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Internet Kraken
Apr 24, 2010

slightly amused

Accordion Man posted:

You do fight cosmic horrors in both. Not a strong comparison though, true.

That's a really weak connection though, given the story and themes involved aren't similar at all. In Bloodborne the otherwordly monsters you fight are the result of humans trying to reach a higher plane of knowledge and make communion with alien beings beyond their perception. In Metroid, its just space pirates injecting blue goo into everything because they are insane.

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Sakurazuka
Jan 24, 2004

NANI?

The closest Souls thing to Metroid is DS1 because of the continuous interconnected world thing, but it's still tenuous at best.

exquisite tea
Apr 21, 2007

Carly shook her glass, willing the ice to melt. "You still haven't told me what the mission is."

She leaned forward. "We are going to assassinate the bad men of Hollywood."


Everything can be like everything when your language is vague enough, just a little protip that paved the way to easy As on every college essay for me.

Unreal_One
Aug 18, 2010

Now you know how I don't like to use the sit-down gun, but this morning we just don't have time for mucking about.

A better example of a fantasy metroidvania would be... Castlevania.

exquisite tea
Apr 21, 2007

Carly shook her glass, willing the ice to melt. "You still haven't told me what the mission is."

She leaned forward. "We are going to assassinate the bad men of Hollywood."


Most Castlevanias are not even Metroidvanias. Makes you think.

Sakurazuka
Jan 24, 2004

NANI?

exquisite tea posted:

Most Castlevanias are not even Metroidvanias. Makes you think.

*galaxy brain*

The Moon Monster
Dec 30, 2005

Nina posted:

It’s easy to forget the actual TES main antagonist is a dwarven-made Evangelion unit

TES has a bunch of crazy lore but you'd never know it was anything but Ye Olde Generic Fantasy Setting from actually playing the games.

LawfulWaffle
Mar 11, 2014

Well, that aligns with the vibes I was getting. Which was, like, "normal" kinda vibes.

Internet Kraken posted:

That's a really weak connection though, given the story and themes involved aren't similar at all. In Bloodborne the otherwordly monsters you fight are the result of humans trying to reach a higher plane of knowledge and make communion with alien beings beyond their perception. In Metroid, its just space pirates injecting blue goo into everything because they are insane.

Yeah but Yharnam-ites wind up ingesting blood for everything because they are insane.

Like two sides of the same coin~ nameste

LawfulWaffle
Mar 11, 2014

Well, that aligns with the vibes I was getting. Which was, like, "normal" kinda vibes.

exquisite tea posted:

Most Castlevanias are not even Metroidvanias. Makes you think.

In the latest Retronauts podcast one of the participants argues that neither Metroid or Castlevania is a Metroidvania. Only games where you can grind for experience, stat growth and strength coupled with the exploration elements of Metroid qualify.

al-azad
May 28, 2009



LawfulWaffle posted:

In the latest Retronauts podcast one of the participants argues that neither Metroid or Castlevania is a Metroidvania. Only games where you can grind for experience, stat growth and strength coupled with the exploration elements of Metroid qualify.

I guess if we want to establish that Symphony of the Night is origin point of "Metroidvania" then literally yes. Although without checking I'm pretty sure there are more exploratory Castlevanias than linear level based ones.

Palpek
Dec 27, 2008


Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.


Propaganda Hour posted:

Well, I booted up Starcraft II today and got started on Heart of the Swarm and I just can't do it. The writing is just too unbearably insufferable. I want to like Kerrigan but her writing consists of 1) complete and total devotion to Chris Metzen self-insert Jim Raynor and 2) sexy!
Same but with the very first campaign. I like playing the maps themselves but the in-game and cutscene dialogues are no joke some of the worst writing in the entire medium, up there with janky poo poo like Exodus from the Earth (which was at least unintentionally entertaining). After one really bad character interaction too many I literally did the seinfeld_leaves_audience_reaction.gif gesture and never went back to it.

