/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

«‹›6020 »

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

Galaxy Brain posted:

Buried lede here, he didn't even wrap the gift.

i missed that part.

yeahhhh. i agree he's prob purposefully doing a half assed job

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:24

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 2, 2024 20:22

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

Haifisch posted:

How can I (31M) be a better gift-giver? My wife (29F) is upset with me yet again

Embrace being a sitcom dad whose schtick is terrible gifts, OP.

Doesn't sound like he's getting much in the way of words of affirmation to me.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:26

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

ArbitraryC posted:

Doesn't sound like he's getting much in the way of words of affirmation to me.

affirmation is for closers

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:27

Anne Whateley: Feb 11, 2007; i like nice words

maskenfreiheit posted:

i'm not a troll look at my post history, sorry that being a strong advocate for sexual freedom rustles your jimmies

lmao

quote:

if you're otherwise compatible and the dealbreaker was loving other people, you're slutshaming. along similar lines if you found out your not-yet-bf was part black, or had a jewish mother and claimed that made you "incompatible" it'd also be biased and wrong. your other examples are things rooted in logic (i want to be in the same city, i don't want to be a parent) whereas denying someone for their sexual history or race is just bias

We're not talking about not dating someone because they hosed other people in the past. That would be slutshaming, sure. We're talking about not dating someone because they're currently hooking up with other people while trying to get with you.

Polyamorous people can do whatever they want, hooray. People who want monogamy just shouldn't date people who don't.

Also fwiw discriminating against parents is illegal under the Fair Housing Act, parents are literally a protected class, and children are just evidence of sexhaving, so imo you should look into your heart there

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:28

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

Caganer posted:

I love it when redditors end their posts with "please advise" like they're Bill Lumbergh reaching out to IT on how to "do google"

When is a relationship exclusive? I feel like I hosed up (self.dating)

Hello sir,
\
\
Please advise client that while we cannot sanction illicit or illegal activities from questionable vendors client should remember that casual dating exists and to simply do the needful.

HR

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:32

Coohoolin: Aug 5, 2012; Oor Coohoolie.

My girlfriend is away on holiday just now and while we both decided not to bother with Valentine's day because it's nonsense, she went online and got me a customised little keychain with a picture of my favourite mandolinist looking very silly with 90s frosted tips and pulling a ridiculous face on stage. There was no expectation of something in return, she surprised me with it, and I laughed for a full half hour because of how funny and perfect a gift it was. I'm a mandolinist and pull funny faces when I'm playing sometimes and it took absolutely no effort to put together a cute little gift that I absolutely love and probably cost more to deliver than to make.

This poo poo ain't hard.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:32

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

Haifisch posted:

How can I (31M) be a better gift-giver? My wife (29F) is upset with me yet again

Embrace being a sitcom dad whose schtick is terrible gifts, OP.

Why is it any OP that discusses �Love language� is always the dumbest motherfucker on the planet? How do you not get her anything for her birthday or anniversary aside from an exercise ball because it �might help her go into labor�.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:33

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

13Pandora13 posted:

I know this is from...pages back but it revived in me a 20 year long rage.

In 4th grade I had a 106 in Science class. I was a really bookish kid in elementary school, I read at recess, etc. - a complete incorrigible nerd. Did extra credit assignments I didn't need for fun to keep my grade over 100.

This little shithead in my class who was failing, or near to, copied my test answers word for word on a chapter test and we both got 0s because "the teacher had no way of knowing who cheated" and that little bitch (gently caress you, Samantha) wouldn't confess while I was crying and begging to not give me a 0. How could you not know which of us cheated, using even a sliver of critical thought? They made me get the test signed by my parents because I "may have cheated" and my grade dropped to a 98.

The next greatest "gently caress you" I got from a teacher was my honors 8th grade history teacher (who I corrected in class because I was an aspie little poo poo that didn't know that was super bad) who refused to write me a recommendation for AP World Geography going into high school, which was required for the class (only for this AP class as the only "freshman" AP offered). Didn't matter that I never dropped below a 95 in his class, he "didn't think I had the emotional maturity for AP" (I graduated with enough AP credits to be a mid-sophomore in college so shows what he loving knew).

