/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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The_end: May 17, 2014

ArbitraryC posted:

what exactly did they do? How could he write this many words without describing a single useful thing to comment on.

Schizophrenia starts presenting itself around 18 years old.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 00:17

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# ? Jun 12, 2024 18:46

La Brea Carpet: Nov 22, 2007; I have no mouth and I must post

I (25f) am not the Manic Pixie Geek Girl my boyfriend (27m) wants. How can I get it through to him? 3 years together.

quote:

Jake and I have been together for about 3 years. In that time, we've gotten to know each other very well. But there's just one big issue between us: he's a serial killer. No, of course not really, but the issue is that he has it in his mind that I am some geeky girl.

To be honest, I do not understand where he got the idea. Nothing about me, bar my appearance maybe, would clue anyone into the idea that I'm one of those girls. I don't play video games aside from trying the latest colorful timewasters, I'm bored to tears by things like Star Wars or Star Trek, and I'm not into night time fantasy soap operas like Game of Thrones or The Walking Dead.

But somewhere in there, my boyfriend got this idea that I love all that stuff, and that I want to share it all with him. Now, I don't mind him dragging me along to the occasional Star Wars movie or sitting through the occasional episde of his favorite TV shows. I smile and nod and just do my knitting or whatever and accept that we aren't going to agree on everything.

But like for example, hanging out with our friends recently, he was like, "Oh, we're all going to go see Star Wars opening night! It'll be so awesome. SquareTop is so excited for it."

And I'm like...er... I'd rather not stay up all night to see a movie I don't even want to see. And I've literally never said or indicated I was excited for anything Star Wars related, aside from maybe reading the memoirs of that chick who died.

I told him that later, in private, and he just smiled and nodded and said "Just you wait, you'll love it!"

It happens all the time. I feel like he wants me to role play being some rainbow hair colored YouTube gamer girl who thinks Jon Snow is like, so dreamy. And there's nothing wrong with that kind of girl. It's just not me. I am not someone who is defined by the media I consume, and I don't want to be. I don't want my whole life to be about what games I like to play or what franchises I'm into or Team DC or Team Marvel or any of that.

How do I get this across to him? How can I politely excuse myself of the banality of sitting through more of the Star Wars movies, or other things? I don't make him sit there and watch me knit or crochet or sew things. I don't bore him to death telling him about the books I've read.

I'll tell him if I read something super interesting, but it's usually a passing "Oh, I read this. It was pretty cool." And then I find other book people to talk to it about.

Do I need to find him geeky friends?

tl;dr: Boyfriend wants me to be his little Manic Pixie Geek Girl. I am so not the girl. How can I get him to really, truly understand that?

# ? Dec 9, 2017 01:05

Shugojin: Sep 6, 2007; THE TAIL THAT BURNS TWICE AS BRIGHT...

You say gently caress off and leave

# ? Dec 9, 2017 01:11

coolskull: Nov 11, 2007

three years of begging him to talk about something, anything but chewbacca

# ? Dec 9, 2017 01:19

La Brea Carpet: Nov 22, 2007; I have no mouth and I must post

I [26, F] purposely became pregnant to keep the guy [26, M] I was in a regular threesome with. I know I'm horrible, I just want to know how to continue and what's best for the situation

quote:

Hello, I know I'm going to get a lot of hate for this and how extremely long this is. There's nothing I can do about it at this point except face reality and get some help. I've started seeing a therapist about my depression and my first visit was Monday, it went super well. And yes, I'm staying single for a long time, I'm going to focus on getting myself in a better state and focus on being the best mom I can be.

A little history on this- I was in a very physically and mentally abusive relationship from when I was 17-23. I don't want to go into too much detail but I was stuck for a very long time. I didn't know how to get out and was constantly belittled. He took away my pride, my self confidence, and a lot more.

I got out of after my 23rd birthday with the help of my best friend (female). We got an apartment together shortly after and I started a very nice office job, I started getting my life together finally.

I didn't want to trust men for a while, I casually started dating around and hooking up, but NSA and no feelings involved. This went on for over a year and a half and then I met this couple [M, 25] [F, 24] that I ended up having a threesome with on and off for 5 months. We all clicked super well and I started having regular hook ups with them. Rules were that it was NSA and that I couldn't see them separately, only as a couple.

