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Bubblyblubber
Nov 17, 2014

Smirking_Serpent posted:

i (20/f) hooked up with another girl (18) 2 days ago and she is a neo-nazi.

hi, this is my first time posting something like this.

I think that's the first time anybody has posted something like this

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Trauma Dog 3000
Aug 30, 2017

by SA Support Robot

Bubblyblubber posted:

I think that's the first time anybody has posted something like this

outside of E/N

Danaru
Jun 5, 2012

何 ??
I feel like two days is short enough to just say "yeah this ain't working out bye" :shepface: There is no reason at all to leap in front of that bullet

Palpek
Dec 27, 2008


Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.


Smirking_Serpent posted:

she has aspergers and tourettes and she's a white supremacist/neo-nazi and that if they find out that she's trans then they will kill her.
:stare:

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.
There's something extremely 2017 about that post.

Though like most internet shenanigans, I'm sure goons were ahead of the curve.

HerStuddMuffin
Aug 10, 2014

YOSPOS
That post is beautiful.

quote:

we've been together for 2 days and she says she loves me

quote:

she's staying a third night and plans to stay as many as possible until i say no i guess. i feel like im being manipulated or used. i dont know.

quote:

i feel like im going to get trapped in a hosed up relationship.

Lmao, the trap has long been sprung, she just doesn’t know about it because she hasn’t tested the bars of her new cage yet.

Lord Ludikrous
Jun 7, 2008

Enjoy your tea...

Smirking_Serpent posted:

a white supremacist neo-nazi transwoman with aspergers and tourettes

How can such a thing exist? She’s a walking contradiction.

Palpek
Dec 27, 2008


Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.


Lord Ludikrous posted:

How can such a thing exist? She’s a walking contradiction.
The Believer 2 is shaping up to be a monster.


Is it a terrible idea for me (29F) to move in with my non-committal bf (33M) of 3 years?

quote:

A little bit of background: As the title notes, I've been dating my bf for 3 years and in that 3 years, he's been extremely vague about "our future". He's rather stoic and unemotional, and has never said the words "I love you". We talked about it and he gave a long-winded answer about how he only will do or say something if he's 10000% sure of it, and he thinks that people that use the word love do it flippantly and without meaning. He said it may just be something that he'll never be comfortable doing. Ok fine, I got over that because clearly we have different love languages and at the end of the day, I'm less concerned with his words than with his actions.

About 6 months ago, I asked him where he sees our future going, and his reply was that he doesn't know. He told me he's still "gathering information" and doesn't know how we ~truly~ operate as a couple because we haven't had to make any big decisions together. We discussed living together, and while he agreed that it's something he'd want to do, he wasn't very excited about it. From this conversation, over-eager me started bringing it up more and talking about it, but he was comfortable with his place and commute and didn't really respond because the timing wasn't right.

Fast forward to now, and he just landed a new job that's about a 2 hour commute from his current place. After doing the commute for a week, now he is suddenly gung-ho about finding a place together (right in between his work and mine). I should note that right now I live in a super cheap studio (for SF) within walking distance to my work, so moving for me would increase my commute time and commute $. All of which I would be totally willing to do...but this is where I need help.

I feel like we've been dating for 3 years, and moving in together would be a step on the way to marriage/family. I see it as a sign of commitment, and (seeing as I'm nearing 30), want him to be on the same page. He views moving in together as another data point in his evaluation of me as marriage-material, and from there would probably (?) decide whether or not he's in it for the long haul. Of course he didn't SAY that in those words. I don't want to get married right now, and of course I want to live with a future spouse before committing to marry them, but I guess I feel like marriage/long-term commitment should be the default plan when moving in, and then if it doesn't work it doesn't work. Whereas he sees this as just a step to question mark / figure it out later. I'm terrified of being strung along for another 3 years with this guy only to end up getting dumped in my mid-30s because it just isn't right, or some other bullshit.

