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ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!
I don’t get why people who I am noticeably mortally terrified of wont gently caress a baby into me. :downs:

Hey but if you just can’t wait a little while to make your stupid little pussy quiver go ahead and gently caress your parents I guess. :jerkbag:

ClamdestineBoyster fucked around with this message at 19:38 on Mar 22, 2018

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Caganer
Feb 15, 2018

Avenging_Mikon posted:

Weed, fine, but casual psychedelic use, from what I understand, can really gently caress you up long-term. Or is that refeer madness type poo poo?

Regardless, if he is doing mdma and psychs, he was selling mdma and psychs.

every high has a low, if you do them too often you have the opposite effect after - less seretonin than normal, more depression

Doggles
Apr 22, 2007

My [25F] boyfriend [26M] of 6 years blew almost $398k in online sports betting. He's not recovering well from this loss and it's negatively affecting his health and our relationship.

quote:

This is longer than I intend it to be. TL;DR at the bottom.

Overall my boyfriend is proven to be loyal, kind, caring, and trustworthy. He is also smart, and on top of his class. Once graduated, we both landed on the same line of work. We earn a decent amount of money, also without debts. I thought we could save pretty much quickly and be financially independent by mid 40s instead of 60s.

He had bigger and higher ambition. He is success-driven, and passionate to make millions before the age of 30. People around us praise him for being positive and highly motivated to learn. Some of our pees with age group of 3 to 10 years older than us expressed their admiration for him. Everyone felt like he was the one to be successful soon.

On July 2017, he told me there is a faster way to earn more by doing less. And I was like "Okay. What is it?" He then told me, "sports betting." I was against the idea of gambling because my grandfather, and mother are both gamblers who brought negativity and debt to our family. However, I believe in my boyfriend's capabilities that I enabled him.

For the first week of online betting, he earned $1500+. The next week, $800+. He then encouraged me to also try it. I did considering how much he earned, and he bet a total of 17 basketball games then and he won 15 of it. We were balling, just in two months he earned $14400+, and $8100+ for me.

I saved the $4000, spend the other half replacing my broken phone $800 and helping my mom coming out of a tough financial situation about $3300. While he intended not to save or invest anything of it despite much encouragement that came from me. No one knows he gambles because his parents and his friends don't approve of it.

Fast forward first week of October 2017, I was devastated to know he lost almost half of his earnings from gambling. We didn't talk much because of our work schedule during August & September. I was really surprised he lost $21000, and he only got $25000+ in his earnings. He earned big by betting big, almost as much as his monthly salary. I was also giving him money to bet for me up until this time. I sacked $6600 in savings while spent $5200. This is when I stopped and told him to stop too. He then refused and said this is part of the risk. I remained supportive. He kept promising me that he will be more smart in handling his finance. He kept losing and losing. He stopped eating his healthy prep meals and vegetables instead he ate junk. He never went to gym again. He doesn't sleep at night on most days and gets tardy in meetings, work, family time, and dates. I also felt being used for sex as a stress reliever.

Then comes November 2017, he brought bad news that not only he lost all of his earnings but also he used his savings and investments to earn back these losses. I was completely shocked. I ask him to back away from gambling a bit as he is clearly losing way too much. He refused stating this is the only way he could earn back his lost money. In his plea, he needs big money so he could gamble. The $6600 I stashed away went back to him. I trusted him, I also questioned him a lot if this the choice he wanted to make. I suggested to just save it, or invest in stocks or mutual funds. He was determined to win in gambling and so I let him. I tried to be supportive and be therapeutic but sometimes I get frustrated and curse him when he losses when I told him to be smart about betting big. We fight constantly.

Late December 2017, approaching holidays, he lost all his savings. Only $550 was left in his account. He bet away his bonuses, salary, savings and investments in hopes of being rich fast. He lost a total of almost $398k. It was the most drastic and devastating part of his life, and in our relationship. Noone close to us knew, we only had each other.

In order for him to cover up his failed gambling, I gave him $4200 for the holidays and start afresh this 2018. He could do whatever with that cash. I asled him sincerely to smartly save again and to never gamble. He kept promising me again that he learned his lessons so he won't do stupid decision.

