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A Wizard of Goatse posted:lmao don't ever leave your gated community you utter goof.
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Mar 24, 2018 15:53
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There's not really a way that "black male under the influence of narcotics brandishes unregistered firearm around baby" ends positively
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Mar 24, 2018 16:04
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I'm in a pretty nice, quiet part of town, all old white folks and craftsman houses and deer in the backyard, but it's still a part of town so I spent Wednesday morning before last listening to a couple bangers down the block light up an ambulance. Before this I was in literally one of the richest suburbs in the country and literally got my door busted in by a home invader who started attacking people in their beds, and only stopped when I brought a shotgun into the mix. There physically isn't enough space to fit everyone in America into whatever parts of it where someone can become a grown-rear end adult seriously believing calling a gang of muggers on their bullshit means they're gonna sulk off kicking their feet in the dirt like naughty children, and suggesting everyone move there as a solution to the existence of violence is the height of let-them-eat-cakeism Still, don't surprise your spouse with secret guns A Wizard of Goatse fucked around with this message at 16:13 on Mar 24, 2018 |
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Mar 24, 2018 16:05
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Not everybody can move out of Bad Places. This OP can, though. He can go with his wife to her mom's house until they figure something else out with their fancy degrees. If he feels so unsafe where he is that he needs to carry around unregistered firearms, he should probably do that.
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Mar 24, 2018 16:08
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The "he did the right thing with his gun" people are ignoring that he just whipped it out and pointed it at a guy’s forehead. That’s illegal. At that point in time he had nothing beyond his instincts saying there was a problem, so he threatened a guy with death overtly. Cops roll up, and if they’re doing their jobs properly he’s still hosed. And how about if guy around the building had a gun? OP was speaking loud enough for that guy to hear him. Two options for robber 2: circle around building and get drop on OP, or take wife hostage. He acted irresponsibly and dangerously. She should leave him because he’s a loving moron.
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Mar 24, 2018 16:23
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Never, ever point your gun at anyone you do not intend to kill. If you are threatened enough to draw your weapon, you are threatened enough to fire it. If not, do not pull out your gun. Period.
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Mar 24, 2018 16:26
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The Good Guy With A Gun fantasy is just that, a fantasy.
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Mar 24, 2018 16:31
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Maybe he didn't tell her about the gun because she is so vehemently anti-gun and would demand he get rid of it, like she has, despite the fact he believes it's necessary for where they live. He should not have pulled out the gun imo, but it was probably OK to take it with him out of the car just in case. People are questioning his read of the situation, but I think you have to give him the benefit of the doubt. It's his neighbourhood. It's loving weird to have two guys loitering outside a gas station, and then one of them hides around the corner for when his wife walks out. Little tidbit in the story is that he's owned that gun since he was 12, which tells you enough. Yes, it's a retarded escalation. He admits it and says he never would have done it if he wasn't under the influence. But that's a Catch-22, "oh I'm too hosed up to use a weapon, make a truly informed judgement or get into a fight, guess I'll just sit here and watch my wife get assaulted instead lol".
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Mar 24, 2018 16:32
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It’s made up.
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Mar 24, 2018 16:32
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You can tell if someone is a responsible gun owner because you never, ever see their gun and they don't talk about it.
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Mar 24, 2018 16:33
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I honestly love how mad people get about guns. Especially people who know nothing about them. Guns seem to be a subject that when you bring it up, all rational discourse stops because the most extreme voices on either side scream as loudly as possible until everyone is fed up with the entries discussion.
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Mar 24, 2018 16:33
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Avenging_Mikon posted:The "he did the right thing with his gun" people are ignoring that he just whipped it out and pointed it at a guy’s forehead. Yeah this is what jumped out at me and I think is being ignored. He drew first. Maybe his instincts are right but his wife came out to watch her husband just randomly put a gun to another person's head. He's a bad gun-owner and if the cops had shown up he probably would've been killed right there on the spot.