In short gently caress bitchy teachers who hold back kids who do well and genuinely enjoy learning just to be lovely. I wasn't good at sports and was too gangly and boob-y to be remotely accepted by most my pre-pubescent peers and being academically bright was all I had until high school when suddenly being over 5' and having boobs was totally normal and I had a bunch of really encouraging and awesome teachers

My AP Euro teacher used me as an example to explain the concept of a 'renaissance man' to the class because I had good grades in AP classes, played an instrument, and was on the football team.

I didn't study at all for the AP test and pulled a 5 on it.

:smugdon:

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:34

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

yeah I really wanna make fun of the lady here because your love language being "giving me poo poo" is p funny but like come on dude missing her birthday and giving her a loving exercise ball for your anniversary is some next level loving up.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:35

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

Anne Whateley posted:

lmao

We're not talking about not dating someone because they hosed other people in the past. That would be slutshaming, sure. We're talking about not dating someone because they're currently hooking up with other people while trying to get with you.

Polyamorous people can do whatever they want, hooray. People who want monogamy just shouldn't date people who don't.

are you slow? NOBODY dates in serial (only goes out with one person 24/7 with zero overlap)

if you decide not to date someone and that reason is their sexual activity then you are slut shaming, period, end of story. you really should familiarize yourself with the current discourse on sex negativity and the patriarchal attempts to sex shame as a form of control

Anne Whateley posted:

Also fwiw discriminating against parents is illegal under the Fair Housing Act, parents are literally a protected class, and children are just evidence of sexhaving, so imo you should look into your heart there

don't just make a word salad of terms from feminist literature in order to try to make me sound like the bad guy

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:35

Galaxy Brain: Dec 13, 2017; by Lowtax

ArbitraryC posted:

yeah I really wanna make fun of the lady here because your love language being "giving me poo poo" is p funny but like come on dude missing her birthday and giving her a loving exercise ball for your anniversary is some next level loving up.

The gift-giving love language thing has been explained like two or three times just in the last couple pages, dude, and I can't imagine it never came up in this thread before.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:39

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

13Pandora13 posted:

I know this is from...pages back but it revived in me a 20 year long rage.

In 4th grade I had a 106 in Science class. I was a really bookish kid in elementary school, I read at recess, etc. - a complete incorrigible nerd. Did extra credit assignments I didn't need for fun to keep my grade over 100.

This little shithead in my class who was failing, or near to, copied my test answers word for word on a chapter test and we both got 0s because "the teacher had no way of knowing who cheated" and that little bitch (gently caress you, Samantha) wouldn't confess while I was crying and begging to not give me a 0. How could you not know which of us cheated, using even a sliver of critical thought? They made me get the test signed by my parents because I "may have cheated" and my grade dropped to a 98.

The next greatest "gently caress you" I got from a teacher was my honors 8th grade history teacher (who I corrected in class because I was an aspie little poo poo that didn't know that was super bad) who refused to write me a recommendation for AP World Geography going into high school, which was required for the class (only for this AP class as the only "freshman" AP offered). Didn't matter that I never dropped below a 95 in his class, he "didn't think I had the emotional maturity for AP" (I graduated with enough AP credits to be a mid-sophomore in college so shows what he loving knew).

In short gently caress bitchy teachers who hold back kids who do well and genuinely enjoy learning just to be lovely. I wasn't good at sports and was too gangly and boob-y to be remotely accepted by most my pre-pubescent peers and being academically bright was all I had until high school when suddenly being over 5' and having boobs was totally normal and I had a bunch of really encouraging and awesome teachers

that sucks

i actually got sent to an alternative school for most of middle school. the assumption is that if you're troubled emotionally you must not be smart, there were no advanced classes and the work was really easy.

i got back into high school, but they wouldn't let me take anything AP. i can understand not allowing calc since they didn't really teach geometry or trig but englishwise i could have done well.

so then in college it sucked doing engineering and all these liberal arts classes... taking 15/18 credits or taking classes over the summer while other breezed by with 12

luckily now i'm a computer toucher and they can pretend they always believed in me when i visit their shithole town at christmas

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:40

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

Moridin920 posted:

My AP Euro teacher used me as an example to explain the concept of a 'renaissance man' to the class because I had good grades in AP classes, played an instrument, and was on the football team.