He did save so from late December to first week of March. During this time he changed a lot, he is more anxious about making financial decisions. He feels like he is being left out. He feels inferior, and less successful than his peers. He doesn't trust his individual decision in anything about money. He had to seek validation from me, and that gets me frustrated. I got burned out and told him to stop thinking about the past, and just move forward. We constantly fight because he wants to return gambling and i just want him to save up.

He eventually returned to online sports betting this March. I was angry at him. He asked me to give him another chance, if he lost just $300 then he'll stop for good. I wanted to believe in him, he kept breaking his promises to me and doesn't listen to me about finance. He has $20k now. However, he keeps losing sleep, not exercising, and eating junk. He kept thing badly about himself on how stupid he is, he doesn't feel confident in saving and investing. He direct his frustrations towards me and that gets me mad. We fight on bad days, and on good days we talked about starting fresh and be motivated. It's a roller coaster.

TL;DR: My boyfriend that I admire so much blew $398k in online sports betting in just 5 months. He lost all his savings, investments, salary, and bonuses last December. He promised to stop and save. He has about $20k now but started betting again. He asked me to give another chance, and let him bet. However his health is deteriorating because of betting again. How do I deal with this? This keeps upsetting me. His health and our relationship is in bad shape. I don't want to break up but I don't want to stay in this kind of situation. I want to help but at the same time I feel anger and pity.

boner confessor
Apr 25, 2013

by R. Guyovich

Avenging_Mikon posted:

Weed, fine, but casual psychedelic use, from what I understand, can really gently caress you up long-term. Or is that refeer madness type poo poo?

casual psychedelic use isn't a big deal from a health standpoint. chronic repeated use can start messing up your brain, and any amount of use can trigger as of yet undeveloped schizophrenia and other latent illnesses since drug use is very similar to a temporarily induced mental illness

the bigger problem is that casually dropping acid on a lazy sunday is a huge sign of immaturity. using psychedelics is a multi-hour commitment, there's no commonly available drug (other than salvia, which is horrible) which doesn't last less than four hours minimum. so this is a long period of time this dude is blocking aside on the weekend to get hosed up. also, the more worries you have on your mind when you trip, the more likely you are to focus on those worries and have a bad time. part of being a young adult is generally having less poo poo to care about than adults, which is why adults usually stop doing psychedelics entirely or stick to rare occasions.

girlfriend is 100% right about this dude being less of an adult. whether he needs to be an adult at the age of 24 is debatable, but it's a big source of conflict in their relationship and he needs to choose between his lifestyle or his girlfriend

new phone who dis
May 24, 2007

by VideoGames
Morbid Hound
Ecstasy is a fantastic drug to do once or twice but yeah, constant use will turn you into a burnout and leave your life feeling hollow because nothing ever makes you feel that good again.

Baronjutter
Dec 31, 2007

"Tiny Trains"

Gambling addiction is an instant deal breaker you need to run fast and far from.

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Doggles posted:

My [25F] boyfriend [26M] of 6 years blew almost $398k in online sports betting. He's not recovering well from this loss and it's negatively affecting his health and our relationship.

this guy is behaving exactly like a drug addict

John Wick of Dogs
Mar 4, 2017

A real hellraiser


You had $398k in your twenties you were already rich you loving dipshit!

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Al Borland Corp. posted:

You had $398k in your twenties you were already rich you loving dipshit!

If I had $398K I would buy a house

like, an actual single-family house in a good neighborhood

the dream

Don't mind me, thread, I'm just bashing my head against the Boston real-estate market

Bunni-kat
May 25, 2010

Service Desk B-b-bunny...
How can-ca-caaaaan I
help-p-p-p you?

boner confessor posted:

can trigger as of yet undeveloped schizophrenia and other latent illnesses

I think that's what I was remembering, and my brain probably inflated it a bit as well.

My brain's broken enough without taking stuff like that, so I've never tried.

Caganer
Feb 15, 2018

loquacius posted:

If I had $398K I would buy a house

like, an actual single-family house in a good neighborhood

the dream

Don't mind me, thread, I'm just bashing my head against the Boston real-estate market

meh I'd invest it and work another 5 or so years then retire super early

dudeness
Mar 5, 2010

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:
Fallen Rib
Sounds like he could've been a millionaire by his 30's by just investing his money into running a sports gambling website.

