- Cyberpope v2
- Oct 26, 2002
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by Lowtax
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He probably got the team of hot young women because he's the only person in the office who hasn't been accused of sexual harassment yet.
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Dec 22, 2017 18:25
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 30, 2024 09:57
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- small ghost
- Jan 30, 2013
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My[33M] daughter [11F] just blew up at me and told me she doesn't want to come to visit me anymore
quote:
I (33m) and my wife(25f) have a daughter(4f). My older daughter(11f) lives with her mother in another state. Her mother and I have been at odds for much of her life and are only now beginning to be civil and actually talk together with level heads and co-parent.
My daughter lives in another state with her mother. Her mother was back and forth between states when I met her and she left to go back after we were together. Due to trust issues between her and I, we ended our relationship and she moved back to this other state with her dad (my daughter's grandfather). When she told me she was pregnant, I didn't believe her as she was constantly lying to me the whole time we were together.
Three years go by, I don't give it a second thought until I was served child support papers. She is mine, and I have been in her life ever since. When I first met her, she was two and a half, and she is now eleven. When she first met me, she really didn't want a whole lot to do with me, and the only male role model she had in her life was her uncle. Even in later years, when there was no consoling her, she only ever wanted her uncle, not her mother, or grandmother, or me only her uncle. This was hard for me but I got used to it and tried to parent her as best I could, even though I had no idea what I was doing. Her mom moves around and has not had a stable place to live until now. I have been in the same place for over 6 years now. In the other state, she went to three schools in the two years they lived there and she was in school and they were having so many problems at the schools down there that they moved here to get her into a better school. She moved here at age 7 still in kindergarten and was unable to start the first grade when she came.
For the last three years, she has lived here in my state, and I have had her for three of the four days of the school week. She has had counselling at her school and they have determined that she had anxiety and ADHD. I believe that there may be more issues as she has a hard time picking up on certain social cues but nothing else has been determined or set in stone. While she lived here, she would stay with me and my now wife and daughter and she had her own room in our 2 bedroom apartment. The little one always stayed in our room with us. At her mother's house she never really had a room so I wanted to make sure she had her own safe space here at my house so she had her own space rather than just a pile of clothes and a couch to sleep on. My work schedule changed and one of the nights I was supposed to be home, she was left here with my wife and daughter.
When she was left alone with my wife and daughter, everything changed about her. She never wanted to listen or do anything she was told. My wife just has a higher standard of living rather than what my daughter is used to with her mother, including things like brushing teeth, taking regular showers and not talking back. These were not as much of a problem when I was home, but they became more and more of a problem when I was not. My wife eventually had tried everything she could do and had a bit of a mental break. I decided that my daughter would only come to my house when I was there so that my wife was never left alone with her. She and I have separately had some counselling and therapy and I understand that I am not nearly as good a parent as she is. I was parented differently than she was and I was not nearly as good of a parent to my older daughter as I have been to my youngest.
My daughter is definitely jealous of my youngest daughter because she sees that connection that we have and have had since the youngest was born. I never had that with her and nothing can ever change that. I regret not being able to be there for her when she was that age, but unfortunately, I wasn't able to be there until I was. I would have given anything to be there for her at that early age. Now she resents my youngest and is acting out. Shortly before she moved to the other state (around August of last year), she was at my house staying with my wife and daughter and during a particularly bad fit she was having, she told them both that she couldn't wait to move away so that she didn't have to see them ever again. She would have never said anything like that when I was here.
Fast forward to today, she has lived in the other state for nearly four months and I have only gotten to see her on her school breaks. It is not a lot of time, but I try to get her up here as often as I can. When I try to call down there to talk to her, I get the runaround and have to call around to a couple places to possibly get to talk to her. When I do, it seems like she is on speaker with her grandfather listening into our conversations, and she usually doesn't say a lot to me, I have to lead the conversation and get a lot of yes' and no's. I was planning on activating a cell phone to give to her for this holiday so that I could talk to her more often.