I didn't study at all for the AP test and pulled a 5 on it.

my english teacher also taught ap english and let me do extra assignments for that class that were AP level (perks of being a wallflower style) but the school wouldn't let you take the AP test if you're not in the ap class :smith:

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:41

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

Galaxy Brain posted:

The gift-giving love language thing has been explained like two or three times just in the last couple pages, dude, and I can't imagine it never came up in this thread before.

it's just dumb because the love language divides gifts from stuff like "acts of service". An act of service is a god drat gift and it is an attentive understanding of that person if it's help you identify they need when they're stressed or upset or whatever.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:42

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

ArbitraryC posted:

it's just dumb because the love language divides gifts from stuff like "acts of service". An act of service is a god drat gift.

is "acts of service "reader's digest speak for oral sex?

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:43

Barudak: May 7, 2007

ArbitraryC posted:

it's just dumb because the love language divides gifts from stuff like "acts of service". An act of service is a god drat gift.

There is a revised edition of the book but nobody read that one!!!

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:43

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

Barudak posted:

There is a revised edition of the book but nobody read that one!!!

holy poo poo i just realized your username is not "babadook"

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:44

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Caganer posted:

holy poo poo i just realized your username is not "babadook"

No no, I'm Baba Mexico, totally different.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:45

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

Barudak posted:

No no, I'm Baba Mexico, totally different.

are you at least also a gay icon?

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:48

dudeness: Mar 5, 2010; Cat Army; Fallen Rib

Download my new app Giftr, we match you with one of our specialists (me) and for a low cost ($50) recommend the perfect present (hillshire farms gift packs) specially suited to each romantic holiday or anniversary.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:51

Galaxy Brain: Dec 13, 2017; by Lowtax

Caganer posted:

is "acts of service "reader's digest speak for oral sex?

No it's stuff like taking care of a chore your SO normally does, solving a problem for them, etc. Barking at your SO that "this counts as a gift!" ArbitraryC style is not advised.

Lmao, this is his excuse for missing her birthday:

Reddit OP posted:

I had planned to just take her out for her birthday to the mall and pick something out, but her birthday fell on Easter and when we got to the mall it was closed, I didn�t realize it would be :/

Is he thirteen.

Galaxy Brain fucked around with this message at 01:55 on Feb 16, 2018

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:53

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

Galaxy Brain posted:

No it's stuff like taking care of a chore your SO normally does, solving a problem for them, etc. Barking at your SO that "this counts as a gift!" ArbitraryC style is not advised.

so basically they operationalized the normal components of a relationship like doing chores for one another? and said pick one and it's your love language?

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:55

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

Galaxy Brain posted:

No it's stuff like taking care of a chore your SO normally does, solving a problem for them, etc. Barking at your SO that "this counts as a gift!" ArbitraryC style is not advised.

I've never had to do any barking because normal people see the love and effort behind those actions and don't go "but he doesn't buy me roses for no reason".

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:55

datajugend: Jan 15, 2010; Cat Army

my love language is pooping with the door open, im keeping a log on it but its getting full

# ? Feb 16, 2018 01:59

13Pandora13: Nov 5, 2008; I've got tiiits that swingle dangle dingle

Moridin920 posted:

My AP Euro teacher used me as an example to explain the concept of a 'renaissance man' to the class because I had good grades in AP classes, played an instrument, and was on the football team.

I didn't study at all for the AP test and pulled a 5 on it.

AP master buddy.

A few years after me my little brother had the same teacher I'd had for APUSH and AP Euro and he went into AUPSH day one like, "oh yeah I'm Dude Pandora, but I just go by Pandora," the teacher looked him dead in the eyes and said, "no. Your sister was Pandora. You are merely Dude," and then flipped him poo poo all year about me getting 5s on both exams.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:02

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

datajugend posted:

my love language is pooping with the door open, im keeping a log on it but its getting full

oh boy searching for "door open" pulled up some gems, first one incoming:

My [24 M] friend [24 F] is leaving the toilet door open. We are not in a relationshipNon-Romantic

quote:

I'm friends with a girl i share numerous interests with. There is nothing that points to her beeing abnormal in any way and although she is slightly eccentric, she is good to spend time with. However, three weeks ago the following occured: i was at her place and she went to the bathroom. When i wandered around in the room i was in, i could see that the bathroom door was only half closed and that my friend was sitting on the toilet, audibly peeing. I thought that the door had come open accidentially and quickly went away but then she started talking to me. A few days later, i visited her again and while we were in the main room of her flat, she suddenly said "excuse me for a minute", went into the bathroom and placed herself on the toilet without closing the door. As she had sat down, she looked up towards me and i looked back. Her pants were at her feet, but her genital area was covered by her shirt. But looking at her from a 45�-angle, her butt was completely visible. She continies our conversation as if nothing was strange while peeing. When i asked her, why she left the door open, she said that she doesn't like enclosing herself and that i didn't have to look if it disturbed me. She then wiped and returned as if this was normal. This repeated itself a few times with the next weeks. She apparently stopped caring if her shirt covered her genital area and seemed to spread her legs while on the toilet. From this, i now not only know how her labia looks, i also learned that girls don't pee straight downwards as i thought but rather into a down-forward direction. She never said anything about me beeing able to see her. When i tried to tell her to stop, she defended her behaviour and said that guys were peeing openly into urinals so she didn't know why females shouls hide.

How can i get her to close the door when she goes to the bathroom? I didn't dare to ask other people if she leaves the toilet door open around them. She is generally a nice person, but i would prefer her not to do this, just as she did before she started leaving the door open.

tl;dr: My friend leaves the toilet door open when i am around which is awkward.

i picture his female friend as the rapist from peep show

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:03

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

Caganer posted:

so basically they operationalized the normal components of a relationship like doing chores for one another? and said pick one and it's your love language?

Love languages are intended to help people see mismatched expectations(because god forbid you just talk about this stuff without taking a quiz about it), so naturally people just look at their top one and go "my love language is ACTS OF SERVICE, so you need to do ALL OF THE CHORES."

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:06

Galaxy Brain: Dec 13, 2017; by Lowtax

Caganer posted:

so basically they operationalized the normal components of a relationship like doing chores for one another? and said pick one and it's your love language?

Man, i hate defending this stuff so much because I haven't even taken the quiz myself, but it's more like all 5 things are really important, but people tend to have one as their go-to when they want to express affection. The book teaches people how to recognize how their SO communicates affection most often, and if the two partners don't communicate in the same way, they can learn how to "speak" the other's "language."

So if say, I appreciate spending time together as a couple most but my SO appreciates "acts of service," we could each be trying to do loving things that are exactly the opposite of what the other wants, me chilling out with my SO which looks like "doing nothing," and him going off to run an errand which looks to me like us not spending time together.

The book is an attempt to teach each people that partners may not express love in the same way, but that doesn't mean love isn't there. It seems comparable to academic learning styles, where a teacher might mistakenly assume a student is stupid because they're a tactile learner and only getting lessons geared towards visual learners, for example.

Really the whole idea of "I love you so I've made the effort to learn what's important to you and make sure I do those things often" is pretty fundamental for a mutually respectful relationship, but anything starts to look weird when it's dissected for educational purposes. Just ask a frog.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:12

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

Me [26F] with my roommates 27M & 27F. They will not leave me alone in the bathroom.Non-Romantic

quote:

First of all I would like to emphasize first that I do not spend a long time in the bathroom (I take <8min showers) and we have 2.5 bathrooms.

Every time I go into the bathroom it seems all of a sudden somebody needs something from me or needs to ask me a question. I'm getting so fed up. In my family growing up we left each other alone in the bathroom. Nobody would try to talk to you or ask you a question. I hate when people yell to me through the door when I'm trying to poop! I'll be in the common area for 3 hours but as soon as I go to the bathroom, that's when everyone needs to know what I want for dinner.

I know there are people who pee with the door open and purposely go to the bathroom with their friends as a bonding experience or something, but I just don't enjoy it. Every time they do this I say I'll speak to you in a minute. I've said several times "don't talk to me while I'm in the bathroom!" What do I need to do? This seems like a crazy thing to have to have a house meeting about but am I at that point? What would you do? Thanks!

tl;dr: Roommates won't leave me alone in the bathroom. I feel like bringing it up would seem dramatic but it's really bugging me. How would you address it? Thanks!

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:17

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

It's never used that way in healthy relationships and every post about it is either one extreme of "I suck at everything but do one good thing for my partner, why don't they respect my love language" or the other "my partner does so much for me but I feel neglected because they don't do the one thing, why don't they respect my love language?"