I'm planning on talking to him tonight about some of my concerns, but I want to make sure I express myself without becoming that girl that says "ring on it or bail". What I want to ask is for a timeline from him on after we move in together, when he would want to be engaged/married/etc. That seems wayyyyy too..hmm...naggy (?), but its the gist of what I want to know. Am I justified to want more commitment from my boyfriend before moving in with him? Are there any guys out there that felt like my boyfriend, unsure about their partner after a significant amount of time, but after a few years and living together, suddenly wanted to settle down with them?

I barely slept last night because I kept thinking of different ways I could have this conversation, and kept coming back to well, maybe I just want too much too soon. Maybe this IS truly how well-functioning relationships go, and I'm trying to rush it and destroy it. Sigh. Any help/advice/anecdotes would be greatly appreciated. Thank you! =)

tl;dr: Boyfriend of 3 years "doesn't know" about our future- is moving in with him a good idea?
beep boop error error

Absurd Alhazred
Mar 27, 2010

by Athanatos

Palpek posted:

The Believer 2 is shaping up to be a monster.


Is it a terrible idea for me (29F) to move in with my non-committal bf (33M) of 3 years?

beep boop error error

Marry him first. That way if he bleep blorp dumps you in 3 years you're likelier to get something for your trouble.

Tender Bender
Sep 17, 2004

Bertrand Hustle posted:

I am a total loving nerd who is literally autistic and I lift weights

lift a weight, do a sport

nerds

Lifting weights is an awesome nerd hobby, it scratches the progression/"numbers go up" itch of an MMO and is actually good for you, makes you feel better and look better, and is less time consuming.

navier-stoked
Aug 30, 2004

:boom:

Khorne
May 1, 2002

Anony Mouse posted:

Girlfriend [23F] won't have sex with me [24M] unless I win my wrestling matches
This is actually awesome. This guy is so bothered by it. It's hilarious.

Haifisch posted:

I (28F) don't feel any "empathy" towards children

"Quotation marks."
If a 1 year old dies you can have another 1 year old in like 2 years tops. If a 30 year old dies it takes 31 years to replace them. However, if a 1 year old dies 84 years of potential life were taken away but if a 70 year old dies only 8 years of potential life were taken away. Really makes you think.

It sounds like she does feel "empathy" "towards" "children" she just doesn't over react.

almightyerin posted:

There are so many other things to throw in someones yard to gently caress it up. Why in gods name do you pick chili? How loving Texan.
Can I sue my neighbor who caused massive amounts of damage to my property while I was gone on vacation? Gee, I don't know. This one is a real thinker.

coolskull
Nov 11, 2007

Khorne posted:

This is actually awesome. This guy is so bothered by it. It's hilarious.

if your motivation for doing something is to deride your partner that is not awesome

Clark Nova
Jul 18, 2004

He should win a match then publicly dump her rear end, ringside

sexpig by night
Sep 8, 2011

by Azathoth

HerStuddMuffin posted:

That post is beautiful.




Lmao, the trap has long been sprung, she just doesn’t know about it because she hasn’t tested the bars of her new cage yet.

*standing with my leg deep in a bear trap*

"Startin to think I'm in danger of being trapped here..."

Blade Runner
Aug 14, 2015

American History X sequel shaping up to be good

Khorne
May 1, 2002

LOVE LOVE SKELETON posted:

if your motivation for doing something is to deride your partner that is not awesome
In the actual post, it's literally for that night only. It's not until he wins again or something. She has every right to say no to him even if the reason is dumb, and I'm not convinced that's even a particularly dumb reason given that it's playful to her.

Admiral Ray
May 17, 2014

Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

Anony Mouse posted:

Girlfriend [23F] won't have sex with me [24M] unless I win my wrestling matches

Get better at wrestling before she leaves you for the state champ.

cumshitter
Sep 27, 2005

by Fluffdaddy
Lady tricked into dating the neo nazi should totally check their ID. Sanity issues aside an 18 year old willing to drive two hours and move in permanently after the first date might not be totally forthcoming about their actual age.

