|
tactlessbastard posted:Your financially clever kinkster would take his chastity belt problem to a mechanic or locksmith Men In Tights wasn't actually a good or funny movie when I tried re-watching it as an adult
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:42
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 12, 2024 15:32 |
|
|
My (27m) best friend and best man (28m) has vowed he's going to say "one ring to rule them all!" when presenting the rings at the alter. My fiancé (26f) has forbidden it. He's going to do it anyways. What do I do? I know this is a stupid question. I'm sorry for wasting everyone's time on it. But I feel like I'm caught between my best friend of 25 years and the woman I love more than anything. Basically it goes like this, my best friend has said that when the minister asks for my ring he's going to hold it over his head and loudly proclaim "ONE RING TO RULE THEM ALL!" thinking he's going to get a big laugh. I've told him not to and since we sort of joke with each other every single minute of the day, I know there's nothing I can do to make him not do it and the more I moan about it, the more he's going to seal his position. Well he got drunk last weekend while we were out and told my fiancé about his plan. She was pretty buzzed and it started out with "Brian please don't that would embarrass the crap out of me." He basically said I know. She started to get more and more scared (and drank more) and basically screamed at him and shook him by his collar and said "Brian goddamnit if you do this I will loving kill you." Which is exactly the reaction Brian was going for. Well the problem didn't end when everyone sobered up. She's sending him texts with all the reasons he can't embarrass her at her own wedding. He's screencapping the texts and editing them with things like "does she think I care? I want to embarrass her!" and then sends them to me. I honestly don't know what to do. Brian is going to do this no matter what. If I expel him from the Bridal party he's going to show up in the back of the church and scream it out. But at the same time, I want my fiancé to have her dream wedding and I know LOTR references were never part of the fantasy. But at the same time, I have zero doubts that Brian's joke will bomb horribly and he'll be standing there looking like a fool so maybe the best lesson is just to let him go ahead. But my fiancé may literally get so mad she may run out. What the hell do I do here? tl;dr: My best friend wants to yell out "one ring to rule them all!" when he hands my ring to the minister at my wedding. My fiancé has forbidden it but he's going to do it anyways. What do I do?
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:42
|
|
|
loquacius posted:If you show up to the hospital and say "I need help safely removing this medieval torture device which my girlfriend put on me and refuses to take off" they'll probably ask if you want to call the cops for domestic abuse and I can't really argue with them on this one Oh, no arguments here at all, it’s a goddamn silly thing to do to yourself. I just would hope that if I was in serious distress regardless if it’s something I asked to do my significant other would recognize the difference between me in unfun unsexy pain and me playing along with the kink.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:43
|
|
|
CheesyDog posted:Does this count as sexual assault or not? GF refused to let me out of chastity I want to sympathize with you but you're also a big dumbfuck for engaging in this kind of kink.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:44
|
|
|
Stand next to a bike rack and claim to be a bike, some meth addicts with bolt cutters would snip you free in a second. They might try to take your apart behind some bushes and sell your pieces though, so that's always a risk.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:44
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:My (27m) best friend and best man (28m) has vowed he's going to say "one ring to rule them all!" when presenting the rings at the alter. My fiancé (26f) has forbidden it. He's going to do it anyways. What do I do? You either beat the poo poo out of him so he understands the situation or you tell him he isn't the best man anymore and kick his rear end out of the wedding.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:47
|
|
|
Also they're in college, so like, maybe try normal sex for five minutes first
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:47
|
|
i like nice words
|
My guy friend [23M] is offering to pay me [21F] money if I set him up with my single friends. How should I handle this?Dating (self.relationships)quote:He and I met recently and don’t know each other well. He said that he’s single and he wants to date someone. he never had a gf before. Caganer fucked around with this message at 19:04 on Feb 15, 2018 |
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:48
|
|
|
Anne Whateley posted:Also they're in college, so like, maybe try normal sex for 90 to 120 seconds first
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:49
|
|
|
Admiral Ray posted:You either beat the poo poo out of him so he understands the situation or you tell him he isn't the best man anymore and kick his rear end out of the wedding. Better than Berth Ell Pup.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:50
|
|
|
areyoucontagious posted:Like yeah, that’s a silly thing and maybe he was the one who initially wanted to do it but later regretted it, but gently caress that piece of poo poo for toying with him when was clearly in distress. If he went to the hospital clearly he wasn’t messing around. It sounds like it was her fetish and he just went along with it. If it isn't a crime it should be.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:51