LawfulWaffle
Mar 11, 2014

Well, that aligns with the vibes I was getting. Which was, like, "normal" kinda vibes.

al-azad posted:

I guess if we want to establish that Symphony of the Night is origin point of "Metroidvania" then literally yes. Although without checking I'm pretty sure there are more exploratory Castlevanias than linear level based ones.

He argues that Zelda II is an Metroidvania

exquisite tea
Apr 21, 2007

Carly shook her glass, willing the ice to melt. "You still haven't told me what the mission is."

She leaned forward. "We are going to assassinate the bad men of Hollywood."


These are the same kind of hotdog is a sandwich people, those who boggle endlessly over the meanings of terminology that any 10-year old instinctually understands.

oddium
Feb 21, 2006

end of the 4.5 tatami age

a hot dog is obviously a sandwich though

e: for the record. so its clear

Hwurmp
May 20, 2005

hot dogs are the Dark Souls of sandwiches

CuddlyZombie
Nov 6, 2005

I wuv your brains.

Ravioli is a sandwich.

Dr Cheeto
Mar 2, 2013
Wretched Harp
Sandwich instincts

VagueRant
May 24, 2012

Edmond Dantes posted:

I still have hope. Some day...

This is The Dream. :allears:

Accordion Man posted:

Let them rest in peace. They ended on a high note and neither Gearbox nor Telltale can do them justice now.
Surely the guys who did TFTB are still at Telltale?

It's such a waste of good characters that people loved, I cannot understand it. I know Gearbox will probably poo poo it all up in Borderlands 3 (there was a lot of speculation and hope that Fiona would be a PC in a hypothetical BL3 but doooooooubt it now) but it would be nice to revisit some of them!

The Black Stones posted:

I actually really liked their Batman games. I think the new one has been fantastic as well. I’ve accepted that Telltale games are pretty much games where the story can’t be changed but you can change up how your character acts in it to change little things and that’s okay for me.

The only Telltale game I’ve truly hated was Game of Thrones. That was just a dumpster fire .
Hearing good things about Batman is actually what made me ask the question. Like TFTB and TWD were pretty linear and fake in their choices, but they had enough little things that felt like they mattered and at least delivered a fully satisfying story. I had my doubts you could do that with established characters like the Batmans, but then again, I also had my doubts that something Borderlands related would almost be game of the year 2015-17...

Yeahhhhh. The idea that GoT had more staff and budget than TFTB blows my mind.

al-azad
May 28, 2009



Really Pants posted:

hot dogs are the Dark Souls of sandwiches

Hot dogs are the open world of sandwiches. You can dress them in many ways but it's still a hotdog.

Banh mi are the Dark Souls of sandwiches. You need guts, finesse, and concentration to navigate savory pate, sharp cilantro, spicy chili peppers, sour pickled veggies, and cooling cucumbers.

exquisite tea
Apr 21, 2007

Carly shook her glass, willing the ice to melt. "You still haven't told me what the mission is."

She leaned forward. "We are going to assassinate the bad men of Hollywood."


Dork Quarrels.

FirstAidKite
Nov 8, 2009
Do you hang your toilet paper over or under




or just leave it on its side

Saint Freak
Apr 16, 2007

Regretting is an insult to oneself
Buglord
Toilet paper is for casuals.

al-azad
May 28, 2009



FirstAidKite posted:

Do you hang your toilet paper over or under




or just leave it on its side

Over for normies

Under for parents of small children or cat owners

Bidet for the hardcore :smug:

FirstAidKite
Nov 8, 2009
Someone post the ms paint animation of the dude wiping his butt by just pulling toilet paper straight from the roll and looping it between his legs. The pic that gets posted any time the goon debate about the correct way to wipe comes up.

Help Im Alive
Nov 8, 2009

I think these are all debates that have already been settled through splatfests

FirstAidKite
Nov 8, 2009

Help Im Alive posted:

I think these are all debates that have already been settled through splatfests

Gross

In Training
Jun 28, 2008

Saint Freak
Apr 16, 2007

Regretting is an insult to oneself
Buglord
Let's get this out of the way:


People who shower in the morning are maniacs.

