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I hate to say goodbye, so my plan is to have everyone killed and buried with me at my funeral.
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Dec 8, 2017 02:25
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Caufman posted:I hate to say goodbye, so my plan is to have everyone killed and buried with me at my funeral. "Ah, I see Sir would like our Egyptian package."
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Dec 8, 2017 02:54
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I don't want anybody to cry at my funeral so I will have a series of fake funerals. When I actually die no one will come. My friends and families won't be sad when I die because they will all believe me to still be alive, just perpetuating yet another of my hoax funerals, the most elaborate yet!
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Dec 8, 2017 03:42
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Guy Goodbody posted:I don't want anybody to cry at my funeral so I will have a series of fake funerals. When I actually die no one will come. My friends and families won't be sad when I die because they will all believe me to still be alive, just perpetuating yet another of my hoax funerals, the most elaborate yet! How many fake funerals until one of them gets fed up and kills you for real? Then they'll know you're dead.
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Dec 8, 2017 03:53
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Karate Bastard posted:There's this trick you can do to if Mike is swollen and unable to take care of it himself, where you just sort of flick it in a certain way like you're snapping your fingers and that'll deflate it. Or you can just pinch down real hard on the ballsack, like real real hard, hard as you can. There's a deflation valve in there that'll make the problem go away like instantly. My aunt's a nurse and she told me they used to carry tea spoons in their pockets. If a patient got an erection while being bathed, a quick flick to the head of the penis with the spoon would very quickly cause it to detumesce.
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Dec 8, 2017 03:54
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I'm going to have a series of fake funerals, each more baffling than the last, until the mourners follow the series of clues and, at the very end of the trail, are so infuriated with me that they murder me, thus making the entire merry chase and my ultimate demise the most perfect death and mourning in the history of human civilization
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Dec 8, 2017 03:56
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Gorilla Salad posted:My aunt's a nurse and she told me they used to carry tea spoons in their pockets. If a patient got an erection while being bathed, a quick flick to the head of the penis with the spoon would very quickly cause it to detumesce. I'm ready for my sponge bath, better tell her to bring a ladle
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Dec 8, 2017 04:32
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Gorilla Salad posted:My aunt's a nurse and she told me they used to carry tea spoons in their pockets. If a patient got an erection while being bathed, a quick flick to the head of the penis with the spoon would very quickly cause it to detumesce. 
Wolfechu has a new favorite as of 04:35 on Dec 8, 2017 |
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Dec 8, 2017 04:32
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Proteus Jones posted:"Ah, I see Sir would like our Egyptian package." Unless you suggest I simply toxify the planet at the point of my death, making Earth my tomb.
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Dec 8, 2017 04:35
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Gorilla Salad posted:My aunt's a nurse and she told me they used to carry tea spoons in their pockets. If a patient got an erection while being bathed, a quick flick to the head of the penis with the spoon would very quickly cause it to detumesce. That's not going to do anything to someone who's into CBT
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Dec 8, 2017 04:44
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We Know Catheters posted:That's not going to do anything to someone who's into CBT Cognitive Behavioral Therapy??
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Dec 8, 2017 04:46
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Dreddout posted:I miss Vine How did it not become the next big thing? 5 second stories is a fantastic idea, there are so many examples.
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Dec 8, 2017 04:52
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96 Port Hub posted:Cognitive Behavioral Therapy?? Cock and Ball Torture
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Dec 8, 2017 04:52
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Glazier posted:Cock and Ball Torture No wonder my last therapist was useless and always wearing leather.
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Dec 8, 2017 04:56
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Dreddout posted:I miss Vine Nuts and Gum posted:How did it not become the next big thing? 5 second stories is a fantastic idea, there are so many examples. You're in luck, supposedly Vine 2 is on the way http://bgr.com/2017/12/06/vine-2-new-app-announced-co-founder/
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Dec 8, 2017 04:58
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Glazier posted:Cock and Ball Torture That explains why the police were afraid of Ice Cube
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Dec 8, 2017 05:21
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Nuts and Gum posted:How did it not become the next big thing? 5 second stories is a fantastic idea, there are so many examples. Because things need to create literally any income
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Dec 8, 2017 05:25
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Gorilla Salad posted:detumesce I just learned a new word, a good word, a drat funny word.
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Dec 8, 2017 05:59
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Must be one of them Irish boarding schools.
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Dec 8, 2017 08:08
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We Know Catheters posted:That's not going to do anything to someone who's into CBT  Ok guys so if this guy tries to tell you about catheters DON'T LISTEN
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Dec 8, 2017 09:16
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*shh* i know catheters / 
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Dec 8, 2017 09:16
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Haha
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Dec 8, 2017 09:39
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Field trip to Willy Wonka's chocolate factory, pretty standard.
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Dec 8, 2017 10:05
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Karate Bastard posted:
it wasnt until this post that i realized cbt wasn't some obscure medical treatment
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Dec 8, 2017 10:09
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The first time I was in a thread and people were saying how much CBT helped them with their issues was a surreal experience.
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Dec 8, 2017 10:19
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That better be mud mister. E: btw is that "know" as in "carnal knowledge"? Karate Bastard has a new favorite as of 11:04 on Dec 8, 2017 |
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Dec 8, 2017 10:39
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Phlegmish posted:Must be one of them Irish boarding schools. More likely, it's a Swedish establishment, I would say.
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Dec 8, 2017 10:49
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DrBouvenstein posted:I got this in an email from Vanguard to vote on their board...I ahve never seen a list of whiter white-person names in my life: I have 
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Dec 8, 2017 11:22
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Couldn't stop thinking about this so I did it
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Dec 8, 2017 11:23
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Beachcomber posted:The first time I was in a thread and people were saying how much CBT helped them with their issues was a surreal experience. C torture is fine, but leave me out of the whole B torture thing.
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Dec 8, 2017 11:25
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The Sausages posted:I have i started using these names on dating sites
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Dec 8, 2017 11:32
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Do Sim kids still do the hing where they just start laughing for no real reason? Seems like that would take on a more sinister cast.
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Dec 8, 2017 13:11
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AKA Pseudonym posted:Do Sim kids still do the hing where they just start laughing for no real reason? buddy, wait until you find out about real kids
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Dec 8, 2017 13:13
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Dec 8, 2017 13:46
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Is...is a craigie a penis? Cause if it is, this new version is going places.
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Dec 8, 2017 14:08
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I would legit read this edition.
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Dec 8, 2017 14:36
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Huh? It's just Harry Potter in Scots?
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Dec 8, 2017 14:37
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Paladinus posted:Huh? It's just Harry Potter in Scots? It is indeit
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Dec 8, 2017 14:38
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Zamboni_Rodeo posted:I would legit read this edition. https://www.amazon.com/Harry-Potter-Philosophers-Stane-Stone/dp/1785301543
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Dec 8, 2017 14:39
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Sweet, thanks! 
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Dec 8, 2017 14:41
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