Well I ended up crushing on the guy (he treated me well, made me feel wanted, and he's beyond gorgeous) and I really started to feel like I was falling in love with him. The girlfriend became kind of a friend for me, but I couldn't hold back any longer and I tried to initiate sex just with the boyfriend. He wouldn't, said it was against the agreement. I told him I was catching feelings and that I think me and him have a strong connection and we should see where it goes. He told me no, said he loved his girlfriend and apologized that this isn't working out, and that it might be best for me if we all stopped. I went home and cried for what seemed forever. Finally a guy that I feel connected and close with, and I thought I'd never have that back. I drank too much for a couple days, and became super depressed when he never called me. I was hoping he'd change his mind. So I took off my patch (BC) and then a few weeks later I called them and told them I wanted to apologize and have a drink. We all went out and I explained that I was in a bad spot and that I latched on because I was hurt by my other relationship. I told them I don't want to lose the fun we all have together. So we all hosed that night and started our weekly think again for a few months. I was late and took a test, said it was positive.

I set up a meeting with the boyfriend and told him I have something important to tell him. I told me I got pregnant. He freaked out, and left. They called me back that night and we all met up. They asked me what I wanted to do and said I'm against abortion (which is true) and that I'm keeping it. They said that they respect my decision and that we're all going to work it out. Here's what ruined me- they weren't breaking up. They are still staying together. My delusional mind banked on the thought that this guy would leave her if I got pregnant and would stay with me. They said that we would work out shared custody.

Reddit, I know how bad I hosed up. Super hosed up. I know what an evil thing it was to do and I am so ashamed. But I've always wanted kids and can't give up this baby. How do I go about working this out with them? Would it be shared custody between me and him or would she be involved? I'm getting a lawyer, I'm just so scared. I'm 18 weeks.

TL;DR: I was not in a right state of mind and got pregnant on purpose to trap a guy I was sleeping with in a threesome with his girlfriend in hopes that he would leave her. They are staying together and want shared custody

Edit- They will not stand for adoption. Even though it would hurt me, I would do what's best for the baby. But they want partial custody and they want paternal rights. I guess they're thinking marriage in the near future and said that they're ready for this.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 01:20

Bunni-kat: May 25, 2010; Service Desk B-b-bunny...
How can-ca-caaaaan I
help-p-p-p you?

La Brea Carpet posted:

I (25f) am not the Manic Pixie Geek Girl my boyfriend (27m) wants. How can I get it through to him? 3 years together.

Guy is a bit of a dick, but how does he act when she picks the activity? He could just want her to show some form of interest in his interests. Sounds like she mostly gets huffy and ignores his nerd poo poo. They should really break up.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 01:37

Jeza: Feb 13, 2011; The cries of the dead are terrible indeed; you should try not to hear them.

lol the girl from redpill nightmares coagulated together and took on life

# ? Dec 9, 2017 01:49

13Pandora13: Nov 5, 2008; I've got tiiits that swingle dangle dingle

Avenging_Mikon posted:

Guy is a bit of a dick, but how does he act when she picks the activity? He could just want her to show some form of interest in his interests. Sounds like she mostly gets huffy and ignores his nerd poo poo. They should really break up.

They're his interests, not hers, she doesn't have to show interest in them and has been accommodating. He needs to get over himself or break up.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 01:51

Jeza: Feb 13, 2011; The cries of the dead are terrible indeed; you should try not to hear them.

also that dude is a big r-r-r-retard for hooking up again after she propositioned him repeatedly to cheat on his gf. and his gf too for hearing her story and thinking "im ok with this"

# ? Dec 9, 2017 01:54

Bunni-kat: May 25, 2010; Service Desk B-b-bunny...
How can-ca-caaaaan I
help-p-p-p you?

13Pandora13 posted:

They're his interests, not hers, she doesn't have to show interest in them and has been accommodating. He needs to get over himself or break up.