Barudak
May 7, 2007

Doggles posted:

My [25F] boyfriend [26M] of 6 years blew almost $398k in online sports betting. He's not recovering well from this loss and it's negatively affecting his health and our relationship.

On the brightside, you put a bookies kid through college.

boner confessor
Apr 25, 2013

by R. Guyovich

new phone who dis posted:

Ecstasy is a fantastic drug to do once or twice but yeah, constant use will turn you into a burnout and leave your life feeling hollow because nothing ever makes you feel that good again.

i wouldn't call ecstacy a psychedelic, it's more of an stimulant and entactogen. the dangerous part being an entactogen, aka something which directly fucks with your brain's ability to produce happy neurotransmitters. abusing these can damage your brain for sure. psychedelics generally don't do any damage to the brain but can mess up your thinking through abuse

Avenging_Mikon posted:

I think that's what I was remembering, and my brain probably inflated it a bit as well.

My brain's broken enough without taking stuff like that, so I've never tried.

there's some clinical potential for theraputic use of psychedelics but yeah, its generally safer to avoid them. i think most people could get some benefit out of tripping once but there's a large class of folks for who the danger outweighs the benefit

it's a young man's game though, peak time to try them is in your early twenties. they're generally not as fun if you spend the entire trip worrying if your sleeping kid in the next room is still there, or if you've paid the power bill etc.

loquacius posted:

this guy is behaving exactly like a drug addict

yeah gambling is a full on addiction. the happy chemicals you get in your brain from gambling are the same as any other intensely pleasurable activity like drugs or sex, things you can also get psychologically addicted too

boner confessor fucked around with this message at 20:02 on Mar 22, 2018

LadyPictureShow
Nov 18, 2005

Success!



Doggles posted:

My [25F] boyfriend [26M] of 6 years blew almost $398k in online sports betting. He's not recovering well from this loss and it's negatively affecting his health and our relationship.

Hahaha holy poo poo. The guy that lost $30,000 on ‘safe bets’ was funny enough, but this bozo is a in a whole nother stratosphere.

I wonder if he was also gambling on total locks in the NCAA tournament.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!
Hi im a trans man who has feminine features and you are a bisexual woman who is afraid of men but attracted to me because I’m a genuinely nice person who is a little girly but primarily straight except when menstruating. I am also transitioning back to a male as I was born as and I don’t think it would be fair to you, someone who is about as gay as I am straight, to start a sexually intimate relationship under the false pretense of remaining trans.

Girl: gently caress you you human being rapist stop jerking off to your misogynist porn with men in it and gently caress a baby into me I’m not at all crazy and have thought this out and I’m basing all my self value on someone else’s validation and reciprocation of love, which they are trying to express in any way they can but I won’t ultimately accept without an actual penis in me, and expect them to fall in love too but then gently caress off and just be a stud horse who I can tolerate for short periods of time while i put on my best bullshit act and they won’t have emotions about it and can’t be hurt because men are fake people.

Baronjutter
Dec 31, 2007

"Tiny Trains"

Family friend's mom had about 5 million in the bank when she retired, she always liked to go to the casino now and again for special occasions but was always defensive about it being just for fun. Within a few years of her retirement she had to sell her home, a couple years after that she's living off government assistance and her cash-strapped very not rich kids are paying to keep food on her table.

Caganer
Feb 15, 2018

Avenging_Mikon posted:

Fully agreed. If the only consideration is ethics, she did rape by deception, he should get the kid, and she should pay child support while also having no contact, unless there's an abortion, which would probably end up best for everyone.

she should be jailed. consent obtained via deception is not consent.

Baronjutter posted:

Family friend's mom had about 5 million in the bank when she retired, she always liked to go to the casino now and again for special occasions but was always defensive about it being just for fun. Within a few years of her retirement she had to sell her home, a couple years after that she's living off government assistance and her cash-strapped very not rich kids are paying to keep food on her table.

I have really mixed feelings about casinos.