My wife and I within the last few months have redecorated the second bedroom for our youngest daughter and have redone the room for her so that she can have her own room in our house. My oldest was at first ok with the idea but is now starting to have a big problem with it. I informed her that sharing was only right, seeing as how she got the room for the first four years of her sister's life and now that she isn't living here full time, it's only right that her sister can have the room.
Today she didn't get her way and wasn't able to spend the night at her uncle's house because I wanted to see her and have her with me, and she threw a fit saying everything she said to my wife those months ago, only about myself and everyone in my family. She said she didn't want to come here at all anymore and that she just wanted to stay away from us and not even participate in our holidays at all. She said she wanted me out of her life forever. I have personally been fighting depression for these months and because of all of this my wife is threatening to leave because I can't get this situation among others under my control. Things have been getting better these last couple months, but this is bringing it all back up again. I don't want my youngest or my wife or myself to be talked to like this, and I just don't know what to do.
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Dec 22, 2017 19:14
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- christmas boots
- Oct 15, 2012
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To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
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Biscuit Hider
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Baby Jesus has ruined my future.. (Let me explain)
quote:
So when I was 19 back in 2006, a friend and I thought it'd be a great idea to steal baby Jesus' out of people's nativity scenes that they used to decorate their lawns for Christmas. The prank was that we would return them on Easter. We wrote down each address and took pictures with each baby Jesus so that we knew which baby Jesus went where. Really elaborate. Very funny, insurmountably stupid.
It gets much worse. The following February I get a knock on my door. Apparently my friend who took the pictures thought it would be a fun idea to post the pictures on the interwebs. Myspace, to be precise. Well, another friend saw these images, and that friend's mom saw him laughing at said images and promptly called the police. The very same police that greeted me at my front door with the images in hand. It did not take long for me to confirm with the officer that the person in each of the pictures was me. I am told to meet him downtown in a week's time where my rights will be read to me, and I would then confess for the record that my friend and I stole 10 baby Jesus' from the yards of 10 different homes. Which, at that time in the state of Indiana, counts at 10 separate counts of class D felony theft. I was told by the nice officer that I would assist him in returning each baby Jesus that was stolen, and anywhere between 3-6 months from that time - I would indeed be (actually) arrested, and taken to jail.
Fast forward a few months and sure enough, at 3am the nice police officers banged on my door, arrested me, and took me to jail. I spent an agonizing night inside a cold cell with several others who had, in a domestic dispute, stabbed their significant other, another who masturbated in public, also a guy who assaulted a police officer, and finally someone drove under the influence of cocaine. At my court date the next morning, I stood before a judge and plead guilty to my crimes. I was out on bond about 4 hours after.
A month later at my sentencing, I was given 18 months of probation and 120 hours of community service. I completed all of my hours in 3 months and was released early from probation.
My lawyer, along with my probation officer, and 10 polite letters I had written to each victim of Jesus theft, got my 10 charges of class D felony theft down to 1 charge of misdemeanor theft.
So here I am, nearing my 21st birthday, and I know that I have a dreadful future of career searching ahead of me due to this whole nasty ordeal.
Fast forward to December of 2017. A span of time in which I've worked three jobs where I have handled large amounts of money and expensive items, 4 jobs where I worked directly with children, two jobs working with Christian organizations, and most recently, 4 months at a job where I work for a temp agency where my assignment is at a corporate call center for a large bank. A bank that loves me, Thinks I'm one of their best agents, and can't wait to hire me full time because well, I'm pretty goddamn excellent at what I do.
Exceptional enough that they rushed me into applying for a permanent position so that they could begin my career path to eventually work in management.
The application process was a breeze. My references were glowing, my resume spotless. But every time I get to the part where it asks me if I've been convicted of any crimes, felonies or misdemeanors, my butthole always tightens a bit. I recall my lawyer telling me that after 7 years, it won't show up on any consumer reports. It's been 11 since my conviction. So.. What do I say? Do I proceed honestly, and write my life story in the "explain" section, or do I say no and hope nothing comes up on my background check? I read through the terms and agreements of the background check which tells me anything negative beyond 7 years would not appear. Great. I'm in the clear. So, I decided to say no.