Again, I say they should break up, but really? You don�t show interest in what your partner likes? Even if it�s just to let them ramble on excitedly? �Cause this lady is rolling her eyes and sighing at it.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 02:01

13Pandora13: Nov 5, 2008; I've got tiiits that swingle dangle dingle

Avenging_Mikon posted:

Again, I say they should break up, but really? You don�t show interest in what your partner likes? Even if it�s just to let them ramble on excitedly? �Cause this lady is rolling her eyes and sighing at it.

She indulged going to movies, watching shows, etc. she expressed disinterest in and he continues to foist them upon her. If someone isn't interested in something and you prattle on about it to them constantly, you're the inconsiderate one, not them.

This is why that whole "my SO is my best friend" thing is so ridiculous and toxic because it reinforces this idea you should have completely matched interests at all costs. He needs to go do that stuff with his geeky friends. She's not obligated to force herself to fake enjoy something she dislikes.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 02:28

Barudak: May 7, 2007

La Brea Carpet posted:

I [26, F] purposely became pregnant to keep the guy [26, M] I was in a regular threesome with. I know I'm horrible, I just want to know how to continue and what's best for the situation

So whats best is you transfer all rights to them and you get your tubes tied. Later you and them grow up to destroy the mind of your child who walks in on you having a threeway and in a single moment realizes you arent his aunt and theres a reason youve lived them for all these years. We then mock his existing reddit post which leads him to buck up and eventually repeat the cycle. 800 years from now someone writes an extremely popular novel which is turned into an opera about the madness of the now long extinct human race.

The worst case is whatever you plan on doing

# ? Dec 9, 2017 02:56

La Brea Carpet: Nov 22, 2007; I have no mouth and I must post

Barudak posted:

So whats best is you transfer all rights to them and you get your tubes tied. Later you and them grow up to destroy the mind of your child who walks in on you having a threeway and in a single moment realizes you arent his aunt and theres a reason youve lived them for all these years. We then mock his existing reddit post which leads him to buck up and eventually repeat the cycle. 800 years from now someone writes an extremely popular novel which is turned into an opera about the madness of the now long extinct human race.

The worst case is whatever you plan on doing

This is also how the creator of Wonder Woman made a family.

really, look it up

# ? Dec 9, 2017 03:01

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

The_end posted:

Schizophrenia starts presenting itself around 18 years old.

Yeah it's probably a good explanation. All the comments are "if they'e trying to isolate you from new people you should cut them out" which is good advice if that's what they're doing but the OP hasn't provided one tangible example of that happening. It's all just some nebulous events orchestrated by people trying to keep em down for undefined reasons in undefined ways.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 03:08

Warbadger: Jun 17, 2006

13Pandora13 posted:

She indulged going to movies, watching shows, etc. she expressed disinterest in and he continues to foist them upon her. If someone isn't interested in something and you prattle on about it to them constantly, you're the inconsiderate one, not them.

This is why that whole "my SO is my best friend" thing is so ridiculous and toxic because it reinforces this idea you should have completely matched interests at all costs. He needs to go do that stuff with his geeky friends. She's not obligated to force herself to fake enjoy something she dislikes.

Eh, my SO is definitely my best friend and that has been really good for us. But, well, like any other friend or person in general you have to understand they aren't you and there will be differences in interests.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 03:16

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

My [25M] fianc�e�s [28F] family found out she cheated on me. We see them a lot and they�re being very cold to her. It�s awkward and I�m not sure how to deal with it?

Thanks in advance for any advice.

Background; We�ve been together 8 years. Things have generally been great and I�m also very close to her family. We got engaged this past summer.

Now the bad part; A month ago Bella came home in the morning bawling her eyes out. Turns out she ended up getting drunk and sleeping with someone. Initially I ended it, but after some talking and a lot of tears, I decided I want to work it out. Things are tough now but I think we�re gonna get through it. She has an incredibly stressful job and she came to me with a plan to deal with it better.. she told me she�s desperate to fix it and I believe her.

The actual problem; her sister, who is my best friend found out what happened after seeing messages on Bella�s phone. She told her mother and younger sister. They�re now being really cold to her.. we see them at least 3 times a week. They do things like talk cheerfully to me and say either practically nothing to her or something passive aggressive, also how much of a shame it is the wedding won�t be happening for a while longer and things of that ilk. It�s not viscous by any means, but I can tell how much it�s getting to Bella. She thinks she deserves it but I don�t think it�s serving any purpose.