Demon Of The Fall
May 1, 2004

Nap Ghost
I wonder if there's a case of someone with Tourette's that sig heils as one of their tics.

Meme Poker Party
Sep 1, 2006

by Azathoth

Demon Of The Fall posted:

I wonder if there's a case of someone with Tourette's that sig heils as one of their tics.

If internet tales are to be believed then yes there is (or at least was). Some teenager that couldn't stop raising his arm in an unfortunate way, and one day he got punched in the face by a black guy on the subway.

I can't remember where I read it though, sorry.

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

Smirking_Serpent posted:


tl;dr i (20/f) hooked up with a aspergers

:barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf::barf:

Crespolini
Mar 9, 2014

Clark Nova posted:

He should win a match then publicly dump her rear end, ringside

If he did that it'd be funny, and if he doesn't he's a spineless worm fit only be mocked. The man who loves to laugh wins either way, imo

Hello Ketene
Dec 30, 2011
My girlfriend won't meet share a bed, or have sex with me and won't tell why. What should I do?

quote:

I have been with this girl, for four years. We both met in Undergrad and graduated together in the same class. This Monday was our 4th anniversary and we went out on the town and had a romantic night. We saw a show, had dinner, the works. When I pulled up to her apartment to drop her off for the night, we started making out getting a little frisky but then all of a sudden she breaks the kiss, says she has to go because she has some paper due for her Grad class. I apologize for holding her up and then let her out of my car and told her good night. On the drive home it hit me, this ALWAYS happens. Anytime we get a little passionate she immediarely freezes up and makes up some excuse and leaves.

The next day I tried talking to her about it but she refused to talk to me about it, she just said she wasnt ready and when i asked why she felt she wasn't ready she just replied "I don't know, I'm just not ready". I am my girlfriends first lover and she is still a virgin so I can understand why she may be apprehensive when it comes to sex. The farthest we ever go is hands stuff, and thats entirely 100% on her end (i do handstuff to her, she doesn't even touch me). The second i bring up the thought of me getting in on the action she looks at me like i just asked her to kill a puppy with her barehands and just says again "I'm not ready". Again when asked she says the same thing. Same thing applies when i bring up sleeping together. She tried to tell me that her mother wouldn't let us sleep together, but even now that she's out on her own she still says again "I'm not ready" and won't give me a reason. I even tried planning a romantic getaway but she refused to stay in the same room as me unless i got two beds. It lead to an agrumentband i just cancelled the trip outright. Again when talked about it and made up i asked her again why she didn't want to and once again the same answer "I'm not ready" .

Thats the answer to ANY question relating to intimacy. I love her to death and I don't mind waiting but I just want to know why. Anytime I try to talk to her it's the same answers, and the same look, it's driving me insane. I don't want to make her uncomfortable and force the issue or do anything to make her feel uncomfortable but i really have no clue what to do! Am I being unreasonable, i have no idea i'm so lost and confused.

Edit: a few glaring typeos and i forgot to add something.

welp, 4 years

The Ferret King
Nov 23, 2003

cluck cluck

Khorne posted:

In the actual post, it's literally for that night only. It's not until he wins again or something. She has every right to say no to him even if the reason is dumb, and I'm not convinced that's even a particularly dumb reason given that it's playful to her.

Lol you can have her then. I'd drop her rear end so fast.

She has every right to say no to the next guy for whatever dumb loving reason she wants.

Esoteric Scientist posted:

My girlfriend won't meet share a bed, or have sex with me and won't tell why. What should I do?


welp, 4 years

Marry her, duh.

corn on the cop
Oct 12, 2012

Break what must be broken, once for all, that's all, and take the suffering on oneself.

― Corey Dostoyevsky
My [31M] boyfriend left me [28f] at a fair because I took too long in the bathroom and thinks it's my fault

quote:

Me 28f, him 31m, dating about 5 months but 2 months exclusive. I have IBS which I've told him about but he hasn't really experienced much as I'm careful about my triggers when out, but I have told him I need to have a bathroom accessible and that I have some intolerances and issues so I'm careful of what I eat out.