Then, in my worried state, I decide to look into it a bit further and it turns out, in the lovely state of Indiana, the FCRA can go back as far as the eye can see.
So after a lot of nail biting, and anxiously waiting to know if I'll be promoted, I receive notification from my temp agency today that my assignment with the bank has been terminated effective immediately.
TL;DR I stole 10 baby Jesus' in 2006, I was charged with 10 counts of class D felony theft. After 18 months probation and 120 hours of community service, the charges were reduced to 1 count misdemeanor theft. I have worked several reputable jobs within and after the 7 year span that crimes show up on consumer reports. In the application process after the 7 years, I have always answered "No" when it asks me if I've been charged or convicted of any crimes. It's never came back to bite me. Until today, when it ruined a great opportunity with a large bank.
My question - what are the most effective steps I can take to get this expunged? Until then, how should I answer when the application asks me the crimes question again? And what is the best way to explain, without going into too much detail, that I'm an excellent worker, who shouldn't have one stupid mistake decide my entire future.
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Dec 22, 2017 19:30
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- Fantastic Flyer
- Aug 9, 2017
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Returning the Jesuses (Jesii?) on Easter would have been pretty funny, tbh.
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Dec 22, 2017 20:03
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- Meme Emulator
- Oct 4, 2000
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Jesus is helping this man save his immortal soul by keeping him from advancing in a usurous organization
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Dec 22, 2017 20:05
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- Khorne
- May 1, 2002
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Sometimes you see what the completed puzzle looks like and it horrifies you, so you prefer to just pretend you can't finish it rather than finish it and actually deal with what's in front of you.
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Dec 22, 2017 20:36
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- small ghost
- Jan 30, 2013
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The daughter feels unwanted, like she doesn't belong anywhere because she has no space at either house to live in. In her mother's house she sleeps on the couch. In her father's house 'her' room has been turned over to her younger sister. She probably feels like a burden while her younger sister is lavished upon. Also her home life is a loving mess and she needs homelife stability pronto.
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Dec 22, 2017 20:57
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- flick my Mr. Bean
- Nov 18, 2014
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Dear Reddit, my daughter, for understandable reasons, feels unloved and unwanted. How do I stop her from being such a bitch?
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Dec 22, 2017 21:07
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- Anne Whateley
- Feb 11, 2007
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 i like nice words
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I like the miffed/injured tone of "When she first met me, she really didn't want a whole lot to do with me." She was two years oldddddd
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Dec 22, 2017 21:18
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- Ham Sandwiches
- Jul 7, 2000
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I [25M] have planned a trip with my dad [55M] and my GF [22F] of a year wants to tag along. Am I being unreasonable?
quote:Hi everyone,
So, my dad and I are both busy people. When our schedules allow it, we like to go on a week-long golfing trip together, and have done so since I was a teen.
Recently, my dad mentioned that he was going to be free for a week in a few months, and I expressed interest in taking a trip with him. When I mentioned it to my girlfriend, she wanted me to ask my dad if it was ok with him if she came.
I know my dad would say yes (even if he would prefer spending the trip with me) out of politeness, but the fact is I can’t imagine the dynamic of the trip being the same if I brought her along, since we both see the trip as a father/son bonding experience. We have taken trips like those at different stages of our lives, and have always had some of the most meaningful discussions we’ve ever had there.
So my question to you is : Am I being unreasonable for wanting this to be just the two of us? Also, how do I approach the subject to my girlfriend while minimizing the damage? I don’t think she would take it very well.
tl;dr: My dad and I have a trip lined up soon, and my GF of a year really wants to come. I am uneasy about it. Am I wrong? How do I express that feeling to her?