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Mar 24, 2018 16:37
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therobit posted:I honestly love how mad people get about guns. Especially people who know nothing about them. I'm the responsible gun owner who only pulls out my unregistered handgun and points it at people when I'm hopped up on painkillers
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Mar 24, 2018 16:43
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:There physically isn't enough space to fit everyone in America into whatever parts of it where someone can become a grown-rear end adult seriously believing calling a gang of muggers on their bullshit means they're gonna sulk off kicking their feet in the dirt like naughty children It's why I said "unless he left something out". And even if he left out important stuff, you generally don't wanna escalate poo poo with people who live near you. Khorne fucked around with this message at 20:37 on Mar 24, 2018 |
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Mar 24, 2018 16:45
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Jeza posted:Maybe he didn't tell her about the gun because she is so vehemently anti-gun and would demand he get rid of it, like she has, despite the fact he believes it's necessary for where they live. Pro-tip: Do not lie to your partner about that kind of thing. Do not have children with someone you cannot even be honest with. Jeza posted:Yes, it's a retarded escalation. He admits it and says he never would have done it if he wasn't under the influence. But that's a Catch-22, "oh I'm too hosed up to use a weapon, make a truly informed judgement or get into a fight, guess I'll just sit here and watch my wife get assaulted instead lol". Oh, he's only a threat when he's zonked out on his meds. That's okay, then. It's not like the situation came up right as it turned out he was lying to his partner about some other pretty important poo poo.
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Mar 24, 2018 16:48
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I [28F] want to travel, get married, buy a house, get a pet etc but partner [28M] of 4years says i should be happy just to go to the supermarket together. Am i being demanding? As the title says, i want to do things with my life. I just got back from a 10day overseas trip alone, and yet this morning my partner said i should be more independent. Id love to go to japan, but he says hes "not feeling it atm"/wants to save for a house first and says "you can go if you really want" (meaning by myself). He says hes wanted to buy a home for the last 6years but he finds it too exhausting to even look at any online, and doesn't want to get married till hes bought a house and settled in. He says he wants to do all these things but when i try to make it a reality he comes up with 101 excuses. Its not money related as ive offered to pay for trips and tried to meet halfway but he says people in relationships should be their own person and shouldn't have to compromise anything, and that i should be happy just to spend time with him at home. Part of me feels demanding, but part of me also feels i shouldn't get excited just because he agreed to come to the cornerstore with me once every two weeks. He thinks im making him feel guilty. Is it a bad thing that i want to share these life experiences with my partner instead of waste away in front of the tv? He has had depression before, but has stated that he feels good lately. If it was up to him (which it is, as he gets angry whenever i try to motivate him to do anything so i back off) he would spend his life gaming or watching anime while i bring him dinner but if i tell him im not going to baby him and he needs to take more responsibility he gets his feelings hurt. He has a nice car, good career and doesnt party, i know he could achieve whatever he wanted, but hes sensitive and seemingly lazy to the point of taking more and more days off work, turning up late regularly, and not doing his share of housework. I love this man but im at my wits end, am i being a nag/unrealistic or is he just happy to be in his little bubble forever? ***TL;DR Partner is happy to watch anime his whole life, thinks im being clingy and should be happy sitting at home with him.
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Mar 24, 2018 16:57
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Likes anime and video games but doesn't wanna go to Japan? He cheatin'.
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Mar 24, 2018 16:59
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Cat Army
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I do wonder if men feel emasculated in this age when few of them can support a family on their own and women are pretty much as well off without them.
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Mar 24, 2018 17:00
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Smirking_Serpent posted:I [28F] want to travel, get married, buy a house, get a pet etc but partner [28M] of 4years says i should be happy just to go to the supermarket together. Am i being demanding? As long as he has his animes and chicken nugs he has no motivation to change. Just let him go full hikikomori by himself.
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Mar 24, 2018 17:01
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Zulily Zoetrope posted:Pro-tip: Do not lie to your partner about that kind of thing. Do not have children with someone you cannot even be honest with. Keeping secrets isn't the same as lying. Yes, this is a big secret to have, but the justification is for their overall safety, something he is in a much better position to judge given they are living in the neighbourhood he grew up in. Not sure what other important poo poo you're referring to.