Should I talk to them? Her mum is like my own so I wouldn�t feel awkward doing so, but I don�t know if it�s my place to comment on this. Should I say anything? Or just let it pass naturally?

TLDR: fianc�e cheated, her family found out and are treating her coldly. Should I say something?

break up with your fiance�, marry the sister, problem solved.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 03:16

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Did you know a lack of calcium in childhood can lead to weak bones in adulthood?

# ? Dec 9, 2017 03:19

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

Am I [32M] being selfish for not wanting to share my bed/room with my inlaws [65]?

quote:

TL;DR: My wife [33F] and I [32m] have been married for over 7 years, so this is not a new relationship deal. Her parents are coming over to watch our 2 kids (3 and 5) so we can go to my work christmas party; we have a hotel room as it's over 30 minutes away and it's a nice get-a-way. The in-laws have always stayed in the guest room, but right now it's FULL of christmas gifts, including mine from my wife.

My wife's plan was to have them sleep in our bed. I am absolutely not okay with sharing my bed/room. I consider it my personal space and just don't want to share it. I don't think I should have to. I told her this, but she doesn't seem to care and said she's not moving all the stuff out of the room (would take like 5 minutes). I can't move the stuff bc I'd "ruin christmas" by seeing my gift.

Furthermore, I overheard my wife talking on the phone to her parents about a week ago about christmas plans. Her brother and his man with their baby will be staying with us for a few days. On the phone I heard her say we'd be giving our room (while we're still staying here too) to her brother, SO and 1.5 mo/old, i think her parents would be in the guest room and we'd be with our kids. Our one daughter has a full, and the other has a trundle bed (two twins). Our house is by no means small, at about 3200 sq. ft. and we have a bonus room with a full size futon (really thick mattress with springs in it) not college style; and an air mattress. I told her that I'm not giving up my bed when I heard her on the phone. It seems like (and is obvious now) she has disregarded my opinion on the matter.

Am I being unreasonable here? I don't want to share my bed/room.

*EDIT: title: lend not share, as I will not be in there at the same time.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 03:21

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

LOVE LOVE SKELETON posted:

three years of begging him to talk about something, anything but chewbacca

The Chewbacca Defense has kept many terrible relationships together.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 03:32

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Inescapable Duck posted:

The Chewbacca Defense has kept many terrible relationships together.

It's not a relationship if only one of you is in love, with Chewbacca.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 03:32

PetraCore: Jul 20, 2017; 👁️🔥👁️👁️👁️BE NOT👄AFRAID👁️👁️👁️🔥👁️

Pick posted:

It's not a relationship if only one of you is in love, with Chewbacca.

Han and Leia found that out the hard way.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 04:44

new phone who dis: May 24, 2007; by VideoGames; Morbid Hound

Haifisch posted:

Am I [32M] being selfish for not wanting to share my bed/room with my inlaws [65]?

I don't care who sleeps in my bed if I'm not there but I'll be God Damned if anyone sleeps in it when I'm there. You better have one hell of a health reason to kick me out of my own bed in my own house.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 05:02

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

La Brea Carpet posted:

I (25f) am not the Manic Pixie Geek Girl my boyfriend (27m) wants. How can I get it through to him? 3 years together.

Get Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind on DVD. Tell him it's a great sci-fi movie you want to see with him. When it gets to the part where Kate Winslet's character tells Jim Carrey's that she's not a manic pixie girl, pause and yell at him "DO YOU GET IT NOW!?!?!?!?", then leave.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 05:05

girl pants: Sep 21, 2006; I feel a great disturbance in my pants

La Brea Carpet posted:

I [26, F] purposely became pregnant to keep the guy [26, M] I was in a regular threesome with. I know I'm horrible, I just want to know how to continue and what's best for the situation

Please for the love of God abort that baby

# ? Dec 9, 2017 05:31

Doc Hawkins: Jun 15, 2010; Dashing? But I'm not even moving!