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Dec 22, 2017 21:20
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- Ham Sandwiches
- Jul 7, 2000
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Lol "I had a kid with someone I despise and I'm worried my kid may turn out like them" yeah uhh
Me [26F] embarrassed to bring partner [27M] to Christmas holidays because of political views, work, and social issues. Terrified of my son ending up like him HELP
quote:Edit:SO and I have 1 son together, have lived together 1 year, been together 3 years
Last night my SO and I brought our son over to his parents for his brothers birthday. His family is not as close as mine and I get that families are different .... but I found his behaviour so rude. He’s constantly on his phone trying to avoid his family, then is always yelling “HUH” “WHAT” when his parents try to talk to him. I asked him to please just put his phone away... it was his brothers birthday after all. He always gets mad and just starts acting bratty saying things like “WHAT leave me alone” at full volume when I would try to whisper things to him about his behaviour.
When his brother was opening presents he couldn’t even be bothered to turn around from the armchair to watch. This behaviour would never fly in my family !
When we were all at the dinner table we have to skirt certain topics ... his political opinions saturate every conversation..... for example we were watching HGTV with his grandparents and he goes on about how there’s enough empty houses in America that could support the homeless but capitalism ruins it blah blah blah
His father who has done so much for us this past year to support us with our new baby works for a big corporation in sales. My SO constantly tells him that it’s a stupid company ... and my FIL isn’t even complaining about his job or anything. And my SO doesn’t have a job right now. I try to remind him you shouldn’t criticize the way other people make a living when you can’t even make one ....
He never helps clean up, his brother automatically does (so it’s not a family thing where the mother does everything) and when I ask him to just look around and help at dinner or clean up he just says “I’m a guest !” (At his parents house 🙄), or “I don’t know what to do”
Sooooooo here is my issue: my family is extremely close, very polite. None of this behaviour would fly. We were already not invited to a family dinner and I’m wondering if it is because my SO is so brash and rude. In my mother’s words “we just wanted something where our extended family could meet your sisters boyfriend” which is bull because we never do things like that.
I don’t know what to do, I hate bringing him to events. If he acts like this at my family Christmas I will be so embarrassed. It’s extremely important to me that my son learns to respect adults and be helpful. I’m concerned that if my partner and I don’t BOTH have these qualities or agree on how to behave I’ll end up with two assholes.
In the car ride home I tried to bring up the behaviour that I don’t find appropriate and he just laughed. Is there a better way to bring up these issues ?
TL;DR Partner is embarrassingly rude at family events, constantly brings up politics, and is always on his phone. Worried to bring him to my house for Christmas.
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Dec 22, 2017 21:23
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- ArbitraryC
- Jan 28, 2009
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Pick a number, any number
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Pillbug
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I [25M] have planned a trip with my dad [55M] and my GF [22F] of a year wants to tag along. Am I being unreasonable?
has he tried just saying exactly that to her? It's a father son trip they do with regularity and they like to have it be just the two of them for bonding.
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Dec 22, 2017 21:24
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- Ham Sandwiches
- Jul 7, 2000
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Spot the 
My [31m] wife's friends [early 20's F] have convinced her [24f] that I'm a ticking time bomb
quote:About four years ago I met my now wife. We share many common interests and we are highly attracted to each other as people. About six months after we started dating, we married.
By my father's demands, I had her sign a prenuptial agreement. At the time she was happy and enthusiastic to do so in order to show she was never after my money. This will be relevant later.
Two years ago we started getting into arguments, primarily starting over her constant need to be in control. She has a very repetitive kind of behavior, where she engages in the following steps to get her way:
(1) Makes a seemingly innocent comment about something she noticed.
(2) Repeats the comment if she does not receive the desired response.
(3) Repeats the comment again.
(4) Makes the same comment again, but more directly or with an imperative statement attached.
(5) Explains that she really wishes I would do something about it and acts coldly to me for the rest of the day.
Example. In this situation, I'm working and she approaches me from behind:
Her: There are cans on your desk.
Me: There sure are.
Her: Yeah. 1-2-3-4... 4 cans. That's a lot.
Me: Well, yeah, it's my desk, so don't worry about it.
Her: I don't like it when there are cans on your desk.
Me: I understand that. I'm busy working and am not going to clean them up right now.
Her: I don't know why you're so angry with me. I just want you to clean up your desk. (storms off)
Her typical response to me not giving her the desired response is to claim that I'm angry and snapping at her.