In an ideal world it'd be used to identify what other people do that suggests they love you, but in r/relationships it's always about what they aren't doing that suggests they don't love them.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:21

Zil: Jun 4, 2011; Satanically Summoned Citrus

Caganer posted:

Me [26F] with my roommates 27M & 27F. They will not leave me alone in the bathroom.Non-Romantic

poo poo with the door open and make eye contact the entire time to maintain dominance.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:21

datajugend: Jan 15, 2010; Cat Army

Caganer posted:

Me [26F] with my roommates 27M & 27F. They will not leave me alone in the bathroom.Non-Romantic

play music?

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:23

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

My [26 M] roommate has turned into the roommate from hell ever since I [26 M] got together with my girlfriend [24 F]. The worst thing is that he constantly keeps his door open while streaming graphic hentai videos and pictures. Are things with my friend irreparable? Should I listen to my girlfriend?

quote:

Background:

For the last two years, I started renting a small townhouse with my good and close friend, "John." I've known John for eight years. He's always been the awkward, weird guy. He is sometimes moody and intense, but he is generally a good guy and largely misunderstood. He is very into anime and has tons of posters, figurines, and regularly attends Anime Expo each year.

I started dating my girlfriend, "Jennifer," about six months ago. Before I got with Jennifer, my roommate was also interested in her. She would come over a few times, but she made it really clear that she wasn't going to be anything but friends with him. Even though this happened, John and Jennifer got along well and she still came over to hang out.

So we all got into a normal routine, Jenn would come over, hang out with John, and then I would pop down make dinner and have dinner with the both of them. Eventually, Jenn and I started to talk to each other, and little by little, I started to really like her. One night, when John was in the restroom, I asked her out and was amazed that the feelings I had were mutual.

Anyways, I wanted to make sure things were okay with John. He said that he was totally cool with us dating and said that he was already interested in someone else. So we started dating. She comes over sometimes during the week and only stays over on weekends to respect John's privacy. John told me that she could still come over whenever she wanted as long as we all could hang out like before.

She hasn't treated John any differently, and out of respect for him, I've tried not to be too physically affectionate with her when we're hanging out. Also, when she's over on the weekends, we are very quiet about being intimate. Most weekends that she is over, we don't do anything but sleep to make sure that John doesn't get weirded out.

My problem:

A month after we started dating, John became the roommate from hell. John started to withdraw and become increasingly brooding. Often, I would see him sulking and depressed. After a bit, he stopped hanging out with Jenn and me. When I asked John if he was okay, he said that he was going through some personal stuff and just not in the mood to hang out. So we started leaving him alone and just enjoying our time together.

It seems as if his personal issues were being expressed in different ways. Before, John was a relatively clean and tidy person. Now, he just leaves his dishes in the sink for weeks. I have reminded him tons of times about doing his dishes. Furthermore, he knows that I am a little particular about sharing personal things, especially my plates, utensils, and cookware, but when he runs out of his dishes, he uses my stuff anyway.

Then, he started leaving his dirty laundry in the hallways. At first it was just his jacket or something, and then slowly it was his dirty socks, and now he just leaves whatever he wants outside his door. When I confronted him about this, he rolled his eyes and just told me that he was too lazy. So I started grabbing garbage bags to bag his poo poo, and toss it into his room when the front of his room was too dirty.

Now, here is the worst thing. John, like I mentioned, is really into anime. And not only anime stories, but also into anime porn, which is called hentai. Usually, he is a really private person, and we don't talk about those subjects at all. If he did get off to this stuff, it was all on his own time.

The first time it happened was about a month ago. I walked by his room and I saw that he was watching a really raunchy anime porn. I was taken aback by what I saw, but I just cleared my throat loudly and walked past his room. Then, I heard the door slam shut. Maybe he forgot to close his door or thought that no one was home. I thought this was an isolated incident, but it happened a few more times. Each time that I saw him though, he wasn't doing anything else but browsing.

After one of these times, I sat down with John when he came downstairs to have dinner and I asked him to start closing his door if he was doing something that was private. John just silently watched me and scoffed as if I was saying something unreasonable. He apologized, but it didn't seem like it was sincere. I told Jenn about what was going on, but she dismissed it.