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Mar 24, 2018 17:06
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Smirking_Serpent posted:I [28F] want to travel, get married, buy a house, get a pet etc but partner [28M] of 4years says i should be happy just to go to the supermarket together. Am i being demanding? dude sounds depressed as hell, 
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Mar 24, 2018 17:09
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Jeza posted:Maybe he didn't tell her about the gun because she is so vehemently anti-gun and would demand he get rid of it, like she has, despite the fact he believes it's necessary for where they live. He should not have pulled out the gun imo, but it was probably OK to take it with him out of the car just in case. People are questioning his read of the situation, but I think you have to give him the benefit of the doubt. It's his neighbourhood. It's loving weird to have two guys loitering outside a gas station, and then one of them hides around the corner for when his wife walks out. Little tidbit in the story is that he's owned that gun since he was 12, which tells you enough. The solution to this conundrum is have a serious conversation about your guns well in advance of getting loving married, and if the two of you can't come to a halfway sane arrangement leave them to find someone who can, don't go behind their back and make it impossible for them to reasonably account for relevant safety things like the loving gun in the car while trying to wrangle their kid, because you just know better A Wizard of Goatse fucked around with this message at 17:19 on Mar 24, 2018 |
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Mar 24, 2018 17:15
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I [25F] found out fiancé [35M] been cheating. It's 5 am in morning, I just found out my partner (of 9 years) who I'm supposed to be marrying in August has been cheating on me online with another woman, and flirt with multiple other women on some mobile game. He got drunk and I was curious what he was doing before he fell asleep. There are short messages between him and her going on about how they miss each other and how they love each other. A little back story, couple of years ago our relationship was rough, involved domestic abuse and lot of verbal abuse from him along with neglecting me and only needing me for sex. He wouldn't break up with me so I ended up bonding with someone else and went behind his back as a way to escape him. He convinced me he changed and that I should focus on us only and that it'll be better. I ended with the other guy and I changed and focused my entire life for him and our kids. It's been years since that incident and I've been nothing but dedicated and loyal to him. I understand he might have doubts or worries now. I constantly show him I've changed and remained loyal despite him falling back into his abusive ways and calling me names or bring up the past about me to justify anytime he screwed up or was emotionally destroying me (alone or in front of my family). Now when he was caught, he got angry I said I had evidence of his betrayal and he shoved me and pinned me down to snatch my phone from me for the evidence. He spent last three hours telling me why did I get forgiven when I messed up and he can't. I'm not trying to make an excuse for myself but I did nothing to make him feel the need to cheat on me like how he abused me during the time I went behind his back (despite many attempts to break up). He's making out its my fault he did it, that it's OK for me but not for him, or how it's because he never got over what I did and he enjoyed the attention these women gave him. I work, come home, look after the kids and take care of him and check on his well being mentally and physically so I don't understand why he is blaming me for this. We even argue because I tell him he needs to put more effort in and make me and his kids feel appreciated because he doesn't bother with us and just focus on his phone game. He says I'm what he wants and he loves me but I don't see it anymore. I hated myself for what I did even if he was a jerk to me, but years of changing and being a better person I feel like he threw all my effort into my face to blame me for his betrayal. What do I do now? I'm lost. I don't know what's next anymore. Cancel the wedding? Go with it? Give him a chance? Leave him and focus on myself and the kids? I'm sorry for rambling..just so much to process right now. tl;dr : fiancé cheated with multiple women on mobile game and messenger app and blamed me for it. Says he forgave me for cheating on him years ago when he was verbally and physically abusive to me, so I need to forgive him and not leave him.
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Mar 24, 2018 17:17
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u are never required to forgive someone unless u are literally jesus and even then his dad sorta has him by the balls
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Mar 24, 2018 17:21
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lol that she cheated on him and his reaction was "sweet, this makes one Get Out Of Cheating Free card"
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Mar 24, 2018 17:22
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Pick posted:u are never required to forgive someone unless u are literally jesus and even then his dad sorta has him by the balls clearly you havent heard of the binding spell "but I said I'm sorry"
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Mar 24, 2018 17:22
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Jeza posted:Keeping secrets isn't the same as lying. Yes, this is a big secret to have, but the justification is for their overall safety, something he is in a much better position to judge given they are living in the neighbourhood he grew up in. Not sure what other important poo poo you're referring to. Yeah, it is. If he knew guns were a deal-breaker and knowingly kept it from her, he was lying. It doesn't matter what the secret is or how justified his actions were. That she only found out because he pulled it on a stranger for no apparent reason while high is probably lucky for her, since it makes it clear that she needs to get the hell out of dodge.