This has had an effect on her relationships with her friends. When she meets them, she'll complain about me often, as she's never satisfied with anything and there's always something new to complain about. Her friends will nod and agree.
Lately it has escalated. I've heard, through a friend of one of her friends, that they're trying to persuade her to leave me because they believe I'm going to begin physically abusing her. They said I made her sign the prenup because I didn't trust or respect her. They said my impatience was going to morph into something far more insidious eventually and it is only a matter of time. My wife has grown more and more distant as a result, and I'm afraid that she's starting to actually become delusional. She seems very nervous when I'm around and typically goes into another room when she thinks it's natural.
tl;dr: My wife's friends are filling her head with ideas that I'm turning violent. I've never hit her. I don't know what to do because it feels like the harder I try to convince her otherwise, the worse I'll look.
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Dec 22, 2017 21:26
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- Farmer Crack-Ass
- Jan 2, 2001
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this is me posting irl
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Four cans is nothing, call back when it's an empty case and a loaded shotgun.
edit: okay fine you probably want to call before it gets to that point
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Dec 22, 2017 21:38
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- flick my Mr. Bean
- Nov 18, 2014
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Also if four cans bothered her that much, why didn't she just throw them away? I'm not saying it's her job to clean up after him but if my wife was working at her desk and something on it annoyed me, I'd just ask if I could take care of it and fix it.
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Dec 22, 2017 21:41
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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Lol "I had a kid with someone I despise and I'm worried my kid may turn out like them" yeah uhh
Me [26F] embarrassed to bring partner [27M] to Christmas holidays because of political views, work, and social issues. Terrified of my son ending up like him HELP
kill your boyfriend and feed his body to the homeless
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Dec 22, 2017 21:42
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- Ham Sandwiches
- Jul 7, 2000
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Also if four cans bothered her that much, why didn't she just throw them away? I'm not saying it's her job to clean up after him but if my wife was working at her desk and something on it annoyed me, I'd just ask if I could take care of it and fix it.
Guessing because the "there are 4 cans!!" incident has happened before and she wants him to figure out that it's unacceptable and not do it anymore on his own without being reminded
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Dec 22, 2017 21:44
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- Bunni-kat
- May 25, 2010
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Service Desk B-b-bunny...
How can-ca-caaaaan I
help-p-p-p you?
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Guessing because the "there are 4 cans!!" incident has happened before and she wants him to figure out that it's unacceptable and not do it anymore on his own without being reminded
Probably, but guy also said that he was working, so if it's working from home, or hell, even on a personal project, I can see not wanting to interrupt what you're doing just to dispose of some stuff immediately. I think important information is just how long did it take those cans to accumulate. One day? Fine. Four days? Less fine.
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Dec 22, 2017 21:46
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- flick my Mr. Bean
- Nov 18, 2014
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My [35F] husband [34M] of four years thinks he can fix things around the house. He can’t.
quote:submitted 3 hours ago by Notmrfixit
My husband and I have been married four years and bought a house in May. It’s a flip and didn’t need much work, which was great.
There’s been a few kinks though, especially with the heat, and without getting into a bunch of boring furnace stories, some work needs to be done on our insulation upstairs, and the baseboard heaters downstairs.
The problem: my husband thinks he’s handy enough to fix these things on his own. He can’t. He’s actually made it worse, and just made it more inevitable that we’ll have to pay for repairs.
He’s a very smart guy but this isn’t his thing. He’ll watch YouTube videos and talk to his dad, and feel like he knows what he’s doing. Meanwhile the rest of the family suffers with a house that so either too hot or too cold while he refuses to call a professional for help.
This is not a finance thing - we have the money to pay for professional repairs. I think it’s a pride thing - his father and grandfather both like to fix things around their houses, so I think he feels like he should too. I’m out of ideas as for how to talk to him and convince him that we need an actual HVAC person to come fix things. I’m angry (and either sweating or shivering) and he’s defensive. He keeps saying “I’ll just fix it” but.....he can’t. Our conversations about this are going nowhere fast since he’s insistent he can do things he demonstrably cannot do.