Absurd Alhazred posted:

Get Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind on DVD. Tell him it's a great sci-fi movie you want to see with him. When it gets to the part where Kate Winslet's character tells Jim Carrey's that she's not a manic pixie girl, pause and yell at him "DO YOU GET IT NOW!?!?!?!?", then leave.

That's kindof the ultimate "don't tell us to break up" movie, though.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 05:50

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

Doc Hawkins posted:

That's kindof the ultimate "don't tell us to break up" movie, though.

That's why she breaks it off before it ends.

Edit for content:

My girlfriend [28 F] opened my [28 M] main Reddit account and snooped through my private messages without my permission

quote:

We've been in a relationship for just over a year. My girlfriend loves to use my laptop, and while I'm out of town, she opened Reddit to browse herself. But it auto logged onto my account. Instead of logging off, she goes through my personal messages, finds stuff from over a year ago (before we were dating or talking), and interrogates me about it.

After making it clear that I was pissed, she still hasn't apologized and says that she's glad she was able to learn more about me. I've since changed my password, but this is the first instance that she's done something like this. I feel kinda violated. Am I right to feel this way?

Tl;dr: girlfriend logged into my account, read messages, am I right to feel violated?

Woah, meta.

Absurd Alhazred fucked around with this message at 05:57 on Dec 9, 2017

# ? Dec 9, 2017 05:52

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Absurd Alhazred posted:

That's why she breaks it off before it ends.

Edit for content:

My girlfriend [28 F] opened my [28 M] main Reddit account and snooped through my private messages without my permission

Woah, meta.

DTMFA

# ? Dec 9, 2017 06:30

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

therobit posted:

DTMFA

If you're dumped in reddit, you're dumped in real life.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 06:35

Chicken Doodle: May 16, 2007

La Brea Carpet posted:

I [26, F] purposely became pregnant to keep the guy [26, M] I was in a regular threesome with. I know I'm horrible, I just want to know how to continue and what's best for the situation

hahahahahaahah she hosed up and made herself a surrogate, I've been laughing for 10 minutes and counting. What a goddam moron.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 07:57

Waterbed Wendy: Jan 29, 2009

i think we can all agree the solution is to have a baby for every single one of these stories. YES EVEN THAT ONE.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 08:39

Beachcomber: May 21, 2007; Another day in paradise.; Slippery Tilde

What about the guy whose girlfriend needs her butt licked until she falls asleep?

# ? Dec 9, 2017 09:30

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

Chicken Doodle posted:

hahahahahaahah she hosed up and made herself a surrogate, I've been laughing for 10 minutes and counting. What a goddam moron.

They're all goddamn morons.

'Huh our threesome partner told me she's got feelings for me and tries to keep sleeping with me one on one...
Oh, she suddenly wants to start threesomes again? I'll still blow a load into her repeatedly. What could possibly go wrong?'
:downs:

I don't know if that's stupider than her hopes he'd dump his girlfriend to be with her because of the baby

These three boners all got exactly what they deserve. Sucks for that kid though. I wonder if there's going to be weird simmering resentment issues forever.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 10:18

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

Back to back posts because this gal has found herself in a lovely situation.

My [24F] boyfriend [26M] doesn't clean himself properly

quote:

My boyfriend and I have been dating almost three years, and we just recently moved in together. In the span of months we�ve been living together, I�ve noticed that he does not clean himself properly, and I�m almost embarrassed to be typing this online.

He doesn�t wipe his rear end enough when he shits. I don�t understand why I haven�t noticed this before, since we spent weekends together before getting an apartment, so living with it has been a little weird and I�m not sure how to approach it.

We have an open bathroom kind of relationship, so I know what he does and when. He�s a once and done kind of man, which I found odd but if you�re clean you�re clean.

He isn�t clean. I find poo poo on the towels we use after we shower, and I�ve washed them a couple times without complaint just because I�m unsure of how to broach the issue gently. The bedroom smelled like it one time, and when he left the room I confirmed it was definitely his side of the bed. I mentioned that his side of the bed smelled horrific and that I couldn�t sleep if it smelled like that, so we washed the sheets that night. I didn�t blame him, and I�m not sure what he thought or if he even knows it�s him.