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Mar 24, 2018 17:23
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Jeza posted:clearly you havent heard of the binding spell "but I said I'm sorry" there are a lot of people who haven't realized that saying "I'M SORRY" doesn't mean anything if you don't actually regret what you did (the regret being what will prevent you from turning around and doing the exact same thing as little as several hours later) and I REALLY do NOT need to mention a guy who did this A LOT
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Mar 24, 2018 17:24
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Pick posted:I do wonder if men feel emasculated in this age when few of them can support a family on their own and women are pretty much as well off without them. They do, but part of that is because we have hosed up values and we tell men the only way they're valuable and masculine is if they are A Provider. We've tied the whole concept of masculinity into unfair expectations, so it's frighteningly easy for men to be emasculated these days. The fact that society ever convinced women they needed to be fully reliant on men was in part for men to have control over their lineage, since they cannot actually give birth themselves. It was unfortunate that it ever became so entrenched to the point of setting up family structures to support this and convincing women they're actually less. It's a real convenient way to keep someone dependent on you. Women should really just be allowed to set their own lineages and pass on their own last names if they please. A Wizard of Goatse posted:The solution to this conundrum is have a serious conversation about your guns well in advance of getting loving married, and if the two of you can't come to a halfway sane arrangement leave them to find someone who can, don't go behind their back and make it impossible for them to reasonably account for relevant safety things like the loving gun in the car while trying to wrangle their kid, because you just know better This. The wife is only reacting so intensely because getting lied to then thrown into a situation where your high partner is pointing a gun at someone's forehead is enough to freak one the gently caress out, and dig one's heels in on a subject. By keeping the gun from her then making her first experience with it as aimed at someone's head, he just reinforced her perception of gun owners as adrenalized goons. StrangersInTheNight fucked around with this message at 17:37 on Mar 24, 2018 |
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Mar 24, 2018 17:31
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Well someone's got to provide, so if it's unfair to men, it would be just as unfair to remove that metric because then it falls onto women to provide, as well as nurture and do literally everything else except the requisite household anime watching
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Mar 24, 2018 17:42
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Pick posted:Well someone's got to provide, so if it's unfair to men, it would be just as unfair to remove that metric because then it falls onto women to provide, as well as nurture and do literally everything else except the requisite household anime watching "equality is hard  "
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Mar 24, 2018 17:47
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Zulily Zoetrope posted:Yeah, it is. If he knew guns were a deal-breaker and knowingly kept it from her, he was lying. It doesn't matter what the secret is or how justified his actions were. That she only found out because he pulled it on a stranger for no apparent reason while high is probably lucky for her, since it makes it clear that she needs to get the hell out of dodge. He pulled it with insufficient justification, but not for no reason. Anyway you believing there is no distinction between lying and keeping a secret is just absurd, sorry.
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Mar 24, 2018 17:49
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Pick posted:Well someone's got to provide, so if it's unfair to men, it would be just as unfair to remove that metric because then it falls onto women to provide, as well as nurture and do literally everything else except the requisite household anime watching How about we remove that metric but add the nurturing and literally everything else?
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Mar 24, 2018 17:52
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my point is more that what is fair? if it's not fair to one, it's not fair to shift it to the other either, and it has to be done, so who ought to do it?
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Mar 24, 2018 17:53
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husband (50) is sarcastic and unpleasant during family time with me (43f) and son (11)quote:My husband and I have been together almost 4 years. I'll try to keep this brief.
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Mar 24, 2018 17:58
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Pick posted:my point is more that what is fair? if it's not fair to one, it's not fair to shift it to the other either, and it has to be done, so who ought to do it? I figure that would be a conversation that'd vary from relationship to relationship, though it's probably impossible not to bring expectations/biases into that. Like, it'd probably be ideal if someone said, "Yes, I'd love to be responsible for looking after the children a larger portion of the time," and if that happend to be the woman, for it not to be said because they were brought up thinking that is their job as a woman. E: verb tense Batterypowered7 fucked around with this message at 18:16 on Mar 24, 2018 |
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Mar 24, 2018 18:11
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Pick posted:my point is more that what is fair? if it's not fair to one, it's not fair to shift it to the other either, and it has to be done, so who ought to do it? Isnt the allocation of household chores the job of my butler?
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Mar 24, 2018 18:12
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Pick posted:I do wonder if men feel emasculated in this age when few of them can support a family on their own and women are pretty much as well off without them. Yes?
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Mar 24, 2018 18:20
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Barudak posted:Isnt the allocation of household chores the job of my butler? or your steward
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Mar 24, 2018 18:21
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Pick posted:um not at all, that's the job of your steward. Right? The butler just gets you poo poo. Your steward runs the estate.
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Mar 24, 2018 18:22
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