On one hand, they are undeniably exploitative.

On the other hand, people fuckin' love to gamble. I come from an Italian family and there have always been lotteries/bookies etc whether or not it's legal. The difference is these people deal with debt collectors / courts, not leg breakers or cement shoes.

I don't *like* casinos but I think they're a nessecary evil because the alternative is far, far worse.

Caganer fucked around with this message at 20:06 on Mar 22, 2018

But Rocks Hurt Head
Jun 30, 2003

by Hand Knit
Pillbug

loquacius posted:



Don't mind me, thread, I'm just bashing my head against the Boston real-estate market

Oh can I join you, I've been looking in Boston for a year or so and it makes me want to die

Meme Poker Party
Sep 1, 2006

by Azathoth
Hey girlfriend, isn't it great how we have hundreds of thousands of dollars in liquid assets in our 20's? Really glad about all that hard work and merit we definitely did with no late stage capitalism involved at all. But I've discovered one weird trick to becoming every more deserving of violent revolution. Have you heard of.... gambling???? It can't fail, babe! We're gonna be rich(er)!!!

boner confessor
Apr 25, 2013

by R. Guyovich

Caganer posted:

On the other hand, people fuckin' love to gamble. I come from an Italian family and there have always been lotteries/bookies etc whether or not it's legal. The difference is these people deal with debt collectors / courts, not leg breakers or cement shoes.

I don't *like* casinos but I think they're a nessecary evil because the alternative is far, far worse.

all gambling should be nationalized or government controlled so the profits dont go into someone's pocket but rather can be used for public good. the state lottery paid for my college education, that was great - thanks gamblers!

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

But Rocks Hurt Head posted:

Oh can I join you, I've been looking in Boston for a year or so and it makes me want to die

Sure, the more the merrier :)

By which I mean our city's particular economic niche has resulted in far, far more rich yuppie assholes than its size can possibly support, resulting in an uncontrollable cost-of-living spiral as everyone knife-fights in the streets over our meager housing supply and none of us are particularly "merry" at this point in time

It's gonna be even more fun when Amazon's HQ2 finally comes to town :shepicide:

for the record btw $398K is not nearly enough to buy one of these houses outright but it'd make for a much nicer down-payment than I can currently afford

Jeza
Feb 13, 2011

The cries of the dead are terrible indeed; you should try not to hear them.
It's possible to do drugs on weekends and still have your poo poo together, and not every psychedelic is a 12 hour commitment to a magical adventure in your living room. I think sacrificing all drug use during the week at her request is already a show of commitment. His gf was fine about it for ages but is changing her stance, so she's the one who's getting frustrated that she can't change her partner to be more like how she wants him to be. The ball is in her court, if she can't morality police him into doing what she wants then she can leave.

Of course, if he's not lying and he actually spends every weekend just strung out or whatever. More likely it's just one of those common situations where one partner disapproves of some aspect of their partner's character but pretends they don't with the intention of adjusting them further down the line.

Caganer
Feb 15, 2018

loquacius posted:

Sure, the more the merrier :)

By which I mean our city's particular economic niche has resulted in far, far more rich yuppie assholes than its size can possibly support, resulting in an uncontrollable cost-of-living spiral as everyone knife-fights in the streets over our meager housing supply and none of us are particularly "merry" at this point in time

It's gonna be even more fun when Amazon's HQ2 finally comes to town :shepicide:

for the record btw $398K is not nearly enough to buy one of these houses outright but it'd make for a much nicer down-payment than I can currently afford

Amazon is probably coming to the DMV.

I think most people forget how many data centers they have out there.

I've heard some scuttlebut too, DC area stuff getting lots of hits from Amazon owned IPs

bird with big dick
Oct 21, 2015

girl pants posted:

I [35 M] caught using a hidden camera to peek at my sister-in-law [22 F] naked. I'm as hosed as hosed can be.


gosh i was just SO HORNY i just COULD NOT HELP MYSELF! it wasn't me it was my INFERNAL DICK!

Dude missed the obvious way to get out of this which is to make a video of himself in the shower using the pen doing all kinds of ridiculous hip gyrations and dick waggling and then show it to his wife under the guise of spicing up their sex life. Bam, totally legit reason for the pen to be there.