I don’t want to just call someone behind his back but what else can i do when he’s grossly overestimating his abilities?
TLDR: how do I convince my husband to call a repairman without destroying his pride?
lol this was me a couple times before I learned my lesson. My stepdad taught me how to do a ton of stuff when I was a teenager so I would be like "look, honey, if I can build a house, I can fix a...ah...poo poo. I hosed up."
e: in my case, it was never something as insane as "don't worry, I can fix an A/C unit with no training"
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Dec 22, 2017 21:47
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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4 cans
1
2
3
4
... 4
that s a lot of cans
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Dec 22, 2017 21:50
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- Ham Sandwiches
- Jul 7, 2000
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4 cans
1
2
3
4
... 4
that s a lot of cans
Yeah the part where she counted them out really cracked me up
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Dec 22, 2017 21:52
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- DragQueenofAngmar
- Dec 29, 2009
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You shall not pass!
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has he tried just saying exactly that to her? It's a father son trip they do with regularity and they like to have it be just the two of them for bonding.
if she was gonna respond normally she would not have in the first place asked "oh can I go too?" when the OP was describing a trip he was gonna take with just his dad
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Dec 22, 2017 21:53
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- Anne Whateley
- Feb 11, 2007
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i like nice words
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My [35F] husband [34M] of four years thinks he can fix things around the house. He can’t.
lol this was me a couple times before I learned my lesson. My stepdad taught me how to do a ton of stuff when I was a teenager so I would be like "look, honey, if I can build a house, I can fix a...ah...poo poo. I hosed up."
e: in my case, it was never something as insane as "don't worry, I can fix an A/C unit with no training"
He didn't improve, I think by the time I was 10 my mom just put her foot down, because it was so much cheaper to pay a repair guy before Dad double-hosed it up.
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Dec 22, 2017 21:53
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- flick my Mr. Bean
- Nov 18, 2014
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He doesn't have a felony, the only thing ruining his future is being a moron.
That's what confused me. If I'm charged with murder but they find me innocent, I don't have to write down "yep I was charged with murder but they couldn't prove it so I'm free" on applications.
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Dec 22, 2017 22:02
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- DragQueenofAngmar
- Dec 29, 2009
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You shall not pass!
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he appears to be in the US and is not the employer, so in practical terms he is hosed and his potential employers will do whatever the gently caress they want regardless of the law and get away with it 99.8% of the time
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Dec 22, 2017 22:13
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- Ham Sandwiches
- Jul 7, 2000
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It doesn't matter whether you tick 'yes' on the form or whether the public records search returns any results, either way a bank probably won't hire you with any criminal record whatsoever.
It's not as if answering Yes helps, other than saving them the cost of doing the background check / search
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Dec 22, 2017 22:14
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- flick my Mr. Bean
- Nov 18, 2014
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They're asking if he was convicted of any crimes and he said no, even though he has been convicted of a crime.
Maybe they're pissy about him lying rather than anything else but it might depend on the definition of crime vs misdemeanor, or the wording of the question. Could be that they do a background check on everyone and anyone with anything more than a speeding ticket is blacklisted without question.
Is it illegal to ask about misdemeanours or arrests in the USA, as opposed to convictions?
Ah, they asked about crimes in general. Okay. As far as I can remember, every application I've seen only asks about felony convictions. At my current employer, it asks if you've been convicted of a felony in the last five years.
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Dec 22, 2017 22:15
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- Ham Sandwiches
- Jul 7, 2000
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He has a misdemeanor. Speeding is a misdemeanor. People with teen misdemeanors have become the heads of major corporations.
In the US, the heavy-duty legal discrimination comes out for people with felony convictions. The standard employment and housing applications ask if you've ever been convicted of a felony.
It's a bank, and banks tend to be extra leery of people with records, because they don't want any theft or fraud of the money that they keep around.
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Dec 22, 2017 22:20
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 30, 2024 09:57
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Dec 22, 2017 18:25
Cat Army 
"women's work"