|
|
|
Admiral Ray posted:I want to sympathize with you but you're also a big dumbfuck for engaging in this kind of kink. My (18M) GF (29F) refused to let me out of my chastity cage when I wanted to stop.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:52
|
|
|
Peaceful Anarchy posted:Does this version of the title make you a bit more sympathetic? wait is she actually 29 because yikes that detail sure doesn't mix well with the rest of the story
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:54
|
|
|
loquacius posted:If you show up to the hospital and say "I need help safely removing this medieval torture device which my girlfriend put on me and refuses to take off" they'll probably ask if you want to call the cops for domestic abuse and I can't really argue with them on this one The really weird thing is I think chastity belts and cages aren't actually medieval torture devices... like there isn't any credible historical evidence that chastity cages were actually used as a way to ensure faithfulness or virginity, it was just a later invention because people found the idea interesting. It's p much literally always been a kink thing.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:56
|
|
|
Peaceful Anarchy posted:Does this version of the title make you a bit more sympathetic? Yeah, actually. Still a stupid kink to get involved in.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 18:56
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:My (27m) best friend and best man (28m) has vowed he's going to say "one ring to rule them all!" when presenting the rings at the alter. My fiancé (26f) has forbidden it. He's going to do it anyways. What do I do? Take him to a steel foundry to let him live his fantasy
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:00
|
|
|
I think it would be fine if you also had a key, so it was completely voluntary at all times. And so you could, like, piss.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:00
|
|
|
Barudak posted:Take him to a steel foundry to let him live his fantasy Yep. Literally just kick him in to a vat of molten steel. Guy sounds pretty irredeemable.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:04
|
|
|
loquacius posted:wait is she actually 29 because yikes that detail sure doesn't mix well with the rest of the story Holy poo poo I didn't even notice that. That's hosed up.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:04
|
|
|
If that read:quote:Does this count as sexual assault or not? BF refused to let me out of chastity this thread would be  and  all over the place. The guy indulged this lady's kink and she totally abdicated all the responsibilities that come along with it. gently caress her.That being said, go down to the home improvement place and get some bolt cutters dude. Cheaper and less embarrassing.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:05
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:My (27m) best friend and best man (28m) has vowed he's going to say "one ring to rule them all!" when presenting the rings at the alter. My fiancé (26f) has forbidden it. He's going to do it anyways. What do I do? I'm gonna laugh if his plan the whole time was to worry the poo poo out of them and he never planned on shouting it in the first place. The ring gets delivered, they both glance at him, and he just wipes a fake tear from his eye.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:07
|
|
|
Bad Best Man sounds like he just doesn't have good boundaries between Drunken Goof Time and Actual Serious Wedding Requests I think it should be fine if the guy talks to him with a sufficiently serious face when no alcohol is involved and making it clear that you're serious, you really need to take off that chastity belt right now please in this metaphor the chastity belt represents unfunny nerd references at inappropriate times
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:07
|
|
|
Best man sounds absolutely insufferable and needs to be removed from his social circle now that he isn't a zany oh so random 15 year old.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:08
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:My (27m) best friend and best man (28m) has vowed he's going to say "one ring to rule them all!" when presenting the rings at the alter. My fiancé (26f) has forbidden it. He's going to do it anyways. What do I do? Hey yo, your best friend is a piece of poo poo and you’re also lovely for not being able to stand up to him. It’s not even a neurotic bridezilla kind of request, it’s a ‘don’t gently caress up something important to us for your own lulz’. And this guy just goes ‘welp nothing I can do!’. The heck.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:09
|
|
|
NeuralSpark posted:If that read:
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:09
|
|
|
NeuralSpark posted:If that read: Oh I absolutely think he needs to finish ghosting this girl. I'm just saying that he probably shouldn't give admin privileges over his dick to someone who doesn't even deserve read-only access. The fetish is a Bad Idea.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:10
|
|
|
Caganer posted:My guy friend [23M] is offering to pay me [21F] money if I set him up with my single friends. How should I handle this?Dating (self.relationships) This lady was just handed an opportunity to make under the table cash and gain valuable career experience as a professional matchmaker and she’s complaining about it. Millennials. 