We went to the opening of a winter wonderland thing which was like a fair withice skating and local food stalls. Dunno what I ate but my stomach starts cramping and I tell him embarrassed that my IBS is flaring up and I might be a while in the rest room. Phone signal is sketchy so I tell him I'll find hi next to the skating rink once I'm done. I'm in the loo about 40 mins which I feel terrible about, then I can't find him.

I text him, try calling, then wait at the rink for a further hour. Nothing. He was my ride so I have to get a taxi home. Send him more msgs. Still nothing 4 hours later, gone midnight. I'm genuinely worried thinking maybe he was injured or mugged or something so I msg his sister on Facebook (they share a house) and she says he came home drunk hours ago.

He says I took so long he assumed I'd gone home.. even tho he'd driven, claims he texted me but it never went through and he decided to go out with some buddies since I had ditched him and then didn't check his msgs.

I'm so annoyed, confused and frustrated, and he's not apologised just said no one ever takes that long in the rest room and he was just being logical and assumed it was a bad date. He then even accused me of taking so long deliberately as a test and said he wasn't a dog to be left waiting outside and I should be aware not to play games with him. I really liked him but now I'm thinking this is a deal breaker but the friends I've asked for advice also really like him and say tis is clearly just a miscommunication issue.

tl;dr boyfriend left me at a fair because I took too long in the bathroom, refuses to apologise and even thinks I was faking it to play games with him. Friends seem to think I'm making too big a deal over it but I'm genuinely baffled and freaked out by his actions in this situation.

Barudak
May 7, 2007

Esoteric Scientist posted:

My girlfriend won't meet share a bed, or have sex with me and won't tell why. What should I do?


welp, 4 years

Your girlfriend is a Chicken Boo.

Submarine Sandpaper
May 27, 2007


corn on the cop posted:

My [31M] boyfriend left me [28f] at a fair because I took too long in the bathroom and thinks it's my fault

irritable boyfriend syndrome am i right?

corn on the cop
Oct 12, 2012

Break what must be broken, once for all, that's all, and take the suffering on oneself.

― Corey Dostoyevsky
I (23f) found my BF (23m) of 1 year sleeping in the same bed with his ex (30f). He says it was ONLY to keep her from drunk driving, I just don't know what to believe or be the idiot with blinders on but he's always been honest with me.

quote:

So this is one of those situations where I know what I saw and that counters very much with what I want to believe. I've been dating "Matt" for a little over a year and he's a great guy. I've never really had a "bad" relationship but I also never realized that I'd never had a great relationship either. I'm deeply in love with him and see myself with him forever.

That't not to say he's not without baggage however, he has this ex-GF "Shania" who is a train wreck in every respect. She's 7 years older than him and targeted him when his dad died when he was 17. They had an on and off roller coaster of relationship that included a baby boy being born. Shania convinced Justin that the baby (JT) was his so for the first year he was the father figure, out of the blue a dude appeared and after some DNA testing, Matt is not the dad. But Matt got really attached to the kid so he remains in his life as more of a big brother figure. The kid's real dad is already gone and Matt feels like he's the only stability JT will ever know. As such we deal with Shania way more than I would like. JT is a great kid and I really like him and I too feel Matt (maybe we) are the only chance he has at a stable life.

Fast forward to this weekend, I had to work (bartender) late so I decided to surprise Matt with some intimate time at his apartment after I got off work Saturday/Sunday morning. I let myself in and he met me at his bedroom door and shut it behind me. I told him what I was up to and he said it just wasn't a good time. I asked him what the hell that meant and he said we needed to talk about it tomorrow. I said that was bullshit because I knew something was up so I slammed the door open and there was Shania sleeping in his bed.