Bunni-kat
May 25, 2010

Service Desk B-b-bunny...
How can-ca-caaaaan I
help-p-p-p you?

boner confessor posted:

there's some clinical potential for theraputic use of psychedelics but yeah, its generally safer to avoid them. i think most people could get some benefit out of tripping once but there's a large class of folks for who the danger outweighs the benefit

From most of what I've heard, the main two use cases for therapeutic psychedelics is for people with PTSD, or various things involving micro-doses, which are sub-psychoactive levels. It's interesting poo poo.

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Caganer posted:

Amazon is probably coming to the DMV.

I think most people forget how many data centers they have out there.

I've heard some scuttlebut too, DC area stuff getting lots of hits from Amazon owned IPs

I hope for my sake you're right

veiled boner fuel posted:

Dude missed the obvious way to get out of this which is to make a video of himself in the shower using the pen doing all kinds of ridiculous hip gyrations and dick waggling and then show it to his wife under the guise of spicing up their sex life. Bam, totally legit reason for the pen to be there.

Why would it need to be a spycam for this though, if he was gonna tape himself in the shower he could use a regular camera

I mean, I think thread consensus was that that post was veiled boner fuel anyway so

Caganer
Feb 15, 2018

loquacius posted:

I hope for my sake you're right

also don't discount the fact they want to kiss the us govts rear end

(especially with talk of amazon being regulated by ftc)

as for boston i have never been there and know no one there so if they go i will just be like HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES

bird with big dick
Oct 21, 2015

loquacius posted:

I hope for my sake you're right


Why would it need to be a spycam for this though, if he was gonna tape himself in the shower he could use a regular camera

I mean, I think thread consensus was that that post was veiled boner fuel anyway so

Use every camera in the house for multiple angles, edit it all together with star wipes.

new boot goofin
Jul 23, 2007

like school in july
My [23M] girlfriend of 3,5 years [24F] is spending vast amounts of money on dog pshychics.Non-Romantic

submitted 6 hours ago * by ThRoWaWaY160691 posted:


Throwaway account since my GF knows my main username.

So, a bit of context; We live together, and thus pay for a lot of food, utility etc together. We have a dog who is 14 years old, and my GF has had her since she was a puppy, so she cares about the dog a LOT. (I do too, I love that dog).

Some other context is that my GF and her mother are quite the believers in the spiritual world, ghosts, psychics, etc. I´m a huge sceptic myself (my GF is well aware), but I´ve never cared too much, because people can believe whatever they want for what I care. I just smile and nod whenever it comes up at family gatherings, and I would NEVER argue against their beliefs.

Our dog had a little sickness scare just before christmas, and we had her in for a full check at the vet. They didn´t find anything. She then had a UTI in early March, and has just gotten over it.

And lastly, I have just been unemployed for six months, and started working again three weeks ago, so I have not yet gotten my first paycheck. Hence, I am really broke and behind on a LOT of bills, and probably won´t have money to spend on things other than food and bills for a few more months. My GF is also not in the strongest financial position, and makes just enough to make ends meet every month. (This will all change when I get my paycheck though)

So today, my GF calls me and tells me she had our dog "read" by a long-distance psychic who they have used throughout the years. She said the dog is tired and recuperating, and feels some pain in her belly that she wants us to get checked. So my GF has booked an appointment with the vet (which is expensive, its a high-end clinic and she refuses to go elsewhere). The odd part of this is literally this morning our dog woke me up wanting to play, and I tried feeling her belly, and she didn´t show any signs of pain or discomfort. She actually seemed happy to get a bellyrub.

Now, I´m not saying I am a professional and know if there´s anything wrong with the dog. And I wouldn´t have minded having her checked at the vet if she didn´t have a full checkup just a few months ago and was fine. But what bothers me is this dog-psychic "controlling" our concerns for the dogs wellbeing, as well as the costs associated with both that and the vet. We don´t have money for bills, and somehow this gets priority.

How can I try to go about telling her that I think it is unnecessary to spend that amount of money on the psychic and her recommendations without insulting her beliefs? Again, to stress, I care about the dog, and I wouldn´t mind taking her to the vet, except we just went.