Viewtiful Jew
Apr 21, 2007
Mench'n-a-go-go-baby!
Man people are scared to poo poo about Red Dead 2 being potentially full of microtransactons and/or lootboxes.

But more so at this point I think people are scared that no matter how much they protest, there's too many potential whales and dolphins and other aquatic life that will support the game as as service.

Unless they like, I dunno actually become vigilante outlaws and specifically attack people in whatever online mode the game will almost assuredly have who prance about town in fancy DLC clothes and horses.

There will be DLC clothes FOR your horses. Not just armor but like, fancy poo poo.

MMF Freeway
Sep 15, 2010

Later!
Don't talk to me until I've had my morning shower

oddium
Feb 21, 2006

end of the 4.5 tatami age

Saint Freak posted:

Let's get this out of the way:


People who shower in the morning are maniacs.

[casually ringing up goons.txt]

that's right... it's a big one...

Palpek
Dec 27, 2008


Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.


Saint Freak posted:

Let's get this out of the way:


People who shower in the morning are maniacs.

FauxLeather
Nov 7, 2016

Um Bongo

Saint Freak posted:

People who shower in the morning are maniacs.
I do my showers before bed too but let's not pretend we're not complete disgusting troglodytes

VideoGames
Aug 18, 2003
Just lmao if you are not living in your shower, posting from a waterproof phone.

codenameFANGIO
May 4, 2012

What are you even booing here?

No matter what you prefer you are probably scum, so game on.

oddium
Feb 21, 2006

end of the 4.5 tatami age

i bought a blind bag of a little gudetama charm and it had the one i wanted so my day is set

CJacobs
Apr 17, 2011

Reach for the moon!

Viewtiful Jew posted:

Man people are scared to poo poo about Red Dead 2 being potentially full of microtransactons and/or lootboxes.

But more so at this point I think people are scared that no matter how much they protest, there's too many potential whales and dolphins and other aquatic life that will support the game as as service.

Unless they like, I dunno actually become vigilante outlaws and specifically attack people in whatever online mode the game will almost assuredly have who prance about town in fancy DLC clothes and horses.

There will be DLC clothes FOR your horses. Not just armor but like, fancy poo poo.

Red Dead 2's multiplayer will almost certainly have those stupid Shark Cards and a way to buy your way to the first game's one hit kill gold weapons and infinite stamina horses, because they make Rockstar literal millions of dollars

Help Im Alive
Nov 8, 2009

Viewtiful Jew posted:

Man people are scared to poo poo about Red Dead 2 being potentially full of microtransactons and/or lootboxes.

But more so at this point I think people are scared that no matter how much they protest, there's too many potential whales and dolphins and other aquatic life that will support the game as as service.

Unless they like, I dunno actually become vigilante outlaws and specifically attack people in whatever online mode the game will almost assuredly have who prance about town in fancy DLC clothes and horses.

There will be DLC clothes FOR your horses. Not just armor but like, fancy poo poo.

I think they said at some point they had made like half a billion from people buying GTA Online $$$

Andrast
Apr 21, 2010


CJacobs posted:

Red Dead 2's multiplayer will almost certainly have those stupid Shark Cards and a way to buy your way to the first game's one hit kill gold weapons and infinite stamina horses, because they make Rockstar literal millions of dollars

Yeah it's more of a question whether the single player will have that garbage this time

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Viewtiful Jew
Apr 21, 2007
Mench'n-a-go-go-baby!

CJacobs posted:

Red Dead 2's multiplayer will almost certainly have those stupid Shark Cards and a way to buy your way to the first game's one hit kill gold weapons and infinite stamina horses, because they make Rockstar literal millions of dollars

At least the whales will get to live out their fantasy and be just like Dave Carradine.

I mean John.

Or do I mean Dave?

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