He asked me to please not freak out that it wasn't what it looked like. I told him it couldn't possibly be anything else and I'm not an idiot. I ran out of his apartment really screaming and crying because i was devastated. I went home and tried to sleep but nothing.

Matt came over at like 8 AM, begging to talk with me. At first I didn't want to talk but I relented. His explanation is basically that Shania showed up completely plastered and started all sorts of drama that if Matt didn't talk to him he would never see JT again. He said that had a terrible screaming match and she threatened to leave and plow into another car if he didn't keep talking to her. He said that his only option was to let her sleep it off so she didn't hurt herself or someone else.

I want to believe him but I literally saw another woman in his bed. He's never been dishonest with me ever, but I mean...I saw another woman in his bed.

I haven't talked with him since Sunday because I'm terrible at handing conflict but I'm just so confused and don't know what to do. Do I believe him or is this the end?

tl;dr: I found my BF's ex in his bed on Sunday morning. He says it was to keep her from drunk driving. I don't know what to believe.

please don't take him back

Clark Nova
Jul 18, 2004

It's awful nice of him to gently caress that girl so that she doesn't have to drive home drunk.

Bunni-kat
May 25, 2010

Service Desk B-b-bunny...
How can-ca-caaaaan I
help-p-p-p you?

corn on the cop posted:

I (23f) found my BF (23m) of 1 year sleeping in the same bed with his ex (30f). He says it was ONLY to keep her from drunk driving, I just don't know what to believe or be the idiot with blinders on but he's always been honest with me.


please don't take him back

He hosed her.

If his story was legit: You put the ex in the bed and you go on the couch. AND YOU TELL YOUR GIRLFRIEND BEFORE SHE SHOWS UP.

MF_James
May 8, 2008
I CANNOT HANDLE BEING CALLED OUT ON MY DUMBASS OPINIONS ABOUT ANTI-VIRUS AND SECURITY. I REALLY LIKE TO THINK THAT I KNOW THINGS HERE

INSTEAD I AM GOING TO WHINE ABOUT IT IN OTHER THREADS SO MY OPINION CAN FEEL VALIDATED IN AN ECHO CHAMBER I LIKE

Avenging_Mikon posted:

He hosed her.

If his story was legit: You put the ex in the bed and you go on the couch. AND YOU TELL YOUR GIRLFRIEND BEFORE SHE SHOWS UP.

He didn't know she was going to show up, but the rest is correct yes.

If he HAD been sleeping on the couch and her in the bed, I could (somewhat) understand not wanting to open the can of worms by telling your current GF that your ex-gf-not-quite-baby-mama showed up plastered and threatened crazy poo poo, but yeah that didn't happen so this dude was def loving shananananaia

Admiral Ray
May 17, 2014

Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

corn on the cop posted:

My [31M] boyfriend left me [28f] at a fair because I took too long in the bathroom and thinks it's my fault

Dump him. Hell, take a 40 minute dump on him to show him it can happen.

Adam Vegas
Apr 14, 2013



Clark Nova posted:

It's awful nice of him to gently caress that girl so that she doesn't have to drive home drunk.

Admiral Ray
May 17, 2014

Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

corn on the cop posted:

I (23f) found my BF (23m) of 1 year sleeping in the same bed with his ex (30f). He says it was ONLY to keep her from drunk driving, I just don't know what to believe or be the idiot with blinders on but he's always been honest with me.


please don't take him back

Tell him it's you or her because this crazy woman will destroy your life if you keep her in it.

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

Don't forget Hitler's contributions to medicine.

corn on the cop posted:

I (23f) found my BF (23m) of 1 year sleeping in the same bed with his ex (30f). He says it was ONLY to keep her from drunk driving, I just don't know what to believe or be the idiot with blinders on but he's always been honest with me.


please don't take him back

Eh....

I'm still friends with my ex, my partner is still really good friends with his ex, in fact I met him through his ex. Trust me, if my ex and me slept in the same bed NOTHING would happen and I wouldn't think twice if my partner slept in the same bed as his ex. Sometimes it is so, so, so over that you just don't have to worry about it.