TL;DR: GF using money we don´t have on dog psychic, I don´t believe in it or agree with it. How can I argue against it?

EDIT: Bad phrasing above. By "money we don´t have" I don´t mean she is taking up credit, but I´m scared this will cause her to fall behind on other bills, starting an unfortunate downward spiral financially.

EDIT 2: After talking it over, she decided to cancel the vet appointment and we´ll see how the dog acts the next few days.

EDIT 3: For those saying I should break up with her; that´s not gonna happen. She´s perfect in literally every way. She has this one quirk that is barely consequential for our future together. We have been together through loss of employment, housing and family members, this little thing is nothing, I just wanted some advice on how to tackle a delicate subject without being an insulting dick towards her.

Barudak
May 7, 2007

Im sick of these people posting stories about their perfect spouses just rubbing it in our faces with. We get it, your dog psychic using girlfriend was hand molded by brahama as a karmic reward before you escape samsara just give it a loving rest because not all or us have such a dharma.

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Tbf though I'd be kinda mad too if I asked the internet what to say to my hippie crystal chakra yoga girlfriend to get her to stop paying for dog psychics and all I got was ":sever:"

sorry babe, this was one dog-psychic visit too far

tactlessbastard
Feb 4, 2001

Godspeed, post
Fun Shoe

quote:

She has this one quirk that is barely consequential for our future together. 

Is it, though?

Bored
Jul 26, 2007

Dude, ix-nay on the oice-vay.

HOT BREAD! posted:

My [23M] girlfriend of 3,5 years [24F] is spending vast amounts of money on dog pshychics.Non-Romantic

I tried finding a clip of the animal planet pet psychic show where she exclaims,"You have a gay bird!" But all I can find is her talking to a lonely cockatiel. I never watched the show, because psychics aren't real, but it was in the ad and made me giggle. Google search did give me several scientific journals articles on the evolutionary benefits of gay birds.

Anytime I hear anything about pet psychics, "You have a gay bird!" goes through my head.

Bored fucked around with this message at 20:59 on Mar 22, 2018

Caganer
Feb 15, 2018

loquacius posted:

Tbf though I'd be kinda mad too if I asked the internet what to say to my hippie crystal chakra yoga girlfriend to get her to stop paying for dog psychics and all I got was ":sever:"

sorry babe, this was one dog-psychic visit too far

But if she thought an invisible sky mandesert man said no bacon cheeseburgers we’d respect that? 🙄

Double standards 😤

Jeza
Feb 13, 2011

The cries of the dead are terrible indeed; you should try not to hear them.
one tiny inexplicable flaw of that level of stupidity is enough to ruin the most perfect human because on some level it must inform every other aspect of their lives. some part of them is broken because it's not possible to hold a cohesive world view where dog psychics are valid and you arent totally nutso in other ways.

boner confessor
Apr 25, 2013

by R. Guyovich

Jeza posted:

one tiny inexplicable flaw of that level of stupidity is enough to ruin the most perfect human because on some level it must inform every other aspect of their lives. some part of them is broken because it's not possible to hold a cohesive world view where dog psychics are valid and you arent totally nutso in other ways.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-xiFI6SldM

A Wizard of Goatse
Dec 14, 2014

HOT BREAD! posted:

My [23M] girlfriend of 3,5 years [24F] is spending vast amounts of money on dog pshychics.Non-Romantic

I thought the dog reiki place up in Hampden had it all figured out but this is the true ultimate lazy man's business model

I like the OP's cautious skepticism over whether this strange huckster can really read his dog's mind over the phone, they really are two peas in a pod

A Wizard of Goatse fucked around with this message at 21:46 on Mar 22, 2018

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Caganer posted:

But if she thought an invisible sky mandesert man said no bacon cheeseburgers we’d respect that? 🙄

Double standards 😤

Dude, that's what I'm saying

I dunno, my mom is a little woo-woo crystalhippie sometimes and I don't wanna :sever: her even if I don't actually believe she has a gluten intolerance

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ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!
Stop internally mocking and second guessing your empathic third eye IDIOT! :catbert:

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