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:11
|
|
|
PetraCore posted:Has anyone been defending her in here? The immediate response was to make fun of him and a couple said he shouldn't have indulged in her kink. It took a page for people to say she was a piece of poo poo.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:11
|
|
|
Reading the comments on that chastity belt thing and:quote:[–]NJPWISSHIT2010 That lady is a real piece of poo poo monster that should 
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:13
|
|
|
Chaosfirev posted:The immediate response was to make fun of him and a couple said he shouldn't have indulged in her kink. I was one of the fun-makers and even I was saying fairly quickly that he'd be justified in calling the cops on her Admiral Ray posted:Reading the comments on that chastity belt thing and: Ok yeah the fact that a safeword was established, invoked, and ignored kind of makes it less funny
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:13
|
|
|
quote:For instance, the other day he held up a hand and said "this would just bore you" while talking to our mutual friend about bitcoin, despite the fact that I work in finance and happen to be extremely interested in discussing it on a deep level. lmao
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:14
|
|
|
Admiral Ray posted:Reading the comments on that chastity belt thing and: Counterpoint, according to the his display name he doesn't like New Japan Pro Wrestling and he deserves everything he gets.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:15
|
|
|
All three were correct opinions
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:16
|
|
|
loquacius posted:I was one of the fun-makers and even I was saying fairly quickly that he'd be justified in calling the cops on her Huh. That was the part that finally got me to laugh.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:16
|
|
|
Chastity is a fun kink, but yeah keep a pair of bolt cutters around for when your partner isn't there. Especially with the cheap one because they always break. The lady sounds crazy and I'm glad he dumped her.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:16
|
|
|
Lone Goat posted:Counterpoint, according to the his display name he doesn't like New Japan Pro Wrestling and he deserves everything he gets. How was it in 2010 though
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:17
|
|
|
Ziv Zulander posted:Chastity is a fun kink, but yeah keep a pair of bolt cutters around for when your partner isn't there. Especially with the cheap one because they always break. The lady sounds crazy and I'm glad he dumped her. Or a spare key for emergencies yeah. What if he had to go to the hospital for an unrelated injury and they gotta do an image and now there's some metal poo poo locked onto your junk? Porn is not real life ladies ty! loquacius posted:The fetish is a Bad Idea. nah It's not all that dire you can just pull out of most of those things anyway. The issue is just there involve trust things where other people have power over you and they shouldn't abuse it whether sex stuff or not. Moridin920 fucked around with this message at 19:20 on Feb 15, 2018 |
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:17
|
|
|
Admiral Ray posted:Reading the comments on that chastity belt thing and: Yep that’s definitely a loving piece of subhuman poo poo right there. Also nerd best man needs to be culled from the wedding party. I’m thinking it’s a coin flip after that between him realizing he needs to turn his life around and establish boundaries between joking and not joking, and him doubling down on being a persecuted nerd and just going whole MRA hog wild.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:18
|
|
|
Caganer posted:My guy friend [23M] is offering to pay me [21F] money if I set him up with my single friends. How should I handle this?Dating (self.relationships) an incel with money still a dumb gently caress incel
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:20
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 12, 2024 15:32 |
|
|
Don't be a madame imo
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2018 19:22
|
|