TL;DR What�s the best way to tell your boyfriend he needs to wipe more without hurting him too bad? I find the issue ridiculous, and just need some advice to get the conversation going. Thanks, Reddit.

Point out the poo poo stains to that shitstain!

It makes me think of that episode of Horrible People where Billy Eichen gets a gig on a kids show and has to perform a song about proper wiping. 'Wipe, wipe, wipe! Til you see the white!'

LadyPictureShow fucked around with this message at 13:41 on Dec 9, 2017

# ? Dec 9, 2017 11:45

girl pants: Sep 21, 2006; I feel a great disturbance in my pants

WHY are so many men not able to wipe their own butts?

# ? Dec 9, 2017 13:53

Theophany: Jul 22, 2014; SUCCHIAMI IL MIO CAZZO DA DIETRO, RANA RAGAZZO

2022 FIA Formula 1 WDC

girl pants posted:

WHY are so many men not able to wipe their own butts?

It takes up valuable raiding time.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 13:57

Danaru: Jun 5, 2012; 何 ??

girl pants posted:

WHY are so many men not able to wipe their own butts?

Only gays touch their butts, I'm so manly and straight that everything I own smells of feces 24/7 :smuggo:

# ? Dec 9, 2017 13:57

dog nougat: Apr 8, 2009

Toxic masculinity/severe homophobia? I don't get how literally cleaning poo poo off of your rear end could be gay in any capacity. Going off what she says, it also sounds like the dude doesn't even wash his rear end when he bathes either. It's just so unfathomably disgusting.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 14:01

girl pants: Sep 21, 2006; I feel a great disturbance in my pants

Men seem to spend 23 hours a day touching their sad little peepees but can't spend 5 minutes wiping the poo poo from their own butts. I don't get it. I mean, it's YOUR butt. Surely touching your own butt is no less or more gay than touching your own dick. Or are they afraid they're going to get turned on by wiping? What the Christ

Anyway, here's a man who can't pee right

Me [28F] with my husband [28M], he keeps peeing on the bathroom floor and denying it!
u/stopthepeepeepls

quote:

Throwaway, because hubby dearest is a redditor.

This is kind of a stupid issue, but it's driving me absolutely insane. I love my husband Sid very much, and this is really the only thing bothering me about our relationship currently.

I've only noticed this since we moved into our new house a few months ago; it may have been going on prior to that, but maybe he used to wipe it up and now he doesn't? I'm not sure. Anyway. Sid frequently uses the bathroom before I get up and get ready for work. Several times a week, there is pee all over the toilet seat and on the floor near the toilet. I know it is pee because I've wiped it up after sitting/stepping in it.

Now, my husband and I are the only people in the house who use the toilet. Our daughter is less than a year old, so it's not her, and we keep the door closed when the bathroom is not in use, so it's not our cats (would smell a lot worse if that was the case anyway). The pee is not on the floor before I go to bed. There is no way it could be from anyone but Sid.

I wouldn't mind quite so much if he would own up to it and start doing something about it, but Sid insists that there is no way he would ever pee on the floor and not clean it up. I have made him follow me into the bathroom so I could point it out, and he started off trying to say it was water from the sink/shower; when I pointed out that it was clearly pee, he blamed the cats and insisted that one of them must have gotten in and done it.

I feel like I'm taking crazy pills or something because he's so adamant that it couldn't have been him, when I'm positive that there is no alternative. This is totally ridiculous and I can't believe I have to ask for outside assistance with this issue, but please. God. Help me. What the gently caress do I do here?

tl;dr: My husband, a grown man, keeps peeing on the floor and acting like he didn't do it. Halp.

MYSTERIOUS GHOST PEE. Of course he's a loving redditor.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 14:29

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Thanks to fantasy authors well versed in dragon riding I learned that men become 100% gay if anyone sticks anything in their butt, so blaming these men for trying to stay with ther girlfriends by never touching their own butts seems really cruel.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 15:25

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 12, 2024 18:46

Olanphonia: Jul 27, 2006; I'm open to suggestions~

Get poo poo husband a bidet. It'll clean him real nicely.

# ? Dec 9, 2017 15:36

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