Anyways, the last straw for me was last week. Jenn came over and after saying hi to John, she came to my room to hang out. After mulling our evening plans for awhile, we decided to catch a movie. Jenn went to John's room to ask him if he wanted to tag along. All of a sudden I heard her scream, followed by John's door slamming shut.

After calming down a bit, Jenn told me that when she went over to John's room, John's door was half closed and she heard soft voices coming from his door. It wasn't uncommon for John to watch anime with his speakers on, so Jenn just pushed the door open. She said that she felt like bleaching her eyes out. Basically she saw something with tentacles doing nasty things to an anime girl. However, that wasn't what caused her to scream. She screamed when she saw that John was standing in front of his monitor, hands down his pants, and masturbating furiously. She says she didn't see his penis, but she at least saw him making the motions in his pants. I asked if she wanted to call the cops or something, but she didn't feel threatened just perved out by him.

Now, Jenn won't come over to our place anymore, wants me to cut ties with John, and move in with her. I agree that Jenn shouldn't come over anymore since it is obviously upsetting. There are two main problems though, Jenn really wants me to leave my friend. However, I've only been with Jenn for six months. It feels like that's not long enough for me to make any long term plans with someone I've known for so little time.

Also, I'm not sure what to do about my roommate. I'm not sure if why his behavior has changed so drastically since I started dating Jenn. I wish I could understand him because he was really a pretty good friend. It's a shame if I can't repair my friendship with him since it's been so long. What do you guys think I should do?

LMFAO at calling the police because you walked into your roommate's room without knocking and he was jerking it

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:24

CheesyDog: Jul 4, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

Call the police on all anime

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:29

tactlessbastard: Feb 4, 2001; Godspeed, post; Fun Shoe

Moridin920 posted:

My AP Euro teacher used me as an example to explain the concept of a 'renaissance man' to the class because I had good grades in AP classes, played an instrument, and was on the football team.

I didn't study at all for the AP test and pulled a 5 on it.

I can't even imagine what possessed you to repeat that, even if it was true. How gauche.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:31

dudeness: Mar 5, 2010; Cat Army; Fallen Rib

John did him a favor and now he gets to move in with his girlfriend, he is just too dumb to realize it and he deserves to be stuck with his hentai garbage friend.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:32

John Wick of Dogs: Mar 4, 2017; A real hellraiser

He should move it simply cause John is probably watching some perverted illegal poo poo, and one night the cops are gonna bust in

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:45

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

Caganer posted:

My [26 M] roommate has turned into the roommate from hell ever since I [26 M] got together with my girlfriend [24 F]. The worst thing is that he constantly keeps his door open while streaming graphic hentai videos and pictures. Are things with my friend irreparable? Should I listen to my girlfriend?

LMFAO at calling the police because you walked into your roommate's room without knocking and he was jerking it

the comments from OP are even better:

redditor posted:

Wait. You asked her if she wanted to call the cops because she found your roommate jerking off in his own room in the apartment he pays for?

roommate posted:
I feel like when I was writing my post I left out some parts. The problem is that this was all a she-said-he-said account to me when she told me what happened. I left out a specific part that seemed very unlike my roommate. Basically, after she screamed, she was so in shock that she kept watching for the next two seconds, when my roommate sprung up and in her own words as best as I can remember "he moved so quickly to the door that he looked like he was going to tackle me or hurt me--but then he closed the door." Furthermore, she made a few menacing gestures towards her. When I asked her to elaborate, she just said that she felt like he wanted to hurt her. The John that I know, despite his unpleasantness would never make those menacing gestures even if provoked.

redditor posted:
Yeah, really strange for a guy who gets walked in on while masturbating to jump at the door to close it.

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:47

andrew smash: Jun 26, 2006; smooth soul

Moridin920 posted:

My AP Euro teacher used me as an example to explain the concept of a 'renaissance man' to the class because I had good grades in AP classes, played an instrument, and was on the football team.

I didn't study at all for the AP test and pulled a 5 on it.

peaked early huh

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:48

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 2, 2024 20:22

SuddenExpire: Jun 29, 2005; expired...

andrew smash posted:

peaked early huh

# ? Feb 16, 2018 02:56

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

«‹›6020 »