'm hairy as gently caress and I hate it

The hair on my torso hides my beautiful muscles and the hair on my face is completely pointless so I have to shave every drat morning

AND

now there's hair on my back and shoulders!! gently caress you genes!

gently caress YOU

YO poo poo

I know a soon-to-be-single mom who might like you. She�s a nurse practitioner so I�m sure she�s really smart and has her head screwed on straight.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:50

Mirthless: Mar 27, 2011; by the sex ghost

Ouhei posted:

Body hair loving blows anyways, I can grow a decent beard but my chest hair is spotty and dumb so I shave it and I have like 7 back hairs that I plan to laser the poo poo out of at some point.

sounds like the words of a dude jealous of other dude's body hair :smug:

body hair is rad, lots of women love it. men too.

Pvt.Scott posted:

I feel sorry for goons who aren't either smooth as baby seals or covered in a thick tangle of luscious body hair. What does it feel like to half-rear end your own body? Shameful. That's how it should feel.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 14:54

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Darkhold posted:

I guess that's the female equivalent of 'Surprise I got you a boob job for your birthday present.'

As for her being an NP everything I've heard about nurses is a huge percent of them are crazy into quack medicine for some reason. A few years ago I was in for an agonising neck spasm and when the doctor wasn't around the nurse (male in this case) ranted at me if I took any aspirin for it I'd be back in vomiting blood in no time because aspirin is super dangerous (yes I know it has some problems but jesus christ man I was in agony leave me alone with your anti-aspirin rant) and no it wasn't to do with anything I had been prescribed or any treatment I had at that point. Dude just didn't like it I guess.

Nurses are suuuuuper mental. Doctors are sociopaths. Don't get sick.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 15:02

tater_salad: Sep 15, 2007

Zzulu posted:

I'm hairy as gently caress and I hate it

The hair on my torso hides my beautiful muscles and the hair on my face is completely pointless so I have to shave every drat morning

AND

now there's hair on my back and shoulders!! gently caress you genes!

gently caress YOU

YO poo poo

Should ask Reddit dude for his wife's contact info, she can have the hairy man beast she's always read about in her Harlequin novels

# ? Sep 21, 2017 15:02

Ouhei: Oct 23, 2008; Cat Army

Mirthless posted:

sounds like the words of a dude jealous of other dude's body hair

body hair is rad, lots of women love it. men too.

Nah, I would be fine with the chest hair if it was more consistent, but back hair is gross either way.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 15:06

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Ouhei posted:

Nah, I would be fine with the chest hair if it was more consistent, but back hair is gross either way.

If you have enough back hair to nest in, it's not a bug, it's a feature.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 15:09

30 Goddamned Dicks: Sep 8, 2010; I will leave you to flounder in your cesspool of primeval soup, you sad, lonely, little cowards.; Fun Shoe

Pro tip: pretty sure it's 0% about the body hair and 100% projection of some other completely unrelated issue.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 15:13

Ouhei: Oct 23, 2008; Cat Army

30 Goddamned Dicks posted:

Pro tip: pretty sure it's 0% about the body hair and 100% projection of some other completely unrelated issue.

She doesn't think he's "man enough" and is absolutely poo poo about expressing what that means.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 15:15

tactlessbastard: Feb 4, 2001; Godspeed, post; Fun Shoe

30 Goddamned Dicks posted:

Pro tip: pretty sure it's 0% about the body hair and 100% projection of some other completely unrelated issue.

The unrelated issue being a serious mental dysfunction.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 15:18

blarzgh: Apr 14, 2009; SNITCHIN' RANDY; Grimey Drawer

30 Goddamned Dicks posted:

Pro tip: pretty sure it's 0% about the body hair and 100% projection of some other completely unrelated issue.

She's having a super lazy mid-life crisis, and is making up reasons to end the relationship that are so nebulous and weird as to be ultimately unassailable.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 15:19

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Pvt.Scott posted:

I feel sorry for goons who aren't either smooth as baby seals or covered in a thick tangle of luscious body hair. What does it feel like to half-rear end your own body? Shameful. That's how it should feel.

Can confirm :smith:

Also

30 Goddamned Dicks posted:

Pro tip: pretty sure it's 0% about the body hair and 100% projection of some other completely unrelated issue.

Kinda surprised it took this long to call it.

# ? Sep 21, 2017 15:26

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# ? Jun 12, 2024 05:36

dads friend steve: Dec 24, 2004

I can't decide who's dumber, the lady who's about to blow up her marriage over body hair or the girl who's considering staying with her scumbag threesome-pushing boyfriend of 1 month

Good poo poo this morning

# ? Sep 21, 2017 15:31

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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