Kuros
Sep 13, 2010

Oh look, the consequences of my prior actions are finally catching up to me.

Anony Mouse posted:

Girlfriend [23F] won't have sex with me [24M] unless I win my wrestling matches

Spicy emotional manipulation there. Dump her rear end.

Milotic
Mar 4, 2009

9CL apologist
Slippery Tilde
Miss O. Blivious right here:

My fiancee [27F] doesn't tell me [27F] where she goes

quote:

u/AcquirableKlimt
I dated my fiancee for 10 years, and we got engaged 7 years ago. We've essentially been together for the entirety of our adult lives, and I can't imagine a life without her.

My fiancee has always been close with her parents, who really do hate me. They make me feel unwelcome when I'm in their house- not hugging me, not making eye contact, leaving a room when I enter, talking about me to my fiancee, accusing me of stealing from them. In short, I don't try to make a lot of time for them. My fiancee, on the other hand, loves to hang out with them- even though they live 2 hours away.

My fiancee has also had issues with sobriety and infidelity, though she's resolved both through counseling. We went to therapy together, and reached the agreement that we need transparency and honesty in our relationship. If I go somewhere, she needs to know. If she goes somewhere, I need to know.

She's failing to keep her end of the bargain. Four months ago, I had a bad day and wanted to get dinner with my fiancee. When I came home, she wasn't there. I called her, no answer. Called again ten minutes later, she tells me she's busy. I ask where she is, and she's hanging out with her parents at their house.

Four days after that, she pulls the disappearing act again. This time, we had plans to go see a movie and spend some time together. I call, and she's hanging out with friends a half hour away. According to her, she "forgot."

After that, I would come home every handful of days to find the house empty, the dog unwalked, and no note left. Each time I called, she'd either be up at her parents' house, hanging out with friends. On one excursion, she was at the airport, having "forgotten" to tell me that she was flying out for business. I got kind of paranoid, and thought about calling her work, but I decided to tone down my crazy and mellow out. I figured I should trust her.

Now, I'm at my wits end. These business trips have been springing up out of the blue for a while now, and sometimes I don't know where she is until she's halfway across the country. Other times, she goes missing from work, only to turn up at her parents' house. I wake up with an empty bed, and after a fifteen minute interrogation, she says she's at a friend's place getting breakfast. Part of me feels this is a huge red flag. But the other part of me thinks this might just be me blowing stuff out of proportion. She never shows signs of being drunk, and nothing is too suspicious in terms of her possibly cheating.

Am I right in thinking I should have a little notice? Or is this just something that will pass? And how can I address it? What are my next steps? I'm completely lost.

TL;DR: My fiancee of 7 years doesn't tell me where she goes- even when she travels cross-country.

I also thought 7 years is a long time to be engaged, then I realised they were probably not able to be lawfully married for a good chunk of that time depending on their country / state.

Admiral Ray
May 17, 2014

Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

Milotic posted:

Miss O. Blivious right here:

My fiancee [27F] doesn't tell me [27F] where she goes


I also thought 7 years is a long time to be engaged, then I realised they were probably not able to be lawfully married for a good chunk of that time depending on their country / state.

Oh no you're being too harsh here lots of people just randomly up and leave to go out without telling their SO's and they never go do stuff like gently caress other people on the pretext of sudden "business trips".

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tactlessbastard
Feb 4, 2001

Godspeed, post
Fun Shoe

Three Olives posted:

Eh....

I'm still friends with my ex, my partner is still really good friends with his ex, in fact I met him through his ex. Trust me, if my ex and me slept in the same bed NOTHING would happen and I wouldn't think twice if my partner slept in the same bed as his ex. Sometimes it is so, so, so over that you just don't have to worry about it.

We don't all live in the barrio where there aren't enough beds to go around. Sorry you and all your exes are having to share cots in the lean to.

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